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Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

Good lord, these people are nuts.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.

You cannot shame the shameless.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

T R E 4 5 O N

A lot of Dems talk about what the media tells them to talk about. Not helpful.

This really is a full service blog.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

No offense, but this thread hasn’t been about you for quite a while.

Second rate reporter says what?

The party of Reagan has become the party of Putin.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

Technically true, but collectively nonsense

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

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You are here: Home / Who’s To Blame For the Wall Street Mess?

Who’s To Blame For the Wall Street Mess?

by Michael D.|  October 2, 20087:43 am| 88 Comments

This post is in: General Stupidity

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As you know, I’ve been trying to wrap my head around it, and I just can’t. Fortunately, the fundamentalists have the answer. It’s the GHEYS!!

Christian fundamentalists are suggesting gays and lesbians are to blame for Wall Street’s woes, a frequently made charge in the wake of national calamities.

In a September 25th blog post titled ‘The Nation Will Right Itself If It Fixes Sex’, Christian Civil League of Maine Executive Director Michael Heath writes that the financial crisis facing Wall Street is a symptom of America’s sinful sexual culture, including the acceptance of gay unions.

I’m just glad we now know.

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88Comments

  1. 1.

    Wilson Heath

    October 2, 2008 at 7:48 am

    That’s just as logical and reasoned as any other view that Christian fundamentalists hold. I’d love to here some detail of just how this acceptance of gays is connected to decades of Republican deregulation, though. Is Phil Gramm gay?

  2. 2.

    Charity

    October 2, 2008 at 7:50 am

    ….

    I got nothin’.

  3. 3.

    Charity

    October 2, 2008 at 7:51 am

    Oh, I will add though that today is my 3rd wedding anniversary, and my marriage does not seem to have been affected by OMG THE GHEYS! getting married.

    Happy anniversary, sweetie!

  4. 4.

    Charity

    October 2, 2008 at 7:52 am

    @Wilson Heath: No, but he is married to someone who was a muckity-muck at Enron. Which just proves how qualified he is to be head of Treasury.

  5. 5.

    Original Lee

    October 2, 2008 at 7:53 am

    I now miss Lou Rukeyser even more than before, although that is hardly possible. Can’t you just see him skewering all this nonsense in his trademark gentle punny snark?

  6. 6.

    Walker

    October 2, 2008 at 7:55 am

    Well, in my experience, it is true that gay couples have been a major force behind gentrification. They have a lot of disposable income and it is common for them to use this income to fix up houses in less than desirable areas. My mother lives in an old district that was run down, experienced a major gay influx, and then became the “it” place to live.

    But when they fix up these houses, they pay rock-bottom prices, because they are taking the risk the area is not going to get better. They are not the fools paying top dollar for a house in an established area, installing a granite counter and doubling the price.

  7. 7.

    apocalipstick

    October 2, 2008 at 7:56 am

    Or maybe it’s America’s acceptance of a sinful financial culture. Nothing in the Bible endorses capitalism, although there are a few verses about lending at interest. Hint: it’s frowned upon.

  8. 8.

    the Reverend boy

    October 2, 2008 at 7:57 am

    Happy to know that once again that I and all my gay and lesbian brothers and sisters are the root of all evil in this country, and not the love of money.

    I remain further convinced that fundamentalists do not know the Bible at all.

    LOVE the new look on the site by the way :-)

  9. 9.

    Conservatively Liberal

    October 2, 2008 at 7:58 am

    So it is all Larry Craig’s fault? Makes sense to me.

    Cole, fix yer blog! Once the comments get somewhere over 160, the bottom of the page turns black and I can’t post anymore.

    That’s not change I can believe in! :)

  10. 10.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 7:58 am

    Holy Jeebus! I should have known! It’s been right there in front of my nose!

    Thank Zoron for the Christian Fundies, or I wouldn’t know WHAT to think!

  11. 11.

    Glenn

    October 2, 2008 at 7:59 am

    Weren’t they also responsible for 9/11?

  12. 12.

    rachel

    October 2, 2008 at 8:00 am

    Wouldn’t it be a kick in the head if we got to the afterlife and discover that God didn’t give a shit about teh gheys; he was all bent out of shape about people wearing poly-cotton blends.

    Deuteronomy 22:11 Thou shalt not wear a garment of divers sorts, as of woolen and linen together.

    At least wool and linen are both natural. Polyester is an abomination, IMO.

  13. 13.

