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You are here: Home / I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life.

I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life.

by John Cole|  February 19, 200710:55 am| 170 Comments

This post is in: General Stupidity

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Others prefer to think of Jesus as Bush:

Over the course of the next two years I think many of these Republicans will regret their decision of support for this Democrat resolution as they realize the extent of its impact. Their careers most likely will end in the same undignified manner as Judas ended his own life. Speaking for myself I can say this without hesitation, there are now seventeen pieces of silver in our party historically represented by red, and I promise you I shall not be colorblind in 08.

Watch out, Judas! Boobookitty is gonna come at you in 2008 like a spider monkey!

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170Comments

  1. 1.

    Zifnab

    February 19, 2007 at 11:02 am

    Over the course of the next two years I think many of these Republicans will regret their decision of support for this Democrat resolution as they realize the extent of its impact.

    “That’s right Republican’tvoteforthewaranymoreturncoatbastards, I’ll see you all in hell.
    …
    …
    From heaven.”

  2. 2.

    dslak

    February 19, 2007 at 11:05 am

    You know, it used to be snide to say that modern neo- and theocons thought that Bush was Jesus. Is there any snide, sarcastic, ironic yet otherwise astute observation that will not eventually be borne out as literally correct?

    It’s getting so that “Irony is dead” is no longer ironic.

  3. 3.

    yet another jeff

    February 19, 2007 at 11:07 am

    Is there nothing we can mock about the Uppercase “C” Conservatives that won’t appear prophetic later? Goddamn…

  4. 4.

    Pb

    February 19, 2007 at 11:08 am

    D’oh, not again. Insert obligatory comment about how RedState posters are being shallow, ignorant hypocrites. Start popcorn. Include link. etc.

  5. 5.

    zzyzx

    February 19, 2007 at 11:11 am

    Will Red State ever understand the difference between an employee and management? We’ve all had the experience of working hard on a project only to have the management decide that our work would be more productive elsewhere. It’s not that they don’t support me or didn’t think I was doing a good job, it’s that big picture of running the company meant that I should be working on something else.

  6. 6.

    Zifnab

    February 19, 2007 at 11:12 am

    I mean, if it makes you feel any better, not everyone compares Bush to Jesus. I mean, he’s a Christ-like figure, just not the one you usually look forward to.

  7. 7.

    Zombie Santa Claus

    February 19, 2007 at 11:13 am

    This clinches it for me. Sooner or later, the Redstate-style neocon conservatives will come out in favor of new alliances with AQ. I know it sounds fucking insane, but so are they. Just a matter of time; 5 years, maybe 10. Maybe less.

    When do we vote on the quote contest, John? Personally, I nominate Redstate’s entire post.

  8. 8.

    dslak

    February 19, 2007 at 11:15 am

    Looking at Pb’s link, I have to say that I’m surprised at just how consistent Pat Buchanan is in blaming US intervention for everything that’s wrong with the world.

  9. 9.

    Jay C

    February 19, 2007 at 11:22 am

    Ooooh, scary awful! All those Republican politicians had better watch out! Despite their name recognition, years of public service, political connections, and no-doubt-well-financed campaigns, they’re gonna be DOOMED! Because *gasp* RedState is going to say nasty things about them!

    That’s it: Game Over!: they all should just resign and retire right now; ‘cuz you know, when you’ve lost RedState, you’ve lost – well, maybe two dozen votes right there!

  10. 10.

    Tsulagi

    February 19, 2007 at 11:22 am

    BooBooKitty? You just know you should be racked with fear when you’re on the shit list of God’s self-designated vessel on Earth, someone named BooBooKitty.

  11. 11.

    Zombie Santa Claus

    February 19, 2007 at 11:23 am

    That’s it: Game Over!: they all should just resign and retire right now; ‘cuz you know, when you’ve lost RedState, you’ve lost – well, maybe two dozen votes right there!

    You’re not counting the spoofs. That’s at least another dozen or so, all of them the same 3 or 4 people.

  12. 12.

    Zombie Santa Claus

    February 19, 2007 at 11:24 am

    BooBooKitty? You just know you should be racked with fear when you’re on the shit list of God’s self-designated vessel on Earth, someone named BooBooKitty.

    There goes the cat-lover voting bloc.

  13. 13.

    Jake

    February 19, 2007 at 11:28 am

    Their careers most likely will end in the same undignified manner as Judas ended his own life.

    So to ride the dumbass analogy express all the way to the bottom of the cliff, does this mean Bush will wind up being crucified? By historians perhaps?

    Right, silly question really.

    Handles like “BooBookKitty” make me think of furries. Gah.

  14. 14.

    zzyzx

    February 19, 2007 at 11:29 am

    There goes the cat-lover voting bloc.

    More like there goes the fundamentalist Jay and Silent Bob fan joke if I guessed the origin correctly. That has to be at least 5 or 6 people.

  15. 15.

    zzyzx

    February 19, 2007 at 11:30 am

    urgh, I don’t know what the word “joke” was doing in my above post when I meant “bloc…”

  16. 16.

    Blue Neponset

    February 19, 2007 at 11:30 am

    Redstate is one diary closer to being permanently irrelevant.

  17. 17.

    Zifnab

    February 19, 2007 at 11:31 am

    So to ride the dumbass analogy express all the way to the bottom of the cliff, does this mean Bush will wind up being crucified?

    Does that make the Democrats the Jews or the Romans? Also, what does it say about the future state of Isreal? And if someone finally does put Kid Bush out of our misery, does that mean he’ll just be back again in three days?

  18. 18.

    Zombie Santa Claus

    February 19, 2007 at 11:38 am

    Does that make the Democrats the Jews or the Romans? Also, what does it say about the future state of Isreal? And if someone finally does put Kid Bush out of our misery, does that mean he’ll just be back again in three days?

    Pharisaic critics like Sy Hersh, Glenn Greenwald, Zuniga Markos Moulitsas, David Bowie (as Pontius Pilate in a brilliant cameo), and ThymeZone will crucify Bush at the polls, but on the third subsequent electoral cycle his reputation shall rise from the grave and ascend to Heaven. His followers will spread the gospel of pre-emptive military force throughout the world, although in practice it will often be misapplied. Centuries from now, sectarians will pre-emptively attack one another over trifling disagreements involving minute differences in interpretation of the Bush doctrine.

    That’s my prediction, anyway.

  19. 19.

    Tsulagi

    February 19, 2007 at 11:45 am

    Vengeance is mine sayeth the BooBooKitty. Lord, please bless the ammunition so that we may wreak the Wrath of BooBooKitty in your name.

    LOL. If the party of Bush ever regains from its retardation, one thing I would miss would be the comedy.

  20. 20.

    Zombie Santa Claus

    February 19, 2007 at 11:48 am

    LOL. If the party of Bush ever regains from its retardation, one thing I would miss would be the comedy.

    They’ve always had that, but for a while there it was confined to the state/local level. You’ll always be able to look for it down there, even if the national party regains some semblance of rationality.

