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You are here: Home / Humorous / Liveblogging The Open Source Media Soiree

Liveblogging The Open Source Media Soiree

by John Cole|  November 16, 20052:57 pm| 16 Comments

This post is in: Humorous

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Jeff provides another OSM update:

Kind of a hairy moment during our exquisite catered lunch (just prior to Judith Miller’s keynote address on media shield laws, just after the flan and espresso service) when Vanity Fair contributing editor James Walcott—posing as a “conservative blogger” (which, to his effete and Syrah-soaked mind, translated to tying on a camouflage-print ascot and lacing a pair of Timberland Canard Wapack Gauchos over his leg warmers)—tried to crash the OSM launch party.

For a flaccid, pinkish man-child with the loose-skinned jowels of a Churchil bloodhound, Walcott, I must admit, put up quite a spirited fight—slapping his way past the NYU kid posted at the door and managing to gallup all the way to the sundae bar, screaming filthy John Cornyn limericks the whole way—before finally being sacked and wrestled to the ground by Tammy Bruce (who felled him with a brutal forearm shiver) and Pam of Atlas Shrugs (who wrapped his twitching bulk in her thighs like a ball python wraps a gerbil) until security could escort him kicking and biting out of the building.

Heh.

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Reader Interactions

16Comments

  1. 1.

    John S.

    November 16, 2005 at 3:02 pm

    John-

    Might I ask what has triggered your recent overt fawning over and unhealthy obsession with Jeff?

  2. 2.

    Davebo

    November 16, 2005 at 3:12 pm

    Well, Jeff’s reporting doesn’t bode well for the future of Pajama’s Media/SemiOpenSource media.

    It’s Wolcott. But hey, it’s not like he’s a reporter or OSM is a media site right?

  3. 3.

    Tim F.

    November 16, 2005 at 3:14 pm

    Don’t know why the rightwing thinks it owns flannel shirts and workboots. The founding fathers of conservatism were r-dropping bluebloods to a man. Buckley still gets his gourmet burgers delivered on china by the ‘help.’

  4. 4.

    Mike S

    November 16, 2005 at 3:14 pm

    (which, to his effete and Syrah-soaked mind, translated to tying on a camouflage-print ascot and lacing a pair of Timberland Canard Wapack Gauchos over his leg warmers)

    Sounds about right.

    before finally being sacked and wrestled to the ground by Tammy Bruce (who felled him with a brutal forearm shiver

    Her banshee voise would have been sufficient.

  5. 5.

    Lines

    November 16, 2005 at 3:23 pm

    Pam of Atlas Shrugs (who wrapped his twitching bulk in her thighs like a ball python wraps a gerbil)

    Don’t harpies like to use their claws first?

  6. 6.

    neil

    November 16, 2005 at 3:28 pm

    Yuck, what a dog’s breakfast of prose. Reminds me of why I like Wolcott more.

  7. 7.

    Nikki

    November 16, 2005 at 3:32 pm

    neil Says:

    Yuck, what a dog’s breakfast of prose. Reminds me of why I like Wolcott more.

    Indeed.

  8. 8.

    Mike in SLO

    November 16, 2005 at 3:44 pm

    Ditto Nikki & Neal… You may not agree with Wolcott, but you have to admit he’s a better writer than most everyone else out there.

  9. 9.

    Jill

    November 16, 2005 at 3:48 pm

    Heh, indeedy, Neil and Nikki!

  10. 10.

    John Cole

    November 16, 2005 at 3:50 pm

    I think James Walcott is a great writer, and were Jeff trying to write like that, rather than a snarky ‘livebloggin’ piece which was designed to be over the top, perhaps then I would bother to ‘compare’ the two.

    This was just funny. That is all.

  11. 11.

    Otto Man

    November 16, 2005 at 3:52 pm

    Add me to the list who thinks this just makes Jeff G. look bad in comparison. He can’t even get his name right. Sheesh.

  12. 12.

    Lines

    November 16, 2005 at 3:57 pm

    It would have been funnier if it had been Bill O’Reilly that tried to crash the party, since neither side wants the ol’Falafel fellating fiend.

  13. 13.

    Jack Roy

    November 16, 2005 at 4:30 pm

    Ugh. So the new rightward-bloggers’ style guide is to:

    1) When in doubt, sneer at someone French;
    2) If he’s not French, pretend he is, using wine, etc., as proxy for French-ness;
    3) If you can’t even pretend, insinuate homo-ness, or at least say he’s effete and fat.

    But seriously. ‘s’very funny.

  14. 14.

    Steve S

    November 16, 2005 at 4:55 pm

    Apparently we’re not allowed to point out how similar Jeff G. is to Al Sharpton defending Tawana Brawley.

    But I’ll bet you that Jeff G. would have no problem attacking Sharpton.

    Well hey, whaddya know…
    proteinwisdom.com/index.php/weblog/entry/18900/

    Now that’s Identity Politics for ya.

  15. 15.

    Sine.Qua.Non

    November 16, 2005 at 7:40 pm

    Fairly typical Jeff Goldstein snarkdom.

  16. 16.

    Mac Buckets

    November 17, 2005 at 10:31 am

    That genius deserves a “Freaking” in between his first and last names. He can slug with the right brain and the left. Jeff Freaking Goldstein.

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