Predictions.
Reader Interactions
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Come for the politics, stay for the snark.
Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”
One way or another, he’s a liar.
The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand.
In after Baud. Damn.
These are not very smart people, and things got out of hand.
It’s easy to sit in safety and prescribe what other people should be doing.
Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.
If you voted for Trump, you don’t get to speak about ethics, morals, or rule of law.
Accountability, motherfuckers.
When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.
He really is that stupid.
Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.
With all due respect and assumptions of good faith, please fuck off into the sun.
Shut up, hissy kitty!
Bark louder, little dog.
Incompetence, fear, or corruption? why not all three?
If you cannot answer whether trump lost the 2020 election, you are unfit for office.
When I was faster i was always behind.
There is no right way to do the wrong thing.
We are aware of all internet traditions.
The media handbook says “controversial” is the most negative description that can be used for a Republican.
I have other things to bitch about but those will have to wait.
Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.
Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.
wasabi gasp
I Fall Asleep for the win.
Incertus
I predict I will continue grading essays, and that they will either get much better or much worse depending on how soon I begin drinking.
demimondian
Alfredo Gonzales will fail to win, again, for his stellar turn as a charming, but forgetful, ex-attorney struggling with the effects of long-term KoolAid use.
TheFountainHead
I predict Barack Obama will win for Best Supporting Actor in a Tragedy.
calipygian
Hillary Clinton wins best actress for “The Crying Game”.
srv
I predict that we will not lose these two wars fast enough.
calipygian
George Bush wins Best Actor in a landslide in a reprise of the role that Cliff Robertson made famous in “Flowers for Algernon”. It was the role that Dubya was born to play.
srv
demi, you hear Stallman gave up component ownership of emacs?
It took him that long to figure out the key combo.
demimondian
srv —
Heh. Good line. No, I hadn’t heard.
calipygian —
What about the guy who did Bush’s stunt double in the middle, when his character was supposedly lucid? He surely deserves best supporting actor, doesn’t he?
Zuzu
Dunno about the winners, but Stewart’s monologue was pret-ty good.
myiq2xu
Barack Obama will later be stripped of his Oscar when it is discovered he was lip-synching.
Kynn
Prediction: Michael “I don’t drink anymore” Demmons just can’t help himself and cracks open a six-pack or two because of the Oscars.
jake
John McCain takes an Oscar for his role in “No country for old men.”
Mitt Romney takes one for “Best Special Effect.”
Scotty
I predict that good mileage will be gotten from this over the next few weeks.
Liberal Masochist
I predict the Clinton campaign will hire Anton Chigurh after tonight.
calipygian
I thought Dick Cheney WAS Anton Chigurh.
demimondian
Ob Disc: Romney’s victory will come for his star turn as the one live actor in Pixar’s Toy Story III, in which he played “Mr. Potatoehead Junior”.
John S.
Hillary Clinon will petition to have Obama stripped of his Oscar for Best Writing (Adapted Screenplay) on the grounds that he plagiarized the story his screenplay was based on.
Liberal Masochist
calipygian – you may be right. In a recent speech, Chehey referred to Vladimir Putin as “Friendo”
Ninerdave
I predict…I’m going to have another Talisker, level my Druid, and watch the WW I documentary I’ve been Tivoing.
myiq2xu
Betcha Tweety gets very polite if they do.
And she’ll be a slam dunk to win in November cuz this will be no country for old men.
Pb
I predict that the sky will open, the light will come down, celestial choirs will be signing “Yes, We Can!”, and all the awards will go to Barack Obama.
myiq2xu
And somebody in the front row will faint.
Liberal Masochist
Ninerdave – try a Lagavulin 16 or a nice Highland Park 18. Yum.
myiq2xu
I prefer the Yokohama 78 – It’s better than the 69 because you get 8 more
Jen
Whoever let Tilda Swinton out of the house like that needs to be drawn and quartered.
jdogg333
While the Oscars were on 60 Minutes ran a story of Alabama Governor Don Siegelman. The video is on the web now. The White House blocked the first attempt to air this but it finally got aired during the Oscars.
Here’s the link:http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/02/21/60minutes/main3859830.shtml
reply
calipygian
The Coens were so freakin’ high.
Liberal Masochist
myiq – why does Michael Jackson like to have sex with twenty-five year olds?
A: because there are twenty-five of them!
(rim shot)
TheFountainHead
Seconded.
TheFountainHead
PS. Whoever the lighting designer was this year should be drug out back and shot. Atrocious.
myiq2xu
What do Michael Jackson and Sears have in common?
