Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

Something needs to be done about our bogus SCOTUS.

An almost top 10,000 blog!

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

They’re not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

Republicans in disarray!

When your entire life is steeped in white supremacy, equality feels like discrimination.

If you are still in the GOP, you are an extremist.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

The willow is too close to the house.

In my day, never was longer.

Seems like a complicated subject, have you tried yelling at it?

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

Everyone is in a bubble, but some bubbles model reality far better than others!

Following reporting rules is only for the little people, apparently.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

Fuck the extremist election deniers. What’s money for if not for keeping them out of office?

It’s the corruption, stupid.

Russian mouthpiece, go fuck yourself.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

Good lord, these people are nuts.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

Ron DeSantis, the grand wizard, oops, governor of FL

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92Comments

  2. 2.

    J. Michael Neal

    I’m at my folks’ place in Ann Arbor. I realized that it’s a damned shame that Lions’ home games are blacked out around here. The road games should be blacked out, too.

  5. 5.

    cyntax

    @J. Michael Neal:

    Or to put it another way, who’s f*cked stuff up badly enough that they do deserve to be played by Tom Cruise? I’m gonna start the bidding with Douglas Feith.

  6. 6.

    Crusty Dem

    anybody got a link to a web stream of Steelers-Titans? I’m stuck w/Cardinals-Pats in NE, even though it’s 3,000 miles away… The Cardinals look like they’re playing on an ice rink wearing dress shoes. Not pretty.

  7. 7.

    JL

    @Crusty Dem: In the Atlanta area we are getting both games. The New England game is interesting though. Arizona has decided that they can slide for the first down.

  11. 11.

    Crusty Dem

    Ok, I was upset about Cards-Pats, but at least I’m not watching Niners-Rams (I had to watch Rams-Seahawks last week. Brutal waste of HDTV bandwidth).

    Query: While I won’t make the argument that the Cards are the worst playoff team of all time, they have to be the worst playoff team to ever lock up their spot after 13 games, right? Can’t run. Can’t play D, QB is a bit flaky (good this year, but hit him twice and who knows what’ll happen…). I find it depressing that out of Eagles/Bears/Bucs/Falcons, only 2 teams will make the playoffs, but the Cards locked it up 2 weeks ago. Of course, the AFC has the same problem in the West with the Broncos. That is a TERRIBLE team (channeling Bill Walton). Horrible team. Ugh.

  12. 12.

    DougJ

    The War on Christmas continues! Wes Welker was just given a fifteen yard unsportsmanlike penalty for making a snow angel after a touchdown.

  13. 13.

    JGabriel

    Cyntax:

    Or to put it another way, who’s f*cked stuff up badly enough that they do deserve to be played by Tom Cruise?

    George Bush?

    I think Cruise, circa Bartender especially but present day Cruise as well, would bring the perfect mix of alcoholism, frat boy stupidity, and religious credulousness/fundamentalism/simplisticness to the role.

    .

  18. 18.

    J. Michael Neal

    I can think of a number of characters in Valkyrie that deserve to have Cruise play them. Quite aside from the evil motherfuckers involved, a lot of the people in the conspiracy were nominally on the side of the good guys, but were moral cowards and practically useless. Most of them were concerned a lot more with the fact that the Germans were losing than that the Nazis were on the side of the devil. I’d happily pitch most of them under the bus, or slap them in the face.

    Stauffenberg just isn’t one of them.

  19. 19.

    bago

    The snowtards are coming out in force for a football game, despite the snow. There are people snowboarding in front of my house, and I went yesterday.

  20. 20.

    John Cole

    There are two acceptable ways to eat a hot dog. One is a chili dog with cole slaw, which is my personal favorite.

    The second is a chicago dog.

    Anything else is just a waste of time.

  23. 23.

    cyntax

    @JGabriel:

    I think Cruise, circa Bartender especially but present day Cruise as well, would bring the perfect mix of alcoholism, frat boy stupidity, and religious credulousness/fundamentalism/simplisticness to the role.

    There definitely is something about Cruise’s ouevre that highlights some of the most lame-ass tendencies people can possibly display.

  25. 25.

