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You are here: Home / TV & Movies / Movies / Open Thread

Open Thread

by John Cole|  May 13, 20095:45 pm| 47 Comments

This post is in: Movies

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Eating dinner, flipping through channels, and I am pleasantly surprised to see that The Tao of Steve is on HBO.

Quote: “What do you look for in women?”

“Low standards.”

Much better than Hardball.

*** Update ***

Apparently, I have completed the sisyphean ordeal of getting this blog published to Kindle, and it will be available in 48-72 hours.

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Previous Post: « Suck It Up, Lads
Next Post: You Will Let Me Know When Those Lambs Stop Screaming, Won’t You? »

Reader Interactions

47Comments

  1. 1.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    May 13, 2009 at 5:49 pm

    “What do you look for in women?”

    “Low standards.”

    Hey, he stole my answer!

  2. 2.

    demkat620

    May 13, 2009 at 5:59 pm

    My husband made me dinner,

    NY Strip with mozzarella, basil, garlic and tomato topping, fried potatoes and fresh green beans.

    And the Chocolate Mousse cake for dessert.

    Yummy!

  3. 3.

    robertdsc

    May 13, 2009 at 5:59 pm

    DIAF, Harry Reid. Soonest

    Your spinelessness is killing the country.

  4. 4.

    JenJen

    May 13, 2009 at 6:01 pm

    May I suggest “The Real Housewives Of New York Reunion Show” on Bravo?

    No? OK. But it is rather interesting for a working-class stiff like me see how the other 2% lives, and learning what it is, exactly, that they have to bitch about. Something like “Owl Jewelry” and “OMG you weren’t sincere when you co-hosted my Manhattan charity event with a dozen other women.” Oy!! Such problems.

    It really is quite fascinating.

    @demkat620: Gotta say, your hubby sounds perfect. Does he have any brothers/single friends? ;-)

  5. 5.

    Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist

    May 13, 2009 at 6:07 pm

    Much better than Hardball.

    No argument here, but speaking of low standards…

  6. 6.

    JL

    May 13, 2009 at 6:12 pm

    Seems as though I need a mate quickly.

    Alzheimer’s doctors also reported new discoveries about certain lifestyle factors that may accelerate or slow the dementia that often precedes Alzheimer’s. Swedish psychologists studied rates of the disease in a sample of 1,449 people over a period of 21 years. They found, as previous research has suggested, that single people have up to twice the risk of developing Alzheimer’s as their married counterparts. But what was unexpected was the finding that the reason for a person’s singlehood impacts his or her risk. Compared with other singletons, people who were single as a result of divorce or widowing had a three times and six times greater risk, respectively.

    In other news, I had jury duty today. In the county that I live in, it’s one day or one trial. After a few hours of sitting, it appeared that I was not needed and was sent home.

  7. 7.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    May 13, 2009 at 6:14 pm

    Thanks for all the kind words last night BTW. In the end the cardiologist chickened out (he had contacted Onslow Memorial Hospital for the low down on DH’s MRI disaster) and decided that if DH was going to go into toxic shock he would be better going into a hospital to do it rather than in his office (which is where the cath was scheduled for)! Anyhoo, he is now going to have the cath done tomorrow in Wilmington at the hospital and the good part is that the new doc says that short of a bypass if anything needs doing (ie angioplasty, stents etc.,) he will do them WHILE he is doing the test as opposed to just getting the test in the cardio office and then having to go to the hospital for the surgery. Again thanks for the kind thoughts. I will let you guys know how everything goes tomorrow.

  8. 8.

    Gordon, The Big Express Engine

    May 13, 2009 at 6:17 pm

    Love that movie.

    1. Remove desire
    2. Do something excellent in her presence
    3. Retreat

    Works every time!

    The “women smell an agenda” exchange with the roommate is one of the best of all time.

    The current crop of Republicans are definitely Stu’s, not Steve’s.

  9. 9.

    JL

    May 13, 2009 at 6:26 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt: Please take care and we will be thinking of you and dh. hugs!

  10. 10.

    tomdurk

    May 13, 2009 at 6:26 pm

    I love that movie

  11. 11.

    JenJen

    May 13, 2009 at 6:26 pm

    @JL: Jury Duty? You could have just sent them this.

    I’m one of those weirdos who has twice been called to jury duty, and has never been selected, and it kind of pisses me off to this day. Why am I not good enough for them!? :-( Were you offended, or is it just me?

    @Litlebritdifrnt: Thinking about you!! Hang with ’em, sweetheart. All of our best thoughts and intentions!

  12. 12.

