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You are here: Home / Sports / Steelers Open Thread

Steelers Open Thread

by John Cole|  November 26, 20077:21 pm| 31 Comments

This post is in: Sports

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GO STILLERS! Beat the fish!

*** Update ***

Will someone pick up the 22 kids at Heinz field who just played a pony league football game on national tv?

Steelers win, 3-0.

Blech.

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31Comments

  1. 1.

    A different Matt

    November 26, 2007 at 7:30 pm

    Well John, given the Steelers penchant for playing down to their opposition’s talent and losing games they’re supposed to win, does this game have you worried?

    Also, I think dolphins are mammals – that taste like fish.

  2. 2.

    PaulW

    November 26, 2007 at 7:34 pm

    If you’re talking about Ben Stiller and his family taking on the Dolphins… well then yeah I do think the Stillers can beat ’em.

  3. 3.

    Gold Star for Robot Boy

    November 26, 2007 at 8:44 pm

    Go clubs! Beat the seals!
    It’s about the same, really.

  4. 4.

    Abe Froman

    November 26, 2007 at 9:38 pm

    damn’t go najah davenport. I need 2.64 fantasy points out of him. damn ronnie brown’s injury!!!

  5. 5.

    IanY77

    November 26, 2007 at 10:15 pm

    GSfRB:

    I’ll skip the tired “you own me a new keyboard” joke and just say that you made my friggin’ night. Thanks.

    And I was panning to skip this, but then I heard that old Smokey Williams was activated for the game and I had to watch. Work’s gonna suck tomorrow.

  6. 6.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    November 26, 2007 at 10:30 pm

    Also, I think dolphins are mammals

    They sure are! Why do people call them “fish”?

  7. 7.

    Tim F.

    November 26, 2007 at 10:37 pm

    I feel as if I died and woke up in fan hell. Their entire team is (a) emotionally damaged, (b) injured and ( c) worse than the Patiot’s maintenance staff pick up team, yes somehow we can’t score on them for three quarters. If we play down to their level any worse the two teams will just sit around in the mud laughing at each others’ farts.

  8. 8.

    D-Chance.

    November 26, 2007 at 10:50 pm

    Well, no one has to worry about missing anything exciting while hitting the fridge or taking a bathroom break…

  9. 9.

    Bubblegum Tate

    November 26, 2007 at 10:53 pm

    I can’t shake the feeling that the Steelers are gonna lose because the Dolphins get the only score of the game on some total fluke play. This sucks.

  10. 10.

    Ryan S.

    November 26, 2007 at 11:03 pm

    I know its muddy but, but ah wow. Talk about a toilet bowl, *gulf clap* for the Steelers. I kinda wish the dolphins would score they’re so cute in their suckiness.

  11. 11.

    Tim F.

    November 26, 2007 at 11:09 pm

    We’re never getting picked for Monday night football again.

  12. 12.

    mantis

    November 26, 2007 at 11:10 pm

    This is one of the funniest games I’ve seen.

  13. 13.

    Ryan S.

    November 26, 2007 at 11:18 pm

    Its gotta be a dangerous place in John’s living room I can only imagine the obscenities, and other things being hurled.

  14. 14.

    jake

    November 26, 2007 at 11:18 pm

    Maybe if they had water wings?

  15. 15.

    Ryan S.

    November 26, 2007 at 11:26 pm

    WOOOT 3 to 0.. they’re gonna blow em out… oh wait this is football not hockey.

  16. 16.

    A Different Matt

    November 26, 2007 at 11:26 pm

    Dude,

    The Dolphins only gave up 3 points – and lost! How crazy is that?

  17. 17.

    Tim F.

    November 26, 2007 at 11:27 pm

    WTF was that.

  18. 18.

    demimondian

    November 26, 2007 at 11:27 pm

    Yes, really. I mean, wow! A field goal with 0:17 to play. Dude!

    Um, John — maybe you should root for a better football team? Like, I dunno…the New York Yankees? Or perhaps the Serbian National Basketball Team?

