Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

The republican speaker is a slippery little devil.

Giving up is unforgivable. ~Joe Biden

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

It’s pointless to bring up problems that can only be solved with a time machine.

We still have time to mess this up!

They love authoritarianism, but only when they get to be the authoritarians.

The media handbook says “controversial” is the most negative description that can be used for a Republican.

Everything is totally normal and fine!!!

Boeing: repeatedly making the case for high speed rail.

The fundamental promise of conservatism all over the world is a return to an idealized past that never existed.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

Republicans: slavery is when you own me. freedom is when I own you.

You cannot love your country only when you win.

There are some who say that there are too many strawmen arguments on this blog.

People are complicated. Love is not.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

Books are my comfort food!

Yeah, with this crowd one never knows.

A norm that restrains only one side really is not a norm – it’s a trap.

Everyone is in a bubble, but some bubbles model reality far better than others!

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Another Olympics Open Thread

Another Olympics Open Thread

by | 409 Comments

This post is in: 

I’m already bored, but I stepped all over DougJ’s, so here is a shiny one for you.

BTW, Jmart tweeted a bit ago: “Anyone recall who actually was caught for setting off that bomb at 96 summer olympics?”

It is, of course, Eric Rudolph, as anyone who follows politics will remember, but I also remember it because by uncle, who has lived in Atlanta for 30+ years and was living there at the time, is also named Eric Rudolph.

Every time there is one of these mass murders or shootings, it is one of the first things I think about- what kind of shitty luck would you have to have to spend your entire life introducing yourself as “a different Ted Bundy” or “but not that Dylan Kliebold?”

Reader Interactions

409Comments

  1. 1.

    LuciaMia

    Wasn’t there a Seinfeld episode where Elaine was dating someone with the same name as a notorious criminal?

  4. 4.

    Delia

    Is your uncle on the no-fly list? Or maybe that’s only for the sort of terrorist Church Lady is afraid of.

  5. 5.

    SiubhanDuinne

    Studip NBC. They promote the hell out of “Live Opening Ceremonies at 7:30” but of course that’s so they can do 90 minutes of running the luge fatality video over and over, doing (as someone said on the other thread) what amounts to a film strip on Canada (pretty scenery, though!), and give face time to Brokaw, Williams and Lauer. So I flipped over to MSNBC to watch Keith and got to see that awesome clip of Laurence O’Donnell from today’s Morning Joke.

    IOW, when I first asked for an Oly thread, hours ago, the 9:00 start time turned out to be right after all. Sheesh. I really hate NBC. They couldn’t just say “Olympics Preview and Random Bloviating at 7:30, actual Opening Ceremonies at 9:00”?

  6. 6.

    General Winfield Stuck

    That’s why I don’t complain having the same name as a famous comedian. People just start laughing and I join in, and that is that.

    And an obligatory pre fuck you to any enterprising trolls out there..

  7. 7.

    Mary aka Comrade Mary

    It has to be at least darkish locally for us to see the flaming spliff properly, so I didn’t expect it any earlier than 9 Eastern.

    The hot rumour all day is that the person doing the final lighting in the stadium could be Terry Fox’s Mum, although Wayne Gretzky is also top-listed. We saw Gretzky’s dad carrying the torch earlier on the route today, so it could be Wayne, but I suspect that we’ll see Mrs. Fox, Gretzky and some hologram of Terry all going up the stairs together.

  9. 9.

    QrazyQat

    Anyone remember which political party’s members/voters hid Eric Rudolph for years and supported him even after his trial? Which wing they’re in?

    Hint: Republicans. Right wing.

  10. 10.

    BarneyG2000

    The real tragedy was that Richard Jewel was a hero, but died as the guy most people remembered as the bomber. Just think about how his life should have turned-out.

  12. 12.

