Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

Historically it was a little unusual for the president to be an incoherent babbling moron.

The party of Reagan has become the party of Putin.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

Just because you believe it, that doesn’t make it true.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

Schmidt just says fuck it, opens a tea shop.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

This really is a full service blog.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

John Fetterman: Too Manly for Pennsylvania.  Paid for by the Oz for Senator campaign.

Good lord, these people are nuts.

I did not have telepathic declassification on my 2022 bingo card.

Hot air and ill-informed banter

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For DougJ

by | 89 Comments

This post is in: 

Just got back from dinner. I went to a small place that has a restaurant and bar main section with a little mini-bar attached, and as always, because I am antisocial and the only reason I went out for dinner was because I didn’t want to cook, and not because I had some great urge to deal with idiots who got housed at Happy Hour, I sneaked up to the minibar with my dinner to watch the news alone (the mini-bar portion doesn’t open until eight, so I am literally the only person in there, with chairs on top of the bar). I go there about once every couple of weeks, and the staff all know me (Hey, Norm!!!!), so they don’t pay attention to me, just the way I like it. At any rate, the satellite radio was on some craptacular station that was playing all sorts of dreck that makes me want to retch (Four Non Blondes, etc.), so when one of the wait staff came in I asked them to change the channel. They flipped through the channels, until I heard some Cypress Hill and told them to stop.

This was the very next song (and this it the part for DougJ):

I just gave up at that point, although whoever runs the satellite station totally redeemed themselves with several songs featuring Chris Cornell.

At any rate, you all asked for a cocktail open thread, and even though I didn’t have any tonight, here it is. Also, as an apology for the Creed, here is some Cypress and then some Cornell:

And, as a bonus, Rage:

At any rate, I am blogged out. Have at it.

*** Update ***

Upon reflection, the music in this thread really isn’t appropriate for “cocktail hour,” and probably better suited for “I’m 21, I have a handle full of Maker’s Mark, a pocket full of cash, and a get out of jail free card,” but whatever. I’m going to go listen to some Elastica at ear-bleeding volumes. Because I can. And if you tell me my taste in music sucks, the next ten threads will be nothing but Pantera. Why? Again, because I can. Suck. On. That.

Reader Interactions

89Comments

  1. 1.

    arguingwithsignposts

    Tomlin is about to be on Countdown with KO. Apparently he’s a huge fan of Countdown. Your steelers pr0n for the evening.

  2. 2.

    demkat620

    My husband just called B-Rod, Blowevich. He mangles the english language on a regular basis, so, I think this is a close as he is gonna get.

  5. 5.

    Dave C

    I think there needs to be a reckoning done and amends made for the completely undeserved mocking of Sunny Day Real Estate that occurred here earlier today (see "Aw, Poor Babies"). Using an SDRE song as a musical illustration of Republican antics is a slap in the face to all right-thinking ’90’s indie rock fans. And we shall not stand for it, Sir!

  7. 7.

    Conservatively Liberal

    Ten Pantera posts? Go for it. I double dog dare ya. ;)

    Cocktail Hour? Fuck that, I prefer Bong Hit Day. All day, every day. THEN comes the cocktail hour, if I am so inclined. I am usually not though as I am not much of a drinker but I was regularly the last man standing in a Bongathon.

    Works for me.

    /toke

  8. 8.

    skippy

    rip billy powell, keyboardist for lynyrd skynyrd. no matter what you think of their music, you gotta luv freebird, and 56 is far too young to die (at least, in my 55 year old’s mind it is).

  10. 10.

    Max B.

    i second amorphus on both counts. the suckiness of your taste in music is only exceeded by your lack of sufficient testicular fortitude to post pantera 10 straight.

  11. 11.

    John Cole

    John, have you considered a “curmudgeon” blog label?

    LMAO. The original name of this blog was the “Curmudgeon’s Corner,” and the first url was http://grump.blogspot.com.

    Hell, from the third post ever in the archives:

    In fact, I think this stream of consciousness description has helped me to come up with the full title for the the corner. “The Curmudgeon’s Corner- Helping People Make fools of Themselves.”

    I was the Corner before the Corner was the Corner. And I was just as wingnutty.

    Damnit. I see I missed my blogiversary again this year. You would think I would remember since it is on January 2nd.

