Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

You know it’s bad when the Project 2025 people have to create training videos on “How To Be Normal”.

There is no right way to do the wrong thing.

Nothing worth doing is easy.

Museums are not America’s attic for its racist shit.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Petty moves from a petty man.

This blog will pay for itself.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

The willow is too close to the house.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

Peak wingnut was a lie.

They are not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

Speaker Mike Johnson is a vile traitor to the House and the Constitution.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

Good lord, these people are nuts.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

The way to stop violence is to stop manufacturing the hatred that fuels it.

I don’t recall signing up for living in a dystopian sci-fi novel.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

Keep the Immigrants and deport the fascists!

It’s all just conspiracy shit beamed down from the mothership.

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Reader Interactions

45Comments

  1. 1.

    General Winfield Stuck

    Vista won’t run my version of Photoshop. Prolly for the best./ My skills in this area are tea bagging poster level anyways. So the world is safe.

  2. 2.

    GReynoldsCT00

    Can we do a mug too? I’d have fun using that at work all day…t-shirts only come out on weekends when it’s not 20 degrees

  7. 7.

    Comrade Jake

    I personally think it’s gonna be tough to beat the Tunchbama Feed Me. I’d pay for that on a mug for sure.

  8. 8.

    Laura W

    @SGEW: Can you pull the face off of this one and do something with the background to get rid of the beige corduroy whatever thingey is behind him? Some people want The Real Thing.
    OBEY would look good under this, perhaps?

    Once John decides on the images to start with I’ll send the Cafe Press graphics specs to the creators. Or you can probably just go dig them out yourselves in terms of png preference, sizing, resolution. For tees we need 10×10, obviously smaller for cups and thongs.

    Also somehow need to grab the masthead and logo stuff in the right resolution and sizing for front left over pocket on shirts, hoodies and mugs that don’t have Tunch on them. (This is so not my area of expertise so thanks in advance for patience!)

  9. 9.

    Comrade Jake

    I pretty much suck at this sort of thing, but if there’s any way to make something mocking FDL with the “Please show me on the doll where Obama touched you” line, I think that could be full of win.

  11. 11.

    SiubhanDuinne

    I didn’t really know what Cafe Press was all about so I went to their web site. In addition to t-shirts and mugs and duffels and stuff, you can apparently put your graphcs on baby rompers. And I’m just thinking that Sam Kitten would look totally squeeeeee in a Tunch-covered onesie. I can’t be alone in this. Just sayin’, Red Kitten.

  13. 13.

    mrstrailerco

    I have no photoshop skills to offer. I think that coffee mugs with some of the lexicon terms on one side and the definitions on the other would be cool.

    I vote for rebunk and IOKIYAR

  14. 14.

    cmorenc

    IMHO Tunch makes an excellent BJ mascot, suitable for the BJ T-Shirt. John, he may technically be your pet, you feed him and change his litter box etc, but he’s really become a community pet. Besides, we can give his ears and neck a virtual scratch without getting attacked like you risk in person.

  15. 15.

    Shell

    Oops, since they were to go for animal charities I just thought it had to be pet related. BJ….hmmm.

  21. 21.

    ChrisB

    Just a request that the t-shirt(s) be available in XXL. Not for me, of course, but for a friend. Yeah, that’s right, it’s for a friend.

  22. 22.

    TruthOfAngels

    Dear God, are you suggesting that Our Furry Leader ought not to be the only approved image? Are you mad?

    Up to you, o’ course, but you’re nearest to him. You will bear the brunt of his rage, and you’re not well.

    P.S. I have also sustained a serious injury to my shoulder. Fucker, isn’t it? I find myself sitting in the fracture clinic, looking at someone with a broken wrist and thinking ‘You lucky bastard!”

    And as for clearing up kitty litter, FUCK OUCH FUCK OUCH and that is all I have to say on the matter.

  23. 23.

    Steeplejack

    @SGEW:

    This version of the Tunch “Obey” is great. You need to airbrush that cancerous lesion shmutz on the White One’s nose.

  25. 25.

    asiangrrlMN

    “BJ related” and “whipping it out” should not be in the same sent–oh, up. Whipping it up. Nebber mind. I, for one, will buy that Tunch Obey logo on ANYTHING!

