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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Shoulder Update

Shoulder Update

by John Cole|  January 18, 20102:36 pm| 150 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads

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Spent the whole morning at various medical appointments, and I will be having arthroscopic surgery and then a procedure to pin/screw my glenoid back together next Tuesday. Until then- pain pills and limited movement. Rehab starts three days after surgery.

And according to my Doctor, I really messed my shoulder up- I basically used the ball joint on my humerus as a battering ram and shredded the glenoid.

In other news, Lily and Tunch still love me, although Tunch might be faking it for food.

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Reader Interactions

150Comments

  1. 1.

    arguingwithsignposts

    January 18, 2010 at 2:38 pm

    Sorry to hear the bad news about the shoulder, JC. In the meantime, maybe you can find some more leftie bloggers to piss off? :)

  2. 2.

    GReynoldsCT00

    January 18, 2010 at 2:38 pm

    We’ve missed you! Are you having both things done the same day?

  3. 3.

    Skepticat

    January 18, 2010 at 2:40 pm

    Guess I can’t talk you into coming over to shovel the driveway, huh? I have more than sympathy pain in my shoulders and back from this concrete, er, snow.

    Yes, the love of a good animal is a fine, fine thing. And love from two is gravy.

  4. 4.

    geg6

    January 18, 2010 at 2:40 pm

    Man, John. When you hurt yourself, you go for the gold, don’t you? None of this sounds fun. Poor man.

  5. 5.

    licensed to kill time

    January 18, 2010 at 2:41 pm

    Aw, you know Tunch loves you – or at least loves your opposable thumbs.

    Best wishes to you getting through the surgery, etc.

    ETA: I know you dislike the pain drugs, but I must say I had the finest drugs of my life right before surgery for my broken ankle. It might have been fentanyl, man it made me one with the universe ;-)

  6. 6.

    mr. whipple

    January 18, 2010 at 2:42 pm

    Jeebus, dood. Best wishes, hang in there.

    (and thanks for that link Friday night.)

  7. 7.

    You Don't Say

    January 18, 2010 at 2:42 pm

    Good luck with all that, John. I hope you’ve found the right pain med solution. I had minor surgery last year and found the 800mg ibuprofin worked much better than the percodan. Like you, I didn’t like the way I felt on percs. Take care of yourself.

  8. 8.

    Morbo

    January 18, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    I basically used the ball joint on my humerus as a battering ram and shredded the glenoid.

    And now you’ve gotten my imagination working, fun visual there.

  9. 9.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    Glad to hear from you, Cole, even if the news is not so great. I was a tad worried that Tunch had eaten you last night. Take your pain meds like a good lad and rest up with Lily and Tunch.

  10. 10.

    SGEW

    January 18, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    I basically used the ball joint on my humerus as a battering ram and shredded the glenoid.

    That is just awful! Much sympathy.

    Best wishes, and good luck with the surgery.

  11. 11.

    Tara the antisocial social worker

    January 18, 2010 at 2:44 pm

    That totally sucks. My dogs send sympathy dog-kisses. (The cats send regal looks and demands for food, but whadya expect?)

  12. 12.

    Redshirt

    January 18, 2010 at 2:44 pm

    Seriously: Don’t get hooked on the pain pills. My brother got injured in the army, went on the pills, and has never gotten off them, years later. Damn shame all around.

  13. 13.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    January 18, 2010 at 2:46 pm

    Good luck to you John. May you be treated by at least one of the nursing students I’ve met here in Michigan. Hooo-aaa.

  14. 14.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 2:46 pm

    @Tara the antisocial social worker: May I just say that I love your username? Well, I do.

    @arguingwithsignposts: I am ashamed to say that I thought of that, too, when I read ‘glenoid’.

  15. 15.

    arguingwithsignposts

    January 18, 2010 at 2:47 pm

    @Morbo:

    I basically used the ball joint on my humerus as a battering ram and shredded the glenoid.

    I thought we shredded the glenoid in that 800+ comment thread yesterday?

  16. 16.

    R-Jud

    January 18, 2010 at 2:47 pm

    I basically used the ball joint on my humerus as a battering ram and shredded the glenoid.

    Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow. Ugh. Ow. Yes, I would also say you messed your shoulder up.

  17. 17.

    geg6

    January 18, 2010 at 2:48 pm

    Just quit taking the crazy pain pills, John. Like you, I can’t take anything like Percocet or stuff like that. When they had to break my jaw to get my wisdom teeth out, I took the Perc for exactly one day. I then called my oral surgeon and insisted on something that didn’t lower my IQ a hundred points. I did just fine on 600mg Motrin.

  18. 18.

    Shell

    January 18, 2010 at 2:50 pm

    I was wondering how you were doing. Thanks for the update but, man!

    And Lily damn well better love you, you took the bullet for her!

  19. 19.

    techno

    January 18, 2010 at 2:51 pm

    OUCH!

    Take it slow and easy. Try not to get frustrated trying to manage in a world one-handed. And don’t expect to feel normal for at LEAST a year.

    Ignore the fear-mongers and take your pain meds. And if something isn’t working, ask to have your prescription changed. Pain slows the healing process for a wide assortment of known reasons. Let the next guy be tough!

  20. 20.

    Chat Noir

    January 18, 2010 at 2:52 pm

    although Tunch might be faking it for food

    Cats have staff, don’tcha know.

    Take care of yourself, John Cole. Sorry you’re banged up so badly. But gawd love you for not falling on Lily. You really are a mensch.

  21. 21.

    horatius

    January 18, 2010 at 2:53 pm

    I am sure Tunch loves you to death Mr. Cole. Now if you give me your bank account number, I’ll transfer a few millions from a Nigerian friend of mine.

