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You are here: Home / Politics / Shorter Hugh Hewitt

Shorter Hugh Hewitt

by John Cole|  January 6, 200810:47 am| 50 Comments

This post is in: Politics, I Read These Morons So You Don't Have To

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With all due respect to the folks at Sadly, No!, a shorter Hugh Hewitt:

“John McCain does not kiss my ass enough while I trash him. Check out my new Mitt Romney pom-poms!”

FWIW, McCain is on Face the Nation, and I think I have come to the conclusion that he is the best of all the bad options for the GOP. If there any chance I would vote for a Republican this year (there is not), it would probably be to hold my nose and vote McCain. Thompson is not serious, Romney is a fraud, Huckabee is a nutter (but he is pleasant and funny and self-deprecating, but still a nutter), and Paul has no chance.

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50Comments

  1. 1.

    myiq2xu

    January 6, 2008 at 10:54 am

    I used to have some respect for Johnny Mac. Like Bob Dole, I didn’t agree with him but believed that he was a man of honor.

    That was before he sold his soul to Darth Cheney. Now I think he’s a whore.

    But you’re right, he’s the “best” of the GOP field.

    Sad, isn’t it?

  2. 2.

    bago

    January 6, 2008 at 11:12 am

    Are you goin to crazytown? (insert daily show link here)

  3. 3.

    Bob In Pacifica

    January 6, 2008 at 11:25 am

    Too bad Jerry Orbach died. He would have done better than Fred Thompson, and his snappy remarks would’ve had them rolling in the aisles. And you know he would’ve found Osama holed up in a crack house somewhere in NYC to boot.

  4. 4.

    Paddy O'Shea

    January 6, 2008 at 11:35 am

    I just got booted from Rick Moron’s “Rightwing Nuthouse” for the 22nd time. My crime this go round was to say that the GOP is in the process of hitting the Trifecta for political collapse with the Hucklings, Neo-Cons and Paulites all showing signs of genuine hatred of each other.

    I also called him an armchair warrior, something that he resents.

  5. 5.

    myiq2xu

    January 6, 2008 at 11:35 am

    As Glenn Greenwald et.al so amply detailed this last week, the media expects to be courted and romanced by candidates.

    IOW – they want their asses kissed, licked, blown dry and powdered.

    I think the Clagina’s big mistake on the press poodle bus was she brought them bagels. She shoulda brought them Krispy Kremes.

  6. 6.

    myiq2xu

    January 6, 2008 at 11:39 am

    I also called him an armchair warrior, something that he resents.

    They can’t handle the truth. It’s like telling a woman that her baby is ugly.

    Imagine is someone had told Lucienne Goldberg that her son was stupid. Then he might not have gone out and proven it.

  7. 7.

    crayz

    January 6, 2008 at 11:42 am

    What about Führer Guiliani?

  8. 8.

    Paddy O'Shea

    January 6, 2008 at 11:43 am

    My revelatory McCain moment was the armpit sniff.

    http://www.esoterically.net/weblong/wp-content/uploads/2007/07/bush-mccain-huggies.jpg

  9. 9.

    cleek

    January 6, 2008 at 12:11 pm

    should he win the nomination this picture should be the background to every anti-McCain ad his opponent makes.

  10. 10.

    null pointer exception

    January 6, 2008 at 12:20 pm

    From the link:

    John McCain lacks the essential graciousness towards his critics and opponents that a president must have –the Reagan touch, the iron discipline that Bush has shown never to attack even his most partisan and harshest opponents in personal terms.

    On what planet does this blithering idiot live?

  11. 11.

    jrg

    January 6, 2008 at 12:39 pm

    After hearing Thomas Ricks on NPR, I’m not so sure if it’s such a good idea for us to pick up and leave Iraq. In some sense, I like McCain because I do think he is genuine in his support for a continuing presence in Iraq. I also applaud his opposition to torture.

    That said, I’m not a fan of his newfound love for the flat-earthers, and his hit single “Bomb Iran” never made it onto my iPOD.

    I don’t think I could vote for McCain, but I would be a lot less alarmed at his nomination than the other GOP contenders. Huck, Mitt and Giuliani scare me. In one way or another, any of those three could be worse than Bush.

  12. 12.

    Nicholas Weaver

    January 6, 2008 at 12:40 pm

    The McCain of 2000? I could have voted for. Pretty darn courageous, at least, and didn’t seem to suffer from too much republican loonyness.

    The McCain of 2008? A Coward. There is no way else to discribe his toadying to the white house on so many issues, when he had the moral authority and moral obligation to say No!

