Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Everybody saw this coming.

When your entire life is steeped in white supremacy, equality feels like discrimination.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

Why is it so hard for them to condemn hate?

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

The next time the wall wtreet journal editorial board speaks the truth will be the first.

They’re not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

Consistently wrong since 2002

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

Infrastructure week. at last.

Hot air and ill-informed banter

Americans barely caring about Afghanistan is so last month.

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

People are complicated. Love is not.

Let’s delete this post and never speak of this again.

After roe, women are no longer free.

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

“But what about the lurkers?”

In my day, never was longer.

I was promised a recession.

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

You are here: Home / Humorous / I Am Aware of All Internet Traditions

I Am Aware of All Internet Traditions

by | 167 Comments

This post is in: ,

This may be the greatest thread in the history of the intertrons.

Long story short, D at Lawyers, Guns and Money writes a “Shorter Geraldine Ferraro Neo-neocon” in which the neo-neocon post is summarized, and a troll comes along and states:

As a participant in the thread that follows the link to neoneocon, I should like to point out that the quote you excerpted

does not exist

in neoneocon’s post. Nor does it exist in the comments.

When the shorter concept is explained to him, he/she responds:

I am aware of all internet traditions and also of literary conventions in which placing something in quotes or in a blockquote means that your are quoting that person.

But here you are not.

It seems to me that what your are about is, well, sort of questionable.

Can you please expand on the idea your propose that putting something in blockquotes that does not appear at the linked item is a fair thing to do.

I am laughing so hard there are tears streaming down my face. Epic.

*** Update ***

Yes.

Reader Interactions

167Comments

  3. 3.

    Zifnab

    It’s also worth noting that even if that quote had been in the linked piece, the kerning was off.

  7. 7.

    joe

    In the spirit of that criticism, may I just say,

    “STRAWMAN! STRAWMAN! THAT’S A STRAWMAN!!!!1!1!eleven!!

    When you’re ready to have a serious conversation about the status of concubines on the Ferengi homeworld, you know where to find me.”

  8. 8.

    Lee

    And in the comments to that post, someone had to bring up 2 Girls and 1 Cup, which I didn’t know anything about. I Googled it. I regret it. Sometimes the intertubes can lead you to some disturbing places.

  10. 10.

    Incertus

    Phrase of the day: “I am aware of all internet traditions.”

    With any luck, that will become the next “all your base are belong to us.”

  13. 13.

    jibeaux

    Also, ten bucks says said troll is not aware of the MUP.

    In internet tradition, I don’t actually have to tender the money, right?

  14. 14.

    ThatLeftTurnInABQ

    Phrase of the day: “I am aware of all internet traditions.”

    In the Soviet Union, all internet traditions are aware of you.

  16. 16.

    jake

    All UR traditions R belong 2 Us.

    Please God, let this be someone who speaks EaaSL. Otherwise I’ll have to feel sorry for the poor bastard with a telephone pole up his ass.

  18. 18.

    Stooleo

    The teeshirt needs to have a picture of Leonard Nimoy saying “I am aware of all internet traditions”

    I’d buy it !

  19. 19.

    Punchy

    THe neo-neocon bitch is deleting posts.

    I wrote something somewhat snarky, not even that funny, and it was gone in 3 minutes. Three damn minutes to the dustbin. It confirms…she’s a Republican!

  20. 20.

    Xanthippas

    I thought I was the only idiot liberal who visited that dump of a blog on a regular basis (Neo, not LGM) so I was quite pleased to see that post get some attention at LGM, and now one of the idiot commentators on the LGM post get some attention here. The comment thread at Neo, usually filled with rabid right-wingers who supplicate before the awesome wisdom of Neo herself, is now rapidly filling up with comments from those who’re visiting from the LGM post and firing off drive-by snark and mocking. And why not? The reason I’ve commented at Neo so regularly is because it’s the rhetorical equivalent of shooting fish in a barrel. I’m glad to see some others getting in on the fun.

  22. 22.

    Dennis - SGMM

    I’d love to hear, “I am aware of all Internet traditions,” in the Cylon voice from the original BSG.

  23. 23.

    Jon H

    “The teeshirt needs to have a picture of Leonard Nimoy saying “I am aware of all internet traditions”

    Or Doctor Theopolis from Buck Rogers, the little round-face supercomputer that Twiki wore like Flava Flav’s clock.

  24. 24.

