Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

… looking like a winsome Bee Gee who has stumbled into teaching geography

Thanks for reminding me that Van Jones needs to be slapped.

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

Quote tweet friends, screenshot enemies.

Bark louder, little dog.

“I never thought they’d lock HIM up,” sobbed a distraught member of the Lock Her Up Party.

I’m pretty sure there’s only one Jack Smith.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

In short, I come down firmly on all sides of the issue.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

And we’re all out of bubblegum.

White supremacy is terrorism.

A lot of Dems talk about what the media tells them to talk about. Not helpful.

You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. Go Senator Whitehouse!

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

They love authoritarianism, but only when they get to be the authoritarians.

Everybody saw this coming.

Second rate reporter says what?

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

Accused of treason; bitches about the ratings. I am in awe.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Conservatism: there are some people the law protects but does not bind and others who the law binds but does not protect.

You are here: Home / Politics / Republican Stupidity / Jerry Falwell And Dinesh D’Souza: Gays Caused 9/11

Jerry Falwell And Dinesh D’Souza: Gays Caused 9/11

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When it comes to terrorism it looks like certain pundits argued against root causes before they argued for them. James Wolcott takes it away:

[Y]esterday I received the galley of Dinesh D’Souza’s new book from Doubleday, The Enemy at Home: The Cultural Left and Its Responsibility for 9/11, to be published in January 2007.

[…] The theme of the book is quite simple, and vile.

“In this book I make a claim that will seem startling at the outset. The cultural left in this country is responsible for causing 9/11.”

Then the qualifiers begin multiplying. The term ‘cultural left’ doesn’t refer to the Democratic Party, nor to all liberals. (Peter Beinart presumably gets a pass.) Nor is he saying that cultural lefties actually brought the towers down. He isn’t so rash as to suggest Molly Ivins piloted one of the planes, parachuting to safety before impact. So what is he saying?

“I am saying that the cultural left and its allies in Congress, the media, Hollywood, the nonprofit sector [profiteers are always patriots, of course], and the universities are the primary cause of the volcano of anger toward America that is erupting from the Islamic world.”

[…] Muslims are angry, D’Souza concedes, but they are mostly angry because their anger has been fueled and fanned by the cultural left.

“Thus without the cultural left, 9/11 would not have happened.”

I like that “Thus,” as if he’s actually proven something.

“I realize that this is a strong charge,” D’Souza writes, “one that no one has made before.”

We have danced this idiotic dance several times already. Ramesh Ponnuru published a stinking culture grenade called Party of Death and then played a game of footsie with critics about whether he specifically meant to impugn the Democratic party. A typical example from Ponnuru’s appearance on the Colbert Report:

Ponnuru: […] I need to explain that not all Democrats are part of the Party of Death, and some Republicans are part of the Party of Death. I’m using that phrase really to refer to all the forces in our politics and culture —

Colbert: Does it say some Republicans on this? No, it doesn’t: it just says “The Democrats, the Media, the Courts” — just probably ran out of ink at some point.

Ponnuru: There’s a lot about the Democrats, a lot about the media, and a lot about the courts in the book.

The rules of this game are pretty simple. The knuckle-chewing targets of Ponnuru’s diatribe will see the book, read ‘Democrats=death” and, one hopes, never vote Dem again. This is a fairly mundane if hilariously stupid effort to poison the well by making folks see the opposing party not just as wrong on some issues but viscerally, fundamentally unacceptable. Evil even. See, who loves death? Evil people. And Democrats. Recent elections show that this stuff works like a charm.

Ponnuru’s problem is that his simplistic “argument” doesn’t hold up to ten seconds of honest scrutiny. So to preserve his credibility Ponnuru plays an elaborate game of denying that he means to say what he is obviously trying to say. From the dust jacket of his book:

Is the Democratic Party the “Party of Death”?

If you look at their agenda they are.

Pretty bald as lying goes. Good for Ponnuru that the womblike environs of a wingnut welfare outfit like NRO rank credibility on the list of important skills right around fire juggling and needlework.