    BombIranForChrist

    I have a friend who looks exactly like Jeffrey Dahmer. The resemblance is uncanny, but I have never had the guts to ask him, “so, dude, hey, has anyone pointed out that you look exactly like Jeffrey Dahmer?” My friend doesn’t eat people, but he is really, really good at first person shooters, so who knows. Maybe he’s Dahmer’s good doppelganger.

  13. 13.

    DougL (frmrly: Conservatively Liberal)

    @mr. whipple:

    That was my first thought, what about the poor souls with the last name of Dahmer? The unspoken looks would be bad enough but you know that people that know them are going to be ribbing them endlessly about things like hey, whoya cooking on the barbecue?’

    I would bet that shit would wear thin real fast.

  15. 15.

    birthmarker

    I don’t know, but I think most people know Rudolph also bombed the B’ham abortion clinic, and ended up in jail there.

    EDIT THIS WAS IN RESPONSE TO COMMENT #9

  17. 17.

    General Winfield Stuck

    Great thread. Serial killers, terrorists, and the Olympics. Only on Balloon Juice.

  18. 18.

    Zach

    Of course, I wonder what political movement Rudolph would belong to if he were free today:

    Will you say that there is no reason to raise a hand against your own government, that such is forbidden by Romans 13. All governments everywhere including our own, have their roots in usurpation. Two hundred and twenty five years ago our ancestors overthrew their government because they were not being represented for purposes of taxation. Tell me you good patriots, is the caucus belli of “taxation without representation” more weighty than the deliberate murder of 50 million people? You lie, and your lies will find you out.
    __
    For many years I thought long and hard on these issues and then in 1996 I decided to act. In the summer of 1996, the world converged upon Atlanta for the Olympic Games. Under the protection and auspices of the regime in Washington millions of people came to celebrate the ideals of global socialism. Multinational corporations spent billions of dollars, and Washington organized an army of security to protect these best of all games. Even thought the conception and purpose of the so-called Olympic movement is to promote the values of global socialism, as perfectly expressed in the song “Imagine” by John Lennon, which was the theme of the 1996 Games even though the purpose of the Olympics is to promote these despicable ideals, the purpose of the attack on July 27 was to confound, anger and embarrass the Washington government in the eyes of the world for its abominable sanctioning of abortion on demand.

  20. 20.

    emrventures

    I remember seeing an episode of Oprah where she introduced a woman in the audience named “Dot Com.”

    A woman whose name of Dorothy Kahm – everyone called her “Dot” — had been a perfectly ordinary one through the first 50 or so years of her life.

    And then.

  21. 21.

    Brick Oven Bill

    BombIranForChrist;

    The Greeks teach us that through Physiognomy, we can predict a person’s behavior by their facial features.

    So it is very possible that your friend eats people.

  24. 24.

    scav

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    Great thread. Serial killers, terrorists, and the Olympics. Only on Balloon Juice.

    Usually sort of a cross between the intellectual bends and having mental jet lag but it is rather addictive.

  27. 27.

    BombIranForChrist

    @Brick Oven Bill: Well, I suppose if I had to be eaten by a human being, I would rather it be a friend than an enemy. I would hope he would keep me in something a little nicer than a vat, however. Perhaps a nice camping cooler, or a humidor.

  28. 28.

    Jim H.

    I know how it feels. My given name is James Jones, I went by Jim. I was in Junior High in 1978.

    I got really, really sick of Kool-Aid jokes.

  37. 37.

    Steeplejack

    @demo woman:

    Gretchen Bleiler, snowboarding. Won a silver medal last time in halfpipe, whatever that is. Sounds like an event from the High Times Dope Olympics back in the ’70s. That’s all I know.

  38. 38.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    You know what happens if anyone fucks up the opening ceremony? Our tiny, elegant Governor General will rip out your beating heart and eat it in front of you.

    I am not kidding. She’s done it before.

  41. 41.

    Xecky Gilchrist

    I had a buddy who had the same name as the then-reigning Mormon church president. Not a big deal anywhere but here in Utah, but he never heard the end of it.

