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You are here: Home / z-Retired Categories / Previous Site Maintenance / Desperately Needed Open Thread

Desperately Needed Open Thread

by Michael D.|  December 24, 20079:48 am| 41 Comments

This post is in: Previous Site Maintenance

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‘Tis the season to be furious.

Update: I will be spending the day shopping for my Polish neighbors’ two dogs and two cats. for the past few years, I’ve really enjoyed the Polish Christmas Eve tradition of Wigilia (pronounced vig-EEL-ya.) Traditionally, this is a 12-course meatless meal (that includes fish, which makes it meatful, in my opinion) that breaks a fast as you wait for the birth of Jesus. For me, it’s just a late dinner that starts as the first star becomes visible in the sky. After the meal, you exchange your gifts – pets are included as important participants in the feast.

Oh, and there’s vodka. Plenty.

Merry Christmas. Be like Mike Huckabee and use the occassion to find Christ. In Miami, they’re making “finding Christ” much easier this year.

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41Comments

  1. 1.

    calipygian

    December 24, 2007 at 10:05 am

    I travelled for a week through Poland a few years ago and stayed in downtown Krakow for a few days. I went to a basement bar in the old town and had a few beers and soaked up the smokey atmosphere. There were a bunch of people down there, whole families actualy, dressed in traditional dress, pounding beers, eating kiebasa and dancing to the live polka band. I definitely got the feeling that this wasn’t a tourist put on or a special occasion: this is how some Poles spent their Friday nights.

    Can’t beat that with a stick.

    Compare that with a typical DC area Friday night out: Fratboys with a Coors Light in one hand, a tequila shot in the other with a pseudo-ironic Gamecock hat with a fishhook stuck in the bill.

    Shudder.

  2. 2.

    myiq2xu

    December 24, 2007 at 10:08 am

    Be like Mike Huckabee and use the occassion to find Christ.

    He’s lost? Jesus Christ! Who was supposed to watching him?

    I can’t help you look cuz I’m helping OJ find the “real killers.”

  3. 3.

    myiq2xu

    December 24, 2007 at 10:20 am

    From the NY Observer:

    Karl Rove’s memoirs will be published by Threshold Editions, the conservative-minded imprint of Simon & Schuster’s Pocket Books overseen by GOP strategist Mary Matalin.

    I would have thought Charmin or Angel Soft would have been more appropriate publishers.

  4. 4.

    The Other Steve

    December 24, 2007 at 10:30 am

    For Christmas this year we are making traditional Russian beef stew in a clay pot. Not that it has anything to do with Christmas, I just told my girlfriend it’s bloody delicious and I want more.

  5. 5.

    brendancalling

    December 24, 2007 at 10:44 am

    I found Christ. He was hiding out in an old warehouse, where he was working furiously on a massive steel tentacled apparatus that would attach to his back, allowing him to commit crimes, dominate the world, and at long last defeat that odious web-spinning Spider Man.

    Other Steve, please print the russian beef stew recipe, or Jesus is coming for you next.

  6. 6.

    myiq2xu

    December 24, 2007 at 10:50 am

    Obligatory seasonal humor:

    Q: Why is Santa so jolly?

    A: Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

  7. 7.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 11:22 am

    The Air Force Academy – training missionaries one recruit at a time

  8. 8.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 11:24 am

    as an update to the above, the article also mentions Fort Jackson, where I went for BCT back in the 90’s. There was no religious indoctrination etc. now they have GOD’S BASIC TRAINING? WTF?

  9. 9.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 11:28 am

    Californians – support health insurance for everyone just as long as THEY don’t have to pay for it

    Unreal. Sure let’s tax those who smoke (hiking the cost 2 dollars a pack) and raise a few other taxes (negligible compared to cig taxes) to support insurance for the uninsured but when asked if they would support a 1 cent increase in the state sales tax for the same purpose the majority says hell no.

    And we wonder why this state has issues.

  10. 10.

    myiq2xu

    December 24, 2007 at 11:30 am

    as an update to the above, the article also mentions Fort Jackson, where I went for BCT back in the 90’s. There was no religious indoctrination etc. now they have GOD’S BASIC TRAINING? WTF?

    When I went to basic training at Ft. McClellan back in the 70’s we were taught THE DRILL SERGEANT IS GOD!