  22. 22.

    horatius

    January 18, 2010 at 2:54 pm

    Good luck with the recovery.

  23. 23.

    Chat Noir

    January 18, 2010 at 2:54 pm

    @geg6:

    When they had to break my jaw to get my wisdom teeth out

    Gaah and oy vey!

  24. 24.

    Comrade Mary

    January 18, 2010 at 2:55 pm

    Aw, man, John. That really, really sucks. It sucks so much I can’t even think of an evil/fat Tunch joke right now.

    Has your doctor suggested any way you can develop a meds regimen that dulls the pain and not the rest of you? I know others have mentioned staying ahead of the pain by taking ibuprofen on an aggressive but safe schedule, never skipping a dose EVER.

    I found that with my much milder shoulder problems over the past year that it was a challenge to apply cold to the right spot. I did find that if I placed a coldpack (not an icebag) on my bed or couch, lying against it was soothing and seemed to relieve the associated inflammation to some degree. Getting ice on the ball of your shoulder or the front is a right royal pain, but applying cold from the back is relatively easy.

  25. 25.

    SteveinSC

    January 18, 2010 at 2:55 pm

    I think the glenoid is sort of like an adenoid only different. There, wisdom of the ages.

  26. 26.

    mr. whipple

    January 18, 2010 at 2:55 pm

    When they had to break my jaw to get my wisdom teeth out, I took the Perc for exactly one day.

    For some reason stuff like that doesn’t seem to lesson the pain for me as much as not give a fuck about it.

  27. 27.

    San

    January 18, 2010 at 2:55 pm

    Yikes.

    Are you able to sleep in bed at night? Strategically places pillows might help if you are having a hard time finding (and keeping) a comfortable position.

  28. 28.

    geg6

    January 18, 2010 at 2:56 pm

    @techno:

    Ignore the fear-mongers and take your pain meds.

    I agree with you about the hysteria in regard to getting addicted. Most people will not have that problem. However, based on what John has posted about how the meds he’s been given make him feel, I think he’s crazy to keep taking them when there are other meds that can control the pain without all the debilitating side effects of the narcotic pain meds. I will, personally, never again take such meds unless I’m unconscious and in the hospital. 600 or 800 mg of Motrin can handle pretty much any pain for me.

  29. 29.

    Folderol and Ephemera

    January 18, 2010 at 2:56 pm

    Not to be a DFH, but seriously – Since you have said that your pain alleviation medication has side effects that you are less than happy with, perhaps you should try marijuana (steeped as tea, or cooked into pastry; smoke is bad for you).

  30. 30.

    donovong

    January 18, 2010 at 2:59 pm

    Okay, I admit that I had to look up glenoid, but only because my imagination was having way too much fun.

    Hang in there, man, and keep us posted. Enjoy the drugs, but not too much.

  31. 31.

    dr. bloor

    January 18, 2010 at 2:59 pm

    In other news, Lily and Tunch still love me, although Tunch might be faking it for food.

    Tunch has always been faking it for the food, dear boy.

    If you’re worried about pain pill addiction, cruise over to GOS and read through the comments about recent polls for the MA election tomorrow. It certainly won’t kill the pain, but it’s the intellectual equivalent of taking a hammer to your head, and will get your mind off your shoulder for a while.

  32. 32.

    geg6

    January 18, 2010 at 3:00 pm

    @Chat Noir:

    Oh, yeah. That was loads of fun. My oral surgeon told me that for someone as small boned and skinny as I am, I have the world’s largest roots on my teeth. And the roots of my wisdom teeth were so long that they wrapped all the way around my lower jaw bone. There was no way to get them out without breaking the jaw. The bright spot was that I lost about 20 pounds on a diet of ice cream and milkshakes.

  33. 33.

    flukebucket

    January 18, 2010 at 3:00 pm

    used the ball joint on my humerus as a battering ram

    Kinda like McCray vs Warner I guess.

  34. 34.

    Betsy

    January 18, 2010 at 3:01 pm

    Ugh, that’s awful! If I lived remotely nearby I would bring you cookies. Homemade cookies make everything better.

  35. 35.

    Max

    January 18, 2010 at 3:03 pm

    I don’t know what any of that means, but it sounds miserable.

    In less painful news, but almost as miserable, can I just vent that the weather in the Bay Area SUCKS! We’ve got 5 different winter storms blowing through this week and it’s raining about 1 inch per hour and the wind is howling and I hate it.

    The facility I manage is leaking like a seive (sieve?) and there is no end in sight.

    My dog is perpetually muddy, and for a long-haired Wheaten in need of a haircut, its a mess.

    /rant

  36. 36.

    Sentient Puddle

    January 18, 2010 at 3:03 pm

    @Chat Noir: Well, from my understanding, SOP for removing wisdom teeth IS cracking the jaw in some form or another. Though I may be wrong about that…all I know is that wisdom tooth removal is a pretty ugly process, and I’m rather glad that I was sedated during the extraction of mine.

  37. 37.

    Genine

    January 18, 2010 at 3:04 pm

    Yikes! Get well, John and good luck with the physical therapy.

  38. 38.

    Punchy

    January 18, 2010 at 3:04 pm

    The good news is, even with a shoulder like that, you could still probably pitch for the Pirates.

  39. 39.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    January 18, 2010 at 3:06 pm

    @geg6:

    Holy frijoles. That sounds like an alien creature invaded and colonized your mouth. Sorry you had to go through that!

  40. 40.

    John Cole

    January 18, 2010 at 3:06 pm

    @geg6: I threw out the percs about twenty minutes ago. I basically quit taking them yesterday, choosing to live in pain and coherent rather than a zombie. The doctor prescribed something called Lortab, which he said was much, much milder and won’t leave me feeling like I am Sam.