    Nerf

    October 2, 2008 at 8:02 am

    I just let my co-worker next to me know that, as a lesbian, this is all her fault. I hoope she feels sufficient shame for her deviancxe causing worldwide financial meltdown…

  14. 14.

    DrDave

    October 2, 2008 at 8:04 am

    It’s the GHEYS!!

    No. It’s Bill Clinton’s fault because he got a blow job and then lied about it.

  15. 15.

    Punchy

    October 2, 2008 at 8:07 am

    I just wish someone could explain just what the fuck the “Log Cabin” Republicans are all about. How the fuck they claim to support the party that villifies, excoriates, shuns, and openly tries to exclude them is hilarious. Perhaps the “BOHICA” Republicans is better?

  16. 16.

    El Cid

    October 2, 2008 at 8:19 am

    You mean, with as much right wing conspiracy paranoia as we’ve seen throughout history about THE JOOOZ, they can’t use a Jewish banker conspiracy to explain Wall Street banks???

    What good then is a Jewish banker conspiracy theory if you can’t use it NOW?

  17. 17.

    Snail

    October 2, 2008 at 8:20 am

    I like most of the site improvements, but me no likey the upside-down thread chronology. Top to bottom!

  18. 18.

    Snail

    October 2, 2008 at 8:21 am

    That’s strange. I just submitted my comment and it appeared. On the bottom! ???

  19. 19.

    p.a.

    October 2, 2008 at 8:23 am

    Topic for discussion: are we at the point, or already past the point, where the stupid and the insanity is so overwhelming that satire and parody are no longer possible? Is this the death-knell for The Onion.

  20. 20.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 8:24 am

    “Topic for discussion: are we at the point, or already past the point, where the stupid and the insanity is so overwhelming that satire and parody are no longer possible? Is this the death-knell for The Onion.”

    Well, seeing how much more angry Jon Stewart has been in the last few weeks, you may have something there.

  21. 21.

    Comrade Incertus

    October 2, 2008 at 8:25 am

    Man, y’all are evil. You cause hurricanes, economic depressions–what’s next? Locusts?

  22. 22.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 8:26 am

    Where are my friggin’ tag buttons??

  23. 23.

    Adrienne

    October 2, 2008 at 8:28 am

    You know how it is… Religious fundamentalists blame teh gays and regular ol’ Repubs blame teh negroes – anything to distract from the fact that it’s mostly their fault and their policies and their Scapegoating the most oppressed among us is a time honored tradition. It’s like Thanksgiving. No need to break with tradition now.

    9/11 = Teh gays and teh secularists who love them
    Katrina = teh negroes and teh gays…. especially the gay negroes (oh noes!)
    Housing Crisis = teh negroes
    Financial ruin = teh gays.

    See. I told ya. Time honored tradition.

  24. 24.

    r€nato

    October 2, 2008 at 8:29 am

    So it’s the fault of all those closeted gay Republicans, hmmm???

  25. 25.

    Adrienne

    October 2, 2008 at 8:29 am

    Sorry….it should say “and their ideology”. My bad.

  26. 26.

    Punchy

    October 2, 2008 at 8:29 am

    You have to

    manually enter in the codes

    No buttons fo you!

  27. 27.

    MattF

    October 2, 2008 at 8:31 am

    I give up. What category goes beyond ‘General Stupidity?’ ‘President Stupidity’? ‘Emperor Stupidity’? ‘Avatar of the Universal Spirit Stupidity?’

  28. 28.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 8:32 am

    No buttons fo you!

    Noooooooooo!!! I needs mah buttons!

  29. 29.

    r€nato

    October 2, 2008 at 8:32 am

    A Republican’s Weekly To-Do List

    Monday-Blame the gays
    Tuesday-Blame the feminazis
    Wednesday-Blame the black folks
    Thursday-Blame the illegals
    Friday-Blame Clinton
    Saturday-Blame the permissive culture
    Sunday-Blame abortion and evolution

  30. 30.

    Bob In Pacifica

    October 2, 2008 at 8:33 am

    The example set by the gays, all that fornicatin’, made the bankers feel the need to screw everyone, regardless of gender.

    That’s as close as I can get.

    Where are all the buttons along the top? Did the gays take them?

  31. 31.

    Barbara

    October 2, 2008 at 8:35 am

    Everytime I think that there is nothing more vicious or more stupid or more illogical that the current cast of Republicans and their fans can do, I am proved wrong. Whether it’s suppressing the vote or blaming dark people or poor people or gay people, I am just continually amazed that I can still be amazed at how low it goes.

