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You are here: Home / Politics / Republican Stupidity / Wookin Pa Nub

Wookin Pa Nub

by John Cole|  November 8, 20096:46 pm| 61 Comments

This post is in: Republican Stupidity, Clown Shoes

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Such a shame:

Sen. John Ensign has moved out of the C Street house, the Christian home he shared with other elected officials on Capitol Hill that came under scrutiny for its residents’ beliefs and practices and their role in trying to end the Nevada Republican’s affair with a campaign staff member.

The red brick town house emerged this summer as the subject of political intrigue — not only as a pivotal location in Ensign’s affair with Cynthia Hampton, but also that of South Carolina Republican Gov. Mark Sanford, who sought guidance there as he wrestled with his own affair.

Looks like there will be no more wetsuit optional Christian seksitime at the C street brothel for Senator Ensign, which means he will probably be really grumpy at the office tomorrow. Then again, since he apparently is into banging the hired help, maybe this just expands his opportunities.

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Reader Interactions

61Comments

  1. 1.

    TenguPhule

    November 8, 2009 at 6:49 pm

    Looks like there will be no more wetsuit optional Christian seksitime at the C street brothel for Senator Ensign, which means he will probably be really grumpy at the office tomorrow.

    Who knows what evil now lurks in the heart of the toilet stalls?

    The Shadow knows.

  2. 2.

    WereBear

    November 8, 2009 at 6:49 pm

    Still laughing over the title.

  3. 3.

    Cat Lady

    November 8, 2009 at 6:51 pm

    LOL at the post title. Otay!

  4. 4.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 6:56 pm

    I don’t get the title. I like it, but wtf?

  5. 5.

    AhabTRuler

    November 8, 2009 at 6:57 pm

    Unce…Tice…Tee times a waby!

  6. 6.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    … because I’m in search of a new band name. Wookin Pa Nub isn’t it, but it sure rolls off the tongue!

  7. 7.

    AhabTRuler

    November 8, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    err, sorry, … Fee tines a Mady

  8. 8.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    Eddie Murphy as Buh’wheet?

  9. 9.

    ploeg

    November 8, 2009 at 7:00 pm

    @MelodyMaker:

    Start at 1:05 if you don’t have any patience:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHiZ15x6Vt4

  10. 10.

    donovong

    November 8, 2009 at 7:02 pm

    Wookin pa nub?!?

    Oh! NOW I get it!

  11. 11.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 7:03 pm

    @ploeg:
    “The URL contained a malformed video ID. ”
    I think I’m starting to get it. NOT

  12. 12.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 7:04 pm

    that little faggot with the earring and the mink coat?

  13. 13.

    RedKitten

    November 8, 2009 at 7:04 pm

    Ah, SNL at its best. I still giggle when I think of Mr. Robinson’s Neighbourhood and James Brown’s Celebrity Hot Tub.

  14. 14.

    General Winfield Stuck

    November 8, 2009 at 7:04 pm

    Nolo mo sly Poontang for you mister wingnut.

  15. 15.

    Left Coast Tom

    November 8, 2009 at 7:08 pm

    That’s OK…the C-Street Sexytime Palace still has Bart Stupid, I mean Stupak (D-MI), among it’s residents. So there’s still someone out there fighting the good fight for Moral Righteousness while living in a Den Of Iniquity.

  16. 16.

    General Winfield Stuck

    November 8, 2009 at 7:09 pm

    I’m sure they will all sit around the campfire now hand in hand with baby jeebus for strength, followed by a rousing round of Indian Toe Wrestling.

  17. 17.

    Violet

    November 8, 2009 at 7:10 pm

    @MelodyMaker:

    Here you go.

    …in all ta wong paces.

  18. 18.

    Morbo

    November 8, 2009 at 7:11 pm

    role in trying to end cover up the Nevada Republican’s affair with a campaign staff member.

    There you go, Las Vegas Sun, fixed that for ya. Also, awesome title.

  19. 19.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 7:11 pm

    yeah. the whole philosophy seems to be that rules are for the ruled and we rule, so lets get bizzay.

  20. 20.

    Violet

    November 8, 2009 at 7:16 pm

    Ensign probably hasn’t ever tried to make seksitime without having the C Street brothel available. He won’t know what to do. Book a hotel room? Bring a hooker home? What’s a pampered, enabled Republican Senator to do once his seksitime love pad is taken away?

  21. 21.

    General Winfield Stuck

    November 8, 2009 at 7:18 pm

    @Violet:

    Learn to play the five fingered flute?

  22. 22.

    Violet

    November 8, 2009 at 7:21 pm

    @General Winfield Stuck: Probably hasn’t had to do that without assistance in so long he’s forgot how. Isn’t that also on the Christianist Unapproved list?

  23. 23.

