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You are here: Home / Foreign Affairs / Mission Unpossible

Mission Unpossible

by John Cole|  November 2, 20079:26 am| 32 Comments

This post is in: Foreign Affairs, Republican Crime Syndicate - aka the Bush Admin.

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Fredd Kaplan sort of answers the question I was asking the other day- what the hell did Karen Hughes do? Turns out, not much:

Hughes initially embraced the job with relish, but she dived in way over her head. Some who know her say she eventually realized her inadequacy and altered her approach—away from being the public diplomat and toward building up the office.

It may be that, as she focused more on the substance and less on the flash, she realized that what she’d been asked to do simply couldn’t be done. If the measure of success was how well she was selling U.S. policy, she was failing because there was no good story to sell.

When the history of this administration is written, I hope somebody manages to explore the bizarre take on the Midas touch that these folks have had- let’s call it the Doodie touch. Everything they touch turns not to gold, but to shit.

*** Update ***

Turns out it has a name- the sidam touch.

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Previous Post: « Dog the Negro Hunter
Next Post: Mission Accomplished, Part Deux »

Reader Interactions

32Comments

  1. 1.

    scarshapedstar

    November 2, 2007 at 9:26 am

    It’s the Sadim Touch.

  2. 2.

    jenniebee

    November 2, 2007 at 9:34 am

    Pape, a University of Chicago political scientist who has conducted the most extensive research into the backgrounds and motives of suicide terrorists, is the author of “Dying to Win: The Strategic Logic of Suicide Terrorism,” and recently briefed the Pentagon and the National Counterterrorism Center. “If you set out to help bin Laden,” he said, “you could not have done it better than Hughes.”

    Heckuva job!

  3. 3.

    Wilfred

    November 2, 2007 at 9:37 am

    I’m sorry but this kind of snarky shit does not wash. The Slate article has the good sense to point out that no effort, from Hughes or anybody else, can mitigate the joint American/Israeli abuse of Palestinians. this is from the IHT review of the recent Lords of the Land, documenting the latest in the ongoing rape of Palestine:

    “Lords of the Land” is the first complete history of the settlement project. It provides a detailed narrative of injustice, and is profoundly depressing for anyone still hoping for a fair resolution of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, or even hoping that Jews and Arabs will be seen as equal in the eyes of Israeli law. In a chapter entitled “Everything Is Legal in the Land of Israel” Zertal and Eldar chronicle the paltry punishments given to settlers who kill Arabs, like the settlement leader Pinchas Wallerstein, who in 1988 shot two young Arabs in the back after he saw them burning a tire on the road. One died. Wallerstein was sentenced to four months community service.

    If Palestinian lives are cheap, much Palestinian land is even cheaper — that is, free, at least to the settlers and Israeli authorities. The security fence that snakes through the West Bank is, according to Zertal and Eldar, an unparalleled land grab. They write that it was “constructed with no reckoning and no logic other than the purpose of enclosing as many settlements as possible on the western, Israeli, side and dividing up and seizing Palestinian lands.”

    This may be an angry, embittered book, but the two authors are well-informed experts. Zertal is a noted Israeli historian, who now teaches at the University of Basel, and Eldar is an influential columnist for the left-wing daily, Ha’aretz. They are especially good on Gush Emunim, the Bloc of the Faithful, the religious Zionists driving the settlement project and the compromises with them made by a weak secular Israeli establishment.

    Four months commuunity service for killing a kid – and that’s only one microscopic part of the story. Your tax dollars fund this, but you would rather poke fun at Hughes than ask yourself why no one, so-called Progressive or fat-ass Conservative, ever stops to think if US support for this shit is either moral or sensible.

    Cast out the mote in your own eye before you make fun of Hughes.

  4. 4.

    John Cole

    November 2, 2007 at 9:40 am

    You didn’t even read the excerpt I posted, did you, Wilfred? Let alone the whole piece.

  5. 5.

    Ellison, Ellensburg, Ellers, and Lambchop

    November 2, 2007 at 9:41 am

    Fredd Kaplan sort of answers the question I was asking the other day- what the hell did Karen Hughes do? Turns out, not much:

    Kaplan has a negative evaluation of a close Bush confidant in Slate? Shocking.

