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Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

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You are here: Home / Little Things

Little Things

by John Cole|  January 6, 20104:13 pm| 136 Comments

This post is in: General Stupidity

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This is another one of those posts where half of you will flame me and tell me “No shit, Cole,” but I just bought some new windshield wipers, actually paid a couple bucks extra and got good ones (bosc, maybe?), and it is like driving a new car. At any rate, I was surprised how much of a difference it made.

3… 2… 1…

“No shit, Cole.”

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Reader Interactions

136Comments

  1. 1.

    MattR

    January 6, 2010 at 4:15 pm

    You know who else had mindshield wipers?

    EDIT: I am just gonna leave that typo in there.

  2. 2.

    FormerSwingVoter

    January 6, 2010 at 4:15 pm

    No shit, Cole.

  3. 3.

    Breezeblock

    January 6, 2010 at 4:16 pm

    The auto parts store by me installs ’em for ya upon purchase.

    Eh, it’s a small thing, but I’ve never seen an auto parts store do that before.

  4. 4.

    John Cole

    January 6, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    @Breezeblock: Autozone does that.

  5. 5.

    Comrade Mary

    January 6, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    You must be feeling better if you’re now inviting our abuse.

  6. 6.

    Violet

    January 6, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    I upgraded my windshield wipers the last time I changed them out too and it was a revelation.

    I’m kind of disappointed in them now, though. They were great and then all of a sudden they didn’t work very well anymore. I need to get to an auto parts store and get some new ones.

  7. 7.

    MikeJ

    January 6, 2010 at 4:18 pm

    Living in Seattle you learn it quick. Rain X actually helps a lot too, especially for the drizzle type rain we get here. But only for nine months out of the year.

  8. 8.

    Randy P

    January 6, 2010 at 4:18 pm

    People change those things?

    Huh.

    Actually, I tend not to change them unless there is something drastically wrong, like some metal part snapped and scraping on the windshield. I seem to always have a bad part on the blade that leaves an uncleared streak on the windshield, even after getting the new ones.

    I don’t know that I’ve ever been offered a quality choice, either at the dealer or the parts store. I just give them my model and they hand me a package.

  9. 9.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    January 6, 2010 at 4:18 pm

    So buying new windshield wipers is like driving a new car? I’m stunned.

  10. 10.

    Bill H

    January 6, 2010 at 4:20 pm

    Of course one has to live where it rains to really give a shit about windshield wipers.

  11. 11.

    Elroy's Lunch

    January 6, 2010 at 4:20 pm

    New windshield wipers AND new tires tomorrow morning. Looking forward to bringing the safety factor back in line.

  12. 12.

    Painlord

    January 6, 2010 at 4:20 pm

    Finally a post I can relate to. There is tons of things I discover every week that make my life better that most people have known about forever. Like Jeebus. And soft toilet tissue. Vacation time. The list goes on.

    -Pain

  13. 13.

    MattR

    January 6, 2010 at 4:21 pm

    Now just imagine if you clean all of Lily’s hair off the inside of the glass :)

    Being a dog owner, I have now accepted I will have to drive my car into the ground rather than sell it or trade it in.

  14. 14.

    Martin

    January 6, 2010 at 4:21 pm

    You know, if Obama said this, it’d be at least 2 years before another pair of windshield wipers were sold below the Mason-Dixon line and RedState would be asking their readers to mail boxes of dead bugs to the White House.

  15. 15.

    Zifnab

    January 6, 2010 at 4:22 pm

    Oh, what happened John? Did the Obamaseih go and tell you to get your windshield whippers changed and now you just do it?

    I bet you keep your tires inflated, too.

    God damn hippie.

  16. 16.

    cmorenc

    January 6, 2010 at 4:22 pm

    You just reminded me of something that’s needed doing on my car for many weeks, except I can’t seem to ever get a round tuit thinking about it until I’m out driving on a rainy day (without enough time to stop and do it) or at night (after places that sell the good ones are closed).

    Going out in a few minutes to do just that.

  17. 17.

    Martin

    January 6, 2010 at 4:24 pm

    @cmorenc: You can order them at Amazon. Decent prices too. We added our last set to one of this year’s xmas orders.

  18. 18.

    Bill Arnold

    January 6, 2010 at 4:25 pm

    In a pinch, e.g. on vacation, you can just run a piece of wet paper or something not-quite-abrasive over the edge of the rubber. It will buy the wipers another week or two of life.

  19. 19.

    Shinobi

    January 6, 2010 at 4:28 pm

    I got some really nice new wipers last year (thanks Dad!) and I thought they would last a year or two.

    I was clearly delusional. Damn you Chicago winters!

  20. 20.

    frankdawg81

    January 6, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    I donno – maybe cuz I never popped for the deluxe model it never seemed all that wonderful to get new blades. Or maybe I just change them too often!

    As a kid I visited the old Soviet Union. The place I stayed included a car & driver. We were out & it started to rain. He stopped, got the wiper blades out of the glove box & put them on the car. I guess they were crude rubber & exposure to the sun caused them to break down or something (he didn’t speak English all that well & was very sensitive to anything that even appeared inferior to Western stuff). I had forgotten about that until just now.

  21. 21.

    Dreggas

    January 6, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    OT but for anyone who remembers the game “Dungeon Keeper” i highly recommend the game Overlord. And if you never played Dungeon Keeper but enjoy the idea of playing the bad guy and sending minions to do your bidding then i still suggest Overlord. And remember the only good halfling is one running around after being set on fire.

  22. 22.

    ellaesther

    January 6, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    John, I am happy that you are so happy! And if all it took was windshield wipers, I do wonder what an actual new car would do for you, but I will leave that to my imagination for now.

  23. 23.

    Quaker in a Basement

    January 6, 2010 at 4:32 pm

    When I lived in Florida a new set of wiper blades lasted for years. In Colorado? It’s different.

  24. 24.

    jeffreyw

    January 6, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    Grrr. Don’t want to think about windshield wipers. Brings back too many bad memories.

  25. 25.