  32. 32.

    Zifnab

    October 2, 2008 at 8:35 am

    Larry Craig’s bathroom tap dance was the footstep of doom for our nation’s economic stability. Who knew?

    Honestly, though, who the fuck cares what hillbilly tent preachers think about the economic climate. If the economy was humming along smoothly, would they be celebrating the glorious contribution that guy-on-guy buttsex has made to our financial stability? Are they more likely to become pro-choice if we don’t get hit by any hurricanes next year? Will they back off the Islamo-bashing if we get another round of “victory” in Iraq? Of course not.

    No serious person takes this shit literally anymore. This isn’t “The economy tanked because gays are wrecking our society.” It’s “The economy is in the tank and, oh, by the way, gays are wrecking our society.” Causation went out the window generations ago with these people.

  33. 33.

    ksmiami

    October 2, 2008 at 8:36 am

    Hey John Cole, speaking as a former Republican myself, aren’t you glad you got off that train?

  34. 34.

    cyntax

    October 2, 2008 at 8:36 am

    At least wool and linen are both natural. Polyester is an abomination, IMO.

    I find poly blends are indispensible for things like cycling and rockclimbing (though smart wool is teh awesome). But love that quote from Deuteronomy; the Bible is really full of some whacky stuff and people definitely pick and choose what they think is important (even if they say they don’t).

  35. 35.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 8:37 am

    Where are all the buttons along the top? Did the gays take them?

    I bet they did, you know them gays is always accessorizin’!

    /toothlesscuss

  36. 36.

    Dreggas

    October 2, 2008 at 8:45 am

    Damn it they left out all us pagans. I’m half-gay can I take some
    credit?

  37. 37.

    Comrade Incertus

    October 2, 2008 at 8:46 am

    No serious person takes this shit literally anymore.

    That’s true, but there are some awfully unserious
    people in positions of great authority in this country, which is a
    shame.

  38. 38.

    Comrade Incertus

    October 2, 2008 at 8:46 am

    Fucking blockquotes.

  39. 39.

    Tsulagi

    October 2, 2008 at 8:48 am

    Figures. You gotta stop choosing that shit. Do it for Jesus, and
    Wall Street.

    Perhaps the “BOHICA” Republicans is better?

    Actually, that fits pretty well.

  40. 40.

    Doug H. (Fausto no more)

    October 2, 2008 at 8:49 am

    Had to flush the cache, but I finally got the new layout to work.
    Very swank, my complements to the designers. Also, everything past
    post 150 in the other thread is blocked by a huge wall of black so
    I couldn’t post this there: Balloon Juice 3.0 is still supported by
    Bananas In Pajamas Media 3.0? Really? Are Soros’s checks still
    bouncing?

  41. 41.

    Tsulagi

    October 2, 2008 at 8:52 am

    What the hell? My “Perhaps the “BOHICA” Republicans is better?”
    above showed in Preview to be in blockquote. Must be teh gheys
    fault again.

  42. 42.

    Dennis - SGMM

    October 2, 2008 at 8:55 am

    The gays seem to feel that the Wall Street mess is the fault of the
    same political party that plays the Lucy/football trick on the
    fundies in every election. On another note: we celebrated our
    thirtieth wedding anniversary this year. Although our marriage
    seems sound my wife has lately shown a lot of interest in the films
    of Jodie Foster. Should I be concerned?

  43. 43.

    Scrutinizer

    October 2, 2008 at 8:56 am

    Deuteronomy 22:11 Thou shalt not wear a garment of divers sorts,
    as of woolen and linen together.

    You mean like wet suits?

  44. 44.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 8:56 am

    I am nothing without my tag buttons. le sigh.

  45. 45.

    jrg

    October 2, 2008 at 8:57 am

    “It’s the GHEYS!!” Absolutely. I’d like to add the fact that
    Michael Heath has not yet been awarded the Nobel prize in Economics
    is an indicator of liberal bias in Academia.

  46. 46.

    Svensker

    October 2, 2008 at 8:57 am

    The Negroes stole our buttons!

  47. 47.

    Scrutinizer

    October 2, 2008 at 8:57 am

    So, block quotes hosed? And why can’t I wear garments that divers
    wear? As long as I don’t wear two of them. With dildoes.

  48. 48.

