Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Beware of advice from anyone for whom Democrats are “they” and not “we.”

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

I really should read my own blog.

It is not hopeless, and we are not helpless.

Books are my comfort food!

Red lights blinking on democracy’s dashboard

It’s easy to sit in safety and prescribe what other people should be doing.

There are more Russians standing up to Putin than Republicans.

After dobbs, women are no longer free.

America is going up in flames. The NYTimes fawns over MAGA celebrities. No longer a real newspaper.

So many bastards, so little time.

Trumpflation is an intolerable hardship for every American, and it’s Trump’s fault.

’Where will you hide, Roberts, the laws all being flat?’

Marge, god is saying you’re stupid.

Republicans got rid of McCarthy. Democrats chose not to save him.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

There is no right way to do the wrong thing.

Let’s bury these fuckers at the polls 2 years from now.

T R E 4 5 O N

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

🎶 Those boots were made for mockin’ 🎵

If you cannot answer whether trump lost the 2020 election, you are unfit for office.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

“Can i answer the question? No you can not!”

You are here: Home / Coming Clean

Coming Clean

by | 139 Comments

This post is in: 

Interesting:

The unmarried mother’s story about giving birth to a child diagnosed as terminally ill in the womb hit a major nerve on the Internet.

Every night for the last two months, thousands of abortion opponents across the nation logged on to a blog run by the suburban Chicago woman who identified herself only as “B” or “April’s Mom.”

People said they prayed that God would save her pregnancy. They e-mailed her photos of their children dressed in pink, bought campaign T-shirts, shared tales of personal heartache and redemption, and sent letters and gifts to an Oak Lawn P.O. box in support.

***

By Sunday night, when “April’s Mom” claimed to have given birth to her “miracle baby” — blogging that April Rose had survived a home birth only to die hours later — her Web site had nearly a million hits.

There was only one problem with the unfolding tragedy: None of it was true.

After some soul-searching, this story has made me decide to finally come clean with you all. I’m not really John Cole, I’m Jane Coale, a 72 year old pensioner and grandmum from Newcastle staying with my daughter and her American husband. Tunch is actually the neighbors pot-bellied pig, and Lily is my granddaughter. My daughter told me to write about the Steelers to make this blog seem realistic, my loyalties actually lie in this order: God, the Queen, and the Newcastle United.

You’ve all been real sports for playing along.

Reader Interactions

139Comments

  1. 1.

    jon

    That should be England, Newcastle Brown Ale, and then the footies.

    Clearly, you aren’t a true Englishwoman. You probably brew tea from bags, Colonial!

  4. 4.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    Well that explains the cat obsession.

    Except it replaces it with one for pigs, which may be more troubling.

    PS Dusting your pig for fleas and letting it sleep on the couch is definitely a ratcheting up, not down, of weirdness, the more I think about it. Not to mention plying a pig with cat toys and catnip.

  5. 5.

    Krista

    Tunch is actually the neighbors pot-bellied pig

    Well THAT actually makes quite a bit of sense — we knew he was too damn big to be a cat.

  6. 6.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    Thank goodness because no one in their right mind would be a fucking Steelers fan. And absolutely NO adult male with a shred of decency would wear a players jersey in public. Whew. I am quite relieved.

  7. 7.

    JL

    Lily is my granddaughter

    You definitely need to tell us more about your past relationships.

  9. 9.

    JL

    Let’s not forget that Tunch was named after a football player.
    Was Lily excited about her morning walk?

  10. 10.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    From the article:

    “Soon I was getting 100,000 hits a week, and it just got out of hand,” she said. “I didn’t know how to stop. … One lie led to another.”

    That could serve as the anthem for the entire Wingnutosphere.

  11. 11.

    El Cid

    The point of these types of stories is that the central action figures are scammers, whether completely deliberately or a mix of crazed attention hounds and scammers.

  13. 13.

    Svensker

    She even scammed a friend who’d had a baby die just after birth. The girl needs a good shrink.

    Also. I thought you were Juan Cole.

  17. 17.

    WereBear

    This is the point of fiction; to take real emotions and structure them.

    However, you’re supposed to say it’s fiction.

    While anyone can be scammed this way, the biggest cons are religiously based, since people suspend their disbelief for their faith, and all else follows. Every so often a story surfaces, a law enforcement officer admits “It’s a serious problem,” and it goes underground again.

