I know you’ve all been wondering Rod Jetton’s “safe words” were. They don’t disappoint:
[W]hen he left the woman’s home the next morning he told her: “You should have said ‘green balloons’.”
I like these safe words for a lot of reasons: (1) the similarity to the name of this blog and (2) the fact that it sounds like an expression the At Pack would use (“black swans”, “green shoots”), for example.
But, still, I can’t help but wax nostalgic about the carefree innocence of double wetsuits and dildos.
Mal Carne
If you and Charles Johnson had a love child…
The Moar You Know
She’s lucky. That fat blubber-lipped fuck looks like he gets his jollies by murdering women and burying them in his basement, not smacking them around while fucking them.
chopper
man, i’m trying to come up with something snarky enough to meet BJs high threshold, but all i can think of is what a fucking scumbag this guy is.
Stefan
This reminds me that I actually need to choose a new safe word. My current safeword, “more”, has led to some otherwise avoidable confusion…..
OK, worst safewords/phrases ever: the floor is open…..
Noonan
But, but I thought it was ’99 Luft Balloons?’
geg6
This so sick, I can’t even laugh at it. All I want to do is cry for my country. Because this is what we’ve become. No better than this asshole who gets his rocks off beating women. Foam finger time, I guess.
chuck
So all KSM had to do was say “Green Balloons”?
SP
Wow, that was actually from the police report- I assumed JMM was tossing a joke on the end of the post.
beltane
And here I was wondering if Rod Jetton’s girlfriend was a chunky Reese Witherspoon.
freelancer
Jettson’s just trying to scam is way onto a reality show on CurrentTv.
“Green Balloons”, sheeh, but the GOP is lame.
akaoni
I think this would make an excellent addition to the Lexicon. Green Balloons would be a great tag for bible thumping hypocrites’ sexual peccadilloes. In fact I’m surprised John hasn’t beaten us to the punch.
Catsy
Actually, “green balloons” isn’t a bad choice for a safe word/phrase. The important thing in choosing one is to ensure it:
1. is easy to remember and say (and recognize!) when panicked or in pain
2. wouldn’t be said in that context for any other reason
3. cannot be mistaken for any cry of pleasure or pain
In my own experience I’ve found that it also helps to make it humorous. Not only does this defuse what can be a rough moment, it also helps yank everyone out of their headspace so they can focus on aftercare.
There’s plenty about this story that stinks and makes this guy look like a legendary douchebag. The choice of safeword isn’t one of them.
Betsy
@geg6:
I’m with you, at least in the not being able to laugh at it part. Domestic violence /= teh funny.
But I refuse to accept that this is what our country’s become. It’s one ex-state legislator. He ain’t representative, pardon the pun.
ETA: OH MA GAHD I CAN HAZ THE EDIT FUNCTION!!!
SpotWeld
Any chance that any GOP member who shows up without thier voting card is given a nice big green balloon tied to thier desk?
Stefan
[W]hen he left the woman’s home the next morning he told her: “You should have said ‘green balloons’.”
It’s always someone else’s fault with the Republicans, isn’t it? It’s never their responsibility to stop beating on some innocent woman/child/gay man/race/the concept of science/sovereign nation/objective reality, it’s always someone else’s fault for not stopping them. Nice country we’re going to have when the governing ethos of one of our two main parties is “bitch made me do it”…..
geg6
@Betsy:
Sorry, but I fail to see how this isn’t the equivalent to what is happening in the Senate HCR negotiations. Or pretty much anything that GOPers are against and the “moderates” are equivocating about. We are the abused spouse of our legislators.
@Catsy:
Kinda hard to remember the safe word when you’ve been given a date rape drug. Which is what TPM says the woman claims in the police report.
freelancer
@Betsy:
I think we’re laughing at the absurdity, not the violence. The closest I can get to being a pig who says “If she didn’t want to get raped, she shouldn’t have dressed like that”, would be in the vein of “YOU SHOULDN’T BE HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH A REPUBLICAN!”