  21. 21.

    teak111

    February 19, 2007 at 11:49 am

    Wow, last time I checked my new testiment, Jesus wasn’t starting wars on false pretenses, he was helping the poor and struggling. The Right grows increasingly desperate while the middle gains credibility with stuff like this. But must of all, the soft self-righiousness of the folks at RS is, in the end, sad. It signals a final detachment from mainstream political discussion and a confirmation of what we suspected all along. Its like when a freind or collegue begins to prostalitize, well you know its over. Goodbye.

  22. 22.

    Mary

    February 19, 2007 at 11:50 am

    I think this needs a “batshit” tag.

  23. 23.

    Jon H

    February 19, 2007 at 11:51 am

    “You know, it used to be snide to say that modern neo- and theocons thought that Bush was Jesus. Is there any snide, sarcastic, ironic yet otherwise astute observation that will not eventually be borne out as literally correct?”

    It’s only a matter of time before they start wearing beards and attempting the destruction of ‘blasphemous’ Mount Rushmore, thus fulfilling the snarky charaterization of being the Christian Taliban.

    “So to ride the dumbass analogy express all the way to the bottom of the cliff, does this mean Bush will wind up being crucified? By historians perhaps?”

    Just so long as he goes the fuck away afterward.

  24. 24.

    Zombie Santa Claus

    February 19, 2007 at 11:54 am

    Wow, last time I checked my new testiment, Jesus wasn’t starting wars on false pretenses, he was helping the poor and struggling.

    If memory serves, Jesus did say something like, “I come not to bring you peace, but to bring you the sword.” That line also implies that He brought the bunker buster, the depleted uranium ammunition, and the C-130 Hercules, among His many other miracles.

    Jesus was a Divider, not a Uniter. He split families, then His servant Bush reunited them while killing hundreds of thousands of Iraqi civilians in the process. For which He (Dubya, that is) was rewarded with electoral crucifixion.

  25. 25.

    Zombie Santa Claus

    February 19, 2007 at 11:55 am

    Just so long as he goes the fuck away afterward.

    He’ll be waiting for you all in Heaven- with a gun.

  26. 26.

    cleek

    February 19, 2007 at 11:56 am

    does that mean he’ll just be back again in three days?

    yeah, but he’ll be gone again a few days later: and more powerful than ever – like ObiWan, but stupid.

  27. 27.

    cleek

    February 19, 2007 at 11:57 am

    For which He (Dubya, that is) was rewarded with electoral crucifixion.

    i read that as “electrical crucifixion”. that’d be wild.

  28. 28.

    Punchy

    February 19, 2007 at 11:57 am

    For some reason, when you say “Jesus” and “Bush” in the same sentence, I think “Mary Magdalene”…

  29. 29.

    The Other Steve

    February 19, 2007 at 11:59 am

    We really need a government which is founded upon the foundational arguments of Hello Kitty.

  30. 30.

    Zombie Santa Claus

    February 19, 2007 at 12:01 pm

    i read that as “electrical crucifixion”. that’d be wild.

    I’m sure if the Romans had had modern science behind them, they’d have tried it.

    For some reason, when you say “Jesus” and “Bush” in the same sentence, I think “Mary Magdalene”…

    Well, isn’t that sort of like Mary Matalin, if she ran off with Clinton? (Then again, she DID marry Carville, so that’s kind of the same thing…)

    We really need a government which is founded upon the foundational arguments of Hello Kitty.

    That’s definitely what Plato was gunning for in “The Republic.” Some dead Greek dudes are with you on this one, TOS.

  31. 31.

    RSA

    February 19, 2007 at 12:04 pm

    Pharisaic critics like Sy Hersh, Glenn Greenwald, Zuniga Markos Moulitsas, David Bowie (as Pontius Pilate in a brilliant cameo), and ThymeZone will crucify Bush at the polls, but on the third subsequent electoral cycle his reputation shall rise from the grave and ascend to Heaven.

    With His worshippers pointing to His brush-clearing experience as the deciding factor in Bush’s ability to move the stone from the opening to His tomb.

    On Republicans as Judases, I’ve always (okay, probably only after reading Kazantzakis) thought of him as a sympathetic character. I mean, where would Christianity be today if no one had betrayed Jesus, and he’d died at 60 in a typhoid epidemic or something? Sometimes committing suicide is the honorable thing to do after having made a horrendous mistake. Hmm, I wonder if that scenario applies to any other political figures?

  32. 32.

    Krista

    February 19, 2007 at 12:05 pm

    Can I just say that this thread title really made my day?

  33. 33.

    Wilfred

    February 19, 2007 at 12:12 pm

    It’s only a matter of time before they start wearing beards and attempting the destruction of ‘blasphemous’ Mount Rushmore

    Great, funny image. Someitmes I think that half the people over at RS must be trolls involved in a ‘can you top this’ rhetoric contest.

  34. 34.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 12:14 pm

    Laugh all you want, leftists; attack the messenger and not the sensible content of the message. I don’t think BooBooKitty is its real name (although I could be wrong).

    Off topic alert:

    Did anyone see The Half Hour News Hour on Fox last night? My leftist cable outlet doesn’t carry Fox News Channel (only the Communist News Network), so I couldn’t see it live. :-(

    I bet it was really funny. The kind of show that scares the liberal elite would have to be good. With guest stars like Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter: how could it possibly go wrong? (“Watch this show or we’ll Bomb&Invade your country and convert you to Christianity”.) If only they could get Dennis Miller.

    I heard there was a Kim Jong-Il “No Fat Chicks” shirt bit and a good Marion Berry joke. And some ACLU commercials – “defending criminals from you since 1920.”
    I’m laughing already!

  35. 35.

    Jake

    February 19, 2007 at 12:16 pm

    i read that as “electrical crucifixion”. that’d be wild.

    The Abu Gharib treatment might be a fitting end for G. Agnus Dei Bush.

  36. 36.

    CaseyL

    February 19, 2007 at 12:20 pm

    Actually, John, the guy in the white suit doing the interpretive dance was Judas – in Jesus Christ, Superstar. He had do-wah chorus girls, too.

    BW is also headlining a speech by a Georgian congressnut equating global warming with eugenics.

    For some strange reason, they’re not also headlining the memo from that other Georgian congressnut that credits blames ancient Jewish scholars for discovering evolution, Big Bang cosmology, and basic orbital mechanics.

  37. 37.

    RandyH

    February 19, 2007 at 12:22 pm

    These people are nuts and many are reading that crazy drivel as a message from god becasue it sounds like it is coming from someone learned, even though these followers have very little understanding of the religion they profess to be the Ultimate Truth. It is truly scary to read this shit. Every society has their share of authoritarian nuts, in the case of the US, they are about 25-30% of the population, not a majority. But our authoritarian nuts have taken over a political party and are allowing that party to win some victories, so the rest of that party has gone along with their crazy allies. They call themselves conservatives but their leadership is anything but conservative. John Dean called their leaders Conservatives Without Conscience but it’s their army of authoritarian followers that enables these leaders. This pseudo-religious sounding propaganda shit works with these followers if it is not exposed to be nonsense, whish is hard to do because these people trust their leaders implicitly.

    The other 70-75% of America needs to educate themselves about how these people tick and put them back in the minority again. After Hitler and Mussolini succeeded in Germany and Italy, there has been a fair amount of study done on how this can happen in a free democratic society. I fear we’re just a few elections away from the same fate, if we’re not already there.

