This oughta be good. What do you think the wingnuts can possibly say about Bill Clinton that’s worse than the mud they slung while he was in office? I mean, he’s already been accused of dealing drugs, fathering out-of-wedlock babies, murdering Vince Foster, murdering Ron Brown, and being a paid agent of the Chinese government, just to name a few. What the hell is left? Secret meetings with Osama on 9/10?
Teh Gay.
KCinDC
Coulter has already done that one, John.
Mike
Do I violate the policy by noting that blogs and publications which have traded in all of the above deplore TNR’s lack of fact-checking?
chopper
i dunno. bill has already been smeared six ways from sunday (god, that sounds like a really bad porn title) and he’s still far more popular than george bush.
cui bono?
Jake
He smuggled his lover bin Laden into Pakistan in a saxaphone case, thus forcing George Bush to invade Iraq.
He attempted to build a time machine so he could go back in time and abort the Baby Jesus.
He was the “stocky black guy” who frightened Bob Allen into offering him 20 bucks and a BJ.
Davebo
He thinks orange juice is just for breakfast.
Jay B.
Teh Gay? Not even a winger could believe that guy is gay. They have too much vested in the alternative.
If anything, it’ll have to be something like Troy McClure said, “Gay? I wish! If I were gay there’d be no problem! No, what I have is a romantic abnormality, one so unbelievable that it must be hidden from the public at all costs.”
Then again, Bill could get it on with a team of pack mules on Pay Per View and I’m not sure more than a handful of people would blink. The guy has literally been described as Satan for 15 years now, so what could possibly change people’s perception of him one way or another?
capelza
“A group of former intelligence officers”?
That was the only “interesting” thing in it.
It implies some failure of Bill’s in the WOT/GSAVE I would assume.
But again, as has been noted Hillary would know, more than anyone in politics now how to survive smear campaigns.
taodon
He’s Baptist.
KCinDC
Jay, you underestimate the ability of wingnuts to believe incompatible smears (and of the “liberal” media to give a platform to the smearers).
myiq2xu
Howzabout: He is secretly a Republican?
Jay B.
KCinDC,
No doubt — but when the right already believes Bill is a sex fiend on a de Sade/John Wayne Gacy level, they already “know” he’s a rapist who’d fuck a goat. “Latent homosexuality” just can’t leave a mark after the government-bought pron of the Starr Report not to mention the ten-year jihad of Dan Burton, Bill Bennett and Regerney Press.
There’s no doubt the “press” will never let go of the Clenis (and if Hitlery gets the nomination, the Clintoris), but the country isn’t much interested.
Rusty Shackleford
Is this smear campaign going to feature a group of retired intelligence officers who with a book and appearances in a series of political ads listing the charges of Clinton’s negligence as well as a hour special that goes into depth about how Clinton wouldn’t let them protect America from terrorists?
myiq2xu
He is building nucular weapons in his secret volcano fortress?
He murdered Anna Nicole?
He’s Scott Beauchamp’s real father?
He’s Keyser Soze?
I’ve got it – HE FIRED THE US ATTORNEYS!
rawshark
They’ll believe anything as long as its told to them by the right people. They have preconcieved notions, it makes them putty.
Tim F.
Path To 9/11, the director’s cut.
Tsulagi
Pretty much.
That was the hidden plan all along of the evil, liberal gay agenda headed by Bill Clinton. You can attack them.
But they’re not to be confused with the conservative gay agenda that works for Jesus like Ted Haggard and Matt Sanchez outing naughty soldiers like Scott Beauchamp. Attacking Ted or Matt makes you a homophobe, even though they’re not really homos. There’s a book with the rules somewhere.
Kirk Spencer
If I were the Clinton’s, I’d be breaking out the good stuff in celebration.
Remember that there are TWO elections to win. In the first, only Democrats matter. And a lot of Democrats…
remember and resent Swift Boat…
still think of Bill as a great president…
still think the GOP treatment of Bill was a jealousy-driven mix of lies and hypocrisy.
If Hillary can handle this attack it reinforces the image of “what can they do that they haven’t already done”. As a bonus, it will shows she’s competent and capable of not only pissing off the GOP but negating their bullshit. Or so it will seem in the eyes of many DEM voters.
There’s also the hidden message — “The GOP is so scared of one and ONLY one Dem Candidate that they’ve broken out the big guns. Do you want to choose an untested candidate, or someone who can suppress the
282634 percenters?”Mike S
It would almost be worth supporting her in the primaries just to watch the GOP completely implode in the publics eyes. The GOP has no problem with Bush and the war but they are still upset with Bill’s penis?
RSA
No matter how distant you think a parallel universe is in which a famous conservative says something insane, you inevitably discover that it’s our universe:
It won’t leave a mark, though; you’re right about that, I think.
Keith
Serious questions need to be asked: Did Bill Clinton fake his heart surgery to improve his poll numbers? Did he get paid to make speeches on or around any 9/11 anniversary? Does *he* know how to fly airliners, and if so, were any of his flight school classmates foreigners?
tBone
Well, let’s see.