  13. 13.

    Laura W

    @John Cole: See, I knew that from archive dumpster diving. I commemorated the forever naming of the BJ blog in a comment in early January, missing the exact date by two days as I recall.
    Bu Whatever.
    (I especially liked you thanking your two readers, Mom and Dad.)

    While you’re here, John…
    (of jail free card,” bu whatever.)

  14. 14.

    Alan

    I guess I have a very lame taste in music. I like 4 non blondes’ "What’s Up" and Creed’s "Higher".

  15. 15.

    Conservatively Liberal

    Neil Diamond? Just don’t play Holly Holy, ok? Really, that would just be too much for me to deal with. Don’t do it. Oh the horror!

    Actually, I like Neil Diamond quite a bit. Now if you wanted to issue a musical fatwa that makes people quake in terror, try Tom Jones or Don Ho.

  16. 16.

    Evil Bender

    Wow. Bad enough you’ve made me think about Creed–threatening Neil Diamond is just plain evil!

    Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to play AC/DC on Rockband.

  17. 17.

    Joe Lisboa

    Wait, what? You were dissing SDRE?! Now I’ve got even more to cry about. In the dark. Wearing all black. Making mix tapes for girls that don’t even exist. *sob*

  18. 18.

    Ash Can

    Music, like humor and beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. Having said that, lynrd skynrd sucks.

    But our curmudgeonly host has declared this a cocktail thread, so I will report that I had a lovely martini (or whatever you purists prefer to call it) made with Tito’s vodka (nice, but it doesn’t blow my other favorite vodkas away) and garlic-stuffed olives while I was making supper. Now the dishes are in the dishwasher and I’m relaxing with Miller High Life.

  19. 19.

    Mr. Poppinfresh

    Man, that Soundgarden video gives me goosebumps, remembering back when rock didn’t suck the big one. Turning on commercial rock radio these days is a recipe for heartache, with the amount of generic crap that all sounds the same being pumped out of bands with no souls.

    Hell, Soundgarden wasn’t even my favorite- I was an Alice In Chains/Nirvana man, though I still preferred Cornell to Pearl Jam any day of the week. Still, I’d trade Eddie Cheddar for those rejects in Puddle of Staind or whatever the fuck they call themselves any day of the week.

    Christ, I hate getting old.

  20. 20.

    Mr. Poppinfresh

    P.S., I’m hitting the rye pretty hard tonight. It’s been an awful week to be a lobbyist in Canada, too much nerve-wracking shit to cope with sans self-medicating.

  24. 24.

    Incertus

    4 Non Blondes did a decent cover of Misty Mountain Hop, as I recall. And is there any way to do ten consecutive Pantera posts without repeating a couple of songs?

    I’ll be over here in the corner listening to the Mendoza Line.

  28. 28.

    John Cole

    @Mr. Poppinfresh: Every time I see the word champagne, you know what pops into my head?

    Christoper Walken as the Continental.

    Is there enough evidence on this blog for me to be committed, or do I have a couple of years of blogging left in me?

  29. 29.

    Laura W

    @Ash Can: What are your favorite vodkas? I got into vodka late last spring for the first time in my life (because it’s TOO DAMN HOT HERE TO DRINK WINE) and I tried at least 6 till I pledged my devotion to Ketel One Citroen. I even relented and tried Tito’s after the badgering I took. Meh.

    I’ve been on the wagon this year (with one teeny tiny dive off on Nov 20), so I really have nothing else to contribute. But would like the benefit of your research.

  30. 30.

    Mr. Poppinfresh

    @John Cole: I had the weird sorta-privelage to see Jerry Cantrell play a show in Vancouver the day after Staley died, and it was pretty raw stuff- an amazing experience. That vanguard of early 90’s bands from Seattle (grunge) and L.A. (Tool, Rage Against the Machine, etc) were a pretty hard act to follow, so it’s no surprised their descendants chose instead to suck mightily as a way of distinguishing themselves.

  32. 32.

    Mr. Poppinfresh

    Also, I don’t think this blog will result in your getting committed, since I see BJ as a kind of group therapy session, which QED protects you and the rest of us by way of medically privelaged information.

    Or so I hope. Like I said, there is a lot of rye involved here.

  34. 34.

