Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

It’s easy to sit in safety and prescribe what other people should be doing.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

They punch you in the face and then start crying because their fist hurts.

Trump should be leading, not lying.

Speaker Mike Johnson is a vile traitor to the House and the Constitution.

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

Republicans firmly believe having an abortion is a very personal, very private decision between a woman and J.D. Vance.

We know you aren’t a Democrat but since you seem confused let me help you.

Prediction: the gop will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

This really is a full service blog.

Republicans cannot even be trusted with their own money.

Baby steps, because the Republican Party is full of angry babies.

America is going up in flames. The NYTimes fawns over MAGA celebrities. No longer a real newspaper.

Shut up, hissy kitty!

You cannot shame the shameless.

The real work of an opposition party is to hold the people in power accountable.

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

Museums are not America’s attic for its racist shit.

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

People are weird.

’Where will you hide, Roberts, the laws all being flat?’

… gradually, and then suddenly.

Since we are repeating ourselves, let me just say fuck that.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

You are here: Home / Humorous / Interesting Name Choice

Interesting Name Choice

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This is mildly amusing:

Sen. Evan Bayh’s staff softball team, The Bayh Partisans, has cancelled the game it had scheduled for tomorrow evening with the drug policy team The One Hitters. Bayh staffer Jonathan Stahler sent One Hitter team captain Kris Krane an e-mail Monday morning citing “[t]oo many people out of town” as the reason for the cancellation.

I can’t be the only one who recognizes that the term “one-hitter” has meaning outside of baseball.

Reader Interactions

53Comments

  2. 2.

    Third Eye Open

    BTW…if they bitch out on a game, do their opponents call em the One Hitters Quiters?

    …I hate myself for typing that

  4. 4.

    Breschau

    I can’t be the only one who recognizes that the term “one-hitter” has meaning outside of baseball.

    No, you’re not, you DFH. But honestly, I’d never heard it called a dugout before.

  5. 5.

    Tom

    I actually had a one hitter for the first time in years this weekend. Thankfully, there wasn’t much in it.

  6. 6.

    SamFromUtah

    I’d never heard it called a dugout before.

    Heh, I had heard of that, and also a variant of one-hitters called a “bat”.

  7. 7.

    Tom

    But honestly, I’d never heard it called a dugout before.

    I was always under the assumption that the dugout was box that held the (infield) grass.

  11. 11.

    Blurm

    Dugouts are the best. Mine has got to be at least 15 years old now. The one hitters last for a year or so and then you need to replace it. Once in college a friend was arrested and when he was searched, the officer found the dugout and had no idea what it was. He jumped when my friend slid the lid and the bat popped out. teeheehee. good thing they didn’t find the 3 hits of acid he had…

  12. 12.

    gypsy howell

    Ugh. Please FSM, don’t let Bayh be Obama’s veep choice. ‘Partisan’ he ain’t.
    His team should be called the ‘Go Along to Get Alongs.’

  15. 15.

    cleek

    Heh, I had heard of that, and also a variant of one-hitters called a “bat”.

    little brass bats that get supa-hot supa-fast. yeah. good times.

  16. 16.

    John S.

    In terms of one hitters, I’m +12.

    I’ve been wondering this ever since John started using the shorthand for his alcohol tally. Does it really work the same for the heads?

    I mean, I don’t really keep track of the hits and nevermind the fact that all hits are not created equal…ah fuck it — John +8.

  17. 17.

    John Cole

    SO what is the decision here? Are they just blissfully ignorant or making an intentional joke calling their drug policy team the one-hitters?

  19. 19.

    Steve

    If it’s a joke it’s a pretty good one, which makes me seriously doubt that anyone in our government came up with it.

    One vote for blissful ignorance.

  20. 20.

    Breschau

    I vote intentional joke. You have to imagine a team made up of narcs would know every single drug slang word in existence.

    What I really want to know is: do any of them get high after the game?

  22. 22.

    Bill H

    Apparently Andrea Mitchell being critical of John McCain was a one-hitter. On Hardball tonight she is saying that he is a decent, honorable sweet and kindly man who would not say shit if he had a mouthful. She says all this negative and dishonest campaign stuff is him being “misled by his campaign staff.”

    This comment will probably send John Cole over the edge, but I just report.

  23. 23.

    Keith

    Heh, I had heard of that, and also a variant of one-hitters called a “bat”.

    Those are good for 2 1/2 regular hits :) Only true one-hitter pipe I’ve actually seen is those ceramic “cigarettes” that take a tiny little plug at the end. I usually hear the term “one-hitter” in response to some the strain being smoked rather than the apparatus (i.e. the aforementioned “one-hitter quitter”)

  24. 24.

    Breschau

    after?

    you’re doing it wrong.

    LOL. Well, okay – your choice. But I haven’t gotten high since I turned 21. I figured, why put myself into an altered state using something I can be arrested for possessing, when I can pick up alcohol just about anywhere, and enjoy it in the privacy of my home with no hassle. Or, ya know, take a cab.

