Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I desperately hope that, yet again, I am wrong.

Republicans don’t trust women.

Bad people in a position to do bad things will do bad things because they are bad people. End of story.

“I was told there would be no fact checking.”

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

The Supreme Court cannot be allowed to become the ultimate, unaccountable arbiter of everything.

The next time the wall street journal editorial board speaks the truth will be the first.

Republicans: slavery is when you own me. freedom is when I own you.

Can we lighten up on the doomsday scenarios?

Republicans in disarray!

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

If marriage is the equivalent of selling yourself into slavery, women with self respect should reject the offer.

Yeah, with this crowd one never knows.

Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.

We won’t go back.

Elections aren’t won by handwringing, cowering, and/or bashing your own candidates.

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

“Let’s not pretend [Trump] wants to engage in high-minded discourse.”

Prediction: the gop will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

Maybe you would prefer that we take Joelle’s side in ALL CAPS?

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You are here: Home / TV & Movies / Movies / Move Over Oliver Stone

Move Over Oliver Stone

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There is another America-hating leftist movie mogul moving up the wingnut most wanted list- James Cameron’s Avatar is apparently worse than being force-fed a Hitler sandwich with Stalin mayonnaise after a mandatory abortion.

Not everyone can make a cinematic masterpiece with the right political values like An American Carol.

PS: Michael Moore is fat. Also, too.

Reader Interactions

168Comments

  2. 2.

    Kyle

    During a class on evolution while doing stem-cell research and receiving single-payer health care. The horror.

  3. 3.

    calipygian

    It is pro-indigenous native, anti-corporate, anti-imperialist, anti-U.S. Iraq War effort, anti-U.S.-in-Afghanistan (and anti-troop-surge-in-that-country, or strongly against the thinking of President Barack Obama and Gen. Stanley McChrystal), anti-rightie, anti-Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld, etc.

    Shorter Footsoldiers of the Warrior Queen of the Idiocracy: What is more American than killing the shit out of brown people, raping their wimmin and stealing their land?

  4. 4.

    WereBear

    I’m not clicking.

    However, I did see a mini-doc on the movie, and it looks very interesting. Kinda old-school (if you remember those books in the ’50’s about engineering astronauts so they can live on alien planets) and incredible effects.

    What I’d like is it for it to be quite popular and rub some wingnut faces in the fact that nobody wants to live in your movies.

    Wingnut movies suck magma.

  6. 6.

    lamh31

    Jeez,

    I have no plans of seeing Avatar (I tend to shy away from the more hyped release ’til DVD time), but sh*& like this really makes me wanna spend my money.

    Besides, does anyone really believe that “conservatieve/repulican” geeks are NOT going to go see this movie cause of the RW blogosh*&t…

    Hell this movie is everywhere. They even had a whole segment of last weeks “Bones” episode on Fox about some of the characters standing in line for hours to see it.

  7. 7.

    K. Grant

    Just exactly how does one feel proud of imperialism and the Indian Removal Acts and other assorted horrific violence perpetrated against the Native Americans in the name of progress? I have never figured out how this makes Amurrica a great place with swell people.

    Then again, these are same people who probably learned everything they know about the Christian faith from Jack Chick comics.

    *Sigh*

  8. 8.

    matoko_chan

    You see….this isn’t a culture war…..this is an evolution of culture event… like glaciation or the extinction event at the K-T boundary.
    The conservatives have been wholly disenfranchised from the mediums of contemporary American culture, like film, news media, academe, music…so they try to make their own….and fail….like An American Carol, FOXnews, Oral Roberts “University”, and the Young Cons.
    It is like trying to battle glacial flow with pitchforks and torches.

  9. 9.

    Jon O.

    An American Carol is a cinematic abortion. I tried watching that for as long as I could, and it never stopped with the “ho ho ho this is politically incorrect” pablum. I am so sad that Leslie Nielsen is in it.

  10. 10.

    matoko_chan

    I’m going to see it both at IMAX and in regular theater, and when it comes out on dvd I’m going to buy it…..and I’m going to buy and play the game, and the figurines and collectables….this is my generations Star Wars.

  11. 11.

    dmsilev

    You’ve got to give them credit for putting the FAIL warning right in the headline:

    Update: Big Hollywood confirms

    -dms

  12. 12.

    tbogg

    All those fighting sequences but the subtext leaves them unable to achieve an erection (also known as holly wood).

    Fanboys denied. Not even a desultory fap to be had….So sad.

  13. 13.

    Mal Carne

    Dude. It’s sci-fi Smurfs with guns, for Pete’s sake. That’s the newest left-wing threat to our children? Oh, smurf off already.

  14. 14.

    GeneJockey

    I’m amazed any of them even consider going to anything by James Cameron after ‘Aliens’ – I mean, there was a guy in there who was willing to kill a bunch of colonists, and a whole squad of Marines in order to make a buck, and Cameron made him into a BAD GUY!

  16. 16.

    Steve V

    Apparently leftist cliches, not the fact that it’s a big-budget Hollywood blockbuster, render Avatar predictable. Good to know!

  17. 17.

    lamh31

    Besides, I more likely to go see Disney’s “The Princess & The Frog” gotta show Disney that my moneys good too. Finally after what 75 years, Disney’s gives us an African American princess, bout DAMN time!

  18. 18.

    calipygian

    @tbogg: Slate called it “Cats with Boobs”.

