Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

People are complicated. Love is not.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

All your base are belong to Tunch.

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

I did not have telepathic declassification on my 2022 bingo card.

Despite his magical powers, I don’t think Trump is thinking this through, to be honest.

JFC, are there no editors left at that goddamn rag?

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

Usually wrong but never in doubt

Just because you believe it, that doesn’t make it true.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

Consistently wrong since 2002

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

Not all heroes wear capes.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

Accountability, motherfuckers.

T R E 4 5 O N

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

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Ugly People

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At the Fire Letterman rally:

The last woman reminded me of the Grinch (“your heart is full of unwashed socks, your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch”), and “He will rape you with his mouth” is tragicomic choice of words.

The most amazing thing about it is that this could just as easily have been a McCain/Palin rally, a tea party, or an anti-abortion protest. Same wingnuts, different signs.

Reader Interactions

96Comments

  1. 1.

    JM

    میمون خامنه‌ایخون بچه هاایران می نوشد

    Dunno, just … thought I’d say that.

  4. 4.

    passerby

    I think I’m just going to go ahead and take the day off.

    Take the day off, my ass.

    On topic: Bet Tunch and Lily were born out of wedlock. We’ll never hear name calling from them and yet they enjoy a quality of life in spite of how they came to be here.

    …a philosophical perspective.

  5. 5.

    Shibby

    That was really funny. I was watching the clip thinking “none of these people really remind me of the Grinch…” Then all of a sudden OMFG it’s the Grinch!

  6. 6.

    jibeaux

    I really think this could have also been tagged with “Manichean zero-sum nihilism” as I previously requested.

  7. 7.

    Fencedude

    Oh wow, that is such a fascinatingly disturbing collection of crazy.

    Especially liked the guy who said he only watches Fox News Channel.

  8. 8.

    The Saff

    Too bad Dave’s ratings have been tanking since the joke aired last week.

    Oh, wait…um, never mind.

  10. 10.

    Joshua Norton

    I’m pretty sure that Foster Grant no longer believes that any publicity is good publicity.

  12. 12.

    taylormattd

    Anyone notice the two guys making out behind the very last woman? You know, the “raping children with his mouth” lady?

  13. 13.

    SGEW

    [insert requisite ethical admonition against mocking mentally handicapped individuals here]

  14. 14.

    Bostondreams

    These people are freaking weird. They even mix up baseball and basketball, for goodness sake. And the glare in the eye ‘his bastard son and slut wife.’

    So what does that make Palin’s older daughter? Don’t these people think? I mean, ‘They think they know sooooo much.’

  16. 16.

    taylormattd

    Actually, now that I watch that again, it looks like the two guys “making out” at the end are Sal and Richard from Howard Stern’s show. Is that right?

  17. 17.

    Fencedude

    So does he have a son or daughter? They were inconsistent on that point.

    Also, I especially liked the guy going on and on about Soc-ialism to this group of people with a collective “WTF?!” look on their faces.

  18. 18.

    Mike S

    ‘Do you like Jay Leno?’

    ‘I only watch FOX News.’

    Dumbest friggin people on the planet.

  22. 22.

    Death By Mosquito Truck

    Meh, wake me when Geraldine Ferraro compares it to slavery or something.

  23. 23.

    Bhall35

    Leno fans. Of course.

    They also forgot Leno’s own jokes about the Palins:

    Gov. Palin announced over the weekend that her 17-year-old unmarried daughter is five months pregnant. And you thought John Edwards was in trouble before! Now he has really done it. — “The Tonight Show With Jay Leno,” 9/2/08

    I’m sure this has been posted here before, but for anyone who hasn’t seen it:

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/shannyn-moore/top-10-reasons-sarah-pali_b_215468.html

  25. 25.

    comrade scott's agenda of rage

    I’m guessing we just saw NYC’s Movement Club in action.

    “My fellow Americans”, oi vey.

    These people do manufacture outrage like nobody’s business. I say, ship em to the Taliban, they’d fit right in.

  26. 26.

    Joshua Norton

    Don’t these people think?

    There are more interlocking layers of stupid here than in an Escher drawing.

  27. 27.

    slag

    You kind of suck at going Galt. I’m considering that a good thing.