  45. 45.

    dmsilev

    Conversation at work this afternoon: “There are too many Olympic sports. They should combine some”

    Suggestions included the gymnast-putt (shotputters tossing pixie-like gymnasts, points for distance, form, and of course sticking the landing) and skeet-jumping, a team sport which combines ski jumping and the biathlon…

    -dms

  51. 51.

    ericblair

    @mr. whipple: Why are there so few people in Canada? Is it the socialized abortions?

    If I interpret correctly from the tourism pr0n stock footage, they get eaten by bears. Either that or fall off mountains.

    And yes, Harper is an asshole.

    Oh, God, the forty-minute-long version of the anthem. Didn’t the Simpsons make fun of this?

  52. 52.

    demo woman

    Who are all these indians and why are they here? We need the christians. So far it’s been a pretty agnostic performance.

  53. 53.

    General Winfield Stuck

    @demo woman: I get a video loading error on CTV link, maybe it’s temporary and I’m not that big on opening ceremonies anyways. But can’t stand to watch the smarmy jackals on NBC. Thanks for trying:)

  54. 54.

    moja31

    i’m glad that hollywood wants to help haiti in any way possible, but recreating “we are the world” with every two bit celebrity is NOT the way to do it!

  55. 55.

    SiubhanDuinne

    I’m so glad the aboriginal people of Canada have such a prominent role in these Olympics. How cool to see and hear First Nations, Metis and Inuit dancing and singing together.

  57. 57.

    scav

    if it’s the winter ones, combining anything with the biathlon is mandatory. add more stops (curling + shot put, possibly on real ponds?) to what you’ve started (ski jumping and the biathlon) and we’ve got the skeetlechase.

  59. 59.

    Bob In Pacifica

    Here in Cali I have a friend whose dad is named Richard Allen Davis. No, not the guy on death row for murdering Polly Klaas, but the same name. At least Rudolph had his fans in certain circles. Davis, no one likes him.

  60. 60.

    freelancer

    Anyone else getting a sneaking suspicion that we’re going to be treated to one or more op-eds in the next week decrying the multi-culturalism on display, with a special tip o’ the hat toward socialist Canada’s acknowledgement of their Native Americans, at the Olympics?

  62. 62.

    JenJen

    JMart tweeted that? I’m kind of impressed.

    Gosh, I know there are a lot of haters out there, but I really do love the Parade of Nations.

  63. 63.

    DougL (frmrly: Conservatively Liberal)

    @dmsilev:

    How about the Cross Country-Bobsledding competition? The Curling-Ice Hockey competition? The Luge-Speed Skating competition? Snowboard-Ski Jumping?

    If they did something like this I might actually pay attention to the games for once.

  65. 65.

    demo woman

    Stuck if you are still around try the link again. The Bermuda outfits are great.
    @JenJen: The Parade of Nations is the reason for the Olympics.

  67. 67.

    RedKitten

    I’m so glad the aboriginal people of Canada have such a prominent role in these Olympics. How cool to see and hear First Nations, Metis and Inuit dancing and singing together.

    I was thinking the same thing — has there ever been a time in our history when they were all together in one room doing that?

  68. 68.

    dmsilev

    @DougL (frmrly: Conservatively Liberal): Well, we did speculate about ways to combine the bobsled and figure skating. Triple axels become *much* more interesting when there’s a 70 mph sled barreling towards the jumper.

    Curling and ice hockey has potential. Would really really suck to be the goalie, unless you allow the use of heavy steel plate armor.

    -dms

  72. 72.

    SiubhanDuinne

    I have a friend whose last name is Kirkey. We’ve teased him for years that his name combines two great Canadian sports.

  73. 73.

    ericblair

    Hoo boy, the top language on the country signs is French. There will be harrumphing in Alberta tonight. Shoulda used the official languages of Vancouver: English and Cantonese.

    Bermuda shorts are not flattering.

  74. 74.

    dmsilev

    The Finns appear to have shown up in their ice-cap camouflage outfits. Just in case they have to hide from some polar bears, I guess.