    El Tiburon

    January 6, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    You should get a brand-new windshield.

    that is tha BOMB

  26. 26.

    freelancer

    January 6, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    http://www.wowt.com/weather

    low of -20 on Friday. Walked to work today because of another 6″ dusting. Glad I sprang for some ski goggles.

  27. 27.

    RSR

    January 6, 2010 at 4:35 pm

    The Rain-X washer fluid is great. The water tension/beading phenomenon it creates really increases visability. And you don’t have to run your wipers like a weed wacker to see!

  28. 28.

    ellaesther

    January 6, 2010 at 4:36 pm

    @Martin: Ha! (she said, and then sobbed into her hankie, for Martin spoke the truth).

  29. 29.

    General Winfield Stuck

    January 6, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    No No shit from moi. My windshield wipers came apart about 5 years ago. At least the thin rubber part that makes them work right. Living in the desert SW has it’s perks. In the unlikely event it does rain, the stubby rubber base will work just well enough I don’t, and haven’t crashed.

    In being frugal, or some might cheap and stoopid, I am all about conservatism.

    In a few years when the desert becomes the jungle again, I might put out for some new wipers. But till then

  30. 30.

    namekarB

    January 6, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    I don’t usually flame anyone but . . . . an A-list political blogger writes a post about windshield wipers? Really?

    So, perhaps you should purchase a top end tire pressure gauge to keep in your car and let us know how it works out.

  31. 31.

    steve

    January 6, 2010 at 4:38 pm

    Here in Illinois, it is 16 degrees, and if you try to use your windshield wipers to clear the snow off your windshield, it leaves a thin film of water which promptly freezes and renders the glass opaque. Maybe I need those more expensive top-shelf wiper blades too …

  32. 32.

    General Winfield Stuck

    January 6, 2010 at 4:39 pm

    @namekarB:

    Do you own a neti pot? or Furminater? Stick around, this could be your lucky day. We are all about all purpose blogging here.

  33. 33.

    GReynoldsCT00

    January 6, 2010 at 4:42 pm

    @namekarB:

    you’re new here aren’t you?

  34. 34.

    jeffreyw

    January 6, 2010 at 4:42 pm

    This thread needs more puppies.

  35. 35.

    freelancer

    January 6, 2010 at 4:42 pm

    OT – My friend sometimes FW emails he gets from his wingnut co-workers. I enjoy destroying them. Today’s was a doozy:

    LET ME SEE IF I GOT THIS RIGHT.
    • IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
    • IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.
    • IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.
    • IF YOU CROSS THE SAUDI ARABIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE JAILED.
    • IF YOU CROSS THE CHINESE BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU MAY NEVER BE HEARD FROM
    • AGAIN.
    • IF YOU CROSS THE VENEZUELAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE BRANDED A SPY AND
    • YOUR FATE WILL BE SEALED.
    • IF YOU CROSS THE CUBAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE THROWN INTO POLITICAL
    • PRISON TO ROT.
    • IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET
    1 – A JOB,
    2 – A DRIVERS LICENSE,
    3 – SOCIAL SECURITY CARD,
    4 – WELFARE,
    5 – FOOD STAMPS,
    6 – CREDIT CARDS,
    7 – SUBSIDIZED RENT OR A LOAN TO BUY A HOUSE,
    8 – FREE EDUCATION,
    9 – FREE HEALTH CARE,
    10 – A LOBBYIST IN WASHINGTON
    11 – BILLIONS OF DOLLARS WORTH OF PUBLIC DOCUMENTS PRINTED IN YOUR LANGUAGE
    12 – THE RIGHT TO CARRY YOUR COUNTRY’S FLAG WHILE YOU PROTEST THAT YOU DON’T GET ENOUGH RESPECT
    …
    I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE I HAD A FIRM GRASP ON THE SITUATION.

    My reasoned and tempered response:

    OMFG. THAT’S BECAUSE WE’RE THE FUCKING GOOD GUYS! WHAT IS IT ABOUT YOU RIGHT WING XENOPHOBES THAT MAKES IT SO YOU COME DOWN AS ENVIOUS OF OUR ENEMIES’ OPPRESSION? WHY DO YOU HATE FREEDOM?! ‘Cause that’s what this email is, hating freedom, and feeling jealous of fascists, theocrats, and brutal tyrants. Square that circle.
    …
    Also, if they get pushed to the front of every line, and don’t pay squat for their health care or education, that sounds pretty posh. I bet you could benefit from a deal like that.
    Trade places with an illegal, tomorrow. Put your money where your mouth is, Otherwise, STFU.
    …
    and then the retarded reaction of the fainting couch, “like, jeez louize, calm down, it’s just a joke!”
    but it’s not, (cause if it is, their sense of humor sucks and they might as well doing Mickey Rooney’s Jap in Breakfast at Tiffany’s.)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__-unOqTPYk
    http://gendergoggles.com/2008/10/26/breakfast-at-tiffanys-mr-yunioshi-and-good-old-fashioned-racism/
    …
    but the second these emails are opened, their pixels jump off the screen and into the head, and starts massaging the R-complex brain stem of the person, and they do a fist pump, they think
    “heck yeah, this is absolutely right. This is the way it oughtta be. I gotta forward this to Gretchen,” without a moment’s hesitance or ounce of self-reflection or higher cortex analysis. It’s Bush era bumper sticker thinking with your gut, not taking into account that your gut has shit for brains.

  36. 36.

    John Cole

    January 6, 2010 at 4:43 pm

    @namekarB: You really need to search the website for “Hola Fruta.”

  37. 37.

    Morbo

    January 6, 2010 at 4:44 pm

    Eh, yeah it helps to change them. It seems like their usefulness diminishes pretty quickly and you could change them every month if you really cared to. Personally I’ll look through a streak or two given the choice.

  38. 38.