Look for D’Souza to play the same silly game, and then Jonah Goldberg soon after with his book about how liberals are worse than Hitler. Followers will hear that Democrats are horrible evil awful people who want to eat your baby while the authors nakedly lie to the rest of us about what they “really” mean to say.

Another day in the rightwing noise machine.

Reader Interactions

71Comments

  2. 2.

    Steve

    D’Souza’s book is a million times worse than anything Ponnuru wrote. I’d personally like to lock the guy in a room with all the “9/11 was an inside job” crazies and let them tear each other to pieces.

    If you argue that “bin Laden thinks the cultural Left is decadent” and simultaneously argue that “the cultural Left actually IS decadent,” what it adds up to is a claim that bin Laden is justified in what he does. That’s sick.

  3. 3.

    ThymeZone

    I swear on everything that is the morass of Pajamas Media and its frequent crashes and timestamp errors and antispam filter failures, I have no idea why that double posted.

  4. 4.

    Pb

    At least President George W. Bush is taking a strong stand to prevent and deter future terrorism here. He has correctly realized that “the terrorists hate us for our freedoms”, and has therefore enacted strong measures to ensure that in the future, the terrorists will no longer have that reason to hate us.

  5. 5.

    searp

    Some more basic questions: why do people who say this get published? Why do they get an audience? What happened to some sort of decency? I cannot help but think that this would have ended up in a John Birch publication 40 years ago, not in a major book release followed by tons of TV time.

    What the hell is going on?

  6. 6.

    Pb

    searp,

    Are those practical questions, or social ones? We can probably trace back the funding and backing on this, at least.

  7. 7.

    ThymeZone

    why do people who say this get published? Why do they get an audience

    There’s a market for it.

    Millions are spent on Rapture books. Nothing could possibly be crazier than that shit.

    If someone will buy the crap, someone else will sell it to them.

  8. 8.

    Tim F.

    There’s a market for it.

    Actually I wonder how many of those books, after the bulk buys and massive ad blitzes and cetera, actually make money. I bet that overall the message is about as profitable as the National Review. Which is to say, not.

    The people behind stuff like this, Scaife for example, don’t need the money. They have plenty of that. The point here is the agenda.

  9. 9.

    Pb

    Or, for that matter, The Washington Times. But yeah, what Tim said. And in the larger sense, their agenda has made them money, collectively.

  11. 11.

    matt

    I’m not sure this is an argument conservatives want to be playing with, simply because if the culture left is al qaeda’s real enemy, what does that make the cultural right?

    I don’t think they thought this one through.

  12. 12.

    Punchy

    Echoing Tim’s comment–how many of these knuckle-dragging, barely-enough-money-to-buy-cigs redneck racists actually buy these and/or can read?

    It’s hard to reach the base with these books when many of your most ardent supporters live in double-wides, have a 4th grade reading level, and whose idea of “reading a book” is following a reciepe for meth.

  13. 13.

    Tsulagi

    Jerry Falwell And Dinesh D’Souza: Gays Caused 9/11

    The Dobson/retardocon base needs this kind of shit to shore itself up not just for the midterms, but for the long slog in the next presidential election cycle.

    The base has been starting to see ripples in the Matrix. Glitches abound. Need to give them some nourishing pablum of fear and hate to keep the pods delusional.

  15. 15.

    matt

    Tim, John, why wasn’t my comment allowed? Not trying to be a pain, just curious.

    btw, my last comment doesn’t make a lot of sense without the context of my earlier comment.

  16. 16.

    Andrew

    Fuck it. I’m voting for Hillary. I don’t like her at all but I think she’s the one who would just blackbag these fuckers, take them to Gitmo and saw their nuts off.

  17. 17.

    Andrew

    Millions are spent on Rapture books. Nothing could possibly be crazier than that shit.

    I watched Left Behind III on Friday. I haven’t seen the first two, but I can make a pretty good guess at what happens during the Rapture scene. It’s pretty cool because God gives President Louis Gossett Jr. to turn invisible. I’m serious.