    -dms

  75. 75.

    freelancer

    I’m gonna paraphrase Brian Williams just a minute ago:

    [Re: the kid from the Cayman Islands] “He went to boarding school [on the east coast or NH] he is now an undergrad at Brown and currently trains in Aspen. Just wonderful to see a young man overcome such a situation and have it lead him here.”

    Yes, Brian, please, tell us more about the Dickensian nightmare of the Cayman Islands, and going to private schools abroad.

  76. 76.

    demo woman

    @JK: Sorry, can’t even become concerned about the article. My son was across the street from the Atlanta bombing. He was close enough that the ground shook and his drink fell off the table.
    The Olympics should be about the best athletes and honoring them whether or not you honor their country.
    I also remember the Munich massacre and the athletes need to be protected.

  79. 79.

    RedKitten

    I just realized that those First Nations dancers are going to be really, really tired by the time they get to the end of the parade of athletes.

    “Fuck you, Zimbabwe…I’m sitting DOWN!”

  80. 80.

    JK

    @demo woman:

    I also remember Munich and agree that all athletes and spectators must be protected. I just found the article interesting for the perspective it offered.

  81. 81.

    freelancer

    @Pigs & Spiders:

    He probably was being facetious, but still, this is the Olympics, and I know it must be really difficult to do color for the ceremonies, with your prepared texts and still try to come across as extemporaneous and off-the-cuff, but is it really the place for BJ-style snark?

  83. 83.

    Tax Analyst

    When Rick Adelman coached the Portland Trail Blazers many years back he had the same style mustache as Hitler’s and it made him look WAY too much like Der Fuhrer.

    My brother and I were talking about it and one of us said, “Isn’t that why guys have wives? To tell us, “Dear, that mustache makes you look like Adolf Hitler.”

  84. 84.

    JK

    @freelancer:

    Tool – n. see Williams, Brian

    One of the sadder things about Brian Williams is watching him on the Tonight Show or the Daily Show trying to prove how funny and cool he is.

  85. 85.

    demo woman

    This might sound kinda dorky but all the athletes are so attractive. Maybe it’s just their smile and vibrancy but anyway I’m jealous!!

    I must point out that I can type kinda and dorky and spell check approves those spellings but spell check still won’t recognize the President.

  87. 87.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Yay! John let me out of spammer’s jail!

    I really shouldn’t have pissed off Tunch in the other thread. John got him that FrontPage training years ago and lets him run the place on weekends. DO NOT TAUNT HAPPY FUN KITTEH.

  89. 89.

    mcd410x

    From Sullivan: “How Many Die For Lack Of Insurance? McArdle pours through the data in the latest Atlantic.”

    I’m willing to bet that she actually doesn’t.

  90. 90.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Oh, and I’ll repeat my earlier prediction: The hot rumour all day is that the person doing the final lighting of the cauldron in the stadium could be Terry Fox’s Mum, although Wayne Gretzky is also top-listed. We saw Gretzky’s dad carrying the torch earlier on the route today, so it could be Wayne, but I suspect that we’ll see Mrs. Fox, Gretzky and some hologram of Terry all going up the stairs together.

  91. 91.

    Tax Analyst

    When I first started doing taxes for H&R Block back in 1993 one of my first customers was “Richard Stroker”.

    I really wanted to ask him, “Can I call you ‘Dick?'”

    But I didn’t.

    But he was kind of a dick.

  92. 92.

    ericblair

    @freelancer: He probably was being facetious, but still, this is the Olympics, and I know it must be really difficult to do color for the ceremonies, with your prepared texts and still try to come across as extemporaneous and off-the-cuff, but is it really the place for BJ-style snark?

    Extemporaneous? Every one of these geniuses sound like they’re rattling off their fourth-grade geography homework that they copied from the encyclopedia. Sure, nobody’s going to believe you actually know what percentage of Iceland is covered in glaciers, but put some effort into it, people.