    JL

    No need to call O’Reilly on the snow angel incident.. According the the football blog on Boston.com

    After Wes Welker caught an 11-yard touchdown pass in the second quarter, he was penalized for unsportsmanlike conduct after making snow angels on the field.

    The rule enforced by Bill Leavy’s crew is that a player can not go to the ground in an act of celebration, as it is deemed excessive. The only time a player may go to the ground in that situation is to pray.

    You can go to the ground and pray. Wes Welker should have knelt and asked God why the fuck couldn’t he make snow angels.

  26. 26.

    J. Michael Neal

    There are two acceptable ways to eat a hot dog. One is a chili dog with cole slaw, which is my personal favorite.

    The second is a chicago dog.

    Anything else is just a waste of time.

    The only acceptable way to eat a hot dog is if it’s really a kielbasa.

  27. 27.

    bago

    There’s is only one way to eat a hot dog. You are slumming it in the middle of the desert and nobody has any meat because they are all hippies.

  28. 28.

    smiley

    @John Cole: I love slaw on a hot dog. The only problem is that it turns a hot sandwich into a cold sandwich. I prefer hot. And I’ve never understood why it’s so wrong to put ketchup on a hot dog. Mustard and ketchup on a dog tastes good! I’ll put ketchup on it if I want to, damn it.

  29. 29.

    Reverend Dennis

    Chili and cheese on a hot dog. And it must be eaten with a baseball game going on in front of it.

  31. 31.

    Libby Spencer

    This has to the slowest thread in the history of Balloonjuice.

    I’ve got nothing to add except the only hot dog you’ll catch me eating is a Fenway frank with lots of mustard or one that’s charred black off the barbecue with lots of mustard and coleslaw.

    On a different note, I’ll probably never do this again, but if anyone wonders what I really look like, well, now’s your chance.

  33. 33.

    Zuzu's Petals

    OT re football, but …

    I’m curious as to what sorts of accomodations folks are making for the Christmas weather.

    I just changed my travel plans due to projected weather here (Sacto) and my destination. Going on New Year’s instead.

    So am stocking up on firewood, paperback mysteries, and various delectables. Will probably take myself out to a movie on Christmas day, but will have to fend for myself foodwise as most restaurants are closed.

    What about you guys?

  34. 34.

    J. Michael Neal

    Gah. Would someone get the CBS announcers to stop yakking about turnovers being the most "determinative" stat in football? No, they aren’t. The traditional stat that has the highest correlation with winning percentage in the NFL is yards per passing attempt. If you get a bunch of yards when you put the ball in the air, you win.

    Another problem is that there is a large luck factor in turnovers and turnover margin. There is a skill in getting and avoiding interceptions; teams that are good at it, in either direction, in the past tend to be good at it in the future. Forcing and avoiding fumbles has a small skill element. Recovering fumbles is almost entirely luck. It has no repeatability.

    Lastly, the statement that turnovers are deterministic of victory is true only if you consider punts to be turnovers. Which they are. Punting is sometimes the right thing to do, but coaches would be more successful if they understood that a punt is exactly the same thing as an interception. On one play, you have the ball. On the next, the other guy has the ball. Anytime that happens, it’s a turnover, whether you did it deliberately or not.

  35. 35.

    smiley

    @Libby Spencer: Libby, you know that a manatee is not a fish right? You just reacted to a large sea creature and thought it had to be a fish, right? I’m trying to help you here.

  37. 37.

    smiley

    @J. Michael Neal:

    The traditional stat that has the highest correlation with winning percentage in the NFL is yards per passing attempt.

    Who knew? I always thought it was points scored.

  38. 38.

    smiley

    @Zuzu’s Petals: Not sure what you’re saying there Z’sP but another name for a manatee is sea cow. Was it a fat joke? Everyone knows we all love fat jokes.

    – The senator from Massachusetts is sooo fat he makes a manatee look like a greyhound. rimshot

    – Did you hear that the senator from Massachusetts went swimming in Florida? The locals thought he was a Manatee. rimshot

    – My wife hates having to slow the boat down once we enter the Inter coastal waterway.. That’s right. She actually wants to run over Senator Kennedy. rimshot, cymbal

    etc.

    Seriously, what’s your point?

  39. 39.

    D-Chance.

