• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Bad news for Ron DeSantis is great news for America.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

Ron DeSantis, the grand wizard, oops, governor of FL

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

I wonder if trump will be tried as an adult.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

Bark louder, little dog.

Imperialist aggressors must be defeated, or the whole world loses.

Peak wingnut was a lie.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

Republicans don’t trust women.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

Usually wrong but never in doubt

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

Putin dreamed of ending NATO, and now it’s Finnish-ed.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

This fight is for everything.

Happy indictment week to all who celebrate!

Everyone is in a bubble, but some bubbles model reality far better than others!

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Republicans choose power over democracy, every day.

Chutkan laughs. Lauro sits back down.

Mobile Menu

  • Winnable House Races
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • Balloon Juice 2023 Pet Calendar (coming soon)
  • COVID-19 Coronavirus
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • War in Ukraine
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • 2021-22 Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Politics / How to lose an election

How to lose an election

by DougJ|  September 4, 20098:39 pm| 30 Comments

This post is in: Politics, Assholes

FacebookTweetEmail

Not since the choking on a chicken bone incident have things gone this haywire for a guy named Christie:

One of the things that made us most curious about this was that Christie’s negligence (he was driving the wrong direction on a one-way street) seemed so clear that we were wondering whether the accident didn’t lead to a lawsuit.

Earlier today, NJN asked Christie whether the accident had led to a lawsuit. And Christie said, point blank, no.

But a few hours after getting Christie’s flat denial, NJN found records of a 2004 suit, which appears to have been later settled out of court.

If you’ve ever read the book How Win Rig An Election, which I highly recommend to everyone, you’ll remember that the pivotal moment in the author’s career is when his candidate wins a big New Jersey race by discovering records that his opponent had committed a nasty traffic infraction years ago.

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « Friday Night Open Thread
Next Post: Yet Another Friday Night Open Thread »

Reader Interactions

30Comments

  1. 1.

    General Winfield Stuck

    September 4, 2009 at 8:52 pm

    Here is my token comment Dougj. Virgin threads are bad for bidness.

  2. 2.

    MoeLarryAndJesus

    September 4, 2009 at 8:53 pm

    Sometimes I think that there must be a Republican somewhere that isn’t a lying douchebag. But it has been a long time since I’ve seen evidence supporting that thought.

    It’s very possible that non-douchebag Republicans have gone the way of the dodo.

  3. 3.

    DougJ

    September 4, 2009 at 8:58 pm

    Here is my token comment Dougj. Virgin threads are bad for bidness.

    Thank you.

  4. 4.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    September 4, 2009 at 9:02 pm

    Wow someone appointed by the Former Cheerleader turns out to be a dirtbag. No one could have known.

  5. 5.

    Hypatia

    September 4, 2009 at 9:16 pm

    He wasn’t issued a ticket and the officer even drove him to his next appointment. According to TPM.

    Isn’t it great when the police DO protect and serve? Now if we could just get them to protect and serve the little guy.

  6. 6.

    Linkmeister

    September 4, 2009 at 9:26 pm

    “chicken bone incident?”

  7. 7.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    September 4, 2009 at 9:35 pm

    Well, Clinton got a blowjob, so Democrats are just as bad. So vote Republican. Also.

  8. 8.

    DougJ

    September 4, 2009 at 9:39 pm

    @Linkmeister
    Link

  9. 9.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    September 4, 2009 at 9:47 pm

    Personally, I’d be proud to vote for a candidate who drove the wrong way down a one-way street. That takes nerve. Guts. An unflinching willingness to play by his own rules. Not content to sit there and be spoon-fed traffic regulations by some armchair Brownshirt in City Hall, he strikes out on his own and does what he thinks is right. That’s the kind of leadership it takes to defeat terrorism. The kind of steely resolve you have to have if you’re going to try and cut taxes over Nancy Pelosi’s vociferous objections.