    Laura W

    May 13, 2009 at 6:27 pm

    Warning: Convoluted Comment Ahead. Try to keep up. Pinot Grigio might help:

    OK, so I was enjoying the previous post so much (“Suck It, Lads”) and about to say it was my favorite of the month so far and then I clicked through to the Epicurean Dealmaker (which is a tasty hot name for a blog) and enjoyed myself more there until I got distracted by a blog on his roll titled: Chase me, ladies, I’m in the cavalry because it reminded me of the “women with low standards” theme of this post, and I enjoyed even more enjoyment over there. Be sure to scroll down to Celebrity News (looking at you, JenJen!)

    See how all that comes full circle?

  13. 13.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    May 13, 2009 at 6:28 pm

    @JL:

    My boss always says to clients who are facing a jury trial. “You have to remember you are facing twelve people who are not smart enough to get out of jury duty” :) Sounds cruel I know but generally the folks around here who are happy to serve on juries are either a) unemployed, b) retired, or during the summer c) employed by the school systems. We once had a jury pool that consisted entirely of retired marines, teachers and the unemployed (one an unemployed fast food restaurant worker!) Retired marines (particularly senior officers) are VERY conservatively minded (hence our county voting overwhelmingly republican last election despite NC turning blue), they tend to think “if you have been charged with something you are guilty” teachers are also not good (although my boss has never articulated why) and the unemployed? Tends to speak for itself (in this area where there is almost 100% employment). I keep getting jury summonses despite the fact that the clerks all know that I am not a citizen, but the puter keeps spitting out my name.

  14. 14.

    Mike G

    May 13, 2009 at 6:32 pm

    ANN COULTER – now FREE! of rabies

  15. 15.

    TenguPhule

    May 13, 2009 at 6:39 pm

    Hey John, when are you going to pick up that copy of Guards Guards waiting for you?

  16. 16.

    bvac

    May 13, 2009 at 6:40 pm

    I’ve never seen it mentioned, but one of the things I most appreciate about your blog is the iPhone theme. Especially useful when Ann Coulter ads start cropping up.

  17. 17.

    demkat620

    May 13, 2009 at 6:40 pm

    @JenJen: Sorry no, he is one of a kind.

    Actually to tell a tale out of school today is my birthday and I actually got a Happy Mother’s Day card with the word Mother scratched out and the word Birthday written in.

    If he had done it in crayon it would have been a perfect Monty Python skit.

  18. 18.

    Dennis-SGMM

    May 13, 2009 at 6:41 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt:
    We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world; and its efficiency is only marred by the difficulty of finding twelve men every day who don’t know anything and can’t read.
    Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain) – Fourth of July Speech, 1873.

  19. 19.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    May 13, 2009 at 6:42 pm

    @Laura W:

    Lol Laura I love it (but sometimes hate it) when that happens, I get myself caught in a linky dink black hole and then look at the clock and “bam” four hours have gone. (Happens to me alot at youtube).

  20. 20.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    May 13, 2009 at 6:44 pm

    @Dennis-SGMM:
    I LOVE THAT QUOTE, I shall have to use it next time my boss is giving his client pre-jury trial speech.

    PS) I particularly love the jury selection scenes in “My Cousin Vinny” when the lady says after a long and eloquent speech by the DA “fry em” and the DA says “she’ll do” sounds a bit like what goes on around here.

  21. 21.

    passerby

    May 13, 2009 at 6:49 pm

    Apparently, I have completed the sisyphean ordeal of getting this blog published to Kindle, and it will be available in 48-72 hours.

    What will this mean exactly? Last week TimF cued me into typing balloon-juice into to the url box and I could read and comment from Kindle. Woohoo.

    Does it mean that your Balloon Juice will be available from the Blog section of the KindleStore page? I’m still learning what all Kindle can do.

  22. 22.

    Laura W

    May 13, 2009 at 6:51 pm

    @JenJen:

    Why am I not good enough for them!?

    Let it rain on you, JenJen.

    Edit: Happy Birthday Demkat!

  23. 23.

    JenJen

    May 13, 2009 at 6:53 pm

    @Laura W: Hey now! I got a big kick out of the “I got into a fist fight with JK Galbraith” post! “Don’t be a c**t.” Words to live by!

    “Suck It, Lads” is the Best Post – May Winner by a mile, regardless. Although it’s only the 13th and stuff could happen.

    Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to GoDaddy to explore my “Epicurean Dealmaker” URL options. I anticipate said options to be quite favorable, but we will see.

    @demkat620: I’ll reiterate that you have one kick-ass hubby and I hope the boys are paying attention, you lucky-ducky!! Happy birthday, babe!

    @Laura W: (Twice in one post!!) You got me, but good!! Bwaaaaaaaaaah! Best belly-laugh of the day, my friend!!

  24. 24.

    Tim F.

    May 13, 2009 at 6:55 pm

    I don’t get publishing blogs on Kindle, or at least this blog. I surf the site with my Kindle v1.0 for free.

