1.) There is a Klan rally in Alabama, to protest the Klan:
Apparently not all Klans are created equal.
Days after the Cullman City Council approved a permit request by the National Knights of the Ku Klux Klan to assemble in front of the courthouse, members of the Alabama Ku Klux Klan announced their group’s intent to be there as well.
The Times received an email from Ken Mier, who identified himself as an investigator for the Alabama Klan and the national office of the Ku Klux Klan LLC. Mier said his group is different from the Church of the National Knights and is against that organization’s protest tactics.
“There are many differences between our organizations that can obviously be noticed,” he said in his correspondence. “We are the real Klan and descendants of the original non-violent Klans-people.”
The Klan is just so misunderstood.
2.) Another “not-gay” Republican with an anti-gay voting record caught in, surprise, a gay-sex scandal:
State Rep. Richard Curtis, R-La Center, admitted to having sex with a man he met at an adult video store in Spokane last week, according to a police report released Tuesday afternoon.
The police report offers a damning and far different version of events from the brief account Curtis gave to The Columbian Monday, one that seems likely to threaten Curtis’ political future.
The report is filled with graphic details of an encounter that began at a porn store on a Spokane Valley strip and concluded miles away in Curtis’ room at the city’s poshest hotel.
The police report contains an account of how Curtis allegedly donned women’s clothing, red stockings and a black sequined lingerie top before engaging in a sex act at the store. He continued to wear them throughout the night under his clothing.
As someone noted before, the Conservative Kink bar has been set so high, that if you aren’t found dangling from a ceiling beam wearing a minimum of two wetsuits with a dildo shoved up your butt, you’re considered kind of vanilla.
3.) You are going to just love the name of the Republican running to fill DeLay’s seat:
Pasadena Mayor John Manlove resigned his post of six years Monday to join a crowded field seeking the Republican nomination for the congressional seat once held by former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay.
Manlove, 54, who owns his own marketing and advertising firm, said he had been encouraged for months by supporters to seek the seat now held by U.S. Rep. Nick Lampson.
Apparently, the GOP was unsuccessful convincing Tom Iraqwarfailures and Jim Fiscalmess to run, so they had to settle for Manlove.
From the comments, a possible slogan which may play well with the values party: “Hi! My name is John Manlove, and I am interested in Nick Lampson’s seat.”
Consider this a “wide” and open thread.
cleek
what awesome bumper stickers that will make:
Vote Republican. Vote Manlove.
Republicans for Manlove.
Manlove 08. Real Republican Values
i want one !
Zifnab
Hahaha. I have never been prouder to be a resident of TX-22.
r€nato
I am not gay!
Peter Johnson
Funny you never talk about the Democrats with sexual improprieties. Like Barney Frank:
maxbaer (not the original)
He sounds more honest than Delay, anyway.
r€nato
bwahahahahaha!
who needs The Onion anymore?
r€nato
geez, does this really need to be explained, Tiny Johnson?
Mr Furious
The GOP couldn’t convince Bruce Nambla to run?
maxbaer (not the original)
Is there a statute of limitations on Barney Frank’s indescretions? It was 18 years ago!
RSA
One thing I find entertaining about the Klan is that they will never be able to escape the subliterate spelling of their organization’s name. It’s like a flashing red sign to intelligent people (the repugnant views of the organization aside): “You want me to join a group that spells “clan” with a K?”
r€nato
Nope. Jerry Goatsex convinced the RNC he’d be a better candidate.
r€nato
Just one more Republican forcibly outed thanks to being busted for public sex, and we can reconstitute the Village People.
r€nato
I’m surprised Rep. Curtis didn’t claim he was just playing dress-up for Halloween.
Punchy
Is Tim F. dead, or is Perfessor Cole so damn fast with the n3wz stories that Ole’ Timmy is flummoxed? 10 fer 10 yesterday, John?
John S.
Because Barney Frank is openly gay and doesn’t attempt to draft anti-gay legislation or lecture people on morality.
It isn’t about being teh gay, it’s about teh hypocrisy you fucking moron.
Peter Johnson
So in the liberals’ world having the misfortune to be named Manlove is worse than running a gay prostitution ring out of your Congressional office. What a strange world it must be. That explains a lot.
r€nato
I hope you’ll show us what Manlove’s campaign signs look like!
gypsy howell
Manlove, huh?
Funny, I don’t usually think of “truth in advertising” when I think of the GOP.
Krista
Oh for the love of Mike. You’ve been told this before, so stop thinking with your Johnson, Peter.