    Montysano (All Hail Marx & Lennon)

    October 2, 2008 at 8:58 am

    “The gays did it” is so over, so yesterday. Gwen Fucking Ifill, my
    friends. She wrote a book. A BOOK!

  49. 49.

    comrade scott

    October 2, 2008 at 8:59 am

    Gay Republicans is as oxymoronic as Black Republicans. Each must
    have a large dose of self-loathing if they politically identify
    themselves with that party.

  50. 50.

    Jay C

    October 2, 2008 at 9:05 am

    “You mean, with as much right wing conspiracy paranoia as we’ve
    seen throughout history about THE JOOOZ, they can’t use a Jewish
    banker conspiracy to explain Wall Street banks???
    Well, it’s
    early days, yet: the VRWC probably has a few of its deeper thinkers
    working on it: probably trying to gin up a suitable euphemism:
    “internationalist” and “rootless cosmopolitan” having gotten too
    old-fashioned. Most likely they’ll come up with something with
    “global” in it, to tar two groups at once.

  51. 51.

    Brian J

    October 2, 2008 at 9:09 am

    Is there some sort of triple threat out there, like a black Jew who
    also happens to be gay? What if they read, gasp, The New York Times
    and vote for the Democrats? What if they drive a Prius?

  52. 52.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 9:10 am

    McCAIN: I think it’s very possible that both of those teams —
    both the Dodgers and the Red Sox — could surprise everyone.
      JOE SCARBOROUGH: Boy, well those are two class
    organizations —   McCAIN: — but that shows you why I’m not
    a rich man. [laughs]

    Riiiiiggggghttttt…..

  53. 53.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 9:11 am

    Gaaaahhh!! Damn the code on this site. Damn it all to HECK!

  54. 54.

    Montysano (All Hail Marx & Lennon)

    October 2, 2008 at 9:14 am

    testing blockquote

    testing em tag testing link

  55. 55.

    Scrutinizer

    October 2, 2008 at 9:14 am

    OT: Still the adult magazine black screen of death using FF 2 &
    3 on 100+ post threads. Different computer now, same behavior.
    Dreggas @ 36: Is half-gay like bi? Or is it like being in a closet
    with Dutch doors? And if the latter, which door is open? It would
    be irresponsible not to speculate,

  56. 56.

    4tehlulz

    October 2, 2008 at 9:14 am

    The gays even stole the best antisemitic canard; they really are a
    devious (and stylish) lot.

  57. 57.

    Montysano (All Hail Marx & Lennon)

    October 2, 2008 at 9:14 am

    Fail

  58. 58.

    Scrutinizer

    October 2, 2008 at 9:16 am

    Do I have to use &lt br &gt now to break lines, so that I
    can have a blank line like this? And will Preview lie to me yet
    again?

  59. 59.

    Scrutinizer

    October 2, 2008 at 9:17 am

    Yes. Preview lies like a Republican.

  60. 60.

    Comrade Grand Panjandrum

    October 2, 2008 at 9:20 am

    Well it could NOT have been us nice “normal” folks now, could it?
    BTW Michael since all “you people” seem to have caused so many ills
    what the hell are you going to do about all this global warming
    stuff you caused?

  61. 61.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    October 2, 2008 at 9:22 am

    Excuse me, this is all testing, given that I missed all the fun
    last night and now see that the buttons are gone. Who knows what
    hacks still work? <img
    src=”http://static.flickr.com/29/57621369_1f33b64ebb.jpg” />

    one   two   three

    <object width=”425″ height=”344″><param
    name=”movie”
    value=”http://www.youtube.com/v/YjI-cyfQhdk&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en&fs=1″></param><param
    name=”allowFullScreen” value=”true”></param><embed
    src=”http://www.youtube.com/v/YjI-cyfQhdk&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en&fs=1″
    type=”application/x-shockwave-flash” allowfullscreen=”true”
    width=”425″ height=”344″></embed></object> Once I
    know what works, I’m making a template file in Notepad so I can
    just copy and paste as needed. I make too many silly typos on my
    own.

  62. 62.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    October 2, 2008 at 9:23 am

    Right. I am miffed now. Do you hear me? MIFFED.

  63. 63.

    b. hussein canuckistani

    October 2, 2008 at 9:25 am

    A couple of old, old friends of mine came out a few years back, and
    we’re still friends. Can I have some credit for the financial
    meltdown too? I’m not actually gay, but I’d like to be on the
    fundie blacklist.