  41. 41.

    The Main Gauche of Mild Reason

    January 18, 2010 at 3:07 pm

    Not to rub it in, but I assume this means that your attempts to relocate your shoulder made the problem worse, John?

  42. 42.

    John Cole

    January 18, 2010 at 3:07 pm

    @San: Sleeping in the la-z-boy. Can not lie down with the brace.

  43. 43.

    Betsy

    January 18, 2010 at 3:08 pm

    @Max:
    Those of us in New England cry no tears for you. Just sayin’.

  44. 44.

    John Cole

    January 18, 2010 at 3:09 pm

    @Betsy: I can send you my address. Butterscotch Raisin are my favorite!

  45. 45.

    John Cole

    January 18, 2010 at 3:10 pm

    @The Main Gauche of Mild Reason: No- they said they were surprised I had the presence of mind to do it, and probably saved myself from a dilaudid shot and time lying on a bed with weights attached to my arm trying to pop it back.

  46. 46.

    Chat Noir

    January 18, 2010 at 3:10 pm

    @Sentient Puddle: I had my four wisdom teeth pulled when I was 18. The roots weren’t nearly as long as geg6’s. I just remember having gauze in my mouth to soak up the blood (and watching The Tonight Show starring Johnny Carson). I don’t remember having a whole lot of pain, just some mild discomfort. And my cheeks puffed up big time.

  47. 47.

    R-Jud

    January 18, 2010 at 3:10 pm

    @geg6:

    And the roots of my wisdom teeth were so long that they wrapped all the way around my lower jaw bone.

    I had the same issue. And I WOKE UP while they were working on me. Basically, there was a guy with both fists and a pair of pliers stuffed in my mouth, twisting with all his might.

    I took the opiates, just so I’d forget about it.

  48. 48.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 3:10 pm

    @John Cole: If Betsy is sending out homemade cookies, I can send her my address, too. No, I don’t have a shattered shoulder, but cookies! Yum.

  49. 49.

    David Hunt

    January 18, 2010 at 3:11 pm

    Mr. Cole,

    I was going to make a possibly humorous comment about you finally becoming a leftist for real, but couldn’t figure out how to do it without being too uncomfortable about it being in poor taste.

    On the bright side, Tunch is not faking love for you to get food. He really does love you…because you feed him.

  50. 50.

    GReynoldsCT00

    January 18, 2010 at 3:13 pm

    @geg6:

    OMG that makes me queasy just thinking about it…

  51. 51.

    Brachiator

    January 18, 2010 at 3:14 pm

    @John Cole:

    I basically used the ball joint on my humerus as a battering ram and shredded the glenoid.

    Hmmm. So no good sense of humerus, eh?

    I can truly understand the sleeping in the la-z-boy. Hang in there.

  52. 52.

    Jules

    January 18, 2010 at 3:15 pm

    Ouch and awwwww for the pet love.

    And now for the Zoolander lovers out there, Ladies and Gentleman, I give you…..Dere-lict!!!

    http://projectrungay.blogspot.com/2010/01/vivienne-westwood-menswear-fall-2010.html

  53. 53.

    RedKitten

    January 18, 2010 at 3:15 pm

    Yeah, Percocet’s scary stuff. (Don’t throw it in the garbage though, John — have one of your friends bring it to a drugstore for proper disposal.) I know my hubby was worried that they’d prescribe it to him when he had his knee surgery on Friday, but they gave him something else…Tramacet, it’s called.

  54. 54.

    RedKitten

    January 18, 2010 at 3:18 pm

    @John Cole: Butterscotch raisin cookies? I’ve never tried such a beast…now I’m intrigued, Cole.

  55. 55.

    geg6

    January 18, 2010 at 3:18 pm

    @R-Jud:

    Holy crap, I’ve never met anyone else who had this problem! Glad to see I’m not as weird as I thought.

    there was a guy with both fists and a pair of pliers stuffed in my mouth, twisting with all his might.

    LOL! I didn’t wake up, but my ex had taken me to the appointment and he told me that at one point they called him into the surgical room. They needed him to help hold me down as the surgeon pulled. He said when he walked in, the oral surgeon was on his knees on the arm of the chair I was in, pulling with both hands. That was the one time my ex was completely and totally solicitous of me since he’d seen what I’d gone through. He pampered me until they took the wires out of my jaw.

  56. 56.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 3:19 pm

    @geg6: Ow. Just…ow.

  57. 57.

    Betsy

    January 18, 2010 at 3:19 pm

    @John Cole:
    You are welcome to send me your address, and I will send you cookies. I can’t promise butterscotch raisin, though, since I’ve never made anything like that. You might have to settle for chocolate chip and/or brown sugar cookies.

  58. 58.

    bemused

    January 18, 2010 at 3:20 pm

    John, I would guess that Tunch is trying to take advantage of any hint of you being less alert to his wily ways to be fed more. It’s how cats roll. We know or suspect they are just playing on our emotions for whatever they want most of the time but who can resist?

  59. 59.

    Chat Noir

    January 18, 2010 at 3:20 pm

    @Max:

    My dog is perpetually muddy, and for a long-haired Wheaten in need of a haircut, its a mess.

    Our stinky Wheaten just needs a bath and a grooming this weekend. He has a puppy cut so we don’t have to deal with the mess you do.

  60. 60.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    January 18, 2010 at 3:20 pm

    In hopes of making anyone feel better about anything, here are more pictures of Christina Hendricks:

    http://thesuperficial.com/2010/01/everything_you_need_to_know_ab.php

  61. 61.

    geg6

    January 18, 2010 at 3:22 pm

    @John Cole:

    I’m glad you’re off the Percs. I hate those things with a passion. I simply do not understand how anyone could get addicted to any drug that makes you feel like those things made me feel.