    How could the thought of cat breeding not give your average Tea Bagger a hard on?

  20. 20.

    Dreggas

    @calipygian:

    i thought they only got hard ons for man on dog sex?
    Then again I am sure there are plenty of furries and anthropomorphs in the repub party.

  24. 24.

    MikeJ

    s/smurfs/avatars

    Well, listen, like… a friend of mine has this real weird theory about Smurfs. But I’ve been thinking about it, and I think it’s kind of cool. Actually, I kind of agree with it. It’s like about Krishna. You know, like Smurfs are blue. And he’s saying that Smurfs are, like, getting kids used to seeing blue people. And it’s like, you know, with Smurfs being blue… kids see blue people, they, like, relate to Smurfs. And they relate to blue people when Krishna comes about, you know.

  25. 25.

    Morbo

    I’m sure Edroso will find this eventually. That will be terrific. The real reason for this rage of course is that South Park episode that mocked Glenn Beck.

    Ooh, ooh, this thread gives me an idea. If I can just write a screen adaptation of Custer’s Revenge, I can sell it to the makers of An American Carol for $2 million. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

  28. 28.

    MikeBoyScout

    I heard it is even more dramatically also too liberal than even the bilious bloviating Hot Air lets on.

    Apparently in the original script the invading troops win when their Chimpanzee in Chief declares victory with a banner in his bathroom while practicing his speech about how rainbow leaping unicorns are blowing farts that smell of roses and honey as a result of tax cuts and legalized torture.

    And the evil liberal, James Cameron, was forced by ACORN to change it to distract us from the mounting evidence that climate = weather.

  30. 30.

    ajr22

    From the comment section “Also, one of the bigger gunships looks very similar to the drop ship from Aliens. Cameron stole quite a few ideas for his film.” An intelligent bunch over at hot air.

  33. 33.

    Parthenon

    Good lord these people are weird. When I watch Death Wish or the Rambo movies I don’t find myself critiquing the politics.

    I might be the only person I know who is looking forward to this movie with an open mind. It reminds me a bit of the Tom Cruise eyepatch movie in terms of vitriol, and that one turned out not bad.

  36. 36.

    MichaelR

    MikeJ, your friend is not only wrong, he’s demented/LoonyTunes.

    My prediction – if the far-Right embraces the anti-Avatar theme, then it will become one of the most popular, highest-grossing movies ever. And will more than make a profit over the production and marketing costs.

  37. 37.

    Yutsano

    @Litlebritdifrnt: It’s a LOT of boredom. A LOT. It’s almost schizophrenic to go from intense life-ordeath action to doing basically…nothing. I find it fascinating in that condition there isn’t more PTSD coming out of these wars.

    On a lighter note, I’m happy for these vids. It’s great watching the lads have fun.

  38. 38.

    Midnight Marauder

    @calipygian:

    It is pro-indigenous native, anti-corporate, anti-imperialist, anti-U.S. Iraq War effort, anti-U.S.-in-Afghanistan (and anti-troop-surge-in-that-country, or strongly against the thinking of President Barack Obama and Gen. Stanley McChrystal), anti-rightie, anti-Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld, etc.

    This is all pretty amazing on James Cameron’s part, considering he’s been working on Avatar for, what, 10 40 years now?

    @ajr22:

    From the comment section “Also, one of the bigger gunships looks very similar to the drop ship from Aliens. Cameron stole quite a few ideas for his film.” An intelligent bunch over at hot air.

    This…this cannot be real.

  39. 39.

    MNPundit

    When it comes to space aliens I am a totalitarian fascist.

    We can allow them their home solar systems, and if they deplete those resources we will resettle them elsewhere, but outside their home system they cannot carry more than personal weapons and human authorities will handle protection for their trade etc. They have right to free movement, but will only ever be subject to human laws. If they oppose us, we xenocide them.

    The human potential is limitless. Anything that gets in the way of human hegemony over the physical universe must be annihilated. The odd thing is, that belief is what makes me want to limit carbon emissions, redistribute wealth, reign in corporations, not torture terrorists, enforce human rights (over all humans, natch) and develop technology and medicine by funding stuff like stem cells and CERN.

    Despite knowing they would lose, in District 9 I was rooting for the mercenaries.

    That said, in D9 I would have treated the Prawns much better. They clearly had better tech than us. As long as there is a chance humanity can be stopped we need to play nice with the aliens. Once we understand and can master their tech we should smash any opposition they care to put up to our plans.

  40. 40.

    Xanthippas

    I love how right-wingers don’t see how it might be a bad call to be immediately defensive about a movie that’s critical of the extermination of a native race of people and the theft of their land and resources.

  42. 42.

    Yutsano

    @Xanthippas: The beauty of the wingnut ladies is they can always be counted on to protest too much. Sometimes it’s entertaining, otherwise it’s annoying.

  43. 43.

    El Cid

    This is very insightful. Quoting “Ace”:

    If Sarah Palin sees Avatar and then sits down and actually thinks about what it’s saying (which is always a dicey proposition, I admit), she’ll hate this movie.

    This proves something. I don’t know what it is, but it must be important.

  44. 44.

    RSR

    Didn’t they hate Wall-E too? Sure, it had a robot which would help repopulate the earth named Eve, but where was Adam, huh? Huh!?! More proof that teh gay lesbos are trying to get rid of men altogether!