  38. 38.

    jenniebee

    February 19, 2007 at 12:29 pm

    Is Richard 23 a parody, a wingnut, some guy who’s gone off his meds, or all of the above? I can’t tell. At least with Darrell, you can tell.

  39. 39.

    Jay C

    February 19, 2007 at 12:33 pm

    Laugh all you want, leftists; attack the messenger and not the sensible content of the message

    Uhh, Dick: we certainly would deal with the “sensible content” of this, or any other RedState post – if there were any: as it is, what we have is over-wrought partisan drivel raggedly wrapped in cheapjack religious imagery: mockery is really all this claptrap deserves.

    I don’t think BooBooKitty is its real name (although I could be wrong).

    Actually (somewhat disappointingly) I think you are right. Thank you for this insight.

  40. 40.

    Tsulagi

    February 19, 2007 at 12:34 pm

    Hmmm…not seeing this post title in BooBooKitty’s rant anywhere in his post, I Googled the “I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life.” quote. Maybe it’s a well-known quote, but I’m not familiar with it. Sorry, Jesus.

    Anyway, the only place the quote stood out in the Google hits was number sixth going to a MySpace profile. A 24 year-old female in San Diego. If that’s you, BooBooKitty, not bad. You may be batshit loony, but you look like you’d be a fun date.

    Oh, and if the MTV gig doesn’t happen, good luck in your goal of becoming a gun carrying nice-not-mean crack dealer. Say hello to Haggard for us.

  41. 41.

    The Other Andrew

    February 19, 2007 at 12:40 pm

    If, by some glorious miracle, reality-based moderates ever gain control of the Republican party (it’ll probably be due to electoral reality, rather than any sudden epiphany), the RS folks are going to be even more fun to watch.

    Granted, I doubt this will be the last vote they’re angry about. I’m picturing early 2008–as the media slowly realizes that the surge didn’t work, the “run towards Bush and the theocons” plan has been replaced by “run away from Bush and the theocons” plan, and it’ll surely show up in the Congressional votes.

    We’ll probably have a muddled, flip-flopping Republican candidate in 2008, as he’ll be trying to appeal to a number of mutually-exclusive demographics, even within his own party. Immigration alone will require huge amounts of parsing, if he’s not to lose the xenophobes or Wall Street.

  42. 42.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 12:41 pm

    jenniebee, the joy of BJuice is that you don’t get to know. As a general rule, though, when a poster *here* starts sounding like he or she off his or her meds, the odds are very good that it’s spoof.

  43. 43.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 12:42 pm

    jenniebee, yes, it’s obvious that Darrell is a spoof. the left seems to enjoy arguing with carcicatures of conservatives. it makes them feel superior somehow.

  44. 44.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 12:44 pm

    Good catch, CaseyL — I had forgotten Judas’ suicide scene in the movie version of _John Cole, Superstar_. Great title, too, John.

  45. 45.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 12:46 pm

    Actually, here is a picture of Boo Boo Kitty.

  46. 46.

    cd6

    February 19, 2007 at 12:49 pm

    Awesome, just awesome.

  47. 47.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 12:49 pm

    Richard 23 is a genuine wingnut, and comedy writer for the Half Hour News Hour

  48. 48.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 12:52 pm

    TOA — do you really believe it’ll be early ’08 when the media narrative starts being “the surge didn’t work”? I’m already seeing a lot of “lots of people died in Baghdad despite the surge” stories.

  49. 49.

    tBone

    February 19, 2007 at 12:53 pm

    jenniebee, yes, it’s obvious that Darrell is a spoof. the left seems to enjoy arguing with carcicatures of conservatives. it makes them feel superior somehow.

    Yes, the Leftists like to pretend that they’re so ‘honest’ and ‘reality-based’ in their little circle-jerk echo chambers, but many/most Americans know just how dishonest to the core and out there they really are.

  50. 50.

    Andrew

    February 19, 2007 at 12:53 pm

    Richard 23 is a genuine wingnut, and comedy writer for the Half Hour News Hour

    This may be true. However, he is not necessarily aware of these facts.

  51. 51.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 12:55 pm

    I’m already seeing a lot of “lots of people died in Baghdad despite the surge” stories.

    Silly you. When there’s good news from Iraq, the surge is working. When there’s bad news from Iraq, the surge hasn’t really arrived yet.

  52. 52.

    Andrew

    February 19, 2007 at 12:55 pm

    lots of people died in Baghdad despite the surge

    Well moonbat, what do you expect after Pelosi emboldened the terrorists?

  53. 53.

    DougJ

    February 19, 2007 at 12:56 pm

    Their careers most likely will end in the same undignified manner as Judas ended his own life.

    I thought Judas was beheaded by mullahs.

  54. 54.

    tBone

    February 19, 2007 at 12:58 pm

    When there’s bad news from Iraq, the surge hasn’t really arrived is a success that hasn’t happened yet.

    If there aren’t ponies in Iraq, how do you leftards explain all of the whinnying coming from the glue factories there? Huh, moonbats?

  55. 55.

    ThymeZone

    February 19, 2007 at 1:01 pm

    Zuniga Markos Moulitsas, David Bowie (as Pontius Pilate in a brilliant cameo), and ThymeZone

    You put me in with those fellers?

    Wow. Can you also include Duke Ellington? Ko-Ko is the most phenomenal piece of big band music I ever heard, and I would really like to be associated with that.

    Thanks in advance, your pal,
    Herb.

  56. 56.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 1:01 pm

    Well moonbat, what do you expect after Pelosi emboldened the terrorists?

    If there aren’t ponies in Iraq, how do you leftards explain all of the whinnying coming from the glue factories there? Huh, moonbats?

    Oh my. There’s a danger that if we all do this at once people will think this is Free Republic.

  57. 57.

    DougJ

    February 19, 2007 at 1:05 pm

    Pharisaic critics like Sy Hersh, Glenn Greenwald, Zuniga Markos Moulitsas, David Bowie (as Pontius Pilate in a brilliant cameo), and ThymeZone will crucify Bush at the polls, but on the third subsequent electoral cycle his reputation shall rise from the grave and ascend to Heaven. His followers will spread the gospel of pre-emptive military force throughout the world, although in practice it will often be misapplied. Centuries from now, sectarians will pre-emptively attack one another over trifling disagreements involving minute differences in interpretation of the Bush doctrine.

    POTD

  58. 58.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 1:06 pm

    Their careers most likely will end in the same undignified manner as Judas ended his own life.

    Their careers’ bellies will split open, spilling their innards on the ground? I’ve heard of pork-barrel politics, sure, but never of pork-belly politics…

  59. 59.

    Krista

    February 19, 2007 at 1:11 pm

    Yes, the Leftists like to pretend that they’re so ‘honest’ and ‘reality-based’ in their little circle-jerk echo chambers, but many/most Americans know just how dishonest to the core and out there they really are.

    But at least we’re attractively lithe and nimble. We have to be, in order to climb up on rooftops to shout out our unhinged rantings.

  60. 60.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 1:14 pm

    We have to be, in order to climb up on rooftops to shout out our unhinged rantings.

