Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

If you are in line to indict donald trump, stay in line.

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

This fight is for everything.

Just because you believe it, that doesn’t make it true.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

How can republicans represent us when they don’t trust women?

Since we are repeating ourselves, let me just say fuck that.

An unpunished coup is a training exercise.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Imperialist aggressors must be defeated, or the whole world loses.

At some point, the ability to learn is a factor of character, not IQ.

How any woman could possibly vote for this smug smarmy piece of misogynistic crap is beyond understanding.

When you’re in more danger from the IDF than from Russian shelling, that’s really bad.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

If you cannot answer whether trump lost the 2020 election, you are unfit for office.

Roe isn’t about choice, it’s about freedom.

New McCarthy, same old McCarthyism.

Republicans want to make it harder to vote and easier for them to cheat.

When do the post office & the dmv weigh in on the wuhan virus?

Everything is totally normal and fine!!!

When you’re a Republican, they let you do it.

I might just take the rest of the day off and do even more nothing than usual.

After dobbs, women are no longer free.

You are here: Home / “I Stand in Obama’s Way” (Like A Cow on the Tracks)

“I Stand in Obama’s Way” (Like A Cow on the Tracks)

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Underrated political humorist Mark “Tongue So Firmly in Cheek As to Protrude from the Vulgar Bodily Orifice” Ambinder reaches a level of deadpan genius that Steven Wright would envy:

John McCain has released the first two ads of his 2010 Senate reelection campaign, and he’s got some sharp words for President Obama, possibly the sharpest he’s offered yet.

“President Obama is leading an extreme, left wing crusade to bankrupt America. I stand in his way every day. If I get a bruise or two knocking some sense into heads in Washington, so be it…”

A narrator calls McCain “Arizona’s last line of defense” against Obama’s agenda and says McCain leads the charge against “ridiculously unaffordable ideas like government-run health care.”
…
McCain has been critical of Obama’s agenda, as conservatives Republicans are wont to be. But he hasn’t really sought out public forums to level those attacks since Obama entered the White House…

How many times has ‘President McCain’ appeared on what Calvin Trillin called the “Sabbath Day Gasbag” TV circuit since November 2008?

Reader Interactions

82Comments

  1. 1.

    Garrigus Carraig

    He’ll still be on even after he gets beat in the primaries. Which sucks, but Jesus knows what he’ll do if he’s not kept busy.

  6. 6.

    freelancer

    OT – Oh, fucking SNAP, Andrew!

    Just eviscerates Cheney, his record, his failure, his evil, and his incompetence. Ends with this:

    How this utter failure gets to pontificate on terror after his disastrous record is beyond me. But then, Mike Allen would have fewer pageviews, wouldn’t he?

  7. 7.

    NobodySpecial

    This is some goober named Chris Good. Looking at what he writes, I suspect he’s a drinking buddy of Dick “Man Eating Robot” Cheney.

  9. 9.

    Zandar

    But he hasn’t really sought out public forums to level those attacks since Obama entered the White House…

    Because the Meet The Press bookers seek out him, you see. If McCain will not come to the mountain, the mountain will come to McCain. Where it will carry him up to the top and allow him to echo down into the valleys about how he’s the only thing standing between you and the absolute tyranny of a party with 60 votes in the Senate and 59% of the House crafting legislation and trying to pass it.

  10. 10.

    Brachiator

    How many times has ‘President McCain’ appeared on what Calvin Trillin called the “Sabbath Day Gasbag” TV circuit since November 2008?

    The answer, my friend, is blowing pundit wind.

    The answer is blowing pundit wind.

  13. 13.

    Violet

    I bet the Secret Service doesn’t like that. The motorcade will just mow him down if he doesn’t get out of the way.

  14. 14.

    Pangloss

    If the left wing is actually on a crusade to bankrupt the country, isn’t using the word “extreme” kinda superfluous?

  15. 15.

    Tom Hilton

    It’s too bad that nice young Senator McCain is such a shrinking violet. He could really go places, if he would just put himself out there.