  45. 45.

    Comrade Dread

    I’m amazed any of them even consider going to anything by James Cameron after ‘Aliens’ – I mean, there was a guy in there who was willing to kill a bunch of colonists, and a whole squad of Marines in order to make a buck, and Cameron made him into a BAD GUY!

    Not to mention Titanic where the bastard made it seem like a bad thing that the moneyed classes got first crack at the lifeboats while the commoners drowned.

    Commie bastard.

    And it’s not that much of a surprise to me anymore that they object to saying that invading other places and bombing them in the name of saving them is a bad thing.

    Any action our government takes is by default good and just even if the same action taken by another party would be considered evil and heinous by them, because we are exceptional.

    You can’t argue with that mentality, as it’s long sacrificed any empathy, reason, or Christian morality at the altar of rank nationalism.

  46. 46.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    @Yutsano:

    I have to admit that my favorite set of blokes for having the ability to have fun in the face of anything are the Bootnecks (The Royal Marines), I swear they could be stuck in a fox hole with a million enemy troops over the top and still be taking the piss out of each other about something. They have the most incredible ability to laugh in the face of adversity. One of the things my husband (a US Marine) had to learn early was the RM sense of humor, once he got the hang of it he was fine, sometimes he even gets me with it these days!

  48. 48.

    Dreggas

    Any action our government takes is by default good and just even if the same action taken by another party would be considered evil and heinous by them, because we are exceptional.

    unless our government is being run by a democrat, then it’s evil.

  49. 49.

    Yutsano

    @Litlebritdifrnt: I have a good friend (not my Dawg just for clarity’s sake) who was on a jet with an RM officer flying from DC to London. Being the affable sort he is he conversed with the RM on the flight. He later reported to me he was laughing the whole time the RM was so funny and dry. I guess you could call that my RM experience, though I personally am biased to the US version.

  51. 51.

    demkat620

    I’m sorry, I just can’t gin up any interest to see that movie.

    Because honest to god, it’s a movie. About blue aliens. Who cares?

    If their beliefs are so strong and can stand up to anything, why do they care what opposing viewponts are expressed? Why does any kind of oppositional position scare them?

  54. 54.

    debit

    @Yutsano: You could do both! With a healthy eye roll at the same time. I has the bestest ice cream in the world, so nothing’s going to bug me tonight.

    And edit! Truly I am blessed.

  56. 56.

    mistersnrub

    I can’t wait to see their reaction to the Red Dawn remake. I bet it will influence Sarah Palin’s ghost writer to dub China the “Reprehensible Republic.”

  58. 58.

    freelancer

    @mistersnrub:

    I can’t wait to see their reaction to the Red Dawn remake. I bet it will influence Sarah Palin’s ghost writer to dub China the “Reprehensible Republic.”

    She’s gonna be absolutely disgusted by such an offensive movie, what with her high regard for Asian/Pacific Culture. She’ll lead a boycott against the movie aimed at teabaggers, I’m sure. It’s a lock. Mark my words.

  59. 59.

    debit

    @mistersnrub: I really liked their reaction to the start of BSG’s third season (I think it was the third season) when the show was a bit too much of a mirror to reality. They went from “Humans, fuck yeah!” to “Wait…hey, what the shit is this?”

    (This has been an attempt to be non spoilery.)

  60. 60.

    matoko_chan

    demkat, it is my generation’s Star Wars.
    The tech alone is worth it.
    3D + IMAX + layalong console game……..geek culture apocalypse.

    The film is being touted as a breakthrough in terms of filmmaking technology, for its development of 3D viewing and stereoscopic filmmaking with cameras that were specially designed for the film’s production.

    Instead of Star War’s evil empire theme…it is the battle of indigenous people against the military-industrial complex.
    And…..it promotes the most feared and loathed memes that strike horror into conservative hearts…..

    genetic engineering is good
    the other is you

    And best of all……it is pg-13.
    All your white evangelical christian youth are belong to us.

  61. 61.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    @Yutsano:

    The love of my life (notwithstanding DH) was an RM Officer, (known as a scaley back, communications – above my pay grade to understand the name) anyhoo, I understand that the RM Officers basic training course is considered one of the most brutal in the world in any of the armed forces, including the special forces, I read a story several years ago where this guy over here (the US) had completed the rangers course, the delta force course, the seals course, etc., etc., and even he considered dropping out of the RM Officers course it was that tough. I faced a choice of a two year tour in Hong Kong or staying in the UK with my RM officer, I chose Hong Kong.

  62. 62.

    maus

    Ungh, Breitbart is going to have such a stiffy when Avatar fails for being terrible (not for being “liberal”.)

    Of course, condescendingly preachy twaddle can be *considered* liberal, but it’s by no means limited to left-leaning views.

    That said, again this movie looks pretty crappo. Didn’t Cameron learn anything from Lucas’ mistakes? Call it uncanny valley, but I don’t want to see cgi characters playing human. I’m going to see them as a glorified videogame and have very little empathy or interest.

    Maybe i’m not the demographic, maybe it’ll bank in this age of Twilight, but I’m not seeing the Titanic era crowds coming back for more.

  63. 63.

    Ash

    Honestly though, I really hate James Cameron.

    Also, it made me weep when Big Hollywood had a big post on how Friday Night Lights is awesome for conservatives. STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY SHOW, BREITBART.