Brent
She shoulda known the safe word wasn’t “gfffkk heggc keffh”
Catsy
@geg6:
Yes, so I read. I’m confused as to how that bears on the point I was making, though.
DougJ
I think we’re laughing at the absurdity, not the violence.
Yes, that is right. We’ve laughed at worse things here, IMHO.
Corner Stone
@Catsy: I would suggest the safe word always be just one word.
And for goodness sake do not make it “fluggegecheimen”
freelancer
@Corner Stone:
Mi Scuzi!
Tsulagi
You just gotta stand back in awe at that R-nutter vaunted sense of personal responsibility and accountability. It’s her fault.
Never mind when he had his hands around her neck choking her that might have impeded her ability to say “green balloons.” Nah. Or while unconscious due to either the beating or drugs he slipped into her wine as the woman believes happened. Nope, it’s all her fault for not gasping “green balloons” while unconscious or when getting her throat crushed. He’s the victim.
geg6
@Catsy:
Just pointing out that a good safe word doesn’t help when you’re unconscious.
AB
If I told George Bush “green balloons”, would have have stopped beating the shit out of my country ; ;
kay
I can’t help really liking this woman, because the assumption would be that she wouldn’t file a complaint.
She’s in it at the beginning and he can do anything, because who is going to go to police?
But, she did. I bet her partner here was…very surprised.
valdivia
@Catsy:
Glad to see someone advocating the use of safe words and putting the whole, outside the norm iatropic experience, in context. as despicable as this is because of the use of the drug to incapacitate the woman, there are many who do step outside the norm and and are consenting adults and need to know how to use safe words in all sorts of not necessary violent situations.
/wondering if this is too weird a topic for BJ/
Catsy
@geg6: Didn’t say it does. I’m simply throwing a bit of cold water on the fun of people who through ignorance of BDSM have gotten the idea that a safeword being “green balloons” signifies anything whatsoever. It has nothing to do with why this guy is a douchebag, it says nothing about either of them, it’s nothing but a reasonably okay (if boring–I’ve heard much better) safeword.
soonergrunt
@Catsy:
That’s why I will use “Makewi!” or “BrickOvenBill!” from now on.
My wife will be like “WTF!?” and everything will stop.
And thanks, John for giving us back the edit function.
Anne Laurie
@SpotWeld:
WIN!
How can we forward this genius idea to Alan Grayson?
Zifnab
:-)
R-Jud
@valdivia:
“Skull-fucking kittens”.
Still wondering?
valdivia
@R-Jud:
lol. true dat.
Catsy
@Corner Stone:
I think the number of words is less important than the number of syllables, how easy it is to say and recognize, and how distinctive and unique it is. “Hamburger” isn’t really any easier or harder to say than “green balloons”.
flukebucket
Man you learn all kinds of shit at Balloon-Juice. From “Dirty Sanchez” to “safeword”
I did some reading on safewords and it seems that green usually implies that the partner either wants it more or wants it harder.
The absurdity of one is the foreplay of another.
There ain’t but one safe word in my opinion
LOCKBOX!
Keith
Now that you are initiated, you will want to next research “the hanky code”
The Moar You Know
I’m just thinking that’s a hell of a thing to be saying to your mistress over coffee in the morning:
Hell, call me old-fashioned, but I don’t stay the night after choking and beating the shit out of my women. The post-battering cuddling always feels a bit…awkward.
Catsy
Someone on TPM just made a good point that has me rethinking the wisdom of green balloons as a safeword: the fact that colors are commonly used as “backups” in case the bottom forgets the agreed-upon safeword. The convention is generally that “green” means “more/harder/like this”, yellow means “less/slow down” and “red” means an immediate hard stop.
Choosing “green balloons” as a “stop” word is just inviting confusion.
comrade scott's agenda of rage
Here’s his mug shot:
http://mopns.com/2009/12/08/picture-of-the-day-kinky-rod-jettons-mug-shot/
Obviously the Cole County CH didn’t have a spare comb.
And the old phrase “shit eating grin” comes to mind.
Notorious P.A.T.
I think “Rush Limbaugh” would be a good safe word. Talk about a mood-killer.