    And yes, I lost a bet.

  18. 18.

    ThymeZone

    “There was a time when publishers used their best-sellers to subsidize books they wanted to publish that wouldn’t sell,” notes Dinesh D’Souza, who published his first book, a biography of Jerry Falwell, with Regnery more than a decade ago and has done three books with The Free Press, Illiberal Education, An End to Racism and Ronald Reagan: How an Ordinary Man Became an Extraordinary President, which appeared last year and sold more than 70,000 copies. That’s more than either of D’Souza’s other Free Press books.

    “No longer do publishers let bestsellers pay for other books. Now every book must pay its own way,” says D’Souza, which means “misfires” — books a publisher took a risk on, that seemed to promise many buyers but then failed to deliver sales. These acquire a bad name that spreads to other books of the same variety, and make it hard for them to get published.

    Mainstream publishers, such as Random House, the publisher of this book, publish books for one and only one reason: To make a profit.

  19. 19.

    Punchy

    Tim, John, why wasn’t my comment allowed? Not trying to be a pain, just curious.

    Because Mr. Cole insists on being sponsored by Bra and Panties Publishing, which has a track record similar to that of the Exxon Valdez in Alaska…

  20. 20.

    Davebo

    So a guy who got his pilots license 7 months ago is allowed to fly his private aircraft over Manhattan.

    Do ya feel safer now?

  21. 21.

    t. jasper parnell

    As usual the King of the March has his facts wrong. The origin of radical Islams hatred of American decadence is

    Qutb was an admirer of America until, in his capacity as an employee of the Egyptian education department, he travelled to America in 1948, remaining until 1951. The decadence he perceived during this trip had such an impact that on his return to Egypt, he joined Hassan al-Banna’s revolutionary Ikhwan al-Muslimin (Muslim Brotherhood, MB), losing his Education Ministry post in the process. In describing this life choice, Qutb said, “I was born in 1951

    In particular, if I recall correctly, all the Frat and Sorority mixers.

  22. 22.

    SeesThroughIt

    I’d personally like to lock the guy in a room with all the “9/11 was an inside job” crazies and let them tear each other to pieces.

    I’ve got $50 on renting the room and purchasing any necessary plane tickets.

    On the subject of rapture films, I highly recommend Megiddo: the Omega Code 2. It stars Basil Exposition as Satan’s on-Earth operative, R. Lee Ermey (who is absolutely awesome in every way, and I refuse to hear arguments to the contrary) as the president, some foreign leaders straight out of Crappy Central Casting, and the best special effects $46.71 can buy. Fantastic entertainment.

  24. 24.

    The Other Steve

    ROTFL!!!!! BWAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA!!!!!

    So Jerry Falwell and whoever the hell this other guy is, thinks that the way to fight terrorism is to capitulate to them!

    We must immediately reverse the Bill of Rights.

    Women should only wear burkas when outside, and then only to go to the store because the idea of women working is repulsive.

    Gays back in the closet.

    Rock n’ Roll off the airwaves!

    Immediately repeal the Twenty First amendment.

    What else? State control of movies and television.

    The Cultural Revolution is here! Chairman Mao would be so proud!

  25. 25.

    Sstarr

    “I am saying that … the media, Hollywood, the nonprofit sector, and the universities are the primary cause of the volcano of anger toward America that is erupting from the Islamic world.

    So muslims are exposed to Women’s Studies programs, NPR Pledge drives and reruns of “Dallas” and then explode in rage? Sounds reasonable to me. Truly we won’t win in the war on terror until we have closed the universities, shut down the girl scouts and banned film and television.

  27. 27.

    badtux

    Did D’Souza copulate with pigs on his uncle’s pig farm?
    Did D’Souza tear newborn infants into pieces with his bare hands then eat the still-twitching body parts with a big grin on his face?
    Did D’Souza have sex with his mother after having sex with his father?
    Did D’Souza personally kill John F. Kennedy in Dallas?

    Hey, just askin’, y’know!

    – Badtux the Snarky Penguin

  28. 28.