  65. 65.

    Liberty60

    @Comrade Dread:

    Not to mention Titanic where the bastard made it seem like a bad thing that the moneyed classes got first crack at the lifeboats while the commoners drowned.

    What, you thought you were being sarcastic?

    Via AceofSpades, here is Jeffrey Wells @ Hollywood Elsewhere:

    Cameron is an earth-hugging lefty from way back (the flagrant despise-the-arrogant-rich current in Titanic being but one example) so this should come as no surprise to anyone

    Sometimes the wingnuts surpass your ability to mock them.

  67. 67.

    geg6

    Well, I wasn’t gonna see it until it came out on OnDemand, but that just sold another couple of tickets. And if my students are any kind of barometer, Cameron will be the king of the world again. But then my school is best known for engineering and football, so, you know, young adult male geeks.

  68. 68.

    matoko_chan

    maus…see my comment ^^
    Avatar is the first of a trilogy….like Star Wars.
    Who is the target audience?
    youth culture, gamer culture, college-educated…
    I think this is my generation’s Star Wars.

  73. 73.

    The Populist

    I tried watching An American Carol. Argh…what crap. Not funny and I would expect some chuckles from a Zucker.

    Oh and Avatar is going to clean up at the B.O. Man is that gonna be FUN.

    If only Weinstein could market the Road better. A movie that turns right wing gun freaks into cannibals (not intentionally but hell, look at them!) and liberal Viggo Mortensen lives by a code with his son that if he is going to get captured by the cannibal rednecks he will shoot him with his last remaining bullet so to spare him the agony of dying that kind of death.

  74. 74.

    matoko_chan

    You really think it’s going to suck that much?

    I think its going to make that much money.
    ;)

  75. 75.

    Annie

    @Yutsano:

    LOL. This is too funny.

    After just watching Richard Engle’s “Tip of the Spear,” and wondering how those guys kept sane in that bleak outpost, this YouTube, was the perfect antidote. Thanks…

    Maybe they need some women?????????? Or maybe not.

  76. 76.

    Yutsano

    @Litlebritdifrnt: I find your description of the RM officer training course intriguing, mostly because the Dawg is honestly the toughest man I know and might just be up to that challenge. I might have to drop a seed in his brain if he’d bite. He probably would, which excites and scares me at the same time.

    FWIW I think you chose right, although long distance relationships had a much different dynamic in pre-Internet days. It’s part of the reason why I am where I am and the Dawg is where he is. We’re good for each other but we won’t get in each others’ way. Don’t ask me to define our relationship, it’s weird enough as it is. :)

  77. 77.

    The Populist

    @rob!:

    Caviezel had his chance and decided to be a pain on sets with rules where he would NOT kiss a woman not his wife, would not be shot in any kind of bed sharing scenes, etc. He was not this bad until the Christ movie made him think he was a big time actor.

    Oh and Kelsey Grammar can’t carry tv shows anymore either, Dennis Miller can’t sell out a small hall to save his life and even GLenn Beck can’t get anybody out to watch his lame Christmas Sweater nonsense.

  79. 79.

    The Populist

    I am trying to think of a right leaning movie I liked and came to:

    Red Dawn which still proves you can’t beat the system (the Wolverines pretty much die in the end).

    and

    Conan

    John Milius is the only rightie in hollywood who is interesting. At least the guy will hear the other side of the coin and debate. These others are all one sided, a-holes like Jonny Voight who think they have all the answers.

  80. 80.

    The Populist

    @Yutsano: “Marines running around blowing shit up. What could be more of a neo-con wet dream?”

    Well…they do harm and that is not what the right wants to see.

  82. 82.

    matoko_chan

    …….conservatives like Allahp and Ace are so sour…so pissy….it is like pop-culture is a chick that wont date them.
    She rejects them, movie after movie, tune after tune.
    Allahp got his heart broke when Megan Fox wanted to sic Megatron on the heartland bible thumpers…..he has never recovered.

  83. 83.

    Lurker

    @demkat620:

    FWIW, I heard that AVATAR offers a truly immersive and innovative 3D experience, more so than any other 3D film to date. So folks who see the film in 3D are in for a treat.

    I do not know how it will hold up as a film, but I expect AVATAR to do gangbusters at the box office.

  84. 84.

    The Populist

    @lamh31: Fact for righties: Talk a movie down all you like but no matter. Kids pay to see movies like Avatar and even many adults. If it looks good, they will flock to see it.

    Avatar has gimmicks (3-D) that will guarantee a large opening weekend. FU Rightie whiners!

  86. 86.

    The Populist

    @freelancer: “Fuck that, if the Weinsteins would let people see the movie! Release Date was ostensibly Nov 25, and the closest its playing to here is KC, or Chicago.”

    I saw it at a theater near me. Yes, Bob and Harvey (the ultimate libs they claim to be) do this all the time to worthy films like this.

    This movie is a great f-u to right wingers.

    End of the world where either nukes or global warming destroys the world.

    Devoted father who cares only for his kid and wants to get him away from the mess of a dead world. He won’t abandon values but when he does encounter strangers he is courteous to them. No shoot first bs here. He’s a man of integrity. Most people would be running to join the following to survive:

    Cannibal redneck gangs roam the countryside enslaving the weak and eating anybody they find. They aren’t movie caricatures, they are what people become unfortunately (pack mentality, militia types).

