Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Let me file that under fuck it.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

I desperately hope that, yet again, I am wrong.

Bad people in a position to do bad things will do bad things because they are bad people. End of story.

Everybody saw this coming.

If you are still in the gop, you are either an extremist yourself, or in bed with those who are.

An unpunished coup is a training exercise.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

The fundamental promise of conservatism all over the world is a return to an idealized past that never existed.

The new republican ‘Pastor’ of the House is an odious authoritarian little creep.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

Fear or fury? The choice is ours.

“I was told there would be no fact checking.”

They’re not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

One lie, alone, tears the fabric of reality.

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Nothing says ‘pro-life’ like letting children go hungry.

You can’t love your country only when you win.

In after Baud. Damn.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

The most dangerous place for a black man in America is in a white man’s imagination.

It looks like winning debates is a black job!

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

White supremacy is terrorism.

You are here: Home / Help a Brother Out

Help a Brother Out

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Long time blogger and friend of this blog, Gary Farber, is in real trouble and could use some help from his friends. Gary runs down his problems here, and this has been a longstanding problem for him, going on as long as I have known him.

If you could help him out, that would be great. There are hundreds of thousands of people in similar circumstances around the country, and it is a shame we can not help them all, as rich as this country is. But in this case, there is something you can do, it is quite painless, and you will be helping a good person out. And that is the only way things ever really get done- one person at a time.

Reader Interactions

43Comments

  1. 1.

    Gary Farber

    Thanks so much, John, and, of course, anyone else who helps out.

    I hope I can get my life stabilized again soon so that I can get back to blogging regularly again soon, as whatever small amount of payback, other than paying forward, that I might manage. I hope.

    Meanwhile, thanks.

  3. 3.

    Jenn

    Gary, I’m so sorry to hear about the triple-whammy that’s overtaken you. I have several loved ones dealing with depression and/or panic attacks, and it’s heartbreaking, even when they don’t have anything near the rest of what life’s flinging at you. Sadly, there are no magic wands, however much we might want them, but I hope things start to improve soon. The best of wishes,

    Jenn

  5. 5.

    geg6

    Wow. I can’t do it today (money is extremely tight this week), but will on Friday.

    My brother is bipolar. So bad a case that we have had him involuntarily hospitalized twice. Thankfully, he’s a veteran and his treatment through the local VA has been very good. And it was helpful as hell having the VA back up his disability application. He’s somewhat stabilized now that he gets treatment and takes his meds and understands why he needs to do those things. But he’ll never be the big brother I grew up worshipping again.

    My sister, OTOH, has Crohn’s disease (a very severe case–she’s had over 50 surgeries over the years and has less than 2 feet of intestine left) and simply could no longer physically do her job as an x-ray tech about ten years ago. It took her over 6 years to finally get approved for disability. She had to send her 3 foot medical file from Cleveland Clinic to Social Security numerous times. Finally, her surgeon (Dr. Fazio, a world renowned expert on Crohn’s) actually called them and then numerous congress critters that he’d dealt with over the years and screamed at them to get her approved. She is now a stay-at-home mom, thankfully.

    Unbelievable how difficult it is to get disability, even with excellent records and a diagnosis that anyone with an ounce of sense can see.

  8. 8.

    Maude

    @Gary Farber: I am on SSD for physical reasons. I can’t send money, but I do indeed know what the process is like. It took twenty six months for me to get on and to be honest, it was the first time in my life that I thought that I wasn’t going to make it.
    When you are at appeal, a lawyer can help you and that helps a lot. Usually, after initial denial, reconsideration is a bust.
    They usually tell people that the condition is temporary.
    Keep coming here. The BJers are kind and they will help.
    I felt like a worm during that time and I had no support.
    You will make it. You have the sense to reach out for help.

  9. 9.

    WaterGirl

    A request from John is good enough for me. It’s not much, but I signed up for $5 a month, which I can do for a year. So sorry life is so hard.

  11. 11.

    rassia (amy)

    Done.

    What a body blow to face so many challenges at once. Good on you, Gary, for having the strength to reach out. Keep blogging and stay strong.

  12. 12.

    Zuzu's Petals

    Signing up, sending all best thoughts.

    And I second Maude’s point about getting a lawyer. There are ones who specialize in SSD appeals and will take the case on a contingency basis.

    Again, hang in there!

  14. 14.

    Chuck K.

    I signed up for at least a year — urge everyone to give what they can. If you’ve not read one of Gary’s trenchant posts or insightful comments, you’ve missed something. “Yes we can” gets local. Go give.

  15. 15.

    MysticalChick

    I think I got moderated but on the off chance I didn’t, as someone said on Gary’s blog, if John Cole says you’re a good guy, that’s good enough for me. I say DITTO and sent some cash.

    We’ve got to help each other out.

    Also, too: Please never apologize for sending what you can. There are those among us who can do more and they do with love. Give whatever you can and give it with love. Don’t denigrate your wonderful gift.

  16. 16.

    DPirate

    If I see him with a work for food sign I’ll hand him a buck. Kind of flabbergasts me to see beggars asking for $125 every fucking month, though.

    Actually, I think I’ll try this. Will blog for food?

  17. 17.

    Dee From Texas

    First, I subscribed for $5. The Internet is wide–it will hurt my heart if we can’t reach the amount that Gary needs.

    Second, I cannot imagine the horror of having to deal with all these problems without one human being to talk to about them. I’m sure Gary’s blogfriends will help, of course.

    But I would also suggest that Gary consider contacting a local church. I don’t know whether he’s religious and I’m not going to ask. I’m a Presbyterian and I think we’re a relatively non-judgmental group; there are also the Unitarians. Check out their websites and see what they say about themselves.