    Noontime was no NFC game, AFC game was Cards/Pats. Only game available… a 47-7 blowout.

    Second games are Hou/Oakland and a Philly/Skins game that was 3-0 at the half.

    Oh, yeah. Sunday NFL is teh suck this week.

  40. 40.

    Laura W

    @Zuzu’s Petals: I plan to spend the day working on my book-in-progress: "The Purposeless, Treading Water, Going Nowhere Fast Aimlessly Life."

    I have six bottles of Mumm’s sparklers chilling in the mud (cat litter box) room, thanks to impulse buying on Winewoot.com.
    I have an organic Bottom Round Roast Something or Other to cook. Crock Pot or Oven? I go round and round. (Get it?) I’m searching online recipes like a demon. I don’t even know what it is, and I don’t even cook, but goddamnit I’m gonna cook that beast. Maybe cauliflower mock mashed potatoes, and a broccoli cheese casserole. These would be my futile attempts to resume my Low Carb Lifestyle (Don’t call it a diet! It is a WOL.)

    I’m mad that Santa is not going to bring me a TeeVee with DVD player for the bedroom (unless he goes to WalMart and risks being trampled over the next few days). I’d love to watch a bunch of movies I’ve missed, but somehow the screen on the MacBook Pro just doesn’t quite render up the clarity, plus the sound majorly sucks.

    Pretty much I’ll probably just play Joni Mitchell’s "Blue" on endless loop and sob.
    Some traditions are worth keeping.

  43. 43.

    tom p

    and no, I don’t know the right ones… I have threatened several purveyors of hot dog stands with various unmentionables (these guys must have been thru SERE training) and none of them will tell me what they use. But the best of them sell dogs that don’t need anything.

  45. 45.

    Zuzu's Petals

    @Laura W:

    Wow, I’d come keep you company…except for the roast beef part. Oh yes, and the travel part.

    Nothing personal on the roast beef, I’m just a vegetarian. The veggies on the other hand, sound deelish.

  48. 48.

    Comrade Kevin

    @ninerdave:

    How about that comeback! Damn!! That was exciting!

    The last five minutes certainly were much better. Shaun Hill is still pretty bad, and O’Sullivan is worse, though.

  49. 49.

    2liberal

    I like Whizenhunt (sp?). I hope he survives this years bloodletting at the AZ Cards front office. Let him develop some of his younger players and then see how the team does.

  50. 50.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    I have just discovered (thanks to strangeapparatus at YTD) that someone was posting using my handle at big pink. Not unusual considering I stole it from BBC America’s tag line (my other online handle is Truebrit), however it is WHAT they posted that concerns me to wit:

    "Hope you aren’t the same "Litlebritdifrnt" who posted this over at HillaryIs44 regarding Obama naming Hillary as VP:

    Posted by Litlebritdifrnt at 2008-08-11 09:44 PM | Reply | Flag:

    Hopefully if it is true then I can only hope, she plans to take Bambi out once shes secured the VP nod, perhaps Hillary realises its the only way shes going to get into that position. Its what i would do. Slip in the nominee backdoor then shoot him between the eyes."

    Holy F**k! I am only reassured by the fact that the majority of people who know my on-line persona know that I would a) never post at Big Pink unless to mock and b) would never post such a thing. In fact I was one of those people who said that Barack should NEVER pick Hillary as VP for this exact reason (ask em over at DR) . Is there anyway of figuring out who this imposter is?

  51. 51.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    PS) DH is sick, (probably got the creeping crud from me) so dinner tonight is home made beef stew and dumplings with lots of fresh out of the oven home made bread for dipping. I spoil him.

  52. 52.

    Bob In Pacifica

    Not a big hotdog fan, but I had one at a Dairy Queen before my diabetes diagnosis which had cheese and bacon on it. Any kind of meat with bacon sprinkled on it is okay with me.

    But how about those Niners! Down 16-3 halfway through the fourth quarter and they come alive, 17-16. Since the end of the Mariucci Era the Niners tend to win meaningless games at the end of the year, but it was nice for them to get this one without Gore.

    Maybe Tom Cruise can get the lead in the Jonah Goldberg Story, although I have to admit he was a hoot in Tropical Thunder.