    Ending where something good happens and there is sacrifice.

    Righties may THINK McCormac’s book/movie is THEIR type of thing but it’s really a concept that attacks their worldview.

  87. 87.

    schrodinger's cat

    John, how is the boss cat? His fans await eagerly for their weekly dose of Friday night Tunch.

  88. 88.

    lamh31

    I think that Avatar will win the B.O. this weekend, but I expect “The Princess & The Frog” to be a close second, particular if people with children go to see a more kid-friendly movie. The marketing for “princess” has been heavy on Disney and Disney owned-channels like ABC, ABCFamily, etc. Also, it’s getting heavy marketing on urban radio also. I kinda wished that “Princess” wasn’t opening opposite Avatar, but I suspect “Princess” to have more staying power. All these big-budget movies have opened big, but they haven’t had much staying power. It’s the aminated cartoons, and the “kid-friendly” flicks that have had more staying power this “movie-season”.

    The only really big budget movie from this year that seems to have the most staying power was “Star Trek”. That movie just seemed like it was gonna be in the top 10 all damn year.

    My biggest fear for “princess & the frog” is that for whatever reason certain “people” don’t go to see it, and only urban audiences see it. Movies by Tyler Perry’s “madea” series seem to prove that “urban” audiences can create big box office, but with Avatar opening, unfortunately having a pimarily “urban” audience won’t make it number one, but like I said a close second.

  89. 89.

    Ash

    @lamh31:

    My biggest fear for “princess & the frog” is that for whatever reason certain “people” don’t go to see it, and only urban audiences see it. Movies by Tyler Perry’s “madea” series seem to prove that “urban” audiences can create big box office, but with Avatar opening, unfortunately having a pimarily “urban” audience won’t make it number one, but like I said a close second.

    I really don’t think a Disney animated rincess movie is going to have the same problem that other “black movies” do.

  90. 90.

    lamh31

    Ash

    True, but I just have this coversation in my head from “The View” that Hasselbach had where she said that her daughter has a “Tiana” doll, and people were giving her “funny looks” and actually had the nerve to comment on her obviously white kid carrying around a “black” doll

    But you’re right. Disney knows how to market these things, and it getting pretty good reviews.

    Okay wait, I didn’t look, but does Avatar come out today, or next week. Cause I the websites I found says Avatars release date is Dec 18?

  91. 91.

    kommrade reproductive vigor

    Yeah. And if the movie is a success they’ll suddenly start to identify with the good guys (currently the bad guys) and begin to draw parallels between the way they are treated by the mean old gubbermint and the way the good guys in the movie are treated by the mean old bad guys (currently the good guys).

    Mark my words; we’ll get at least one “The similarities between the plight of Caucasians (or Christians or Conservatives) in America and the movie’s protagonists are striking fap fap fap” blog post before this is all over.

  92. 92.

    Blackacre

    Why don’t these clowns just ask their leader Rush to bankroll a blockbuster they’d want to see?

  95. 95.

    John O

    It is not a good sign of mental health to be unable to laugh at the link.

    It is a good sign of mental health to be able to laugh at the commentary here.

    Not a Cameron fan. There were things about Titanic I liked, but the love story was not one of them.

  96. 96.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    It is pro-indigenous native, anti-corporate, anti-imperialist, anti-U.S. Iraq War effort

    Oh my GOD! How could anyone be against those things? ? ? How?!?!?

  97. 97.

    John O

    @lamh31:

    I’ve been following Tiger’s press since he was about 14. While people are going to dismiss this as image-rebuilding, I see a little bit of his parent’s influence here. He had good parents. I’ve seen Earl compared to Todd Marinovich’s father, and it’s all wrong. Earl always made golf fun for Tiger.

    And Mom has a bit of the Zen in her.

    All that being said, he’s a moron if he’s not teeing it up at Augusta, and I think the rest of his life would be a lot easier if he said publicly something like, “I deserve to be divorced, and I’ll take care of my kids (duh) and my wife, and we’ll work on being good friends and parents, and when I’m a little less prone to chasing ‘big Tiger’ around, maybe I’ll ask her to marry me again. I wouldn’t have married her in the first place if I didn’t think she was more than the rest.”

    Just sayin’.

  98. 98.

    Martin

    All that being said, he’s a moron if he’s not teeing it up at Augusta, and I think the rest of his life would be a lot easier if he said publicly something like

    Yeah, that’s all true, but then it’s equally true to say “He’s a moron if he cheats on his wife, leaves a trail of evidence behind documenting his infidelity, and allows things to build up to a point that it goes nuclear. The rest of his life would be a lot easier if he just stayed on the straight and narrow.”

    But that didn’t happen. Clearly on such issues, Tiger is quite evidently a moron.

  99. 99.

    John O

    @Martin:

    History had pretty demonstrably demonstrated that “intelligence” or lack of moronitude has anything to do with this kind of thing.

    Kings have always had their harems.

    And young men are young men.

  100. 100.

    lamh31

    John O,

    We agree. It really tee-ed me off hearing the local DJ trying to compare Earl Woods to Joe Jackson. There is no comparison.

    It’s no better than the rest of them trying to compare Tiger to OJ or Obama. The only common denominator in all of them is being at least 1/2 African American.

