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You are here: Home / Politics / Pigs (Three Different Ones)

Pigs (Three Different Ones)

by John Cole|  April 9, 20096:51 pm| 73 Comments

This post is in: Politics, Republican Stupidity, Assholes

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1.) Karl Rove, explaining to us that because the GOP is filled with unhinged dead-enders who make up a small minority of the general population, Barack Obama is therefore divisive despite having personal approval ratings that Bush would have killed for.

2.) Rick Santorum, explaining to us that the President of the United States of America hates America. Obligatory Dan Savage link (explanation here).

3.) Robert Peters, trying to “connect the dots” between mass murder and gay marriage (hint- there isn’t one).

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Previous Post: « Fortunate one
Next Post: Smackdown on Hardball »

Reader Interactions

73Comments

  1. 1.

    asiangrrlMN

    April 9, 2009 at 6:55 pm

    I still don’t understand why any airtime/space is given to these guys. I am not asking for total accuracy or even complete coherence, but a shred of truth would be nice–just one. I especially don’t understand how anyone who was part of the debacle of the last eight years can be considered an expert on anything. Karl Rove? Seriously?

    P.S. Don’t call them dogs. They are worms. (I like dogs and don’t like worms).

  2. 2.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 6:58 pm

    Shouldn’t that be, er, Pigs (Three Different Ones)?
    Followed by Dogs?

    Oh, and, Ha Ha! Charade you are!

  3. 3.

    Tim on Wisconsin

    April 9, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    Nice semi-obscure Floyd reference, that.

  4. 4.

    Ash

    April 9, 2009 at 7:00 pm

    WHAT ABOUT THE FIRST PUPPY DAMMIT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

  5. 5.

    Tom Hilton

    April 9, 2009 at 7:01 pm

    So when Rick Santorum engages in Santorum-on-dog sex, it isn’t actually bestiality?

  6. 6.

    John Cole

    April 9, 2009 at 7:02 pm

    @AhabTSp’nker: Doh. Brain cramp.

  7. 7.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    April 9, 2009 at 7:03 pm

    Dammit, I thought this was gonna be a pet thread with pig pictures.

  8. 8.

    Dennis-SGMM

    April 9, 2009 at 7:04 pm

    Isn’t giving those three airtime sort of like giving Joseph Hazelwood (Captain of the Exxon Valdez) airtime to talk about seamanship? It’s fucking amazing to me that the media became so accustomed to swallowing shit over the past eight years that they’ve come to like the taste of it.

  9. 9.

    JL

    April 9, 2009 at 7:04 pm

    @asiangrrlMN: You are definitely correct. I was lurking down be below and noticed that their was a post about three dogs. You can imagine my excitement since John has been lacking in posting dog pics. Instead there is a post that can only be read with a stiff drink in hand.

    THANKS JOHN for changing the heading

  10. 10.

    Paddy

    April 9, 2009 at 7:05 pm

    Do. Not. Miss. VIDEO- Pat Buchanan v. Larry O’Donnell on the Notre Dame/Obama Broohaha- FIREWORKS! BTW, O’Donnell won.

    I live outside South Bend, and this crap is all over the paper, local news etc. Randall Terry of all people has even opened an office here to organize the protest.

  11. 11.

    Jamie

    April 9, 2009 at 7:06 pm

    Shouldn’t that be Dan Savage, from The Stranger?

  12. 12.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 7:09 pm

    Sounds like we have some candidates for the reëducation (tee-hee) camps for some remedial Pink Floyd Studies. And patchouli. Lots and lots of Patchouli. Mwah-ha-ha-ha! ! ! ! 1!

  13. 13.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 7:10 pm

    @John Cole: Just remember this, Cole: The Final Cut is an album to far!

  14. 14.

    asiangrrlMN

    April 9, 2009 at 7:10 pm

    @JL: That John Cole is such a tease, isn’t he? I collect pigs, so now I am doubly-miffed. These three guys are worms in my head.

    Ok. I’m over it.