    No, no, no. Get it right, will you? All you need to do is take the attic door off, and yell through the open space. The door taken off? That’s the “unhinged” part.

  61. 61.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 1:15 pm

    But at least we’re attractively lithe and nimble. We have to be, in order to climb up on rooftops to shout out our unhinged rantings.

    You wackjobs can actually be pretty funny sometimes! :-)

  62. 62.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 1:19 pm

    You wackjobs can actually be pretty funny sometimes! :-)

    As evidenced by the entire network of Comedy Central, with the exception of that joke-stealing fraud Mencia Holness.

  63. 63.

    tBone

    February 19, 2007 at 1:19 pm

    But at least we’re attractively lithe and nimble. We have to be, in order to climb up on rooftops to shout out our unhinged rantings.

    Lots of rooftops have stairway access, no litheness or nimbleness required. How ‘honest’ of you to pretend otherwise.

  64. 64.

    Andrew

    February 19, 2007 at 1:19 pm

    I’ve heard of pork-barrel politics, sure, but never of pork-belly politics…

    Really? I know you’re out of touch with American, moonbat, so you should go to the midwest sometime. I miss hearing the Chicago Merc pork belly pricing report.

  65. 65.

    Krista

    February 19, 2007 at 1:22 pm

    No, no, no. Get it right, will you? All you need to do is take the attic door off, and yell through the open space.

    No, we’re supposed to be shouting “from the rooftops”, which indicates that we would be physically located on the rooftop, not in the attic.

    Lazyarse. What kind of moonbat are you, anyway?

  66. 66.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 1:25 pm

    Lazyarse. What kind of moonbat are you, anyway?

    None of us have jobs. We’re all on welfare, and supported by the wingnuts.

  67. 67.

    Jake

    February 19, 2007 at 1:28 pm

    Judas Jesus (NTZYM) was beheaded by mullahs emboldened by Nancy Pelosi.

    Have a face full of truth lying lefty moonbat!

  68. 68.

    srv

    February 19, 2007 at 1:29 pm

    Did anyone notice this wonderful new PJM blog?

    Faster, Please!

    DougJ, ppGaz, please wander over and comment.

  69. 69.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 1:30 pm

    No Comedy Central on my socialist cable outlet either, Ted. Maybe Southpark is too dangerous. But they also don’t carry MSNBC, so I guess that’s a good thing. It’s an Olberman-free zone.

    I need to check: do I have any cable channels from my cable outlet?

  70. 70.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 1:30 pm

    Judas Jesus (NTZYM) was beheaded by mullahs emboldened by Nancy Pelosi.

  71. 71.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 1:31 pm

    Huh. The strike-throughs show up in the preview, but not in the post. Don’t know you people are doing it.

  72. 72.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 1:34 pm

    Maybe Southpark is too dangerous

    South Park is a national treasure. But they do have their occasional hypocrisies. For example, mocking the hell out of Scientology, and then mocking the hell out of Richard Dawkins for mocking all religion.

  73. 73.

    tBone

    February 19, 2007 at 1:35 pm

    Huh. The strike-throughs show up in the preview, but not in the post. Don’t know you people are doing it.

    You have to retag the striked portions if you copy and paste.

  74. 74.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 1:35 pm

    No, we’re supposed to be shouting “from the rooftops”, which indicates that we would be physically located on the rooftop, not in the attic.

    That depends on what meaning of “from the rooftops” you want to shout from the rooftops.

    As far as i can tell, there’s no part of the specification which states that we must be doing the shouting while standing on the rooftops. Instead, the shouting must happen in such a way that the sound comes from the rooftops. It seems to me that would mean using the roofing material itself as a giant loudspeaker, perhaps by electrostriction, or some such.

  75. 75.

    Punchy

    February 19, 2007 at 1:37 pm

    Is Richard 23 a parody, a wingnut, some guy who’s gone off his meds, or all of the above?

    Pretty sure Dick Numbers is one of us…spoofing his way into Moderate Centricalism.

    Uh Oh. Bush = Abe Lincoln??? No no no! Sorry…try Bush=George Washington

  76. 76.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 1:37 pm

    You have to retag the striked portions if you copy and paste.

    Thanks for the info. Anyway, I was trying to accuse Nancy Pelosi of beheading Jesus.

  77. 77.

    Zifnab

    February 19, 2007 at 1:38 pm

    South Park is a national treasure. But they do have their occasional hypocrisies. For example, mocking the hell out of Scientology, and then mocking the hell out of Richard Dawkins for mocking all religion.

    They give Al Gore alot of hell, and they like to mock Global Warming in particular. I’m really not sure what to make of all that except that I can’t agree with them all the time about everything, so I’ll just sit back and enjoy the show.

    I think they just like to go after whatever is looking particularly famous. The two guys are even quoted as saying, “If there’s anything we hate more than conservatives, its liberals”.

  78. 78.

    ThymeZone

    February 19, 2007 at 1:39 pm

    DougJ, ppGaz, please wander over and comment.

    Ledeen gives me a headache.

  79. 79.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 1:39 pm

    Only the text *as displayed in the browser* gets copied. To *bold* something, retag it surrounded by asterisks * bold * w/out the spaces, to strike it out, use dashes, to italicize it, use underscores. I think that equals signs probably double strike things: =double stricken= ?

  80. 80.

    tBone

    February 19, 2007 at 1:41 pm

    Anyway, I was trying to accuse Nancy Pelosi of beheading Jesus.

    I think that goes without saying. Duh.

  81. 81.

    Jake

    February 19, 2007 at 1:41 pm

    But they do have their occasional hypocrisies. For example, mocking the hell out of Scientology, and then mocking the hell out of Richard Dawkins for mocking all religion.

    Such is the joy of South Park. All sacred cows are slaughtered without mercy. If no sacred cows are available, Parker & Stone create one.

    “That’s not smog, that’s smug!”

  82. 82.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 1:43 pm

    They give Al Gore alot of hell, and they like to mock Global Warming in particular.

    Indeed. But even when I completely disagree with a subtle political message they’re making, I can’t stop laughing. Did they mock the global warming problem with the hybrid car episode? Sure. But did I find their renaming the Honda Prius the “Pious” absolutely hilarious? For some reason, yes.

  83. 83.

    DougJ

    February 19, 2007 at 1:44 pm

    Shit, I can’t get to Leeden’s blog. I’ll try again later.

  84. 84.

    The Other Steve

    February 19, 2007 at 1:48 pm

    South Park just likes to mock people. They don’t really care who, they just hit everybody where they are trying to be most serious.

  85. 85.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 1:50 pm

    Did they mock the global warming problem with the hybrid car episode? Sure. But did I find their renaming the Honda Prius the “Pious” absolutely hilarious? For some reason, yes

    When I got my new car, I found that the vanity plate “Toyonda” was already taken.

  86. 86.

    Punchy

    February 19, 2007 at 1:51 pm

    Anyway, I was trying to accuse Nancy Pelosi of beheading Jesus.

    Reading this thread, and this comment in particular, Mr. Cole must be proud that his entire blog has now become a cesspool of halarious spoof. Job well done.