    Perhaps some people LIKE feeling stupid, I guess.

  62. 62.

    Ruckus

    January 18, 2010 at 3:22 pm

    @Max:
    North bay here and as much as we can use rain and snow for the water table, jeezzz already. Even Bud who loves to go for walks is getting tired of the rain.
    I take him out after dressing like a north sea fisherman, he sniffs around and heads right back for the door. Hope he doesn’t explode before he decides to go.

  63. 63.

    Notorious P.A.T.

    January 18, 2010 at 3:23 pm

    They needed him to help hold me down as the surgeon pulled. He said when he walked in, the oral surgeon was on his knees on the arm of the chair I was in, pulling with both hands.

    Ah, the joys of cutting-edge modern medical science.

  64. 64.

    Max

    January 18, 2010 at 3:23 pm

    @Chat Noir: Max heads to the groomers on Thursday.

    He’s in the show cut, bangs and beard, and its been a couple months since his last haircut.

    Aren’t they the best dogs in the world?

  65. 65.

    Davis X. Machina

    January 18, 2010 at 3:25 pm

    Perhaps some people LIKE feeling stupid, I guess.

    Dextromethorphan has its fans, and that’s it’s only attraction near as I can tell.

  66. 66.

    Demo Woman

    January 18, 2010 at 3:25 pm

    John, Do you have an Amazon wish list?
    Even though you don’t like to be nagged, I am going to mention that if you are concerned about the doctors up in West Virginia, Atlanta has wonderful hospitals and surgical facilities.

  67. 67.

    ericvsthem

    January 18, 2010 at 3:25 pm

    John – I work for very large medical device company that specializes in orthopaedic trauma. Our sales force works very closely with surgeons, often attending surgeries and assisting OR staff with questions regarding the implants and instrument sets. If you have any concerns with your surgeons, questions regarding the type of procedure, or about the quality of orthopaedic care at your hospital, let me know. I’m happy to ask around on your behalf.

  68. 68.

    Svensker

    January 18, 2010 at 3:26 pm

    Good grief, Cole.

    Here’s hoping that you’re able to sleep lots, not have too much pain, and mend soon. Crikey. Also hope you’ve ordered Lily’s booties so you don’t do the same to the other side on your next walkin’ in the ice adventure.

    OT — can anyone confirm that potato chips fit in with a well-balanced low-carb diet? I’m thinking they do.

  69. 69.

    Sentient Puddle

    January 18, 2010 at 3:26 pm

    I’m pouring one for all of you with wisdom teeth horror stories. I mean yikes, those sound painful. My experience, in comparison, is that the oral surgeon whipped out some magic and made my wisdom teeth vanish in a puff of smoke. The only time I ever took any pain pills (I forget what they gave me) was when the numbness started to wear off, and I started thinking “Well, I’m not feeling any pain, but I probably should down a few just in case…”

    Seriously, the worst part of it was how annoyed I was that I couldn’t eat solid foods initially (I was all defiant and ate some pizza the second night, and still, no problems other than the fact that it was a bit awkward).

  70. 70.

    morzer

    January 18, 2010 at 3:27 pm

    John, feel better. My cat wants to tell you that loving someone for food is a much better love, because as long as you have the magic tin-opening fingers, that love will never end. Sex, money.. those are just trite. Food love lasts a life-time!

  71. 71.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 3:28 pm

    @Ruckus: Awwwww, Bud is such a cutie. Give him a hug for me.

    Moar animal pics, plz, kthxbai.

    @Svensker: Yes, they do. Of course, I am simply making that up, so YMMV.

    @Sentient Puddle: I had no prob with my wisdom teeth extraction, either. On a crown-filling, though, I had to tell the dentist that the Novocain was NOT doing its job.

    Obligatory: TUUUUUNCH!

  72. 72.

    geg6

    January 18, 2010 at 3:30 pm

    @Sentient Puddle:

    I’m pouring one for all of you with wisdom teeth horror stories. I mean yikes, those sound painful.

    LOL, thanks. But to be honest, I was completely out when it was happening and the Motrin took care of the pain when it was all over. The worst thing was having the jaws wired shut for 8 weeks. And even that had the up side of a wonderfully svelte figure when that was over. Sadly, though, I didn’t want ice cream for about a year afterward. And ice cream is my favorite dessert evah.

    The poor ex, however, was completely traumatized.

  73. 73.

    Chat Noir

    January 18, 2010 at 3:31 pm

    @Max: I saw a picture you posted of him recently. He is a handsome boy.

    Danny is my husband’s dog and a wee bit mental. Can’t say I’m a big fan of the breed after dealing with some of his shenanigans (my husband didn’t do a great job of training him when Danny was a puppy, before he met me). Apparently, he flunked out of puppy school and is kind of a flake. But he makes for a good alarm system because he has the most vicious sounding bark ever (but he’s just a big wuss).

  74. 74.

    Jennie

    January 18, 2010 at 3:31 pm

    Do you have any idea what your shoulder would cost if you didn’t have insurance? What would happen if you didn’t have the money?

  75. 75.

    Demo Woman

    January 18, 2010 at 3:33 pm

    @Sentient Puddle: That was my experience. I did need to use a tea bag for comfort but that was about it.

  76. 76.

    Violet

    January 18, 2010 at 3:33 pm

    Wow, you really did a number on your shoulder. Sorry it’s so bad. Hopefully the surgery will go well and rehab will be successful and you’ll be back fully mobile in relatively short order.

  77. 77.

    Jennie

    January 18, 2010 at 3:33 pm

    It would be interesting to know what your shoulder would cost if you didn’t have insurance; also what would happen if you didn’t have the money.

  78. 78.