  15. 15.

    grape_crush

    April 9, 2009 at 7:13 pm

    Piggy Number Four – Rick Warren, apparently forgot one of the Commandments.

  16. 16.

    Jrod

    April 9, 2009 at 7:18 pm

    From Ricky’s spew:

    Koh’s "transnationalism" stands in contrast to good, old-fashioned notions of national sovereignty, in which our Constitution is the highest law of the land. In the traditional view, controversial matters, whatever they may be, are subject to democratic debate here. They should be resolved by the American people and their representatives, not "internationalized." What Holland or Belgium or Kenya or any other nation or coalition of nations thinks has no bearing on our exercise of executive, legislative, or judicial power.

    This, of course, only applies to law. When it comes to monetary policy, well, it’s best to just leave that in the hands of a few shady and secretive international banks and organizations… as long as Ricky gets his cut! Santorum for Prez!

  17. 17.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 7:21 pm

    @Paddy: That’s an awesome clip. Buchanan floundered; he just looked like a tired, old ideologue.

  18. 18.

    asiangrrlMN

    April 9, 2009 at 7:23 pm

    @Paddy:

    Wow. I didn’t know Lawrence had it in him. That was brilliant. I only wish he would have brought up the fact that innocent people HAVE been killed in Texas by the government and that the death penalty, as applied, is very unfair.

    Other than that, Lawrence OWNED Pat. I have never seen Lawrence get so worked up. It must be because Lawrence is sick of having his religion co-opted by morons like Pat.

    Jrod, ha! That’s also known as throwing a bunch of words out there and hoping they make sense. Please.

  19. 19.

    cyntax

    April 9, 2009 at 7:26 pm

    Robert Peters, trying to “connect the dots” between mass murder and gay marriage (hint- there isn’t one).

    Well, see that’s the mark of a real pro: go for the points based on difficulty.

    Whereas calling Glenn Beck to account, that’s just too obvious.

  20. 20.

    Lev

    April 9, 2009 at 7:28 pm

    I confess I don’t know much about international law, but how much authority does the UN really have to force countries to do their bidding (such as it is)? I was under the impression that they don’t have much, and that when they do binding things they try to do it with treaties, like the Law Of The Sea treaty. I don’t see how the elected representatives of the United States of America ratifying a treaty is in any way undemocratic if we happen to be doing it with other countries.

    All the conservative "internationism" nonsense is coming about as a result of the decline of American influence and power. It seems like the right is really frightened at the possibility of America not being able to bomb any nation into submission, while the left seems unconcerned with either American imperial decline (which is fine) and with trying to wind down our empire (which we should get on doing). I wrote as much on my blog today, if you’re interested.

    P.S. I don’t understand, you have a Republican Stupidity tag? Doesn’t that cover, like, every post here? Might as well call the blog that.

  21. 21.

    Zifnab

    April 9, 2009 at 7:29 pm

    Koh’s "transnationalism" stands in contrast to good, old-fashioned notions of national sovereignty, in which our Constitution is the highest law of the land.

    Oh Rick Warren. You’re such a constitutional scholar. I was thoroughly convinced that international treaties as ratified by the Senate and signed by the President were binding laws of the land as stated within the Constitution. And yet, your wisdom serves as a bag of truth, bludgeoning my tiny head in with its magnificence and glory.

    Thank you Rick Warren. Oh thank you.

  22. 22.

    MikeJ

    April 9, 2009 at 7:29 pm

    Ash, rumor yesterday was that Teddy was coming down to DC with easter bunny presents, including his favorite breed of dog. There wasn’t anything to back this up, but WaPo ran the rumor anyway,

  23. 23.

    Mission To Marzipan

    April 9, 2009 at 7:29 pm

    Piggy #5 – ME. (See how I made that totally on topic?)
    Also procured at Food Lion today:
    Mission to Marzipan
    Triple Caramel Chunk

    I shall not rest, however, until I have located Orange & Cream and Coconut Seven Layer Bar.
    And apparently, until I regain all the pounds I lost in the first quarter of 09. Where are my kangoo jumps? Tomorrow, I swear it.