    Roger Moore

    January 6, 2010 at 4:47 pm

    @frankdawg81:

    He stopped, got the wiper blades out of the glove box & put them on the car. I guess they were crude rubber & exposure to the sun caused them to break down or something

    There might also have been a problem with theft, which I imagine that they would be particularly sensitive to. There could be other strange explanations, too. I visited one place in Utah where they recommended that you protect your windshield wipers because the local ravens had started to steal them. I guess they’re good for weaving into nests.

  39. 39.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    January 6, 2010 at 4:49 pm

    I just bought some new windshield wipers….and it is like driving a new car.

    Is it possible that you actually bought an entire car instead? You know, bought the wipers, but they were attached to a new car? Just a really good salesman maybe?

    Windshield wipers that work are good. They’re not generally that good however.

  40. 40.

    Colette

    January 6, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    No “no shit” from me, either – I reserve that for my husband. He was amazed – amazed, I tells ya – at what a difference it made when I put new wiper blades on his old car. I don’t think he’d ever done it. Of course, he hasn’t bothered to change the blades on any of our subsequent cars either, so all his learning doesn’t stick.

    I have actually been secretly happy a couple of times when he cracked the windshield (not with his head, alas) so we could have the ineffable joy that is a new windshield.

  41. 41.

    Butch

    January 6, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    I actually got a pair of winter wipers for Christmas. Us romantic fools, I know, but they really made a difference.

  42. 42.

    Sentient Puddle

    January 6, 2010 at 4:53 pm

    Well, as long as this is a thread about windshield wipers, and it’s tagged General Stupidity, a story.

    One winter night during college, my roommates and I decided to go out to Denny’s. It had been snowing that day or something, and while the roads were clear enough to more or less drive, there was a nice bit of snow and ice stuck to the windshield. None of us had a scraper handy, and our driver wasn’t in the mood to sit around waiting for enough heat to dislodge the ice enough for the wipers to push them aside, so he just rolled down his window, stuck his head out, and started driving. The roommate in the passenger seat did the same, thinking that an extra set of eyes would probably be a good idea.

    A few minutes into the drive, the passenger said that the ice looked less stuck, and suggested giving the wipers a try. Our driver did, and indeed, the ice was wiped away. That said, it didn’t occur to our driver that the wiper blades would push anything on the windshield off to the left, and so with the car in motion, he got a nice faceful of ice.

    To his credit, at least he didn’t crash us.

  43. 43.

    cleek

    January 6, 2010 at 4:53 pm

    it is a wonderful feeling.

    but true happiness is finding wipers that will keep that new-wiper action for more than a couple of months.

    i’ve bought every wiper blade out there (including some very pricey ones that claimed to be the last blades i’ll ever need), and they all die after a few months. and yet the OEM wipers that come on new cars seem to last for years. it’s depressing when they finally go, because i know i’m about to get back into buying wipers every season.

  44. 44.

    Giant Douche or Turd Sandwich

    January 6, 2010 at 4:54 pm

    Personally, I wait until my wipers are essentially rotting like an over used rubber cock-ring that’s been left to dry in the desert. Once the metal starts scraping the windshield I finally break down and replace the damn things.

    I don’t like to spend money on vehicles, but sometimes it has to happen.

  45. 45.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    January 6, 2010 at 4:55 pm

    @frankdawg81: More likely that was a way to keep them from getting stolen.

  46. 46.

    Remember November

    January 6, 2010 at 4:55 pm

    No shit, Cole

  47. 47.

    soonergrunt

    January 6, 2010 at 4:56 pm

    @Roger Moore: Theft it would be. He also probably kept the battery in the trunk or in his appartment when he wasn’t using the car. Things like that were always in shortage in the old Soviet Union, and in fact were still a shortage when I was stationed in Europe in the early 90’s. I remember going to Poland and the Chezch Republic on leave and being reminded to remove my windshield wipers and battery at night if I wanted them again in the morning.

  48. 48.

    gnomedad

    January 6, 2010 at 4:56 pm

    @RSR:
    What RSR said.

  49. 49.

    Roger Moore

    January 6, 2010 at 4:56 pm

    @cleek:

    and yet the OEM wipers that come on new cars seem to last for years.

    Maybe you should think about buying replacement blades from the car dealer instead of going to the auto parts store. If they’re that much better, they’d be worth paying dealership prices.

  50. 50.

    John O

    January 6, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    No trashing from me. New blades (and new tires) make a surprising difference, so much so that I’ve become sort anal about keeping the wiper blades fresh. I would guess I change them WAY more often than the norm…at least once a year?

  51. 51.

    elmo

    January 6, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    @MattR: Dog owner? You should try being a dog rescuer to really understand what it does to vehicles.

    We bought a 2000 Toyota Sienna minivan to replace my old 1993 Chevy 3/4 ton pickup, and immediately fell in love with it as a dog transport vehicle. So easy to get in and out of! But the middle row of captain’s chairs was in the way.

    So we took them out and tossed ’em. What the heck, we don’t need ’em, we need the lovely space for all the dogs. But if I ever entertained the notion of actually selling a vehicle, instead of wringing every last drop of use out of it and then parting it out, I would never have done such a thing.

  52. 52.

    cleek

    January 6, 2010 at 5:01 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    Maybe you should think about buying replacement blades from the car dealer instead of going to the auto parts store.

    i’ve thought about it. but the dealer is a 35 minute drive from my house. it hurts my soul to think of spending that much time driving for a pair of wiper blades.

  53. 53.

    adolphus

    January 6, 2010 at 5:02 pm

    Windshield wipers are up there with new glasses, new running shoes, new AC, new brakes, and other things that go bad so slowly you barely notice them until you replace them at which point you realize just how bad you let things get and just how well these things are supposed to work.

    This to me is the REAL meaning of the slowly boiling frog fable. Not that you would let yourself get boiled to death, but you forget how cool and refreshing water can be until you jump out.

