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You are here: Home / Politics / War on Terror / War on Terror aka GSAVE® / I’ve Got Better Angels In My Pants

I’ve Got Better Angels In My Pants

by Tim F|  September 12, 200611:22 am| 19 Comments

This post is in: War on Terror aka GSAVE®, Blogospheric Navel-Gazing

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Roger L. Simon, waxing sentimental about why he is better than the angry internet people (via Inactivist):

Those of us who voted for Bush need at least a portion of those who voted for Kerry on our side to defeat this enemy. But that hasn’t happened. Of course we could blame the mainstream media for this (and, yes, many of them are wretched) or the dim bulb moveon.org crowd. But blame gets you nowhere, except the dubious honor of proclaiming yourself to be “right.” It doesn’t get the job accomplished.

…

On this five year memorial day, the only way I can see to lighten my mood is to tell myself to continue to write and to argue with my political opponents, endeavoring to convince them by reasonable means. I will do my best to resist gloating or preaching to the choir (although it can garner a lot of Internet hits) because I don’t think it does any good.

Maybe Roger decided to resist gloating because it would make him look insane. For example:

The chief of intelligence for the Marine Corps in Iraq recently filed an unusual secret report concluding that the prospects for securing that country’s western Anbar province are dim and that there is almost nothing the U.S. military can do to improve the political and social situation there, said several military officers and intelligence officials familiar with its contents.

The officials described Col. Pete Devlin’s classified assessment of the dire state of Anbar as the first time that a senior U.S. military officer has filed so negative a report from Iraq.

One Army officer summarized it as arguing that in Anbar province, “We haven’t been defeated militarily but we have been defeated politically — and that’s where wars are won and lost.”

When Roger Simon promises to resist gloating he apparently means that he won’t do what Roger Simon did in December 2005:

I feel sorry for people like David Corn who have put themselves in such a box that they de facto are rooting for failure in Iraq, no matter how much they deny that. This is the fate of the modern fuddy-duddy liberal who was formerly in the “cool” position and now finds himself allied with most reactionary forces on earth just because he loathes George Bush on stylistics. Yes, that’s what it seems to come down to. What a brutal historical joke.

After the death of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi:

AN EXAMPLE of what I mean about foxholes is here. It’s clear that not-so-deep-down Tim Russert doesn’t want us to succeed in Iraq. Reason: it wasn’t his team that advocated it. How completely pathetic is that!

That should help clear up what is going on here. When things look rosy (or even when shit can be credibly sold as lemonade) you can set your watch by the gloating from Roger L. Simon and friends. Fun drinking game – wait for yet another al Qaeda #2 to go down and take a shot every time a GOPer declares that defeatist Democrats don’t want to win the war on terror. Take two if he or she couples defeatism with a psychological diagnosis involving reflexive Bush hatred. Take another if inane example X illustrates why Dems cannot be trusted with security and what the heck, call 911 before you pass out.

Right now Roger has given over to his better angels simply because he doesn’t have a damned thing to gloat about. The rules by which he and others operate are pretty simple: when you have an edge you twist the knife. When you don’t have an edge you play the bigger man. There are more sophisticated reflex pathways in nine hundred cell roundworms.

Here’s a thought. Maybe if people think that America needs some happy bipartisan fun together time they can pass that on to the people running our country right now. Most of us understand that Rove long ago wrote off the Kerry voters (showing, obviously, that the left half of America is irredeemably insane). Rather it looks like the White House is more focused on bringing the swiftboat love to insufficiently lockstepping Republicans:

Next week, I’m informed via troubled White House sources, will see the full unveiling of Karl Rove’s fall election strategy. He’s intending to line up 9/11 families to accuse McCain, Warner and Graham of delaying justice for the perpetrators of that atrocity, because they want to uphold the ancient judicial traditions of the U.S. military and abide by the Constitution. He will use the families as an argument for legalizing torture, setting up kangaroo courts for military prisoners, and giving war crime impunity for his own aides and cronies. This is his “Hail Mary” move for November; it’s brutally exploitative of 9/11; it’s pure partisanship; and it’s designed to enable an untrammeled executive.

Charming. This also suggests that the bipartisan message has not sufficiently penetrated. Maybe things will improve in October.