    I also think that it’s a bad idea to leave “indefinitly”, but there are rumors that Tigers “injuries” from the crash and whatever are probably really aesthetically bad, so maybe his PR people (who I think is doing him a disservice) told him to lay low til they heal.

    Either way, for my money, Tiger needs to go out and try to win every damn golf game he can. Like Kobe, it’s the athletic talent that will tell the tale when it’s all said and done. After Kobe’s “issues” what did he do, he patched it up with his wife, and he played some damn good b-ball. Tiger needs to do the same.

  101. 101.

    The Republic of Stupidity

    Why don’t these clowns just ask their leader Rush to bankroll a blockbuster they’d want to see?

    Because the only flick Rush would be interested in bankrolling would be one starring him, along w/ a dozen or so frightened, helpless, little brown boys…

  102. 102.

    John O

    @Martin:

    (Slightly) Shorter: Like we can all imagine how we’d behave were we mega-millionaires, undisputed #1 in the world at virtually anything, young, strong, fun and handsome.

  103. 103.

    Martin

    @John O:

    All I’m saying is that expecting Tiger to make a good decision about his personal life at this juncture is like expecting the GOP to embrace responsible governance and proper role of taxation and abortion in our society.

    I’m not saying it can’t happen, but there’s scant evidence that we should expect it to happen.

  104. 104.

    matoko_chan

    Umm…there was a pre-release in selected IMAX theaters so a lot of critics have seen it. Dec 18 is the official, so this weekend the Princess should sweep the BO.
    Some selected theaters will have pre-screenings of Avatar, but the big BO opening in all theaters will be next weekend.
    ;)

  105. 105.

    matoko_chan

    Why are the wingnuts frothing about Tiger Woods?
    Is he supposed to be some token black conservative?
    or….is it that same old black-guy-on-white chick-action that has their panties in a twist?

  106. 106.

    The Populist

    @lamh31:

    And what’s more liberal than the ideals behind ST? Block-fucking-buster!

    People from a future where it’s basically a utopia and while they have choices, nobody needs money and you can disagree with your leaders AND still work to make things better without being called a traitor.

    Yep, Star Trek where diversity is cherished, people bravely put aside self interest to explore new things AND education is very important and encouraged.

    The Enterprise isn’t out there looking to dominate other races. They seek them out to learn and get along.

  107. 107.

    lamh31

    matoko_chan,

    thanks for the info. Well, I amend my previous statement. I expect Princess to win the B.O. then.

  109. 109.

    Martin

    @John O: The primary reason that I’m not any of those things is that my values lie elsewhere, so I’ve never sought any of it. Let’s not pretend that someone who has worked as hard as Tiger to get to where he is has the same balance to life as we do. He simply doesn’t. There’s going to be a cost to that somewhere.

    There’s no argument to be had about putting us in his shoes. We’re not in his shoes because we could never be in his shoes. It’s like asking how a chicken would act if it was a cow. It’s a ridiculous question.

  110. 110.

    John O

    @Martin:

    You’re not compartmentalizing as well as you could, Martin. I always thought Clinton’s SoU right after the Monica thing was one of the great speeches of all time, given what must’ve been going through his head when he gave it.

    There is a difference between judgement from your nether-regions and from your head. He knows he looks bad, and is probably handling it as rationally as he can. He’s far from stupid, in general.

    I don’t know too many men who couldn’t admit to me in a weak moment that they can still love their wives, while wanting to fool around with other women. Plus, I’ve seen it personally too often to dismiss.

  111. 111.

    Svensker

    So, wait, the “freedom loving” right is now overtly pro-imperialist and anti-indigenous people? Do they cheer on Palpitine and Darth now when they watch their old copies of Star Wars? WTF?

  112. 112.

    John O

    Martin, that’s just weird. I don’t know anyone who hasn’t imagined winning the lottery, period, as just one example. You’re out here, so I doubt your imagination is as limited as you suggest.

    Yes, you can imagine that. You can even imagine how you’d behave. But that’s the part that’s ridiculous, the chicken and cow part. You can only idealistically pretend in your imagination how you’d behave.

  113. 113.

    Dr. Squid

    @Comrade Dread:

    It wasn’t just that the moneyed classes got the lifeboats. It’s that the people in steerage were actually acknowledged and portrayed as human beings.

  115. 115.

    Gus

    @maus:
    That’s kind of how I feel about it. Frankly, I think the animation looks awful. It reminds me of the sequences between levels in Starcraft.

  116. 116.

    Martin

    @John O:

    But Tiger didn’t win the lottery, and we wouldn’t view a lottery winner the way we view Tiger. We view Tiger the way we do because he EARNED it. He worked at it since he was 3. He did everything right in the golf world and he has his $1B now. It wasn’t random and it wasn’t magical thinking that made it happen.

    People treat Tiger differently than they would a lottery winner or any other individual that becomes famous due to random circumstances, and we all judge Tiger differently as well. You’re asking me to imagine the result, without acknowledging the circumstances that led to the result – and those circumstances are related to who we are and how we act.

    My point is that I CAN’T be #1 in the world and wealthy being the person I am. I just can’t. To ask me to pretend to live in that circumstance requires that I pretend away parts of what I value. The truth is, if you put me in Tiger’s shoes on the day he got married, I’d retire. I’d go on TV, say ‘Thanks for all the money, bitches, I’m taking my family and living my life away from all of you.’ That’s precisely what I’d do, but you want me to imagine not doing that, continuing to follow Tiger’s path, and asking myself if I’d cheat on my wife. I don’t know – you’re asking me to imagine valuing things I don’t value. I can’t do that. I don’t think anyone honestly can.