    I can see Jesus in a three-way with Pelosi and Rosie O’Donnell, and a supply of batteries and Kleenex to outfit an army. That reminds me….lunchtime!

  87. 87.

    cleek

    February 19, 2007 at 1:51 pm

    Did anyone notice this wonderful new PJM blog?

    holy fuck. now that guy’s unhinged.

  88. 88.

    Krista

    February 19, 2007 at 1:56 pm

    Reading this thread, and this comment in particular, Mr. Cole must be proud that his entire blog has now become a cesspool of halarious spoof. Job well done.

    When he looks at the comments over at RedState, I’m sure he’s doubly grateful for all of his commenters…even those who are a bit of a thorn in his side.

  89. 89.

    The Other Steve

    February 19, 2007 at 1:56 pm

    I am launching my new campaign.

    Hillary Clinton for Secretary of War!

  90. 90.

    J. Michael Neal

    February 19, 2007 at 1:56 pm

    If memory serves, Jesus did say something like, “I come not to bring you peace, but to bring you the sword.” That line also implies that He brought the bunker buster, the depleted uranium ammunition, and the C-130 Hercules, among His many other miracles.

    These are probably the people that actually bought into The Matrix as a Christ parable.

    “Guns. We need more guns.”
    – Jesus

  91. 91.

    The Other Steve

    February 19, 2007 at 1:58 pm

    When he looks at the comments over at RedState, I’m sure he’s doubly grateful for all of his commenters…even those who are a bit of a thorn in his side.

    Don’t pay any attention to Krista. She’s a mysogynist who hates America as much as she hates women, troops and Jesus.

  92. 92.

    Rusty Shackleford

    February 19, 2007 at 1:59 pm

    My favorite:

    “Kill ’em all and let My Father sort them out.”
    — Jesus H. Christ

  93. 93.

    tBone

    February 19, 2007 at 2:00 pm

    I am launching my new campaign.

    Hillary Clinton for Secretary of War!

    I hear Hillary ‘Kratos’ Clinton is a playable character in God of War 2.

  94. 94.

    Jake

    February 19, 2007 at 2:03 pm

    These are probably the people that actually bought into The Matrix as a Christ parable.

    If Keanu Reeves is Jesus heaven must be bloody boring and the heavenly host has all of the emotional range of a deck chair. But then I hate Reeves as much as Krista hates women, soldiers, children and baby ducklings.

  95. 95.

    Krista

    February 19, 2007 at 2:06 pm

    But then I hate Reeves as much as Krista hates women, soldiers, Jesus, children, apple pie and baby ducklings anything.

    Edited for accuracy.

  96. 96.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 2:08 pm

    George Washington hated America too. Don Young said it was in Washington’s memoirs.

  97. 97.

    Pb

    February 19, 2007 at 2:08 pm

    If South Park has any ‘political bias’, it’s libertarian–or perhaps Glibertarian–and therefore, anti-authoritarian and/or pro-capitalist, which doesn’t necessarily mesh–go figure.

  98. 98.

    ThymeZone

    February 19, 2007 at 2:15 pm

    If South Park has any ‘political bias’, it’s libertarian—or perhaps Glibertarian—and therefore, anti-authoritarian and/or pro-capitalist, which doesn’t necessarily mesh—go figure.

    Actually, it’s RatingfriendlyContrarian.

  99. 99.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 2:15 pm

    As far a Keanu Reeves is concerned, he was actually pretty good in A Scanner Darkly. But then it was an adaptation of the excellent Philip K Dick novel. So maybe I’m biased. I wouldn’t have chosen Reeves myself, but the rest of the cast is really good.

    Since nobody wants to admit to watching the Fox News version of The Daily Show, I went technoratiing for reactions. I found this site: Half-Hour News Hour Aid. It’s pretty funny. The 23 1/2 post where Jack Bauer interrogates a writer for the show is a decent parody.

  100. 100.

    Jon H

    February 19, 2007 at 2:16 pm

    Zombie writes:”If memory serves, Jesus did say something like, “I come not to bring you peace, but to bring you the sword.” That line also implies that He brought the bunker buster, the depleted uranium ammunition, and the C-130 Hercules, among His many other miracles.”

    I recall reading an op/ed in the New York times (I think) where the author actually argued that Jesus chasing money changers out of the Temple means it’s okay to use violence.

    Somehow I don’t think the moneychangers were turned into exsanguinated metabolically-challenged giblets.

  101. 101.

    Jon H

    February 19, 2007 at 2:17 pm

    “Anyway, I was trying to accuse Nancy Pelosi of beheading Jesus.”

    with her thighs.

    You are now freaking out.

  102. 102.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 2:19 pm

    “Anyway, I was trying to accuse Nancy Pelosi of beheading Jesus.”

    with her thighs.

    Mmmmm. Famke Janssen.

  103. 103.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 2:21 pm

    “Anyway, I was trying to accuse Nancy Pelosi of beheading Jesus.”

    _with her thighs._

    I’m suddenly thinking of the Balloon Juice version of the fortune cookie game:

    I was trying to accuse Nancy Pelosi of beheading Jesus

    _in bed_.

    I hate Reeves as much as Krista hates women, soldiers, children and baby ducklings

    _in bed_.

    Hmmm…

  104. 104.

    Jake

    February 19, 2007 at 2:21 pm

    Somehow I don’t think the moneychangers were turned into exsanguinated metabolically-challenged giblets.

    Only because Jesus lacked the technology and funding. If he’d had a grenade launcher he would have used that baby. Instead he had to make due with a knotted rope. This is why we should give all of our money…er…tithe freely to the local branch of Flocks “R” Us. So Jesus can have the proper armaments when He comes back.

  105. 105.

    Jake

    February 19, 2007 at 2:24 pm

    When I got my new car,

    _in bed_

    No, no, no. Get it right, will you?

    _in bed_

    demandingmondian.

  106. 106.

    Punchy

    February 19, 2007 at 2:31 pm

    “Anyway, I was trying to accuse Nancy Pelosi of beheading Jesus.”

    with her thighs

    Hands down…not even close…the BEST thing I’ve read all day. I may laugh at this for another 15 minutes….

  107. 107.

    Perry Como

    February 19, 2007 at 2:31 pm

    BooBooKitty is watching you masturbate.

  108. 108.

    Face

    February 19, 2007 at 2:38 pm

    BooBooKitty is watching you masturbate

    .

    Actually, BooBooKitty sounds like something I’d be watching/paying for while solo sexing…

  109. 109.

    Punchy

    February 19, 2007 at 2:41 pm

    OT Alert:

    Did you guys know this? From this article, here’s the shocker:

    Though DHS has the authority to waive any U.S. law—including environmental laws—in the name of homeland security, the process has been stalled,

    Really? Is this true? They can ignore ANY law? So…is this their wiretapping loophole?

  110. 110.

    Earth's Inner Child

    February 19, 2007 at 2:46 pm

    Crucifixion, please.

  111. 111.

    pharniel

    February 19, 2007 at 2:52 pm

    Perry Como Says:

    BooBooKitty is watching you masturbate.

    Am I getting hits on my webcam advertising agent for that?
    Because if so it and i should do a team up, maybe get alittle ‘who can go longer’ action going.

    what? Pappa needs a new xbox 360 for halo 3 baby.