  19. 19.

    JGabriel

    Jane Coale @ Top:

    Tunch is actually the neighbors pot-bellied pig …

    We KNEW those whiskers were pasted on.

    .

  20. 20.

    Elroy's Lunch

    What? Tunchumus Maximus is not really a cat?

    Elroy’s devasted. Of course, he does love him some pork rinds. With ramps…

  21. 21.

    carsick

    Jane,
    Redstate and many of your former Pajamas Media cohorts never could explain your defection. I suspect now they may run with this post if only to say “Now it finally makes sense”.

  23. 23.

    Matt

    I knew it, I’ve always had my suspicions. Your praise for Paul’s Boutique always seemed forced.

    Now if only Jonah Goldberg would come out as an actual douchebag . . . . . .

  26. 26.

    JGabriel

    So, Jane, I take it that next you’ll be telling us you voted Labor and were never really a conservative at all? That it was just a ruse so US conservatives wouldn’t accuse you of treason for voting sociaIist back in the old country?

    .

  27. 27.

    El Cid

    @SGEW: No. This is a data point about not taking for granted a story that someone tells, with or without a name, without corroborating evidence.

    The same applies to people with or without pseudonyms who claim to have been in the CIA or on Special Ops and happen to have seen or been involved with the exact things that happen to bolster whatever point they want to make.

  31. 31.

    YellowJournalism

    So all those nights when you were having grilled portabello mushrooms, it was really just mac n’ cheese?

    What the person who perpetrated this hoax and the people who grandstanded using “B” as a martyr for the pro-life movement don’t realize is that no matter what direction the story took, all that mattered was that “B” and other women like her have the right to make their decision, regardless of their choice.

  32. 32.

    Fulcanelli

    Well this explains your fetish for house cleaning. Not very sports fanatic guy-like and stuff. Female readers of this blog must be crushed, thinking there was one man out there…

  33. 33.

    Death By Mosquito Truck

    I’m Jane Coale, a 72 year old pensioner and grandmum from Newcastle staying with my daughter

    That’s actually more believable than the John Cole persona. Finally, the cat-grooming sessions make sense. Thank you Jane, and well played!

  34. 34.

    Comrade Stuck

    There was only one problem with the unfolding tragedy: None of it was true.

    It’s not an American story, it’s an American Wingnut story, Tom.

  35. 35.

    Death By Mosquito Truck

    I need to come up with a business plan that fleeces rightwingers. They gotta be the silliest most gullible group of halfwits that ever lived. Maybe it’s a recidivist neanderthal gene or something.

  36. 36.

    debit

    I find it sad that she had something so lacking in her life that she needed approval and attention from total strangers.

  37. 37.

    YellowJournalism

    I find it sad that she had something so lacking in her life that she needed approval and attention from total strangers.

    Are you talking about Sarah Palin or the hoaxster?

  38. 38.

    booferama

    Who in their right mind would put God above Newcastle, either United or Brown? Our father, who art in a pint glass, hallowed be thy ale.

  42. 42.

    burnspbesq

    God, you must be gutted about Newcastle getting relegated. It’ll be even worse when my Nottingham Forest kicks their ass next year on the way to promotion.

  43. 43.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    @Death By Mosquito Truck:

    I need to come up with a business plan that fleeces rightwingers. They gotta be the silliest most gullible group of halfwits that ever lived.

    That’s easy. Stop posting on a blog called Balllon Juice and start a blog called Hot Air.

    Or whatever.

    Malkin and others are making such a fortune off of exactly that, it should be called the new Stupidity Tax.

    Speaking of which, given that “I just kept getting hits and one lie led to another” quote, has anyone traced that IP to see if it leads to Malkin?

  44. 44.

    debit

    @YellowJournalism:

    You know, I did kind of feel sorry for Palin when it became clear she was too stupid to know just how out of her depth she was. But it only lasted for a couple of nano seconds.

    @Ash:

    AUGH!! When will I learn not to click the link?

  45. 45.

    maya

    Well, Jane, time to come clean on this end. You do not have 229 rap followers of this blog. Every last one of them are moi.
    You have no idea how difficult it’s been faking posts over 17 different time zones, coming up with all those Tunch-lines, not to mention all these assorted names. brick oven bill, btw, is the one I’m most proud of and the most taxing to maintain.