Lawmaker who pushes anti-gay legislation. Lawmaker who then is discovered to have engaged in gay sex. Think about it.
If Foley, Curtis, Lord of the Stance, and the rest of these guys (I’ve lost count!) had not been vehemently pushing ANTI-gay legislation, then their gay encounters would likely result in reactions ranging from empathy to indifference.
It ain’t a gay thing, it’s a hypocrisy thing. If Tipper Gore had been caught singing backup vocals on 2 Live Crew albums, it would have been just as hilarious.
Woodrow "asim" Jarvis Hill
Peter, with respect — you’re talking about an issue that’s nearly 2 decades old. It’d be different if Cole was talking about some crap that a GOP guy did in the Reagan era.
And having read the link, and the link from the link, perhaps the people at Newsbusters fail to recall how the media tip-toed around the Foley scandal at it’s inception, in a similar way as to how they describe the Frank scandal. It’s OK; I hate recalling Foley, too.
r€nato
All Republicans who are not gay, please acknowledge it by saying, “I am not gay!”
Oh, wait, that won’t work…
OK, all Republicans who are not gay, please acknowledge it by tapping your foot.
Oh, wait…*
*gleefully stolen from comments at TBogg
Notorious P.A.T.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but Barney Frank committed sexual indiscretions with other adults, while Mark Foley attempted to seduce children, right?
r€nato
other Republicans who declined to run for mayor of Pasadena:
Steve Gerbilstuffer
Sheila Rugmunch
Max Wetsuits
Manuel Stimulation
Pete Fisting
Frank Circlejerk
K.Y. Greasemeup
Cleveland Steamer
…must work… must work… must work…
Heywood Jablomy
Based on this incandescently stupid remark, I think Peter should run for GOP officeholder under the name Peter Dumfuck. (Oh Peter — the manlove ring was run by frank’s boyfriend, not frank, out of frank’s livingroom, not cong. office, and frank didn’t know about it till the guy got caught. dur.)
Also, GOP has decided to challenge Barack Obama in Ill. with a female candidate named Ima Islamofascist.
r€nato
teens, actually, and nobody ever proved that he had sex with them, AFAIK. I think his M.O. was to come on to them, but wait until they were 18 and no longer pages cuz that made it “OK” in his mind.
r€nato
I believe this merely serves to reinforce my point. </jonah>
r€nato
there was supposed to be a closing /jonah tag at the end there…
chopper
the real question is, how is this glenn greenwald’s fault?
r€nato
Tiny Johnson, you’re losing your edge. You haven’t yet blamed Clinton!
Davebo
The Mayor of Pasadena?
Look, I understand that district 22 needs congressional representation. But the freakin mayor of Pasadena? Surely there’s some nutbag from Sugarland or perhaps a reasonable citizen of Clear Lake to run.
Billy K
The Tim F. is a lie. There is no Tim F. There never was. Tim F. was just John’s alter-ego. Now that john doesn’t mind being called a Clinton-lovin’, Commie-supportin’, Troop-hatin’ Liberal, there is no further need for Tim F.
Vlad
Straighten up, Republicans!
Jake
“Honestly, I was on my way to a showing of RHPS!”
I wonder if the other guy is a minority. Curtis could have used the Bob Allen “Didn’t want to be a statistic” defense:
“He was a pretty stocky black guy so I dressed up like a woman in hopes he wouldn’t mug me, then once I was dressed up as a woman I realized he might rape me…”
And Crusty Curtis is claiming he was blackmailed? Let’s see how that works.
1. Help create an environment which equates being gay with baby rape and dog humping.
2. Have sex with guys. Thanks to your hard work your voters think the end-all and be-all of gays is indiscriminate sex with people with matching plumbing.
3. At this point, by your definition, you’re gay.
4. At this point, by your definition, you’re scum of the earth.
5. Whine when anyone tries to exploit that little discrepancy.
Boo. Frickin. Hoo.
Tsulagi
A definite Yep. With the double wetsuited dildoed preacher, it’s clear these guys are on a mission to shove that Overton window on Republican kink. Now if there were another Foley sounding like a retarded Austin Powers in IMs to teenage boys, you’d get a yawn. Gay Old Perverts becoming Gay Old Passe.
Socons who have sex with their wives is rapidly becoming a vanishing demographic. So in a way their obsession pushing family values for others makes some sense. They’re afraid of dying out.