  112. 112.

    Pinacacci

    February 19, 2007 at 3:11 pm

    Dang y’all,

    the Ice-dancing Jesus is from Talladega Nights, one of the funniest movies nobody’s ever seen.

    Seriously, way funnier than you think.

  113. 113.

    Bubblegum Tate

    February 19, 2007 at 3:12 pm

    Can I just say that this thread title really made my day?

    You and me both, Krista. That whole scene is hilarious, and I even rented the DVD just to see if there were any outtakes from that scene. There were, and they were great. John C. Reilly is the man.

  114. 114.

    tBone

    February 19, 2007 at 3:27 pm

    BooBooKitty is watching you masturbate.

    This brings a whole disturbing new dimension to that old truism, “God kills a kitten each time you masturbate.”

  115. 115.

    Krista

    February 19, 2007 at 3:33 pm

    BooBooKitty is watching you masturbate.

    That’s okay, because evidently, so are Jesus, God and Santa Claus.

  116. 116.

    Zifnab

    February 19, 2007 at 3:34 pm

    Though DHS has the authority to waive any U.S. law—including environmental laws—in the name of homeland security, the process has been stalled,

    So all the pedophilia spilling out of the DHS was actually in defense of the homeland. It all makes perfect sense now. We’ll molest them over here so they don’t get molested over there.

  117. 117.

    The Easter Bunny

    February 19, 2007 at 3:45 pm

    That’s okay, because evidently, so are Jesus, God and Santa Claus.

    Damn it! What I do in the privacy of my own warren is my business, you fat, undead bastard.

  118. 118.

    Bruce Moomaw

    February 19, 2007 at 4:01 pm

    Ordinarily I wouldn’t give a damn about the views of someone calling themselves “boobookitty” — except that I’ve heard that Bush-as-Jesus-and-his-enemies-as-Judas line before from more prominent Christian Rightists. After David Kuo came out with the news that the White House was (gasp!) not entirely sincere in its support for “faith-based initiatives”, the Washington Post ran a piece last October on the reaction of prominent Christian Rightists to him, in which — sure enough — comparisons of Bush to Jesus and Kuo to Judas turned up.

    It really is a shame that we can’t arrange for the world’s religious lunatics to simply exterminate each other and leave the rest of us alone.

  119. 119.

    ThymeZone

    February 19, 2007 at 4:07 pm

    What I do in the privacy of my own warren is my business

    That’s pretty assertive for an animal that drops shit raisins involuntarily 24 hours a day.

  120. 120.

    The Easter Bunny

    February 19, 2007 at 4:14 pm

    That’s pretty assertive for an animal that drops shit raisins involuntarily 24 hours a day.

    What did you think was in those “special” Easter baskets I always left for you when you were a kid? Yeah, I remember you, punk.

  121. 121.

    ThymeZone

    February 19, 2007 at 4:15 pm

    What did you think was in those “special” Easter baskets I always left for you when you were a kid?

    I guess that gives “Sun Maid” a whole new meaning, pellet boy.

  122. 122.

    whatsleft

    February 19, 2007 at 4:19 pm

    ooooooh nooooo

  123. 123.

    whatsleft

    February 19, 2007 at 4:20 pm

    (frantically tries to scrub dusty taste of Easter Raisinet memories from tongue)

    *Preview is my friend

  124. 124.

    Jon H

    February 19, 2007 at 4:28 pm

    “BooBooKitty is watching you, masturbating.”

    Fixed.

  125. 125.

    Jon H

    February 19, 2007 at 4:29 pm

    “I guess that gives “Sun Maid” a whole new meaning, pellet boy.”

    Hell, the actual way they make golden raisins isn’t terribly appetizing either.

  126. 126.

    Punchy

    February 19, 2007 at 4:32 pm

    “BooBooKitty is watching you, masturbating.”

    Nice. God bless the comma.

    And John McCain.

  127. 127.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 4:46 pm

    Hell, the actual way they make golden raisins isn’t terribly appetizing either.

    Don’t you dare!

  128. 128.

    Zifnab

    February 19, 2007 at 4:51 pm

    “I guess that gives “Sun Maid” a whole new meaning, pellet boy.”

    I just assumed it refered to a particularly well-tanned agriculture wench.

  129. 129.

    Earth's Inner Child

    February 19, 2007 at 4:54 pm

    And John McCain.

    For some reason, this made me think of those one-worded t-shirts that people wear — the ones that read “dork” or “slut” or some other self-depricating nonsense — and that I have yet to see one that reads “liar”.

  130. 130.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 5:26 pm

    Wow, what a great President to have on President’s Day!

    Bush compares Revolutionary, terror wars:

    “Today, we’re fighting a new war to defend our liberty and our people and our way of life,” said Bush, standing in front of Washington’s home and above a mostly frozen Potomac River.

    “And as we work to advance the cause of freedom around the world, we remember that the father of our country believed that the freedoms we secured in our revolution were not meant for Americans alone.”

    No kidding. It’s funny, Americans understand instinctively that the war on terror is similar to America’s own revolutionary war. But where the left and right differ are which side they support.

    The Michael Moore wing of the Democrat party (redundant, obviously) has already called the terrorists “freedom fighters.” Good Americans know better. Those fighting for the spread of freedom and liberty are our brave troops. Let freedom reign!

    Hat tip: Blogs for Bush.

  131. 131.

    ThymeZone

    February 19, 2007 at 5:28 pm

    Americans understand instinctively that the war on terror is similar to America’s own revolutionary war.

    Yes, and right here on these pages our own Tall Dave once argued that Iraq was like revolutionary America.

    I shit you not, Dick Two-Three.

  132. 132.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 5:29 pm

    OMG, this is so funny!

    “I feel right at home here. After all, this is the home of the first George W. I thank President Washington for welcoming us today. He doesn’t look a day over 275 years old,” Bush said to laughter.

    What a great man!

  133. 133.

    Jake

    February 19, 2007 at 5:33 pm

    I thank President Washington for welcoming us today.

    The White House has no comment on rumors that the walls wept blood and a strange voice repeatedly snarled “Get. Out.” during the President’s visit.

  134. 134.

    Punchy

    February 19, 2007 at 5:41 pm

    Ah….McCain….Johnny Boy….

    Nov. 2006:

    “While Secretary Rumsfeld and I have had our differences, he deserves Americans’ respect and gratitude for his many years of public service,” McCain said last year when Rumsfeld stepped down.

    Today:

    “I think that Donald Rumsfeld will go down in history as one of the worst secretaries of defense in history,” McCain said to applause.

    Can this guy be consistent on ANYTHING? Seriously, is there anything this guy won’t flip-flop on?

  135. 135.

    Krista

    February 19, 2007 at 5:54 pm

    I guess that gives “Sun Maid” a whole new meaning, pellet boy.

    I ate Raisin Bran this morning. I now feel very unclean.

  136. 136.

    Ted

    February 19, 2007 at 5:58 pm

    The Michael Moore wing of the Democrat party (redundant, obviously)

    The Pat Robertson wing of the Republic party thinks gays and lesbians are to blame for 9/11/01. Of course, that’s redundant, obviously.