    That, and the fact that alcohol makes me much more outgoing, while getting high causes me to not speak for 6 hours. That didn’t do much for my social life back in college.

  25. 25.

    The Moar You Know

    What I really want to know is: do any of them get high after the game?

    Cops get high more often than any other folks I’ve met.

  26. 26.

    SamFromUtah

    I usually hear the term “one-hitter” in response to some the strain being smoked…

    Where I learned my pot slang, we called that “one-hit wonder”, as I recall. That was a loooong time ago. Cf. George Carlin’s “One-poke shit”.

  28. 28.

    phobos

    A spokesman for the drug policy team dismissed the allegations, saying “Uhhh…what?”

  29. 29.

    Incertus

    Where I learned my pot slang, we called that “one-hit wonder”, as I recall

    Are you talking about a one-hitter quitter? Heh.

  32. 32.

    Cruel Jest

    Gotta be intentional. One Hitter barely scrapes against a baseball term. I give them credit for the irony. Unfortunately, this is the most effective action they’ve taken in decades.

  33. 33.

    SamFromUtah

    Are you talking about a one-hitter quitter? Heh.

    Not quite – our definition of the Good Stuff was that you forget to take the second hit. :)

  34. 34.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    Incertus thanks very much, you have now sent me on a Mike Oldfield Youtube quest that will probably keep me up until 3am after I have done TB1,2,3, Millenium Bell, Far Above the Clouds and heaven knows what else. My boss thanks you for my ineptitude in the morning.

  35. 35.

    Jim

    “Mentioning drugs is racist.”

    Yeah, well. So is saying that mentioning drugs is racist. we could continue in this fashion, but I might have to drink more and then you’d be sorry.

  36. 36.

    Gus

    John +8.

    +8? +12? Maybe I’m jsut getting old, but man I’m a cheap date on the rare occasion I indulge. If I take more than two I get comatose.

  37. 37.

    hamletta

    Ha!

    I learned “one-hitter” here in TN, but a friend who’d spent some time at Southern IL U introduced me to the term “dugout.”

    Perhaps the linguists who do the soda/pop/coke maps should add this to their questionnaires.

  38. 38.

    SamFromUtah

    Perhaps the linguists who do the soda/pop/coke maps should add this to their questionnaires.

    Tetrahydrocannabinolinguistics is a sadly underfunded discipline.

  39. 39.

    Conservatively Liberal

    In terms of one hitters, I’m +12.

    I lose count after breakfast, but I would guess +40. But it is for legit medical reasons, really. No shit, really. I got my papers so I can use my papers.:)

    little brass bats that get supa-hot supa-fast. yeah. good times.

    I had an anodized (blue) aluminum ‘bat’, but I chrome plated it to show my boss (electroplating/bumper & chrome repair) that yes indeed, he could easily chrome aluminum with his setup.

    I may still have it somewhere around the house.

  41. 41.

    Kallisti

    Chiggins is right. My partner plays in the same league as the NORML One Hitters, and this isn’t the first time that they’ve had upstanding teams forfit games to them.

  44. 44.

    Mary

    OMG, grade 8 flashbacks from that ad, Incertus. (Not that I was doing anything causing flashbacks in grade 8, of course).

    The one extra thing that ad needed was a shot of McCain as the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, with his jaunty little sailor cap. Schmoo, Marshmallow Man — that’s McCain!

  47. 47.

    4tehlulz

    The NSA is listening . . . listening . . . (beep)

    Hey, they need to score too, you know.

  49. 49.

    crack

    It’s a joke, but maybe the whole team isn’t in on it. It fits with the softball team naming conventions. Scared Hitless is in our league.

  50. 50.

    Bey

    I learned “one-hitter” here in TN, but a friend who’d spent some time at Southern IL U introduced me to the term “dugout.”

    My home town! SIU! Go Dawgs!

    Deliberate, no question about it. And funny as hell, I might add.

  51. 51.

    feral1

    Ultimate teams tend to be less subtle. My favorite name for a club team so far is- We Smoke Pot.

  52. 52.

    w vincentz

    My team is called the “tokers”. I’ll tell you all about them. At first base is a guy named….?
    OK, at second base is a guy.
    Shortstop, yeah we got one.
    Pitcher, yup.
    Catcher? Who cares.
    Outfield…we all are.

    What was I typing about?
    Oh, nevermind. Pass it mfer!

Comments are closed.

Trackbacks

  1. […] Via B.J.: Sen. Evan Bayh’s [pronounced “Bye’s”] staff softball team, The Bayh Partisans, has cancelled the game it had scheduled for tomorrow evening with the drug policy team The One Hitters. Bayh staffer Jonathan Stahler sent One Hitter team captain Kris Krane an e-mail Monday morning citing “[t]oo many people out of town” as the reason for the cancellation. […]