  93. 93.

    inkadu

    Watching “Undercover Boss,” under protest, with Mrs. Inkadu.

    The conceit of the show is that the CEO/President of a company goes undercover as a ground-level employee.

    It’s interesting on a few levels. First, the CEO’s seem completely shocked and surprised at what happens at that level. Second, it reminds me of the stories of the greek gods knocking on doors as poor travelers. Hosts were rewarded or punished depending on how they were treated. So far, the treatment of the President is fairly slavish. He comes down, much like a god, and dispenses raises and promotions. It makes me a little sick that this is what it takes to get promoted… it’s also a huge sop to capitalism. People who are cheerful at their minimum-wage jobs are held up as models. If shit-wage folks could just be happy! Seriously disturbing.

    Edit: Mrs. : “Every CEO should have to do this.” Me: “Every CEO should be limited to making 100x their lowest paid worker.”

  94. 94.

    Max

    Ho hum. Sitting in the Bay Area, just down the coast from Van and having to wait for the fucking tape delay!!!!

    Apparently, the universe revolves around the eastern time zone.

    In the meantime, Max the Wheaten got sauteed chicken livers with his dinner tonight. Early Valentine’s Day treat. He is madly in love with me right now. It will pass by morning, I’m sure.

    Note to self… sauteing chicken livers is gross.

  95. 95.

    demo woman

    @JK: I’ll read it again with an open mind. The first few paragraphs hit me the wrong way so I do need to look at it again. Thanks for sorta calling me on it.

    By the way sorta is okay with spell check.

  97. 97.

    mr. whipple

    From Sullivan: “How Many Die For Lack Of Insurance? McArdle pours through the data in the latest Atlantic.”

    Somehow I doubt her ‘data’ will be consistent with previous publications on this topic.

  99. 99.

    Peter J

    @demo woman:

    I must point out that I can type kinda and dorky and spell check approves those spellings but spell check still won’t recognize the President.

    It’s obvious that the spell check is a birther. (Another word that the spell check won’t recognize.)

  100. 100.

    freelancer

    @Pigs & Spiders:

    I stand corrected. It is Costas, I just haven’t heard his voice in two years.

    As an aside, if you have an idea, any idea, send it to 30 Rockefeller Center, VP of primetime programming, because after seeing the promo for “The Marriage Ref”, NBC is clearly out of them. [facepalm]

  101. 101.

    Tax Analyst

    @dmsilev:

    Conversation at work this afternoon: “There are too many Olympic sports. They should combine some”

    Suggestions included the gymnast-putt (shotputters tossing pixie-like gymnasts, points for distance, form, and of course sticking the landing) and skeet-jumping, a team sport which combines ski jumping and the biathlon

    Mixed pair Figure-skating/Tag-team Wrestling. Sequined outfits would be mandatory.

  102. 102.

    ericblair

    @Max: Apparently, the universe revolves around the eastern time zone.

    Why yes. Yes it does.

    I used to live in AZ, and meeting time emails always drove me nuts that way. Whenever somebody didn’t indicate the time zone, you knew it was Eastern and the person didn’t even consider the fact that, you know, there’s more than one of them things. Now I live in the Center of Teh Universe, and am super-nice about indicating time zones. Because I care, dammit.

    ericblair +2 and working on it

  103. 103.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    I’ve been trying to predict the next country in the parade. Once Peru showed up, I thought Portugal would be next. I literally forgot Poland. Wow, flashback.

  106. 106.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @ericblair: You’ve just described why I never *ever* watch things like the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade or the Tournament of Roses. I can’t bear the canned, scripted jokes and supposedly off-the-cuff factoids. For the Olympics I grit my teeth and put up with it because I do love seeing the athletes.

  108. 108.

    DougL (frmrly: Conservatively Liberal)

    @dmsilev:

    How about sending all of the bobsleds and speed skaters off at once? The results of that would be stellar!

    Curling and ice hockey has potential.

