Via Steve Benen, read James Joyner complain that the right ran out of current ideas some time around Iran/Contra.
Part of the reason I’m drawn to the center-left blogs, including those cited above, Kevin Drum, Steve Benen, and others despite disagreeing with them while finding it increasingly difficult to find center-right blogs worth my time is that the former are much more likely to get beyond the debates of the 1980 election. There’s almost no serious analysis of health care reform, urban planning, education, and many other issues that regularly crop up on the best lefty blogs on their conservative counterparts. If we read about those issues at all, they’re framed as if Ronald Reagan were still aspiring to high office: Say No to socialism! Abolish the Department of Education! Government IS the problem!
While traditionalist grand theory is still valuable and worth discussion, it doesn’t work as a blanket response to micro-level issues. And defining conservatism solely by “What would Reagan do?” is a political non-starter in a world that simply looks much different than in did twenty-eight years ago. It would be as if Reagan constantly droned on about the evils of Harry Truman. Time marches on. Debates must, too, in order to be interesting.
…then, via Clif at Sadly, No!, read Jules Crittenden Andrew Breitbart (my mistake) unintentionally concede Joyner’s point.
With the economy in the pits, the young, the restless and unapologetically handsome should use their looks, vigor and Internet knowledge to wrest away elective office from joyless bureaucrats who gallingly repackaged the soiled utopian promises of their overly replayed Woodstock days as “hope” and “change.”
[…] The suburban Mall Rats will be the first Obamacons to come back to the fold when they realize that trickle-up socialism limits their lifestyle options. So let’s stop first at Abercrombie and Fitch. See those shirtless models in the storefront tossing footballs in the air?
There’s a better use of their time and efforts. Tanned, coiffed and seriously cut, these young studs could be tossing free-trade legislation across the halls of the Cannon House Office Building faster than you can Twitter “The Bella Twins.”
[…] Sure, a lot of our newly elected officials may not be completely up to speed on the issues, but once elected, they’ll have close to three months to cram. That’s almost a full semester – enough time to get the gist of the Constitution. Leave the details for the staffers.
Got that? James Joyner worries that Republican ideas can be exhaustively covered in a pamphlet. Mistaking that weakness for a strength, Breitbart imagines contesting the next election with an unstoppable army of Sarah Palins.
Between Joyner and Crittenden Breitbart, who sounds more in tune with the country as a whole?
Who sounds more in tune with the Republican party?
***Update***
For whatever weird reason I mistakenly wrote Crittenden when I meant Breitbart. Boo for proofreading.
ChrisA
And on the third day, Adam named the beasts, and the GOP beast was named DENIAL, because verily it could not look into the waters and see that it was hideous.
Crusty Dem
why and how can anyone read Crittenden? Jules is the trifecta of wingnut; Reliably wrong, recklessly obtuse, and remarkably smug. I am disappointed to share a kingdom, let alone a species with the fool.
par4
Crittenden sonds like ex-rep.Mark Foley.
Delia
Well, you know, Sarah Palin did so well and is so hot even though she’s as ignorant as a bug. Now all they have to do is round up a few Caribou Kens to go with her and they’ve got a winning strategy. What could possibly go wrong?
Snail
OK, I am confused. The Wash. Times column was written by Andrew Breitbart, not Jules Crittenden, as the Sadly, No folks mention. Why are we attributing it to Crittenden?
pharniel
the comments at the wash times are the best.
‘living wage’ caused outsourcing, becuase the unions were just asking for stupid things like a living wage.
seriously, someone needs to remind these fuckers what happens when ‘the people’ decide that the game is rigged and it’s time to play a new game.
I’m not QUITE to the point of yerning to hear the carts thunder through times square, but it’s getting pretty close.
The Moar You Know
Oh my. Certainly not gay, not at all.
ChrisA
Followed the links to the Washington Monthly article, Republicans Seek to Fix Short-Sitedness.
The money quote:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. . … Stop. . . .you guys are killing me.
AnneLaurie
Because nobody *minds* getting a pink slip, or having their house foreclosed, as long as the person doing so is "tanned, coiffed and seriously cut"!
Yeah, it’s not the Repub message that failed — they just need cuter messengers!
I think these people have given up on ever having real political power again. Now they just want some eye candy they can wank over while the world moves on without them.
Comrade Kevin
This is what happens when you base huge parts of your ideology on being against everything under the sun.
Zam
I really really hope the next wave of republicans are ex-models from local malls.
The Moar You Know
Actually, someone needs to remind the left of what happens when that occurs. I think the brains behind the right – you know, the people who stole all the money from all our institutions – already put in place a very successful PR plan where they commit the crime but the liberals – those union sons of bitches who insisted on a living wage – take the blame for the fall. As things stand, it will be union leaders, community organizers, hippies and public school teachers getting hauled to the guillotine as "enemies of the state".
We need some better PR for the low-information crowd and we need it soon. The day the shit hits the fan is well within sight.