    El Cid

    January 18, 2010 at 3:34 pm

    Good luck John. No punching anyone in the neck for a while.

  79. 79.

    J.

    January 18, 2010 at 3:34 pm

    Am looking forward to your press conference where you explain to your followers that you took HGH for us, so you could get back to blogging faster.

    Hope the surgery is a success and that you are able to scratch and feed Tunch and Lily the way they have become accustomed.

  80. 80.

    Sentient Puddle

    January 18, 2010 at 3:35 pm

    @asiangrrlMN:

    On a crown-filling, though, I had to tell the dentist that the Novocain was NOT doing its job.

    OK, that one I can sort of relate to. Novacain was not working during a regular filling once for me. They kept upping the dosage until they reached the limit, at which point they said “Well, that’s about as far as we can go. You’re either going to bear through it, or we’ll find some sort of temporary solution.” I don’t remember what exactly that solution was, but ultimately, it came down to the fact that I had a partially-drilled tooth. So I grasped the armrests as hard as I could and opted for the Pain.

  81. 81.

    Max

    January 18, 2010 at 3:36 pm

    @Chat Noir: With a terrier, training is everything and keeping them busy is everything else.

    I hammered Maxy with classes and take him with me everywhere, including work a couple days a week, and he has a dog-walker who takes him out on the trails in Oakland 3 days a week.

  82. 82.

    Carrie

    January 18, 2010 at 3:37 pm

    Gawd, sounds brutal.
    I also spent the morning at the hospital with my Dad.
    He’s 87 and has a mass on his right lung, biopsy later this week.
    Hospitals are not the cheeriest of places, eh?

  83. 83.

    gwangung

    January 18, 2010 at 3:39 pm

    @Notorious P.A.T.: Um. Wow….

    Didn’t know Christina Hendricks was before. Now I do. Indeliably.

  84. 84.

    jeffreyw

    January 18, 2010 at 3:41 pm

    I’d send this on over to ya, but I done eated it.

  85. 85.

    valdivia

    January 18, 2010 at 3:44 pm

    Oy John. I hope you are able to manage on the pain killers until you have the surgery. Feel better.

    I personally chose to believe Tunch loves you. Not in it for the food.

  86. 86.

    dr. bloor

    January 18, 2010 at 3:46 pm

    Will the BJ Executive Order place Tunch in charge while you’re under anesthesia, or will you hand things over to Lily and leave Tunch free to shoot his friends in the face?

  87. 87.

    Chad N Freude

    January 18, 2010 at 3:46 pm

    I don’t find anything humerus about it. You have my sympathy, my empathy (I’ve had a shoulder accident, but not as bad as yours), and no advice to give.

  88. 88.

    Chat Noir

    January 18, 2010 at 3:46 pm

    @Max:

    With a terrier, training is everything and keeping them busy is everything else.

    Exactly. And terriers can be very stubborn. My husband wasn’t nearly as diligent in the training department as you were with Max. He sounds like a lovely dog.

  89. 89.

    Chat Noir

    January 18, 2010 at 3:48 pm

    @jeffreyw: OK, now that’s just cruel.

    Yum-oh!

  90. 90.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 3:49 pm

    @Sentient Puddle: OUCH! Then again, I take ibuprofen AND Excedrin before getting anything done to my teeth, so I’m already one up on the game. I have a small mouth, and I have TMJ, so dentistry is always fun.

    @jeffreyw: You suck. And, not in a good way. WANT!

  91. 91.

    CaseyL

    January 18, 2010 at 3:50 pm

    Oh, jeez, John. The whole right side of my body just cringed.

    Will you be in touch with anyone here – another front pager, or one of the regulars – who can do a post-op post, let us know how you’re doing? Because we’re really going to worry about you and want to know.

    Hang in there.

  92. 92.

    Chad N Freude

    January 18, 2010 at 3:52 pm

    @Chad N Freude: I was given Percodan. It didn’t kill the pain, but it made the pain kind of interesting and fun.

  93. 93.

    R-Jud

    January 18, 2010 at 3:52 pm

    @jeffreyw: Real whipped cream is awesome. I think I will make myself some hot chocolate as a vehicle for it right now.

  94. 94.

    Chad N Freude

    January 18, 2010 at 3:54 pm

    @asiangrrlMN:

    I have a small mouth

    Please, no obvious bad-joke set-ups.

  95. 95.

    Chad N Freude

    January 18, 2010 at 3:56 pm

    @Demo Woman:

    I did need to use a tea bag for comfort

    No comment.

  96. 96.

    Ruckus

    January 18, 2010 at 3:56 pm

    @R-Jud:
    Had mine removed in the service. Pliers couldn’t get them out so they used hammer and chisel. You might be able to imagine how I felt about military medicine.

  97. 97.

    RedKitten

    January 18, 2010 at 3:56 pm

    @Max: How would you say Wheatens are wrt energy level, compared to other terriers? In another few years, we’re going to look at getting another dog. We love terriers (we like dogs with a bit of attitude), but don’t want a situation where if you have to leave the dog alone for 5 minutes, it trashes the place out of boredom.

  98. 98.

    jeffreyw

    January 18, 2010 at 3:57 pm

    @R-Jud: LOL, that’s just what I did today, started with the whipped cream and then figured out what to put it on. I was sure I had cherries for a nice cobbler, but nooo…

  99. 99.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 3:59 pm

    @Ruckus: Oh my god. I can’t even imagine. I gotta say, my mom experienced tooth extraction with no Novocain in the old country, and this still sounds more painful.

    @Chad N Freude: How come I knew someone would go there?

    @CaseyL: I second this. Someone needs to be liveblogging your surgery, Cole. Er, ok, maybe not that, but we definitely will require updates. And, Tunchie pics.