    Who am I really? I’m not sure anymore, but the state of Utah has assigned me a number. Unfortunately, I can’t divulge that or I lose my internet privileges.

  46. 46.

    JGabriel

    Death By Mosquito Truck:

    I need to come up with a business plan that fleeces rightwingers.

    Set yourself up as a religious organization to avoid taxes, then collect donations to “fight gay marriage”. If you yourself are gay, don’t be discouraged – that just makes the scam more believable!

    .

  47. 47.

    PattyP

    The upside to this is, the time those morans spent following her phony story is time they didn’t spend planning more assassinations of abortion doctors.

  51. 51.

    Doug H.

    Somewhere out there, P.T. Barnum is cursing himself for not branching out into religion.

  52. 52.

    LD50

    Somewhere out there, P.T. Barnum is cursing himself for not branching out into religion.

    Don’t worry, L. Ron Hubbard learned from PT’s mistakes.

  53. 53.

    steve s

    @Death By Mosquito Truck: They’re really prone to pseudo-science health product scams. Back in the shortwave days the wingnuts bought so much ‘colloidal silver’ that now a number of people are permanently stained blue.

    You ain’t kidding. I’ve got several wingnut relatives. When they aren’t busy worrying that the US gummint is carrying out false flag ops, covering up the link between cell phones and cancer, murdering people with vaccines, and subjecting christians to the worst treatment since the holocaust, they’re busy drinking colloidial silver, eating ‘living clay’ and charcoal, growing sprouts in the fridge for all their “enzymimes”, etc. I try to have as little interaction with them as possible because it’s infuriating.

  54. 54.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    @maya:

    Well, Jane, time to come clean on this end. You do not have 229 rap followers of this blog.

    This is a blog for rap followers?

    See, I didn’t even know that.

    I also really did think that pig was a cat, so what do I know.

  56. 56.

    LD50

    When they aren’t busy worrying that the US gummint is carrying out false flag ops, covering up the link between cell phones and cancer, murdering people with vaccines, and subjecting christians to the worst treatment since the holocaust, they’re busy drinking colloidial silver, eating ‘living clay’ and charcoal, growing sprouts in the fridge for all their “enzymimes”, etc.

    But… it’s got electrolytes!

  58. 58.

    Comrade Stuck

    blogging that April Rose had survived a home birth only to die hours later—her Web site had nearly a million hits.

    By removal of feeding tube would have been a nice touch.

  59. 59.

    Wag

    Long live NUFC and Newkie Broon (although if you like your ale dark, thick and Northern, you should try Theakston’s Olde Peculier). Can we turn this into another beer post? Pretty please? Focusing on obscure English beer like Roger and Out (14%, gummy and warming…).

  62. 62.

    Woody

    You seem quite chipper for a NUFC fan, considering they were relegated this year, nest paw?

    I, personally, was quite disappointed with Tottenham Hotspur, finishing out of Europe this year…

  64. 64.

    b-psycho

    Those nutjob fans of hers are suffering fetishists. WTF, how does someone get brain diseased enough to praise and celebrate needlessly inflicting a couple hours of pain prior to inevitable death, as if it’s a righteous act to have a kid that’s doomed anyway?

  65. 65.

    burnspbesq

    I wonder what Ken Blackwell’s fee was for teaching Ahmadinejad how to steal an election.

  67. 67.

    Ash

    One more thing: this lady DID in fact have a kid a few years ago that died of some birth defect. So I don’t know why she decided to make a whole new one up instead of just recounting her real story. Truly bizarre.

  68. 68.

    asiangrrlMN

    Bwahahahahaha. This is why you guys rule the intertubez. By the way, anyone remember the story of the 9/11 “victim” who had a LiveJournal page? When the “victim” died in the towers, over a thousand people left a tribute on the person’s page. Turns out, the person never existed. The “best friend” of this person invented this guy before the towers fell, and she was tiring of it, so she decided to kill him off in the towers.

    The thing is, if someone is disturbed enough, she can carry off something like this for a good long time. The same thing happened on the cat forum I visited. It really is a sad, twisted need for attention on the part of the perpetrator.

    As for you, Ms. Coale, I’m glad you finally came clean. You sounded way too good to be true!

  69. 69.

    asiangrrlMN

    @Ash: Because then she could shape it to how she wanted it to be. And, she could present it in real time. Actually, the fact that it happened to her may be part of the reason she did this.