    As do curling and ski jumping (proper crowd positioning could add to the results), though combining Olympic skeet shooting and the ski jump has some potential.

  111. 111.

    madmommy

    The dancers off to the side of the athletes as the come down the ramp are running out of gas. And the women seem to be wearing skirts made of down comforters. Still not the sartorial statement that was made by Azerbaijan, though.

  113. 113.

    ericblair

    Sweden has “a very strong winter tradition”. You mean like having one every year. Who writes this stuff.

  116. 116.

    dmsilev

    Sucks to be Uzbekistan. Sandwiched between the US and Canada, they’re not going to be getting much attention.

    -dms

  119. 119.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    The mittens are already a huge fad here.

    Oh, I love Clara Hughes carrying our flag. Cycling in the summer, speed skating in the winter. I would kill for her thighs.

    That Hudson’s Bay blanket scarf? Awesome!

  120. 120.

    madmommy

    Loving the Canadian scarves and hats. But the moose hats the Americans are wearing are cool also. Sadly, I do not have a head for hats. Luckily it doesn’t get cold enough here for long enough to need one!

  122. 122.

    JK

    @freelancer:

    “The Marriage Ref” looks like pure, unadulterated GARBAGE. Jerry Seinfeld has dreamed up an epic fail. Between the Marriage Ref and the Jay Leno Show / Tonight Show fiasco, it’s clear that NBC doesn’t have a fucking clue when it comes to primetime programming.

  123. 123.

    ericblair

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse: That Hudson’s Bay blanket scarf? Awesome!

    Ooh, itchy. Beats the USA moosey hats by a mile, though.

    Harper could at least act like he’s excited about seeing his team, instead of looking like he just polished off a side of ribs and a sixpack and is going off for a nap.

  125. 125.

    Brick Oven Bill

    inkadu; I used to buy mozzarella at Sam’s Club. There, the last time it was possible to fix the Pizza Price Index, March of 2009, it cost $1.70 per pound in a five pound bag, which is pretty good. This was down nearly 50% from when the gas prices were high.

    Now I am buying cheese at a local bulk food store for around $2.40 a pound for a five-pound bag. But if you buy the one or two pound packages, it is very expensive. But still cheaper than those very bad frozen pizzas.

    I am very happy on the pizza front as I have decided to launch an on-line pizza-dough-kit mail-order enterprise. I am pleased with the name. This line of pizza-dough kits will be called:

    “The Chicago Way” (TM)

    Now I am off to go drinking.

  126. 126.

    NickM

    Amazing – “Pawlenty Says Obama Not a Socialist” is a legitimate headline. Think about how freakn crazy things had to get for that to be news.

  127. 127.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    I would like to apologize for Bryan and Nelly.

    Well, at least it’s not that dreadful new We Are The World. I caught a few moments of that auto-tuned abomination on NBC before I dived back to CTV.

  128. 128.

    gwangung

    Oh, I love Clara Hughes carrying our flag. Cycling in the summer, speed skating in the winter. I would kill for her thighs.

    I think I’m just content to worship. Or at least evince awe.

  129. 129.

    D-Chance.

    It is, of course, Eric Rudolph,

    It was purportedly Eric Rudolph. He gave a “confession” only after the death penalty for the abortion clinic bombings was taken off the table. Whether he actually did the Olympic Park job, or simply played patsy to save his life is speculative.

  130. 130.

    PurpleGirl

    In the other thread several people posted names of famous Canadians. I’ve thought of a few more, and people who I think would have been better singers than those two who were just on… Gordon Lightfoot, Sylvia Fricker and Ian Tyson. Joni Mitchell was named in the other thread.

  131. 131.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Comrade Mary: Yeah, that was pretty fuckin’ retar — er, I mean, that was bad.

    I need a k. d. lang fix to restore my faith in Canadian culture.

  133. 133.

    Max

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse: and Celine? You canucks owe us big time for unleashing that nightmare upon us here in the States.