    John Cole

    BTW- Alice in Chains-Dirt, Little Feat-Waiting For Columbus, and the Allman Brothers at Ludlow Garage are the best albums to listen to when driving long distances. Just push your foot down and put the sunglasses on and you are an hour closer to your destination.

    Like that.

  36. 36.

    Bell Curve

    Am I the only one who thinks Creed’s "Higher" might actually be about marijuana? If any other rock band released a song with that title we’d assume it’s about drugs. Why not this one? I mean, have you read the lyrics?

    When dreaming I’m guided through another world
    Time and time again
    At sunrise I fight to stay asleep
    ‘Cause I don’t want to leave the comfort of this place
    ‘Cause there’s a hunger, a longing to escape
    From the life I live when I’m awake

    Dude who doesn’t want to get out of bed, wants to escape reality? And the giveaway line of course is this one:

    Can you take me higher?
    To the place where blind men see

    Clearly a glaucoma reference.

    Why have I never seen this theory posited?

  37. 37.

    Mr. Poppinfresh

    @John Cole: He didn’t even go there, not surprisingly.

    Alright, that’s enough blog spamming for one night. Time to retire this poor bottle of Crown Royal and hit the hays.

  38. 38.

    Ash Can

    @John Cole: LOL! Maybe my taste buds have been cauterized by too much Indian and Thai food over the years, but there are a few cheap-ass beers I like to have once in a while. Old Style, Special Export, and PBR are the others. They’re best served ice cold and with a ball park or Wisconsin wrapped around them, though.

  41. 41.

    AhabTRuler

    John, I assume that you didn’t get into RATM, like, yesterday, so answer me this….did you not pay attention to the uber-leftist lyrics, or what?

    I mean, I thought that Zach de la Roche was part of the Free Mumia Fringe.

  42. 42.

    John Cole

    @AhabTRuler: Dude. I toured with the Dead. What can I say? I am a strange ranger.

    Although I will say this- limited government conservatism is really not that at odds with much of what you all believe in. What Obama did the other day, allowing the EPA to make a decision regarding states setting their own pollution laws- that is what I consider.. federalism. Just because the Republicans have screwed everything up does not mean that conservatism (or what used to be conservatism) is completely without merit.

  43. 43.

    Ash Can

    @Laura W: I’m partial to Ketel One and Grey Goose, and I also like Finlandia, Absolut, and Skyy. I prefer non-flavored, since I use them for plain martinis, although the good brands make decent flavored ones, like your favorite. Ketel One Citroen would make a kick-ass lemon drop or cosmo, I’m sure.

  45. 45.

    randiego

    Nice! Chris Cornell, Rage and Alice… well done!
    .
    I’m happy to report to you that I caught both Chris Cornell AND Tom Morello in San Diego in 2008. San Diego now has several smaller intimate music venues to catch acts like this…
    .
    Oh yeah and it was 75 here today.

  49. 49.

    Josh Hueco

    You can never go wrong with Manhattans…made with rye, dammit. That reminds me, I need to order a bottle of Templeton Rye, one of the best things to come from Iowa—after Donna Reed and Captain Kirk of course.

  51. 51.

    p.a.

    Grey Goose is nice, but I prefer those actually distilled from potatoes; Chopin and another Polish vodka with an unpronounceable name I can’t remember- begins with K but sounds like sh.

    Also, I’m not stiff-necked about most things but a martini is gin, vermouth and olives (maybe pearl onions). NOT VODKA.

  53. 53.

    Conservatively Liberal

    Teh BJ Mod Gawd is upset at my musical selection! Musical Censorship! Oppression! I demand justice!

    Please? ;)

  54. 54.

    Tattoosydney

    @John Cole:

    Ah, Cypress Hill… one of my oddest memories is going to a dance party where (for some unknown and decidedly strange reason) Cypress Hill were also playing. At set time, all of the little rave boys and girls disappeared off the dance floor, to be replaced by about a thousand people all carrying bongs (which they had somehow managed to smuggle past six police sniffer dogs). Within (quite literally) a minute, there was a smoke haze so thick that visibility was about two feet… We spent the entire set outside, but occasionally walked in, took a deep breath, and wandered back outside feeling very happy.

    @Laura W:

    I had thought that 42below was almost unbeatable. Their plain vodka is lovely, as is their passionfruit.