    What’s next? Rush Limbaugh on “Was Bill Clinton a good President?” (I’m betting he’ll say no.)

  6. 6.

    F. Frederson

    November 2, 2007 at 9:49 am

    Which reminds me of the D-Squared challenge:

    …give me one single example of something with the following three characteristics:
    It is a policy initiative of the current Bush administrationIt was significant enough in scale that I’d have heard of it (at a pinch, that I should have heard of it)It wasn’t in some important way completely fucked up during the execution.

    The challenge does assume that the goal can never be to leave things worse than they were found, which may wrong.

  7. 7.

    Zifnab

    November 2, 2007 at 9:58 am

    Your tax dollars fund this, but you would rather poke fun at Hughes than ask yourself why no one, so-called Progressive or fat-ass Conservative, ever stops to think if US support for this shit is either moral or sensible.

    On the Isreal/Palestine crisis, its certainly not a party thing. The AIPAC lobby has both Dems and Pubs firms in its pocket. That said, when Clinton went to Isreal in a Carter-esque attempt to mend fences, he sat down with Arafat and Barak and brokered a peace deal. This while Republicans threw giant flaming turds at the process by claiming that Clinton was negotiating with terrorists and appeasing murders (nothing gets a thuglican off on a tirade like praising Araft, unless you’re praising Clinton or Carter).

    Bush proceeded to piss on the entire deal and egg Isreal on every time Sharon or Olmert decided to lob mortars and missles into neighboring countries.

    While Democrats and Republicans may both side with Isreal, the methods of support they choose to extend are radically different. Karen Hughs is the work product of generations of Republican Arab-hating. Not surprisingly, she doesn’t get anything productive done in the Middle East. Claiming “Clinton did it too” is about as far removed from fact-based reality as you can get.

  8. 8.

    Wilfred

    November 2, 2007 at 10:00 am

    You didn’t even read the excerpt I posted, did you, Wilfred? Let alone the whole piece.

    Of course I read it. I could have fucking written it. The point I’m making is that the grotesque American/Israeli policy in Palestine has the tacit support of both parties, which is why the fucking policy mentioned in the article has not changed and never will. Has any Democrat challenged Israeli encroachment in the Occupied territories since Bush has been President, enabling the kind of repression, including torture, that makes people around here gasp at the ‘horror’? Only when its Palestinians on the receiving end it draws a blank, or snarky comments.

    The snickering about Hughes obscures the policy – which no one can ever mention.

  9. 9.

    Zifnab

    November 2, 2007 at 10:12 am

    Has any Democrat challenged Israeli encroachment in the Occupied territories since Bush has been President, enabling the kind of repression, including torture, that makes people around here gasp at the ‘horror’?

    Oh bullshit. Has any Democrat challenged White House encroachment on US Civil Liberties since Bush has been President, enabling the kind of repression, including torture, that makes people around here gasp at the ‘horror’?

    The Democrats have failed on so many counts, so often and so consistently that you can hardly pin being too gosh darn friendly with Israel as the reason they’re pussies in the face of injustice.

  10. 10.

    Wilfred

    November 2, 2007 at 10:29 am

    You earlier:

    The AIPAC lobby has both Dems and Pubs firms in its pocket.

    You now:

    The Democrats have failed on so many counts, so often and so consistently that you can hardly pin being too gosh darn friendly with Israel as the reason they’re pussies in the face of injustice.

    Whatever. Aipac’s power will be felt with Muskassey’s nomination, watch Schumer/Feinstein.

    To me, un-critiqued American support for Israeli actions against Palestinians is criminal. Anybody who ‘supports’ Israel should at least admit that their support includes the suffering inflicted on Palestinians.

  11. 11.

    Redleg

    November 2, 2007 at 10:34 am

    It should be called “The Anus Touch” because everything they touch turns to shit.

  12. 12.

    Rudi

    November 2, 2007 at 10:49 am

    Hank Hyde, Karen Hughes and Dog the Bountyhunter for the Pres Medal of Freedom. As Muhammad Ali said, the guys crazy…

  13. 13.