  100. 100.

    R-Jud

    January 18, 2010 at 3:59 pm

    @Ruckus:

    they used hammer and chisel.

    “They” did that to my Dad, too. It is why he avoids the dentist now.

  101. 101.

    RedKitten

    January 18, 2010 at 4:00 pm

    @CaseyL:

    Will you be in touch with anyone here – another front pager, or one of the regulars – who can do a post-op post, let us know how you’re doing? Because we’re really going to worry about you and want to know.

    That’s a really good point. Can Tammy get front-page privileges in order to update us? Or if she could even pass along the news to Tim, Doug or Anne Laurie, that’d be great.

  102. 102.

    Betsy

    January 18, 2010 at 4:01 pm

    @John Cole:
    p.s. I totally meant it, BTW. Just email me your address. I think you have my email, but if not tell me and I’ll send it to you.

  103. 103.

    Mnemosyne

    January 18, 2010 at 4:06 pm

    It sounds like when the orthopedist was showing me the MRI of my injured knee and said, “See that little ball of mush? That used to be your ACL.”

    His bedside manner kinda sucked, but he was a good surgeon.

    John, you should see if they have something like they had for my knee for your shoulder. It was basically a water-filled wrap that was connected to a cooler full of ice water with a motor. Instead of continually having to change ice packs, we just filled up the cooler, turned on the motor, and I had a constant circulation of ice water surrounding my knee. It was pretty awesome, though after a week or so I couldn’t take the whining sound of the motor any longer.

  104. 104.

    R-Jud

    January 18, 2010 at 4:06 pm

    @jeffreyw: I was never really exposed to proper whipped cream before I moved over this side of the pond. Then my mother-in-law planted a trifle in front of me that had a (I am guessing) thirty-two inch layer of the stuff on it, and I am never ever going back to the Redi-Wip. Ever ever.

    Then there is clotted cream. It is amazing, amazing stuff. I am now thinking that this week’s treat will be scones with clotted cream and jam.

  105. 105.

    Chad N Freude

    January 18, 2010 at 4:07 pm

    @asiangrrlMN:

    How come I knew someone would go there?

    Because you chose the phrasing as a deliberate provocation?

  106. 106.

    Chat Noir

    January 18, 2010 at 4:12 pm

    @RedKitten: Don’t know about Max’s Max, but my husband’s Wheaten is a slug, especially in warm weather. He much prefers cooler or cold weather; he likes to go for walks or ride in the car. As he’s gotten older (he’ll be 11 in the spring), though, he seems to be more cranky and snips sometimes out of the blue, usually if there’s some kind of food stuffs on the floor.

    Max’s Max sounds like a better behaved Wheaten than my husband’s.

  107. 107.

    Demo Woman

    January 18, 2010 at 4:13 pm

    @Chad N Freude: Let me explain.. lol
    When you have a tooth pulled a wet tea bag, never mind.. I just digging a deeper hole here.

  108. 108.

    Mnemosyne

    January 18, 2010 at 4:15 pm

    @Sentient Puddle:

    Novacain was not working during a regular filling once for me. They kept upping the dosage until they reached the limit, at which point they said “Well, that’s about as far as we can go. You’re either going to bear through it, or we’ll find some sort of temporary solution.”

    Yikes! When I went to get my first root canal, I was really nervous and asked if they could give me some nitrous oxide. (It doesn’t do much for the pain, but it makes me not care.) The endodontist said no, because it was raining that day and I didn’t have anyone to give me a ride home.

    I said, “Well, can you load me up with as much Novocain as possible?”

    He flipped through my chart and said, “Yeah, we can do that.”

    I was numb up to my forehead, but the procedure didn’t hurt a bit.

    (Afterwards was another story, but even that was taken care of with some ibuprofen.)

  109. 109.

    Ruckus

    January 18, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    @R-Jud:
    Fortunately for me I figured it was just the one crappy dentist, after the dental service captain saw me and promised that steps would be taken. Not sure they were positive steps but what the hell, steps.

  110. 110.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 4:19 pm

    @Chad N Freude: I did not! Not this time, anyway. My reputation precedes me.

  111. 111.

    gogol's wife

    January 18, 2010 at 4:20 pm

    I wish you all the best with the operation and your recovery.

  112. 112.

    Robertdsc-iphone

    January 18, 2010 at 4:22 pm

    So you’re on the 60-day disabled list? I think we’ll have to use Tunch in your rotation spot rather than come out of the bullpen.

    On a serious note, best wishes on the surgery & here’s hoping for a speedy recovery.

  113. 113.

    R-Jud

    January 18, 2010 at 4:23 pm

    @Ruckus: Dad’s dentist wasn’t military.

    Just Catholic.

  114. 114.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 4:25 pm

    @Chad N Freude: P.S. I have decided to go innuendo-free for the rest of the day, just to prove I can. You are all my witness on this now mostly-dead thread.

  115. 115.

    daryljfontaine

    January 18, 2010 at 4:28 pm

    @Notorious P.A.T.: My filthy, filthy mind read the caption to the photos as “Christina Hendricks and the Golden Globes.”

    Then I read about the first dozen comments over there and realized my mind was fairly clean by comparison.

    D

  116. 116.

    Chad N Freude

    January 18, 2010 at 4:29 pm

    @asiangrrlMN: Actually, it sort of permeates all BJ threads.

    @asiangrrlMN: Betcha can’t.

  117. 117.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    @Chad N Freude: Can so! Watch me.

  118. 118.

    Bill H

    January 18, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    Tunch is a cat; of course he’s faking it for food.

    I’ve had several surgeries and never got hooked on pain pills. Which is wierd, since I was/am definitely addicted to alcohol (sober 28 years) and to cigarettes (off for 25 years). I cannot imagine why I dodged the pain pill thing, because from what I’ve seen that one is worse than the two that I’ve done.