  24. 24.

    Calouste

    April 9, 2009 at 7:30 pm

    @Jrod:

    in which our Constitution is the highest law of the land.

    And what does the highest law in the land say about treaties? Let’s have a look at article six:

    This Constitution, and the Laws of the United States which shall be made in Pursuance thereof; and all Treaties made, or which shall be made, under the Authority of the United States, shall be the supreme Law of the Land

    Usual wingnut fail.

    I am no Constitutional scholar, but it seems to me that the Founding Fathers gave international treaties to same value as US law.

  25. 25.

    kay

    April 9, 2009 at 7:31 pm

    Karl Rove sees what he wants to see.

    Former President Bush enjoyed more support from Democrats in early 2001 than President Obama enjoys from Republicans in 2009.

    Even after a "bitterly contested election".

    Karl Rove thinks that proves that Obama is polarizing.

    I think it’s just as likely to "prove" that Republicans are more rabidly partisan than Democrats.

  26. 26.

    MikeJ

    April 9, 2009 at 7:32 pm

    Ahab, thanks for heeding my call for liberal, elitist diaereses.

  27. 27.

    Paddy

    April 9, 2009 at 7:33 pm

    AhabTSp’nker@17 & asiangrrlMN@18

    I KNOW!! Wasn’t there a mildly retarded young man that was one of the last ones that Bush condemned? And the woman that he was so crude about? Makes me sigh. It’s only going to get worse here, esp with Terry whipping up the crazies. And O’Donnell did very good.

  28. 28.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 7:33 pm

    how much authority does the UN really have to force countries to do their bidding (such as it is)?

    It is more a question of enforcement. IIRC, the UN can pass unbinding resolutions in the Gen Assembly, but binding resolutions have to pass the Security Council with the dreaded Permanent Member Veto. Then, if you are willing to institute sanctions, block international access, or go to war with the UN’s blessing (if you can swing it), you can very messily enforce the edicts. Sort of.

    The first time the UN endorsed a war was Korea; the second was the Persian Gulf War. Things have gone downhill from there.
    Otherwise, the UN is reduced to asking nicely and motivated public and international opinion.

  29. 29.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    April 9, 2009 at 7:34 pm

    @Mission To Marzipan: Did you try the kangaroos yet? What did you think?

  30. 30.

    Calouste

    April 9, 2009 at 7:36 pm

    @grape_crush:

    Piggy Number Four – Rick Warren, apparently forgot one of the Commandments.

    Nah, the Commandment is "you shall not bear false witness against your neighbor". Now I assume that Rick lives far enough away from all the proles and that his estate is so large that practically speaking he doesn’t have any neighbors, so he can say whatever the heck he wants.

  31. 31.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 7:37 pm

    @MikeJ: This country needs a revolutionary platform that includes the use of diacritical markings, where appropriate!

  32. 32.

    Library Grape

    April 9, 2009 at 7:38 pm

    oh man, I am about to have stomach pains from all the laughing at this. did you guys see the results of the new rasmussen poll on socialism? http://www.librarygrape.com/2009/04/cries-of-socialism-by-gop-make.html

    it appears that the republicans’ efforts to slander obama with cries of socialism! at every turn have resulted in… wait for it… Americans viewing socialism more favorably!

    HAHAHAHAHAHA! Is there anything these GOP f**ktards can’t screw up?

  33. 33.

    Dexter Morgan

    April 9, 2009 at 7:38 pm

    1.) Karl Rove, explaining to us that because the GOP is filled with unhinged dead-enders who make up a small minority of the general population, Barack Obama is therefore divisive despite having personal approval ratings that Bush would have killed for.

    Sad thing is, Bush did kill for them.

  34. 34.