A: they both have little boys jeans half-off!
jake
Fuck the Oscars, Chris Rock is on Comedy Central.
p.lukasiak
No Country for Old Men — the Obama campaign slogan if he gets the nomination
There Will Be Blood — Pundits discussing the February 26th debate
Atonement — Barack Obama explains support for making handguns illegal, encouraging welfare moms to have more babies, completely unrestricted access to abortion for everyone, and hanging out with unrepentent terrorist bombers
Juno — the story of a happy-go-lucky candidate who finds himself in a really difficult situation, but everything turns out okay in the end like it always does in the movies
Michael Clayton — what? You expect me to come up with something snide with THAT title?
Cain
I hear Larry Craig won best tap dancer in a bathroom.
cain
Krista
Random thoughts thus far:
John Travolta’s hairline looks like somebody drew it on with a Sharpie.
Tilda looked rather ghastly, but her acceptance speech was amusing.
Sad that Ellen Page didn’t win (yay, fellow Nova Scotian girl!), but I wasn’t really expecting her to, so what are you gonna do? Marion Cotillard was adorable in her acceptance speech.
Can I just say that it really irks me that the presenters get more time to talk than the actual winners do? Cut down on the cutesy, oh-so-precious presentation banter (or cut it out altogether), and give the winners 15 more seconds. It’s not like most of them will ever get a chance to be up there ever again.
Cate Blanchett always looks phenomenal, and George Clooney is really the only one there who looks as comfortable in a tux as he would in his pyjamas. Not that I’ve seen George in his pyjamas…yet. A girl can still dream.
Why does Renee Zelwegger always purse her lips like she just sucked a lemon? And her haircut…yikes!
Is it wrong that I can’t stop staring at Nicole Kidman’s forehead, looking for signs of movement? Nope. Didn’t see any.
myiq2xu
I never understood why she gets so much attention. It’s not that she’s unattractive or a bad actress, but she’s not anything special.
The Grand Panjandrum
And why was she wearing the tinsel from her Christmas tree?
myiq2xu
Krista is definitely female.
Most guys are only vaguely aware that Kidman even has a forehead.
TR
I thought it had been sprayed out of a Krylon can, but that’s pretty close.
zmulls
OMG….that guy..Jon McLaughlin…can *not* sing….
Krista
Yikes! Cameron Diaz is orange!
zmulls
And Jon Stewarts is a class act for letting that songwriter come out and do her thank you after getting cut off….
DougJ
So far this Award Ceremony is bad news for Democrats.
chopper
overall, i’d have to say the oscars have been a big win for hillary.
jake
Careful now. If the lights hit the snowy slope of Kidman’s brow the right way your retinas will be toast. Why do you think Cruise squints like that?
jeffreyw
Not to be missed: Horton on the CBS 60 Minutes Siegelman expose.
jeffreyw
damn it all
Horton: http://harpers.org/archive/2008/02/hbc-90002487
Ninerdave
Oh yeah, had ’em both, love ’em. On a peaty kick at the moment.
Brachiator
Better punch line: because there are twenty of them.
I liked when the woman from “Once” came back onstage and gave her acceptance speech about the importance of dreams and hope. Edited out of the broadcast was Hillary Clinton rushing out, slapping the poor woman down with her own Oscar, and shouting “Get real! Get serious!”
I seriously liked when troops in Iraq gave out an Oscar. Look for the inevitable conservative wingnut spin later tonight and all day tomorrow.
Ninerdave
Alright here’s a question for all the Oscar buffs. It’s a question that you’re not going to be able to answer to my satisfaction, I promise, but I’ll pose it anyway.
Why do you care? What does it matter? Especially the Red Carpet. WTF? Who cares what people are dressing like.
I gave up on award shows when Jethro Tull got the first “Heavy Metal” grammy, beating out Metallica. Award shows do not reflect the best of the year, they reflect something…I’m not sure what.
I ask this as someone who is peripherally involved in the music and movie biz. Who cares what the Academy thinks?
And what is up with “celebrity” worship in this country? My wife gets People and I flip though it occationally: my IQ drops 2x (pun intendend) when I look at it.
Maxim has more meat in it than People.
So explain this too me? Anyone?
jeffreyw
Horton?
Xanthippas
I third. If you guys haven’t seen this yet, you should.
myiq2xu
I never read people, as you may have guessed.
SmilingPolitely
I’m a sucker for the nominee that cries. Yes, I’m an uber-pansy.
Hillary is an exception, of course, as her tears are pumped in via artificial tubing installed in her stupid face.
Martin
I wonder if we are nearing the point that the Republican Party could just be indicted under RICO laws? The Siegelman story, along with the DOJ and voter suppression story, taken as a whole really starts to smack of organized crime. These aren’t acts of individuals but large collaborative efforts to break the law.