  117. 117.

    John O

    @Martin:

    That was pretty sensible, Martin. Just one quibble:

    The truth is, if you put me in Tiger’s shoes on the day he got married, I’d retire. I’d go on TV, say ‘Thanks for all the money, bitches, I’m taking my family and living my life away from all of you.’ That’s precisely what I’d do, but you want me to imagine not doing that, continuing to follow Tiger’s path, and asking myself if I’d cheat on my wife. I don’t know – you’re asking me to imagine valuing things I don’t value. I can’t do that. I don’t think anyone honestly can.

    You’re imagining how you’d behave, which is central to my point.

    :-)

    Sometimes I make myself all heroic and traditionally loyal like that, too.

  118. 118.

    John O

    @John O:

    IOW, you CAN’T imagine yourself as World #1 in anything, but you can imagine how you’d behave if you were. I’m not buyin’.

    In all good fun, honestly. None of it matters, and you sound like an awfully good guy to me.

  122. 122.

    J. Michael Neal

    Is it sufficiently American to say that Avatar looks really tedious and boring for me to retain my citizenship?

    As for The Road, how the hell do you make a movie out of that book? Nothing happens. I mean, even compared to lots of stories where nothing happens, nothing happens. I’m fine with that when I get interesting characters, but neither the protagonist nor his son have any personality whatsoever. I can see a framework on upon which interesting characters could have been built. They express all sorts of very valid concerns, and they seem like they care about each other, if in a completely emotionless way.

    Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad I read The Road. It’s not like anything I’ve ever read before, and I always appreciate that. McCarthy also uses a literary style that I could see him doing something interesting with. I can’t get to the point of saying it was *good*, though. I mean, absolutely nothing happens.

  124. 124.

    Wilson Heath

    Sounds a bit like Dune in the themes. Do the sci-fi loving wingers have to hate that now, too?

  125. 125.

    New Yorker

    Red Dawn is the only movie allowed at the Malkin household.

    That, and “The Passion of the Christ”. Nothing like two hours of graphic torture with lots of cuts to a crowd of hissing Jews who looked like they stepped right out of a Nazi propaganda poster. That’s wholesome real ‘murkan family entertainment!

  136. 136.

    The Other Steve

    If I were this Nolte guy I’d be paying more attention to Jason Reitman. He’s done three winners in a row… Thank you for Smoking, Juno and now Up in the Air. Each movie touches on different aspects of our societal norms, even our politics.

  138. 138.

    skippy

    avatar is garnering a huge 90% on the tomato meter at rotten tomatoes.

    at first i thought it looked like “fern gulley: the last smurf forest,” but with all the great reviews, might go see it.

    any head-exploding on the part of the hardly-ever-right wing is just bonus gravy.

  139. 139.

    Jim Treacher

    Sometimes the wingnuts surpass your ability to mock them.

    Jeffrey Wells will be very surprised to learn he’s a wingnut. What, the gratuitous Palin slam in the same review didn’t do anything for ya?

  141. 141.

    matoko_chan

    /sigh

    this is the smart commenter place right?
    consider this….who will see this movie and geek out on it?
    heres a hint…..

    rated PG-13

    what could be sweeter than an entire generation of teen boiz that isnt doped up on homoerotic GI Joe foreign adventurism war porn….but instead exposed to empathy for the other, high tech, superscience, the value of indigenous people and of preserving the environment…….in short all the negations of conservative “values”.

    All your base are belong to us.

  142. 142.

    Ed Drone

    If I’d have known Avatar was a left-wing movie, I’d have bought out a row of tickets to give to friends.

    Now that I know it is, I am duty-bound to go see it. And no, I can’t afford more than my one ticket, to tell the truth.

    Ed

  143. 143.

    matoko_chan

    Sounds a bit like Dune in the themes. Do the sci-fi loving wingers have to hate that now, too?

    They already hate Dune….it has arabic in it lol.

  144. 144.

    John O

    I’ve been through Atlas Shrugged, Infinite Jest, and The Vampire Chronicles, some Dickens, a ton of other DFW, all of Al Franken’s books several times each along with many others, had a huge sci-fi phase in my teens to early 20’s, and at some point in my life tried to read Dune and was way overmatched.

    A bridge too far.

  145. 145.

    matoko_chan

    Hey Treach….

    What, the gratuitous Palin slam in the same review didn’t do anything for ya?

    Ekshually…… no.
    Palin is such a gobsmackingly blatant unapologetic retard that simply pointing that out does not absolve one from wingnuttiness.

  147. 147.

    Yutsano

    @Ole: I don’t know what’s better: the fact that they wrote that or the fact that they got someone to actually sing it then set it all up. Genius.

  150. 150.

    Yutsano

    @moe99: I’ve seen a ton of information out there that just might change my mind about this movie. Or I might employ a work perk and just get it free when the video gets released. I’m sure I’ll miss some of the wow factor from a theatrical release but if it’s really that great it’ll be worth the wait.

  151. 151.

    Jim Treacher

    Palin is such a gobsmackingly blatant unapologetic retard that simply pointing that out does not absolve one from wingnuttiness.

    So you’ve really thought this through.

  153. 153.