  13. 13.

    dslak

    January 6, 2008 at 12:57 pm

    I’m not so sure if it’s such a good idea for us to pick up and leave Iraq.

    How sure are you that it’s a good idea to stay?

    I also applaud his opposition to torture.

    McCain’s opposition to torture is far exceeded by his desire to become president. Check out any posts on this blog under the category ‘Spectering.’

  14. 14.

    bob

    January 6, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    McCain has always been a conservative. That makes him aristocratic in outlook. The conservatives feel entitled to what Roosevelt took from them. I never saw anything in McCain that made me think he was anything but what everyone can see now that he is a doddering old fool. Ronald Reagan was the last Republican I ever voted for (yeah, I bought into the LA Olympics USAUSAUSA bullshit for a minute)and had their been such an easy research tool as the current internet, I likely would not have voted for him then.

  15. 15.

    TheFountainHead

    January 6, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    So on the mornings after debates I use YouTube to determine who won by looking at the number of video clips of each player and how many of those are positive and how many are negative and then giving the each a multiplier based on the number of views each clip got overnight. My utterly unscientific results suggest that the Democrats won, hands down. Of the Republicans, McCain seems to have done the best, and of the Democrats, Barack Obama, far and away, carried the win. Just thought I’d share.

  16. 16.

    Davis X. Machina

    January 6, 2008 at 1:39 pm

    McCain has always been a conservative

    He’s Orrin Hatch, 2.0, with a better user interface, a completely written biography module, and a much better marketing campaing, but a lot of old code under the hood.

  17. 17.

    Jake

    January 6, 2008 at 1:40 pm

    FWIW, McCain is on Face the Nation, and I think I have come to the conclusion that he is the best of all the bad options for the GOP.

    Translation: I see before me several plates. And each plate bears a pile of steaming crap. If I had to pick a plate of crap to eat, I’d eat this one.

    The man is either a craven dick or out of his fucking mind.

    McCain: “As long as Americans are not being injured or harmed or wounded or killed. That’s fine with me, I hope that would be fine with you, if we maintain a presence in a very volatile part of the world where Al Queada is training and equipping and recruiting and motivating people every single day.

    [On keeping troops in Iraq for 100 years.]

    Thank you and goodnight Mr. Safe Streets of B’Dad. Leaving aside the logistics (something I kinda expect McCainiac to understand) how can one posit situation where soldiers are present in a volatile region but they don’t get hurt?

    If he means he wouldn’t leave soldiers there for 100 years because they’ll of course get injured harmed wounded killed he should just say it. If he means the soldiers should stay there for a 100 years because the area is dangerous and Al Q is there, he should just fucking say it.

  18. 18.

    jrg

    January 6, 2008 at 1:41 pm

    How sure are you that it’s a good idea to stay?

    I’m not, and I don’t claim to be an expert on the matter. My point is that McCain’s position appears to be held in earnest.

    There will be repercussions when we leave Iraq. It’s better to have a discussion about them now. I view McCain’s stance (for better or worse) as an acknowledgment that repercussions will exist, and should be planned for.

    Worldwide energy instability and even more lawlessness in Iraq could kill far more people if we leave.

    “Aren’t you against the Iraq war?” is starting to ring as hollow and political as “Isn’t the world better without Saddam Hussein?”

    We need to get out of Iraq ASAP, I agree, but we should be prepared for the consequences. McCain appears to be more concerned about Iraq after we leave than he is about about crass political pandering.

    But then again, it’s the GOP primary, so maybe I’m just parsing semantics. It does not matter anyway, because I’m going to vote a ticket for the party that did not call me a traitor for having doubts about the wisdom of the Iraq war back in 2003.

  19. 19.

    maxbaer (not the original)

    January 6, 2008 at 1:42 pm

    I love the way that every time one of their candidates looks like he’s building some momentum, the wingnuts are all over them like a pack of rapid hyenas.

  20. 20.

    myiq2xu

    January 6, 2008 at 1:53 pm

    I love the way that every time one of their candidates looks like he’s building some momentum, the wingnuts are all over them like a pack of rapid hyenas.

    I remember a line from years ago about how Democrats “eat their young,” referring to how the party leaders wouldn’t let young stars in the party rise up.

  21. 21.

    Incertus (Brian)

    January 6, 2008 at 2:01 pm

    and Paul has no chance.

    Are you saying that if he had a chance you’d vote for him? Just looking to clarify, because Paul is at least as nutty as Huckabee, just in a different way. My co-blogger put it this way: both Huckabee and Paul will probably destroy the country, but the rest of the Republicans will probably destroy the world.