  25. 25.

    Tim F.

    May 13, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    From ‘corrections’ section in the Onion:

    Last Friday’s “Uncorked” feature should have stated that the 2005 Louis Jadot Beaujolais-Villages pairs perfectly with roast duck in plum sauce, not fig-braised lamb shank, as was printed. The Onion apologizes to those who heeded the incorrect advice and suffered through a less than satisfactory pairing.

    Heh. Unless it was still ’05, he only thing I would pair with a 2005 Louis Jadot Beaujolais-Villages is other bottles for recycling.

  26. 26.

    Laura W

    May 13, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    @Tim F.: Thanks for the tip last night about backing up my MacBook Pro. I did my google homework this morn, learned that I need Leopard (still on Tiger), went to Mac Forums to find Leopard Haters, freaked out, and backed away in a panic. All I need is to fuck shit up trying to save shit, you know?

    Emailed a co-worker who loves her Leopard/Time Machine and she talked me down and told me exactly what external hard drive to buy on amazon. As soon as I gather up the courage, I will go buy the drive, and Leopard, on Amazon, via BJ link.
    Probably not tonight. Not feeling so brave.
    Edit: Big LOL on the Onion pairing advice.

  27. 27.

    robertdsc

    May 13, 2009 at 7:08 pm

    Lol Laura I love it (but sometimes hate it) when that happens, I get myself caught in a linky dink black hole and then look at the clock and “bam” four hours have gone. (Happens to me alot at youtube).

    Wikipedia and Google Maps on my iPhone can do the same thing.

  28. 28.

    JL

    May 13, 2009 at 7:09 pm

    @JenJen: Actually I would not mind serving except on gruesome cases. I think that the death penalty should be used as leverage to convince those who are guilty to plead out for life w/o parole. The only time I was close was for a murder trial where a 17 year old killed an off duty police man. The defense attorneys were obviously looking for mothers of sons. I would have qualified for that. They had their pool after going through 65 potential jurors. I was 67. That would have been a tough situation. All the other times, my role has been to sit.

  29. 29.

    JL

    May 13, 2009 at 7:16 pm

    Where’s BOB. I have not been able to read all the posts the last few days but I noticed that he has been missing since his gays are Nazi’s rant. Maybe he has found a therapist that will have sort through his various personality disorders.

  30. 30.

    Laura W

    May 13, 2009 at 7:22 pm

    @JL: Oh no. He was in an earlier thread.
    I just creeped myself out.
    I swear I am not stalking BOB.

  31. 31.

    JL

    May 13, 2009 at 7:28 pm

    @Laura W: Oh shit!
    Normally I bless my shit but not in this case. His brown shirt rant was over the line.

  32. 32.

    Josh Hueco

    May 13, 2009 at 7:40 pm

    Garçon, I’ll have the can of Guinness and whatever’s leftover in the fridge.

  33. 33.

    Laura W

    May 13, 2009 at 7:40 pm

    @JL: BOB is often one toke over the line, Sweet Jesus, JL.
    For the sake of your own sanity, you just need to decide if you are going to take him seriously or let him run his patterns. Or performance art scripts. Whatever you decide to label it. He exists to provoke. Dig?

  34. 34.

    JenJen

    May 13, 2009 at 7:48 pm

    @JL: Well done. The second time I made it all the way to jury interviews and didn’t make the jury, I tracked down the defense attorney in a cafe across the street. He told me I was “rather analytical” for a jury. We left it at that (it’s not like he was going to say more) but he did buy me a refreshing cocktail!

    It’s an awesome system.

  35. 35.

    Josh Hueco

    May 13, 2009 at 7:49 pm

    @Laura W:

    FWIW, I’ve been Leopard/Time Capsule for over six months and have had no problems. I think the problem with going online to the forums is that the people who’ve had the worst experiences post because they’re so pissed about it. People like me who’ve had no problems aren’t worked up enough to post.

    But whatever you do, no matter how much your Mac begs, never, ever…install Symantec Internet Security 4. I had it for five days and uninstalled it because it was crashing my Mac constantly.

  36. 36.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    May 13, 2009 at 7:54 pm

    Some assembly required. This is a photo of one of my cats I took this evening. (Max) I have a crafts table, where I mat and frame my photographs, do all sorts of other stuff, covered in screws and glue and brown paper (for backing the photos) and other stuff and a shoe box where I keep the envelopes that keep my seeds that I have collected from years past. The cats have dragged over a piece of brown paper, laid it over the shoe box and that is now the prime place to sleep. However, in order to sleep in said box one must sort of dissassemble ones parts and reassemble them in an order that makes no sense. I give you exhibit A.

    http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v641/MsNick40/?action=view&current=040.jpg

    exhibit B

    http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v641/MsNick40/?action=view&current=039.jpg

  37. 37.