  64. 64.

    gbear

    October 2, 2008 at 9:26 am

    I can tell you without reservation that the financial crisis has
    become a huge part of my own homosexual adgenda. My ‘disposable
    income’ has pretty much shrunk to the point where it pays for the
    cat’s food.

  65. 65.

    TheFountainHead

    October 2, 2008 at 9:27 am

    MY BUTTONS! THEY ARE BACK! REJOICE!

  66. 66.

    Zifnab

    October 2, 2008 at 9:35 am

    No serious person takes this shit literally anymore.

    That’s true, but there are some awfully unserious people in
    positions of great authority in this country, which is a shame.

    The people at the highest reaches of authority know
    the game. They run these plays for DOMA and against Laurence v.
    Texas
    in the most cynical methods possible. The only time
    sitting Republicans seem to give two shits about any of these hot
    button issues is during an election year. Outside of the four
    months before November on even calendar years, the hang-wringing
    pants-wetting homophobic hypochondria never gets more than token
    attention. Have you noticed how politicians rarely run anti-gay
    ballot initiatives on off-year elections? Almost as though they’re
    saving such legislation as a draw to bring bible-thumping fundies
    to the polls to vote Republican? I mean, for Christ’s sake, look at
    how many Christian Fundie Anti-Gay activists come out of the
    woodwork as closet cases. No one takes this shit seriously at the
    higher escalons of power. Edit: BLOCKQUOTES! YOU HAVE FAILED ME
    AGAIN! DAMN YOU! Also, carriage returns.

  67. 67.

    4tehlulz

    October 2, 2008 at 9:39 am

    a suitable euphemism:

    You’re slow. That euphemism is “George Soros.”

  68. 68.

    Comrade Sock Puppet of the Great Satan

    October 2, 2008 at 9:40 am

    It’s just like the Underpants Gnomes in reverse: 1: Ghey Sex 2:
    ???!!??? 3. Losses!

  69. 69.

    Comrade Dread

    October 2, 2008 at 9:45 am

    You know, I posted in jest on Kos yesterday that I blamed teh gay
    marriage for Wall Street. I guess satire is dead.

  70. 70.

    CIRCVS MAXIMVS MMVIII

    October 2, 2008 at 9:47 am

    Well, if the fundies want to interject religion into this whole
    thing, then I guess they would like to tell me why having a larger
    than life sized golden bull in the middle of Wall Street might not
    be the reason? Hmmmm!

  71. 71.

    CIRCVS MAXIMVS MMVIII

    October 2, 2008 at 9:48 am

    Click to edit? We have editable posts now? TZ will be so amazed. ;)

  72. 72.

    Comrade Darkness

    October 2, 2008 at 9:50 am

    “I remain further convinced that fundamentalists do not know the
    Bible at all.” Oh, as an atheist, this is the single best way to
    get a fundie to leave you alone, fully voluntarily. Quote the bible
    and theology at them. Better yet, argue provenance.

  73. 73.

    CIRCVS MAXIMVS MMVIII

    October 2, 2008 at 10:00 am

    btw John or Michael, or Annette or someone in charge, not sure if
    you are aware of it, the first post in the new design from last
    night (with the home crap home book) has a HUGE black span at the
    bottom of the page that is blocking the posting fields. Are you
    aware of this? I’m posting about it here because I can’t post about
    it there. Thanks!

  74. 74.

    CIRCVS MAXIMVS MMVIII

    October 2, 2008 at 10:01 am

    “I remain further convinced that fundamentalists do not know the
    Bible at all.” Oh, as an atheist, this is the single best way to
    get a fundie to leave you alone, fully voluntarily. Quote the
    bible and theology at them. Better yet, argue provenance.

    … (the above should be in blockquotes) … It has
    been my experience that atheists ALWAYS know the Bible better than
    so called believers.

  75. 75.

    CIRCVS MAXIMVS MMVIII

    October 2, 2008 at 10:04 am

    Oh phuk it!

  76. 76.

    nicethugbert

    October 2, 2008 at 10:19 am

    You heathen scumbags! You’re all wrong! This is the one and only
    time the fundies have ever been CORRECT! If “Wall Street” would
    practice Abstinance Only then they would stop fucking the Little
    Guy! Damn homos!

