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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Open Thread

Open Thread

by John Cole|  June 25, 20094:09 pm| 111 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads

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I’ve had enough of this crap. I’m out to play with the dog. Behave.

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Previous Post: « These People Are Killing Me
Next Post: The king of pop is dead »

Reader Interactions

111Comments

  1. 1.

    tot

    June 25, 2009 at 4:12 pm

    Show us on the doll where America invaded your territory.

  2. 2.

    chopper

    June 25, 2009 at 4:13 pm

    time warner blows. that is all.

  3. 3.

    mt

    June 25, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    The tadpoles I bought for my aquarium are too big.

  4. 4.

    cleek

    June 25, 2009 at 4:21 pm

    this just in: for a 38 year-old, 1AM is too late to be out on a Wednesday night. especially at a place that sells Guinness by the quart. for $3.

  5. 5.

    Ash

    June 25, 2009 at 4:26 pm

    According to GOPolitico, it’s dangerous for Obama to be a faithful husband who can cook and be a role model for his children. Umurikans just don’t like dudes like that. Apparently.

    They also say everyone hated Mittens Romney because he is a “spectacularly good-looking man.”

    Seriously.

  6. 6.

    Incertus

    June 25, 2009 at 4:29 pm

    I’m trying to lighten the mood here–in Australia, wallabys eat opium poppies and make crop circles as a result.

  7. 7.

    Colonel Danite

    June 25, 2009 at 4:29 pm

    Guinness for $3 a quart? Where is this place and how long will it take me to get there from LA?

  8. 8.

    Brick Oven Bill

    June 25, 2009 at 4:30 pm

    The car sounded like it has got a puncture in the tire. But it was not a leak, it was a big rattlesnake. So it is there hissing at me and I want to get it out of the garage. First rocks are thrown and that doesn’t work. Then a pack of firecrackers. Still this thing is there hissing from behind a bunch of paint cans. Then the water hose. Then it stopped hissing and I can’t seem to find it and did not see it go anywhere.

    So I wonder, do rattlesnakes get tired of rattling, is it gone, or is this thing pissed and waiting to bite me? This is a big snake.

  9. 9.

    Martin

    June 25, 2009 at 4:32 pm

    So I wonder, do rattlesnakes get tired of rattling, is it gone, or is this thing pissed and waiting to bite me? This is a big snake.

    It’s lonely. Try kissing it. Eyes shut – snakes are self-conscious.

  10. 10.

    WereBear

    June 25, 2009 at 4:37 pm

    It’s a gorgeous day in the Adirondack Mountains, our new kitten is becoming even more cuddly, and I Kindled myself.

    Great way to approach the weekend! My best to all.

  11. 11.

    Martin

    June 25, 2009 at 4:38 pm

    Oh, and I’m increasingly coming to the conclusion that some adult needs to come to California and send the Republicans to their room in order for any kind of budget solution to happen. Republicans are just voting against everything now.

  12. 12.

    Brick Oven Bill

    June 25, 2009 at 4:38 pm

    Heading down to town, if you don’t hear from me again, bye Laura W. Your artwork is very beautiful.

  13. 13.

    R-Jud

    June 25, 2009 at 4:41 pm

    Spoke to my Dad tonight. We are heading over for a visit next week.

    Me: So what do you have planned for us?
    Dad: Croquet, swimming, maybe a hike on the AT.
    Me: (long pause) You haven’t been paying attention to the news, have you?
    Dad: Huh?

  14. 14.

    The Saff

    June 25, 2009 at 4:45 pm

    our new kitten is becoming even more cuddly

    Kittens rule!

    It will be a year next Tuesday that we unexpectedly rescued a 3-4 week old kitten. Hobbes now runs the show at our house. His latest trick is walking on top of the banister that runs the length of our loft (at the wall end, it’s about 10 feet down to the floor). He’s quite proud of himself.

  15. 15.

    Comrade Stuck

    June 25, 2009 at 4:52 pm

    @Brick Oven Bill:

    . Then it stopped hissing and I can’t seem to find it and did not see it go anywhere.

    Man I hate it when that happens. Is your insurance paid up BoB?

  16. 16.