    OT: Obama’s currently yammering about banking regulation. Says no to scrapping the system, yes to “closing gaps”. Creating “resolution authority” for large financial firms. I’m ambivalent about whether he’s doing enough on this front but nothing new there.

  28. 28.

    freelancer

    A chicken in every pot, and a post for every thought.

    It’s gotta be a miserable existence for these people, plagued with hypertension and anti-stroke meds to be so butt-hurt all the damned time. See also Pat Boone’s latest missive at WND, “Obama’s coming for the Christians!” (not kidding)

    Enjoy your day off, John.

  29. 29.

    jrg

    Who said political correctness is dead?

    What a bunch of loony haters. I’m running out of popcorn.

  31. 31.

    PaminBB

    Pure, concentrated wingnut.Too bad there seems to be no way to turn it into a force for good.

  32. 32.

    InflatableCommenter

    Tonight show starts new era with Conan Obrien.

    Letterman counters with Palin kerfuffle.

    Any questions?

  33. 33.

    Flitterbic

    “Bastard son and slut wife”.

    Because SHE is a slut for having a child out of wedlock. The father just had sex.

    Idiots.

  37. 37.

    Skepticat

    I don’t have the stomach to watch this clip, but the nasty sneer and the stabbing finger in the screen capture probably encapsulate the essence quite well.

  40. 40.

    slag

    While I’m tired of wingnut prevalence in the media, I strongly approve of showing these people in their natural habitats. It’s like Wingnut Wild Kingdom.

  41. 41.

    Joshua Norton

    Best Protest Evah!

    Literally tens of people showed up*

    *100,000 in Fox numbers.

  43. 43.

    A Mom Anon

    This just makes me sad. Jesus. What the hell is wrong with them?

    If they decided to use all that energy for good instead of evil,we’d have alot less problems in this country. I really can’t stand this shit anymore. It breaks my heart,it really does.

    Also. I heard on the radio this morning that John Ziegler was there,saw the crappy turnout(more media than actual protesters),called a cab and left. Heh. So much for standing on principle and all that rot.

  44. 44.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    @Laura W: Yes. You. Did. And I tip my hat to you milady.

    The last woman reminded me of the Grinch (“your heart is full of unwashed socks, your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch”), and “He will rape you with his mouth” is tragicomic choice of words.

    I wouldn’t touch that with a 39 1/2 foot pole. The three words that describe this crowd is: stink, stank, stunk.

  46. 46.

    jenniebee

    I like the Yenta who advocates closing the borders as a cure for the economy. I wonder what Amity Shlaes had to say about what turning away the 1000 Jews on the SS St. Louis in 1939 did for the economy.

    Turns my stomach the way CBS caves to these people over and over again.

  48. 48.

    HRA

    Now can Sarah go back to her house where she can watch Russia from her kitchen window? Please please please!

  49. 49.

    Legalize

    Don’t these people think?

    The extent of their thinking is what Rush told them the last time they tuned in. That’s why it’s so hilarious to ask them follow-up questions and to watch the smug certainty on their faces morph into that of the clueless fuckwits they really are.

  51. 51.

    jrg

    Another good quote is “your child could be next”. Yep, because of the 300 million people in the U.S., Letterman chose Palin at random.

  53. 53.

    Ash Can

    All right, I call bullshit. Letterman’s producers organized this protest themselves using studio extras, to get laff-riot footage for tonight’s show and to punk Fox News in the process, for yet more laff-riot footage for tomorrow’s show.

    Not that I’m complaining, mind you. It’s a hell of an idea.

    (And if the producers really didn’t have anything to do with this protest, then they must be off lighting candles in church this afternoon, in thanksgiving for the comedy motherlode they’ve been handed.)

  56. 56.

    Bad Horse's Filly

    As much as I think these people deserve to be brought out into the daylight (where hopefully they’ll promptly turn to so much dust) – I want to point out there were only 15 of them by all accounts, out numbered 2 to 1 by ‘media’ (I use that term loosely). So maybe we should wrap this up and move on to more important skewering…

    Oh, wait what am I saying? This is what we do best!

  59. 59.

    Damned at Random

    I feel sorry for Jay Leno. He works so hard and I always thought his Jay walking skits were wonderful – now I’m afraid a big chunk of his audience doesn’t get them

  62. 62.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    I feel sorry for Jay Leno. He works so hard and I always thought his Jay walking skits were wonderful – now I’m afraid a big chunk of his audience doesn’t get them

    Hahaha!