@Stefan:
haha )
gizmo
Maybe she yelled, “Little Green Footballs,” and he didn’t accept that as a valid codeword.
Dreggas
@Catsy:
agreed on the syllable part. In most cases the safewords used are
Red- Stop
Yellow – slow down
Green – go ahead.
Now granted using a phrase like “Green Balloon” could snap people out of a given headspace but it seems there were drugs involved not to mention tape over the mouth of the woman.
Andre
Is this the bit where I tell everyone I’ll be in my bunk?
Brent
@The Moar You Know:
you are a bit old fashioned if your idea of the perfect morning doesn’t include a black eyed blue necked woman limping over to pour you some coffee with the hash browns, runny eggs, pancakes and sausages she just fixed.
General Winfield Stuck
Well fuck me. Small wonders. Cole must have been waiting till I left. Got to test this.
Query
Is “Ass Rabies” contagious and is there a vaccine?
What about “Mouth Clap”?
Testing
edit. Well shit, it’s real.
Notorious P.A.T.
And yet here you are, using snark when discussing it.
YankeeApologist
@soonergrunt:
Awwww . . . . don’t be so hard on Makewi or BrickOvenBill. I think we should welcome a little bit of the opposite number’s mindset.
Doesn’t it make you realize how correct the rest of us are?
AngusTheGodOfMeat
So, the message is, we can string any set of words together under a thread title that includes the words “Rough Sex” and get a thread going.
That’s what makes this a great blog!
And, is “Get the fuck off me!” a safe word?
The Moar You Know
@Brent: I have missed out on so much in life.
Waynski
Can you say “green balloons” on the Appalachian Trail? And I’m wondering how you utter anything that forms a word when you’re being choked into unconsciousness.
calipygian
I think its pretty plain to anyone with half a brain that anyone with a “Real Murkin” Red State non-latte sipping profile like this one is probably skinning fat girls in a pit in his basement and making coats out of them.
Gender: Male
Family: Wife: Cassie 3 Children: Callie, Elaine, Will.
Birth date: 09/09/1967
Birthplace: DeSoto, MO
Home City: Marble Hill, MO
Religion: Baptist
Education:
BA, Political Science/History, Southwestern Baptist University, 1990.
Professional Experience:
Owner, Jetton James Real Estate Company, 1996-present
Infantry Officer, United States Marine Corps, Bosnia/Somalia, 1991-1995
Field Coordinator, Congressman Bill Emerson’s Campaign, 1990.
Political Experience:
Speaker of the House, Missouri State House of Representatives, 2005-present
Representative, Missouri State House of Representatives, 2000-present
County Commissioner, Bollinger County, 1997-2000.
Organizations:
New Salem Baptist Church, 1997-present
Optimist Club of Marble Hill, 1995-present
Veterans of Foreign Wars Post 5900, 1995-present
Farm Bureau, 1990-present
Chamber of Commerce
Christian Coalition
Harmony Congregation Church
National Federation of Independent Business
National Rifle Association.
I wonder what his kids and his loving Christian brothers and sisters think of this?
Oh yeah – IOKIYAR. Or a select Christian.
J. Michael Neal
Always make sure you know which hip to wear your big set of keys on, too.
Dreggas
@J. Michael Neal:
Yep.
soonergrunt
@YankeeApologist:
While I agree with you on this point, I want to point out that the purpose of a safeword, with respect to BDSM is, as Catsy pointed out:
And given that, what could be more appropriate or effective? I will agree with the poster who suggested Rush Limbaugh as to effectiveness, but my wife doesn’t know anything about our resident paste-eaters except what I’ve told her about their total dumbshittedness, and (probably) won’t experience the nausea and vomiting that typically accompanies the mental image of Rush in a similar condition.
I’m all about safety, you know.
Dreggas
@calipygian:
It’s real simple, he will just repent, beg forgiveness and all will be well. You see he’s a nice white christian so it’s ok.
Robin G.
Will there be tests to see whether she was drugged? Would it still turn up on a scan?