  19. 19.

    demimondian

    November 26, 2007 at 11:28 pm

    There’s a worse outcome, you know — to give up three points and lose *by one*.

  20. 20.

    J. Michael Neal

    November 26, 2007 at 11:35 pm

    In sloppy weather, Ian Snell throws a three-hit, four-walk shutout, striking out two Marlins. After a one out Freddy Sanchez single and a Xavier Nady walk in the bottom of the ninth, Jason Bay hit a three run homer to send the crowd home happy with a 3-0 win. Justin Miller took the loss in relief of Sergio Mitre.

  21. 21.

    PaulW

    November 26, 2007 at 11:44 pm

    That wasn’t a football field, it was a swimming pool.

    I know it’s up north, but damn don’t you guys know anything about drainage?

    Actually, I just remembered, Joe Robbie Stadium has the same drainage problems. I wonder if the Dolphins snuck in last night and messed with the sprinkler system…

  22. 22.

    guyermo

    November 26, 2007 at 11:44 pm

    if it makes you feel better, john, i saw a US Airways plane with the steelers logo painted on it today at Minneapolis International. No word if Larry Craig was on it.

  23. 23.

    John S.

    November 27, 2007 at 12:05 am

    Actually, I just remembered, Joe Robbie Stadium has the same drainage problems.

    Hell, it hasn’t been called that for years. I forgot what corporate sponsor they licensed the stadium out to most recently, but at least it hasn’t changed names as often as the Bank Atlantic Center (home of the Florida Panthers).

    Wow, upon Googling I discovered it is merely called Dolphin Stadium now. I guess nobody wants to pay to sponsor such a shitty team’s home field.

  24. 24.

    gogiggs

    November 27, 2007 at 5:34 am

    I love football, but man was I glad to find “This is Spinal Tap” running on VH1 Classic starting at 10. I switched channels with no concern at all that I might miss something good in the football game. Nice to see I was right. Besides, by 10 it was pretty clear that Willie Parker wasn’t going to get me the 25 points I needed to win my fantasy game.

  25. 25.

    Steven Taylor

    November 27, 2007 at 8:07 am

    It was semi-amusing at the very end to see how late in the game they could get before scoring.

    I was semi-hoping for a 0-0 tie, just to say I saw it (but the problem there, of course, was having to see it). Watching via semi-delayed TiVo helped, as I could fast forward through some of it.

  26. 26.

    Sensitive Pony Tail Girly Man

    November 27, 2007 at 8:27 am

    3-zip. Now that’s my kind of football. None of that classless running-up-the-score stuff like that Evil Team that shall not be named often does. Folks will pay good money, even more than they already do, for this brand of class. Nobody’s widdle feelings were hurt in this one. Sweet!

  27. 27.

    zzyzx

    November 27, 2007 at 9:35 am

    Yeah I was rooting for the 0-0 tie. Would have been pretty insane.

  28. 28.

    Vlad

    November 27, 2007 at 9:57 am

    As far as I’m concerned, a win’s a win.

  29. 29.

    Sstarr

    November 27, 2007 at 11:38 am

    The game was almost a total waste, but was redeemed by one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen – the third quarter punt by Miami that hit the ground and sunk eight inches into the mud without bouncing. I haven’t laughed so hard in weeks. Of course, by then I WAS pretty desperate to find something entertaining in the exercise….

  30. 30.

    jon

    November 27, 2007 at 11:49 am

    All I care about is Miami’s perfect season. 0-16 is about all I’m following this year.

  31. 31.

    Gindy

    November 27, 2007 at 1:20 pm

    In all fairness, have any of you ever played football on such a field and in such conditions? I haven’t played football but I have played soccer and it was like running and kicking a ball in a bowl of jello. Just the worst possible combination of things to ever play in. Of course if you fell down you didn’t get hurt (unless some ASSHOLE stepped on your shoulder, Ricky Williams style).
    That said, I thought it was fun to watch and even if it had ended in a tie, it was still good “clean” fun (except for the shoulder crunch Williams took).

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