Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

When do the post office & the dmv weigh in on the wuhan virus?

Putin dreamed of ending NATO, and now it’s Finnish-ed.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

The revolution will be supervised.

Tick tock motherfuckers!

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

I’m pretty sure there’s only one Jack Smith.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

Republicans can’t even be trusted with their own money.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I was promised a recession.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

Don’t expect peaches from an apple tree.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

Peak wingnut was a lie.

“I never thought they’d lock HIM up,” sobbed a distraught member of the Lock Her Up Party.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Something needs to be done about our bogus SCOTUS.

Spilling the end game before they can coat it in frankl luntz-approved dogwhistles.

We still have time to mess this up!

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You are here: Home / Pet Blogging / Cat Blogging / Kitty Lobster

Kitty Lobster

by | 34 Comments

This post is in: 

A reader just sent this in:

That cat has no dignity whatsoever.

Again, the quickest way to get your pet up here is to have it in a compromising position. Like, for example, a cat wearing a lobster costume.

*** Update ***

I have no idea how I missed this until now:

Excellent.

Reader Interactions

34Comments

  2. 2.

    gbear

    Again, the quickest way to get your pet up here is to have it in a compromising position.

    Tried that. Didn’t work. John hates my cats. Hater.

    I will admit that my cat merely got caught looking stupid when I clicked the shutter. I did not go out of my way to make her look as humiliated as the cat above. Poor kitty.

    "Wen I haz vishun bak, u r so ded"

  4. 4.

    Calming Influence

    I think he’s a very smart cat who’s wearing the lobster outfit to sneak up on fish.

  7. 7.

    Comrade Stuck

    I’m skeert of cats in Lobster disguise. You think it’s somethin’ good to et and let your guard down, then you get et instead.

  8. 8.

    Comrade Darkness

    …is to have it in a compromising position.

    Clearly, you have power issues with pets.

    But it’s cute on you.

  10. 10.

    kommrade reproductive vigor

    Again, the quickest way to get your pet up here is to have it in a compromising position.

    When you have to carve out your eyes because MyiPoo4u sent you pictures of his goats in compromising positions, you’ll have no one to blame but yourself.

  11. 11.

    Lavocat

    Tuna is like kitty cocaine?

    Then catnip must be kitty acid. Ever see a cat on catnip? Mighty fuckin’ weird, man!

    The marathon lounge training cracked me up – along with the "cat yodeling".

    Thanks for the belly laugh!

  13. 13.

    J.

    That video is HYSTERICAL. OMG. Thanks for sharing.

    And speaking of lint rolling, cats, and you wonder why cats hate us, check out this instructional video on how to lint roll a cat. (Contrary to the footage, Flora loves being lint rolled, as does her brother, Felix.)

    As to the poor feline forced to wear the lobster costume, I doubt the poor thing had much choice — or was drugged.

  15. 15.

    Joshua Norton

    Too bad my cats are not very vocal or I’d give it a try.

    Try "kitty accordion" doing Lady of Spain. They get very vocal. And so do you.

  16. 16.

    new day rising

    "Again, the quickest way to get your pet up here is to have it in a compromising position."

    Sounds like a challenge. I’ll see what I can do. Maybe a picture of "Finnegan" drinking out of a (flushed) toilet, his favorite pastime, should do it.

  20. 20.

    PaminBB

    Excellent video. I will have our three cats watch it and learn.

    BTW, thanks for the furminator tip, John. It really does seem to help on our largest furball.

  21. 21.

    Jager

    When I met Mrs Jager 11 years ago, I was introduced to her Persian Cat. Being a dog guy, I was disgusted by the way she babied her cat. The kitty-kon artist is now 20 years old and "Mommy" carries her up the stairs, cuts her food into tiny pieces and constantly reminds me that she is "getting old" .(the cat, not Mrs Jager) When I’m alone with the cat she acts like a kitten, bounding up the stairs, jumping on the beds exhibiting impressive speed, power and agility. The other day after being verbal slapped down after I called the cat out for the millionth time. I placed a chunk of chicken on the counter…the cat, now given a choice of continuing her ‘old, crippled cat" act or eating a succulent piece of roast chicken did a vertical leap onto the counter and snatched the chicken right from under Mommy’s eyes…game over!

  22. 22.

    Thoughtcrime

    Wow, that was fast. Thanks, John. I didn’t expect my cat’s picture would get posted, especially this quickly. Even got his own diary and a snarky comment from you. He’s honored.

    For anyone that’s interested, the kitty lobster’s name is Gizmo. I caught him and his brother Stripe when they were feral kittens living underneath our porch. While he may not have much dignity, he’s the smartest cat I’ve ever owned. Too smart, and too much the acrobat, as he’s always causing trouble. For example, he once clawed his way across our new 100" home theater screen, chasing a moth. Over the phone it sounded like my wife was getting murdered when she screamed in shock at him. Fun stuff.

  23. 23.

    D-Chance.

    Well, all it took was a little public bitching to get a Cole flood.

    Excellent.

    BTW, a candidate for the blogroll… LeanLeft. Excellent double-bill takedown of the homeless w/cellphone outrage.

  24. 24.

    vacuumslayer

    @Thoughtcrime:

    For anyone that’s interested, the kitty lobster’s name is Gizmo. I caught him and his brother Stripe when they were feral kittens living underneath our porch. While he may not have much dignity, he’s the smartest cat I’ve ever owned.

    Sounds like my Pippi, who was also feral and hanging out in our back yard. She’s a stripey ginger.

  26. 26.

    Jager

    Mrs Jager’s Persian, in addition to being an actress is a serial German Shepard tormentor. The dog usually ignores her and it drives "Mommy’s baby" crazy. She’ll jump at him, hiss, poke him in the nose and finally he’ll react. Of course, Mrs Jager has a shit fit and accuses the dog of "going after" the cat. The cat never does anything when Mommy is around, she just begs to be picked up, given a treat and sits in Mommy’s lap and purrs. Mrs J has read both these posts, so she is pissed at me. Now she and the cat are taking a nap…I’m going to the park with the dog, we have wounds to lick! I think I have issues in my marriage!

  31. 31.

    Thoughtcrime

    @scruncher:

    The names are a reference to "Gremlins". As feral kittens, they reminded me of the two mogwai from the movie. They have identical tabby coloring with a pronounced black stripe down their head and back, and they made a funny bird-like cooing meow when they were first brought into our house. The funny thing is that I wound up getting their names backwards, as Gizmo has turned out to be the devious and destructive one who always begs for food, while Stripe is the timid, gentler one.

  32. 32.

    Comrade Kevin

    That cat has no dignity whatsoever is plotting its revenge.

    I think that’s more accurate.

  34. 34.

    Jackie

    scruncher:

    17 yrs ago we lived in a neighborhood of cats mostly fathered by a black and white tuxedo cat. First Daddy my 12 yr old daughter dubbed Romeo. And then his son showed up serenading and he was dubbed Romeo Jr. My 13 3/4th yr old cat Oreo is son of Jr. He’s a bit slow, but we love him.
    Romeo: What a great name for an un-neutered Tom ;)

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