Billy K
How about…all Republicans who are not gay stop having sex with men? Too difficult?
jcricket
Living in the state where the not-gay, but crossdressing/gay-porn-renting/gay-prostitute-using legislator is from, I saw this gem in a comment thread (about the only place wingers outnumber liberals in WA state):
So this is the new excuse I expect to see popping up everywhere a Republican is caught doing something they legislate against (having an affair – male or female, masturbating in public, purchasing a blow job from a gay prostitute, renting gay porn, etc.). Essentially it’s:
I think the Republican party is determined to shrink their “tent” until you can fit it in a bathtub (and you know what comes after that, right Mr. Norquist?).
r€nato
what are you, some kind of pervert?
r€nato
I knew this was going to get posted somewhere, I just thought that Tiny Johnson would post it here first.
Heywood Jablomy
Notice how they always say ‘I am not gay’ rather than, say, ‘I am not a pervert.’ In Dickheadia it’s worse to be ‘gay’ than a freaking-sicko-bathroom-riverdancing-cross-dressing-industrial-strength perv. GOP talking point of day: Repeat ‘I am not a gay IslamoFascict illegal alien’ all day on Fox News.
These people are unmoored.
Faux News
Sorry guys, but I’m with Peter Johnson on this. I mean come on now. Men of Balloon Juice, who amongst us has not offerred another man they just met $100 for gas money only to have it accidently end up as anal sex? These things just happen. You know?
Peter, you know EXACTLY what I’m talking about.
jcricket
I think the Republicans actually have strategies here:
1) Right-wing blogosphere – yell so loudly and act so stupidly all the time that you lower expectations and make it impossible for everyone to document all your stupidity (meaning that some of what you say will just get passed on with no comment)
2) Bush, Cheney, et.al – commit so much malfeasance, fuck up every government agency, etc. so that no one can investigate it all. That way much of your corruption just gets “let through”
3) General Republican party – as many scandals as you can, the more perverted or convoluted the better, so that no one can document/follow them all.
Sense a trend?
Dreggas
sorry for the cock block but signing statements are so last year…
Peter Johnson
So that makes it okay? I’m sure there are recent examples of Democrats paying gay prostitutes as well. Why not discuss them?
jcricket
It wasn’t an accident, per se. He was just afraid a black man might beat him up (actual excuse used by Republican in Florida to explain why he paid a black male hooker to give him a BJ in a park).
r€nato
find them and we’ll discuss. We’ll be especially interested if you can find any gay-bashing Democrats who hire gay prostitutes.
Jake
Bob Allen went into a bathroom stall with an undercover cop and offered the officer $20 if he would let Allen give him a BJ.
Sorry to be pendantic but it is one of those stories that is stranger than the usual GOP strangeness.
binzinerator
Republican Manlove, interested in some guy’s seat.
Well, duh, of course he would be.
OxyCon
Seriously, what kind of “marketing and advertising firm” do you think a guy named “Manlove” could run.
Geez, change your reaking name already. It’s really bad “marketing and advertising”.
binzinerator
Wahhaaa ha aha! [snort then coffee backs up into my nose]
Damn you, you’re keeping me from my work too!
r€nato
but will he ask the House Whip to poll his caucus if elected?
Jake
Depends on what you’re marketing.
Killer website, but it is hard to read about Manlove’s spheres of influence without sniggering.
If this results in 10-Gallon chapeaued faux cowboys holding signs that read “We Love Manlove!” I will be content.
John's Minions
Peter, you’re getting close to going over the top. You should take a few days off and come back with something more a generic, a real neocon troll would have changed the subject to the Clintons, not stated something easily refuted by Google.
Remember Spoofs, when in doubt, just carbon whatever Rush said today. That guy is the Panacea of Bullshit.
jcricket
Thanks for the clarification. In my continual naivete I had assumed it couldn’t possible be as wacky as you described, given the excuse Bob Allen was using (“I was afraid of the darkies so that’s why I paid”). I guess giving the BJ was just added protection for Allen?
Again, proves the point that the true Republican agenda is to act so outlandishly everyone will assume it can’t possibly be true. I can see the headline now: “No one willing to pay for articles mocking self-mocking Republican shenanigans, Onion folds”
jenniebee
Remember when it wasn’t the BJ from Monica, it was the lying about it that was just too reprehensible to be let go?
Good times.
RSA
Nice suggestions, cleek. I’ll go with the simple Manlove for Congress.
dude
If Bob Allen is not gay he probably gave a bad blow job. That would have put him in a bad spot too, with all the ear-pulling and getting smacked upside the head, choking, getting face rammed.
Peter Johnson
Do you even know what a neocon is? A neocon is a social liberal with an extremely aggressive stance on foreign policy, esp. in the middle east. I am not a neocon.