  53. 53.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    I cannot stand the poison dwarf (Tom Cruise), the only movie he was in that was half way worth watching (well other than Top Gun but that was for other reasons), was a thing about a military academy which he did when he was in his teens. (Thanks to IMDB "Taps") Other than that he even managed to screw up the remake of War of the Worlds, which I thought was a damn tragedy. Oh and "A few good men" wasn’t half bad. (no thanks to Cruise)

  54. 54.

    Laura W

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    I am only reassured by the fact that the majority of people who know my on-line persona know that I would a) never

    make so many egregious and obvious spelling and punctuation errors, thank you very much.

    I think DH’s illness is very well-timed indeed. Keeps him from smelling/noticing the long-lost prodigal orange boy come home all repentant and humbed, with his nub tail tucked ‘tween his legs.
    Amirite?

  56. 56.

    tom p

    I like Whizenhunt (sp?). I hope he survives this years bloodletting at the AZ Cards front office. Let him develop some of his younger players and then see how the team does.

    As a long time STL Big Red fan, I can assure you, Billy Bidwell will screw it up in the end. And, I really like Kurt W coming back to rub it in everybodies faces (no, he ain’t Joe Montana, but when he is at his best, there ain’t nobody better)

    But how about those Niners! Down 16-3 halfway through the fourth quarter and they come alive, 17-16.

    Against who? Oh yeah… the STL Lambs… Long time gone, the Greatest Show on Turf (Kurt W again… and others).

    I cannot stand the poison dwarf (Tom Cruise), the only movie he was in that was half way worth watching (well other than Top Gun but that was for other reasons),

    Yeah, I ain’t real fond of the little F either (on a personal level), but he was really good in "Collateral" (of course, Jamie Foxx made that movie) and I still have a fond place in my heart for "Risky Business"

  57. 57.

    Adrienne

    The only time a player may go to the ground in that situation is to pray. You can go to the ground and pray. Wes Welker should have knelt and asked God why the fuck couldn’t he make snow angels.

    FTW.

  58. 58.

    Zuzu's Petals

    @Laura W:

    Your mom and gram live in a very cool place. But trust me, you don’t want to be flying, much less driving, in this weather.

    Weather alert

    I hate that I won’t be sharing my grandbaby’s first Christmas, but Portland is pretty much snowed/iced in. Plus, at age six weeks, baby probably doesn’t much care about it.

  59. 59.

    robertdsc

    Sunday NFL is teh suck this week.

    Perhaps the blimp companies can swing by John’s house to get a shot of Tunch since they’re wasting their time with the games today.

  60. 60.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    @Laura W:

    Actually this morning while DH was doing the sunday morning DH thing, watching ancient westerns on tv in the bedroom while waiting for his breakfast in bed (ham, cheese and mushroom omlette, steak, hashbrowns and french toast – yes, yes I KNOW I spoil him, but he earns it he works so hard), I wandered in to give him his silverware and condiments and he was looking out of the bedroom window and then looking around the room "what’s the problem babe?" I ask, "I can hear a cat crying but can’t figure out where it is" "ah well" says I, "thatwouldbearnamadewhohasbeenmissingforthreemonthsandIamtryingtoreintroducehimtothehouseholdbutheislivingunderthebedrightnow" (breath). "oh okay" he says "how long til breakfast?"

    *phew*

  62. 62.

    Laura W

    @Litlebritdifrnt: HA!
    I love happy endings.
    You know your way around your DH for sure, girl.
    (There was a white boxer somewhere in a NC shelter needing rescue in my yahoo email inbox. "Winston". Nearly forwarded to you, but lucky for you, I don’t have your email. You’re welcome.)

  66. 66.

    Reverend Dennis

    Perhaps the blimp companies can swing by John’s house to get a shot of Tunch since they’re wasting their time with the games today.

    As long as there’s a voiceover explaining which shot is of the blimp and which is of Tunch.

  67. 67.

    Laura W

    @Litlebritdifrnt: Sorry, my bad… he’s at York Shelter in SC and "has till Monday". I followed your link but it’s a web site form and I have this email that’s been passed on to dog knows how many rescue groups. Too hard to cut and paste into an online form deal.
    If you want me to send you the email forward, write me at lauraw217 at yahoo.com and I’ll just send it to you directly. He sure does look like Cueball, only smaller, maybe. Cute guy.