    The Saff

    November 8, 2009 at 7:23 pm

    Gawd but I hate John Ensign. Come to think of it, I hate most Rethuglicans. Buncha sleazy, self-serving, hypocritical bastards. They all deserve to rot in hell.

    And now they’re all concerned about deficits and how we can’t afford health care reform? What about green-lighting the fiasco that is the Iraq War to the tune of $1 trillion plus? $1.5 trillion tax cut for the uber-wealthy? Billions of dollars to the drug companies in 2003?

    If they despise the government so much, why don’t they resign their offices and get the heck out of Dodge.

    Screw every last one of them.

    /rant over

  24. 24.

    General Winfield Stuck

    November 8, 2009 at 7:24 pm

    Isn’t that also on the Christianist Unapproved list?

    He may go blind, but then he’ll see.

  25. 25.

    Spork

    November 8, 2009 at 7:24 pm

    Since there is no Football open thread, I’m going w/ the OT:
    GO SEAHAWKS! ugly win, but a win is a win. One good thing about being in the worst division, always hope to crawl into the playoffs. Leave me alone, it’s all I’ve got.

  26. 26.

    Left Coast Tom

    November 8, 2009 at 7:25 pm

    @Violet: They don’t seem to object to boner pills for single radio commentators traveling to the Dominican Republic…I guess Christianists have somewhat malleable views of the things they approve of.

  27. 27.

    Violet

    November 8, 2009 at 7:25 pm

    @The Saff:

    If they despise the government so much, why don’t they resign their offices and get the heck out of Dodge.

    David Schuster made that point after Tom Tancredo walked off the set during the back and forth with Kos. Perhaps this point is a good one to keep hammering home. If the Republicans despise government so much, why don’t they just quit and go do something else? It certainly changes the discussion.

  28. 28.

    General Winfield Stuck

    November 8, 2009 at 7:27 pm

    Football is dead to Cole, until tomorrow night.

  29. 29.

    Scott H

    November 8, 2009 at 7:28 pm

    Heavens, these creeping pathetics, skulking and groping around the scullery. Can’t we once get a little manly misbehavior with at minimum a viscountess? I’d settle for an atheist in a decent suit and an honest tan.

  30. 30.

    JenJen

    November 8, 2009 at 7:29 pm

    No football threads on non-Steelers Sundays? No AFC North love at all?

    Also, lots of guidance is sought at the C Street House, apparently. Guidance. Lots of it.

  31. 31.

    AkaDad

    November 8, 2009 at 7:31 pm

    @Violet:

    Someone has to stop the Liberal Democrats from destroying America!

  32. 32.

    The Saff

    November 8, 2009 at 7:33 pm

    @Violet: That video was a thing of beauty.

    Like the Balloon Juice commentariat regularly point out, nobody in the media calls these assholes out on anything.

  33. 33.

    General Winfield Stuck

    November 8, 2009 at 7:33 pm

    viscountess?

    I think she was just a staffer. Or the wife of one.

  34. 34.

    GregB

    November 8, 2009 at 7:39 pm

    There’ll always be the Larry Craig Memorial Glory Hole at the Minnesota airport.

    -G

  35. 35.

    Anoniminous

    November 8, 2009 at 7:45 pm

    Let’s get Teh Whoopie© OUT of the C street house and back into airport toilets where it belongs.

  36. 36.

    kommrade reproductive vigor

    November 8, 2009 at 7:46 pm

    Making fun of Repukes who have sex with anything that moves is sexist.

    @RedKitten: C-I-L-L. Mah lanlawd.

  37. 37.

    jl

    November 8, 2009 at 7:59 pm

    OT, but it is my ‘what up, big tent party?’ watch, day two:

    Right-Wing Unleashes Racism on Rep Cao
    http://yglesias.thinkprogress.org/archives/2009/11/right-wing-unleashes-racism-on-rep-cao.php

    I will get bored with it, so this is probably the first and last installment. Especially since somebody said Cao was the perfct wishy washy nonentity in a CNN interview (but, more reason to think he would be a good Blue Dog, then).

    I will go see if I can find that interview on youtube.

    As for Ensign, I don’t know what to say. Hope he can keep out of trouble, since he seems helpless. I have compassion, even for GOPers.

    I still have a hard time believing what I have read about his messes, but I guess they are true. I half expected to read that somebody had to pin notes to his lapel, in case he got mixed up.

  38. 38.

    geg6

    November 8, 2009 at 8:08 pm

    This is the best thread title EVAH, Mr. Cole. That is all, except to say fuck Mike Doyle (D-PA), another C Streeter, too.

  39. 39.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 8:10 pm

    @The Saff:

    Your argument works, but they have a point of view that is represented in congress. Reagan’s inaugural. mhm
    and screw them, as you said.
    Joke ’em if they can’t take a fuck, or something like that.