    Rusty Shackleford

    How can Democrats logically be referred to as the “Party of Death”? Aren’t Democrats generally regarded as “anti-war”, “anti-gun”, “anti-death penalty”? Does being “pro-choice” trump everything else? Doesn’t support for “stem cell research to find cures for diseases that kill people” count for anything?

    These books by D’Souza and Ponnuru are Orwellian. Sean Hannity’s presentation of Hillary Clinton and Nancy Pelosi is the FOX News version of “Two Minutes Hate”. We are assaulted with “newspeak” all the time and listening to Bush’s recent series of speeches has led me to conclude that it will only get worse.

    Today our President, George W. Bush said this about the Iraqi people, “I am, you know, amazed that this is a society which so wants to be free that they’re willing to — you know, that there’s a level of violence that they tolerate.

    As Hank Hill would say, “Yup.”

  29. 29.

    ThymeZone

    An apparently drunk or demented man stood in front of cameras today and said the following, claiming to be the President of the United States.

    If a man stood in the subway station and said this stuff in a loud voice, I assume that he might be carted off as a dangerous vagrant.

    Whoever he is, he is clearly crazy and should be in an institution. I defy anyone to explain what he said or what point he thought he was making:

    Steve, we’re constantly changing tactics to achieve a strategic goal. Our strategic goal is a country which can defend itself, sustain itself, and govern itself. The strategic goal is to help this young democracy succeed in a world in which extremists are trying to intimidate rational people in order to topple moderate governments and to extend a caliphate.

    The stakes couldn’t be any higher, as I said earlier, in the world in which we live. There are extreme elements that use religion to achieve objectives. And they want us to leave, and they want us to — and they want to topple government. They want to extend an ideological caliphate that is — has no concept of liberty inherent in their beliefs. They want to control oil resources, and they want to plot and plan and attack us again. That’s their objectives. And so — and our strategic objective is to prevent them from doing that. And we’re constantly changing tactics to achieve that objective.

    And I appreciate Senator Warner going over there and taking a look. I want you to notice what he did say is, if the plan is now not working — the plan that’s in place isn’t working, America needs to adjust. I completely agree. That’s what I talk to General Casey about. I said, General, the Baghdad security plan is in its early implementation. I support you strongly, but if you come into this office and say we need to do something differently, I support you. If you need more troops, I support you. If you’re going to devise a new strategy, we’re with you, because I trust General Casey to make the judgments necessary to put the tactics in place to help us achieve an objective.

    And I appreciate Jimmy Baker willingness to — he and Lee Hamilton are putting this — have got a group they put together that I think was Congressman Wolf’s suggestion — or passing the law. We supported the idea. I think it’s good to have some of our elder statesmen — I hate to call Baker an elder statesmen — but to go over there and take a look, and to come back and make recommendations. Somebody said he said, well, you know, cut-and-run isn’t working. That’s not our policy. Our policy is to help this country succeed, because I understand the stakes. I’m going to repeat them one more time. As a matter of fact, I’m going to spend a lot of time repeating the stakes about what life is like in the Middle East.

    It is conceivable that there will be a world in which radical forms, extreme forms of religion fight each other for influence in the Middle East, in which they’ve got the capacity to use oil as an economic weapon. And when you throw in the mix a nuclear weapon in the hands of a sworn enemy of the United States, you begin to see an environment that would cause some later on in history to look back and say, how come they couldn’t see the problem? What happened to them in the year 2006? Why weren’t they able to see the problems now and deal with them before it came too late, Steve?

    And so Iraq is an important part of dealing with this problem. And my vow to the American people is I understand the stakes, and I understand what it would mean for us to leave before the job is done. And I look forward to listening how — what Jimmy Baker and Lee Hamilton say about how to get the job — I appreciate them working on this issue because I think they understand what I know, and the stakes are high.

    And the stakes are high when it comes to developing a Palestinian state so that Israel can live at peace. And the stakes are high when it comes to making sure the young democracy of Lebanon is able to fend off the extremists and radicals that want to crater that democracy.