    “Who’s buried in Grant’s Tomb? How are we supposed to know THAT? Oh, Hannity’s on!”

  63. 63.

    oh really

    I only watch Fox News channel.

    Jeebus. Surely, these people realize that while they are protesting against Letterman, there are thousands of miles of inadequately secured border they could be patrolling.

  64. 64.

    Fulcanelli

    @Joshua Norton:

    There are more interlocking layers of stupid here than in an Escher drawing.

    You win the internets all to yourself for the next 24 hours for that beauty. Damn tough crowd here at BJ. Damn tough…

    I am sooo stealing that line…

  66. 66.

    shelley matheis

    ‘I only watch FOX News.’

    And I’m sure the other News networks are profoundly grateful.

  67. 67.

    anonevent

    @A Mom Anon: I think people like this need to join the military, the police force, or something larger than themselves. These people have zero sense of perspective. I had to deal with a number of hurricanes when I was in the Navy, and being worried about other people’s lives shows this crap to be pointless.

  68. 68.

    PeopleAreNoDamnGood

    @Ash Can:

    If I were betting with my own money, I’d wager that Letterman arranged the demonstration and had those cheesy barricades brought in too.

    I think he is laughing his ass off at this point.

    The guy did not get a $32m/yr job without knowing how to pull off a publicity stunt.

  69. 69.

    YellowJournalism

    I was going to post Joshua Norton’s quote again and declare it full of win, but others have already done it for me.

    I loved the soshulism guy, especially when he started doing the stereotypical sassy head bob move to the black woman standing in front of him without hearing a damn thing she was trying to say.

  71. 71.

    AhabTRuler

    I think people like this need to join the military, the police force

    Ah, no.

    or something larger than themselves

    Please don’t say religion…please don’t say religion.

  72. 72.

    asiangrrlMN

    I made a vow during the Palin rallies not to watch this garbage, and I have kept to that vow throughout the tea-baggin’ and other hate-fests. I will not watch this hypocritical crap. I think I can supply what they said in the privacy of my own mind.

  73. 73.

    ethan salto

    @jenniebee:

    If you think it was CBS, you’re not a close Letterman observer (which I am, sadly). His detail about reflecting on the matter while watching Friday’s NewsHour is remarkably specific, genuine, and consistent with his media-watching patterns (we know, for example, that he also likes the Beeb and Olbermann). He’s also reflexively self-critical. This wasn’t out of character for him at all.

    Also, he’s a gigantic presence on the Eye — a huge moneymaker and a network-making talent that keeps CBS from being the AARP network. He’s been viciously anti-Bush, anti-McCain and anti-Cheney in the last few years, and there was no CBS intervention. There certainly could have been (CBS’ CEO has a history of donating to Democrats).

    Finally, he’s literally in contract negotiations for an extension as I type this, not a time at which CBS would feel comfortable getting involved.

    Wow, I’m a huge nerd.

  74. 74.

    PeopleAreNoDamnGood

    the very first thing he said to his audience was a rib for those rallying: “Now when I call your name, please come forward and pick up your apology. [Laughter, applause] I wanna get through this as quickly as possibly so you folks can get to the ‘Fire Dave Rally.’ [Cheering] It’s nice that people hate me who are no longer just part of my immediate family. My son, he’s telling everybody at school that his father is Conan!” He later touched on his apology to Palin for making a distasteful joke about her daughter Bristol having sex with Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez. Many believed the joke was actually aimed at her 14-year-old daughter Willow and were appalled. Palin eventually accepted an apology from Letterman. “The good news is Sarah Palin has accepted my apology. She also accepted a $500 gift certificate from Lens Crafters. I thought that was a nice touch,” he said. “I tell you, I was quite nervous about this whole thing, and I was really nervous about an apology to Sarah Palin, so when I did get my confidence up and my nerves to settle down, I rehearsed by apologizing to Tina Fey. That helped. That was a big help. [Applause]”

    Dave is clearly worried here. Worried that he didn’t pimp the original insult harder and get more mileage out of this thing, that is.

    Dave=win.