  54. 54.

    freelancer

    January 6, 2010 at 5:03 pm

    OT – a friend forwards me his co-workers’ wingnut emails. I get to destroy them. Today’s was a doozy:

    LET ME SEE IF I GOT THIS RIGHT.
    IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
    IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.
    IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.
    IF YOU CROSS THE SAUDI ARABIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE JAILED.
    IF YOU CROSS THE CHINESE BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU MAY NEVER BE HEARD FROM AGAIN.
    IF YOU CROSS THE VENEZUELAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE BRANDED A SPY AND YOUR FATE WILL BE SEALED.
    IF YOU CROSS THE CUBAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE THROWN INTO POLITICAL PRISON TO ROT.
    IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET
    1 – A JOB,
    2 – A DRIVERS LICENSE,
    3 – SOCIAL SECURITY CARD,
    4 – WELFARE,
    5 – FOOD STAMPS,
    6 – CREDIT CARDS,
    7 – SUBSIDIZED RENT OR A LOAN TO BUY A HOUSE,
    8 – FREE EDUCATION,
    9 – FREE HEALTH CARE,
    10 – A LOBBYIST IN WASHINGTON
    11 – BILLIONS OF DOLLARS WORTH OF PUBLIC DOCUMENTS PRINTED IN YOUR LANGUAGE
    12 – THE RIGHT TO CARRY YOUR COUNTRY’S FLAG WHILE YOU PROTEST THAT YOU DON’T GET ENOUGH RESPECT

    My reasoned and scholastic response:

    OMFG. THAT’S BECAUSE WE’RE THE FUCKING GOOD GUYS! WHAT IS IT ABOUT YOU RIGHT WING XENOPHOBES THAT MAKES IT SO YOU COME DOWN AS ENVIOUS OF OUR ENEMIES’ OPPRESSION? WHY DO YOU HATE FREEDOM?! ‘Cause that’s what this email is, hating freedom, and feeling jealous of fascists, theocrats, and brutal tyrants. Square that circle.
    …
    Also, if they get pushed to the front of every line, and don’t pay squat for their health care or education, that sounds pretty posh. I bet you could benefit from a deal like that.
    Trade places with an illegal, tomorrow. Put your money where your mouth is, Otherwise, STFU
    …
    and then there’s the inevitable whinging reaction,
    “like, jeez louize, calm down, it’s just a joke!” but it’s not, (cause if it is, their sense of humor sucks and they might as well doing Mickey Rooney’s Jap in Breakfast at Tiffany’s.)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__-unOqTPYk
    …
    http://gendergoggles.com/2008/10/26/breakfast-at-tiffanys-mr-yunioshi-and-good-old-fashioned-racism/
    …
    but the second these emails are opened, their pixels jump off the screen and into the head, and start massaging the R-complex brain stem of the person, and they pump their fists, thinking
    “heck yeah, this is absolutely right. This is the way it oughtta be. I gotta forward this to Gretchen,” without a moment’s hesitance or ounce of self-reflection or higher cortex analysis.
    It’s Bush era bumper sticker thinking with your gut, not taking into account that your gut has shit for brains.

  55. 55.

    licensed to kill time

    January 6, 2010 at 5:04 pm

    Ha! This is a great site. Dickwhisperers, Bombin’ Slovaks, windshield wipers, puppies, food pron and skullfucking kittens – you just gotta love BJ.

    My wipers have been dryrotted for years now – not much rain where I live. I’ve only had to use the arm out the window method a couple times and I survived to tell the tale.

  56. 56.

    General Winfield Stuck

    January 6, 2010 at 5:05 pm

    @jeffreyw:

    Somebody stop me. Can’t help myself.

    Charlie action

    Charlie smiles

  57. 57.

    Demo Woman

    January 6, 2010 at 5:09 pm

    @Comrade Mary: This morning John said that he felt like ten dollars. IMO, he sounds as though he feels like twice that amount after the purchase of new wipers.
    OT.. The forecast calls for an inch of snow to fall in Atlanta starting tomorrow afternoon. Schools are already announcing early closing for tomorrow.

  58. 58.

    Roger Moore

    January 6, 2010 at 5:09 pm

    @cleek:

    i’ve thought about it. but the dealer is a 35 minute drive from my house.

    I understand. I’m just spoiled by living in the big city, where there are dealerships all over the place. I wonder if you can order OEM parts over the net…

  59. 59.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    January 6, 2010 at 5:11 pm

    @freelancer: You know, it’s true, it’s not until you get a brand new:

    1 – JOB,
    2 – DRIVERS LICENSE,
    3 – SOCIAL SECURITY CARD,
    6 – CREDIT CARDS,

    that you realize how worn out the old ones were. What a feeling that is.

  60. 60.

    Elie

    January 6, 2010 at 5:14 pm

    @Violet:

    Winshield wipers get messed up from the car wash where the wax builds up on them, making your windshield smeary..

    Dunno if you all have ever heard of it, but there is a waterproofing treatment that I had put on my windshield last I went to JiffyLube and it is amazing! The water just rolls off making it much easier for my wipers and in fact, I dont even need wipers for many rain events.

    PS – We really KNOW about rain up here in the Northwest.

  61. 61.

    PhoenixRising

    January 6, 2010 at 5:15 pm

    That’s nothin’, man. I dropped 5 hundred bucks on new shocks this morning.

    Oddly, the truck rides and handles a lot different now that all 4 tires can touch the dirt as it corners. Astonishing.

    I will now haul ranching-related items without getting carsick behind the wheel, and may be able to exceed 54 mph.

  62. 62.

    lutton

    January 6, 2010 at 5:15 pm

    Mickey Rooney’s Jap in Breakfast at Tiffany’s

    haha; my wife & I watched that movie for the first time ever just last year, and we were simply stunned at that character.

  63. 63.

    cleek

    January 6, 2010 at 5:17 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    I’m just spoiled by living in the big city, where there are dealerships all over the place.

    for some stupid reason, all the Toyota dealers in the Raleigh area are up on the north side of the city. all of us on the south side can suck it, i guess. that’s why my next car won’t be a Toyota (fine car than mine has been).

    I wonder if you can order OEM parts over the net…

    i haven’t been able to find a site that has the originals. every car part shop on the net shows up in a search for them, though.

  64. 64.