    Dreggas

    November 2, 2007 at 10:49 am

    Redleg Says:

    It should be called “The Anus Touch” because everything they touch turns to shit.

    wouldn’t that be the colon touch?

  14. 14.

    Jake

    November 2, 2007 at 11:32 am

    AKA The Curtis Touch.

  15. 15.

    Jon H

    November 2, 2007 at 11:47 am

    I call it the “fecal midas” effect.

  16. 16.

    Zifnab

    November 2, 2007 at 12:12 pm

    To me, un-critiqued American support for Israeli actions against Palestinians is criminal. Anybody who ‘supports’ Israel should at least admit that their support includes the suffering inflicted on Palestinians.

    And that is what I’m saying. Dems give two shits about the Palestinians, Puds don’t. Keep in mind that for all the Palestinian outrage, they still strap bombs to kids. Saying this is somehow an “Israeli” problem is foolish. Israel is a political ally and a religious ally in a hostile environment. You might as well chew up the US for supporting Jordan or Saudi Arabia or Turkey as Israel. They’ve all committed their fair share of atrocities.

    But a Dem President and a Dem Congress will seek peace – even if they do come down on the side of Israel. A Republican President and a Republican Congress will just encourage more Lebanons and Six Day Wars.

    If you can’t determine the difference, you’re an idiot.

  17. 17.

    Wilfred

    November 2, 2007 at 12:34 pm

    . Keep in mind that for all the Palestinian outrage, they still strap bombs to kids.

    Go fuck yourself. Let’s see:

    1) For all the Black outrage about Katrina, they still let their kids sell crack cocaine and join gangs. That’s fair, no? I mean ALL Palestinians are terrorists and all blacks are

    If you can’t determine the difference, you’re an idiot

    I live the difference. You, on the other hand, have found the time-honored rationalization for why it’s ok for the Israelis to shit on Palestinians at will – because they are a political and, wait for it, a religious ally.

    Now that would be in the war against Islam, correct? The one that does not exist?

    You talk a good game, like most scumbags, but when confronted with your own hypocrisy, this is the best you can come up with.

    You are right about one thing – Israel, Saudi Arabia and Turkey – they all in some way maintain a repressive authority against the legitimate political aspirations of other people – that’s why their American allies, asshole.

    But a Dem President and a Dem Congress will seek peace

    Right, after the Israelis have stolen every bit of arable land on the West bank. Peace, huh? Indians peace. Apartheid peace.

    Primo Levi said it best: “In the Palestinians, the Jews have found their Jews.”

    Sleep well, scumbag, you’re on the same side as angels like Pat Robertson.

  18. 18.

    HyperIon

    November 2, 2007 at 1:35 pm

    The US policy wrt the Palestinians is crap. Has been crap for some time. Will continue to be crap until folks stop shouting “antisemitism” every time the matter is brought up. Israel is a state whose interests do not always align with those of the US. They know that but many in this country cannot wrap their tiny minds around this SIMPLE fact.

    Nevertheless Karen Hughes is still a sad manifestation of the Bush admin incompetency.

  19. 19.

    Zifnab

    November 2, 2007 at 2:35 pm

    Go fuck yourself. Let’s see:

    Right back at you. I’m sorry, but a city hit by a natural disaster and a country in what effectively amounts to a sixty year civil war are every so slightly different.

    Palestinians didn’t take their oppression lying down, which is good. Unfortunately, they expressed their outrage in the most violent ways possible. That’s bad. Hamas and Fatwah have their share of bloodied hands, Israel’s bloodied hands just happen to be better funded.

    You, on the other hand, have found the time-honored rationalization for why it’s ok for the Israelis to shit on Palestinians at will – because they are a political and, wait for it, a religious ally.

    Yeah, I know. Crazy, right? When have two countries ever, in the history of the world, allied for political and religious reasons despite committing atrocities.

    It’s taken us nearly a hundred years to condemn the Armenian Genocide in Turkey. And people are still bitchy about it, because Turkey is an ally. Remember Bosnia and Croatia and the teeth Clinton had to pull to get our troops in there? You think this sort of politics is easy?