  75. 75.

    gnomedad

    @Comrade Darkness:

    I know what it means in German (decoration)… is that close?

    That was a gag in the Billy Wilder film “One, Two, Three”.

    Also, I didn’t know “Jewish” was a language.

  76. 76.

    Ken

    @asiangrrlMN – I generally feel the same way – I don’t have time for this nonsense. However, with some trepidation, I did click on the video… funniest goddamn thing I’ve seen in a long time. Letterman’s producers had to have been behind it.

  77. 77.

    JenJen

    @me: I mean, WTF?

    Not only do I get a Teabagger/Palin Rally vibe from this crowd, I also get a very, very heavy PUMA vibe. It’s not just me, right?

    “He has a bastard son and a slut wife! He will rape you with his mouth! He is a child abuser and a verbal pedophile!”

    Pardon my language, but seriously, fuck you, lady. Fuck you right in your ear.

  78. 78.

    Zifnab

    @Ash Can:

    All right, I call bullshit. Letterman’s producers organized this protest themselves using studio extras, to get laff-riot footage for tonight’s show and to punk Fox News in the process, for yet more laff-riot footage for tomorrow’s show.

    Nah, this is a coup by Daily Show to get back in the papers again. I bet you anything if you look hard enough you’ll see Jason Jones prodding the herd with a sharpened stick.

  79. 79.

    anonevent

    @AhabTRuler: Religion won’t work because it doesn’t ask anything of them. I was trying to think of something that would show them how small and petty they were being.

  80. 80.

    thereisnorule6

    the two guys making out at the end of the clip are Richard and Sal from the Howard Stern show.

  82. 82.

    asiangrrlMN

    @Ken: I watched. I didn’t find it funny. I found it very sad. Sniff. I gotta see the Grinch, though. Wow. She’s just pathetic.

    Of course, Leno told his own joke about Bristol, the “class act” that he is.

    I am ashamed to be of the same species and gender as these women.

  83. 83.

    Skepticat

    @ anonevent—

    I was trying to think of something that would show them how small and petty they were being.

    The problem is that they’re incapable of seeing that. Or much of anything else beyond their own small worlds.

  84. 84.

    JK

    These protesters are nothing but a bunch of knuckle dragging neanderthals.

    Sarah Palin can go to hell. She’s a clueless, goddamn moron who blew Letterman’s jokes completely out of proportion to raise money for her political action committee. She’s a walking punchline who doesn’t know when to shut the hell up. I’ll take David Letterman any day of the week over this vapid, obnoxious twit from Wasilla.

  85. 85.

    mapaghimagsik

    You’re a monster, Mr. Grinch.
    Your heart’s an empty hole.
    Your brain is full of spiders,
    You’ve got garlic in your soul.
    Mr. Grinch.

    It really does say it all.

  86. 86.

    shoutingattherain

    @asiangrrlMN

    I am ashamed to be of the same species and gender as these women.

    Never mind that. I’m ashamed just being on the same planet with these people.

  88. 88.

    Dream On

    I call BS on this rally. Great publicity for Dave, and funny. It’s gotta be fake.

    Did one guy just say “poi-vort”?

  89. 89.

    monkeyboy

    These are the sort of people that get so worked up that they spit on liberals because everybody knows that liberals spit on US soldiers.

  92. 92.

    lovethebomb

    Ya know what is so interesting about the Palin response to the Letterman joke was that they introduced into the public mind the visual image and concept of a 14 year old girl being raped. Nothing in Letterman’s joke suggested rape or that it was the 14 yr old, since it obviously refered to the knocked up daughter. So, consider, the Palins themselves are the sick perverts who want the public to imagine the rape of a 14 yr old girl, when Dave was riffing off their own daughter’s teenage pregnancy. Going further, they then accuse Letterman of child molestation. They are the ones who owe an apology.

    Yet owing to the unintended indeterminancy of language, this fake umbrage has raised the spector of their daughter’s abstinence only unwed teen pregnancy to yet further public awareness and so they lose, except for the “my team” us/them winger crowd. Dave wins.

  95. 95.

    polyorchnid octopunch

    I got a really big kick out of the woman saying they should “close the border, just seal it for twenty years and see how the economy comes back” yeah, that’ll work, right up until you run out of oil.

    And it burns burns burns….

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