  70. 70.

    linda

    comments at the chicago trib are saying even that story is too sympathetic and isn’t truthful. this woman had prepared for her hoax; it wasn’t something that just got out of hand. she was making money off it thru the ad clicks. she sounds like a real piece of work.

    and those babylovedolls linked above by ash are really disturbing. there’s some whacked out freaks out there.

  72. 72.

    El Cid

    @Doug H.:

    @El Cid: Its not just a right-wing trait. Ask on HuffPo sometime about childhood vaccinations.

    No, it’s certainly not, but the right wing consumers of alternative health quackery turn toward their trusted sources, rather than places like the Huffington Post, so you will have to mix your marketing between anti-liberal screeds and anti-modernist whining with anti-doctor and anti-medical testing conpiracism.

  73. 73.

    Thlayli

    @Woody:

    Well, considering the way things started (losing 6 of the first 8), I can’t complain too much about ending up 8th.

    COYS!

  74. 74.

    CapMidnight

    That is okay. I figured out the hoax when you said the Penguins beat our Red Wings.
    But you had me going! For a while, I was totally convinced I was John Cole.

  75. 75.

    Carnacki

    Jane, I wasn’t fooled for a moment. As we know, there’s no such thing as Obama supporters in West Virginia. The Great Orange Satan told us so.

  76. 76.

    Brachiator

    @Death By Mosquito Truck:

    I need to come up with a business plan that fleeces rightwingers.

    Bernie Madoff beat you to it. And obviously, it’s not just rightwingers who are gullible.

    I understand how in the remnant euphoria over Obama’s election, some are basking in the delusion that liberals are singularly possessed of wisdom and a firm grasp on reality, but the most basic understanding of human nature underscores the fact that some people are avaricious, attention-starved, willing to lie to gin up support for their cause, etc.

    Wingnuts are just a subset of suckers, fools and con-bait.

    How long do we have to wait for a rebunking?

    Pretty much already happening, reinforced by the inability of conservative pundits to admit error.

  77. 77.

    Phoebe

    Dying hours later is kind of the fetus-fetishist ideal, as the most precious life of all is the unborn, and then, after it’s born, all downhill from there. Then it’s just a burden on the taxpayer, someone who can have the wrong thoughts, wrong race/language/religion/clothes, and just, ugh, problems problems problems. But the unborn – innocent!

  78. 78.

    sidereal

    I can’t believe there are now 78 comments and only one of them is taunting you over the fact that the Magpies just got sent down and the owner is selling the team for a $100m loss.

    WORK HARDER PEOPLE.

    You wasted N’zogbias and Martins’ talent to sign a hack like Viduka and rest your hopes on the 75-year-old Michael Owen and your only consolation is that Borough is down there slumming it with you. HA HA

  79. 79.

    Death By Mosquito Truck

    Fuck you, Brachiator. I ain’t in the euphoria of anything except maybe a Pens victory.

    Dumbass.

  81. 81.

    jon

    Lady, you blew it when you sold Shay Given. Take your sad arse to the Fizzy Pop league and think about what you did.

    /upthevillansmartinoneillisgod

  82. 82.

    JGabriel

    Brachiator:

    I understand how in the remnant euphoria over Obama’s election, some are basking in the delusion that liberals are singularly possessed of wisdom and a firm grasp on reality …

    Not so much, no. We’re just pretty sure that conservatives are possessed by … well, let’s just leave it at possessed.

    .

  83. 83.

    Brachiator

    @Death By Mosquito Truck:

    Fuck you, Brachiator. I ain’t in the euphoria of anything except maybe a Pens victory.

    Brick Oven Bill, is that you hiding under a pseudonym?

    JGabriel – We’re just pretty sure that conservatives are possessed by … well, let’s just leave it at possessed.

    Anti-abortion spin aside, there ain’t much difference between this hoax and the crapload of debunked stuff that regularly washes up on the shores of Snopes-land.

  85. 85.

    Third Eye Open

    @LD50:

    I admit it, I LOL’d

    I am such a slave to pop-culture touchstones. I almost snort’ld a while back when I came out of the bathroom and overheard someone say, “How much do they pay you to fuck that bear?”

  86. 86.

    Little Dreamer

    I’m not really John Cole, I’m Jane Coale, a 72 year old pensioner and grandmum

    Okay, so who is that poster who identifies herself as your skydiving sister who you just recently requested funding for her death defying sports activity? A sockpuppet? who? Inquiring minds want to know.