  22. 22.

    TheFountainHead

    January 6, 2008 at 2:13 pm

    This primary has turned me into a junkie. It’s Sunday morning and there’s no political news of consequence and I’m starting to tweak.

  23. 23.

    mitch

    January 6, 2008 at 2:22 pm

    I think I have come to the conclusion that he [McCain] is the best of all the bad options for the GOP

    I agree. Although, I still have this nagging voice at the back of my head (which I usually ignore or drown in alcohol) that says Romney might not actually be that bad. Sure, as a candidate, he’s pathetic, flip-flopping like a fish outta water on a hotplate. But like Andrew and Ross, when Romney’s not pandering and actually discussing ideas or policy, he sounds like a thinking man—a man who knows how to solve problems and get shit done. Ross has another persuasive post suggesting why Romney ran as a base candidate rather than an “ideas” man. Add all that together, and I start thinking he’s been lying his ass off for the past year (or so) just to get the nomination, and that once he gets the nomination, then he’ll lead as a moderate, smart Republican (I think Yglesias has a similar post, but couldn’t find it).

    But then I reach for the bottle.

  24. 24.

    wasabi gasp

    January 6, 2008 at 2:27 pm

    I fancy me the Freddy Thompson ‘cuz that fella is downright ‘spectful to mah late sleepin’ way.

    He’s the prezdint I’d mos’ like to have a siesta with.

  25. 25.

    trollhattan

    January 6, 2008 at 2:31 pm

    To be sure, McCain’s their only grownup but that doesn’t mean I want him driving my kid to her soccer games for the next four years. He sold his soul at some point since 2000, and I don’t believe there’s a return policy in place.

  26. 26.

    trollhattan

    January 6, 2008 at 2:34 pm

    Nobody really believes Fred wants the job. He mostly sits at home looking over at the wife and saying, “Da-yammn!”

  27. 27.

    Svensker

    January 6, 2008 at 2:36 pm

    McCain always seemed dangerous to me because he is a classic militarist fascist, believer in the Big Government Ruling With the Big Stick — but he’s an honorable guy and decent people like him. Bush with a clue.

    That said, if I were going to be forced to live in a country and my choice for Fuhrer was between McCain or Rudy/Huck/Mitt, I’d go for McCain…then plot to get out.

  28. 28.

    neal peart

    January 6, 2008 at 2:50 pm

    You forgot to mention that Giuliani is a psychopath.

  29. 29.

    Incertus (Brian)

    January 6, 2008 at 2:55 pm

    You forgot to mention that Giuliani is a psychopath Republican.

    Fixed

  30. 30.

    The Other Steve

    January 6, 2008 at 3:11 pm

    I’m intrigued by the Vertical Leadership potentional of Mike Huckabee.

    But I was thinking, if we truly wanted to go vertical, wouldn’t we want Michael Jordan?

  31. 31.

    Tim (the other one)

    January 6, 2008 at 3:19 pm

    I think people tend to forget what a prick Bob Dole was.

  32. 32.

    Psycheout

    January 6, 2008 at 3:23 pm

    Hewitt is an idiot. He actually suggested a market downturn was due to Mittens not winning in Iowa.

    How much of the decline is due to the investor class rejecting the idea that any good news comes out of either Obama-McCain or Obama-Huckabee?

    Uh, none, Huge. Next stupid question.

  33. 33.

    Kevin K.

    January 6, 2008 at 3:39 pm

    To my surprise, because I loathe the dude, Giuliani looked okay last night when he wasn’t SPREADING THE FEAR. Thompson’s the human equivalent of day-old oatmeal. What a bowl of mush.

  34. 34.

    myiq2xu

    January 6, 2008 at 3:52 pm

    I think people tend to forget what a prick Bob Dole was.

    Uh, that would be “is” cuz he ain’t dead yet, he’s just working as a greeter at Walmart.

    But he can be a prick, he literally gave his right arm for this country. He is a man of honor who deserves respect, especially compared to Chimpy, who is a walking, talking piece of shit.

    Bob Dole was one of the last Republicans of stature.

    But I still wouldn’t vote for him.

  35. 35.

    Geoduck

    January 6, 2008 at 3:56 pm

    If I had to pick, I’d go with Romney over McCain. As someone more or less said above, you get the nagging impression with Mitt that if you stripped away all the pandering, there’s a somewhat decent administrator buried down there. McCain is quite literally old and tired, and not up to the job.

  36. 36.