  11. 11.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 11:31 am

    Best. Cover. Evah! H/t sully

  12. 12.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 11:31 am

    myiq2xu Says:

    When I went to basic training at Ft. McClellan back in the 70’s we were taught THE DRILL SERGEANT IS GOD!

    Heh, yeah that was pretty much what we thought too.

  13. 13.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 11:34 am

    But Musharraf is our BFF fighting the terrorists…eh not so much

  14. 14.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 11:43 am

    Bwahahahaha

    The new tack against Huckabee….he’s seeking earthly power which the great Jaysus warned against!

  15. 15.

    The Other Steve

    December 24, 2007 at 11:45 am

    Other Steve, please print the russian beef stew recipe, or Jesus is coming for you next.

    I’ll see if I can get it. The key is the little clay pot. It comes out without much liquid, so in a way it’s more like maybe a pot roast. But it’s really tasty.

  16. 16.

    Zifnab

    December 24, 2007 at 11:56 am

    The new tack against Huckabee….he’s seeking earthly power which the great Jaysus warned against!

    Call me crazy, but doesn’t this somehow imply “Atheists for President”?

  17. 17.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 11:59 am

    Zifnab Says:

    The new tack against Huckabee….he’s seeking earthly power which the great Jaysus warned against!

    Call me crazy, but doesn’t this somehow imply “Atheists for President”?

    The mental gymnastics these people go through in order to make sense of it should be an olympic sport. To have to basically contort ones mind into the shape of a pretzel takes real talent, or the ability to paint oneself into a corner that leaves no room to move whatsoever. You know, like the not-so-fundie right did by courting the fundies.

  18. 18.

    Zifnab

    December 24, 2007 at 12:00 pm

    Mike Huckabee, by all accounts a faithful Christian, may not have crossed any bright lines yet — but he’s edging close to them. He should pull back now, before his political ambitions injure what he claims to care about, and undoubtedly does care about, most.

    “Yeah, slow down guys. Let’s not go dragging religion into politics. That would be crazy. And, btw, totally different from what Bush did in ’00 and ’04.”

    How does that guy talk with all the bullshit spewing out of his mouth?

  19. 19.

    MNPundit

    December 24, 2007 at 12:11 pm

    After the meal, you exchange your gifts – pets are included as important participants in the feast.

    You will be baked, then there will be cake.

    I hear cats taste lovely with the right sauce.

  20. 20.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 12:12 pm

    Zifnab Says:

    How does that guy talk with all the bullshit spewing out of his mouth?

    See my response above, then again maybe he’s a good ventriloquist.

  21. 21.

    Zifnab

    December 24, 2007 at 12:14 pm

    To have to basically contort ones mind into the shape of a pretzel takes real talent, or the ability to paint oneself into a corner that leaves no room to move whatsoever. You know, like the not-so-fundie right did by courting the fundies.

    Logical pretzels imply a certain degree of consistency. Sure the path is mangled, but you can still get from point A to point B if you follow the 143 step upside-down pattern.

    But they’ve stepped beyond that some time ago. Republicans don’t have any hard and fast beliefs anymore, it’s just “Say Anything To Get Elected”. Deficit Spending is the quintessential example. They won’t raise taxes to pay for tax cuts, they won’t raise taxes to pay for wars, they won’t cut subsidies to big industries (because that would be “raising taxes”), they won’t stop spending money on pet projects, and yet they STILL won’t stop talking about fiscal responsibility and a balanced budget. There’s no pretzel here. Some of these positions are wholly irreconcilable.

    With Huckabee as the nominee, neo-cons and corp-cons have turned their eyes on religion to start postulating mutually exclusive stances. The separation between Church and State will suddenly be a wedge against Baptist Minister Mike Huckabee that Mormon Bishop Mittens Romney will freely employee. Lines will be drawn in the sand about political correctness, then freely crossed when political opportunism dictates.