    Funny story – I used to live in British Columbia. Far up north, near the Yukon border. And when I was in 7th grade (grade 7 to the Canadians), my teacher and I were continually at odds over the spelling of words like “color / colour” and the way to pronounce words like “advertisement”. I did not make a very good Canadian.

  134. 134.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    I think that’s Donald Sutherland. You know, Kiefer’s dad and Tommy’s son in law.

  136. 136.

    Oscar Leroy

    @LuciaMia:

    Wasn’t there a Seinfeld episode where Elaine was dating someone with the same name as a notorious criminal?

    There sure was. And then Newman revealed he had David Berkowitz’s old mailbag.

  137. 137.

    RoonieRoo

    And as usual when watching any Olympics on NBC, I just wish the idiots would STFU so I can enjoy the ceremony/show. It’s the constant talking talking talking of the morons about every little detail that just destroys it every single year.

  139. 139.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    @SiubhanDuinne: Yes, he’s sonorous like that.

    Could be worse: he could be pointing and shrieking.

    EDIT: OMG! It’s the world’s biggest gummi bear!

  140. 140.

    Grumpy Code Monkey

    DEAR GOD COSTAS, SHUT THE HELL UP FOR FIVE MINUTES ALREADY.

    Here’s the cultural part of the program that WE’RE GOING TO TALK OVER SO YOU CAN’T ACTUALLY ENJOY OR APPRECIATE IT.

    Fuck, I hate NBC.

  142. 142.

    ericblair

    @RoonieRoo: And as usual when watching any Olympics on NBC, I just wish the idiots would STFU so I can enjoy the ceremony/show.

    Yes, I’d just like to enjoy the Mandatory Incomprehensible Cultural Segment in peace. It’s not like it adds anything: yes, those are supposed to be whales: thanks for the tip.

  143. 143.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    @mr. whipple: On CTV, we were warned a few minutes ago that this was the part of the show where logic and the usual rules go away. You know, like Congress.

  144. 144.

    John O

    AL requested some more photos, and a story, the latter of which I just haven’t gotten around to yet.

    But you can see some here.

    (Note: Not sure of blog-whoring rules, and would be happy to send pics to a BJ host/ess.)

  147. 147.

    madmommy

    OK, I am a sap for this sort of thing, but this entire segment has been very cool. The visuals, the effects used, all very well done IMHO.

    And now for Sarah McLachlan.

  148. 148.

    Steeplejack

    @Max:

    Apparently the universe revolves around the Eastern time zone.

    I don’t think that’s the reason NBC is delaying it. I think it’s so that it will hit the sweet (advertising) spot of prime time on the West Coast. And not screw up the affiliates’ local news slots at 5:00-6:00 p.m.

  149. 149.

    Max

    Reading the tweets and posts here about the ceremony that I can’t see yet, it appears to be a little “obscure” in its references and theme.

    I’m prepared to watched the program remembering that smoking pot is the national pastime in Van.

  150. 150.

    freelancer

    @Carrie:

    I don’t know, the whole ice breaking/killer whale thing was really cool. I wonder if it looked that good live.

    Now, if only these people where painted up like Tobias Funke as a Blue Man understudy, we’d be watching Avatar: the Musical.

  153. 153.

    Mnemosyne

    @Pigs & Spiders:

    I don’t think it was Brian Williams, I’m pretty sure it was Bob Costas.

    Bob Costas gets tired of the Parade of Nations right around New Zealand, and then comes to the horrifying realization that he’s stuck there until the parade finally ends. That’s when he starts phoning it in. If you’re lucky, he stops sulking and starts making fun of what they gave him to read.

  157. 157.

    SiubhanDuinne

    I guess I’m an outlier here, but I really like this — all the orcas and salmon swimming upstream and Great Bears and such — the Aurora Borealis early on — I think they’re doing a very attractive program (well, except for Bryan and Nelly. And the whole NBC thing.)

