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You are here: Home / Humorous / Kerry Joke

Kerry Joke

by John Cole|  August 23, 20049:00 pm| 3 Comments

This post is in: Humorous

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I am sure this joke has seen many different incarnations, but I found it amusing:

Kerry was going to visit the Catholic National Cathedral outside Washington as part of his campaign. Kerry’s campaign manager made a visit to the Cardinal and said to him, “We’ve been getting a lot of bad publicity among Catholics because of Kerry’s position on abortion and the like. We’d gladly make a contribution to the church of $100,000 if during your sermon you’d say John Kerry is a saint.”

The Cardinal thinks it over for a moment and agrees to do it.

Kerry shows up, and as the Mass progresses the Cardinal begins his homily. “John Kerry is petty, a self absorbed hypocrite and a nit-wit.
He is a liar, a cheat, and a thief. He is the worst example of a Catholic I’ve ever personally known. But compared to Ted Kennedy, John Kerry is a
saint.”

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Reader Interactions

3Comments

  1. 1.

    Gary Farber

    August 23, 2004 at 9:50 pm

    Although I agree with none of the sentiments, it was structurally funny, and it made me grin.

    Doesn’t persuade me of anything, but the grin was pleasant.

    :-)

  2. 2.

    Colin Clark

    August 25, 2004 at 7:49 am

    Actually, the Catholic National Cathedral is in Washington. Also, the media would report this news with the headline, “Catholic Cardinal Says Kerry Is A Saint.”

  3. 3.

    chico

    September 16, 2004 at 7:52 pm

    I thought it was funny before I didnt, LOL.

    Iraq polls show that the majority of Iraqis’ want bush to be re-elected by a rather substantial amount.

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