    Ash Can

    June 25, 2009 at 4:53 pm

    @Brick Oven Bill: The rattlesnake went to tell its friends at PETA on you. By the time you get back from town they’ll be picketing your house and will have sheep grazing in your front yard, cows out back, chickens in your kitchen, and horses in your living room playing the piano and singing. I suggest staying in town.

  17. 17.

    demkat620

    June 25, 2009 at 5:05 pm

    @Brick Oven Bill: BOB, call a professional.

    And remember, the head is the dangerous part.

  18. 18.

    Maurs

    June 25, 2009 at 5:06 pm

    OT – Michael Jackson taken by ambulance to hospital in cardiac arrest. Front page story on TMZ.com

  19. 19.

    MikeJ

    June 25, 2009 at 5:10 pm

    in Australia, wallabys eat opium poppies and make crop circles as a result.

    The hed on that story, “Stoned wallabies make crop circles” looks like a mnemonic for something, but I’m not sure what.

    I’ll go ask lovely Yvonne now that the neighbors have actually persuaded her to shut her window.

  20. 20.

    LD50

    June 25, 2009 at 5:11 pm

    Ehh, why didn’t you get something useful, like storm windows, or a nice pipe organ? I’m thirsty! Ew, what smells like mustard? There sure a lot of ugly people in your neighborhood. Oh! Look at that one. Ow, my glaucoma just got worse. The president is a Demmycrat!

  21. 21.

    PeopleAreNoDamnGood

    June 25, 2009 at 5:12 pm

    @Brick Oven Bill:

    What are you, the freakin Unibomber?

  22. 22.

    Colette

    June 25, 2009 at 5:16 pm

    @Ash:

    They also say everyone hated Mittens Romney because he is a “spectacularly good-looking man.”

    EW! Ew ew ew ew ew. I would find any random waxwork at Madame Tussaud’s more attractive than that shirt stuffed full of smug.

    Also, ew.

  23. 23.

    JenJen

    June 25, 2009 at 5:16 pm

    @Maurs:

    OT – Michael Jackson taken by ambulance to hospital in cardiac arrest. Front page story on TMZ.com

    Wha…? For reals? Is it… Bad?! Shamoy!

    (sorry, sorry, couldn’t resist, I’m 12 years old, I know)

  24. 24.

    The Moar You Know

    June 25, 2009 at 5:17 pm

    @Brick Oven Bill: Glenn Beck would set his garage on fire and eat the well-done remains of the snake.

    Proceed accordingly.

  25. 25.

    demkat620

    June 25, 2009 at 5:23 pm

    How does this woman get out of bed in the morning?

    Dana Perino today

    While I am not able to explain, I do think I know the answer to all of this: Elect more women. No woman I know has the time for such trysts, nor do I know any who say the desire one. They’re too busy trying to keep all the plates spinning at home, at work, and at the gym to make sure none fall and break.

    That just…um..okay…

  26. 26.

    The Sphynx

    June 25, 2009 at 5:24 pm

    @The Moar You Know:

    Snake is actually really tasty

  27. 27.

    harlana pepper

    June 25, 2009 at 5:37 pm

    So Sanford absolutely refuses to resign. So much for the hand-wringing. Still feeling charitable?

  28. 28.

    binzinerator

    June 25, 2009 at 5:42 pm

    Can dogs read?

    Well, if they can speak why not read?

    Scientists have made some progress in their study of this important subject: They’ve learned why dogs, and other animals, have rather poor pronunciation and, for example, completely botch consonants. They “don’t use their tongues and lips very well, and that makes it difficult for them to match many of the sounds that their human partners make,” Lucas says.

    Sounds like Astro’s ‘ruh-roh’ was a pretty good guess as to how it would sound if dogs could speak.

  29. 29.

    JenJen

    June 25, 2009 at 5:43 pm

    So, TMZ says Michael Jackson had died.

    http://www.tmz.com/2009/06/25/michael-jackson-dies-chat/

    Wow. I guess it really was bad.

  30. 30.

    Maurs

    June 25, 2009 at 5:43 pm

    From TMZ: Michael Jackson dead

  31. 31.

    The Moar You Know

    June 25, 2009 at 5:48 pm

    Still feeling charitable?

