I hope you all are enjoying your holidays, and remember to eat some PEEPS.
And speaking of food, two new grocery discoveries. Hola Fruta is the best strawberry sherbet I have ever had, and Bolthouse orange juice is simply amazing.
At any rate, happy Easter.
craigie
I dyed a bunny, but it still laid white eggs. What am I doing wrong?
demimondian
You’ve got a bunny that lays eggs? Here’s a hint: don’t keep the eggs — sell the damned rabbit!
craigie
I can’t – it was a gift from the leprechaun
Punchy
Mr. Cole? San Fran. Just make the move. We fully understand and support you. You’ll enjoy it much more that Redneck Dub-Vee. You can enjoy the arts, the museums, the coast, and those bulging muscles so much easier under the shadow of the Bay Bridge.
The Easter Bunny
Peeps, bitches! Peeeeeeeeps.
Fuck yeah I’m durnk, you would be too if you had to haul your fluffy-ass tail around the world tomorrow delivering eggs to ungrateful little talking monkeys. And wha do I get for it? Nothin. That fat ass Santa gets all the press. So he delivers presents to all the “good” little boys and girls. BFD. He has a North Pole sweatshop full of elves to help him. All I have is a bunch of spongy sugar-coated freeloaders whose major talent is getting their heads bitten off by 6-year-olds.
And what has St. Lard done to help win the War on the War on Christmas? He got blown into a billion chunks of blubber, thas what. Real helpful, fatty.
Now if you’ll escuse me, I gotta hit the crapper. Careful opening the chocolate eggs tomorrow, bitches.
Fruitbat Jones
PoTNight? Hope to see your sweet ass tomorrow. I dont want the responsibility of hiding these eggs. That’s your job, slacker, and you better not leave the brown eggs again.
incontrolados
I’ll try this again since it’s a holiday. And I won’t even get impatient. Since it’s a holiday. Let my comment sit in moderation for MINUTES on end. I’ll be patient.
It’s a HOLIDAY. I’ll be nice.
I don’t normally use caps and I don’t normally comment. Just have a bit to say every once in a while. Can I come in?
A joke, a cartoon, is that the price of admission?
I got nothin’.
incontrolados
Ok, Kenyans love Kenny Rogers. Really, it’s true.
Dave
Peeps simply have to be the single most disgusting, sad excuse for a food (are they actually food?) ever invented. I’m still not convinced that it’s not some dude’s cat’s hairballs that he covers in yellow dye every year and sells on the open market.
jake
Nah, hairballs are used to make those nasty ass “coconut” nest things.
You don’t want to know about the peeps.
dslak
The latest in Peeps research. Interestingly enough, Peeps can smoke without suffering any adverse side effects.
Zifnab
They’re marshmallows covered in colored sugar. What on god’s green earth could possibly be taster for the mouth or more horribly destructive to one’s teeth.
CJ
What you all don’t realize is that Satan Claws (undead or not, you be the judge) controls the Easter Bunny. It’s all a conspiracy.
demimondian
Fine — rent it out on a renewable 99-year basis. It all comes to the same thing in the end.
skip
At the risk of confounding the groundlings, Sir Thomas Browne was wrong. I saw the sun dance this morning, from through the dogwood blossums.
You can look it up.
Punchy
Weren’t we supposed to attack and bomb Iran on April 6, according to some Russian general? Apparently, too much Stoli puts the kibosh on effective codebreaking.
Happy Easter
This one has been around the internets a few times.
What does the Easter bunny do on the other 364 days of the year?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OiZjxwfRgxg
CaseyL
It was a Russian General? Aren’t they still on the old calendar, the one that’s about 10 days off everyone else’s?
That explains it, then!
The attack in Iran will be 10 days from now –
– or it should’ve happened 10 days ago. Um, right around the time of the UK Sailor imbroglio.
Maybe there was ‘supposed to be’ an attack on Iran – until Blair told Bush to shut up and butt out.
Rome Again
Well, mundane astrologists are predicting sometime around the end of April, they aren’t saying WAR exactly, they’re saying a very high tensioned time.
jake
We were, but the President put on his flight suit and beat on his XtraBulgee Codpiece (TM), which scared the I-ranians into handing over the British soldiers.