  137. 137.

    Jon H

    February 19, 2007 at 6:12 pm

    R23: “Don’t you dare!” [re: golden raisins]

    I’ll just say it involves soaking them in lye then subjecting them to sulfurous fumes.

  138. 138.

    Richard 23

    February 19, 2007 at 6:25 pm

    I’ll just say it involves….

    Waaaahhhh! Now don’t tell me how sausage is made or what’s in liverwurst. And don’t even mention headcheese. This time I mean it!

  139. 139.

    ThymeZone

    February 19, 2007 at 6:29 pm

    Richard, just let me say, your new persona is a hit.

    Congrats. Fine job.

  140. 140.

    AkaDad

    February 19, 2007 at 7:08 pm

    We have to be, in order to climb up on rooftops to shout out our unhinged rantings.

    Unhinged liberals like Krista are why we need to nuke Canada so she has no rooftop to rant from.

  141. 141.

    Krista

    February 19, 2007 at 7:25 pm

    Unhinged liberals like Krista are why we need to nuke Canada so she has no rooftop to rant from. from which to rant.

    If you’re advocating nuking me anyway, I might as well do something to earn it…in for a penny, in for a pound, and all that.

  142. 142.

    AkaDad

    February 19, 2007 at 7:34 pm

    I might as well do something to earn it…in for a penny, in for a pound, and all that.

    LOL

    When I’m President you will regret that. =]

  143. 143.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    February 19, 2007 at 8:25 pm

    “I feel right at home here. After all, this is the home of the first George W. I thank President Washington for welcoming us today. He doesn’t look a day over 275 years old,” Bush said to laughter.

    It’s true! He IS the Messiah! This proves it!

    “Verily, I say unto you, before George Washington was, I AM.”

  144. 144.

    jake

    February 19, 2007 at 8:27 pm

    Waaaahhhh! Now don’t tell me how sausage is made or what’s in liverwurst. And don’t even mention headcheese. This time I mean it!

    You would have liked my grandmother. She worked for the US Dept. of Agriculture. I’ll just say eating hot dogs, hamburgers, sausage etc. in front of that woman was a test of one’s intestinal fortitude.

    Send me $50,000 in unmarked bills or I’ll tell you all about it.

  145. 145.

    Andrew

    February 19, 2007 at 8:51 pm

    I don’t know how y’all expect to build up any resistance to mad cow disease if you’re not willing to eat some of the more ridiculous animal bits.

  146. 146.

    demimondian

    February 19, 2007 at 8:57 pm

    Unhinged liberals like Krista are why we need to nuke Canada so she has no rooftop -to rant from.- from which to rant.

    This is the kind of arrant pedantry -up with which I shall not put- down with which I, like, totally am.

  147. 147.

    Otto Man

    February 19, 2007 at 9:55 pm

    Dear Lord, that is some incredibly powerful insanity over there.

    Wow. I mean, wow.

  148. 148.

    The Other Steve

    February 19, 2007 at 10:21 pm

    Another sad statistic is played out.

    Rural America bear scars from Iraq war

    Across the nation, small towns are quietly bearing a disproportionate burden of war. Nearly half of the more than 3,100 U.S. military fatalities in Iraq have come from towns like McKeesport, where fewer than 25,000 people live, according to an analysis by The Associated Press. One in five hailed from hometowns of less than 5,000.

    Many of the hometowns of the war dead aren’t just small, they’re poor. The AP analysis found that nearly three quarters of those killed in Iraq came from towns where the per capita income was below the national average. More than half came from towns where the percentage of people living in poverty topped the national average.

  149. 149.

    SPIIDERWEB™

    February 19, 2007 at 10:36 pm

    Its not impossible Judas Iscariot did Jesus’ bidding.

    During the 1970s, a Coptic papyrus [4] was discovered near Beni Masah, Egypt. This has been translated and appears to be a text from the 2nd century A.D. describing the story of Jesus’s death from the viewpoint of Judas. The conclusion of the text refers (in Coptic) to the text as “the Gospel of Judas” (Euangelion Ioudas).

    According to a 2006 translation of the manuscript of the text, it is apparently a Gnostic account of an arrangement between Jesus and Judas, who in this telling are Gnostically enlightened beings, with Jesus asking Judas to turn him in to the Romans to help Jesus finish his appointed task from God.

  150. 150.

    Zifnab

    February 19, 2007 at 10:51 pm

    According to a 2006 translation of the manuscript of the text, it is apparently a Gnostic account of an arrangement between Jesus and Judas, who in this telling are Gnostically enlightened beings, with Jesus asking Judas to turn him in to the Romans to help Jesus finish his appointed task from God.

    I was waiting for someone to mention this, but I couldn’t find a good way to roll it into a Bush joke.

  151. 151.

    Perry Como

    February 19, 2007 at 11:07 pm

    DoughBob LoadPants and the Washington Post – A one act play

    Dana Priest: The conditions at Walter Reed hospital are deplorable.
    DoughBob LoadPants: Unlike me, Dana Priest has an agenda. We should have Geraldo look into this. Anyone know where I put my Cheetos?
    Gleen Greenwald: DoughBob is a hack.
    DoughBob LoadPants: I just got an email from someone I ran into once when I was selling Linda Tripp tapes on EBay. The emailer said that the people in Walter Reed are whiners. I concur. btw, still looking my for Cheetos.
    Dana Priest: “Walter Reed Army Medical Center began repairs yesterday on Building 18, a former hotel that is used to house outpatients recuperating from injuries suffered in Iraq and Afghanistan and that has been plagued with mold, leaky plumbing and a broken elevator.

    The facility’s commander, Maj. Gen. George W. Weightman, said Army staff members inspected each of the 54 rooms at the building and discovered that outstanding repair orders for half the rooms had not been completed. He said that mold removal had begun on several rooms and that holes in ceilings, stained carpets and leaking faucets were being fixed.”
    DoughBob LoadPants: Seriously guys. I have no idea where my Cheetos are. This is a major problem. A reader just sent me a copy of the 1/2 Hour News Hour and I need to watch it before my bedtime. Where the hell are my Cheetos!?!?
    Michael Ledeen: Hey guys, does anyone know Ahmadinejad’s number? I have some great IEDs to sell him. Fresh off the press from Iraq. My buddy Ghorbanifar can get a bulk deal on them.
    DoughBob LoadPants: [glaring at Michael Ledeen] HAVE YOU SEEN MY CHEETOS!?
    Michael Ledeen: [points to KLo]
    Dana Priest: …

    [curtain]

  152. 152.

    Zifnab

    February 19, 2007 at 11:37 pm

    *applause*

  153. 153.

    Andrew

    February 20, 2007 at 12:05 am

    City of God is a fucking incredible movie.

  154. 154.

    Punchy

    February 20, 2007 at 12:08 am

    with Jesus asking Judas to turn him in to the Romans to help Jesus finish his appointed task from God.

    Wow…Jesus had some issues…

  155. 155.

    Richard 23

    February 20, 2007 at 12:26 am

    I’m not sure who DoughBob LoadPants is, but s/he sure does like Cheetos! LOL.