    This is the real challenge of the 21st century. I like to tell people we’re in an ideological struggle. And it’s a struggle between extremists and radicals and people of moderation who want to simply live a peaceful life. And the calling of this country and in this century is whether or not we will help the forces of moderation prevail. That’s the fundamental question facing the United States of America — beyond my presidency. And you can tell I made my choice. And I made my choice because the most solemn duty of the American President and government is to protect this country from harm.

  30. 30.

    CaseyL

    What amazes me more than almost anything else is that there are people in this country who heard that speech and thought they were hearing pearls of statemanlike wisdom from the Greatest President in US History.

    And, no, they’re not all in assisted living facilities.

  31. 31.

    Steve

    how come they couldn’t see the problem? What happened to them in the year 2006? Why weren’t they able to see the problems now and deal with them before it came too late, Steve?

    I just don’t know, George. I just don’t know. But you sound a lot like this guy.

    The Time Traveler laughed again, but with more edge this time. “Yes, I know,” he said. “We all know . . . up there in the future which some of you will survive to see as free people. Civil liberties. In 2006 you still fear yourselves and your own institutions first, out of old habit. A not unworthy – if fatally misguided and terminally masochistic – paranoia. I will tell you right now, and this is not a prediction but a history lesson, some of your grandchildren will live in dhimmitude.”

    …He stood and set the Scotch glass back in its place on my sideboard. “How, we wonder in my time,” he said softly, “can you ignore the better part of a billion people who say aloud that they are willing to kill your children . . . or condone and celebrate the killing of them? And ignore them as they act on what they say? We do not understand you.”

    Good stuff, good stuff.

  32. 32.

    r€nato

    thanks for bringing up Ramesh Ponnuru in your Dinesh D’Souza example; Ponnuru also appeared on The Daily Show (a month or two prior to his Colbert appearance) and he flat out denied his book was talking about the Democratic Party.

    You absolutely nailed these two on their game; kudos.

  33. 33.

    r€nato

    I’d also like to add that D’Souza’s thesis implies that if we appease the terrorists by not indulging in our freedoms, they won’t attack us.

    Perhaps D’Souza’s next book could be about establishing a federal Department For Promotion Of Virtue And Prevention Of Vice.

  34. 34.

    Krista

    Did D’Souza copulate with pigs on his uncle’s pig farm?
    Did D’Souza tear newborn infants into pieces with his bare hands then eat the still-twitching body parts with a big grin on his face?
    Did D’Souza have sex with his mother after having sex with his father?
    Did D’Souza personally kill John F. Kennedy in Dallas?

    Hey, just askin’, y’know!

    – Badtux the Snarky Penguin

    Holy crap! Badtux! Where on earth did you disappear to? (And please don’t say “The South Pole”…)

  35. 35.

    SeesThroughIt

    How can Democrats logically be referred to as the “Party of Death”? Aren’t Democrats generally regarded as “anti-war”, “anti-gun”, “anti-death penalty”? Does being “pro-choice” trump everything else? Doesn’t support for “stem cell research to find cures for diseases that kill people” count for anything?

    Yes, but no Democrats attempted to give Terri Schiavo a bottle of water and a sandwich. So, you know…Party of Death.

  36. 36.

    HyperIon

    Holy crap! Badtux! Where on earth did you disappear to?

    isn’t it great when a poster re-appears after a long absence?
    (i’m mean most of the time..those recent Darrell free days were so nice.)

    did you see that Santa Claus (or his ghost at least) returned a couple of days ago?

    the Easter Bunny should be showing up soon.

  37. 37.

    Krista

    I’d also like to add that D’Souza’s thesis implies that if we appease the terrorists by not indulging in our freedoms, they won’t attack us.

    That does seem to be what he’s saying. So, the only way to stop the terrorists from attacking us is to be EXACTLY like them, with the sole exception of the deity to whom we pray.

  38. 38.

    Zifnab

    Ramesh wasn’t against the Democratic Party. I’m sure he was a very big Zell Miller/Joe Lieberman/Bill Nelson fan. And he’d probably have some very harsh words for Lincoln Chafee.

