• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

Come on, man.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”

Anyone who bans teaching American history has no right to shape America’s future.

And we’re all out of bubblegum.

Fuck the extremist election deniers. What’s money for if not for keeping them out of office?

The next time the wall wtreet journal editorial board speaks the truth will be the first.

I see no possible difficulties whatsoever with this fool-proof plan.

Prediction: the GOP will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

fuckem (in honor of the late great efgoldman)

The GOP couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

If you are still in the GOP, you are an extremist.

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

Consistently wrong since 2002

Nothing worth doing is easy.

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

Meanwhile over at truth Social, the former president is busy confessing to crimes.

Schmidt just says fuck it, opens a tea shop.

Mobile Menu

  • Winnable House Races
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • Balloon Juice 2023 Pet Calendar (coming soon)
  • COVID-19 Coronavirus
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • War in Ukraine
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • 2021-22 Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Sports / Taking One For the Team

Taking One For the Team

by John Cole|  January 15, 200910:17 am| 24 Comments

This post is in: Sports

FacebookTweetEmail

I support this:

Steelers Nation is gripped by playoff fever and it seems the man in charge of Pittsburgh has been severely afflicted.

Mayor Luke Ravenstahl has asked to be known as Luke Steelerstahl — at least for this week.

“On behalf of the Steelers Nation, I’ve decided to remove the word ‘Ravens’ from my name just like the Steelers will remove them from the AFC Championship,” he told the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, in regards to the upcoming playoff game against the Baltimore Ravens.

Ravenstahl began the process of a legal name change, but his paperwork has not gone through because it wasn’t complete. The civil court in Pittsburgh also said it didn’t receive the required $108 check to process the request, the Post-Gazette said.

Stupid, a waste of time, but funny.

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « They Bring The Funny
Next Post: Question »

Reader Interactions

24Comments

  1. 1.

    r€nato

    January 15, 2009 at 10:20 am

    But will Phoenix mayor Phil Gordon show solidarity with the Cards by changing his name to Phoe Gordon?

    Also, Philadelphia Eagles delenda est.

  2. 2.

    Desargues

    January 15, 2009 at 10:25 am

    But Stahl is German for ‘steel’ (cf. also the Russian Stalin, ‘Steely’). So the honourable mayor should just drop the prefix ‘ravens-‘ from his name, and leave it at that. He should go with Luke Stahl. It’s cooler than Steelerstahl, which just means "steeler’s steel." That’s dumb.

  3. 3.

    wilfred the shoe throwing Norwegian

    January 15, 2009 at 10:27 am

    Luke Ravenstahl to Luke Steelerstahl.

    Gothrock to GayPorn?

  4. 4.

    r€nato

    January 15, 2009 at 10:27 am

    …well actually, shoulda been Ariz Gordon.

    shit. I suck.

  5. 5.

    Adolphus

    January 15, 2009 at 10:31 am

    When the Ravens win, and the Steelers have therefore failed to remove the Ravens from the AFC championship, will he make the change permanent.

    And I am not up on where the Steelers and Pittsburgh stand on the new-stadium-and-public-official-blackmail cycle, but I wonder if the Steelers will show the same civic spirit the next time they want the good people of Pittsburgh to pay for more well appointed luxury boxes.

  6. 6.

    horatius

    January 15, 2009 at 10:41 am

    Great!! Tempting the football gods repeatedly. Mission Accomplished. Ravens to anal rape the Stillers in the AFC championship. Ed Reed notches two touchdowns, and BenBurger notches up his fourth concussion.

  7. 7.

    Bootlegger

    January 15, 2009 at 10:43 am

    Parker takes the handoff and looks for a hole, Big Ben sits in a collapsing pocket, the linemen knock, knock, knocking on the door. Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

  8. 8.

    Tim F.

    January 15, 2009 at 10:49 am

    We have the dumbest mayor in history. Too bad the last time a Republican won Pittsburgh was called the-hilly-junction-of-three-rivers-that-often-floods, so Ravenstool basically has a lifetime appointment.

  9. 9.

    Keith G

    January 15, 2009 at 11:01 am

    Ok, I thought that it was agreed that the sports related phrase, "_____ nation" would not be used (with the possible exception in relation to the Red Socks) after New Years.

    It needs to be retired, hopefully along with "game-changer", "tipping point", "gaining traction" and "informed".

  10. 10.

    Bootlegger

    January 15, 2009 at 11:09 am

    @Keith G: Or this gem that makes me puke every time: "The team that wants it more will win." Cuz at that level, you know, most athletes just don’t want it.

  11. 11.

    Jay Severin Has A Small Pen1s

    January 15, 2009 at 11:23 am

    Do they still make steel in Pittsburgh?

    Maybe he should change his name to ‘Abject Poverty’ for the week.

  12. 12.

    Keith G

    January 15, 2009 at 11:25 am

    @bootlegger: My retching point is during the now universal keys to the game segment (sponsored by….) which always includes such gems as: They’ve got to convert on third down, or they must take away the long pass. No sh%t.