    We Christians are supposed to help, period. Sometimes it helps to talk, and there are people at most churches who are ready to listen.

    Man was not meant to be alone.

  18. 18.

    KDP

    I have known Gary for 25 years, from his SF fanzine days in Seattle. I am saddened to hear of his difficulties and I have set up a monthly subscription (and kicking myself for not having done it several months ago when we reconnected via the blog world). I hope things work out for him on the appeal as quickly as possible.

    @Maude: What you said. Gary, have you gone to an SSI attorney? At least talk to someone. You’ll have to stay on the attorney, but dealing with the system becomes the attorney’s problem.

  20. 20.

    Delia

    I can’t afford a donation myself, but certainly wish you the best of luck with this. I second the idea of contacting an attorney who specializes in these cases. I have a sister who suffers from a multiplicity of chronic illnesses. She only made it on the disability rolls after she hired an attorney.

  21. 21.

    Fitzwili

    I was able to donate a little- one of my oldest most beloved friends is bi-polar abd recently went through a crisis – He was so devastated.
    It broke my heart to see so adrift- I tried to help but it does make you feel helpless.
    On another note, I want to thank you JC for posting this- you have done similar things and I try to respond because I think there is something wonderful about randomly being able to do a small thing for someone you only know about through the computer- the world is very large but moments like this make it seem a little more approachable.

  22. 22.

    Miriam

    I’m not sure if the subscription worked or not. It looked a little like it was a straight transfer through PayPal.

    Keep the faith, Gary. I’m bipolar too – so I know where you are at.

    And thanks John for giving us the opportunity to help.

  24. 24.

    Catsy

    I know how much depression sucks, and what I’ve got doesn’t even come close to what you have to deal with, Gary.

    I signed up for a $25 subscription. We’ll revisit our budget next year and see how you’re doing.

  27. 27.

    metalgirl

    Subscribed for a monthly donation. I live in Cary, NC (near Raleigh) and wish I knew of some affordable housing available. I guess I can post to Gary’s blog to see if there are other local needs he might have (that maybe I could help with, who knows).

  28. 28.

    SIA

    @Maude: So sorry you didn’t have any support when you’re were struggling. But I’m glad you’re here now, where everyone (almost!) is so kind.

    You too AWS!

  35. 35.

    Svensker

    Didn’t know of Gary and his blog before this but after John helped out my friend MC, how could I say no? The power of the internet in action. Made a small monthly pledge and hope it helps, Gary.

    Have you got food stamps? Usually those are available even if everything else is shut out.

    All the best to you.

  36. 36.

    Karen

    @Gary

    As someone who is bipolar, I can totally identify. Add that with Rheumatoid Arthritis, I count my blessings that I’m working.

    You mentioned that you were in Raleigh, is that near anywhere you can be a guinea pig and get free drugs to test? I did that when sertaline (Zoloft) was about to go on the market and that was how I found out I had depression in the first place.

    Also, a lot of the drug companies were provide drugs on a sliding scale basis, or greatly reduced or even free, have you looked into that?

    I’ve got too many medical bills or I’d have gladly subscribed to your blog but hopefully, these suggestions will be helpful.

  37. 37.

    TrishB

    Gary, if you’re still reading, saw this earlier today on LGM and gave a little, hope it helps some. As someone who now realizes that she’s had clinical depression since she was a kid, I can relate to what you must be going through. It’s truly a nightmare.

  38. 38.

    Stan of the Sawgrass

    I’m there. It’s only 20 bucks (right now), but I’ll keep checking on you and see if I can do more if our finances improve.
    Really.
    I didn’t even finish your post telling us what’s wrong– it was almost like I was reading about myself, or my family. I’ve had chronic depression since puberty, and it seems to be inherited. No details right now, but there’s a lot of “southern gothic” scariness on my mother’s side of the family.
    Be well. All I can say is what’s helped me in my worst times: IT WILL NOT LAST. The feeling that “this is what it will always be like, tomorrow and forever” is a symptom of the disease.
    And– none of us are forgetting that you’ve always written one hell of a blog. We hope you get back on your “A” game soon.
    best regards from all the ‘juicers.

  39. 39.

    auntieeminaz

    Signed up for a small monthly subscription. Would have done more but I have had to pull my son back from the same abyss for a couple of years now.

  40. 40.

    RoonieRoo

    Done. I’m in for 5.

    Gary, I have lived with bipolar since my teen years. Every day I count my lucky stars for my family and husband who understand how I can cook, clean and function one day and be brought to my knees in depression by a simple piece of paperwork I need to mail. I am very fortunate to be surrounded by a family that put the love into understanding the disease.

    I hope that my small contribution helps as I have been the recipient of a network of folks picking me up in much the same way during those times in my life the disease was winning.

  41. 41.

    Tax Analyst

    Tried to make a donation over there, but PayPal was giving me some stupid crap when I tried to log-in. Going home now, I’ll try again tomorrow.

  42. 42.

    Gary Farber

    Thanks so much to all! For everything, and let me stress how much words of kind thought, and messages that people care, and so on, while not able to buy me a meal, do a lot to help me when I try to remember that I’m not alone, that I’ve contributed something to the universe with my writing over the past few decades, and otherwise help my spirits.

    I’d like to answer all the detailed questions, but it’s highly wearing; maybe tomorrow.

    And, yes, I’m trying to find a lawyer to advise me. I need plenty of knowledgeable advice. But I can also only cope with getting stuff done intermittently.

    Thanks all, again.

  43. 43.

    roshan

    @Gary Farber: Hi Gary just added something to your tip jar. Hope you get the help needed. Please don’t hesitate to ask for help. I couldn’t post my comment on your site so did it here.

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