  77. 77.

    charlotte

    October 2, 2008 at 10:21 am

    I’m so relieved. I was worried maybe I was responsible for the
    credit crisis. I was super bitchy to my husband two weeks ago at
    dinner as the result of one glass too many of red wine and not
    enough to eat. I kind of ruined our evening–and maybe the economy
    too. Thank goodness all this mess I barely understand is the fault
    of all those disgusting gay people. They seem to think that Sarah’s
    “right to privacy” should be extended to them too and also, such
    as, however, as they seek to embrace foundationally whatever
    because we need to shore up job creation and life. I mean, come on,
    six-pack: Stand up! At a minimum, rear up? Catch ya later.

  78. 78.

    SGEW

    October 2, 2008 at 10:26 am

    [This should be in blockquotes. Why is it not in blockquotes?!]: It
    has been my experience that atheists ALWAYS know the Bible better
    than so called believers. [End blockquotes.] Especially when we
    start quotin’ Leviticus. Such fun!

    “These you shall regard as detestable . . . they are an
    abomination: . . . the ostrich, the seagull, the little owl, the
    cormorant, the great owl, the desert owl . . . .”

    – Leviticus 11:13 – 18 Owls are unclean.
    Unclean!! They’re as much an abomination as teh gheys!! Obviously
    the financial crisis is the fault of owls and cormorants. GAY owls
    and cormorants! Also:

    smart wool is teh awesome

    Amen.

  79. 79.

    SGEW

    October 2, 2008 at 10:32 am

    Noooes! My beloved blockquotes are all fakakta! . . . This is the
    fault of all those gay, jewish, black seagulls, I bet.

  80. 80.

    SGEW

    October 2, 2008 at 10:35 am

    And my formatting is all screwy too . . . I guess it’ll take a
    while for me to get up to speed w/ th’ new setup. . . . . (this
    should be a line break) . . . . My words somehow feel less cogent
    when they’re all bunched together in a big old bolus of a
    paragraph.

  81. 81.

    CIRCVS MAXIMVS MMVIII

    October 2, 2008 at 10:42 am

    It wasn’t you SGEW, it was the ghosts of the Levite priests. ;)

  82. 82.

    ppcli

    October 2, 2008 at 10:48 am

    Hey Charity at #3 – congratulations! It was my anniversary
    yesterday too. My 19th. I still can’t figure out how my wife and I
    have managed to stay in love this long even though my native
    country allows gay marriage. I guess it’s a good thing I now live
    in a state where “marriage is defended”. Otherwise we would have
    been divorced years ago.

  83. 83.

    rob!

    October 2, 2008 at 10:52 am

    jeez, i knew teh gays were to blame for Hollywood, but now they’re
    responsible for WALL STREET too? what’s next, musical theater?

  84. 84.

    Chris Johnson

    October 2, 2008 at 11:21 am

    Goddammit, Michael. It’s like “I read these morons so you don’t
    have to”, except that guess what? You don’t have to either! And you
    certainly don’t have to come tell me all about this pointless
    internet blog dickwad. Get back to me when you see that headline on
    ANY newspaper or respectable website and then I’ll cry oh noes.
    Sheesh.

  85. 85.

    Beej

    October 2, 2008 at 11:42 am

    Oh. My. God. Yes, I know. The fundies are always just this side of
    totally nuts, but this one takes it over the edge. Wait for the
    Rapture, brother. When it comes, all our prophecies will be
    fulfilled, and we won’t have to deal with nasty things like, for
    instance, reality, anymore. We can float forever on our clouds,
    listening to harp music.

  86. 86.

    SGEW

    October 2, 2008 at 11:51 am

    @Chris Johnson: Mocking these people
    gives us the jollies. Easy prey, I admit, but it’s an admirable
    pursuit.

  87. 87.

    Bootlegger

    October 2, 2008 at 1:12 pm

    Well if the xtian god keeps doing nasty shit to us we need to find a weapon that can take it down. I mean what are they doing worshipping a creature that would torture everyone?

    On South Park they nuked our imaginations, can’t we slam a giant anal dildo up god’s ass! That’ll fix it.

  88. 88.

    Sister Machine Gun of Mild Harmony

    October 2, 2008 at 2:27 pm

    Oh no! Not again! How do the Xtians keep finding out about our nefarious gay agenda items? I mean everytime we do something big (9/11, Katrina, financial meltdown) in an effort to weaken the world so that we can take over, some Xtian blows our cover. Ted Haggard, is that you?

    PS. We have your buttons…. wire large sums of money into an account in Ibiza and you might see them again.

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