    But that’s the classic hard-right strategy. Talk out of both sides of your mouth. Say all the most short-sighted, mean-spirited, deranged things you can think of to your base. Democrats are all Nazis, the New York Times wants another 9/11, Gays in the Military are undermining the War in Iraq, Mark Foley was seduced by the leftist page program’s planted agents, … Then they turn around whenever they need to appear before a wide television audiance and start talking surprisingly sanely. Democrats aren’t all Nazis, but they do call Republicans Nazis. The New York Times doesn’t actively desire to see another terror attack, but they don’t seem interested in preventing one. Gays aren’t the only reason Iraq isn’t going well. And have we mentioned all the Dems who’ve molested children in the past 200 years?

  39. 39.

    Pb

    It is conceivable that there will be a world in which radical forms, extreme forms of religion fight each other for influence in the Middle East, in which they’ve got the capacity to use oil as an economic weapon.

    Say it ain’t so.

    This is the real challenge of the 21st century. I like to tell people we’re in an ideological struggle. And it’s a struggle between extremists and radicals and people of moderation who want to simply live a peaceful life. And the calling of this country and in this century is whether or not we will help the forces of moderation prevail.

    Yeah, I’m rooting for the Democrats too.

    That’s the fundamental question facing the United States of America—beyond my presidency. And you can tell I made my choice. And I made my choice because the most solemn duty of the American President and government is to protect this country from harm.

    You’re resigning?

  40. 40.

    Dinesh D'Souza's Mom

    Did D’Souza copulate with pigs on his uncle’s pig farm?
    Did D’Souza tear newborn infants into pieces with his bare hands then eat the still-twitching body parts with a big grin on his face?
    Did D’Souza have sex with his mother after having sex with his father?
    Did D’Souza personally kill John F. Kennedy in Dallas?

    Yes, No (he wore mittens), Not recently (but Tequila kills your memory), and No (it was the Cubans, but not Mark).

  41. 41.

    Richard Bottoms

    HARTFORD, Connecticut (AP) — Republican Rep. Christopher Shays defended the House speaker’s handling of a congressional page scandal, saying no one died like during the 1969 Chappaquiddick incident involving Democratic Sen. Ted Kennedy.

    Bastards

    Did I mention the Republicans are evil?

  42. 42.

    Mike P.

    “Followers will hear that Democrats are horrible evil awful people who want to eat your baby while the authors nakedly lie to the rest of us about what they “really” mean to say.”

    Funny, that’s the same thing I heard from folks in E. Tennessee in the early 60s about Catholics. Funny, because my family were the only Catholics I knew, and though my mother was known to serve escargot, we never had baby that I remember.

    Oddly enough, I guess “liberals” have taken over as the new Catholics (or any other boogeyman you could name from American history) to the rubes. Or have they just been added to the ever growing list?

  43. 43.

    Zifnab

    Oddly enough, I guess “liberals” have taken over as the new Catholics (or any other boogeyman you could name from American history) to the rubes. Or have they just been added to the ever growing list?

    Oh, I wouldn’t say anyone’s taking over. Go down to your local right-wing evangelical crazy-thon and I’m sure you’ll find some to tell you about how the Pope really the anti-Christ and Catholics are all going to hell for various forms of sacriledge. Makes you long for the unexpected days of the Spanish Inquisition.

  44. 44.

    Steve

    HARTFORD, Connecticut (AP)—Republican Rep. Christopher Shays defended the House speaker’s handling of a congressional page scandal, saying no one died like during the 1969 Chappaquiddick incident involving Democratic Sen. Ted Kennedy.

    Gerry Studds had sex with that page in 1973… and now Chappaquiddick. These guys are really, really, really flailing.

  45. 45.

    The Easter Bunny

    the Easter Bunny should be showing up soon.

    Look, I’m busy spreading freedom and democracy one bullet at a time, bitches. I don’t have time to hang out on blogs and bitch all day like you goddamn hippies. Blasting Canuckistanis into a fine mist of maple-scented goo is hard work.