    Mike in NC

    May 13, 2009 at 7:55 pm

    Where’s BOB. I have not been able to read all the posts the last few days but I noticed that he has been missing since his gays are Nazi’s rant. Maybe he has found a therapist that will have sort through his various personality disorders.

    Now THAT is one tall order.

  38. 38.

    Tim F.

    May 13, 2009 at 8:02 pm

    But whatever you do, no matter how much your Mac begs, never, ever…install Symantec Internet Security 4. I had it for five days and uninstalled it because it was crashing my Mac constantly.

    Here is a simple rule of thumb: if a Symantec product is marketed for home use, avoid it like the plague. Don’t mistake the quality of their corporate products for the memory-destroying crappiness of their cheaper stuff.

    As far as I can tell Macs don’t need any extra security of performance software. The only virus that I ever heard of propagates by people downloading illegal copies of iLife. Don’t do that and you’re fine.

  39. 39.

    Laura W

    May 13, 2009 at 8:06 pm

    @Josh Hueco: See, that’s why I think you are way super smart! You said just what I said in my HALP email to my co-worker:

    But I know in these cases you only here from the small percent of users with the nightmares, right? People who have no issues are not as inclined to post.

    (Except I apparently really did say “here”. So you said what I said, only way smarter.)

  40. 40.

    South of I-10

    May 13, 2009 at 8:09 pm

    @demkat620: Sounds like your husband and mine have the same sense of humor. I got a get well soon card with flowers for our anniversary last year. If he sends flowers, the card is always signed “Love, Steve”, which is not his name. If I ever received a card with his actual name on it, I would wonder what was wrong.

  41. 41.

    Josh Hueco

    May 13, 2009 at 8:09 pm

    @Tim F.:

    Believe me I won’t ever forget now. I do a lot of online business-type activities and only thought it would be good to have that extra wall of security. I installed Symantec and my Mac started acting like it had a virus instead of being protected from one. Sigh.

    Note to self: Maybe it isn’t such a bad idea to listen to the nightmare stories on the forums after all. But I’ll still take the compliment, Laura :)

  42. 42.

    Laura W

    May 13, 2009 at 8:11 pm

    @South of I-10: I’m sorry, but that is HYSTERICAL! (The combo of the Get Well Wish + the wrong name.)
    Sweet, Silly, Funny Valentine, Comic Romance.

  43. 43.

    Rosali

    May 13, 2009 at 8:32 pm

    Do you mean that it will be on Kindle on a paid subscription basis? How much?

  44. 44.

    Jess

    May 13, 2009 at 10:15 pm

    @Laura W:

    My former husband and I got married on our best friends’ first anniversary (not planned–just worked out that way). They gave us a very tasteful sympathy card–“We share your sorrow,” etc.

    Tao of Steve–great movie!

    Edit: come to think of it, our friends got divorced just about a year after we did, as well. Hmmm…

  45. 45.

    Steeplejack

    May 13, 2009 at 10:22 pm

    @TenguPhule:

    Guards! Guards!

    I am about 140 pages in now and enjoying it more. Once the plot got going Pratchett dialed the shtick down from 11 to a more bearable level. It’s no longer affecting me like “Would you like a side order of dark chocolate with your triple-chocolate cake?”

    I did have my first LOL moment when Captain Vimes goes all Dirty Harry on the rioting mob with a little swamp dragon under his arm.

    “Now I know what you’re thinking,” Vimes went on, softly. “You’re wondering, after all this excitement, has it got enough flame left? And, y’know, I ain’t so sure myself . . .”

    Cole: I think, with your military background, you would like this book. Captain Vimes’s Night Watch is a prototypically hapless unit.

  46. 46.

    Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist

    May 13, 2009 at 11:23 pm

    @Steeplejack: Cole: I think, with your military background, you would like this book. Captain Vimes’s Night Watch is a prototypically hapless unit.

    That’s what I was thinking recommending the Watch books in particular to John – though I have no military experience myself, what I’ve heard from my friends who have sounds an awful lot like Watch stuff.

    Once the plot got going Pratchett dialed the shtick down from 11 to a more bearable level.

    The newer books are lower-key. Keep with it and you’ll find this trend continues. Have fun with ’em!

  47. 47.

    Roger Moore

    May 14, 2009 at 2:58 am

    Apparently, I have completed the sisyphean ordeal of getting this blog published to Kindle, and it will be available in 48-72 hours.

    It’s up now. I just subscribed. I’m not sure how much I’ll read it on the Kindle- it looks as though you don’t get the comments, which are the best part- but I know that some tiny fraction of my cheap-ass subscription payment will trickle into the coffers here.

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