  16. 16.

    Ash Can

    I’m sure Ambinder Good will be fine after a bucket of ice water over the head and a few pots of strong black coffee. (Thanks, Crust)

  18. 18.

    beltane

    When old men like Gramps McCain are standing in my way on the road, I just pass them. Life is too short to drive ten miles an hour below the speed limit.

  20. 20.

    licensed to kill time

    __

    John McCain has released the first two ads of his 2010 Senate reelection campaign, and he’s got some sharp words for President Obama, possibly the sharpest he’s offered yet.

    John McGinsu?

  22. 22.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    A narrator calls McCain “Arizona’s last line of defense” against Obama’s agenda

    Yeah, because McCain can filibuster Obama’s proposals and–oh, yeah.

  23. 23.

    joe from Lowell

    Isn’t this a little bit like Gerry Cooney advertising his services to people who are afraid of getting beaten up by Larry Holmes?

  25. 25.

    SpotWeld

    Think how much money AZ could say by eliminating McCain’s position entirely and simplying sending a concrete highway barrier to Washington.

    They could even paint it red white & blue for patriotic displays and festive occasions

  26. 26.

    El Cid

    he hasn’t really sought out public forums to level those attacks since Obama entered the White House…

    Does McCain seek out the Sunday shows, or do they seek him out? My guess is it’s the latter.

  27. 27.

    PurpleGirl

    McCain doesn’t like government health care… maybe it’s time for him to make a pledge to give it up, pledge and make the signing of a private insurance contract public as he leaves behind the VA care he can get, and the Medicare he could get and anything else on the public dime. I’m really tired of that gasbag saying anything at all about health care… he’s been on the public dime since BEFORE he was born. (Yes. this issue and him really hits my buttons. I’ll rejoin the conversation when I return from a Crochet Guild meeting later this evening.)

  31. 31.

    Morbo

    How many times has ‘President McCain’ appeared on what Calvin Trillin called the “Sabbath Day Gasbag” TV circuit since November 2008?

    I suggest an unscientific google results study of Eschaton bobblehead listings. I know if you count Lieberman, Graham, and McCain, one or more of the three of them was on 9 out of 20 randomly collected Sundays from the past two years (or was it 24/50? some number that was one fewer than %50 of the total, I forget).

  32. 32.

    Jay in Oregon

    @MikeJ:

    It’s a guilty pleasure.

    Michael Emerson as Ben Linus is a joy to watch. How sad is it that I’m actively rooting for the bad guy??

  33. 33.

    freelancer

    @NobodySpecial:

    This post is so meta, that I can’t tell if the piece being commented on is high-grade subtlety primo snark, or if it is a fluff job with no hint of self-awareness. That takes talent if it’s the former.

    @Jay in Oregon:

    Ben Linus isn’t a cut-and-dried bad guy, that’s what makes him so awesome and conflicting to root for. And it’s not a guilty pleasure for me, not anymore than BSG was.

  34. 34.

    Jim

    @Malron:

    @Maude: Third generation welfare queen he is.

    To be fair, the McCain men have been marrying far more money than they ever earned in their government positions for three generations.

    McCain has been critical of Obama’s agenda, as conservatives Republicans are wont to be. But he hasn’t really sought out public forums to level those attacks since Obama entered the White House…

    I guess I’m not the only one who’s given up on Sunday shows. But I still know who their favorite guests are. It’s not even part of my job.

  35. 35.

    MikeJ

    If Lost is more important to you than the state of the union you should lose your right to vote. That goes double for the Charlie Brown xmas special.

  36. 36.

    CalD

    I love the “cow on the tracks” quote. I’ve taken to privately referring to Michael Steele as the Cow, ever since he dropped that little gem — or sometimes the Cow that Roared (when he gets testy).

    (Other times I think of Steele as the hood ornament that thinks it’s driving the car…)

  37. 37.

    jibeaux

    Ooh, I miss Lost. And Michael Emerson as Ben Linus, has there ever in the history of mankind been a creepier-looking dude? Yeeesh. Of course, that makes him perfect.