    @harlana pepper: To him, no. To his wife and kids and mistress, more so than ever as I watch them get dragged through the meatgrinder that is our purient media.

    Because they’re not the point, and what Sanford does with his penis is not the point. Sanford leaving the state for ten days without telling anyone is the point, but nobody seems to give a shit about that, preferring to giggle it up like girls in a junior high school bathroom.

    Plus, think it through – this guy is going to hang around like a dead, rotting albatross for 18 months? Thank you, Jeebus.

  32. 32.

    John Cole

    June 25, 2009 at 5:48 pm

    @harlana pepper: I don’t think people should be forced from office for having an affair. You think he has violated the terms of his office, bring it.

  33. 33.

    The Moar You Know

    June 25, 2009 at 5:49 pm

    Farrah and Michael Jackson dead on the same day. I want to both mourn my youth and throw a party.

  34. 34.

    RememberNovember

    June 25, 2009 at 5:50 pm

    Roger Ebert posted a great de-construction of Bill O that’s worth reading and passing on.

    link:

  35. 35.

    gwangung

    June 25, 2009 at 5:51 pm

    I don’t think people should be forced from office for having an affair. You think he has violated the terms of his office, bring it.

    Personally, abandoning the office is kinda irresponsible, no matter how you look at it. I’d be comfortable with any legal repercussions from that.

  36. 36.

    Laura W

    June 25, 2009 at 5:52 pm

    @Brick Oven Bill:

    Heading down to town, if you don’t hear from me again, bye Laura W. Your artwork is very beautiful.

    I shan’t draw another happy breath until I learn of your safe return, Bill.
    You fucking semi-lovable loon.

  37. 37.

    binzinerator

    June 25, 2009 at 5:53 pm

    @harlana pepper:

    So Sanford absolutely refuses to resign.

    Yeah didn’t see that one coming did we? ; )

    When he didn’t offer his resignation I thought he might have been thinking he’s still got a chance for 2012.

    I think he’s going to try to run in 2012. He’ll tell us Jesus said “we’re good” so it’ll can only be petty and mean-spirited and intolerant if that’s not good for the rest of ya.

  38. 38.

    RememberNovember

    June 25, 2009 at 5:56 pm

    bah, didnt like my tags,
    here it is

    http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/2009/06/the_oreilly_procedure.html

  39. 39.

    Marked Hoosier

    June 25, 2009 at 5:59 pm

    I can’t believe Glen Beck, Michelle Bachman, etc. are really attacking the Census. Really?!?

    The crazy right is certifiable…

    When Census workers are shot, do you think Beck or Bachman will feel any remorse?

  40. 40.

    JK

    June 25, 2009 at 6:00 pm

    Musical Tribute to Mark Sanford

    I’ve Just Seen a Face – The Beatles
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbKGsEK_T9g

    Lay Lady Lay – Bob Dylan
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfF0uHekcc8&feature=related

    Why Does Love Got To Be So Bad – Derek and The Dominos
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9wTsn3zqx4

  41. 41.

    Punchy

    June 25, 2009 at 6:00 pm

    Michael Jackson just died

  42. 42.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    June 25, 2009 at 6:01 pm

    @The Moar You Know: If he is dead, I mourn the awesomely talented child and young man he once was. He fucked up his life a lot in recent decades, and there’s the lingering taint of pedophilia hanging over him as well, but I just don’t feel like partying. He was broken as a child and never recovered.

  43. 43.

    Lee from NC

    June 25, 2009 at 6:03 pm

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse:

    Exactly how I feel about it as well. Well put.

  44. 44.

    Martin

    June 25, 2009 at 6:04 pm

    I don’t think people should be forced from office for having an affair.

    But those were Sanfords rules. I think one of the big disconnects on this issue is whose morality we’re all to be held to. John Cole says that Sanford shouldn’t be held to Cole’s morality. I agree. Whose morality should he be held to?

    Sanford wants to hold ALL other people to Sanford’s morality, all but himself. That’s completely the opposite of how it should work. As soon as Sanford thinks someone else should step down from office, those become the rules that should be ascribed to Sanford. What’s more, Sanford voted to legislate that attitude.