    EL

    January 6, 2008 at 4:03 pm

    For those who want an innocent’s take on the Republican debate, there is this at the Great Orange Satan (AKA dKos). My tastes may be simple, but I found it hilarious. Highly recommended.

  37. 37.

    dslak

    January 6, 2008 at 4:05 pm

    Unfortunately, Romney seems to know where his support comes from, and acts accordingly. That’s why he’s the establishment candidate. There are some issues that McCain won’t negotiate on, like immigration reform, that completely alienate the right, so he’d have to appeal to the center to govern.

  38. 38.

    jprice vincenz

    January 6, 2008 at 4:30 pm

    That image, linked to above, of McCain hugging Bush is, indeed, one that we should all recall if McCain wins the nomination. It truly is akin to the image of (Charley Brown/Peanuts) Dukakis in the helmet in the tank. That image (plus Willie Horton and his response to Bernie Shaw about what he would feel if Kitty was raped–a whole other comment here about how f—-d up the media has long been) probably did more to define him as unthinkable-as-President. Remember, like Dukakis, McCain is not that bad of a guy either, but if an image like that began to define him, his likability would go out the window. Then he would just be unthinkable-as-President. There’s a lot of anger brewing around the country and the media will run whatever story damages best. Also, I want to see the GOP hit as hard by us as they have hit us in the last eight or nine years (or more, considering the repulsive orgy-of-Clinton-hate); taking out The Tool (especially if the establishment conservatives take out Huckabee and Paul, and sheer incompetence takes out Guliani, Thompson, and Romney) would be a delightful bit of cold-served revenge for me at least.

  39. 39.

    The Other Steve

    January 6, 2008 at 4:37 pm

    Hewitt is an idiot. He actually suggested a market downturn was due to Mittens not winning in Iowa.

    I’m fairly certain it was because of the job numbers, because that’s what they kept talking about.

    Granted, my opinion is reinforced by teh Libuhral media with articles like Weak Job Growth Numbers Prompt Stock Sell-off.

  40. 40.

    The Other Steve

    January 6, 2008 at 4:38 pm

    For those who want an innocent’s take on the Republican debate, there is this at the Great Orange Satan (AKA dKos).

    What do you think we are? Idiots?

    Everybody knows whot he Great Orange Satan is.

    Besides getting my check from soros, I sacrifice a virgin goat every morning to the Great Orange one.

  41. 41.

    EL

    January 6, 2008 at 4:43 pm

    Besides getting my check from soros, I sacrifice a virgin goat every morning to the Great Orange one.

    Shhhh, not so loud. I have seen some new names around here recently. If they demand their checks, we may get a smaller share.

    How do you go about determining the goat is a virgin?

  42. 42.

    TheFountainHead

    January 6, 2008 at 4:53 pm

    How do you go about determining the goat is a virgin?

    PotD

  43. 43.

    myiq2xu

    January 6, 2008 at 5:03 pm

    How do you go about determining the goat is a virgin?

    I recall a cartoon from the old “Sex to Sexty” magazine that shows a sheep talking to a farmer, and the caption says:

    “If you wanted virgin wool, you should have been here last week.”

  44. 44.

    Jake

    January 6, 2008 at 5:06 pm

    Shhhh, not so loud. I have seen some new names around here recently. If they demand their checks, we may get a smaller share.

    No. We’ll just have to sell more zygote-smoothies.

    Now where’s my check?

  45. 45.

    scott

    January 6, 2008 at 5:18 pm

    As a regular at the GOS, I was wondering who’d diverted the soros checks. Now I know. You bastards.

    Regarding Bob Dole: When I worked at the alert center in the Pentagon, you watched a lot of certain TV during the day, I got hooked on the Senate on CSpan so in the early 1990s, I watched Bob Dole a lot.

    And came to mightily respect the man and his very wicked sense of humor. Now, on the issues, I’d puke on his shows given the chance but one thing I came away with was that he had integrity. I now look back on him as one of the last old-school Repubs in the Senate, a dying if not extinct breed. A buddy of mine voted for him in the 96 election not so much cuz said buddy was a died in the wool Repub but because of the respect he had as an active duty Marine for Dole’s service to the country.

    I watched McCain a lot over the years as well, the Orrin Hatch 2.0 analogy is, well, perfect.

  46. 46.

    Brachiator

    January 6, 2008 at 6:05 pm

    I agree. Although, I still have this nagging voice at the back of my head (which I usually ignore or drown in alcohol) that says Romney might not actually be that bad. Sure, as a candidate, he’s pathetic, flip-flopping like a fish outta water on a hotplate. But like Andrew and Ross, when Romney’s not pandering and actually discussing ideas or policy, he sounds like a thinking man—-a man who knows how to solve problems and get shit done.