  38. 38.

    CalD

    Anyway, I think it’s an interesting approach for Republicans to try and define themselves by the things they haven’t accomplished. Can’t wait to see how that works out for them.

  40. 40.

    Mike Kay

    $64,000 question:

    If McCain loses the gop primary to teabagger J.D. Hayworth. (he’s currently tied 45-43), will he pull a lieberman and run as a 3rd party, or even switch to the Democratic party?

    This is gonna be so tasty.

  41. 41.

    beltane

    @Mike Kay: McCain is too lazy to do any of those things. Losing the Republican primary will just give him more time to appear on David Gregory’s show.

  42. 42.

    Alex S.

    Why would Obama hold his speech on Groundhog Day? This is the right day for Lost! (and for Groundhog Day)

  43. 43.

    El Cid

    I’m pretty sure I just heard Obama use the words “terror” and “terrorism” and said “We are at war,” and given what I’ve learned from right wing politicians and pundits over the past week that apparently is what will KeepUsSafe.

  44. 44.

    Leelee for Obama

    Just watched the President and I must say, I will feel prouder of him and of being an American at some point, I have no doubt, but he is a MENSCH! No hiding, no cringing, no cowering just the clear facts, the immediate steps and the future plans.

    “This is not a time for partisanship. This is a time for CITIZENSHIP!”

    I couldn’t be prouder of my President if he cured cancer, because he’s trying, in a way, to do exactly that. Trying to cure the cancer of fear and hatred that the last Administration worked so hard to spread.

  46. 46.

    ericvsthem

    @Mike Kay: going further with this thought: If McCain loses the primary, will Dancing Dave still book him every other Sunday, or will he only get to appear once a month?

  47. 47.

    Mike in NC

    I miss Lost. And Michael Emerson as Ben Linus, has there ever in the history of mankind been a creepier-looking dude? Yeeesh. Of course, that makes him perfect.

    I do hope he continues to get steady roles after “Lost” goes off the air this year. He’d be perfect as a generic GOP Senator on any number of shows.

  48. 48.

    jibeaux

    And South of I-10, if you’re around, would love to have you in diet and exercise peer pressure group. Although your name makes me think of gumbo and jambalaya and beignets. It’s a miracle I only need to lose 20 pounds.

    I am going to try an iPhone app for recording food and exercise. Hopefully I will not end up hungrily licking the iPhone.

  51. 51.

    Brachiator

    (Other times I think of Steele as the hood ornament that thinks it’s driving the car…)

    Steele is certainly the gift that keeps on giving (from Yahoo News).

    Top GOP congressional aides have demanded that their colleagues at the Republican National Committee rein in Chairman Michael Steele after Steele suggested House Republicans could not retake the majority this November.

  52. 52.

    El Cid

    If McCain loses the primary, I think it’s possible he may become a really interesting character, but I’m not sure he’ll be on the Sunday talkies any more if that happens.

  53. 53.

    Stroszek

    @MikeJ: SOTU vs. Lost is a bit of a toss-up for me. One offers a string of mind-bending ambiguities carefully crafted to distract and confuse a large cast of irrationally compulsive caricatures… the other one features the delightfully sinister Michael Emerson.

    Decisions, decisions…

  54. 54.

    Jim

    I’ve checked the link twice to see if that bit about McCain not seeking public forum to criticize Obama was snark. No sign of it.

    Is there any real chance Hayworth will beat Grampa Crankypants? God, I’d be tempted to send that bloated nitwit a donation

  55. 55.

    Leelee for Obama

    @Stroszek: Chuckle, chuckle, giggle, snort! Well done, Stroszek, well done.

    I finally gave up on Lost, because I was living with an Alzheimer’s patient at the time, and it was nearly as confusing as my regular day.

  56. 56.

    Ash

    I gave up on Lost in the third season. I checked out a few episodes of the last season, but decided that all the time travel crap was too lame to waste my time on.