    Maude

    January 6, 2010 at 5:17 pm

    I went to a small zoo once. There was a sign outside of the gate telling people not to park in thus and so area.
    A guy parked his new vinyl roofed car there because it was closer to the gate.
    When we came out, a dozen monkeys were having the time of their lives peeling the vinyl and the blades off of the windshield wipers.

  65. 65.

    Martin

    January 6, 2010 at 5:17 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    Sure you can. I use H & A for my Honda. Rear wiper insert is $3.66. I get them there since there is no aftermarket blade for the rear wiper on my car.

    There are sites for other mfgrs.

  66. 66.

    jeffreyw

    January 6, 2010 at 5:18 pm

    @General Winfield Stuck: Don’t stop! We loves us some Charlie!

  67. 67.

    Jane

    January 6, 2010 at 5:19 pm

    This is like the steel-cut oats thread.

  68. 68.

    Martin

    January 6, 2010 at 5:20 pm

    H&A says they’ll be selling Toyota factory parts soon. Don’t know if wipers will get in there, but for the Honda you can buy damn near anything from them.

  69. 69.

    KDP

    January 6, 2010 at 5:20 pm

    @Sentient Puddle: Working windshield wipers are wondrous, particularly in winter snowstorms. I see your story and add my own.

    Many years ago, I worked for DECUS (Digital Equipment Users Group) in Marlboro MA and lived in Medford. The 20+ mile commute wasn’t too bad until the evening a major snowstorm blew in. As I pulled out of the DEC parking lot in the blinding snow, the windshield wiper motor on my old rust bucket of a VW bug gave out on me. No heat, no wipers, no cell phones, no all night service stations (the one I stopped at was closing as I arrived), no strip malls or hotel chains in the area yet (circa 1982), and the facility I worked in was locked up tight.

    I drove home, in the dark, on winding two lane country roads with the driver’s window open and one hand reaching around to clear a triangular patch of windshield just large enough that I could stay on the road. Made it to a friend’s house about 5 miles from home. I knocked on the door and was taken in to be warmed, fed, and rested before finishing the drive home. Happily, Intel hired me as a sys admin that April and moved me to California that May.

    Yes, working windshield wipers are a wondrous thing!

    @General Winfield

    Ahhhh, love the Charlie action shot!

  70. 70.

    Roger Moore

    January 6, 2010 at 5:20 pm

    @Martin:
    Cool. Looks like they sell Toyota parts, too, which should make Cleek happy.

  71. 71.

    Quicksand

    January 6, 2010 at 5:21 pm

    I prefer D’Anjou.

  72. 72.

    KDP

    January 6, 2010 at 5:22 pm

    @General Winfield Stuck: Aaah, love the Charlie action shot.

  73. 73.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    January 6, 2010 at 5:22 pm

    Okay but did John get this excited about new windshield wipers?

    I’d say that’s the gold standard for new windshield wiper excitement, there.

  74. 74.

    Eric S.

    January 6, 2010 at 5:28 pm

    I’ve been telling myself for a couple of years to buy new wipers but never got around to it. Since I generally drive no more than 4000 mi / year it was never high on my priority list. Over the holidays I took a road trip from Chicago to visit a college friend in S.C. Of course this is when the wipers decided to go so bad as to not actually touch the windshield. I was getting so mush salt spray from the road I could barely see my way to Indy. First auto parts store sign I saw I stopped and bought a pair.

  75. 75.

    Elie

    January 6, 2010 at 5:29 pm

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    Charlie Action is my fave…

    What a happy dog you got there, General…

  76. 76.

    General Winfield Stuck

    January 6, 2010 at 5:31 pm

    @Maude:

    When we came out, a dozen monkeys were having the time of their lives peeling the vinyl and the blades off of the windshield wipers.

    Tea Bag Party?

  77. 77.

    Tsulagi

    January 6, 2010 at 5:32 pm

    Someone’s easily wowed. New windshield wipers like driving a new car? Oookay.

    Another cheap item you can get big dividends from by spending a few extra bucks is sparkplugs. Put a set of Bosch Platinum4 (four electrode) in my car 3+ years ago and can still feel they’re firing great. Never have to gap the plug.

  78. 78.

    mcc

    January 6, 2010 at 5:32 pm

    This smells open thread-y so I’m just gonna say: State of the Union likely to be postponed so it can take place after HCR final passage.

  79. 79.

    ilsita

    January 6, 2010 at 5:33 pm

    You’ll be in for a real treat when you get around to changing the oil.

  80. 80.

    Elie

    January 6, 2010 at 5:33 pm

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    LOL!!!

  81. 81.

    ellaesther

    January 6, 2010 at 5:33 pm

    OMG! OMG! OMG!

    I’m “a reader” on The Daily Dish!

    I want the record to show that I have always said on this site that “I know many here have an argument with Andrew Sullivan, but I…” — now, of course, no matter what, ellaesther is Team Andrew!!

    Way more exciting than I almost care to admit.

    (Oh, right: The subject is the use of the word “colonization” to describe Israeli settlements. You can read my further squeeing at my own place!)

  82. 82.

    freelancer

    January 6, 2010 at 5:35 pm

    @mcc:

    What next? The SuperBowl?!

    oh…wait.

    @ellaesther:

    It’s nice when you make the front page, innit? I had the same feeling.

  83. 83.

    Martin

    January 6, 2010 at 5:36 pm

    @ellaesther:

    You’ll be jealous to hear that I’ve gotten on Sully twice *and* on Fallows twice. And yes, it’s a little sad at how exciting it can be (especially Fallows). Sully not so much because I was calling him a dick both times.

  84. 84.

    Face

    January 6, 2010 at 5:37 pm

    Once, I bawt 4 tires for my car, and you wouldnt believe how much better traction I got than when just driving on naked rims.

    Somebody show JC how to open the glovebox, although he needs to know that there’s unlikely to be any gloves inside.

  85. 85.

    Punchy

    January 6, 2010 at 5:39 pm

    Is this a part of the Cash for (Crushed) Cicadas program?

