Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

This really is a full service blog.

This blog will pay for itself.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

This fight is for everything.

Not all heroes wear capes.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”

You cannot shame the shameless.

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Battle won, war still ongoing.

Nothing worth doing is easy.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

I really should read my own blog.

Despite his magical powers, I don’t think Trump is thinking this through, to be honest.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

If you tweet it in all caps, that makes it true!

No one could have predicted…

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

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Open Thread (Tech-Idiot Edition)

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Bad Horse’s Filly linked to this earlier, but it deserves top-of-the-page status:

Boyfriend with Health Benefits

I see you checkin’ me
Out on the dance floor
I know you want me boy, but you got something I want more
See, these are troubled times
A bad economy
I got some health issues, and medicine, well it ain’t free

I don’t care about your diamond rings
I don’t need none of those fancy things
If you really wanna be my man
Boy, you gotta put me on your health care plan!

Let’s start a family
And you can be the boss
Just prove to me that you’ve got Aetna, Kaiser, or Blue Cross
I can’t afford a doctor
I need your MDC
When I get sick all I can do is go to WebMD
Well you don’t gotta kiss me
And I don’t need no hugs
Just gotta get a discount when I need prescription drugs!
I need a flu shot baby
I got a tricky knee
And I ain’t seen a dentist since September of two-thousand-three

I don’t care about your diamond rings
I don’t need none of those fancy things
If you really wanna be my man
Just let me get all up in your health-care plan

Wanna be my dependent, girl? / What you got? / I’m gonna break it down…

I hear you say you love me
I wanna know fo’ sho’
You gotta prove it ‘fore I put you on my PPO
‘Cuz my co-pays are modest
And girl you know that’s true
My pre-existing condition is I’m in love wit’ you
My coverage is extensive
They pin my policy
You want some Lasik, baby, I got full optometry
Shi-at-su massage — all day for you’n’me
Don’t sweat the payments, girl, it’s covered ‘cuz it’s therapy

Aaa-oooh! How much is your deductible / How much is your deductible / How much…
Want some acupuncture baby? How ’bout podiatry? I’ll get you braces, girl…

Thanks, BHF — the Spousal Unit and I both laughed so hard we almost injured ourselves!

Reader Interactions

7Comments

  2. 2.

    Darkrose

    The wife and I died laughing–especially because we frequently joke about how she really only married me for those state employee benefits.

  3. 3.

    2th&nayle

    What a hoot! Funny stuff….sorta. Used to have a gf wanted to get married real bad; tried to ply me with HER health care insurance. Told her that was real sweet and all, but what would happen if she lost her job? She, of course, said if that happened, she’d lose her coverage. I told her that since I was a veteran, that I already had good medical benefits, whether I had a job or not. I don’t think that was the answer she was looking for. But, she did stop talking about getting married after that. haha!
    Don’t get me wrong, nothing would make me happier than to see universal health care in this country. Personally though, I’d still go the VA one way or the other! I’ve always been very happy with the care I’ve received there. Besides that, there’s just something kind of comforting about being in the company of fellow veterans. Just sayin!

  4. 4.

    PurpleGirl

    LOL. I know some couples for whom health benefits were an aspect of when they got married. They would have married anyway but the timing definitely hinged on getting one of the spouses on the other’s insurance.

  5. 5.

    Michael

    And in other news from the fever swamps of Birther land…..

    http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2009/07/opponents-of-barack-obamas-presidency-claim-small-court-victory.html

    Perhaps because of that history, Orly Taitz, the lawyer who filed the current suit, was greatly cheered by Monday’s hearing. “He’s very determined to hear the case on the merits,” Taitz said, referring to the judge. “He stated, the country needs to know if Mr. Obama is legitimate, if he can legitimately stay in the White House.”
    That’s not quite the way Asst. U.S. Atty. David DeJute heard the judge’s comments. Thom Mrozek, a spokesman for the U.S. Attorney’s Office, said that “the judge did make a bunch of comments about having the matter correctly and thoroughly aired, once and if they got to the merits of the actual lawsuit, which was not the subject of today’s discussion.”

    Judicial extemporizing in the presence of pro se litigants (or idiot online pseudolawyers like Taitz) is always a mistake. It is always better to crush them like the psychotic insects they are by using the rules of procedure that real lawyers are bound to.

  6. 6.

    Violet

    This has me howling. I wish someone would play this for the Congressidiots who are deciding the future of our healthcare. If this is enough of an issue that people are making parody song/videos about it, clearly it’s something that needs addressing.

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