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19Comments

  1. 1.

    Geek, Esq.

    September 12, 2006 at 11:30 am

    Simon is a dildo. I’m sure the families of the 2000+ soldiers who lost their lives in the Iraq disaster will be heartened by his unwillingness to gloat as that country falls apart.

    People like him don’t live in reality.

  2. 2.

    Mr Furious

    September 12, 2006 at 11:30 am

    Dear Roger,

    Go fuck yourself.

    Sincerely,
    Mr. Furious (aka Angry Internet Person)

  3. 3.

    The Other Steve

    September 12, 2006 at 11:31 am

    Apparently Roger L. Simon is also resisting admitting when he was wrong.

  4. 4.

    Tim F.

    September 12, 2006 at 11:48 am

    Mr. Furious (aka Angry Internet Person)

    That seems somehow redundant.

  5. 5.

    les

    September 12, 2006 at 11:51 am

    There are more sophisticated reflex pathways in nine hundred cell roundworms.

    Much thanks. May I borrow that?

  6. 6.

    RSA

    September 12, 2006 at 12:16 pm

    But blame gets you nowhere, except the dubious honor of proclaiming yourself to be “right.”

    Being “right” is such a dubious honor, which I decline at every opportunity. Apparently like Roger, I would prefer to be “wrong”.

  7. 7.

    Andrew

    September 12, 2006 at 12:22 pm

    I don’t see any serious Democratic proposals for losing Iraq.

  8. 8.

    Pb

    September 12, 2006 at 12:28 pm

    I don’t see any serious Democratic proposals for losing Iraq.

    I thought it was ‘cut and run’. You see, because the Democrats have no ideas, that’s *why* the Republicans have to make up ideas for them instead!

  9. 9.

    Mike S

    September 12, 2006 at 12:59 pm

    Roger might be able to convince me he is right. Of course he needs to find something he’s right about in order to do so.

    The game plan for just about every hack in Roger’s mold seems to be to keep acting like they are right. They think they will wear people down and get us to think, “golly, he’s so sure he’s right that he must be.” That might work with the talk radio audiance but it doesn’t work with anyone that is actually paying attention to anything other than GOPropagandists. Eventually even the scarecrow saw the man behind the curtain and he, like the Republican dead enders, didn’t even have a brain.

  10. 10.

    The Amazing Jambi

    September 12, 2006 at 1:12 pm

    Sadly enough, Mike S, you’re most likely correct. Sometimes I wonder at the malleability of the human mind, and just how easy it is to manipulate group opinion. That said, I will still never understand how a country with a traditionally anti-intellectual bent thinks its a good idea to listen to experts that “do our thinking for us”, especially since many of these experts have dubious qualifications at best. Oh well, it’s neither the first nor will it be the last time the public’s been duped by repetition. Four legs good, two legs better! Baaaaa!

  11. 11.

    Tsulagi

    September 12, 2006 at 3:29 pm

    What the fuck has he EVER had to gloat about concerning Iraq?? From day one, this no-fault, spine-free administration has done its level best to set up the military for defeat.

    Just a few of the highlights; it’s a big reel.

    We wargame for Iraq. Planning for which started as soon as the admin came in and the eventual $250 million games involving thousands of personnel and assets were conducted before our invasion. The Cheney/Rumsfeld/PNAC less-is-more battle plan is put to the test for validation! The Red Team, led by a Marine LTG, hands them a new ass.

    Oops. Conclusion? The plan must be good so the general isn’t playing fair. They restart putting restrictions on the bad guys. He burns them again. The general gets his ass chewed and is told he can’t make key decisions. They restart again, this time with overwhelming restrictions and also forced to accept the “known” that the entire population will welcome us as liberators. Blue team wins. Surprise. General calls bullshit and refuses to sign off on the result saying he will not be part of a plan that will get service men and women killed. He resigns from the military.

    Six months later we invade. We’re going to be in the nation building business. Anyway, who would you choose to lead that? You have a State Dept. whose job is international relations and more. It’s led by a former four-star with a lot of knowledge of the region, who has respect of the military leadership, credibility abroad, and knows what the military can and cannot do. Give it to Powell? No way! You give it largely to the PNAC choir in the Pentagon like Wolfowitz, Feith, etc. whose main knowledge of the region and military capability is gleaned from their inbred “think tank” soirees. Brilliant!