    LS

    What makes it even better is that the idiot appears to be Gerard “I Make Fun of Cancer Patients” Van De Leun. Either that or someone trying to make him look really stupid. But if it is Van Der Leun, he’s no noob.

  25. 25.

    Xanthippas

    THe neo-neocon bitch is deleting posts.

    Yeah, she does that now, which is why you won’t see any of my comments either. But you guys should at least make her work at it a little bit. Give her plenty to delete.

  26. 26.

    Jon H

    What’s hilarious is that Mr “Aware Of All Internet Traditions” apparently used to run Penthouse’s internet operations.

  28. 28.

    RSA

    THe neo-neocon bitch is deleting posts.

    I wrote something somewhat snarky, not even that funny, and it was gone in 3 minutes. Three damn minutes to the dustbin. It confirms…she’s a Republican!

    But that can’t be! She writes,

    Because this post was linked by a few blogs to the Left, the trolls have come out in the comments section. I’ve left up all their comments, even the most offensive ones, to demonstrate, once again, the caliber and tenor of the “arguments.” The comments themselves demonstrate the nature of the people posting, and need no further description.

  29. 29.

    Rome Again

    Also, OT, but HOLY SHIT! That’s a swan dive off the deep end if ever I saw one.

    I no longer have any faith in the human race.

  32. 32.

    jenniebee

    Neo-neocon’s commenters are just so preciously precocious, too:

    FredHjr Says:

    John McCain raping a goat is highly unlikely, since he is not Muslim. It’s not an apt analogy, since it falls entirely out of the realm of what we know to be the supporting facts that attend goatf***ing. On the other hand, we have read statements from Michelle Obama and are familiar with her views from other sources which would make the “hating whitey tape” not entirely out of the realm of possibility.

    If your gonna use “tu quoque” forms of argument, then the analogies you use should be constructed using more than just a pro forma approach.

    But, I guess our education system has indeed devolved to the point where college graduates today would never pass the classic regimen from another era.

    Summing up:

    It’s a known fact that only Muslims blow goats, so ipso facto, hocus pocus, because shut up, that’s why, John McCain probably hasn’t blown goats.
    Is it responsible to speculate about Mrs. Obama’s plans, re: killing whitey? It would be irresponsible not to!
    I know two Latin phrases, neither of which is argumentum ad absurdum.
    “Classic” is not necessarily the same as “from another era.”
    S-M-R-T! I mean S-M-A-R-T!

  33. 33.

    John in Chicago

    “And in the comments to that post, someone had to bring up 2 Girls and 1 Cup, which I didn’t know anything about. I Googled it. I regret it. Sometimes the intertubes can lead you to some disturbing places.”

    Whatever you do, do not do a google image search for “tub girl”. Just. Don’t.

  34. 34.

    Dan

    Punchy Says:

    THe neo-neocon bitch is deleting posts.

    I wrote something somewhat snarky, not even that funny, and it was gone in 3 minutes.

    Mine too. It was just sarcastic, no profanity. Poof. Gone in about 2 minutes.

  35. 35.

    Rome Again

    I think we are one notch away from lint examination.

    Well, I dunno TZ, bellybutton lint inspection can be quite interesting, if you get my drift! ;)

  37. 37.

    jibeaux

    Google currently has only 7 hits for I am aware of all Internet traditions

    Interestingly, the original source doesn’t seem to come up.

    Perhaps this is an internet tradition.

    If only there were someone I could ask…

  39. 39.

    John Cole

    What the hell is wrong with you all that you insist on calling women a bitch?

    For christ sakes, could you knock it off? Jesus. It really pisses me off, and there is no need to making yourself look like a sexist jackass.

    Additionally, every time one of you shitheads does that, someone else invariably will claim that I condone that bullshit, when I clearly do not.

  40. 40.

    Dennis - SGMM

    Is “Neo-neocon,” a visit to the Department of Redundancy Department, stuttering, or shorthand for “stupid, squared”?

  42. 42.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    What the hell is wrong with you all that you insist on calling women a bitch?

    For christ sakes, could you knock it off? Jesus. It really pisses me off, and there is no need to making yourself look like a sexist jackass.

    Thanks. This WAS a great thread until that comment. Took the wind right out of the old comedic sails.

  43. 43.

    Dennis - SGMM

    Neo-neocon’s commenters are just so preciously precocious, too:

    jenniebee, Phrenology Majors need love too.