  40. 40.

    Keith G

    November 8, 2009 at 8:26 pm

    @MelodyMaker:

    that little faggot with the earring and the mink coat?

    Please, no. That grates.

  41. 41.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 8:35 pm

    Sry. I thought that might.
    It’s from Dire Straits’ “Money for Nothing” chicks for freee

  42. 42.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 8:36 pm

    Working pa nutbin.

  43. 43.

    Nutella

    November 8, 2009 at 8:37 pm

    Stupak lives in the hot-sheet hotel on C Street? The same Stupak who insisted that the HCR bill be so moral and clean that it won’t deal with the unfortunate consequences of the activities that those legislators are doing in the C Street house? That Stupak?

  44. 44.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 8:41 pm

    @Nutella:
    you got a cite for that?

  45. 45.

    Left Coast Tom

    November 8, 2009 at 8:44 pm

    @Nutella:

    That Stupak?

    Apparently he claims he’s not really a member, he just lives there.

    But…yeah, that Stupak.

  46. 46.

    Keith G

    November 8, 2009 at 8:44 pm

    @MelodyMaker: lol, you’re right. Forgot about that. Ah, the 80’s.

  47. 47.

    Left Coast Tom

    November 8, 2009 at 8:45 pm

    That link didn’t work…try http://tinyurl.com/mtq9mp

  48. 48.

    Comrade Darkness

    November 8, 2009 at 8:45 pm

    Ensign? which is he again? Someone needs to issue player cards with vitals on the back for these guys. There are too many to keep straight.

    Republican Playas, collect the whole set!

  49. 49.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 8:54 pm

    @Comrade Darkness:
    Dark, I’m gonna go ahead and be optimistic:
    Shitwits and liars will be shown to be what they are because their statements are on the record like never before. That’s f’n funny if you’re me.

  50. 50.

    MelodyMaker

    November 8, 2009 at 9:48 pm

    arite, fuggit. dumbesses.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQF5CXV9cos

    You know it? I know it.

  51. 51.

    AnneS

    November 8, 2009 at 9:50 pm

    After this week, can we have some Tunch and Lilly? Gracias.

  52. 52.

    parksideq

    November 8, 2009 at 10:00 pm

    OT, but the Cleveland show (the Family Guy spinoff) just did the BEST takedown of those creepy ass purity balls where Christianist dads make their daughters pledge their virginity to them. Long story short, it rips apart the double standard that women who have sex are whores, but dudes can be actual whores without consequence.

    Looking back, maybe it’s not as OT as I thought.

  53. 53.

    bago

    November 8, 2009 at 11:38 pm

    I am on C street right now, getting hassled about my particular proclivities.

  54. 54.

    r€nato

    November 9, 2009 at 8:17 am

    since he apparently is into banging the hired help, maybe this just expands his opportunities.

    maybe he and ex-ESPN baseball analyst Steve Phillips should get together and form their own ‘Christian home’…

  55. 55.

    asiangrrlMN

    November 9, 2009 at 9:33 am

    @Violet: Oh my gawd, that was hi-larious.

    Hasn’t Ensign REsigned yet? Have you no shame, sir?

  56. 56.

    SFAW

    November 9, 2009 at 10:25 am

    I think she was just a staffer. Or the wife of one.

    General –

    I think you misunderstood. They said she was “on his staff”.

    There’s a difference.

  57. 57.

    General Winfield Stuck

    November 9, 2009 at 10:44 am

    They said she was “on his staff”.

    Yes, whoever said puns are the lowest form of humor didn’t follow politics.

  58. 58.

    SFAW

    November 9, 2009 at 11:04 am

    Yes, whoever said puns are the lowest form of humor didn’t follow politics.

    Please forgive me for correcting you, but that’s not a pun.

    I don’t know if Spider Robinson still does it – I don’t even know if he’s still writing – but there were more than a few in his “Callahan’s” series. One that I can recall has the punchline: “Middle lamb, you’ve had a dizzy Bey”. (Explaining it would take too long.)

    I wish I were smart enough to come up with good puns.

  59. 59.

    General Winfield Stuck

    November 9, 2009 at 1:06 pm

    Please forgive me for correcting you, but that’s not a pun.

    We should take a pole.

  60. 60.

    KLG

    November 9, 2009 at 1:09 pm

    This IS the best thread title evah! But this is also from when SNL was second-best. 1975-1980 will never be surpassed. But I guess you had to be there. Jane, you ignorant…land shark.

    John, just how is it that you used to be a GOPer? That is something I’ll never understand.

  61. 61.

    SFAW

    November 9, 2009 at 2:48 pm

    We should take a pole.

    There ya go.

    Or perhaps, there she went.

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