  69. 69.

    ChrisB

    Here we are discussing Tom Cruise in a football thread and no one has mentioned All the Right Moves, which is the Tom Cruise movie I have a soft spot for. But then again I liked One on One with Robby Benson.

  70. 70.

    Phoenix Woman

    @Reverend Dennis: Do not mock the Great Tunch! (Or he’ll have you for lunch.)

    That puts me in mind of poor Socks, who is shuffling off this mortal coil as I type. He was fourteen pounds of leggy tomcat goodness in his prime, and with not an ounce of fat on him — just a big ol’ rangy tombeast.

  71. 71.

    Laura W

    @Litlebritdifrnt: Winston Churchill.There are four total of him on my new Flicker thing. I guess if there is interest, best to call before he is "PTS" tomorrow.
    Poor John. Once again his prominent political (football, video game, cooking, drinking, neti pot, exfoliating foot bath, nose hair clipper) blog has been turned into pet rescue.

  72. 72.

    r€nato

    Someday, Arizona will have a professional football franchise. Until then, we’re stuck with the Cardinals.

  74. 74.

    jmbl

    Go Raiduhs! Maybe crazy old Al won’t look like an outraged sea monster this week. 49ers won too. Maybe someday soon, professional football will return to the SF Bay Area!

  77. 77.

    ninerdave

    Shaun Hill is still pretty bad,

    Best the Niners have. He shows flashes, and considering he’s only started what…six games in his entire life? I’ll give him a pass for now.

  80. 80.

    Punchy

    About threw up watchin the HATED Giantz cum back 2 win dat game. Unfukinreal. Mah Bearz need 2 win w/ Forte getting…..oh…..about 50 fantasy pts, otherwise I’m fantasy fucked.

  81. 81.

    AnneLaurie

    Will probably take myself out to a movie on Christmas day, but will have to fend for myself foodwise as most restaurants are closed.

    Check the local Chinese restaurants. Here on the East Coast, they usually do a roaring business on Xmas because they’re the only places open. I’m looking forward to potstickers & Singapore rice stick with the Spousal Unit, hopefully after we finally get to the one theatre in the area that’s showing Doubt.

  83. 83.

    Zuzu's Petals

    @AnneLaurie:

    You know, I’ve heard that’s true. And like Jeff says, I have Jewish friends who swear it’s a tradition. That and going to Costa Rica for the holidays.

  85. 85.

    Bill Belichick

    I’d just like to thank "Coach" Eric Mini-me Mangini for that bangup job he did in Seattle yesterday. Top notch work, from beginning to end!

  86. 86.

    J.

    Still having fun, JC?

    Thanks for the kudos "Bill Belichick." I have no doubt that Coach Mangini and his crew will be handsomely rewarded with new jobs, with some other team(s) for Christmas.

    Personally, I am now looking forward to a Giants vs. Titans matchup (new QB vs. old QB).

    (I just love the site of big, burly guys, running around sleeveless in sub-zero temps. Don’t you?)

  88. 88.

    Bob In Pacifica

    As someone said above, the Niners beat a bad team. True, true, but they played a terrible three quarters (offensively) and still managed to win. If you’ve been watching the team the last six years you know that that’s an improvement.

    There are still things to do. They have a good "character guy" Michael Robinson backing up at running back who can’t find a hole or a lane. He must average two yards a carry. He was an experiment, was a running quarterback in college. Thomas Clayton needs to be activated, especially with Frank Gore still limping.

    The Niners could use a pass-rushing stud on the D-line and an answer at right tackle on the O-line. And it would be nice to have a fast wideout.

    But the Niners seem to be a team on the rise, and considering their division they could be back on top of the NFC West next year, especially if Bolden goes somewhere else in the off-season.

  91. 91.

    burnspbesq

    I hardly ever watch the NFL. I’m a soccer guy. But I’m glad I watched the Giants – Panthers game. That was quality.

  92. 92.

    Jamey

    Dogs with slaw?

    I’m just surprised to learn that there’s a West Virginia cuisine, and that it’s not made primarily of roadkill.

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