    I think Christie should run for President in 2012. In 2012, America won’t survive 4 more years of Obamania. Assuming we survive the 3 years necessary to make it to 2012, that is.

  10. 10.

    Cat Lady

    September 4, 2009 at 9:49 pm

    @MoeLarryAndJesus:

    Republicans were lying douchebags in the good old days of Nixon. Now they’re Insane Clown Douchenozzles.

  11. 11.

    Linkmeister

    September 4, 2009 at 9:53 pm

    @DougJ: Ah. Well, I don’t follow the NBA at all, so that’s my excuse and I’m stickin’ to it. ;)

  12. 12.

    Bubblegum Tate

    September 4, 2009 at 9:54 pm

    How Win Rig An Election

    Great book. I particularly liked the author’s statement on the “both sides do it!” argument regarding dirty politics: Yeah, both sides do it, but the Democrats are like a JV team and the Republicans are Olympians

  13. 13.

    beltane

    September 4, 2009 at 10:02 pm

    Christie sounds like a real scumbag, even by New Jersey standards. By the time election day rolls around we’ll find out that he has four different wives in three different stats and that all of them are meth dealers.

  14. 14.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    September 4, 2009 at 10:10 pm

    @beltane:

    Definitely the best Republican candidate for 2012. By far the cleanest record.

  15. 15.

    someguy

    September 4, 2009 at 10:10 pm

    I dunno. I think people should vote against him because he’s a moral degenerate Republican scumbag. But hey, if this stuff is the final bit that convinces you to oppose the guy, then great, whatever floats your boat. I’m betting that if you dug deep enough into their backgrounds, just about any Republican has sufficient dirt to destroy them. Somebody at the DNC oughta be working a lot harder on oppo research – I’m betting DUIs, big crashes, domestic abuse, lawsuits and all sorts of information is available through commercial and public databases. This stuff ought to be getting used more.

    BTW, public corruption in New Jersey falls into what Hearst classified as “dog bites man.” If you add “Republican” into the mix that’s like the double chocolate chocolate chip ice cream of corruption – tasty, but maybe almost overdoing it. So I’m not sure it’s really news.

  16. 16.

    JK

    September 4, 2009 at 10:10 pm

    New Jersey’s New State Song
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Y4u52__vUY&feature=fvw

  17. 17.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    September 4, 2009 at 10:13 pm

    Once when driving with friends in Italy I noticed that it seemed that we were driving down a one way street the wrong way. When I asked my friend who was driving he said “Ah, yes but you see, here in Italy those signs, it’s just a suggestion”

    I think “Driving the wrong way down a one-way street” is a pretty good metaphor for Republicans right now. In general.

  18. 18.

    beltane

    September 4, 2009 at 10:16 pm

    @Scruffy McSnufflepuss: Yeah. Christie’s not a dirtbag idiot who had to bribe his way into passing his road test. He’s a mav’rick who doesn’t need no stinking laws.

  19. 19.

    Tonal Crow

    September 4, 2009 at 10:20 pm

    @beltane: Not only that, he’s a tough-on-crime, law-and-order, no-nonsense corruption-fighter. Also.

  20. 20.

    jaquestraw

    September 4, 2009 at 10:21 pm

    ya’ll are grasping at straws.

  21. 21.

    mai naem

    September 4, 2009 at 10:27 pm

    This is the second traffic ticket issue. He also was in his car with wifey and office colleague when they got pulled over for speeding and didn’t have registration and insurance and the colleague pulled the USA name badge bit and got him out that ticket too. He’s just your average scumball repug. Oh, and BTW supposedly he’s still up by 10 points in polls against Corzine.

  22. 22.

    jaquestraw

    September 4, 2009 at 10:31 pm

    It was funny when Corzine was in that accident that nearly killed him and nobody had any sympathy for him.We all kind of had the attitude it served him right.That was cool

  23. 23.

    Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    September 4, 2009 at 10:53 pm

    @beltane:

    “Yeah. Christie’s not a dirtbag idiot who had to bribe his way into passing his road test. He’s a mav’rick who doesn’t need no stinking laws.”

    If he’d killed Bin Laden while he was driving the wrong way down that one-way street, everyone in America would love him. Yet these two-faced liberals want to impose a ridiculous double standard on the poor man, just because he didn’t happen to run Bin Laden over.

    Makes me sad to be an American, I’ll tell you.

  24. 24.

    Wonk Hussein

    September 4, 2009 at 10:57 pm

    The latest Christie quote from over at TPM:

    “First of all, the motorcycle hit me.”

    And it may be because I finally bought the boxed set of all 6 Seasons of The Sopranos, and have been power-watching since last weekend – but Christie is a dead ringer for Bobby Bacala.

    Fat fuck.

  25. 25.

    Rosali

    September 4, 2009 at 11:16 pm

    This is making me sad because it reminds me of the fall of 2000 when Bush’s DUI came out and I was hoping that it would lead to his defeat and it did but then he was selected anyway and then we had 9/11 and two wars and I think I’m going to pour myself a drink

  26. 26.

    DougJ

    September 4, 2009 at 11:38 pm

    This is making me sad because it reminds me of the fall of 2000 when Bush’s DUI came out and I was hoping that it would lead to his defeat and it did but then he was selected anyway and then we had 9/11 and two wars and I think I’m going to pour myself a drink

    The Bush DUI thing was kind of bullshit, though. It was 20 years earlier. I thought he’d be a terrible president (I was right) and even I didn’t hold that against him. This Christie thing seems lot worse, since he got sued and lied about it.

  27. 27.

    Allan

    September 5, 2009 at 12:46 am

    But so far we haven’t had a public apology from the motorcyclist for failing to avoid hitting Christie’s car when it came barrelling up the one-way street at him, and his sincere promise to do better the next time Christie tries to run him over.

    Then the story will be complete.

  28. 28.

    bob h

    September 5, 2009 at 6:39 am

    For the ordinary NJ-ite, traffic laws are rigorously enforced. Get caught above the legal limit in NJ and you will wish you were never born. Auto inspections are rigorous and picky, and rates for insurance and registration are sky-high. This is not going to pass unnoticed.

  29. 29.

    EnderWiggin

    September 5, 2009 at 6:54 am

    @Scruffy McSnufflepuss:

    well played sir

  30. 30.

    EconWatcher

    September 5, 2009 at 8:26 am

    Re: Scruffy McSnufflepuss

    I’m with EnderWiggin. That was some mighty fine snark. It’s the talent pool on this site that keeps me coming back.

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

VA Purple House Delegates

Donate

Political Action

Postcard Writing Information

Recent Comments

  • OzarkHillbilly on Friday Morning Open Thread: Be Aware of the Autumn Supermoon (Sep 29, 2023 @ 10:05am)
  • wmd on RIP Diane Feinstein (Sep 29, 2023 @ 10:04am)
  • laura on RIP Diane Feinstein (Sep 29, 2023 @ 10:03am)
  • Sure Lurkalot on Squishable Morning Thread (Sep 29, 2023 @ 10:01am)
  • SkyBluePink on On The Road – way2blue – Valparaiso, Chile [2 of 2] (Sep 29, 2023 @ 10:01am)

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
We All Need A Little Kindness
What Has Biden Done for You Lately?

Balloon Juice Meetups!

All Meetups
Talk of Meetups – Meetup Planning

Fundraising 2023-24

Wis*Dems Supreme Court + SD-8

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)

Twitter / Spoutible

Balloon Juice (Spoutible)
WaterGirl (Spoutible)
TaMara (Spoutible)
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
TaMara
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
ActualCitizensUnited

Join the Fight!

Join the Fight Signup Form
All Join the Fight Posts

Balloon Juice for Ukraine

Donate

Cole & Friends Learn Español

Introductory Post
Cole & Friends Learn Español

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2023 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!