  29. 29.

    sacrablue

    I have some experience creating artwork for screenprinters. If you want a particular image to be redrawn in spot colors I am willing to attempt it. My business is in the dumps anyway, so I have plenty of time. My four kittehs won’t mind if I work on someone else’s.

  30. 30.

    licensed to kill time

    @Laura W:

    For tees we need 10×10, obviously smaller for cups and thongs.

    LOL, whut? are we talking athletic supporters and Brazilbuttfloss for some kind of BJ game?

  31. 31.

    Comrade Darkness

    Gah, can we get a more specific deadline? work is tight right now, and I need a few days to let the idea moulder.

    Oh, wait, it’s cafe press, IS there a deadline?

  32. 32.

    Arguingwithsignposts - ipod touchs

    I am not near my laptop now, but I’ve posted my bj tshirt idea several times before. It’s on my photo bucket acct near smudge.

  33. 33.

    Nellcote

    Is there a cache of Tunch/Lilly pix to work from somewhere or does one need to go back through old threads for the photos?

  35. 35.

    Mrs. Peel

    Time to bring a little PR reality to the table. Tunch has bossy appeal that will carry over to basic commands like “Feed Me” and “Obey”.

    On the other hand, Lily is a cute dog in a world of cute dogs. She doesn’t translate into anything snarky or sarcastic. Her appeal is more of a matter of personal bias than marketability. Like grandkids. How many strangers would want a picture of your grandkids on their clothing? Probably just a few close friends and that’s it. And then it would permanently end up in the drawer after just one wearing.

  36. 36.

    Laura W

    @licensed to kill time/Nellcote: Also search the archives under “Open Thread”. John does not always tag his pet photos under the appropriate species.

    @Comrade Darkness: There is no deadline. For the sake of expediency and keeping the current momentum rolling, we might just start with a few images and slogans and build from there. Adding stuff as we go along is easy. There seems to be a consensus so far on a few of the Tunch graphics (and real photo) being quite desirable, along with the BJ banner logo and both slogans that have been used with it. Probably start there.
    Er, I mean, pending John’s approval, of course.

  38. 38.

    Comrade Darkness

    @Laura W: Wait, I wasn’t supposed to just make something?

    yfrog.com/07lily2draft1j

    I have a large version of it, obv, but it’d be good to get a higher res version of the lily pic used in it. If needed, that is.

    I have some other ideas, should I just fire away text descriptions of them here and await further orders?

  39. 39.

    Folderol and Ephemera

    Had a few minutes, so a third try at OBEY, w/ quick nose fix:

    link

    Tho’ I still think my posse one’s my favorite. But then, I remember the original stuff in Providence, back in the early, early 90’s, so it has personal nostalgia for me (I’m nostalgic for early Fairey work! Kurt Cobain died more than 15 years ago! A year from now, someone born in the nineties will be able to buy alcohol! Feelin’ old, yo.).

    [also, @Comrade Darkness: Nice! If Lily was my overlord, I would definitely welcome her (tho’ mai kitteh might have a problem w/ that). Also, also: the Simpsons episode “Deep Space Homer” aired almost sixteen years ago.]

  41. 41.

    Laura W

    @Comrade Darkness: Got it, thanks. I think just send John whatever you whip up and he can pick and choose what goes into the store for the first cyber shelf stocking. We’ll probably set some sort of limit initially on images and choices just to get it underway and get a good assortment in there within reason. Whatever that means.

  42. 42.

    Lumpy

    What about “UNITED PASTRY JIHAD”…?

    You already have some artwork for that, and it would be perfect on a coffee mug.

  43. 43.

    Comrade Darkness

    @Laura W: I finally read the instructions (not my thing, at all) and sent it direct to him. I’m sure he’ll figure it out. I have one more cute idea I’m going to try. And some lame ideas I’ll toss out for others if I don’t get inspired to actually do them.

    @Folderol and Ephemera: Thanks. I thought it fitting in contrast to Tunch to demonstrate that they mostly lord over us through playin’ our heartstrings like a harp.

  44. 44.

    djESNO

    FWIW……I think a black tee with just the carnival barker and balloon logo on the front (in negative white) and the old tagline “hot air and ill-informed banter” on the back shoulders (as though it was a name on an athletic jersey) would be awesome…..just sayin’.

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