It would suck if this turned into a generalized BDSM witch hunt. That being said, whether she was drugged or not (if she was, it’s no longer even a matter of debate that it was premeditated rape), this guy is a fucking douche. A decent man would have been horrified to find out that his partner wasn’t enjoying herself, but rather had just forgotten the safeword; rubbing it in with a snotty “oh, shoulda said ‘green ballons!'” comment is assholery of the highest order, even if everything else was above board.
stevie314159
Damn, I thought the safe word was “WOLVERINES”
AB
why do you need a safe word anyway? can you just say “stop”?
valdivia
@Robin G.:
this.
Minionero
Please define “At Pack”.
It’s not in the lexicon!
Notorious P.A.T.
@Robin G.:
No doubt about it.
Just ask The Family.
gnomedad
Now that Charles Johnson has Gone Cole, what if LGF and BJ merged? Hmm, what could we call it?
scav
O, the things a geographic education will get you into. I read isotropic (the same in all directions) for atropic (describing a need to see a physician) and given that we also sometimes describe the isotropic plane as the frictionless plane… *NOT* something that makes a lot of sense in the current discussion.
DougJ
Please define “At Pack”.
All the fine young cannibals who write for, or used to write for, the Atlantic blogs: Ambinder, Douthat, McCardle, Yglesias. Whether Sullivan counts or not is complicated, it’s like figuring out if Harry Dean Stanton was an ex officio member of the brat pack.
arguingwithsignposts
@AngusTheGodOfMeat:
OT, but in case you missed it – my capitulation.
soonergrunt
@AB: For some men and women (and yes, this is the case) saying the word stop and having it ignored–or even that being the cause of things going up a notch–is part of the fantasy.
That’s why you come up with a phrase or word that is extremely unlikely to have any context within the fantasy or game.
Hence, RED LIMITED SLIP DIFFERENTIAL! or some such.
General Winfield Stuck
@gnomedad:
Little Green Fuckers
edit- just cause I could.
Zifnab
@AB:
Then you end up in the “Oh no, stop you big sexy man you!” / “Oh no, stop! I think you might have actually bruised something!” conundrum.
A safe word lets your partner know whether or not to take you seriously.
Thadeus Horne
@Catsy: Laughing helicopters.
valdivia
@soonergrunt:
I was just typing this same point but you said it so much better than I ever could. So, what you said.
d0n camillo
@gnomedad:
Little Green Balloon Juice? Eww.
Adrienne
Is it just me, or maybe he should have ran the “safeword” by her BEFORE he beat the living shit out of her? Eh, maybe I’m wrong.
@The Moar You Know:
Hehe. Well, clearly he didn’t get the memo.
Dreggas
@soonergrunt:
What sooner said. It’s something completely out of the blue vs. something that may be said, but not necessarily meant, in the course of play. You could be tickling someone and they start yelling stop but don’t really mean it, then suddenly they yell red you know they want you to stop.
soonergrunt
@valdivia: Thanks. I try. This time of day is best for me, because if anybody is having any computer problems here at work, they keep quiet about it. They’re under the mistaken impression (of which I do NOT disabuse them) that they’ll have to stay late with me to fix the problem.
I don’t get paid overtime no matter how long I’m here.
Robin G.
@AB: Because BDSM involves a lot of roleplay. Saying “no,” “don’t,” or “stop” is often part of that roleplay. Hence the importance of having something completely seperate and immediately distinguishable — like “green balloons” — as your substitute “stop.” It serves the same function as the other words — a withdrawal of consent. Continuing after your partner has said the safeword is rape.
Edit: soonergrunt and others are faster than I am.
anonymous
Informal poll of 3 Submissives in the BDSM scene that I’m friends with and all 3 feel the woman in this case is likely lying about several details in this case. That doesn’t mean there isn’t reason to investigate the complaint, but there’s something on the story that really pings their BS detector for this specific case.
If the woman’s complaints bear out and in fact she’s telling the truth, He deserves to be in jail for a nice long time, in particular if he slipped he a roofie or something similar.