  57. 57.

    maus

    @El Cid:

    If McCain loses the primary, I think it’s possible he may become a really interesting character, but I’m not sure he’ll be on the Sunday talkies any more if that happens.

    He’s too much of an entitled snot not to be.

  58. 58.

    Redshirt

    Don’t be badmoutin’ Lost, y’all. Also, please FSM: No spoilers on this site. I really, really don’t want to get spoiled.

    Also, McCain? Prepare for landing!!!!

  60. 60.

    valdivia

    Like LeeLee I was very happy with the Obama speech. But I am an O-Bot.

    As for McCain–words fail.

  62. 62.

    MikeJ

    Also, please FSM: No spoilers on this site. I really, really don’t want to get spoiled.

    The whole thing is in Tommy Westphall’s imagination.

  64. 64.

    Shell

    “ridiculously unaffordable ideas like government-run health care.”

    As opposed to a seemingly unending war and occupation of a country we had no good reason to invade? Want to take out the abacus on that one, Senator?

  67. 67.

    eemom

    @Leelee for Obama:

    right on sistah! I heard it on C-Span while I was driving home. I was already an O-bot, and now I’m an O-bot squared. Fuck the haters.

    “The buck stops with ME.” Damn if he didn’t say that like he meant it.

    And now if you will excuse me, I am going to go visit every church, synagogue, mosque and Buddhist temple I can find so that I can kneel down and give Thanks to every God out there for giving us this brilliant, sensible man and NOT McCain and……..[ugh]……..her.

  70. 70.

    Leelee for Obama

    @eemom: Careful of the knees, Dear! All the best Deities will be fine with a simple thanks. What counts is the appreciation for the gift, after all!

  71. 71.

    joe from Lowell

    @valdivia,

    Someday, I’m going to make a “Get off my lawn” joke, and nobody will get it, and I will actually have turned into an old man who shouts “Get off my lawn.”

  72. 72.

    Jay in Oregon

    @MikeJ:

    For the record, I totally agree with you.

    I was just confessing to my love of watching Ben Linus fuck with everyone’s heads on that show.

    I don’t remember who said it, but the ultimate LOST videogame should consist of Ben shooting you, inexplicably regaining your trust, trying to strangle you, inexplicably regaining your trust again…

  73. 73.

    Leelee for Obama

    @joe from Lowell: Remember Hobson in” Arthur”? He says, “I want to be younger.” And Arthur answers,”Sorry, it’s your job to be older.” If we live long enough, we become our parents, or something like that. It’s OK, it’s a Circle of Life sort of thing.

  77. 77.

    Gardenvarietygator

    Seems to me that McCain has not been on TV as much lately. Right after the election and for months after the inauguration he was on constantly. Lately I haven’t been hearing what he said as much. Either the blogs I read have gotten bored with him or the shows have realized he doesn’t get the ratings?

    At any rate my opinion of him is such that I think he can’t stand being ignored and had to do something to regain attention. Bah.

    I wonder if the political pundit shows also saw less viewership now the elections over? Have they been trying to keep the great drama going by having McCain on so often after the election? A lot of people were paying attention that had never followed politics before this year. I imagine both McCain and the media loved the attention and were sad its not the same.

  78. 78.

    asiangrrlMN

    @eemom: I knew the reference! I just got there waaay too late to make a comment that you would see. I like Supertramp, too.

    As for Gramps McCain…everything about him SCREAMS entitlement. Only for him, though, and not for anyone else. Hey, Gramps! You get the fuck off MY lawn!

  79. 79.

    asiangrrlMN

    @jibeaux: Hi! I’ve been trying to hunt you down so I could wish my new fake-wifey a Happy New Year. Do you remember fake-proposing to me? Well, I accepted! So, even though you probably won’t return to this thread, welcome to the family!

  80. 80.

    Mike G

    McCain leads the charge against “ridiculously unaffordable ideas like government-run health care.”

    And led the charge for affordable and realistic ideas like going to war against Russia over Georgia.

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