  44. 44.

    Dan

    I didn’t call her a bitch, I just blockquoted Punchy. Sorry. You are right. I will be more careful and hopefully Punchy will be more thoughtful.
    And the neoneocon woman is a shithead. K?

  46. 46.

    demimondian

    I am aware of all internet traditions.

    Which, unfortunately, include hot grits, Natalie Portman, Ogg the Cavemen, and the fact the I must be new here.

  47. 47.

    BH-Buck

    What the hell is wrong with you all that you insist on calling women a bitch?…

    You’re right, “bitch” is a tad bit strong here.

    But what do you call someone who just deleted your post? Who gagged you? Who silenced you? Who said “phuck you” when you voiced your opinion?

    Too far? Perhaps. But there are a lot of people out there who would have said far worse.

  48. 48.

    demimondian

    Which, unfortunately, include hot grits, Natalie Portman, Ogg the Cavemen, and the fact the I must be new here.

    And that, of course, will bring the End of the Net As We Know It.

    So why don’t you just take it to alt.flame?

  49. 49.

    Punchy

    What the hell is wrong with you all that you insist on calling women a bitch?

    I agree. I’m glad that word is never spoken here. Clearly it’s not appropriate for someone who is wantonly trying to defame a public figure, using the absolutely absurd arguing style of “I’m glad there’s not a video of MO having a gang-bang, but if there was, it’s clear she’s a slut”.

    Yes, we must reserve such language for people who deserve it. My apologies to the polite, fair, intellectually honest, and clearly-isnt-a-liar cuz she doesn’t delete comments even though she does.

    Show a little class, you jackasses.

  50. 50.

    Face

    Additionally, every time one of you shitheads does that, someone else invariably will claim that I condone that bullshit, when I clearly do not.

    Maybe you should delete Punchy’s comments. So we can call you an asshole for doing so. Except that’s not condoned by you, so you’d have to delete that, too.

    It’s good to have sterile comments section. Maybe Father Fondlekids will be able to read this entire post in church on Sunday!

  51. 51.

    John Cole

    But what do you call someone who just deleted your post? Who gagged you? Who silenced you? Who said “phuck you” when you voiced your opinion?

    How about asshole?

    Clearly it’s not appropriate for someone who is wantonly trying to defame a public figure, using the absolutely absurd arguing style of “I’m glad there’s not a video of MO having a gang-bang, but if there was, it’s clear she’s a slut”.

    So your only response is to call her a bitch? I can think of a number of things to call people who do that, without having to resort to the bottom rung of sexist insults.

  52. 52.

    BethanyAnne

    Lee Says:
    And in the comments to that post, someone had to bring up 2 Girls and 1 Cup, which I didn’t know anything about. I Googled it. I regret it. Sometimes the intertubes can lead you to some disturbing places.

    new favorite guild name: “Two Gruuls One Cup”

  53. 53.

    Pb

    I am aware of all internet traditions.

    Which, unfortunately, include hot grits, Natalie Portman, Ogg the Cavemen, and the fact the I must be new here.

    You must be new here — you forgot The Glorious MEEPT!!, you insensitive clod! However, I for one welcome our newbie overlords.

  54. 54.

    BH-Buck

    I think I did say that “Bitch” was a tad bit strong.

    The guy just had a comment deleted (which I think is a damn big deal), then caught hell here. Just not his day I reckon.

    Would have been nice to have witnessed a bit understanding.

  55. 55.

    cleek

    if i had an ounce of graphic design talent (or if the GIMP’s font selection dialog didn’t render the entire application useless), i’d whip up a little graphic badge to certify that the owner of a website is, in fact, aware of all internet traditions.

  56. 56.

    John Cole

    new favorite guild name: “Two Gruuls One Cup”

    My personal favorite alliance guild names were:

    “At Least We Took Stables”

    and

    “She Swore She Was Level 18”

  58. 58.

    Incertus

    Would have been nice to have witnessed a bit understanding.

    The understanding thing would be not to grouse about it when the host asks you not to use sexist slurs. Hell, Obsidian Wings asks that you not use curse words in the comments, and everyone there (once they see the rule) tends to follow them. It’s called being courteous to your host.

  60. 60.

    John D.

    Favorite WOW guild name, ever.

    “AFK on your sister” — On Demon Soul, a PvP server.

  61. 61.

    Dennis - SGMM

    The understanding thing would be not to grouse about it when the host asks you not to use sexist slurs.