    And – by god I hate to do this, but – I don’t see you condemning Iran for bolstering the other side. Peace requires hard work and sacrifice. Clinton had a deal on the table in 2000 that would have given Palestinians arable land, security, a government, and international recognition. From there, Arafat could have worked – peacefully – for more. It was Arafat who turned Barak down, which resulted in the Lukid party rising to power and, in turn, the Hamas government rising up in Palestine. Arafat choose to keep duking it out and his country choose to go along with him. The Democrats did everything in their power to prevent the current crisis, but it was the Palestinians and the Israels who put their cards on the table.

    Now you’ve got the sheer audacity to compare Karen Hughs to the likes of Madaline Albright, and I call absolute bullshit. You’ve got no idea what you’re talking about if you think Republicans and Democrats have the same foreign policy in the Middle East, much less the same foreign policy in Israel/Palestine.

  20. 20.

    r€nato

    November 2, 2007 at 2:50 pm

    I was wondering why we never heard much about all the awesum things she was doing to polish Bush’s turds.

    Now I know why. It was a sinecure.

  21. 21.

    r€nato

    November 2, 2007 at 3:23 pm

    well, I’ve waded through the Israel/Palestine flame wars here, and – well aware that the politics of this topic are more poisonous than those of abortion – I’m going to dive in, and I’ll probably be sorry I did so:

    So, Wilfred says Dems and Repubs are two sides of the same coin wrt Israel/Palestine. Zifnab calls BS, says Dems are better than Repubs.

    Gotta go with Zifnab on this one. While one can certainly find plenty of Dems who toe the AIPAC/Likud line, it’s a fact that Clinton worked virtually until his last day in office to try to broker a deal. The fact that he was doing this while a very lame duck was astounding to me. That’s how much he believed in this.

    Compare and contrast with Bush’s Israel/Palestine policy, which is basically a) let Israel do whatever it wants, and b) it’s a side issue compared to GWoT – kill all the terra-ists and Israel/Palestine will fall into place. I think that theory has pretty well been shot down by reality, not to mention all informed commentators in the Middle East, who might actually have a better feel for the situation on the ground there than all the AIPAC-bought-and-paid for think tanks in DC.
    OK, who’s worse – Israel or Palestine? Gee, where to start. I find it difficult to disagree with the idea that the Palestinians got punished after WW2 for what the Nazis did.
    OTOH, I also find it difficult to disagree with the idea that the Palestinians (that is, their leadership) rarely misses an opportunity to miss an opportunity. Arafat blew it in 2000. Time and time again, the Palestinians make ‘perfect’ the enemy of ‘good’.
    Fatah is notoriously corrupt – I do not see how the Palestinians could govern themselves even if they were granted a state and sufficient funds to rebuild their infrastructure. Hamas has some experience at delivering social services, but can they ever quit being revolutionaries and become bureaucrats instead?
    WRT Palestinian resistance tactics… I don’t expect them to lie down and submit – especially when Israel keeps stealing their land – and how do they resist when confronted with tanks and heavy artillery and airplanes, when they have none? They do what they have to, with what they’ve got. Yes, suicide bombing is deplorable. Using kids, even more so. They are a desperate people and desperate people do desperate things, particularly when they have little left to lose. I don’t approve; but I do understand why.
    Israel has to quit taking Palestinian land, and in fact give back the ‘settlements’. That, of course, will never happen. Look what happened when Sharon made a serious effort to have one settlement dismantled.
    I am pretty well convinced that no matter what deal the Palestinians get in time, it won’t be enough and they’ll demand more – which is only human nature – and if they don’t get it, they’ll resume the terror tactics – which is unacceptable. Reasonable Israelis want a deal that gives the Palestinians a state, and in return Palestine ceases killing Israelis as a negotiating tactic when they don’t get what they want. I hope I’m wrong about that.

    Flame away.

  22. 22.

    r€nato

    November 2, 2007 at 3:25 pm

    jesus christ. The ol/li formatting shows up in the preview but not in the actual posted comment. Any way to fix this, John? I just rendered my comment virtually unreadable.