    Et Tu Brutus?

    WTF- it’s just a movie, hopefully a spectacular, immersive, cinematic escape from a reality grown depressingly polarized between extremes of batshit crazy. And I don’t recall any wingers getting all worked up over ‘Apocalypto’, which in many ways was more of an indictment of the corruption engendered by civilization than anything Cameron has produced?

  155. 155.

    JR

    My favorite part of that Hot Air review is when Allahpundit quotes Brietbart and begins by trumpeting “Bipartisan consensus!” Priceless.

    And really, does anyone who’s ever seen any film by James Cameron, from Alien to the Abyss, think for a second that his subtext is going to indulge right-wing tropes? Isn’t that kind of like expecting Allahpundit to see nuance? At what point does experience say “na ga ha pen?”

  156. 156.

    Dan

    The RW must be torn. The movie has a LW philosophy. But there is also a lot of shooting and explosions! What to do? What to do?

  157. 157.

    matoko_chan

    @Jim Treacher:
    No need for nuance…..Palin’s epic stupidity is only obscured for godbothering teabaggers and the old white guyz that she gives wood to.
    Which are you?

    See Treach….she’s all you got. Pawlenty is invisble, Thune should have started running 2 years ago, Petraeus turned you down like 20 times, Huckabee has a willie-horton problem, and a segment of your base would vote a satan ticket before nominating a mormon.
    It is truly delicious to watch you and Allahp groping around for reasons to support a proud ignoramus and flaming demagogue without a particle of the “talent” or “virtue” needed to be elected in Thomas Jefferson’s meritocracy, who also stubbornly refuses to play Galatea to the GOP’s Pygmalion.
    hahaha!

  158. 158.

    matoko_chan

    @Et Tu Brutus?:
    and Star Wars was just a movie.
    Avatar is a vector of liberal memes aimed at the heart of the youth demographic.
    one more time.

    rated: PG-13

    ;)

  159. 159.

    Redshirt

    For better or worse, Star Wars is a form of common mythology to many people today, and it seems especially so with the Rigthy internet crowd. Star Wars as sanctioned mythology was given the Ronaldus Magnus stamp of official approval with the Star Wars anti-missle program. All in good fun, of course.

    But I do wonder how fine the wheels of dissonance grind in the wingnut’s heads when they try and compare themselves with Luke and Han and the Rebel Alliance, yet feel their genuine sympathies falling with Vader and most specifically, the Emperor.

  160. 160.

    John S.

    @Jim Treacher:

    That’s a nice blog you have there. I like your photo chronicle of presidents engaged in diplomatic niceties, but all you have up there is Obama bowing to the Japanese emperor. What about Bush holding hands with Saudi Arabian princes, or Reagan, Nixon, or anyone else genuflecting before foreign dignitaries?

    It’s a nice start, but your work is incomplete.

  161. 161.

    John S.

    @RedShirt:

    Star wars was designed to be a form of mythology, right from the start. Lucas consulted heavily with Joseph Campbell on the project. In fact, in the interview series Campbell did with Bill Moyers back in the early 80s – The Power of Myth – the filming was done AT Skywalker Ranch.

    Joseph Campbell made Star Wars what it is. He helped Lucas craft a tale that hit all the right archetypes and resonated with people in the same way all ancient and remembered tales do. Without his guidance, we all see the pile of shit Lucas made on his own.

  162. 162.

    Redshirt

    @John S.

    Oh yeah, I was aware of all that – it’s awesome. Joseph Campbell is one of my personal inspirations and he definitely provided the direct story framework from his book “The Hero with a Thousand Faces”. If everyone out there hasn’t read some Joseph Campbell, you should get to it, starting with THWATF.

    The best thing about it is, like Scientology (but not as successful as that artificial mythology), it worked – Star Wars is clearly a common mythology anywhere movies are watched. For some reason (probably because of a repressed identification with the Empire), the Wingnuts really buy into the SW mythology – for all the wrong reasons.

  163. 163.

    Stefan

    And really, does anyone who’s ever seen any film by James Cameron, from Alien to the Abyss, think for a second that his subtext is going to indulge right-wing tropes?

    Most people don’t seem to know that James Cameron is actually Canadian, not American. He was in the process of getting American citizenship in 2004, but withdrew his application in protest after Bush was re-instated, and continues to be a proud son of the Great White North. *

    *best if read with “Hockey Night in Canada” playing in the background.

  164. 164.

    matoko_chan

    Avatar teases out all the mythology too…. myths and legends are encoded in homo sap. ‘s memomes.
    Pandora is the planets name….avatar comes from hindu mythos…I bet theres a ton more….i haven’t seen it yet.
    Like Star Wars shaped a generation Avatar is going to do the same.
    The shape of a better world, a world without “conservative values”.

  165. 165.

    TR

    I love this line from the review:

    Yes, it’s very teenaged adolescent in its super-imaginative wacko visions and exuberant energy levels, but politically it’s pure Che Guevara

    So the opposite of “leftist” is “pathetically immature”?

    Yeah, we can agree on that.

  167. 167.

    Ole

    @yutsano, asiangrrrl

    Yup, it’s pretty cool … Would’ve been even cooler if they’d been Danish though ;-)

  168. 168.

    Dayv

    I thought the movie looked like an overcooked but very nicely painted turd from the previews, but I might have to go see it if it’s annoying the right wing.

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