    As soon as these assholes drop their holier than thou rules (and supporting legislation), I’ll agree that a wandering dick doesn’t deserve a resignation. Until that day, however…

  45. 45.

    Napoleon

    June 25, 2009 at 6:04 pm

    @Punchy:

    No official report that he is dead, that is the unofficial report that he is dead. Heart attack.

  46. 46.

    me

    June 25, 2009 at 6:07 pm

    Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson. That’s three.

  47. 47.

    Comrade Stuck

    June 25, 2009 at 6:08 pm

    Was never a fan of neither Fawcett or Jackson, at least the adult one. But I’m about burnt on bad news overload of premature death and sorry ass politicians. I think it’s hi time to bring back the Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle who taught me how to laugh and to learn to stop worrying and love the bomb.

    Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat. :–)

  48. 48.

    binzinerator

    June 25, 2009 at 6:09 pm

    Yeah, ol’ ‘AT’ Marko was just going to BA to break it off. Honest.

    from TMZ:

    Carlos Soto, the owner of Guido’s Bar, says he’s seen Sanford and Maria Belen Chapur there several times over the last few months — most recently last week.
    .
    Soto says they were “all over each other” last week in his bar, “kissing, holding hands and drinking wine.”
    .
    Soto was impressed with Maria, saying she has “un cuerpazo'” — translation: a banging body.

    I do believe this will earn Sanford some secret (and not-so-secret) admiration among many males of his base. And more secretly so, among more women in his base than one may think.

  49. 49.

    Martin

    June 25, 2009 at 6:09 pm

    @me:

    Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson. That’s three.

    My God, the limits Obama will go to…

  50. 50.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    June 25, 2009 at 6:09 pm

    The LA Times blog is reporting that Jackson is in a coma.

  51. 51.

    LD50

    June 25, 2009 at 6:10 pm

    When Census workers are shot, do you think Beck or Bachman will feel any remorse?

    I assume that’s a rhetorical question.

  52. 52.

    Wile E. Quixote

    June 25, 2009 at 6:10 pm

    Man, first Farrah Fawcett, who I ogled as a newly pubescent teen back in the late 1970s and now Michael Jackson, who, say what you will about his personal life, was a pop genius who not only broke the MTV color barrier (Well Bill Paley had a bit to do with it too) but who also saved the recording industry in the early 1980s. What a miserable day.

  53. 53.

    JenJen

    June 25, 2009 at 6:12 pm

    @Wile E. Quixote: What a miserable day, indeed. Anyone else feeling just a little bit older today?

    RIP, Farrah and Michael. American icons, both of them, really.

  54. 54.

    Wile E. Quixote

    June 25, 2009 at 6:13 pm

    @Comrade Stuck

    Was never a fan of neither Fawcett or Jackson, at least the adult one. But I’m about burnt on bad news overload of premature death and sorry ass politicians.

    Yeah, me too, why can’t we get some happy news, like say news about the premature deaths of sorry-ass politicians?

  55. 55.

    JK

    June 25, 2009 at 6:13 pm

    If you live by the sword, you should die by the sword. Sanford and Ensign should both resign. These hypocritical pricks never contemplated cutting other politicians slack for scandals so fuck them both and run them out of town.

  56. 56.

    cs

    June 25, 2009 at 6:14 pm

    So I was in Figueira, Portugal on the beach with a Portuguese friend. There was a sign like the above, only a bit stricter, prohibiting dogs on the beach. Directly underneath the sign was a huge pile of dog poop.

    Looked at my friend, and he said “No one’s going to get arrested for having dogs on the beach. We’re a free country, unlike the US.”

  57. 57.

    Martin

    June 25, 2009 at 6:15 pm

    Yeah, me too, why can’t we get some happy news, like say news about the premature deaths of sorry-ass politicians?

    Look forward to how excited and relieved we’ll feel when BOB cheats garage snake death.

  58. 58.

    asiangrrlMN

    June 25, 2009 at 6:15 pm

    Michael Jackson just died, people. He was fifty. This is very weird.

    http://www.tmz.com/2009/06/25/michael-jackson-dies-death-dead-cardiac-arrest/

    I should amend and say that he’s been hospitalized and reported dead.

    Ok, ok, I didn’t read the other entries first. I’m still not taking it back.