  23. 23.

    nightjar

    November 2, 2007 at 5:10 pm

    Question for Wilfred. Do you approve of the existence of Israel in the land of Palestine?

  24. 24.

    Wilfred

    November 2, 2007 at 5:26 pm

    While one can certainly find plenty of Dems who toe the AIPAC/Likud line, it’s a fact that Clinton worked virtually until his last day in office to try to broker a deal. The fact that he was doing this while a very lame duck was astounding to me. That’s how much he believed in this.

    One of Clinton’s first acts as President was to sign a bill authorizing the American government to guarantee 10 billion dollars in loans that the Israelis had taken out in order to finance settlements on stolen Palestinian land. President Bush had refused to do this and was excoriated right up until the election because of it.

    Read what I just wrote before making any claims about Clinton. Then read it again. Then remember that his heroic deal-making was brokered by Dennis Ross, who later wrote the memoir giving the ‘official story’ that it was the fault of the Palestinians. He is currently at a neo-con think tank in Jerusalem, so much for American impartiality.

    As for the rest of this nonsense, just remember one thing. have you heard anyone complain about the settlements? Biden, a ranking Democrat and candidate for President, for fuck’s sake, has described himself as a Zionist. Anybody complain?

    The Israelis dropped millions of cluster bomblets on southern Lebanon at the end of their last invasion. Did you complain? Did any Democrat complain? I didn’t think so.

    The correct position for a progressive is to oppose injustice and tyranny, not rationalize it away in favor of what is politically expedient.

    And – by god I hate to do this, but – I don’t see you condemning Iran for bolstering the other side.

    Why on earth would I condemn the Iranians? They’re the only people willing to help the Palestinians, who are the people I care about. I’m under no moral or political obligation to give a fuck about Israel. You, on the other hand, are under a moral obligation to recognizes the oppression and humiliation the Palestinians suffer at the hands of the Israelis every fucking day, paid for in large part by your tax dollars. But you don’t, because to do so would entail acknowledging the essential hypocrisy of the so-called progressives.

    recently, Bush authorized that 30 billion dollars be given to Israel for weapons purchases, under the stipulation that 29 billion be used to buy arms from American weaponeers – a perfect sweetheart deal. There was a time when leftists would have gone to the streets over that, or at least raised an eyebrow. I mentioned here twice and nobody said a word. It’s just too damned difficult to recognize that the Israelis kill a people for their sport and we pay for it.

  25. 25.

    Wilfred

    November 2, 2007 at 5:36 pm

    Question for Wilfred. Do you approve of the existence of Israel in the land of Palestine?

    Sure, as long as it includes borders that follow the green line of 1967 and agrees with UN242.

  26. 26.

    nightjar

    November 2, 2007 at 6:08 pm

    Sure, as long as it includes borders that follow the green line of 1967 and agrees with UN242.

    Ok. second question, do you think that Israel would be behaving in the often cruel way it does toward Palestinians, if suddenly Hamas and other opposition groups stopped the efforts to kill Jews whenever possible and accepted the idea of Israel’s existence? [notwithstanding the existence of Jewish settlements in the West Bank]? My point is, this isn’t a chicken or egg argument. If the terror stops against Jews and the existential threat they live with every day goes away, in my humble opinion Israel would cease atrocities on their side and if they didn’t at least dems would insist they change their behavior. If this were to happen Dems would also, I hope, insist the settlements be removed and a pre 1967 war green line be the boundaries of between Israel and Palestine.

    (b) For achieving a just settlement of the refugee problem;

    I’m guessing this is the part of UN 242 you are referring to aka right of return. This would be the toughest thing to accomplish, but if the things I mentioned above actually happened then hopefully good faith will triumph and this can be worked out for both sides. Maybe I’m being a Pollyanna, but you never know.

  27. 27.

    lymie

    November 2, 2007 at 10:38 pm

    No, it is the Midas touch – everything turns into mufflers…

  28. 28.

    TenguPhule

    November 3, 2007 at 12:15 am

    They’re the only people willing to help the Palestinians, who are the people I care about.

    The same people who picked Saddam’s side in Gulf War I, estranging themselves from every other country in the Mideast. Smart strong policy right there.