    Absolutely, but they’ll pry my misanthropy from my cold, dead fingers!

  62. 62.

    John Cole

    Favorite WOW guild name, ever.

    “AFK on your sister” —On Demon Soul, a PvP server.

    There was a horde guild named “Your Mom Is My Epic Mount” on a server I was on a few years ago.

  64. 64.

    Punchy

    The understanding thing would be not to grouse about it when the host asks you not to use sexist slurs. Hell, Obsidian Wings asks that you not use curse words in the comments, and everyone there (once they see the rule) tends to follow them. It’s called being courteous to your host.

    Thanks, Dad.

  65. 65.

    jake

    It’s almost as funny as the AP talking about the spirit of the internet.

    Like the Spirit of Radio.

    But with 110% more nudity.

  66. 66.

    Shinobi

    She could also be a douche bag, and asshat or less profanely a tyrant.

    (Actually I think if you called her a tyrannical bitch it would seem less sexist as you are specifically referencing her slightly evil action of subjugating your right to free speech.)

  67. 67.

    jenniebee

    When I debated in college, I had it explained to me very succinctly. There are fewer women than men in Debate Clubs because when a guy beats you he’s a hella good debater; when a woman beats you, she’s a bitch. Cynthia Heimel said it perfectly: a bitch is a woman a man can’t control. She doesn’t have to do anything particularly emasculating or defiant or even gender-aware to qualify – a mild competitive drive, a soupcon of personal ambition, or even your garden-variety independent streak is all that’s required to achieve bitchiness.

    Neo-neocon, however, is an insecure, self-deluded tool. Don’t drag us bitches down to her level.

  68. 68.

    jon

    How big a step is is from “I am aware of all internet traditions” to “Why do you assume I like Rick Astley?”

  72. 72.

    MR Bill

    I’m struck by the Pythonesque quality of vanderleun’s trip:
    came to have an argument and instead got ‘being hit in the head lessons’.

    And the deathless phrase “I am aware of all internet traditions” lends itself to paraphrase:
    “I am aware of all Negro traditions”..
    (not that that makes much more sense).

  74. 74.

    sidereal

    John Cole Says:

    …all…women…bitch

    …Jesus…really pisses me off, and…is…a sexist jackass.

    …I condone that bullshit…

    Busted.

  75. 75.

    Martin

    And it was about that time that Gerard Vanderleun ( Editor-in-Chief of Pajamas Media) wrote possibly the only post he will ever be remembered for, an attack on Jane that contained this brilliant quote that I’m sure Vanderleun thought was tres droll:

    So, if anyone here needs help with their internet traditions, just let John know and he can kick it up the sponsor chain.

  76. 76.

    horatius

    How about a Masters degree in “All Internet Traditions”. We surely seem to have the foremost expert in the world with us.

  78. 78.

    sidereal

    I haven’t seen that one since the mid-Nineties.

    I’ll take Mr “I am aware” in an Internet-tradition-off any day of the week. I’ll start with alt.pave.the.earth and have him begging for mercy before we even make it to Mahir.

  79. 79.

    Dork

    What’s with the apple-in-front-of-her-mug shot all about? Is there some symbolism that connects a Granny Smith to a douchebag?

    I simply cannot wait for Nov. 5. I’m taking the day off of work, just so I can devote the entire day to trolling the wingers’ blogs, watching heads explode all over the place. If Mrs. Obama’s 20+ year-old college thesis is all they have on Barry Obama….well….damn….they’re toast.

  81. 81.

    Zifnab

    I am aware of all internet traditions

    /me slaps “Participant” in the face with a large trout

  82. 82.

    MNPundit

    I declare this an open thread:

    I also announce that Ice Road Truckers is back for Season 2, now!!

    HAHA!

  87. 87.

    Llelldorin

    And, in one of my proudest moments of nerdiness-beyond-the-call-of-geekery, the word “Are” appeared in purple, not blue, on my first visit to this thread.

    Follow the seventh comment with “No it’s a BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER…” and we may, indeed, be zooming in on “all Internet Traditions.” We just need the evil overlord list and some Babylon 5 light bulb jokes.

  88. 88.

    montysano

    OK, apparently I’m now banned and deleted at neo-neocon’s joint. No obscenity, no ad hominems.

    But I learned something: “democracy” and “liberty” are sneaky leftist code words for “communism”. Who knew?