    Mission To Marzipan

    April 9, 2009 at 7:39 pm

    @Just Some Fuckhead: No, on accounta I was purging the day they came (you can see that in yer mind’s eye without further elaboration, I trust?) and then I was dizzy silly on good drugs yesterday and today I’m still spacey and a bit silly. And essentially lazy.
    Ask me again tomorrow night. Hold me accountable, damn it.

  35. 35.

    Library Grape

    April 9, 2009 at 7:41 pm

    As to the Robert Peters "Gays cause CANCER too!! OMG" nonsense, it really is quite amazing how much power The Gays have to bring society to its knees (heh).

    We’ve now been found out as being responsible for a wave of mass murders. Jerry Falwell revealed that we were the ones behind 9/11. Most recently, Pat Robertson gave up our secret when he disclosed that The Gays (especially Ellen Degeneres) were responsible for bringing forth God’s Wrath upon News Orleans in the form of Hurricane Katrina.

    Can one of my Gay comrades-in-arms out there with a background in science please do some tests and distill out the omnipotent essence that resides within us that allows us to perform such tremendous feats? +5 Elixir of Omnipotent Gayness FTW!

    I’d really like to use it to, say, learn a dozen languages, win the lottery and convert Colin Farrell to our side of the fence. We can’t waste such unbridled power on silly things like mass murders, terrorist attacks and annoying wind storms. Poppa needs a new pair of Prada sneakers!

  36. 36.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 7:41 pm

    @Dexter Morgan: Sad thing is, Bush did kill for them.

    To be perfectly precise, he initially only capitalized on the killings of others for those numbers. Later he expanded into the killing for those numbers business, outdoing the original offenders by at least two orders of magnitude.

  37. 37.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    April 9, 2009 at 7:41 pm

    Watching the Buchanan-O’Donnell throwdown now, totally not liking the strident angry O’Donnell.

  38. 38.

    LD50

    April 9, 2009 at 7:42 pm

    This country needs a revolutionary platform that includes the use of diacritical markings, where appropriate!

    And Mötörhead and Amon Düül would play at all formal State functions.

  39. 39.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    April 9, 2009 at 7:43 pm

    @Mission To Marzipan: Why are you waiting until tomorrow?

  40. 40.

    demkat620

    April 9, 2009 at 7:43 pm

    @Paddy: I loved it. Pat still thinks the. louder. he. says. it. means. the. more. right. he. is.

    Lawrence O’Donnell, ftw.

  41. 41.

    Dexter Morgan

    April 9, 2009 at 7:47 pm

    @AhabTSp’nker: Indeed.

  42. 42.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 7:48 pm

    @Just Some Fuckhead: totally not liking the strident angry O’Donnell.

    That’s funny coming from a fuckhead. But seriously, its not about liking the dude, it is about acknowledging that he was right, and that Patty B. was trying to weasel out of distorting established Catholic doctrine and questioning the decisions of two Popes. Now, I don’t know if the prohibition on the Death Penalty was issued ex cathedra or not, but a good Catholic would not be doing such things, much less on the TeeVee(TM).

  43. 43.

    MikeJ

    April 9, 2009 at 7:49 pm

    Re Pat: Didja notice that when Pat started talking at the beginning he immediately went into full filibuster mode? He talked and talked and talked, and would have never stopped had O’Donnell not jumped in. And still he didn’t want O’Donnell to get a full sentence out.

    LD50, wikipedia has articles explaining the difference between heavy metal umlauts and diaereses.

  44. 44.

    asiangrrlMN

    April 9, 2009 at 7:52 pm

    @Just Some Fuckhead: I actually liked that he got heated because he’s too cool on Olbermann and Rachel for me. Yeah, I know it gave Pat the opportunity to call him shrill or whatever, but I’m glad someone stuck it to Pat. I am so sick of him, and it proves that Dems are not wimps all the time.

    @Paddy: When Pat said that an innocent is never murdered on death row, I almost lost it. I will never understand the appeal of Buchanan. Never.

    @Library Grape: What, you didn’t get the memo? I’m bi, and let me tell you, if they’re worried about teh gays, wait until they see what teh bisexuals can do! Mwahahahahahaha!