    Best of good fortune, John, I hope it all goes routinely for you. Follow the doctor’s orders assiduously.

  119. 119.

    Chad N Freude

    January 18, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    @Demo Woman:

    just digging a deeper hole here

    It just keeps getting better. Don’t stop now.

  120. 120.

    Bill H

    January 18, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    @Mnemosyne: Oog dentist.

    I have a cardiac arrythmia. The novocain wasn’t working one time because the bloodstream was carrying it away, so the dentist gave me another shot and put some adrenalin in it to constrict the blood vessels and keep it in place. It went to my heart, shot my heart rate up to about a highly irregular 150 and caused a panic reaction to boot. I had no idea what was going on, and pretty soon the dentist caught my panic. He thought I was going to die or something.

    My chart now has a huge note on it not to use adrenalin.

  121. 121.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    @Bill H: My guess is that it’s just personal chemistry and make-up. I can smoke/drink on occasion and not be addicted to it at all. I have a hunch that I could get addicted to painkillers if I let myself. Physical vs. mental escape, maybe?

    @Bill H: Shit. Just, shit.

    At any rate, Cole, I hope you’re napping.

  122. 122.

    Max

    January 18, 2010 at 4:38 pm

    @RedKitten: My dog is the perfect balance. He will hike the trails and camp with me for as long as I want, but is very chill @ home.

    I bring him to work, a public office setting, and he lays around and greets all the visitors by laying his head on their lap.

    Wheaten’s are the “golden retrievors” of terriers, as far as I can tell. they will jump straight up in the air when you come home, Max is very excited to see me at night, but aside from the regular puppy-stuff, they seem to be very un-terrier. He is 4 years old, and I took him to a lot of classes to get the alpha thing established.

    Max is very solidly built, they are sturdy dogs. Originally, Irish farm dogs. He’s on the big end, about knee high and 45 lbs.

    They don’t bark, except when alerting you, and they don’t shed. That is major.

    Most are good with kids and other dogs, and cats if they grow up with them, but mine does not like cats. Which is funny because he loves small dogs.

    If you want a terrier, Wheaten’s are the one to get. Do not get a Jack Russell (sorry John)

    Obligatory photos attached here.

  123. 123.

    suzanne

    January 18, 2010 at 4:39 pm

    Hang in there, John. Remember, there’s no prizes for being a martyr. Not even virgins.

    Better living through chemistry.

  124. 124.

    HRA

    January 18, 2010 at 4:41 pm

    John, I wish you the best of luck for your surgery.

  125. 125.

    RedKitten

    January 18, 2010 at 4:43 pm

    @Max: Max sounds like the perfect pooch. :) We’re used to Airedales, who are also more of a sedate terrier, so I don’t think I’d enjoy one of the more high-strung breeds.

  126. 126.

    General Winfield Stuck

    January 18, 2010 at 4:44 pm

    and shredded the glenoid.

    Gourmet Cat Food

  127. 127.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 4:46 pm

    @Max: Max is very handsome! Except, he doesn’t seem very happy with the reindeer antlers. Did he get you back for that one?

  128. 128.

    HyperIon

    January 18, 2010 at 4:47 pm

    Wow. I had never heard of the glenoid until one of my colleagues did the same thing you did but while falling from a bike. He had a long recovery. Make sure you do your PT.

    I hope you have a good surgeon. This is a pretty specialized procedure, I gather. Have you ask the surgeon how many times he has done this procedure and when the last one was? Practice makes perfect.

  129. 129.

    Max

    January 18, 2010 at 4:48 pm

    @RedKitten: I highly recommend them, especially with kids.

    It brings tears to my eyes when I see how gentle Max is with little ones.

    @asiangrrlMN: He wasn’t my biggest fan that day.

  130. 130.

    arguingwithsignposts

    January 18, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    @asiangrrlMN: I saw what you did there, and we will all be witnesses.

  131. 131.

    goblue72

    January 18, 2010 at 4:55 pm

    @Notorious P.A.T.: Dear God man, I think I just lost all the blood in my brain.

    What are you trying to do, kill John or something?

  132. 132.

    asiangrrlMN

    January 18, 2010 at 4:55 pm

    @arguingwithsignposts: I thought you would catch it. Heh.

    @Max: Yeah, I’m guessing not. So handsome, though.

  133. 133.

    gwangung

    January 18, 2010 at 5:04 pm

    @goblue72: If John’s procedure needs blood to be diverted from the shoulder area, that’ll do just fine….

  134. 134.

    Mnemosyne

    January 18, 2010 at 5:08 pm

    @Max:

    We just started getting our share of it down here in So Cal last night. Thanks a lot. Now I not only get to spend my day off trudging up and down the stairs to get to our building’s laundry room, I get to do it holding an umbrella.

  135. 135.

    KDP

    January 18, 2010 at 5:18 pm

    I wish you a safe and effective surgery, and a problem-free recovery. I’d suggest a speedy recovery, but it appears that is not in the cards with the injury you sustained. So, I’ll just hope that you are able to recovery without additional problem or injury.

  136. 136.

    AhabTRuler

    January 18, 2010 at 5:21 pm

    because from what I’ve seen that one is worse than the two that I’ve done.

    Congratulations on staying alcohol and tobacco free, but no, the long term health effects of alcohol and tobacco are much worse than what opiates will do to you. Now, the externalities of being a drug addict in our society make alcohol and tobacco a more socially acceptable addiction, but long term use of opiates is not inherently harmful.

    ETA: Did any one catch this article: Morphine May Block PTSD After Serious Injuries

  137. 137.