  89. 89.

    Ninerdave

    Guild names:

    Our crits are real. (all girl guild)
    STDs are BOP.

    and agree with above It hurts when I PvP is teh awesome.

    There was a guy running around my server with the name of “Sh” and the guild tag of

    That was pretty great.

  92. 92.

    Tim (The Other One)

    “I Am All Internet Traditions.”

    awesome MST3K subliminal reference. Indeed, central to your point.

  93. 93.

    Soylent Green

    What’s with the apple-in-front-of-her-mug shot all about? Is there some symbolism that connects a Granny Smith to a douchebag?

    She lifted it from a famous painting by the artist Rene Magritte.

  94. 94.

    demimondian

    alt.pave.the.earth

    Mercy.

    Then again, Pb — you might want to think about who actually *wront* MEEPT!

    — demi “cuz I sure won’t fess to OGG” mondian

  95. 95.

    A Different JC

    So the guy Vanderlun is real? I did a quick google for the name and came across this website (which is apparently about politics and pictures of women in hot-pants).

    However, he does link to this website which is totally awesome: Make your own Obama Poster.

    And to save you time “I am aware of all internet traditions” is too long for the web-widget. Maybe someone with better art can do it tho.

  96. 96.

    sidereal

    Llelldorin Says:

    And, in one of my proudest moments of nerdiness-beyond-the-call-of-geekery, the word “Are” appeared in purple, not blue, on my first visit to this thread.

    Frequent hampsterdance visitor, are we?

  97. 97.

    Shygetz

    I picture him saying it in a C3PO voice.

    I can think of a number of things to call people who do that, without having to resort to the bottom rung of sexist insults.

    I always pictured “bitch” as a sex-specific insult, not a sexist insult. Kinda like “dick” is a sex-specific insult, but I wouldn’t think it sexist against men.

  100. 100.

    lorri

    From reading the comments on Neo-Coochie’s article, I learn that:

    “Bitch” is out. “Conspiracy minded racist cooch” is in.

    And could someone please post a link to the video of John McCain raping the goat?

    Whoo-ee, the things you learn about on conservative blogs!

  101. 101.

    Seanly

    She could also be a douche bag

    Wouldn’t that be sexist also? Let’s all just agree that she is a stupid asshat.

  102. 102.

    Incontinentia Buttocks

    One likes to believe in the freedom of music
    But glittering prizes and endless compromises
    Shatter the illusion of integrity
    Yeah!

    Damn you, Mary! Now I’ll have this running through my head for the rest of the day…

    Of salesman…of SALESmen…of SALESMEN!

  103. 103.

    cornbread

    And in the comments to that post, someone had to bring up 2 Girls and 1 Cup, which I didn’t know anything about. I Googled it. I regret it. Sometimes the intertubes can lead you to some disturbing places.

    that was me. and you’re welcome.

  104. 104.

    Laertes

    But what do you call someone who just deleted your post? Who gagged you? Who silenced you? Who said “phuck you” when you voiced your opinion?

    Call her an asshole. It’s offensive and crude, but gender-neutral.

  105. 105.

    pharniel

    jenniebee Says:

    When I debated in college, I had it explained to me very succinctly. There are fewer women than men in Debate Clubs because when a guy beats you he’s a hella good debater; when a woman beats you, she’s a bitch. Cynthia Heimel said it perfectly: a bitch is a woman a man can’t control. She doesn’t have to do anything particularly emasculating or defiant or even gender-aware to qualify – a mild competitive drive, a soupcon of personal ambition, or even your garden-variety independent streak is all that’s required to achieve bitchiness

    In my high school days the debate team was in the vast majority of women.
    ‘bitch’ then was the other girl who refused to be beat like she should have been.

    it’s not just men that use it as a term of control/dominance.

  107. 107.

    Brachiator

    John Cole Says:

    So your only response is to call her a bitch? I can think of a number of things to call people who do that, without having to resort to the bottom rung of sexist insults.

    With all due respect (and I echo your distaste for this word), the b-word ain’t even in the middle rung of sexist insults.

    Trollop, for instance. Now there’s an insult.

    Laertes Says:

    Call her an asshole. It’s offensive and crude, but gender-neutral.

    The funny thing is that the b-word is becoming gender neutral (in the current PG-13 rated Adam Sandler movie, “You Don’t Mess With the Zohan,” the word is only used to describe male characters).