Actually, the only place I saw that story was in some sort of internet journal of dubious provenance.
Dug Jay
This global warming is bloody cold.
Krista
Easter Bunny – if you’re responsible for Cadbury Mini Eggs, then I am alternating between blessing you (for how delicious they are), and cursing you (for the same reason).
By the way, glad to hear you’re okay. This guy must have just been your body double.
Grrr
Sanctum Peter CotiumDeus ri hunnam hippitus hoppitus reus domineIn suus via torreiumLepis en ei sanctumhippitus hoppitus reus domine
Amen.
Grrr
Jesus, what a crappy HTML preview parser. Oh well.
Geoduck
I prefer Odwalla juice myself. Overpriced, but so tasty..
Perry Como
Chocolate covered peeps.
Ned R.
Meantime I celebrated the holiday with a new tradition — seeing Grindhouse with some friends. (I intend to make this an annual event, not because it’s the greatest movie ever per se, it’s just the type of thing that one should make an annual event on Easter.)
jake
Naked is good too, although I feel a tad embarassed buying something with NAKED stamped on the side. (Excuse me, does this come in a plain brown wrapper?) And like Bolthouse it is cheap at Costco.
The Easter Bunny
Nah, that was me. No harm done though, just a peppering of the neck, torso, and snout. Happens all the time. Dick was actually providing security for me in case any Canuckistanis infiltrated the proceedings. Can’t blame the guy for mistaking those kids for terrorists, or for hitting me by mistake.
In retrospect, maybe I shouldn’t have forced him to finish those last eight Jello shots I bought him, or that final pitcher of Guiness. But hey, water under the bridge. We’re going elk hunting with Scalia next month. Should be fun.
Pb
What, that? That’s just my birthday. Happens every year…
demimondian
with injected cherry liqueur filling.
Punchy
wow, my birthday too. (yeah, I’m doing this again just to be an ass. Us Tauri are an ornery bunch).
By the way Easter Bunny….didn’t see you lay any eggs this year. Heard a rumor you haven’t laid anything in years. Including eggs.
Pb
Punchy,
Yeah, now that you mention it, they’re probably seeing yours instead of mine. You troublemaker, you. :)
demimondian
Oh, TEB certainly layed an egg with the demi-offspring. He brought…Peeps. [shudder] The eldest of the demi-offspring replicated the peep-fear experiment, leading the youngest to discover a remarkable peep-aging experiment — put a fresh, squishy Peep in a freezer, and it quickly ages, acquiring wrinkles and losing it’s youthful flexibility. The youngest wanted me to replicate the experiment in more extreme conditions, but I couldn’t find any LN3.
Maybe next year.
Punchy
Liquid azide? Trying to kill the demi-nis?
yet another jeff
nobody’s mentioned Peeps Research?
Pb
yet another jeff,
Sorry, you’re late on that one, dslak beat you to it.
grumpy realist
Ah yes, all the wonderful things one can do with liquid nitrogen….
And in the great example of experimental science, here’s the link to nailing jello to a wall:
http://www.myscienceproject.org/j-wall.html
demimondian
Thanks, GR. I can’t tell you how grateful I am.
Now I’m going to spend the whole day thinking about how best to reinforce Jell-O(R) Brand gelatin dessert so that it can be nailed to a wall.
Face
I’m with Demi. It’s all I can think about. I think the reinforced mixes was cheating. One has to utilize out-of-the-box Jello for success. Perhaps a chilled board instead of a wooden one?
jcricket
Anyone get the sense that Bush found all his ideologically wedded, incompetent, Regent-university trained loyalists in a leftover box of Peeps from last year’s Easter?
Throw in the resignation of the top 4 people under US Attorney Rachel Palouse (who quite possibly has committed a couple of federal crimes, it seems) and it’s enough to make me think we’ve found the second coming of oversight.
Although I am getting very tired of typing “this is yet another perfect example ideology trumping competence – and the core symptom of everything wrong with the modern-day GOP and the Bush presidency”. John – Can you add a “button” to the HTML options so I don’t have to keep retyping that?
Call it “Bush-sucks-mega-dittos” or something.