    ;)

    I once got involved in an online scam which went public after several of us got together for a real meet-up (coming from all over the US and some from other countries) and I just happened to be staying with the woman who was collecting funds for another one of our unfortunate acquaintances when I found out she was spending the money herself. It got ugly. I ended up staying at someone else’s home for the rest of the festivities.

  89. 89.

    ppcli

    my loyalties actually lie in this order: God, the Queen, and the Newcastle United.

    Well, since God has clearly been very angry with Newcastle United in recent years, you may need to opt for just one or the other.

  92. 92.

    Little Dreamer

    I’m watching CNN’s live coverage of Amadiniwhateverhisname is and I just realized, Iran’s had their own version of George Bush all this time. WOW, why had I never noticed this before?

    And POOF, in the middle of translating a breaking news special report of A-man’s speech, CNN goes directly to commercial. Hmmmmmmmmmm!

  93. 93.

    p.a.

    I didn’t want to destroy anyone’s illusions so I remained silent, but I knew this so-called ‘John Cole’ was a fake all along. The kerning gave it all away.

  94. 94.

    Darren

    Interesting that you would pick the Cleveland Browns of English football. Constantly, claim to be a big club but going backwards, had one great almost season in 1992, similar to the 89 Browns, a storied team that generally has no backs (defense) but when they do, they have no forwards (offense). Given this freudian slip, we may have to question your loyalties to the black and gold and all things Primanti.

  95. 95.

    Davis X. Machina

    Too coherent for a Geordie. On Tyneside, the Godfather makes you an offer you can’t even understand.

  96. 96.

    ThresherK

    Tinley Park crisis pregnancy clinic

    Motto: “Come in with a pregnancy, leave with a crisis.”

    (If it’s anything like the “clinics” the antichoicers favor.)

  97. 97.

    mcd410x

    To bad the Steelers beat the drop in ’88, we might have never heard from them again. Much like Newcastle.

    Cole, totally hysterical post.

  99. 99.

    Death By Mosquito Truck

    @Brachiator:

    Brick Oven Bill, is that you hiding under a pseudonym?

    Wrong again, dumbass. And it’s you doin the trolling here.

  100. 100.

    burnspbesq

    You gave yourself away when you referred to “the Newcastle United.” “The dumbass Geordies” would have been grammatically correct, but “the Newcastle United” is not.

    Forest for the Prem!

  103. 103.

    KRK

    If this blog really were all an elaborate hoax, it seems much more likely that Tunch would be the grandmum from Newcastle (pronounced “Toonch” and a nickname from childhood) while John Coal would be the neighbor’s pot-bellied pig (a variation of “John Bull” to reflect Newcastle’s coal industry).

    Jus’ sayin’.

  105. 105.

    JGabriel

    @Little Dreamer:

    I’m watching CNN’s live coverage of Amadiniwhateverhisname is and I just realized, Iran’s had their own version of George Bush all this time. WOW, why had I never noticed this before?

    I don’t know how you missed that. I’ve been telling people that Ahmadinejad is the Iranian equivalent of Bush – and about as popular – for at least 3 years now. The guy’s popularity, not terribly high to begin with, started going down almost as soon as he took office – again, much like Bush.

    .

  107. 107.

    JGabriel

    @p.a.:

    The kerning gave it all away.

    Exactly! If anyone needs any further confirmation, just look at how the kerning never changed, even after Coale revealed her true identity.

    .

  110. 110.

    jenniebee

    As long as we’re confessing things, I’m not really amused by videos like Hurra Torpedo – Total Eclipse of the Heart (there’s a sledgehammer/stove percussion section!) I just believe so strongly in being amused by them that I got carried away and posted that link even though there is absolutely nothing funny about a Scandanavian music group destroying kitchen appliances while singing cheesy ’80’s pop and wearing track suits.

    Nothing funny at all.

  112. 112.

    Brachiator

    @Death By Mosquito Truck:

    Wrong again, dumbass. And it’s you doin the trolling here.

    You are in serious need of a sense of humor.

    I believe that wingnuts should be mocked early and often. But the idea that wingnuts have a monopoly on foolish beliefs is just immature.

    As immature as your apparent need to gratuitously insult people.

  114. 114.