Wag
"Because nobody minds getting a pink slip, or having their house foreclosed, as long as the person doing so is "tanned, coiffed and seriously cut"
…and won’t stand up to them if the "cut" men are wearing the brown shirts and black arm bands that have so sadly fallen out of fashion, but WILL RISE AGAIN IF WE ONLY HAVE THE COURAGE TO ELECT THE RIGHT PATRY NEXT TIME1
Oh, wait, I’m getting swept up in the fever.
Maybe we what we REALLY need is somebody in charge who is familiar with MORE than the gist of the Constitution…..
Steve V
This "what would Reagan do" nonsense really bugs me. They’ve made him such a monument now that they take it as a given that he was infallible.
Zifnab
It’s an extra forty flavors of stupid when they pound their fists and declare "Ronald Reagen would never –insert taboo here–!" when he’s done everything from raising taxes to appointing gay cabinet members to aggressively expanding government spending. These folks have absolutely no idea what Ronald Reagen would do.
Go for it! We need more brave men like Breitbart singing this shit from the rooftops. I want Playgirl centerfolds and Hollywood fashion models on every state ballot by 2010. Please, please, please let the neanderthal wing of the party piss away whatever fringe remains of credibility the GOP has left. Sarah Palin / Paris Hilton in ’12!
Mike
Me too, but for a different reason: when they say "Reagan" they mean "Sean Hannity". The real-life Reagan is the one who negotiated nuclear weapon reduction with Gorbachev, much to the horror of Cheney, Rumsfeld, and the rest of the warmongering neo-con scum.
jenniebee
Oh geez, it gets worse. It’s not just the clerks from the mall who he wants running for Congress, it’s also Hooters waitresses. Nothing against those girls, we’ve all got to make a living, but I can’t go past a Hooters without wanting to go in, sit my waitress down, and discuss her goals. Seriously, if you’re thinking about waiting tables at Hooters, just go into stripping, there’s a lot more money in it.
ninerdave
@Zifnab:
You’re missing the point Zif, it’s not about what Reagan would or wouldn’t have done, it’s about the fantasy of what Reagan would or wouldn’t have done.
Try this on for size:
If Reagan were around, he would have donned a cape, rushed into Congress and beat the snot our of all the socialist liberals, cut taxes to 0 to spur the economy, reduced wasteful spending, so that the government had a net profit every year AND Kicked the Russian’s ass again.
ninerdave
Cole, your comment filter is an assault of the first amendment!!!
Socialist.
Brian J
I’ve never read anything by Andrew Breibart before; it’s hard to see why I would ever again. That might be the single stupidest collection of words assembled in the last year. Considering that we just went through such a bizarre, absurd presidential election, that’s saying something.
There’s so much to laugh at, hate, and scratch one’s head over, and that’s leaving aside the odd homoerotic references and double entendres. In that ridiculous piece, his argument seems to be that conservatism needs a new face, which should be young and pretty and belong to those who can convince others that the Republican party now is the party of the future. It’s particularly amusing that he refers to all of the young people that supported Obama this time around as if they were "duped," if there’s no logic or thought behind the Democratic platform, just good intentions and great feelings. It’s also funny that he talks about young black and Hispanic conservatives and libertarians, as if this was an extensive pool of voters that had yet to be tapped.
And what is with the swipes at the Sanchez sisters and Henry Waxman? How is Henry Waxman responsible for Hollywood productions going to Canada and Mexico?
If this isn’t parody, then the Democrats are probably safe for many election cycles to come.
Cyrus
I’ve almost never seen models striking poses in storefronts. (If he meant young people actually playing football shirtless, I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen that inside a mall either.) Is he saying that he wants posters and mannequins to take over the Republican Party? Well, OK, I can’t blame him.
TenguPhule
This sounds like the plot of a bad horror movie.
All it needs to crown it as shining bad is Oppai Missiles.
Cyrus
I don’t think that’s fair. Paris Hilton is no more stupid or venal than most people who are famous for being famous, she’s just a more convenient target than most. And she made a witty anti-McCain video during the election.
jenniebee
This still just stuns me. It isn’t that he can’t tell the difference between an election and a contest for Chief of the Eloi; it’s that it doesn’t ever occur to him that mixing the two might turn out to be a bad thing.
But I suppose as long as you’re keeping those awful demand-side, union-loving Morlocks underground where they belong, nothing can possibly go wrong. Yay Eloi!
pharniel
@The Moar You Know: Far too true.
Unfortunatly I don’t see anyone spamming about how the banks and corporations are the reason these returning vets are unemployed, broken and broke when they return home.
if I were the democratic leadership, or knew more veterans that didn’t already have a clue, i’d be hammering the point that bush admin tries to chince them out of a few measly thousand dollars while spending MORE THAN IT COST FOR WWII to prop up failed financial instatutions and banks.
I had a stupid today and went to ace of spades. all they could talk about was how it was the union’s fault that the big three sucked and how no one deserved a bailout, and a million people out of work was the BESTEST PLAN EVAR!!!
then they wanked off to dick devoss/romni slash.
i might exagerate the last bit, but not by much.
Zifnab
@ninerdave:
I wish I was missing the point. Unfortunately, when you peg a political ideology to a man and then get that political ideology ass backwards and completely wrong just because Newest Radio/TV Personality told you otherwise, you end up with a political movement that has absolutely no foundation.