    By the way, if I were an elected official, man, would the people hoot and holler. NOT married? Bi? Not monogamous? Teh horrors!

  59. 59.

    Jason

    June 25, 2009 at 6:16 pm

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse: hah. lingering taint of pedophilia. why is that funny I ask you. must be the private wake I am holding for mj

    mmmm taint

  60. 60.

    JK

    June 25, 2009 at 6:17 pm

    Jon Stewart nailed it again last night: “Sanford is a politician with a conservative mind and a liberal penis.”

  61. 61.

    mey

    June 25, 2009 at 6:18 pm

    Yeah, MJ dying is tripping me out a little.

  62. 62.

    Elie

    June 25, 2009 at 6:20 pm

    RIP Farrah and Michael Jackson — both knew the highs and the lows of celebrity — may each be at peace

    As for Governor Sanford, according to Politico — the dude was planning for a TEN day absence from his job to go hang out in Argentina. Taking into consideration that his office has lied and covered up about his whereabouts and that he did not hand off the duties of his office to anyone – I consider his reckless butt to be TOAST.

    The resignation should be about THIS — not his affair. There are already calls from other Republican state leaders for his resignation. To me the only bet is when not if.

  63. 63.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    June 25, 2009 at 6:20 pm

    My Mum and Dad would have been 85 and 84 respectively today. And I found out just a few hours ago that the client who’s been providing 80% of my income may have little or nothing for me until the new year, and even that isn’t guaranteed. I have another couple of clients, some savings and some other prospects to carry me through a few more months, so things aren’t grim, but it’s sobering. (Emergency funds, folks. I’m not kidding. Aim for at least 6 months of bare bones expenses, if not 12. Pay less on consumer debt to get this nut together. If you’re not earning a lot to begin with, this may seem an impossible goal, but put away what you can.)

    Yeah, this could be a better day. But at least I’m having it.

  64. 64.

    asiangrrlMN

    June 25, 2009 at 6:21 pm

    P.S. B.O.B., as much as you annoy the shit out of me, please have a professional take care of the snake.

    Ah, shit, Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse. I’m sorry that times are so tough for you. Good vibes coming your way.

  65. 65.

    KaffeeMeister

    June 25, 2009 at 6:21 pm

    Totally OT:

    Apparently, Michael Jackson is in a coma at UCLA Medical.

  66. 66.

    cleek

    June 25, 2009 at 6:21 pm

    @Colonel Danite:

    the Pour House, Raleigh NC. on Weds., you buy the empty 32 oz mug for $4, once. and you can fill it with any beer for $3. 30 beers on tap. plus you can reuse the same mug week after week. this is a dangerous place.

  67. 67.

    linda

    June 25, 2009 at 6:22 pm

    latimes has now confirmed that jackson has died.

    goddamn.

  68. 68.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    June 25, 2009 at 6:22 pm

    OK, CBS news and LA Times are reporting that Jackson is dead after briefly being in a coma (says my radio station).

  69. 69.

    cleek

    June 25, 2009 at 6:23 pm

    Apparently, Michael Jackson is in a coma at UCLA Medical.

    MSNBC.com says he has died.

  70. 70.

    linda

    June 25, 2009 at 6:24 pm

    it’s front page of the latimes.

    http://www.latimes.com/

  71. 71.

    Laura W

    June 25, 2009 at 6:25 pm

    @Martin:

    My God, the limits Obama will go to…

    I’m thinking Letterman, frankly.

  72. 72.

    Wile E. Quixote

    June 25, 2009 at 6:28 pm

    @Martin

    @Wile E. Quixote

    Yeah, me too, why can’t we get some happy news, like say news about the premature deaths of sorry-ass politicians?

    Look forward to how excited and relieved we’ll feel when BOB cheats garage snake death.

    Isn’t “Garage Snake Death” the new single by the Armchair Eberts?

  73. 73.

    binzinerator

    June 25, 2009 at 6:29 pm

    @linda:

    latimes has now confirmed that jackson has died.

    Aw shit. I saw that over at TMZ and hoped it was gossip rag overreach. Damn.

  74. 74.

    demimondian

    June 25, 2009 at 6:33 pm

    @Elie: Yup. This is the thing which should have him out — that’s gross neglect of his responsibilities to the state.