    But linguistic traditions evolve faster than all the internet traditions.

  108. 108.

    HyperIon

    But there are a lot of people out there who would have said far worse.

    i’m sure your momma is very proud (NOT).

  109. 109.

    warcabbit

    ARMM: ARMM: ARMM: ARMM:

    September never ended

    Serdar Argic is a Turkey.

    Man, there’s a lot of internet traditions. Heck, foo, bar, baz, qux, even.

  110. 110.

    Blue Raven

    Then again, Pb—you might want to think about who actually wront MEEPT! —demi “cuz I sure won’t fess to OGG” mondian

    KIBO!

    *looks around expectantly*

  112. 112.

    redbeardjim

    I got email from Ted Holden once. I was so proud.

    And I’m fond of “And Two Stealthed Rogues” as a guild name.

  113. 113.

    redbeardjim

    “UN-Altered REPRODUCTION and DISSEMINATION of this IMPORTANT INFORMATION is Encouraged.”

  117. 117.

    BethanyAnne

    and since my guild apparently imploded last night, I may have to re-create my toon’s old one. I can’t claim credit for the name, but I hadn’t seen it as a guild. The toon is “Floozie”, and the guild is “Fist me like a Muppet”

    :-D

  118. 118.

    Jess

    Cynthia Heimel said it perfectly: a bitch is a woman a man can’t control.

    I LOVE Heimel’s “bitch” rant! When I hear a guy use that term, I always want to comment “you say ‘bitch’ like it’s a bad thing…”

    Don’t waste compliments like ‘bitch’ on that Neo-Neocon twit.

  121. 121.

    A Different JC

    Michael Says: By popular demand:

    Poifect, Michael. Thanks.

    JoshA Says: A different JC, very funny. Now how about one with McCain?

    I’d be all over it if I knew how to program

  123. 123.

    rawshark

    Laertes Says:

    But what do you call someone who just deleted your post? Who gagged you? Who silenced you? Who said “phuck you” when you voiced your opinion?

    Call her an asshole. It’s offensive and crude, but gender-neutral.

    Gender neutral? Why would you call a woman by a gender neutral insult? If I called a woman an asshole her first reaction ought to be ‘asshole?! do I look like a man to you?’.

  125. 125.

    Thom

    That was an awesome comment by vanderleun. I imagine a robot voice saying “I am aware of all internet traditions”.

    Josh E. | 06.17.08 – 12:45 am |

    That’s exactly what I thought. But I pictured the kid who pretended he was Data on The Next Generation.

  128. 128.

    Tom

    “UN-Altered REPRODUCTION and DISSEMINATION of this IMPORTANT INFORMATION is Encouraged.”

    I’m so glad I put down my glass of wine before reading this. I’d be pretty busy cleaning up stuff otherwise.

  130. 130.

    Calouste

    Chet Scoville Says:

    Chuck Norris is aware of invented all internet traditions.

    June 17th, 2008 at 10:43 pm

    Truthified.

  131. 131.

    rachel

    Chet Scoville Says:

    Chuck Norris is aware of all internet traditions.

    There’s gotta be a macro for that.

  132. 132.

    V

    It is grammatically incorrect to refer to someone who has no genitals with a sex-specific insult. So there.

  133. 133.

    hysperia

    Here’s what Melissa MacEwan at Shakesville has to say about the use of douchebag:

    “Actually, douching was a terribly anti-woman practice designed to make women feel ashamed about their natural body odor. Repeated douching can wash away the lining of the uterus, making it not just pointless but dangerous. So, when one needs a word to describe, say, our pointless and dangerous president, one would be hard-pressed to find a better word than douchebag.”

    Much better than “bitch” frankly and John Cole I’ve never seen a guy blogger take this question up, thanks. It was the only low point, for me, in an otherwise great night!

    “Women for Internet Tradition Awareness” [WITA]

  134. 134.

    HeartlandLiberal

    Since I AM aware of all Internet traditions, I will point out that the first letter in the word “Internet” is what some of us in the trade call a “big letter”.

  135. 135.

    Xanthippas

    By popular demand:

    I am aware of all internet traditions.

    Oh man, this is freaking awesome. Thanks to LGM and Balloon Juice, I’m going to witness the birth of a new internet meme. I can tell people I was right there at the beginning, and I’ll be able to PROVE it as long as Cole doesn’t delete my comments just to be mean.