  86. 86.

    General Winfield Stuck

    January 6, 2010 at 5:43 pm

    @Elie:

    thanks, he is a sweetheart!!

  87. 87.

    Seanly

    January 6, 2010 at 5:44 pm

    @MattR:

    Oh yeah. My chow-sheppard mix and her son (chow-sheppard-golden?) both shed their top coat like it’s going out of style. Then I put them in my SUV and they go really nuts with the shedding. In warmer weather, I roll down the windows and their fur flies around – even when they haven’t been in the truck in a month.

    And yes, I am aware that having an SUV reduces my soc-ialist liberal cred. It’s an 8-yr old Saturn if that makes it any better…

    Funny thing about Saturn windshields (wife drives a 10-yr old sedan) – I don’t know if I bought stone wipers at one point or something, but the widnshields are severely scratched. Think of the random Brill-O pad scratches on a popular Netflix DVD but all over and trying to look through that to drive.

  88. 88.

    Svensker

    January 6, 2010 at 5:46 pm

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    Awwwwww. He is so cuuuuuuuuute.

  89. 89.

    KDP

    January 6, 2010 at 5:47 pm

    @ellaesther: Congrats, and nicely said. Your very own post, too.

  90. 90.

    AkaDad

    January 6, 2010 at 5:49 pm

    It’s a good thing I didn’t install those awesome windshield wipers. I wouldn’t have been eligible for the cash for clunkers program.

  91. 91.

    tavella

    January 6, 2010 at 5:49 pm

    The strange thing I have discovered, having just replaced them myself, is that you can no longer just get blade replacements to slide in; the auto parts stores only sell whole blade assemblages. I finally had to go online to get such, and only found one store on the whole damn internet that sold both sizes of the width that fits my car. Which suggests to me that they are no longer manufactured at all.

  92. 92.

    RedKitten

    January 6, 2010 at 5:53 pm

    @Jane:

    This is like the steel-cut oats thread.

    There was a thread about steel-cut oats? Where the hell was I? Those are AWESOME.

    I don’t know if you folks have them, but up here, at Canadian Tire, we have this nifty windshield wiper called the “Reflex”, which is curved and springy, so the tension from the wiper arm flattens it onto your windshield, resulting in no gaps whatsoever. They’re the shizznit.

    Not a fan of the Rain-X. It’s fine if it’s raining hard, but if you’re getting a drizzle, mist, snow, or salt-laden wet road splatter from the truck in front of you, it just makes things worse. I stick with the plain old blue stuff.

  93. 93.

    Maude

    January 6, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    @General Winfield Stuck: Shame on you, Teabaggers aren’t that smart or capable. Thought you knew that.

  94. 94.

    mak

    January 6, 2010 at 5:57 pm

    WIPER BLADE STORY NO. 1: Took my car for inspection once, forgetting that the wiper on the passenger side was beyond unacceptable, with half the blade flapping behind the rest like a filleted tail. The garage noticed, of course, and charged my $20 or so for a replacement. Who needs a passenger side wiper, really? Still pisses me off.

    WIPER BLADE STORY NO. 2: Charged $70 for pair of wiper blades to replace noisy original equipment by dealer while German SUV in for warranty service. German SUV now history, but memory still pisses me off also, too.

  95. 95.

    abscam

    January 6, 2010 at 6:00 pm

    @Seanly: Mine, too. two year old windshield on an SL1, but it looks like someone took a brillo pad and practiced figure eights…

  96. 96.

    ellaesther

    January 6, 2010 at 6:02 pm

    @Martin: Well. /shuffles shyly/ I’ve actually been on twice!

    But the other time was just a few lines, about the Iranian protesters on Ashura, not an entire post dealing with my professional area of expertise, with him letting me tell him that he was wrong about one wee little word — for an entire post!

    Never been front-paged anywhere else but Jezebel, though…. Ahem, John Cole? (Or did I just kill my chances with Mr. Fancy Windshield Wipers…. Hmmm…).

  97. 97.

    freelancer

    January 6, 2010 at 6:08 pm

    @ellaesther:

    Cole is a very specific elitist.

  98. 98.

    eastriver

    January 6, 2010 at 6:13 pm

    Like Coles to new wipers.

  99. 99.

    MattR

    January 6, 2010 at 6:15 pm

    @elmo: Touche.

    @Seanly:

    In warmer weather, I roll down the windows and their fur flies around

    I see you use the same cleaning technique I do.

    @tavella: OK, so it is not just me. The last couple times I have had to buy replacements have been bad timing – in a rush and the store was busy so I took what I could find and silently stewed about paying extra.

  100. 100.

    Jager

    January 6, 2010 at 6:21 pm

    Some of you people need to have a serious conversation with yourself about doing regular maintenence on your vehicles. Jesus!

    Elmo, when you trade in that Sienna, filled with dog hair and all worn out, don’t expect to get a few bucks more because the center row seats look brand new! BTW, I’d be using the seats on my front porch if i were you!

  101. 101.

    General Winfield Stuck

    January 6, 2010 at 6:25 pm

    Some of you people need to have a serious conversation with yourself about doing regular maintenence on your vehicles. Jesus!

    Elitist!!

  102. 102.

    SiubhanDuinne

    January 6, 2010 at 6:26 pm

    @Maude: My aunt drove through one of those Safari Kingdom places once, and a troop of baboons jumped on her car and did the same thing. Ruined the vinyl fabric roof. It was an old car and already beginning to peel, so she didn’t care that much, but my uncle wasn’t happy when he saw the damage the next day.

  103. 103.

    ellaesther

    January 6, 2010 at 6:27 pm

    @eastriver: ahahahahaha!!

  104. 104.

    gopher2b

    January 6, 2010 at 6:28 pm

    This economy is so turning around.

  105. 105.

    SiubhanDuinne

    January 6, 2010 at 6:31 pm

    @freelancer:

    Your answer was far more eloquent than mine, but I got pretty much the same email from a wingnut relative a few months ago, and my response was along the lines of “Just look at the countries you are naming — North Korea, Saudi Arabia, Iran, etc. — why in the world would you want the U.S. to be like them?”