  45. 45.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    April 9, 2009 at 7:52 pm

    @AhabTSp’nker:

    That’s funny coming from a fuckhead. But seriously, its not about liking the dude, it is about acknowledging that he was right, and that Patty B. was trying to weasel out of distorting established Catholic doctrine and questioning the decisions of two Popes. Now, I don’t know if the prohibition on the Death Penalty was issued ex cathedra or not, but a good Catholic would not be doing such things, much less on the TeeVee™.

    I think you may totally be overlooking my whimsical nature.

    That aside, there was no reason for O’Donnell to yell and carry on. He wasn’t making an emotional argument. He was making a logical one. If anything was called for it was a mocking, belittling tone.

  46. 46.

    eemom

    April 9, 2009 at 7:53 pm

    I have a rule — when I see the words "Karl Rove" I stop reading. Does wonders for the blood pressure.

    btw NO animal, certainly not a pig and not even a worm, deserves to be compared to these creatures.

  47. 47.

    Laura W

    April 9, 2009 at 7:53 pm

    @asiangrrlMN:

    Wow. I didn’t know Lawrence had it in him….Lawrence OWNED Pat.

    I did. He used to own me.
    He sent sparklets through my teevee screen that ricocheted around my couch. I think he winked at me.
    Still The One!

  48. 48.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 7:56 pm

    @MikeJ: "zeeëend (seaduck)" is an awesome Dutch word.

    There is a bar in Amsterdam named De Twee Zwantys (the Two Swans), which also represents a mellifluous combination of words(although lacking in diaereses).

  49. 49.

    JL

    April 9, 2009 at 7:57 pm

    I love that Pat calls his Libertarian friends, comrades. Can you imagine the hate Pat would spew if our President called his audience comrades.

  50. 50.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 8:00 pm

    I think you may totally be overlooking my whimsical nature.

    I am well aware of all your internet traditions.

    If anything was called for it was a mocking, belittling tone.

    Um, I think KO’s got that angle covered. Probably has the copyright.

  51. 51.

    LD50

    April 9, 2009 at 8:01 pm

    LD50, wikipedia has articles explaining the difference between heavy metal umlauts and diaereses.

    I understand the difference perfectly well, I just choose to disregard it.

  52. 52.

    The Dangerman

    April 9, 2009 at 8:03 pm

    Careful with that axe, Barack.

  53. 53.

    Zuzu's Petals

    April 9, 2009 at 8:03 pm

    @Paddy:

    Buchanan’s ignorance of his own church’s teachings is stunning.

  54. 54.

    AhabTSp'nker

    April 9, 2009 at 8:04 pm

    @LD50: I understand the difference perfectly well, I just choose to disregard it.

    Apostate!
    That’s it, buddy! Up against the wall!

  55. 55.

    LD50

    April 9, 2009 at 8:06 pm

    Apostate!
    That’s it, buddy! Up against the wall!

    Bïtê më.

  56. 56.

    AhabTRuler

    April 9, 2009 at 8:10 pm

    @LD50: We have ways of making you suffer a fatal embolism in a vacuüm chamber.

  57. 57.

    demkat620

    April 9, 2009 at 8:12 pm

    @Zuzu’s Petals: As a catholic, it is embarrassing to me the people the media uses to represent catholics: Pat Buchanan, Bill Donohue, and Bob Novak. And now I get to be embarrassed by Newt Gingrich.
    These professional christians are going to be the death of us all.

  58. 58.

    Laura W

    April 9, 2009 at 8:13 pm

    @asiangrrlMN:

    Yeah, I know it gave Pat the opportunity to call him shrill or whatever,

    "Hysterical", and we all know how misogynistic that word is.

  59. 59.

    asiangrrlMN

    April 9, 2009 at 8:14 pm

    @Laura W:

    Hahahaha. You know who sends starbursts through my brain when I see him on Olbermann or Rachel? Paul Krugman. All I have to do is hear the words, "Nobel prize-winning economist…", and I sit up a bit straighter in my seat. I want to buy that man a drink and talk economics all night long. If that isn’t lust–then what is?