  75. 75.

    Jon H

    June 25, 2009 at 6:34 pm

    Farrah and Michael on the same day?

    I question the timing.

  76. 76.

    asiangrrlMN

    June 25, 2009 at 6:35 pm

    @Wile E. Quixote:

    Isn’t “Garage Snake Death” the new single by the Armchair Eberts?

    Thanks for the laugh. I desperately needed that.

  77. 77.

    Jon H

    June 25, 2009 at 6:36 pm

    At least Michael Jackson’s kids will be able to get rid of the goddamn masks now and maybe live a somewhat more normal life.

  78. 78.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    June 25, 2009 at 6:39 pm

    @demimondian: Absolutely. I don’t care who he’s sleeping with. That’s his business but leaving the country without letting anyone know where he went is inexecusable. I don’t think anyone would have thought twice about this mess if he had turned the reigns over to the Lt Gov while he was gone. He should resign or be thrown out.

  79. 79.

    Adam

    June 25, 2009 at 6:42 pm

    HAY GAIZ MICHAEL JACKSON DIED

  80. 80.

    Catsy

    June 25, 2009 at 6:43 pm

    Holy crap, Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett?

    The media is going to be in a frenzy, what with two famous white women dying in the same day.

  81. 81.

    Cat Lady

    June 25, 2009 at 6:43 pm

    Bad day for celebrity. Hope no one here was a pop icon of the 70’s and 80’s. If so, it was nice talkin’ to ya.

  82. 82.

    Adam

    June 25, 2009 at 6:43 pm

    You knew once Farrah died, Michael wasn’t going to be far behind…

  83. 83.

    kay

    June 25, 2009 at 6:45 pm

    @Elie:

    The deal breaker is using public funds for a two day stay ahead of the delegation on a trade junket to Argentina.

    He’s gotta resign. He’s a fiscal conservative who spent 2 grand of taxpayer money on a luxury hotel while meeting with his mistress, which he now promises to repay, but only after he was caught.

    He’s done.

  84. 84.

    harlana pepper

    June 25, 2009 at 6:46 pm

    @The Moar You Know: If you had read some of my previous posts on the Sanford affair, you would have understood my point (same as yours) instead of jumping to the conclusion that I’m a vicious little giggling, gossiping school girl. You’re out of bounds

  85. 85.

    Brachiator

    June 25, 2009 at 6:47 pm

    @me:

    Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson. That’s three.

    This is a bit of an urban legend. It’s more that the average person only knows three notable people out of the many who die in a recent period of time.

    That said, these were people notable in American and world culture. The LA Times had a very nice piece on Ed McMahon and how tough it is to be a good second banana (Ed McMahon: A salute to the king of sidekicks).

    Ed and Johnny were “as close as two non-married people can be,” as McMahon wrote in his book, “Here’s Johnny: Memories of Johnny Carson, ‘The Tonight Show’ and 46 Years of Friendship.” McMahon, who was only two years older than Carson, began working as his announcer in 1957 on the game show “Who Do You Trust?” and accompanied him to “The Tonight Show” in 1962, where they kept on for 30 years.

    A strange and sad news day.

  86. 86.

    asiangrrlMN

    June 25, 2009 at 6:47 pm

    Don’t forget Ed McMahon.

  87. 87.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    June 25, 2009 at 6:47 pm

    @JK: My musical tribute to Sanford would be some Hank Williams.

  88. 88.

    dbrown

    June 25, 2009 at 6:52 pm

    I never felt anything but pity for Jackson. He never had the chance to grow up and live life as anything but a confused, frighten child. It is a tragedy that he passed away so young and never had a chance to grow up and watch his own children grow and enjoy life. Terrible.

  89. 89.

    harlana pepper

    June 25, 2009 at 6:55 pm

    And Mr. Fiscal Conservative (no matter how hard you fuck the poor in the process) was using taxpayer funds to go and fuck his mistress in the fucking pink moonlight or whatever the fuck drivel that simpering, privileged little prick wrote.

  90. 90.

    harlana pepper

    June 25, 2009 at 6:57 pm

    Yes, Michael Jackson is someone I can feel sympathy for.