    Howewer, I recently discovered this distillery which is just near where I grew up, and which makes a vodka flavoured with Australian native finger limes. Heaven.

  55. 55.

    cleek

    FYI…. i’m running a Name That Tune contest over at my place… if anyone thinks they’re any good at that kind of thing.

  57. 57.

    lost in GA

    hey John. One of the great Elastica lyrics is "I work hard but I’m lazy" which I guess is conventional wisdom, but none the less . . . oh, and Big Dumb Sex is quintessential Cornell.

  58. 58.

    stickler

    Holy crap! Someone on this verteufelten website has a clue:

    Also, I’m not stiff-necked about most things but a martini is gin, vermouth and olives (maybe pearl onions). NOT VODKA.

    Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. Martini = Gin. All else = crap in a martini glass. Oh, and with onions = Gibson.

    Although, regarding vodka, you people ought to be on the lookout for Monopolowa (from Vienna, Austria, of all places). Here in Oregon it’s surprisingly cheap ($14).

    And if you’re under the impression that you’re "enjoying yourself" while drinking Miller Lite … well, there’s not a lot we can do to help. Seek lupulin at your nearest convenience. Take daily.

  59. 59.

    The Other Steve

    Also, I’m not stiff-necked about most things but a martini is gin, vermouth and olives (maybe pearl onions). NOT VODKA.

    Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. Martini = Gin. All else = crap in a martini glass. Oh, and with onions = Gibson.

    Perhaps, but a proper vodka martini tastes a thousand times better.

    And for that, you must visit Moscow on the Hill in St. Paul, MN.

  60. 60.

    Cain

    I will wait for the Opeth, Porcupine Tree, Black Sabbath, Train set. :) I would have mentioned dream theater, but I’m not in the mood for them. Besides, the whiny bastards refuse to show up in the northwest, because they aren’t popular enough. Motherfuckers.

    cain

  61. 61.

    Ash Can

    @p.a.: How could I forget the potato vodkas? I don’t know if this is the one you’re thinking of, but Luksusowa straight out of the freezer is unsurpassed.

    Oh, and stickler, it’s High Life, not Lite. There IS a difference.

  63. 63.

    Conservatively Liberal

    @wag:

    Great jamming but too sedate for me…lol! There is some great improv playing there to listen to though. As a guitarist I appreciate all styles of playing, except country. A person has to draw the line somewhere.

    I think Pachelbel would be impressed with how far his one song has been taken. Three hundred years and still being played.

    How about some British ‘Action’?

    How about some Philadelphia rock?

    Excellent Zep cover by GW

    Some rockin SOS by MC

    Anyone want to ‘Dance’?

    Rock on!

  64. 64.

    Conservatively Liberal

    Damn! I thought I only had four links in that post but the preview hid one! Thanks for saving the last post John, could you do it one more time?

    I will keep the max links to four in the future. Grrrr. ;)

  68. 68.

    Jess

    Cypress Hill? Soundgarden? Elastica? John, I’m amazed how closely your eclectic tastes match mine. Lemme check out the range on this thing: Birthday Party? Mano Negra? PJ Harvey? White Zombie? JJ Cale? Or are we getting too art school now?

  69. 69.

    Zuzu's Petals

    Okay, not a music link, but worth a read, and worth cutting and pasting on wingnut message boards everywhere.

    Bertha Lewis, CEO of ACORN, responds to the wingnut lies in this HuffPo piece:

    So let’s be clear. ACORN isn’t getting any of this money. Since it is set aside for non-profit housing developers to help purchase, rehab, and resell foreclosed properties, we aren’t eligible for it in the first place.

  70. 70.

    Lucky Red

    I LOVE your taste in music! And yes, I too remember catching Rusted Root when they were playing street gigs and abandoned buildings…

  71. 71.

    JGabriel

    John Cole @ Top:

    I am antisocial and the only reason I went out for dinner was because I didn’t want to cook, and not because I had some great urge to deal with idiots who got housed at Happy Hour, I sneaked up to the minibar with my dinner to watch the news alone…

    Damn. That sounds just like someone I see in the mirror every day.

    .

  73. 73.

    Martin

    John, this 40-something approves of your music taste.

    Perhaps, but a proper vodka martini tastes a thousand times better.