    Just Some Fuckhead, it was emotional, though. Obviously, O’Donnell feels very deeply about his religion. I thought it was refreshing to see some honest emotion out of him rather than smugness.

  60. 60.

    AhabTRuler

    April 9, 2009 at 8:19 pm

    Paul Krugman.

    What can be said? The man can take a sweater & medal look and make it work. Who is gonna argue with that?
    No one, that’s who!

    Edit: It has been said before; it will be said again: this website is deeply and intrinsically damaged.

  61. 61.

    Laura W

    April 9, 2009 at 8:20 pm

    @asiangrrlMN: Fuckhead is jealous trolling. It drives him mad to think that you and I are HOT for Lawrence. It’s an old, festering wound for him. Best to just let it go. Male pride and all.

  62. 62.

    Zuzu's Petals

    April 9, 2009 at 8:30 pm

    @asiangrrlMN:

    I have never seen Lawrence get so worked up.

    Except maybe when he called John "Swift Boat" O’Neill a liar to his face.

    Wish I could find the video. It’s priceless.

  63. 63.

    asiangrrlMN

    April 9, 2009 at 8:41 pm

    @Laura W: Ah, I get your quip on the other thread now. I will not feed into the insecurity any more.

    As for hysterical, yeah, gotta love the history of that word. Not.

    Zuzu’s Petals, if you find it, post it!

  64. 64.

    gex

    April 9, 2009 at 8:53 pm

    @Library Grape: Oh come on. I think it is pretty clear we can only use our powers for evil.

  65. 65.

    Library Grape

    April 9, 2009 at 8:56 pm

    @gex: Oh, believe me, I can do evil things to Colin Farrell if given the power to turn him gay.

  66. 66.

    kommrade reproductive vigor

    April 9, 2009 at 8:57 pm

    3.) Robert Peters, trying to “connect the dots” between mass murder and gay marriage (hint- there isn’t one).

    Yep. Little known fact: Pol Pot was a sweet gentle bloke until he was driven mad by gay marriage. Idi Amin. Also.

    Edit: Now I’ve got that song stuck in my head. Thanks.

  67. 67.

    asiangrrlMN

    April 9, 2009 at 8:59 pm

    @Library Grape: See, now, that is why teh idiots are afeered of teh gayz!

  68. 68.

    Library Grape

    April 9, 2009 at 9:02 pm

    @asiangrrlMN: Sodomy in the streets! Madonna installed as High Minister of Culture! Dog and cats living together! Mass hysteria!

  69. 69.

    Calouste

    April 9, 2009 at 9:02 pm

    @kommrade reproductive vigor:

    Yep. Little known fact: Pol Pot was a sweet gentle bloke until he was driven mad by gay marriage. Idi Amin. Also.

    All those mass shootings recently also happened in states that have or are about to legalize gay marriage. And countries like Denmark, Canada, the Netherlands and Spain that have legalized gay marriage are completely rife with mass shootings.

  70. 70.

    mcd410x

    April 9, 2009 at 10:13 pm

    nice post title. you gotta stem the evil tide, and keep it all on the inside.

    i wonder if pink conceived of being able to queue up a song on the ipod right after reading the title on a blog transmitted over the internets?

  71. 71.

    Chi-city

    April 10, 2009 at 9:37 am

    What I find frustrating is that main stream media give these bozos prime real estate to espouse their spin as if it is fact. I canceled my WSJ subscription and told them specifically that I could not believe they hired Rove. He is what is wrong with the conservative religious right. Has he had one useful idea in his life or has it always been about power?

  72. 72.

    Dr.BDH

    April 10, 2009 at 2:08 pm

    …having personal approval ratings that Bush would have killed for.

    You already have forgotten: Bush did kill for those approval ratings. 4000 Americans, hundreds of thousands of Iraqis.

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