  91. 91.

    kay

    June 25, 2009 at 6:58 pm

    @harlana pepper:

    I feel vindicated. I thought the press conference was self-indulgent theater.

  92. 92.

    Jon H

    June 25, 2009 at 6:58 pm

    @Brachiator: “This is a bit of an urban legend. It’s more that the average person only knows three notable people out of the many who die in a recent period of time.”

    Well, no, it’s confirmation bias. Because of the saying, you _notice_ when three famous people die in close succession, so it seems significant. You don’t notice when one or two famous people die all by their lonesome.

  93. 93.

    CletusBleaker

    June 25, 2009 at 7:02 pm

    John:

    What a great pic!! I can’t stop chuckling.

    Is keeping me from thinking about the deaths of 2 icons.

    Mr. 55

  94. 94.

    Elroy's Lunch

    June 25, 2009 at 7:05 pm

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    I’m very sorry to hear about your predicament. I hope that things turn out well for you soon. And I hope you can keep your internet connection going because it would be a shame to lose your contributions to the BJ threads.

  95. 95.

    Jon H

    June 25, 2009 at 7:06 pm

    @dbrown: “I never felt anything but pity for Jackson. He never had the chance to grow up and live life as anything but a confused, frighten child. It is a tragedy that he passed away so young and never had a chance to grow up and watch his own children grow and enjoy life. Terrible.”

    I feel bad for his kids. They’ll have to deal with the hassles of fame and status of being Michael Jackson’s kids, but I doubt they’ll inherit a penny. Jackson’s creditors will likely have all his assets in court forever. And I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t have any life insurance.

    Jackson’s been pretty much broke for ages, and was preparing for an extended series of concerts in London that might have helped.

  96. 96.

    qwerty42

    June 25, 2009 at 7:07 pm

    BOB, I don’t know where you live — if it were the lower south, and it were a diamondback, I’d call a pro. the snake might feel safe under the car, but I remember a newspaper report in Savannah when the mechanic found a copperhead curled up in the engine well, so …
    Oh, is there a lot of brush around your house — maybe technically called “shrubs”?
    good luck.

  97. 97.

    ScreaminginAtlanta

    June 25, 2009 at 7:11 pm

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse: I feel for you – I have a similar situation coming up. Sending psychic support your way, and also thanks for the very good advice about putting away survival funds. A big psychic wave of support from me to you.

  98. 98.

    Jon H

    June 25, 2009 at 7:12 pm

    @kay: “The deal breaker is using public funds for a two day stay ahead of the delegation on a trade junket to Argentina.
    He’s gotta resign. He’s a fiscal conservative who spent 2 grand of taxpayer money on a luxury hotel while meeting with his mistress, which he now promises to repay, but only after he was caught.”

    What’s more, the dude’s family owns a 3,000 acre historic plantation in SC, complete with white lawn jockey on the gatepost.

  99. 99.

    Dennis-SGMM

    June 25, 2009 at 7:16 pm

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse:
    Damn. My family and I are facing a severe curtailment in our income largely because the California legislature is batshit insane.
    My wife was born in Juarez and I hale from a long line of poor people so we both know the drill already. You seem to have provided yourself a cushion to help you ride out these sorry times. Good thinking! At 61 (My own late parents would have been 89 this year) I have ridden out enough downturns to last me a lifetime. That neither political party seems interested in ending the boom-and-bust cycle it to their everlasting shame.
    My heart goes out to those who have no reserves, no prospects and who will soon know, if they don’t already, the intimate humiliations of being broke.

  100. 100.

    Brachiator

    June 25, 2009 at 7:20 pm

    @Jon H:

    Well, no, it’s confirmation bias. Because of the saying, you notice when three famous people die in close succession, so it seems significant. You don’t notice when one or two famous people die all by their lonesome.

    No. It’s not quite the same as confirmation bias. For example, during this same period, Jean Dausset, who won the freaking Nobel Prize in Medicine died. Master musician Ali Akbar Khan died. Opera singer Betty Allen died.

    Jerri FitzGerald, the brave ER doctor who had to treat her own cancer while on an expedition at the South Pole died.