We already know he murdered some teenagers with a train in Arkansas. And later, of course, he murdered Ron Brown and staged an airplane crash to cover it up.
I’m guessing they’ve finally uncovered the incident where he raped an Amish woman and then trampled her to death with a Clydesdale.
Or maybe the time when he beat a hobo to death with his own arm and then lit him on fire and ran over him with a bus to cover it up.
Or maybe it was one of the other skeletons in his closet. And I don’t mean that metaphorically. I mean that Clinton has a vast walk-in closet full of human skeletons and semen-stained clothing.
RSA
Applying the lessons from the Beachamp incident: She was a Mennonite, which means that your story is entirely wrong!
cleek
another affair
tBone
My apologies. Through the Weekly Standard, anonymous sources have informed me that I signed a full recantation.
John S.
I prefer Clagina. It just rolls off the tongue better.
grumpy realist
I remember watching the whole Lewinsky kerfluffle from far, far away and being extremely amused by the different reactions I ran across in different countries:
The French: So, M’sieur Clinton has une petite amie? Et alors?
Latin America: Why does your president only have one mistress? Doesn’t sound like much of a man….
Japan: But what will this do to the economy?
(I used to regularly explain American politics to my co-workers: “Don’t think of it as a process making any sense. Think three-ring circus.” )
(Oh, and you’ve never seen anything until you’ve seen a Japanese commentator trying to make sense of Ross Perot.)
incontrolados
Hey, he was just playing along. Or was sleep walking or playing or something.
(I haven’t read the source, but projection seems to be the thing.)
Tulkinghorn
Clinton really was a Manchurian candidate, but was never activated by the North Koreans because the code phrase was written on a pizza, and Jonah Goldberg ate it.
incontrolados
k, now that I read it, I can tell you with some certainty it will be Bob Perry (real estate big dude in Texas) and T. Boone Pickens (oil big guy), and one other rich guy from Texas. They set up a “swiftboatsimulator” with money last fall.
If I need to find the link, I will.
Tulkinghorn
T. Boone Pickens recently made the observation that he had made more money in the six years of Bush’s administration than he had made to date in his entire lifetime. So this is not much of a surprise.
ConservativelyLiberal
Well, in my non-professional opinion (who cares?!), I think that the clintoris is closer to the tongue. Thus it has a better chance of rolling off of it. Just saying…
Fruitbat
Clintoris, Clagina, tomayto, tomahto. By the time the tongue is involved, chances are you don’t want either to roll off of it.
I’m sorry. My first comment in months, and it is largely unnecessary.
Johnny Pez
Except that it’s no secret. Bill Clinton was the very model of an Eisenhower Republican. That’s
the reasonone of the many, many reasons the Republicans hated him so much.mclaren
What’s left?
C’mon! Get real. For starters, Bill Clinton bailed out of the first 757 just before it hit the first tower on 9/11. Bill Clinton was the missing hijacker! Haven’t you seen the photos?
Then we move on to the fact that Hillary is a blood-sucking insectoid alien from Zeta Reticuli. There’s a _reason_ why those nude Yale photos were all destroyed! They showed her green reptilian skin…
Seriously, you people can’t believe the level of lies that will come vomiting out of the Joe McCarthy smear machine on the right wing once this campaign starts gearing up. The Swift Boaters were a mild warm-up compared to what will be unleasehed against Bill & Hillary. They have a satanic candle made of baby fat in their office safe, Hillary secretly gave birth to an infant she sacrificed to the devil in a Black Mass in order to become president, Bill is in contact with the Nazi refugees lurking inside the huge caves in Antarctica and is waiting to give them a signal to come out and take over the earth… Oh, and during his presidency, Bill Clinton had secret undeground entrances built for all the yetis to use when they snuck into the White House to conspire with him to convert us all to Rosicrucianism.
And that will be mild stuff, the attack ads offically endorsed by Romney’s capaign manager. The third party smears will be much, much worse.
jake
And then there’s a CLANGina. A bold man has brass balls. A bold woman has a clangina.
fecapult
Expect to see this on Faux news within a week?
Mr Furious
Clinton killed Foster and Brown so he could have gay sex with their dead bodies!
And Hillary watched!
AkaDad
All those missing white women are in Clinton’s basement/torture dungeon.
Mike
The way I heard it, he raped the Clydesdale…
conumbdrum
My question: who the hell do the Repubs want to win the Dem nomination!? Someone has to take it, after all.
Seems to me that Obama is the candidate they should worry most about, actually. The race-baiting that the GOP would unleash against him (they can’t help themselves… it’s in the DNA) would repulse every non-racist in the nation and render the Repubs even more toxic to black voters than ever. Yes, that is possible.
That’s as good a reason to root for Obama as any… watching the GOP knock themselves out to attack the man for being a N-e-g-r-o without seeming like knuckle-dragging Ku Kluxers should provide a nonstop source of electoral amusement. Think last year’s “Harold Ford craves white women” attack ad writ large.
BIRDZILLA
Dont forget clinton is also guilty of TREASON and RAPE