But BDSM 101 – if the submissive goes unconscious, you stop the scene and revive and call 911 if the submissive doesn’t revive right away. You don’t keep choking and beating the submissive. if THAT part is true, even if he didn’t slip her a roofie, if he kept going after she was unconscious, he should be charged with reckless endangerment. The assault charge is a tougher sell, but still possible, in particular if they didn’t have an agreement that he could continue after she was unconscious. (which is possible for people who adhere to Risk Aware Consensual Kink (RACK) as opposed to Safe Sane Consensual (SSC)) Since we don’t know what prior conversations or activities they’d engaged in before, we don’t know if they had in fact talked about everything and all parties were in agreement.
Irresponsible people in BDSM give it a bad name.
Dreggas
@Robin G.:
I have, however, seen someone use the safeword (for example red) and after a little while start up playing again. The safe word can stop play and if the people involved decide to play can resume.
SiubhanDuinne
Breaking news alert (O/T):
gnomedad
Afghanistan Bananistan.
Robin G.
@Dreggas: Very true. A safeword doesn’t have to mean you’re calling things off entirely.
Moral of the story for aspiring kinksters: Talk. Beforehand. A Lot. With Specifics. (Sounds like the woman in this instance did, mind.)
Dreggas
@anonymous:
Couldn’t have said it better myself
Nate
A Kinky Day in the blogosphere….can we get some commentary on “Fisting-gate” being touted by Malkin, et. al.?
Dreggas
@Robin G.:
Talk during even. Communication is the key for any relationship but it’s doubly important when one partner is wielding an instrument of pain/pleasure.
jrg
I’ve found that “I’ve got crabs” makes a good safe word.
valdivia
@anonymous:
Amen. Amen. Amen.
did you guys see the case of the law student and the law professor in Michigan last year? It had all the hallmarks of a submissive who did not know what she was doing. All the sordid details were on blogs and local papers but at no point did I see as good a discussion of BDSM as we are having here.
Dreggas
@valdivia:
never heard that story. That being said i still find it amusing to see how many fellow kinksters i find on this blog :)
YankeeApologist
@soonergrunt:
I would like to thank you, Sooner, because I didn’t think to imagine Rush in such a state until you mentioned it.
Excuse me now while I go take care of my nausea and vomiting.
valdivia
@Dreggas:
yes, I too am surprised, in a wow how cool is that sort of way.
I am going to go use Teh Google and put the link here. The girl had been ‘escorting’ by advertising on Craigslist to pay for law school and had had a few dates with the Prof. Afterward, I think a few days, she went to the police, and it all became a he said she said legal morass but as I said the interesting part was that of all the discussions I read about it (and I read them all) no one ever spoke about the rules of BDSM only about the legal ins and outs.
Cat Lady
I think I’m really glad I’m long time married. My safe words are “move over”.
Dreggas
@valdivia:
I’m not surprised. In a lot of places it would be taboo to openly talk about the “rules” because everyone is too focused on what the news is saying, or are blinded by their individual ideologies. Many see it as abuse of women period and see men who are in that type of relationship as just being whipped or as the stereotypical guy who goes and sees a dominatrix at times.
They don’t talk about the rules because they don’t know the rules. They know the law and how the law sees it. Of course in this case the phrase “safe word” was brought up making a discussion of the rules easier :)
valdivia
@Dreggas:
here you go. case from last year.
arguingwithsignposts
@valdivia:
DFH.
valdivia
@arguingwithsignposts:
okay that made me laugh. see I was focused in other parts of her story, one track mind gal that I am. and I say that without even blushing.
Nellcote
There’s no indication (yet) that they were part of a greater BSDM community and might not be aware of rules beyond having a safeword.
arguingwithsignposts
@valdivia:
You mean the legal issues surrounding the case, right? ;-)
(glad I could make someone laugh. been a long day)
valdivia
@Dreggas:
excellent point. being able to talk about the rules in an open way is very helpful and also makes the situation we are discussing clearer.
arguingwithsignposts
@anonymous:
Learn something new at BJ every day.