    These people don’t register as high on the pop culture meter as do Michael Jackson and even Ed McMahon. But they surely qualify as being famous.

  101. 101.

    kay

    June 25, 2009 at 7:22 pm

    @Jon H:

    I read his newspaper bio last night. I think it’s wild that he includes “working on a plantation” in his hard work’in blue-collar cred section.

    I just didn’t know people used the word “plantation” anymore. I was baffled by that. A…plantation? How old is this man?

    Now it makes sense. His family owns a slavery theme park? That’s charming.

  102. 102.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    June 25, 2009 at 7:37 pm

    Thanks for the sympathy and shared experiences, guys, and I hope ScreaminginAtlanta and Dennis-SGMM get through this, too.

    Now I’m off on my bike to do a little shopping. I’ll go a little further to the place with milk on for half price. :-)

  103. 103.

    Jon H

    June 25, 2009 at 7:50 pm

    @Brachiator: “These people don’t register as high on the pop culture meter as do Michael Jackson and even Ed McMahon. But they surely qualify as being famous.”

    I pretty much always figured the 3-deaths thing was Hollywood-centric. (Or Hollywood/New York/Nashville, at a stretch.)

    After all, papers all over the world have obituaries every day for people who are well-known to *some* extent.

  104. 104.

    LD50

    June 25, 2009 at 7:58 pm

    Should we start some kind of pool about what happened with BOB & his rattlesnake?

    I mean, if he never posts again, we’ll know what happened, but otherwise…

  105. 105.

    Steeplejack

    June 25, 2009 at 8:56 pm

    @Laura W:

    I shan’t draw another happy breath until I learn of your safe return, Bill.

    Golly, I didn’t know you could do Jane Austen, too. Sigh . . .

  106. 106.

    freelancer

    June 25, 2009 at 8:58 pm

    via Spencer Ackerman:

    Is there anyway we can petition Louisiana to secede? They’re one M4 carbine rifle away from the House of Representin’.

  107. 107.

    Steeplejack

    June 25, 2009 at 9:29 pm

    @Wile E. Quixote:

    Isn’t “Garage Snake Death” the new single by the Armchair Eberts?

    I loved their first two albums, but then they totally sold out.

    Edit: Although their concert album, Live at the Multiplex, was damn good. I particularly liked Pauline Kael’s 8-minute drum solo in the extended version of “Garage Snake Death.”

  108. 108.

    Brachiator

    June 25, 2009 at 11:19 pm

    @Jon H:

    I pretty much always figured the 3-deaths thing was Hollywood-centric. (Or Hollywood/New York/Nashville, at a stretch.)

    It was the Hollywood/New York connection that pretty much nailed the falseness of the 3-death rule. I live in Southern California and would read Daily Variety, the LA Times and the New York Times.

    You would regularly read the obits of people who once were extremely famous, who even continued to have some renown on Broadway, but not the movies or TV, and who no longer rated highly on the pop culture meter. Invariably, someone would mark the passing of two “famous” people without even realizing that several more worthy candidates were available as well.

    Also, when I’m in Hollywood, I easily note that tourists will wander along the starred Walk of Fame, and go “Who’s that?” many more times than they will say, “Look, there’s so and so,” even though presumably everyone who got a star was considered to be a noteworthy celebrity.

    Even stranger than the faux 3-death rule is the situation in which the sudden or unexpected death of a celebrity for some reason generates totally false rumors of a different celebrity’s death.

    It happened again today. I will not mention the celebrity’s name, but his publicist is busily denying rumors of his death in an accident.

  109. 109.

    Wile E. Quixote

    June 26, 2009 at 2:21 am

    @Steeplejack

    @Wile E. Quixote:
    Isn’t “Garage Snake Death” the new single by the Armchair Eberts?

    I loved their first two albums, but then they totally sold out.
    Edit: Although their concert album, Live at the Multiplex, was damn good. I particularly liked Pauline Kael’s 8-minute drum solo in the extended version of “Garage Snake Death.”

    I dunno, I think that Kael’s drumming lost a lot of its passion when she gave up smack and found Jesus.

  110. 110.

    tammanycall

    June 26, 2009 at 4:23 am

    I’m out to play with the dog.

    Tunch iz gunna git jellus…

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