Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

Following reporting rules is only for the little people, apparently.

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

The most dangerous place for a black man in America is in a white man’s imagination.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

Everybody saw this coming.

White supremacy is terrorism.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Not all heroes wear capes.

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

Republicans: slavery is when you own me. freedom is when I own you.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

Spilling the end game before they can coat it in frankl luntz-approved dogwhistles.

No offense, but this thread hasn’t been about you for quite a while.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

You don’t get to peddle hatred on saturday and offer condolences on sunday.

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28Comments

  5. 5.

    scarshapedstar

    Large numbers boggle their minds. That’s why whenever a bill costs a billion dollars, some Republican senator helpfully explains that if you piled up a billion Ford Excursions they’d make a pile bigger than mount Everest, or whatever.

  10. 10.

    arguingwithsignposts

    @John Cole:

    I had not seen that before. Where could I get in on some of that Jesus money action. I’d really appreciate it more than the trickle-down Reagan/Bush/Bush money I’m making now.

  14. 14.

    Mike G

    Jesus Math:
    To give the proposed economic stimulus plan some perspective, “if you started the day Jesus Christ was born and spent $1 million every day since then, you still wouldn’t have spent $1 trillion.”

    To give the Pentagon budget some perspective, if you started the day Jesus Christ was born and spent $1 million every day since then, you’d cover the Pentagon’s spending for about 12 months.

    But in Jesus-Rightard World, the Pentagon isn’t ‘big government’ because their dollars are shit by patriotic eagles soaring high over Ronald Reagan Valhalla.

  16. 16.

    Wile E. Quixote

    @DougJ

    …what is it with wingers and big numbers?

    Thousand Year Reich?

    Then there’s Larry Craig’s favorite, “eight inches of throbbing pink Jesus”. OK, maybe eight inches isn’t a *big* number, but it was big enough for Larry.

  17. 17.

    polyorchnid octopunch

    Well, you know, when numbers get really really large, people have a hard time conceiving them properly. So, authoritarian leaders throw out really big numbers like the one you cited because they know that they’ll be outside the scope of their follower’s easy conception and therefore will both confuse them and sound really impressive.

    …’cause you know, 5 000, 36 000, and 2 000 000 are numbers that are completely outside the brain scale for teabaggers.

  19. 19.

    eyelessgame

    Don’t forget SIX THOUSAND YEAR OLD EARTH, bitches!

    It’s all about the edjumacation. Cons can’t count.

  21. 21.

    Paulie Chestnuts

    The stupid-ass Electoral College makes them think that their take on things is bigger than real life.

  22. 22.

    Anne Laurie

    @Paulie Chestnuts:

    The stupid-ass Electoral College makes them think that their take on things is bigger than real life.

    For the win! That’s why Larry Craig thinks his ‘wide stance’ is so impressive — he’s using the Idaho EC standard!

  23. 23.

    Nutella

    One of my college roommates, a straight A student, had trouble with the idea of quantity. She insisted, for example, that if one vitamin was good for you then three vitamins must be three times as good. When she graduated she went to work for AEI.

  25. 25.

    Gunner

    Someone needs to tell the Republicans that they’re using the cm side of the ruler. They need to flip it around for inches.

  26. 26.

    Analytical Liberal

    All Rethugs suffer from the “I’ve Got a Bigger Dick Than You” Syndrome. They have to show how manly they are by grabbing their crotches, puffing out their chests, and bragging about their reality-defying greatness. Or, to paraphrase Jon Stewart, maybe they’re just being dicks.

  27. 27.

    Numberwang

    It’s not just big numbers. Numbers seem above reproach, something you can no more argue with than you could count 5 apples as 4. Some genius in the GOP realized that attaching a number to any argument helps fix it in someone’s mind, and gives them a “fact” to throw at people with whom the disagree. When that number is thrown out there, it sticks in the other person’s mind and, hopefully, becomes one more person spreading your argument.

    Remember the army of Republicans marching through TV studios in 2004 who kept repeating that John Kerry had voted against “the troops” X times? Or that he had voted to increase taxes Y times? In both cases, they were artifacts of Senate procedure, caused by one or two particular issues that required a ridiculous number of votes, but they stuck.

    Expect to start hearing about how Obama “voted to fund ACORN 152 times” any day now.

  28. 28.

    slippy

    @Nutella: That’s hilarious. I remember being lectured sternly as a young teenager, during the Just Say No era, that people took drugs because if you took some drugs, like aspirin, they made you feel better, so the logic was if you too lots of drugs when you weren’t sick you’d feel great. I was then told that this logic was baaaaaad.

    Another case of conservatives having things both ways or whatever way is convenient for them depending on which way the wind is blowing or just whatever the hell they want because conservatives are all a bunch of stupid god-damned liars anyway.

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