    I’m under no moral or political obligation to give a fuck about Israel. You, on the other hand, are under a moral obligation to recognizes the oppression and humiliation the Palestinians suffer at the hands of the Israelis every fucking day, paid for in large part by your tax dollars.

    So fuck you and your Palestinians. You bitch and moan about ‘lumping them all together’ when others point out that the unofficial Palestinian policy is terrorism and their political party in power endorses genocide and then turn around and do THE EXACT SAME THING to the Israelis.

    I’m under no moral obligation to give a rat’s ass about your Pals. After the shit pulled in the last decade, no government in their right mind would trust the assholes running things there.

    Yes, the Israeli settlers are assholes, but they’re only one faction. For all their faults, the Israelis have their doves trying to work things out.

    Oddly enough, the only time I tend to hear of Palestinian doves is when they’re executed by their own people as ‘traitors’ and the bullet riddled bodies are dumped in the street.

  29. 29.

    Wilfred

    November 3, 2007 at 6:10 am

    Fuck you and your Izzies, You support a policy that oppresses another people. It’s convenient for you to invoke Bushspeak -TEERORISM! GENOCIDE’ MURDER! when it suits your purposes,, which is to parrot the Aipac line any time someone dares to mention Israeli terror tactics. Of course, when it’s a war that you don’t like, say Iraq, and people invoke the same bullshit words of power that you use here they’re ‘fascists’ or ‘lunatics’. Right.

    25:1 death rate this year of Palestinian civilians to Izzies, but hey, what are some more brown people among fellow travelers.

    Luckily for you, the misery of the Palestinians and the terror tactics used by the IDF in Gaza are invisible to Americans who, like you, are content to shove more food into their overstuffed bellies, shit 10 times a day and muse about why the Palestinians don’t love their children as much as you do.

    One more thing, motherfucker. I don’t bitch and moan about anything, much less put lipstick on kosher pigs like you do with this pathetic defense of Israeli criminality.

  30. 30.

    TenguPhule

    November 3, 2007 at 9:16 pm

    25:1 death rate this year of Palestinian civilians to Izzies, but hey, what are some more brown people among fellow travelers.

    Cry me a river. You support a policy of deliberate civilian targeted killings in violation of every rule of war. If the Israelis wanted to be American style assholes they’d be doing nothing but airstrikes instead of risking their own soldier’s lives to go in and arrest Palestinian terrorists who receive better treatment then their Israeli victims.

    which is to parrot the Aipac line any time someone dares to mention Israeli terror tactics.

    The Wilfred standard dodge to Palestinian terrorism. Because those ‘brave’ Pals of yours really show their courage sneaking into homes to kill the kids sleeping in their beds. Yes, those shopping malls and ice cream parlors and movie theaters were real fortresses of terror, AMIRITE?

    One more thing, motherfucker. I don’t bitch and moan about anything, much less put lipstick on kosher pigs like you do with this pathetic defense of Israeli criminality.

    Kiss HAMA’s ass and ask for another. Your unquestioning support for the Palestinians and blatent genocidal hate for the Israelis mark you for what you are.

    Give your copy of Mein Kamph a big wet kiss.

  31. 31.

    Wilfred

    November 4, 2007 at 6:42 am

    You’re right. Let’s kill every one of these sand nigger motherfuckers. Let’s put pig blood on tampons and shove them in their mouths. These baby-killing Palestinian animals, not fit to breathe the same air as humans.

    Let’s rape their sisters in the streets, shove bayonets up their stinking Muslim cunts and shoot flares up their mothers’ asses. Let’s show them who’s boss. Let’s take the gloves off let’s do it. Let’s kill all the nigger terrorists once and for all so that the good people of Israel and America can live the perpetual peace and bliss of the sanctified and God-blessed.

    Because they’ll never change. It’s the only way.

  32. 32.

    TenguPhule

    November 4, 2007 at 5:33 pm

    Because they’ll never change. It’s the only way.

    Only as long as there are Palestinians who think like you.

    It may take thousands of years of evolution, but eventually Palestinians will figure out that killing women and children will not get them what they want. Let us know if you ever reach that stage too.

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