    Death By Mosquito Truck

    @Brachiator:

    You are in serious need of a sense of humor. I believe that wingnuts should be mocked early and often. But the idea that wingnuts have a monopoly on foolish beliefs is just immature. As immature as your apparent need to gratuitously insult people.

    Go back and read yer thread debut, dumbass. It was you that felt the need to gratuitously insult everyone. And now you got BOB riffing hilariously on yer dumb ass too.

    If you don’t like my immaturity then don’t fucking reply to me with your nonsense again.

  115. 115.

    Allan

    I look forward to YouTube videos of your thrilling rendition of “I Dreamed a Dream,” Jane. Best of luck in the finals!

  116. 116.

    tavella

    Does anyone recall a story, I think it was linked to by John at one point, about how one guy broke out of the fundamentalist/anti-abortion mindset? He was a good little footsoldier, protesting and all. The local group had a sort of a fetish, an ancephalic child one of the members had borne. He’d never seen the child, but there were all sorts of stories about how high functioning he was and how he smiled and laughed and knew who his parents were.

    So one day they were having a picnic/get-together for the local Operation Rescue (or whatever) group, and the child was going to be there and he was all excited to meet the Miracle Baby. Except that said miracle baby stared emptily at the world, not even reacting to flies landing on his face, just a lifeless rag doll, while everyone around him cooed and said how amazing it was.

    And the sheer cognitive dissonance finally got through to him and he started thinking for himself.

    If anyone remembers the name or has a link, I’d be grateful!

  117. 117.

    Dick Weathers

    @Ash:

    Why would anyone want to buy one of those? Don’t get me wrong, they’re very impressive and look very life like, but what do you do with one of them? Put it in a crib in the guest bedroom, glass cabinet in the den?

  118. 118.

    Moonbatting Average

    piling on these poor, gullible right-wingers is like carrying Coles (Coales?) to Newcastle

  120. 120.

    Anne Laurie

    This is the point of fiction; to take real emotions and structure them.
    …
    However, you’re supposed to say it’s fiction.

    Marianne Moore said that poetry is “an imaginary garden containing a real toad.”
    That was back before the intertoobz made all metaphors literal.

  121. 121.

    Anne Laurie

    Why would anyone want to buy one of those [reborn dolls]? Don’t get me wrong, they’re very impressive and look very life like, but what do you do with one of them? Put it in a crib in the guest bedroom, glass cabinet in the den?

    For the most dedicated, it’s an art project that turns into performance art. First they pick out the perfect kit, spend dozens of hours hand-painting tiny details and inserting individual eyelashes, buying all the proper outfits & accessories. Then they take their “baby” out in public, strapping it into an infant car seat, toting it in a snugli around the mall, generally one-upping their fellow reborners and grossing out everyone else.

    Even if you can’t understand the impulse, look at it this way: The women doing this might otherwise be acting out their fantasies on real babies, or at least unfortunate small dogs. The whole thing is too ‘Uncanny Valley’ for me — I like my dolls to look like dolls — but then my own maternal instincts are pretty vestigial. Still, it’s amusing to see men whose social lives revolve around watching other guys get paid to play games explaining earnestly how peculiar the reborners are!

  123. 123.

    Wile E. Quixote

    @JGabriel

    Aaargh! Why can I never remember that sociaIist will get you sent straight to Modererationville?
    .


    Wastin away again in moderationville
    cuz I posted bout So ci al ism
    Some people claim that Johnny Cole is to blame
    But I know, that it’s WordPress’s fault

  124. 124.

    Wile E. Quixote

    @El Cid

    @SGEW: No. This is a data point about not taking for granted a story that someone tells, with or without a name, without corroborating evidence.

    The same applies to people with or without pseudonyms who claim to have been in the CIA or on Special Ops and happen to have seen or been involved with the exact things that happen to bolster whatever point they want to make.

    I like those posts, especially when the author goes into a “You want the truth. You can’t handle the truth?” spew when questioned, at which point you know he’s a chickenshit neocon dipshit who couldn’t get into the military because he only scored 14 on the ASVAB. But the posts I really love are the ones where the author uses 1/32nd scale models and his backyard sandbox to recreate events in a combat zone 11 time zones away.

  125. 125.

    Glocksman

    Coale from Newcastle….
    Heh..as a Hoosier living in the heart of Indiana’s coal country I have to laugh.

    Though I will say that I didn’t think Tunch was quite that large….