    There is no better than good gin. Sorry. Gin reminds me of camping and camping means I’m not at or going to work, and that there is nothing that can bring me down.

  74. 74.

    Polish the Guillotines

    Four Non Blondes

    I was in a band that rehearsed in the space next to them right before they "hit it big". They were nice enough, but I just never could figure out what they had going for them other than being an all-female band during The Year Of the Woman(tm).

    One hit wonders, ultimately. But that’s more than I can claim. I hated that song, even before it infected the airwaves.

  76. 76.

    TheAssInTheHatOnMyCat(Formerly Comrade Tax Analyst)

    When I was about 25(1975), my brother and I saw a display set-up in the local supermarket of "Count Vasya" Vodka – it was the first time we ever saw hard liquor sold in PLASTIC bottles. We bought this huge thing (I think it was something near to a half-gallon) for about $3. But we didn’t drink it…you see, the very next day was the birthday of the guy who wrote out customer tickets at our family business (a car wash), he was a really nice guy named Gary, who had at one time been Lenny Bruce’s drummer (rim shots and probably not much else). Unfortunately for Gary, he got caught up in the full-fledged efforts of folks in authority to mess with Lenny Bruce, and so the kid got popped with some marijuana in Nevada. This was in the 50’s, mind you, so he did 6 years at Carson City penitentiary. It didn’t do him much good. Anyway, here he was in 1975, writing tickets and pumping gas as he turned 40. Since we knew his favorite vices were cheap vodka & mini-whites, and we weren’t about to give him any speed, we gave him the cheap Vodka.

    Yes, it was probably wrong, but he sincerely thanked us for it.

  77. 77.

    srv

    My ears are still ringing from the Combichrist concert Sunday night. It was nice not to be the oldest guy there, but it was awkward when I was the only one to recognize the Charlie the Unicorn intro.

    Leather is so much more expensive looking now, and these girls bathe unlike the punkers of my day…

  78. 78.

    Johnny Pez

    Damnit. I see I missed my blogiversary again this year. You would think I would remember since it is on January 2nd.

    Your problem is your blogiversary is on Isaac Asimov’s birthday. The Asimov Field causes all other events that occur on January 2nd to fade into the background.

    What you need to do is ask your household robot to remind you every year.

  79. 79.

    Beej

    You don’t know from great. Back in my day there was the greatest American rock band evah! CCR baby, Credence Clearwater Revival. Amazing how those city boys learned all about the delta blues. You kids just don’t know. Now, get off my lawn!

  83. 83.

    Thlayli

    First Elastica album: TEH AWESOME.

    Second Elastica album: not so much.

    Drugs are bad, n’kay?

  84. 84.

    Chuck Butcher

    I suppose this explains why most of the music I own and music channels are tuned to the Blues. 20+ yrs of sobriety make commenting on good alcohol a bit difficult.

  85. 85.

    Reverend Dennis

    John Martyn passed away Thursday.

    May You Never

    Martyn was one of the many damned good musicians who, when you played his stuff for someone, always evoked the question "Why haven’t I heard of him before?"

    RIP, John.

  87. 87.

    Xanthippas

    Upon reflection, the music in this thread really isn’t appropriate for “cocktail hour,” and probably better suited for “I’m 21, I have a handle full of Maker’s Mark, a pocket full of cash, and a get out of jail free card,” but whatever.

    OMG…that’s hilarious. Mr. Cole, that sort of deep reflection is why I keep coming back to this blog.

    Anyway every now and then I forget how much I hate Creed, so thanks for that. There is something cosmic about a band producing, for their most famous song ever, a video that encapsulates their assitude and tool-ishness. Really, everything that is horrible about that band is in that video, and they were proud of it.

  88. 88.

    Krista

    John, with your musical tastes and comfortable grumpiness, I would swear that you and my husband were separated at birth. We actually went to see Down at the Roseland in NYC on our honeymoon, for goodness’ sake.

    And yes, it was an absolutely awesome show. You would have loved it.

  89. 89.

    The Mantis

    Pan-ter-a! Pan-ter-a! I actually saw Cypress Hill and Rage on tour together. This is my dream post! All you need now is some Minor Threat/Fugazi and I am right back in high school (with a handle of Makers Mark, a pocket full of ice cream truck profits, and a spend the night in jail card!)

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