    And, in the end, I don’t think Mitt will be doing himself any favors. Theo-cons might turn to the Weekly Standard for their pants-shitting Middle East policies, but they turn to the alter for their pants-shitting Jesus policies. No one reads the Washington Post for a daily dose of theology, much less to Peter Wehner for lessons on religious litmus tests. The neo-cons will be preaching to the big-money choir, but Romney already has that crowd locked up. Diatribes against Huckabee being too religious won’t win Mitt any eleventh hour converts. Mormonism is already “suspect”, Mitt’s “I believe in Jesus” speech didn’t settle anyone’s doubts (the real reason that set it apart from JFK’s), and playing the “let’s not get to Christian” card isn’t going to appeal to any evangelical I’ve ever met.

    I just have no idea what these people are doing anymore.

  22. 22.

    Scott H

    December 24, 2007 at 12:18 pm

    @myiq2xu: I noticed where Karl Rove had to settle for a step down even from vanity press for his blockbuster book from the very center of the Bush Administration: charity press from Mary Matalin.

    Bonus, Alberto Gonzales is having trouble booking speaking gigs to fund his legal defense. Apparently, not so many are innarested in anything a former US Attorney General has to say. [WaPo blog link]

    Happy Holidays.

  23. 23.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 12:24 pm

    Bonus, Alberto Gonzales is having trouble booking speaking gigs to fund his legal defense. Apparently, not so many are innarested in anything a former US Attorney General has to say. [WaPo blog link]

    Maybe he should just write a book “If I did it”. Oh wait…

  24. 24.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 12:29 pm

    Zifnab says:

    I just have no idea what these people are doing anymore.

    Me either, I am just watching and laughing. Perhaps this is just what is needed though, a great unravelling of the christian bullshit in this country. You have the liberal side of religion, you know the part where that hippy Jesus came into being, then you have the old testament bible thumpers that handle snakes and speak gibberish that only an infant would understand, now the Mormons are getting in on it representing nothing more than the various takeoffs we have in this country on the whole christian faith.

    We have all of them getting ready for a battle royale on the right (and to a lesser extent on the left). In the end maybe they’ll eat each other and the rest of the country can see once and for all just how batshit insane they all are.

  25. 25.

    Michael D.

    December 24, 2007 at 12:39 pm

    After the meal, you exchange your gifts – pets are included as important participants in the feast.

    MNPundit: I actually changed that sentence before I published it. It originally read: Pets are an important part of the feast. I thought “participants” was more appropriate.

  26. 26.

    myiq2xu

    December 24, 2007 at 12:47 pm

    In the end maybe they’ll eat each other and the rest of the country can see once and for all just how batshit insane they all are.

    The GOP looked reasonably sane when they were the permanent minority party and acted as a check on Democratic excess. But their rise to power coincided with the lunatics taking over the asylum. Gingrinch, Delay, Lott and Armey were corrupt before they got power, and got worse afterwards.

    They sold their party’s soul to the nut-job right and the holy-rolling Jesus freaks while they sold our nation to the “malefactors of great wealth.” Well, the chickens have come home to roost.

    Cluck, cluck motherfuckers! Cluck, cluck!

  27. 27.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 12:57 pm

    From the “You just can’t make this shit up department”

    I worked in the Mortgage industry, we had forms in multiple languages and a large number of spanish speakers working for us, this is BS.

  28. 28.

    jcricket

    December 24, 2007 at 1:11 pm

    Via Sadly, No, this “gem” of a personal ad from a conservative. You’d think it was an onion parody, but sadly, no.

  29. 29.

    demimondian

    December 24, 2007 at 1:17 pm

    Zifnab Says:

    How does that guy talk with all the bullshit spewing out of his mouth?

    Hey, dude, we had that down in the late Middle ages — Dante’s flatterers had it down (literally) in the eighth circle of Hell…

  30. 30.

    demimondian

    December 24, 2007 at 1:29 pm

    And, for what it is worth, _Inferno_ ought to be required reading for all ambitious political actors. It’s not *just* an allegory of a trip through Hell, it’s also a very sharp discussion of the evils of politics badly pursued. In a sense, it’s the book to which _The Prince_ is the mirror.

  31. 31.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 1:51 pm

    demimondian Says:

    And, for what it is worth, Inferno ought to be required reading for all ambitious political actors. It’s not just an allegory of a trip through Hell, it’s also a very sharp discussion of the evils of politics badly pursued. In a sense, it’s the book to which The Prince is the mirror.

    Yep, I agree.

  32. 32.

    John S.