    I admire your reply, and the next time I get one of these (before hitting the delete button) I will probably use your words.

  106. 106.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    January 6, 2010 at 6:32 pm

    John, we all voted for the guy who advocated monitoring tire pressure and wearing a sweater when it’s cold. Little things, indeed.

  107. 107.

    General Winfield Stuck

    January 6, 2010 at 6:33 pm

    @gopher2b:

    This economy is so turning around.

    So very deep./

  108. 108.

    Rick Taylor

    January 6, 2010 at 6:37 pm

    @Zifnab

    I’m replacing my windshield wipers with shoe laces and driving in out in the rain, cause I know it’ll piss off the liberals.

  109. 109.

    SiubhanDuinne

    January 6, 2010 at 6:38 pm

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    Some of you people need to have a serious conversation with yourself about doing regular maintenence on your vehicles. Jesus!

    Elitist!!

    LOL, General! I’m taking my car in Saturday for its regular maintenance. It’s a 1999 Saturn, I’ve put 170,000 miles on it, and although it shows its age a little bit (as, indeed, which of us does not?) it has been a fine and loyal vehicle which I hope will serve me for a few more years. Elitist, ha! I like that! {sniffs and stalks away}

  110. 110.

    SiubhanDuinne

    January 6, 2010 at 6:43 pm

    @RedKitten:

    RedKitten, do you have the engine block warmer where you are in NS? I love visiting my Canadian relatives in the winter time. You can drive around any parking lot and see all these cars with their little electrical cord tongues hanging out. It always amuses me.

    Even though I grew up in bitterly cold Chicago area, and lived for nine years in just-as-bitterly-cold-if-not-worse Michigan, I don’t think I’ve ever seen the engine block warmers anywhere except Canada. Possibly I just wasn’t paying attention . . . .

  111. 111.

    Jager

    January 6, 2010 at 6:50 pm

    I had Mrs J’s ten year old Benz in for some “elitist” service. The service writer, after looking at the car’s records, complimented me on how well we’ve taken care of it. He said these are really well made and well engineered cars but they have to be taken care of. He proceeded to tell me about a guy who bought a new S 550 (about 85k) and then drove it for 28,000 miles without getting it serviced…when the oil turned back into tar and the filters finally clogged the engine shit the bed. The car was towed in and the guy was incensed, screaming his head off about what a piece of shit the S Class was. I asked the writer what happened, he told me the service manager took the guy aside and told him in no uncertain terms the cars failure was his fault, he hadn’t maintained the car and he had no one blame except himself. The guy said he was going to sue and the service manager said, go ahead, but I have to warn you the German’s take maintenence seriously and they have an entire floor of attorneys who take it seriously, too! The guy paid 12,900 for repairs!

  112. 112.

    MattR

    January 6, 2010 at 6:51 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: I never appreciated or understood the need for heated seats until I visited Winnipeg when it was -40 or so. In fact schools were closed because it was too cold for the buses to run (the diesel fuel was freezing).

  113. 113.

    Jane

    January 6, 2010 at 6:56 pm

    RedKitten:

    I believe there were close to 200 comments on the steel-cut oats post, very similar in content to the windshield wiper comments.

    I’m in western NB, BTW. Upper St John River valley.

  114. 114.

    MattR

    January 6, 2010 at 6:59 pm

    @Jane: Random question for you or RedKitten – did they ever upgrade the Moncton airport? My only exposure to NB was the week or so I worked in Moncton a few years back. At that time there was an effort to expand and modernize the airport. Kinda curious if that ever panned out.

  115. 115.

    Martin

    January 6, 2010 at 7:08 pm

    For dog owners, you really need to consider a Honda Element. No carpet. You can get it fur-free in about 5 minutes with a vacuum.

  116. 116.

    Martin

    January 6, 2010 at 7:10 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    I’ve seen them in Minnesota.

  117. 117.

    ellaesther

    January 6, 2010 at 7:22 pm

    @Jane: Don’t forget the “which apples are good apples?” post.

  118. 118.

    Ruckus

    January 6, 2010 at 7:30 pm

    @gopher2b:
    I mis read at first – This economy is so running aground.
    Yours is better

  119. 119.

    daryljfontaine

    January 6, 2010 at 7:33 pm

    @jeffreyw:
    @General Winfield Stuck:

    Ur puppehs have made me smile.

    I have a 12-year-old car and (finally) a mechanic I trust, who I was referred to by a guy who helped me out when my car was overheating last spring. From other folks’ experience, I know that having a thorough and honest mechanic is worth its weight in gold, especially if you do a lot of driving.

    As far as windshield wipers, I usually let them go for quite a while without replacement (especially at franchise oil-change usurious replacement rates), but I think I will take the group advice and invest in some good ones before I do all my driving trips this spring — I expect a fair amount of rain. Tires too; they’ve been put through enough.

    D

  120. 120.

    Neutron Flux

    January 6, 2010 at 7:34 pm

    @namekarB: An A lsit political blogger? I am not buying what you are selling.

  121. 121.

    RedKitten

    January 6, 2010 at 7:43 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    @RedKitten:
    RedKitten, do you have the engine block warmer where you are in NS? I love visiting my Canadian relatives in the winter time. You can drive around any parking lot and see all these cars with their little electrical cord tongues hanging out. It always amuses me.
    Even though I grew up in bitterly cold Chicago area, and lived for nine years in just-as-bitterly-cold-if-not-worse Michigan, I don’t think I’ve ever seen the engine block warmers anywhere except Canada. Possibly I just wasn’t paying attention . . . .

    Yeah, I think they just come standard on cars sold here. The outlet is hidden quite well, though, so you really wouldn’t notice it unless one is actually plugged in. And there aren’t too many nights I’ve had to plug it in — just during a bad cold snap, usually.

  122. 122.