    Start the new Iraq! Jay Garner, while waiting for the singalongs from the happy population, gets off to a slow start. Part of the reason is at the last minute he is told to vet his staff removing any from the State Dept., and to make sure all his people are right-to-lifers. You just know all those Iraqi women would have been lining up for abortions. Garner is told by Rumsfeld this direction comes from the highest authority. Garner assumes that’s Cheney.

    Whack Garner, bring in Bremer. Besides his monumental brain-dead Iraqi military decision, CPA comes to be staffed by 90-day wonders. They come in, pad their resumes, then leave 90 days later typically for conservative “think” tanks and other organizations. While there, they make Iraq security and reconstruction decisions and oversee billions of dollars. You wonder why there is $8 billion unaccounted for?

    Oh, and while you’re there Bremer, don’t forget to throw out the most secular constitution in a Muslim country. Now they have one where in the preamble it states “No law before Islam.” You just know the theocons are jealous.

    You could go on and on. Their retardation has been relentless. Apparently they’re counting on those more retarded to vote for them on national security.

  12. 12.

    HyperIon

    September 12, 2006 at 4:18 pm

    Right now Roger has given over to his better angels simply because he doesn’t have a damned thing to gloat about. The rules by which he and others operate are pretty simple: when you have an edge you twist the knife. When you don’t have an edge you play the bigger man. There are more sophisticated reflex pathways in nine hundred cell roundworms.

    ouch!

    thank you for that well-written and well-argued paragraph.
    and from a science guy, too, not a mass communications professional.

    i’m so proud…my ion is even more hyper.

  13. 13.

    RSA

    September 12, 2006 at 5:40 pm

    We wargame for Iraq.

    For those who don’t know about it already, Malcolm Gladwell gives a brief but cool description of what happened in his book Blink.

  14. 14.

    Richard Bottoms

    September 12, 2006 at 6:04 pm

    Please couple this with a vow to cease hanging your head about being a Democrat and moaning about how mean the Republicans are. Fuck all of them.

    There are no bad Democrats.

    There are no good Republicans. Anywhere.

  15. 15.

    Krista

    September 12, 2006 at 7:54 pm

    Tim, if you have angels in your pants, what on earth are you doing wasting your time here blogging?

  16. 16.

    chopper

    September 12, 2006 at 8:59 pm

    on the 5th anniversary of 9/11, what’s this douchebag gonna gloat over? the fact that bin laden is still at large?

    given the number of statements we can dig up (thanks to teh intarweb) of rightists claiming victory over the liberals at every turn in iraq only to be proven premature weeks later, you’d think simon would have learned that gloating is something you do after the job is finished.

    seriously, there are so many hacks who were so quick to point and laugh at liberals after the quick invasion of iraq, saying we’d be out of there quickly and safely and you guys look like fools etc etc. then of course the disastrous occupation began. and the liberals were proven completely right.

  17. 17.

    jh

    September 13, 2006 at 8:27 am

    Tsulagi wins Post of the Week.

  18. 18.

    Andrew

    September 13, 2006 at 10:40 am

    Cool. A self trackback!

Comments are closed.

Trackbacks

  1. Balloon Juice says:
    September 13, 2006 at 9:50 am

    […] Rumsfeld has many sins, god knows. In my view the most heinous is probably the number of Americans who have died unnecessarily because the people who killed them don’t fit into the sanitary Rumsfeld model for how people who oppose America are supposed to fight. Cue the Bush representative X throws up his hands and laments that, alas, nobody could have anticipated they would do that! USMC General Paul Van Riper did (thanks to a commenter for reminding me). The Riper insurgency model handed the Rumsfeld model its ass. Twice. Any idiot could see that Iraqis might not fight according to the sanitary Rumsfeld model, that ignoring Riper’s success could get American kids killed, but we’re not dealing with ordinary idiots. For political reasons (asking for more troops might demand something resembling sacrifice, which would hurt GOP electoral chances) the Riper results were simply airbrushed out of the final report. […]

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