    Shell

    January 18, 2010 at 5:32 pm

    Jesus, all these dental horror stories. I was very lucky with my wisdom teeth. Regular dentist told me they were breaking down, should see a dental surgeon and have ’em out before they got too problematic. 10 minutes of general anesthesia, out they popped. Didn’t even need to resort to the back-up ice cream waiting at home.

  138. 138.

    SiubhanDuinne

    January 18, 2010 at 5:40 pm

    For your consideration:

    Glenoid: (1) An obedient, robotic follower of Glenn Beck. (2) Any of Glenzilla’s muscles.

  139. 139.

    SiubhanDuinne

    January 18, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    @arguingwithsignposts: Is “shredding the glenoid” the Balloon Juice version of “hiking the Appalachian Trail”?

    /experiments/

    “Sorry, can’t see you this weekend. I’ll be shredding the ol’ glenoid, if you catch my drift.”

    “That guy is HAWT! I’d wouldn’t mind shredding his glenoid for a while.”

    “Hi there! If you’re like most of us, your glenoid has gone unshredded for longer than you might like to admit. Well, I’ve got good news for YOU! If you call by midnight tonight, The Professional Glenoid Shredders will come to your home and take care of this nagging problem for you! No need to run out and buy those expensive glenoid shredders in the stores, where they can cost $100, $200, even $500. For the low low price of just four payments of $19.95, we will shred your glenoid quietly and discreetly, in the privacy of your own home. Call 1-800-G-L-E-N-O-I-D now or visit our website, http://www.proglenshred.com. Don’t let one more day go by without having your glenoid shredded by the professionals. You won’t regret it!”

  140. 140.

    Tax Analyst

    January 18, 2010 at 5:59 pm

    @#17 geg6:

    Just quit taking the crazy pain pills, John. Like you, I can’t take anything like Percocet or stuff like that. When they had to break my jaw to get my wisdom teeth out, I took the Perc for exactly one day. I then called my oral surgeon and insisted on something that didn’t lower my IQ a hundred points. I did just fine on 600mg Motrin.

    Ouch! I remember having a wisdom tooth removed back about 35 years ago. Had my dentist do it, but after a bit I could tell things weren’t going too well. First hint was all the vicious yanking and struggling. 2nd hint was the sweat dripping down his face and panicked expression. It was taking quite a while, so I stopped him to ask if the novocaine might wear off while he was torturing me. Then he explained that the tooth was hooked underneath the jawbone and he couldn’t see that on the x-ray. He was going to have to break it down into pieces or something. I really didn’t know WTF to say, so I let him go forward. I couldn’t leave with it like that. I was seriously hurting for about a week or so, even with the pain meds, but at least he didn’t break my jaw.

    I got a different dentist after that episode, though, but they all freak me out.

  141. 141.

    Chad N Freude

    January 18, 2010 at 6:04 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: OK, that’s good.

  142. 142.

    Admiral_Komack

    January 18, 2010 at 6:07 pm

    I’m sorry to hear of your injury, and hope you feel better soon.
    Two things:
    1) DO YOUR REHABILITATION!
    Don’t shortchange yourself.
    Ask your doctor what will happen if you don’t do your rehabilitation, if you need motivation.
    2) Check with your doctor to see if you can take Tylenol 30 minutes before your rehabilitation session; it helps with the pain.

    Good Luck.

  143. 143.

    Tax Analyst

    January 18, 2010 at 6:11 pm

    PS to my #140 post: I was told by many folks afterwards that the wise thing to do with impacted wisdom teeth is to have an Oral Surgeon do the removal procedure. Probably good advice, albeit a bit late in my case.

  144. 144.

    WereBear

    January 18, 2010 at 6:26 pm

    I got a dentist who worried out the bottom two without too much damage, but it was an ordeal for both of us.

    Good luck, John. Recovery is annoying, but the fact that it’s possible is a lighthearted thing.

  145. 145.

    JGP

    January 18, 2010 at 7:05 pm

    Good luck John,

    As a retired trainer of professional athletes, I cannot stress enough that the rehab is at least as important as the surgery. Don’t dog it or you’ll be paying for your lack of effort for a very long time.

  146. 146.

    The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge

    January 18, 2010 at 9:25 pm

    I’ve been taking a vacation from the blogosphere for a while—personal problems, work problems, computer problems, yada, yada. So I missed your injury. My sympathies!

    I haven’t had my annual spring slip-and-fall-and-sprained ankle on the rain-soaked cherry blossoms out back yet, but I will.

    I’ve finally learned to just flop—what is this reflex that makes us want to catch ourselves on the most fragile bones in our bodies instead of just sprawling on our asses, and how has it not been selected out of the gene pool by now?

  147. 147.

    gelfling545

    January 19, 2010 at 9:19 am

    Just FYI: Some dogs will try to be PC or diplomatic. Cats NEVER fake anything.

  148. 148.

    Lex

    January 19, 2010 at 3:21 pm

    Tunch might be faking it for food

    Tunch ain’t faking anything. He’s just waiting for you to be still enough long enough for him to be able to use his sandpaper tongue to dislodge edible flesh from your bones. Cats are like Republicans in that way, except they usually wait longer.

  149. 149.

    Lex

    January 19, 2010 at 3:25 pm

    @mr. whipple:

    stuff like that doesn’t seem to lesson the pain for me as much as not give a fuck about it.

    Actually, that’s precisely how opioids work.

  150. 150.

    Lex

    January 19, 2010 at 3:43 pm

    JC: I’ve slept in the same La-Z-Boy, so to speak. You have my deepest sympathies.

    DO YOUR P.T. Cannot overemphasize this. It will suck, but you can and should take some of the edge off by taking 800mg ibuprofen 30-40 minutes before beginning your P.T.

    Good luck.

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