    RedKitten

    January 6, 2010 at 7:50 pm

    @MattR:

    @Jane: Random question for you or RedKitten – did they ever upgrade the Moncton airport? My only exposure to NB was the week or so I worked in Moncton a few years back. At that time there was an effort to expand and modernize the airport. Kinda curious if that ever panned out.

    Well, they constructed and opened a new terminal building in 2002. From what I saw on the news, it looks pretty spiffy. I actually haven’t been near that airport since 1992, when I was taking my pilot’s license at the Moncton Flight Club.

    And Jane, I’m originally from Bathurst…or as you’ve probably heard it called, “Baddurst” (French accent added, and emphasis on second syllable.)

  123. 123.

    E-Schwill

    January 6, 2010 at 7:59 pm

    Seriously John, I just did the same thing. One of my old wipers broke off in a storm and I picked up a set of “Rain-X” wipers for about $20. I didn’t even know how good my visibility could be. It’s like driving a new car when I use them.

  124. 124.

    elmo

    January 6, 2010 at 8:06 pm

    @Jager: No, no, we threw them OUT. They’re GONE. I put them in the dump myself.

  125. 125.

    MattR

    January 6, 2010 at 8:10 pm

    @RedKitten: Hmmm. I am pretty sure I was there after 2002. I remember the airport being small, but clean. Maybe they were just complaiing about a lack of customs at the airport (or the hours that customs officers were there). Oh well, it was a while ago and obviously it didn’t stick too strongly in my memory.

  126. 126.

    Anne Laurie

    January 6, 2010 at 8:32 pm

    @Roger Moore:

    I visited one place in Utah where they recommended that you protect your windshield wipers because the local ravens had started to steal them. I guess they’re good for weaving into nests.

    Given the tool-modifying crows linked on the early-morning octupus thread… how long before them ravens start hotwiring the cars and stealing them?

  127. 127.

    CalD

    January 6, 2010 at 8:44 pm

    Bosch makes a good product. I’ve really found the difference between ANCO blades and anything more expensive (I will never again buy anything cheaper) to be pretty negligible though. The main thing is they need to be replaced every six months, regardless of who makes them.

  128. 128.

    Cathyish

    January 6, 2010 at 8:57 pm

    @namekarB: Who is this “A-list blogger” of which you speak??

  129. 129.

    Ralph Dosser

    January 6, 2010 at 8:59 pm

    I moved to Denver from Atlanta 9 years ago, and until last year I resisted getting snow tires. $400 tires that you only use 4 months a year? Owning two sets of tires per car? GTF outtahere!

    After nearly getting into dozens of accidents and realizing I lived in fear half of the year, I broke down and bought ’em. Now I watch with disdain as other drivers – in all-wheel Subarus and trucks – slip and slide while my Accord rides like it’s on rails.

    No shit, Dosser.

  130. 130.

    shortstop

    January 6, 2010 at 9:08 pm

    Not only am I not going to say, “No shit, Cole,” I’m going to drag the third baseman in here and make him read this.

  131. 131.

    reality-based

    January 7, 2010 at 12:24 am

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    You know, when I first left North Dakota, in 1982, I remember getting as far south as mid-Idaho before somebody asked me what that electric plug-in hanging out of the front of my car was for

    At that moment, I had the blissful realization that I WOULDN”T HAVE TO PLUG MY CAR IN ANYMORE!

    sigh – Ok, 25 years later, moved back to Nodak in 2008, first thing my mechanical genius of a brother-in-law did for me was install an oil-pan heater (new wrinkle, replaces the old head-bolt heaters) in my California Ford – and it’s 20 below here now, I’m plugging in the car every night –

    second thing he did was replace my windshield wiper blades – but that was a year and half ago, it’s long past time to do it again –

  132. 132.

    Chuck Butcher

    January 7, 2010 at 2:40 am

    UV and dirt kill your wipers. UV doesn’t care if you run them or not. They will die and not work well or at all. I use GM wipers on the SSR. They are very long and with OEM they do a really good job. I get about 11/2 years use depending. My old stuff gets ANCO, but circa 62, 74, 78 OEM isn’t real practical.

    Blogging from a motel room 350 mi from home.

  133. 133.

    brantl

    January 7, 2010 at 8:11 am

    I was going to say that you took all the fun out of this with the pre-emptive, JC, but no.

  134. 134.

    Ken J.

    January 7, 2010 at 10:52 am

    My dad trained me to replace the windshield wipers before the streaking gets very bad. Usually this boils down to:

    Replace in late fall, so there is a good set going into the winter.

    Replace in spring, after the winter road salt has worked its will on the old wipers.

    I spend about $20-25 on a pair of Rain-X brand wipers these days; I have traded down from the Bosch which were $30-35.

    Also, every 2-4 weeks, I rub the wipers down with a wet paper towel to remove some of the bugs and road grit. (that tends to get done less often in the winter, because I don’t want to freeze my hands.)

    My other secret: in Michigan, I have decided that the premium washer fluid — the stuff colored red or green, which says it won’t freeze down to -35 F — performs better for January and February. That upgrade only costs a couple of bucks a year. (The standard blue washer fluid claims nonfreezing down to -20 or -25F. 20 years ago, I experienced a few subzero mornings where the blue stuff would freeze on the windshield.)

  135. 135.

    Foinsap

    January 7, 2010 at 1:56 pm

    @Giant Douche or Turd Sandwich:

    I don’t like to spend money on vehicles

    Or on cock rings either, apparently.

    I see no net savings here. A cracked and checked cock ring’s gotta be like a rusty cheese grater on your boyfriend’s butt, and Preparation-H ain’t free.

    Not that there’s anything wrong with gay funnypumper butttsecks or anything.

    As for wipers good ones in rainy or wintry climes provide amazing results for the money. Much safer too. My OEM wipers lasted 8 years of midwest winters. Just had to replace them last month. Hope they last 2 seasons.

  136. 136.

    cleek

    January 7, 2010 at 2:17 pm

    @ellaesther:

    Don’t forget the “which apples are good apples?” post.

    sad i missed that one.

    btw, the answer is Macintosh.

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