That’s kinda the root of the problem with the GOP. They don’t stand for anything anymore. Two icons get into a pissing match and the entire movement grinds to a halt as everyone tries to figure out what feel-good nonsense slogan to rally around next – see: Immigration, Iraq, the current economic fuck up.
GOoPers come to a fork in the road and Sean Hannity declares "Reagen would go left!", then they come to another fork and Johan Goldberg declares "Reagen would go right!", and by the time they’re done they’re completely out in the wilderness without a care in the world that they’re lost because they’re too busy fighting over which way Reagen would turn next.
Skullduggery
To be fair to Breitbart, I would do anything that Zac Efron told me to. Did you see his arms in HSM3? Hotter than a Palin Chew-Me,-Sue-Me,-Everybody-Do-Me Wink™
mikkel
To be fair, this strategy worked for the Nazis, e.g. Triumph of the Will.
Damn I Godwin’d the thread fast.
If you haven’t watched it it can be summarized as:
boring shots of Hitler traveling and yelling sandwiched around the greatest piece of militaristic homoerotica ever recorded. I can’t get over that they show several minutes of hundreds of young, perfect, half clothed German men festively washing together and doing "manly" work then getting rewarded with sausages, wrestling and human pyramid construction.
Zifnab
@Cyrus:
Fair enough. Sarah Palin / Heidi Montag. I just don’t think (or perhaps I just hope and pray) most people don’t know who the hell Heidi Montag is. I just liked Paris as a symbol of established incompetence embraced for no apparent reason. Kinda like Sarah Palin.
demimondian
@jenniebee: Ha! I’d love to see what 28 percent would do with that. Quotations from _The Time Machine_, indeed.
Comrade Kevin
My god, it’s Barrens Chat!
demimondian
@mikkel: This whole Godwin business has got to stop, dude. This has *nothing* to do with _Triumph of the Will_.
It’s pure Socialist realism.
TheAssInTheHatOnMyCat(Formerly Comrade Tax Analyst)
Actually, it’s a bit of an uncomfortable stretch to tag Paris as "incompetent". Although one may have little use for the "brand", she surely is one, and a highly profitable one at that. I’m pretty sure that whatever she doesn’t know is mostly from "indifference" rather than "incompetent" or "stupidity". A lot of people assume her wealth is strictly from inheritance, but that’s not at all true.
Without making a judgment as to her abilities or the quality of her products one should note she has worked as a model, actress, and as a musician in the past. She now gets paid significant sums just to SHOW UP at fashion affairs. She gets paid to be in silly "reality" TV programming and has her own purse lines and perfumes, hair extensions and footwear. As a result, Paris earned approximately $2 million in 2003–2004, $6.5 million in 2004–2005,and $7 million in 2005–2006. It’s rather apparent that Paris does much more than just by the pool all day.
So while you might call her "America’s National Skank", I would suggest "incompetent" is a real poor fit.
binzinerator
Isn’t this supposed to be Sarah Palin’s future too?
Jay C
Steve Benen made this very point on Political Animal , using everybody’s favorite "rightroot" bloviator as an example (well, a piñata, really):
Indeed, to help drive the point home, earlier this year, Erick Erickson, RedState’s editor, acknowledged that the "netroots" have an advantage over the "rightroots," but attributed it to an asymmetry in free time, since conservatives "have families because we don’t abort our kids, and we have jobs because we believe in capitalism."
A tidy encapsulation of the "asymmetry" right there: Erick E. can’t even respond to a meta-question about the relative influence of lefty/righty blogs without reflexive resort to puerile insults, seasoned with a healthy dash of self-righteousness. AND: he apparently remains blissfully clueless that stupid answers like this merely make the (negative) point against him better than any "leftist’s" argument ever could.
kommrade reproductive vigor
And Jules would be tossing something else.
Wow. That was a frightening peek into the fReichtard psyche. Like a Matt Sanchez movie shot in a House of Mirrors. I kan haz brain bleach plz?
libarbarian
"Yglesias, Klein, and company" are only center-left to the liberal MSM. Real Americans from the Real parts of America see them for the radical leftwing crypto-socialists surrender-monkeys they are.
Correct. So-called center-left blogs are deeply unserious places that waste time with "analysis of health care reform, urban planning, education, and many other issues" while a truly serious person would instantly recognize these things as the socialist perils they are and move onto more important debates such as whether to carpet bomb Mecca preemptively or use the threat to blackmail them.
MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! My world has no loose ends!! No doubts plague my existence!!
I am RIGHTWING BLOGGER MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!
Johnny Pez
Ha! And you all thought Zoolander was fiction!
Grumpy Code Monkey
Is that Breitbart column meant to be taken seriously? It’s not supposed to be parody?
Glocksman
I hope that’s a parody, because if it’s not, Bill Buckley is spinning in his grave so fast we could hook him up to a dynamo and power New York City.
If he’s serious, this thinking gives us the gift of a Sarah Palin/Michele Bachmann ticket in 2012.
Their campaign slogan: ‘We’re hot and you’re not’. :)