    Here an excerpt from 23 1/2 (more at the link):

    JACK BAUER: Who are you working for?

    COMEDY WRITER: I told you–I’m a comedy writer for The Half-Hour News Hour.

    JACK BAUER: Don’t lie to me! I need to know who you’re working for!

    COMEDY WRITER: I’m not lying–I’m not even joking.

    JACK BAUER: I’ll say. Okay–if you’re a comedy writer, say something funny.

    COMEDY WRITER: …uhhh…gay penguins!

    JACK BAUER: [produces Taser] *ZZZZAP*

    COMEDY WRITER: Owww! Why’d you do that?

    JACK BAUER: I said ‘”funny.” Gay penguins aren’t funny. Besides, it’s been done to death.

    COMEDY WRITER: Okay, okay. Funny…let’s see…Marion Barry!

    JACK BAUER: That guy who writes for the Miami Herald? Okay–he’s funny.

    COMEDY WRITER: No, not Dave Barry–Marion Barry, former DC mayor.

    JACK BAUER: *ZZZZZZAP*

    COMEDY WRITER: OWWW!!!–Stop–that hurts!

    JACK BAUER: Chuck Berry is funnier than Marion Barry. I’m going to ask you again–who do you work for?

    COMEDY WRITER: I told you already.

    JACK BAUER: *BLAM* [shoots comedy writer in leg] Al Franken sent you, didn’t he?

    COMEDY WRITER: OWWWW!!!!! I… I….I don’t know Al Franken…

    and it goes on from there…

  156. 156.

    Chuck Butcher

    February 20, 2007 at 12:46 am

    Not to pick nits, but I thought the moonbats were in the belfry and crazy Aunt Alice was in the attic? Being a roofer, among other nail bending endeavors, I have shouted from a roof top, but I’m not nearly schizoid enough to manage plural tops.

    made my day

  157. 157.

    Richard 23

    February 20, 2007 at 1:13 am

    Good news! The America Show is back with Episode 4: “Jesus and Mordy.”

    “The View” meets “The Daily Show” and takes a right turn. Republican Girls Gone Wild.

    Find past and future episodes at the aptly named “TalentGoldmine.”

  158. 158.

    Perry Como

    February 20, 2007 at 2:01 am

    Good news! The America Show is back with Episode 4: “Jesus and Mordy.”

    The America Show did for comedy what Kevin Federline did for music.

  159. 159.

    bago

    February 20, 2007 at 2:51 am

    The Redcoats are coming! Blackwater is coming!

  160. 160.

    Richard 23

    February 20, 2007 at 3:39 am

    Yeah, Perry! K-Fed rulz!

  161. 161.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    February 20, 2007 at 6:31 am

    I was waiting for someone to mention this, but I couldn’t find a good way to roll it into a Bush joke.

    On the surface, it looked as if Bush’s trusted acolyte Rove betrayed him by allowing the Pharisees to win Congressional control in 2006. But in reality, such a step was necessary, for if the Democrats couldn’t crucify Bush for their sins, Bush couldn’t sacrifice His reputation and resurrect it on the third electoral cycle that the glorious gospel of pre-emptive warfare might illuminate the world and embolden the democratic instincts of humanity.

    So, although Rove has betrayed Bush for 17 Republicans with hearts of tarnished silver, without Rove’s treason the Bush Doctrine would cleave unto the dust and perish.

  162. 162.

    jake

    February 20, 2007 at 6:42 am

    I was waiting for someone to mention this, but I couldn’t find a good way to roll it into a Bush joke.

    Uh, Jesus asked Judas to bushwhack him?

    Sorry.

  163. 163.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    February 20, 2007 at 6:56 am

    OT but here’s a book I think we should all get ahold of.

    Toys are the Communist’s means of teaching kids to embrace Satan, you know.

  164. 164.

    jake

    February 20, 2007 at 7:37 am

    He-Man, a major concern of Mr. Phillips…

    Someone get Ted sHaggard’s Supreme Heterosexual Integration Team on the phone!

  165. 165.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    February 20, 2007 at 9:34 am

    Someone get Ted sHaggard’s Supreme Heterosexual Integration Team on the phone!

    It makes you think, doesn’t it: how many future homosexuals has the He-Man toy created?

    I’ve got to admit, Phillips also makes a good point here:

    In his early chapter “A Startling Discovery” Mr. Phillips describes the horror of discovering a Skeletor toy – “The first toy I saw was one called Skeletor, which was holding a ram’s head staff in its hand. I immediately recognized the ram’s head as an occult symbol; I decided to buy the toy. I went back to the house and opened the wrapping around the toy. Inside was a little comic book, which I read with astonishment. “How could any sane person sell this to a child?”

    He-Man is the origin of Wiccanism AND homosexuality. If only people had had the prescience to nip it in the bud in the early 80s, America might still be on the path of righteousness. IOW, no 9/11 attacks and no Hurricane Katrina; God would’ve averted them, or inflicted them on a more sinful people instead. The Dutch, perhaps, or the Kazakhstanis.

  166. 166.

    Richard 23

    February 20, 2007 at 9:46 am

    I’m glad I skipped over the gay-inducing He-Man cartoon show. I was too busy watching wholesome My Little Pony and Care Bears.

    Oh and tentacle rape hentai porn.

  167. 167.

    Zifnab

    February 20, 2007 at 10:06 am

    “How could any sane person sell this to a child?”

    I had action figure Moses and Joshua toys who fought Superman and Spiderman to the death on the top of my dresser.

    Also, funny story, neither Moses nor Joshua had wing-wongs. I’ve got a wing-wong. Does that mean I’m not being like my Biblical idols? Well… only one way to fix that. Where’s mommy’s steak knife?

  168. 168.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    February 20, 2007 at 10:23 am

    I’m glad I skipped over the gay-inducing He-Man cartoon show. I was too busy watching wholesome My Little Pony and Care Bears.

    Those are almost as bad, friend. The Evil One is devious, and operates on layers within layers of deceit.

    Oh and tentacle rape hentai porn.

    Well, at least you didn’t grow up gay.

    I had action figure Moses and Joshua toys who fought Superman and Spiderman to the death on the top of my dresser.

    “I kick ass for the Lord!”

    Also, funny story, neither Moses nor Joshua had wing-wongs. I’ve got a wing-wong. Does that mean I’m not being like my Biblical idols? Well… only one way to fix that. Where’s mommy’s steak knife?

    “And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

    “And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.”

    -Matthew 5:29-30

  169. 169.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    February 20, 2007 at 10:24 am

    Fucking blasphemous slash-line. It’s Matthew, Chapter 5, verses 29 and 30.

    Praise the Lord and pass the Ammunition.

  170. 170.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    February 20, 2007 at 10:37 am

    I just found this out about He-Man:

    There is a long-standing (yet still unproven) urban legend about the so-called “Conan toy line”. The story is that the Mattel Toy Company started to make some Conan action figures, but after viewing the film, the executives realized that they couldn’t afford to be associated with a film with such graphic sex and violence. They gave their doll blonde hair, called him “He-man”, and thus created “He-Man and the Masters of the Universe” (1983).

    If this is true, then that RINO Ah-nuld is really in league with Satan!

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