    I didn’t have any respect for Myth Romney before the debate, but after watching him in NH, I now despise him. The moment came for me when he jousted with Rudy and McCain about immigration (and the definition of the word, “amnesty”). The key exchange was this:

    MR. ROMNEY: Are they sent home?

    SEN. MCCAIN: They have to get in line —

    MR. ROMNEY: Are they sent home?

    SEN. MCCAIN: — behind everybody else.

    MR. ROMNEY: Are they sent home?

    Romney revealed himself here not just as an empty suit, but as the worst kind of coward who pumps himself up to bully those weaker than himself. This is a man who, after all, previously claimed that he could not be held responsible if someone working on his house hired illegal laborers. But now he is so tough that he tries to make it sound like he is personally going to go out and grab an illegal immigrant by the scruff of the neck and kick him out of the country.

    And while spitting this crap out of his mouth, he made sure to keep that smug, reptilian smile on his self-satisfied mugg.

    He expresses no ideas here. No hint of policy. No hint of thought. Just the flopsweat of a craven, desperate fool who will say anything, do anything, beat up on anybody to prove he is The Man.

    I will be extremely disappointed if the voters in New Hampshire don’t bitchslap Romney back into the slime in which he belongs.

  47. 47.

    Pb

    January 6, 2008 at 6:14 pm

    This summed it up nicely: The Republican debates according to a 9-year old.

  48. 48.

    Anne Laurie

    January 6, 2008 at 7:43 pm

    “Check out my new Mitt Romney pom-poms!”

    As long as they’re not Mitt Romney tassels. TBogg’s favorite photo of Hugh Hewitt’s sweaty man-boobs makes me urp every time I flash back on it.

    I’ve been saying for a while that McCain, bless the soul he sold to Teh Dark Side, was going to end up as this year’s Republican Unity candidate. He’s not flaming anathema to any of the six or seven different Repub factions now contending for power, and Republicans are fans of the “He’s always obeyed the rules, so now it’s His Turn” theory of poltical worth. Besides, even the hardcore Repubs are beginning to suspect that 2008 is going to be a mandate on Bush/Cheney, and nobody wants to date either of those men. So McCain gets to run as the Hopeless Sacrificial Elderly-Mutton-Dressed-As-Lamb, aka Bob Dole ver. 2008, with one of the younger drones (probably Romney) riding the VP spot on the promise of party support in 2012.

    “I still have this nagging voice at the back of my head (which I usually ignore or drown in alcohol) that says Romney might not actually be that bad… when Romney’s not pandering and actually discussing ideas or policy, he sounds like a thinking man—-a man who knows how to solve problems and get shit done.”

    Believe someone who had to live through four years of Willard’s half-arsed, back-and-forth, ooh-shiny attempts to “solve problems and get shit done” — that nagging voice is WRONG. Romney is the embodyment of CEO Wisdom, aka Dilbert’s Pointy-Haired Boss. He is a creature composed entirely of buzzwords, Powerpoint graphics, and a sense of entitlement that would dwarf Donald Trump. Sounding like a thinking man, he can achieve for brief periods, as long as he’s got a canned tape loop to roll, but it is a fact universally acknowledged that the longer people know Willard as a person, the less respect they have for him. Mitt took his daddy’s millions, turned them into mega-millions during a long career as the grip’n’grin figurehead for a combine of vulture capitalists siphoning Mormon tithes into profitable offshoring of American businesses, and let all those years of basking in the forced adulation of the underlings in his offices and his Mormon ‘stakeholding’ convince him that America needed his manly grin & beautiful profile in order to Feel Good again. He’s a nasty, selfish fvck who tortures the family dog in front of his traumatized kids, dismisses his sick wife’s health concerns as far less important than his own political ambitions, and then has the narcisstic gall to brag about his sociopathic behavior in his political advertising. The only difference between Dubya and Willard is that Mitt hasn’t spent the last 40 years as an open alcoholic and secret drug addict, so he doesn’t actually *look* like Dorian Grey’s portrait.

  49. 49.

    Psycheout

    January 6, 2008 at 7:55 pm

    He expresses no ideas here. No hint of policy. No hint of thought. Just the flopsweat of a craven, desperate fool who will say anything, do anything, beat up on anybody to prove he is The Man.

    An excellent description of Romney. Well done.

  50. 50.

    grumpy realist

    January 7, 2008 at 12:10 am

    Who was it who described Mitt Romney as “the teeth under the hair”?

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