  13. 13.

    DougJ

    January 15, 2009 at 11:40 am

    I say we publish his address and have everyone send him Ray Lewis starter jerseys. That’s the only appropriate response here.

  14. 14.

    gbear

    January 15, 2009 at 11:42 am

    What is this ‘football’ of which you speak?

  15. 15.

    Mazacote Yorquest

    January 15, 2009 at 11:54 am

    This is not nearly as embarrassing as the name change forced on the mayor of Boise, Luke Airportstahl.

  16. 16.

    blackfrancis789

    January 15, 2009 at 12:02 pm

    @Keith G: now that’s thinking outside of the box!

    Just a few more days until Ben Worthlessburger is in his proper place. Tossed from the NFl playoffs.

  17. 17.

    Bill Belichick

    January 15, 2009 at 12:16 pm

    In related news John Cole, gripped by the rut, changes his name to "Thom" Brady in the hopes of landing himself a supermodel to call his own. The ploy appeared to pay off when he was contacted by "Jisele" Bundchen. Things went limp when Jisele turned out to be former tennis player Renee Richards and Thom turned out to be, well Cole. Both immediately purchase high end spell checkers.

    Stay tuned for further developments…

  18. 18.

    Paul in KY

    January 15, 2009 at 12:57 pm

    IMO, ‘Luke Steelerstahl’ sounds like a German pornstar name.

  19. 19.

    r€nato

    January 15, 2009 at 1:07 pm

    It needs to be retired, hopefully along with "game-changer", "tipping point", "gaining traction" and "informed".

    indeed, all of these tired sports cliches have jumped the shark and should be thrown under the bus.

  20. 20.

    Mazacote Yorquest

    January 15, 2009 at 1:12 pm

    I love the "football" modifiers: "football" field, "move the football," "great football play," a real "football player". As if, without those continual specifications, I might mistakenly think the player was a bowler, or that Heinz Field was a cricket pitch, or that the reverse was actually best understood as a brilliant jai alai event.

  21. 21.

    passerby

    January 15, 2009 at 1:18 pm

    Stupid, a waste of time, but funny.

    No, it’s not a stupid waste of time. Anyone who lives in an area that has an NFL team knows the excitement and energy it can generate during playoff season.

    The people are in a better mood and grocery stores have their party food displays at full bore. (Most) everyone gets the fever, and during the game there’s not a soul on the streets.

    We can’t do much about the economy except hope for the best. We can’t do much about whether our team wins or loses but we’re excited and partying as we hope for the best.

    So, Ravenstahl changing his name may seem frivolous, but it’s all in good fun and I’m happy for Pittsburgh and its well-known fan-dam-tastic fandom.

    Signed,

    Long-suffering Saints fan forced to live vicariously.

    p.s. uh..but after this weekend I want Card to win.

  22. 22.

    snoey

    January 15, 2009 at 2:08 pm

    Anyone who lives in an area that has an NFL team knows the excitement and energy it can generate during playoff season.

    Well most everybody.

    By the time the Vikings were in their fourth Superbowl it was mostly hide in your living room with maybe some cheese and crackers and a sixer of cheap beer hoping that they wouldn’t embarass us too much this time.

  23. 23.

    passerby

    January 15, 2009 at 2:20 pm

    @snoey:

    By the time the Vikings were in their fourth Superbowl it was mostly hide in your living room with maybe some cheese and crackers and a sixer of cheap beer hoping that they wouldn’t embarass us too much this time.

    Heh. You’re describing 30 years (give or take 2 or 3) of regular-seasons for Saints fans.

  24. 24.

    Limniade

    January 15, 2009 at 2:50 pm

    The Vikings prefer their humiliating performances to be played in front of as large an audience as possible. Regular season just doesn’t cut it.

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

2023 Pet Calendars

Pet Calendar Preview: A
Pet Calendar Preview: B

*Calendars can not be ordered until Cafe Press gets their calendar paper in.

Recent Comments

  • James E Powell on Medium Cool – Give Us A Song and Tell Us Your Story (Jan 30, 2023 @ 12:13am)
  • satby on Florida Man No More (Jan 30, 2023 @ 12:11am)
  • eclare on Florida Man No More (Jan 30, 2023 @ 12:03am)
  • mrmoshpotato on Florida Man No More (Jan 30, 2023 @ 12:02am)
  • eclare on Florida Man No More (Jan 30, 2023 @ 12:01am)

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
We All Need A Little Kindness
Favorite Dogs & Cats
Classified Documents: A Primer

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup

Front-pager Twitter

John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
TaMara
David Anderson
ActualCitizensUnited

Shop Amazon via this link to support Balloon Juice   

Join the Fight!

Join the Fight Signup Form
All Join the Fight Posts

Balloon Juice Events

5/14  The Apocalypse
5/20  Home Away from Home
5/29  We’re Back, Baby
7/21  Merging!

Balloon Juice for Ukraine

Donate

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2023 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!