    Okay, those of you with blogs: Google currently has only 7 hits for I am aware of all Internet traditions. Time to get to work.

    362 and counting, as of about 10 seconds ago.

  139. 139.

    Lockwood

    OK, I’ve seen several references to this today. After being offline for a couple of days, I was a little baffled, but assumed it was some obscure viral situation. I appreciate finally getting the backstory: it’s like a good hot sauce. At first it just seemed pathetic, then the humor became more and more intense, until I burst out laughing. Thanks! The point of the comment is that two lines occur to me:

    Traditions!???? YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRADITIONS!!!

    Hmmm… You know, I’ve been to every single page on the internet, and I’ve never seen the traditions listed anywhere.

  140. 140.

    LanceThruster

    Though this thread is now old I hope this can be continued anew somewhere else.

    Vanderleun claims to be “aware of all internet traditions”, yet one that is most sacrosanct in my mind is the understanding that one does not “doctor” someone else’s posts or comments. There is enough problem having to stand by/defend every single thing one has written on the intrawebs, but when one has to deal with an unethical and unprincipled siteowner changing comments for his or her own amusement (and more importantly because he or she is receiving a royal ass whuppin’), then that goes against the Pirate Code.
    I hereby accuse master Vanderleun, and his crappy site “American Digest” of breaking Article III of the Pirate Code (Edward Low and George Lowther version) whereby: “III. He that shall be found Guilty of Cowardice in the time of engagements, shall suffer what Punishment the Captain and the Majority of the Company shall think fit.”

    [EXHIBIT #1] – “I love Jane, Wolcott kicks ass, and Kos is the most!

    And you? Even more than the three rocket scientists above. You are better than all three combined.

    Thanks for the larf male and single though you’re probably not aware of your full comic potential. I say that because I am the great Lance Thruster and thrust my lance whenever even a tree holds still.

    You’re like a prop comic but without the props or the comedy. Did I really just right that? Oh well, never mind. The codeine kicked in when I wasn’t looking.

    Posted by: LanceThruster at January 4, 2007 4:22 PM”

    —-

    It is typical of Vanderleun not to know the dif between “right” and “write, although being aware of all internet traditions as he is, he would know that spell flames are only appropriate in certain circumstances (as when someone is braying about how smart they are – S-M-R-T, I mean S-M-A-R-T).

    Hopefully now you can all see that Vanderleun is worse than Hitler (see internet tradition “Godwin’s law” ) and will judge him accordingly as per the Pirate Code. (though technically, they’re more a set of guidelines).

    And, yes, I have been convinced by others here, that should master Vanderleun die by his own hand, he should not be missed, and not even “the Russert Rule”, requiring a period however short, of respectful mourning, shall be invoked.

    What say ye?

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  4. Playing Catch-Up

    Okay, back from DC and a long weekend trip away. Rested and ready, as it were. Here are a few items piled up in the old Intertube drift net. More serious stuff coming. • My Old Workplace: Stephen Colbert discusses…

  13. […] Have you ever heard of a LOL cat?  Rickrolling? All Your (insert word) Are Belong To Us? Goatse (I’m not going to link that one, it’s really disgusting)? The Star Wars Kid ?  Chocolate Rain?  Little Superstar? Numa Numa? The Flying Spaghetti Monster ? YTMND? Demotivators? You haven’t? O RLY? Then you really haven’t seen the web in all its glory. Web phenomena like these are called Internet Memes, and become a pervasive part of heavy Internet users’ lingo and thinking. It’s hard to track just how a meme originates sometimes, but they often come from discussion board threads or people just naiively expressing themselves. In any case, I think I just witnessed one being born. On a fairly obscure discussion thread the other day, this dialog occurred. Within 24 hours, we already we have these interpretations, quickly repurposing other memes. Before you know it, someone will create a t-shirt on Cafe Press, and: voila! An Internet Meme is born. A piece of advice if you ever find yourself in the midst of a meme-birth: Trademark it! Don’t be like Harvey R. Ball, creator of the Smiley Face Icon, who only collected his original $45 fee… […]

  18. […] 18, 2008 Make Every Day Internet Traditions Awareness Week Posted by The Editors under Uncategorized   You may think you are aware of all internettraditions. O RLY? Following on the success of Islamo-Fascism Awareness Week, The Traditional Internet Preservation Society invites you to celebrate Internet Traditions Awareness Week, and help preserve our valuable internet traditions. […]