    As an aside, my Steelers logo car plate and sideline shirt came in the mail yesterday.

    I’ve been a Steelers fan since 1974, so fuck the Colts.

  126. 126.

    Sm*t Cl*de

    I find it sad that she had something so lacking in her life that she needed approval and attention from total strangers.

    Touche.

  127. 127.

    WMass

    Bunch of Geordie fakers.
    A test? Real Geordies know the lyrics to Cushie Butterfield.

  128. 128.

    Michael

    I like those posts, especially when the author goes into a “You want the truth. You can’t handle the truth?” spew when questioned, at which point you know he’s a chickenshit neocon dipshit who couldn’t get into the military because he only scored 14 on the ASVAB. But the posts I really love are the ones where the author uses 1/32nd scale models and his backyard sandbox to recreate events in a combat zone 11 time zones away.

    My personal favorite was Trident/Delta, a FReeper. For years he’d been posting about his exploits, but his list got a little long. According to him, he’d been Delta, a SEAL, a lawyer, a Ranger, a doctor, a judge and Airborne. He’d carved out a career as some sort of forensic computer investigator.

    He finally stepped in it when he sent out a legally intimidating letter to somebody in an inconsequential board war – as it turned out, he’d had a brief career as a Radioman 2nd Class (or was it 3rd?) for a few years. He was also affiliated with some halfassed militia outfit called “The US Disaster Relief Command” that used some realistic looking uniforms, rank badges and ribbons. Their “Lieutenant General” had maybe served as an E5 at one time, and had made some money faking a POW experience in Vietnam.

    This outfit (along with his fake credentials) had gotten Trident/Delta into the doors at a pretty well known company, and he’d gotten himself into the Infragard program, as well as some other legitimate disaster relief agencies. He was also a big alien conspiracy theorist.

    We did make sure that all his project partners learned of his real status, which pretty much finished him off as a project partner.

    If I go and look for him now, I notice that he’s worked pretty hard to scrub his traces. Thankfully, he’s old enough by now to be out of any cycle that might put him in a position of genuine responsibility.

  130. 130.

    Morbo

    The story may not have been true, but April Rose will live forever in glurge form.

  131. 131.

    Calouste

    @YellowJournalism:

    So all those nights when you were having grilled portabello mushrooms, it was really just mac n’ cheese?

    No, not mac’n’cheese. Bangers and mash, or fish and chips (mushy peas optional) or maybe a curry. And Jane won’t forget to complain every time to her daugther that American sausages are nothing like real English bangers.

  132. 132.

    Steeplejack

    @asiangrrlMN:

    The same thing happened on the cat forum I visited.

    What, the person made up a history for a fake cat and then killed it off in the 9/11 attacks? That is wack. I could have sworn that all the cats got out of the Twin Towers.

  133. 133.

    Xanthippas

    So let me get this straight…these anti-abortion douchebags think a “miracle baby” is one that lives just long enough to pop out, and only then dies? That’s a victory for the anti-abortion movement?

    No wonder the pro-life movement has such a struggle in this country. We’re up against absolute morons.

  135. 135.

    JGabriel

    @Anne Laurie: Marianne Moore said that poetry is “an imaginary garden containing a real toad.” That was back before the intertoobz made all metaphors literal.

    Emily Dickinson famously said that poetry should make you feel as if the top of your head is coming off.

    I’m rather glad that metaphor is not literal, because … yuck.

    .

  137. 137.

    Dick Weathers

    @Anne Laurie:

    It’s the uncanny value aspect of it that throws me off. I could easily be wrong, but these appear to be life size. If these are little figurines I guess I could see the precious moments angle. That and the whole “adoption” thing on the homepage.

  139. 139.

    Monado

    The story about a pro-lifer hauling around a live anencephalic child can not be true. They normally die within a week at most. One pro-life woman did force a hospital to keep her anencephalic baby on a respirator for 2.5 years at a cost of over $1.8 million and a high level of stress for those who had to care for her. Some of the nurses there quit the profession because of the case. That baby went home a few times but was back with infections. There is no brain and no skull nor skin over the braincase. There may be enough brainstem to keep the infant breathing.

    In one study
    7% died in utero
    18% died during birth
    26% lived between 1 and 60 minutes
    27% lived between 1 and 24 hours
    17% lived between 1 and 5 days
    5% lived 6 or more days

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