    December 24, 2007 at 2:00 pm

    To have to basically contort ones mind into the shape of a pretzel takes real talent, or the ability to paint oneself into a corner that leaves no room to move whatsoever.

    It’s more like moebius logic. You travel along the same path but then somewhere along the way you end up on the opposite side. And as long as you keep moving along the same path, you’ll end up flipping sides an infinite number of times…or will you?

  33. 33.

    Dreggas

    December 24, 2007 at 2:06 pm

    Chuck Norris is a plant his real name is CARLOS! He’s just a part of the immigrant-liberal-fascist plot to get Mike Huckabee the nomination! Or something like that.

  34. 34.

    myiq2xu

    December 24, 2007 at 2:40 pm

    From Daniel Kurtzman at HuffPost-

    Best Fodder for the Late-Night Comedians:
    Senator Larry Craig (R-estroom) gave “new meaning to the word caucusing” (David Letterman) when he was caught playing footsie in the men’s room with his infamous “wide stance.” Craig announced his resignation, then later reversed his decision after “talking it over with guy in stall number 3” (Conan O’Brien), angering his Republican colleagues, some of whom “stopped having sex with him” (Jimmy Kimmel). The staunchly anti-gay lawmaker denied being a hypocrite, saying, “Hey, I wasn’t trying to marry the cop in the bathroom” (O’Brien). Later, he was inducted into the Idaho Hall of Fame — not the entire hall, “just the men’s room” (Jay Leno).

    There’s more if you’re interested.

  35. 35.

    RSA

    December 24, 2007 at 2:56 pm

    From the “You just can’t make this shit up department”:

    Thompson’s stop in Mason City, Iowa, allowed him to play on Republicans’ fears of immigrants and riff on apparent frustration with hearing options in Spanish on recorded phone messages.

    Janice Easley, one voter in the audience, was boiling with frustration at having to hear, “Para el español, prensa dos,” whenever she called the power company.

    “Everything is in Spanish,” she said. “It’s sickening.”

    The hospital emergency rooms in her area are overflowing with people suffering severe cases of Spanish poisoning.

    Some people just don’t realize how offensive they sound.

  36. 36.

    myiq2xu

    December 24, 2007 at 3:02 pm

    Janice Easley, one voter in the audience, was boiling with frustration at having to hear, “Para el español, prensa dos,” whenever she called the power company.

    Here’s my question: Since most of those messages start with “For English, press one,” why is she still listening by the time they get to Spanish? Is she waiting to find out what number to press for German?

  37. 37.

    jcricket

    December 24, 2007 at 5:57 pm

    Here’s my question: Since most of those messages start with “For English, press one,” why is she still listening by the time they get to Spanish? Is she waiting to find out what number to press for German?

    Well, English is one of those “liberal” subjects, so she’s waiting for “wingnut” or “Republican” as an option.

  38. 38.

    Cain

    December 24, 2007 at 10:54 pm

    I hear cats taste lovely with the right sauce.

    chihuahua cutlets with poodle sauce. Mmm. Mm good!

    cain

  39. 39.

    demimondian

    December 25, 2007 at 1:07 am

    I prefer fried rice poodles in a Chow sauce

  40. 40.

    McMartin

    December 25, 2007 at 1:44 am

    Here’s my question: Since most of those messages start with “For English, press one,” why is she still listening by the time they get to Spanish? Is she waiting to find out what number to press for German?

    The only way I can read it is that she’s offended that Spanish is an option at all.

    Well, OK. I can pretend she’s right that “Everything is in Spanish” and it’s actually “Para inglés, pulse uno”, and that after you press 1 the speech given is still in Spanish. I find this possibility somewhat unlikely.

  41. 41.

    Zifnab

    December 25, 2007 at 2:53 pm

    Here’s my question: Since most of those messages start with “For English, press one,” why is she still listening by the time they get to Spanish? Is she waiting to find out what number to press for German?

    The only way I can read it is that she’s offended that Spanish is an option at all.

    Isn’t that where someone points out, “Welcome to Capitalism”? Supply and demand, and whatnot? They going to deport all the illegal immigrants or go whole hog and deport everyone who speaks Spanish, period?

    People in this country need to grow a pair if this is the biggest thing they have to complain about. Greatest Generation my swollen left nut.

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