From a memo passed to me by a source who insists that he/she can be trusted:
The next meeting of the War on Christmas, Pittsburgh chapter, will be held this saturday at the usual time in the Masonic temple in Oakland. Please bring a #2 pencil if you plan to vote in the steering committee election, and non-perishable goods for the food drive. To whoever brought an half-empty box of spaghetti last month, it makes you look bad and it makes us look bad, so knock it off.
Scheduled topics include our progress in infiltrating government, possible alternative names for the peri-New Year’s holiday (as per last month’s vote, Bacchusmas is no longer an option) and pagan efforts to reclaim the tree and rabbit. Remember, if the O’Reilly Factor shows up it’s CRITICAL to deny everything. We can’t afford to be exposed with victory so near at hand.
XXXXXX
Secretary pro tem
Consider this an open War on Christmas thread.