    But don’t fret, moonbats. When we reflect on this period of history in the years to come, the War on Holiday Icons will look like a comma. A red, smeared comma, such as might be left by a lifeless, bloody hand thumping onto the virgin snows of Greater Canuckistan.

    I gotta go. Things to do, moose-worshippers to exterminate. You understand. Plus, if I’m on the Internet for too long, the Ghost of Santa starts bugging me to download some of that sicko elf porn he’s so fond of. The fat bastard can’t do it himself anymore due to the whole noncorporeal thing. So if any of you pencil-necked computer nerds know how to rig up a wireless network that can interface with the afterlife, let me know.

    Peeps, bitches!

  46. 46.

    Pb

    Gerry Studds had sex with that page in 1973… and now Chappaquiddick.

    How do you even respond to crap like that, or is there a fucking point to it at all? In other news, Dan Crane had sex with a page, and Strom Thurmond had a black baby etc., etc.

  48. 48.

    Zifnab

    Gerry Studds had sex with that page in 1973… and now Chappaquiddick.

    With all these startling revelations, one questions how the Democratic Party will fair in ’94. I hear the Republicans may be sitting on a real bombshell – and this is just a rumor, mind you – that former President Clinton may have been having an illicit affair with an working intern during his two terms in office. If that turns out to be true, and it’s leaked to the press… well… that could be the death blow to an approval rating already scraping the low 60s (bottom of the barrel, I know).

  50. 50.

    badtux

    Holy crap! Badtux! Where on earth did you disappear to? (And please don’t say “The South Pole”…)

    Oh, the usual. Changed jobs, wrote my first novel, that sort of thing. I just had to get away from the insanity for a while. Lost my snark for a while there. Which is bad news for a snarky penguin.

    Say, is it true that Republicans eat babies and love to laugh at pictures of starving children in Somalia while self-gratifying themselves? Hey, it’s just a question, no harm in asking questions, right? I mean, it’s not as if asking a question means I’m actually SAYING that Republicans eat babies and do hand-jobs to pictures of starving Somali children. I’m just askin’ a question! Like, is your mother a whore? See, just a question!

    – Badtux the Snarky Penguin

  51. 51.

    r€nato

    HARTFORD, Connecticut (AP)—Republican Rep. Christopher Shays defended the House speaker’s handling of a congressional page scandal, saying no one died like during the 1969 Chappaquiddick incident involving Democratic Sen. Ted Kennedy.

    shit that’s nothing. Grover Cleveland had an illegitimate child! Thomas Jefferson kept a slave as his mistress! And don’t get me going about Andrew Jackson…

  52. 52.

    Pb

    Republican Rep. Christopher Shays defended the House speaker’s handling of a congressional page scandal, saying no one died like _________

    like in Iraq?

  53. 53.

    Paddy O'Shea

    Breaking…Foley Didn’t resign because of the scandal!

    He resigned because polls showed that he would be
    coming in a little behind.

    More details as they come.

  54. 54.

    chopper

    He resigned because polls showed that he would be coming in a little behind.

    cue trombone: (wah waaaaah)

  55. 55.

    Zifnab

    Gerry Studds got re-elected.

    This just proves that the Republicans are a morally centered political party, while Democrats are out purely for political gain.

  56. 56.

    Fruitbat

    The joke I’ve been hearing, Paddy, runs like this:

    Why don’t Republicans use bookmarks?

    They’d rather just bend over a page.

  57. 57.

    chopper

    Why don’t Republicans use bookmarks?

    They’d rather just bend over a page.

    man, that’s bad. i love it.

  58. 58.

    jcricket

    I heard that John McCain had a jackalope with his Vietnamese captors. That’s why he actually stayed in Camp Ho Chi Minh for 5 years, not because he was a prisoner.

    It’s possible that’s also where he caught TEH GAY.

  61. 61.

    Andrew

    Gerry Studds got re-elected.

    This just proves that the Republicans are a morally centered political party, while Democrats are out purely for political gain.