Brachiator
Someone might easily ask, who gives a rat’s ass about Jethro Tull?
Of course, the answer is that what gives us pleasure is personal, and nothing much is gained by insisting that anyone justify his or her preferences.
I watch the Oscars, but pretty much forget about them the next day. However, I do enjoy seeing talented people like Daniel Day Lewis recognized for his talents. I was even impressed by the award given to 98 year old veteran production designer Robert Boyle, and noted that he for years inspired new generations of film makers at AFI.
Apparently, Maxim has its share of outright fraud as well, judging from this recent news story:
The full story can be found here:
Black Crowes say Maxim review a fraud
So explain this to me? Anyone?
By the way here is a piece of Best Original Song co-winner Marketa Irglova’s belatedly given Oscar speech. (P.S. Don’t tell Hillary Clinton, because it’s all about dreams and hope):
Mary
My favourite part of the Oscars was Tilda Swinton is all her redheaded, shiny-faced, glorious eccentricity. I’m usually one to rag on bad fashion, but she stepped sideways instead of trying too hard (I’m looking at you, Nicole and Cameron!) and I adored her for it.
Otherwise, it was pretty boring. I found someone else to do this evening and caught up with the show on fast-forward. The lack of time for a full writing job showed. I’m glad they tried, but this won’t go down as one of the classics.
Zuzu
I don’t get it either. Her acting just seems to consist of turning her head different ways while pursing her lips.
Although I have to say her take on the Kim Novak character in “Vertigo” for this month’s Vanity Fair is pretty great.
Zuzu
As I recall they were quick and loud in complaining about the lack of shout-outs to the troops in at least one prior show.
Zuzu
I always love the reactions of the moms and spouses and kids when someone’s name is called. Real human beings, and all.
I loved where the camera just almost caught Frances McDormand putting her fingers in her mouth for a big ol’ whistle when her Coen hubby was leaving the stage.
Pooh
Poor wardrobe choice by Diablo…
Asti
RE: Siegelman story
I just sent two emails to TZ in regarding the AL blackout, but I’m going to copy and paste the second one here:
Huffington Post
Second Email:
WKYT blames network for last-minute blackout
Okay, get this:
I did a search of “Alabama Blackout” thinking I was searching the parameters of the story I just sent you (the Siegelman segment on CBS 60 Minutes being blacked out in parts of Alabama, Tennessee and Florida – on station WHNT in Huntsville, AL) and I had found links to Harpers Magazine (linked on BJ, where I initially found the link to the story, I learned of the blackout on the Harper’s page) and when I did that search I mentioned above, I found that there was another blackout of a CBS affiliate WKYT-27 (a different CBS station in the same viewing area – Alabama, Tennessee and Florida) on Saturday afternoon during the final minutes of a college basketball game which created havoc for the viewers who called and complained, and a news story was created about it on the link at the top of this email.
I did a search and found some info on Huffington Post which also referenced a link to Democratic Underground in the comments (I don’t like using DU but, there were viewers from the area who were putting up the crawler message on the black screen in that viewing area which stated that there was a technical difficulty at the CBS NY control center (which only affected people in the Alabama/Tennessee/Florida – read Local Siegelman) area and nowhere else. The info on DU states that calls were made to CBS-NY to ask if the blackout glitch was their fault and they said that the station was not being truthful and that if any blackout occurred, it occurred due to problems in Alabama. The info I found on the Siegelman segment blackout states that the station returned to normal broadcasting not long after the Siegelman segment was over (12 minutes into the show I think it said).
Here is my theory:
A request came through from someone very influential in AL or Washington (Karl Rove’s people?) on Saturday to WKYT-27 stating they needed to black out the station on Sunday night during the Siegelman segment and they did not read the memo carefully and blacked out the game on Saturday rather than the 60 Mins segment on Sunday (or maybe they blacked that out too, a second CBS station in the same area, nobody is reporting what that station aired last night). WKYT-27 also blamed the blackout of the basketball game on a technical glitch at CBS NY.
What do you think?
This is a huge censorship issue, I think this needs to be pushed as much as possible.
Asti
Here is the Democratic Underground link to the story
jake
???
Whoa. Dude.
My WTFoMeter just blew up.
I’m going to make an “educated guess” that the staff at Maxim runs around in big girl’s panties and have inflatable sheep in their cubicles.
But you know what? This country is still being run by people who invaded a country for one reason and when that reason turned out to be a big fucking lie, they shrugged and said “Hey, we guessed wrong. Sue us.” So in the grand scheme of Suck, an “educated guess,” about a record release is only such a brief fleeting teeny tiny suck a spider wouldn’t enjoy it.