Wile E. Quixote
What’s the bounce for felony assault in Missouri? If Jetton is convicted how likely is it that he’ll end up doing some hard time where he might
repeatedly be raped in the ass and mouth and end up with full blown AIDShave the opportunity to explore his submissive side?kommrade reproductive vigor
Uh. Yeah. Did she know this was the safe word?
‘Cause I’m not into the whole rough sex thing but even I can figure out safe words are … what’s the word I’m looking for? Oh yeah, completely fucking usesless if one of the parties keeps it a secret.
Christ, a brain damaged chimp could figure that out.
Sorry if this has been said before.
Dreggas
@Nellcote:
Very true. I just hope that they don’t turn this into another cudgel that they will use to hit the BDSM community over the head.
kommrade reproductive vigor
@Dreggas: …
[Backs away from the straight line]
valdivia
@arguingwithsignposts:
but of course! what else would it be? ;-)
Dreggas
@kommrade reproductive vigor:
Que?
Silver Owl
He is an ugly fuck inside and out.
He was purposely out of control and deliberately refused to control himself when she was unconscious and then had the nerve to blame it on her. He is an abusive bastard.
Waynski
Does this mean the conservatives are now standing athwart history shouting Green Balloons!
Corner Stone
@Cat Lady:
Call me crazy but I find this more disturbing than discussion of safewords.
But I’m pretty sure that’s just me.
Darkrose
Wow. There are probably enough kinky folks here to have a decent playparty.
AngusTheGodOfMeat
@arguingwithsignposts:
@arguingwithsignposts:
(a repost, just to be sure we reach you)
Hey, good move.
I am mooless. I have never convinced anyone of anything before.
When are you in Phoenix? Alfalfa is on me.
Dreggas
@Darkrose:
Yeah there are hehehe.
Blue Raven
@Darkrose:
I am less than surprised this blog attracts the thoughtful kinksters. Not saying people who do SSC or RACK BDSM are automatically more likely to be liberal, but if you have to think that long and thoroughly about your sex life, it’s likely you’ve applied some of the same processes to other areas of your life. And if you care about politics, the same consideration would likely lead to being liberal more often than not. And yeah, I’m another Balloon Juicer with a flogger in her bedroom. Go fig. Pagan, poly, bi, and kinky. I’m even a gamer. It’s amazing how often that quintet comes up in concert.
Dreggas
@Blue Raven:
heh oddly enough that all describes me, just change the “in her bedroom” to “in his bedroom”.
Stefan
Wow. There are probably enough kinky folks here to have a decent playparty.
Allright. Who’s in Brooklyn this weekend….? ;-)
Blue Raven
@Dreggas: LOL. Not surprised. At. All. Too many pagans around here for the quintafecta to not come up more than once.
Darkrose
@Dreggas:
The only problem is that we’d probably spend most of the evening cooing over cute pictures of our (actual feline and canine) pets.
valdivia
@Darkrose:
so true, and fantastically cool.
@Stefan:
Lol. do you really want an answer to that? ;-)
@ darkrose, re ‘actual’ pets. hilarious. and also something I could totally see happening.
Dreggas
@Darkrose:
No joke.
valdivia
I have no clue if anyone else is hanging out here anymore but curious to know if the fellow kinky folks have read Las Edades de Lulu (translated as The Ages of Lulu) by Almudena Grandes. I highly recommend it.
Svensker
@Cat Lady:
Yup.
Something Fabulous
And what just came up on my Pandora “shakira” channel? 99 Luftballons! Concidence? We can only speculate…
Stefan
Lol. do you really want an answer to that? ;-)
Er, kinda….
valdivia
@Stefan:
provocative at the end of a dead thread.
is that a kinda yes or kinda no? :-)
Stefan
Kinda yes….;-)
And thus began Ballon Juice’s sudden and suprising transformation from a progressive politics blog into the Web’s premier BDSM forum……
valdivia
@Stefan:
I was looking for some clever Aury reference instead I will stick with a non witty–who knew southern republican politicians would be so useful eh? Thanks Rod Jetton, BJ progressives owe you one. Though I am reserving judgment on the whole premier thing, for now.
as for your actual initial question–not this weekend.
other weekends though… ;-)