    Or that Democrats are gentle, caring lovers, and that Republicans are bad at sex. Duh.

  65. 65.

    Sam Hutcheson

    It’s hard to reach the base with these books when many of your most ardent supporters live in double-wides, have a 4th grade reading level, and whose idea of “reading a book” is following a reciepe for meth.

    The Republican Not-Quite-So-Big-Anymore-And-Ever-Shrinkin tent isn’t composed solely of mouth-breathing trailer trash. In fact, most of the types of people you reference there are part of a much larger tent — the I-Dont-Bother-Voting party. Sure, what mouth-breathing trailer trash actually vote tend to vote to stamp out teh gay, so they’re pivotal in Rovian calculations, but if you focus solely on that wing of the nuts you lose track of the more dangerous wing — the suburban megachurch, “Prosperity Gospel” crowd. Those guys are educated, reasonably monied, rabid Boortz/Hannity listeners and the prime reason books like these stay on best seller lists and have their own special table displays in suburban Barnes and Nobles.

    s/

  66. 66.

    The Easter Bunny

    I totally heart The Easter Bunny.

    Thanks, pal, but no thanks. Not my bag, baby. Move to Massachusetts and call up Mark Foley if you’re into that. Leave us decent God-fearing Americans out of it.

    Besides, I’ve got my paws full “consoling” the widow Claus. In fact I consoled her three times last night. That chick is wicked freaky.

  67. 67.

    Zifnab

    the suburban megachurch, “Prosperity Gospel” crowd. Those guys are educated, reasonably monied, rabid Boortz/Hannity listeners and the prime reason books like these stay on best seller lists and have their own special table displays in suburban Barnes and Nobles.

    Shorter: Psychos with money

  68. 68.

    The Asshole Formerly Known as GOP4Me

    Besides, I’ve got my paws full “consoling” the widow Claus. In fact I consoled her three times last night. That chick is wicked freaky.

    Careful, Rabbit. It’s common knowledge that Mr. Claus got around a lot while he was still among us. Lord only knows what diseases you might be exposing yourself to right now.

    If nothing else, think of your own wives, and your 727 children.

  69. 69.

    JamesJr

    Read what Michael Scheurer says about why they hate us. It has little to do with right or left:

    http://www.buzzflash.com/interviews/05/01/int05001.html

    “I think the most basic thing for Americans to realize is that this war has nothing to do with who we are or what we believe, and everything to do with what we do in the Islamic world. Mr. Bush, Mr. Clinton, Mr. Bush before Mr. Clinton — they all identified Islamic militancy as being based on the hatred of Western democracy and freedom, and that’s clearly not the case. They surely don’t like our way of life, but very few people are willing to die to keep us from having primary elections or because we have freedom of the press.

    “Universally in the Muslim world, at least according to the most recent polling data, American foreign policy in several specific areas is hated by Muslims. Majorities of 85-90 percent are registered as hating or resenting American policies, towards our support for Israel, our ability to keep oil prices low, or low enough to satisfy Western consumers, our support for Arab tyrannies from Morocco to the Indian Ocean, our support for Putin in Chechnya. “

  70. 70.

    The Easter Bunny

    Careful, Rabbit. It’s common knowledge that Mr. Claus got around a lot while he was still among us. Lord only knows what diseases you might be exposing yourself to right now.

    If nothing else, think of your own wives, and your 727 children.

    Big deal. We’ve had a raging case of venereal spirochetosis going around our clan since the late 1600s. In fact, we introduced it to the Americas. Personally I blame that little ho Darlene, my 23rd wife.

    Trust me, once you’ve had the rabbit clap, human diseases are nothing to be scared of.

  71. 71.

    searp

    I do not believe that D’Souza even believes what he says; it is propaganda designed to demonize people who oppose the Bush evangelical cultists. The motivation must have been venal – a nobody can make a career in punditry simply by saying things that powerful people find useful.

    It is immoral and dastardly, but there are plenty of precendents, just not many in this country. I guess we’re breaking new ground in our march towards authoritarianism.

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