  158. 158.

    mr. whipple

    I for one am glad to have Costas explain the significance of a violinist in a canoe.

    Otherwise I’d be thinking why is this dood playing the fiddle in a blue canoe?

  160. 160.

    hamletta

    skeet-jumping, a team sport which combines ski jumping and the biathlon…

    They did this already, back in the ’70s. Claudine Longet took home the gold.

    @PurpleGirl: The McGarrigle Sisters (RIP, Kate), Leonard Cohen, Raymond Massey, Walter Pidgeon.

  161. 161.

    Max

    Little known fact…

    The total population of Canada dropped significantly the day Barack Obama was sworn in as President.

    On that date, Americans could once again travel abroad without having to say they were Canadian.

    /jokes

  162. 162.

    freelancer

    @mr. whipple:

    Okay, earlier I would have disagreed with you, but you had me at blacklight canoe carrying fetish Ace Ventura with a fiddle. Followed by Mad Max pajama dude in an autumn folk hell.

    Is George Lucas the creative consultant for this?

  163. 163.

    Mnemosyne

    @inkadu: @freelancer: @JK:

    The funny part is, I distinctly remember seeing shows exactly like those on cable a few years ago. Mo Rocca hosted “Things I Hate About You,” where each couple had to name three things that bugged them about their spouse/partner. I can’t remember who would make the final determination about who was right, but it wasn’t Alec Baldwin.

    (And, excuse me, why the hell is anyone taking marriage advice from Alec Baldwin? That’s like getting navigation tips from Wrong-Way Corrigan.)

    There was also a show around the same time where the CEO of the company had to spend a week doing the jobs of the lowest-level employees, but that was actually pretty good. First of all, they were not anonymous. And there was no cash, prizes or promotions involved.

    You did get to see the head of Hilton Hotels try to make up a room. The standard is to do it in 10 minutes — it took him 45.

  164. 164.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Yay for hefty fiddlers with body art! We’re about to get a metric fuckton of them, too.

  165. 165.

    ellaesther

    @John O: It’s my impression that no one is all that worked up about it. I don’t pimp my own all the time, but I sometimes go on these (unintentional! I swear!) jags when I’m like: look, here’s a list of recommended reading on Israel/Palestine! and: look, here are some great Three Dog Night clips! and: look, baby Star Trek t-shirts! (Yes, all these and more can be found on my blog!)

    Now, it could be argued that I just used your post as an excuse to blog pimp. But as that wasn’t my intent, and I provided no actual links (other than the handy one always located in my handle!), I would say I’m innocent of wrong-doing.

    Also, and finally, any and all pictures of cute animals will be accepted and drooled over. These folks are not as tough as they say they are. (And that puppy is dang cute!)

  166. 166.

    Angela

    I really like this too, I liked how they showcased the athletes at the beginning and I like how they show a lot of class in most of this – good on you Canada.

  167. 167.

    Svensker

    @PurpleGirl:

    Ian and Sylvia were awesome. Their early stuff, with just the two pure voices and the guitars, so raw, so real. Just gorgeous. Plus, Ian was cutern a speckled pup, not that that has anything to do with anything.

  170. 170.

    ericblair

    Oh yes, they just mentioned Screech. Tastes like rum with some Chlorox mixed in and just a hit of Pledge to give it some oomph. I’ll drink it when I’ve already had quite enough to drink already.

    Still, not a bad segment. It’s making this expat Canuck a bit homesick.

  171. 171.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Beeb: Thanks for the HGTV tip. I’ll try to remember that next year.

    Say, is it too late for HGTV to bid for the rights to cover the 2010 Vancouver Olympics?

  172. 172.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Holy fuck. Now we get fiddlers AND more tapdancing. OK, this is cool.

  174. 174.

    Dave Ruddell

    There are too many people involved named Brian Williams (my fellow Canadians will know what I mean). Ours isn’t too much of a tool.

  175. 175.

    mr. whipple

    Is George Lucas the creative consultant for this?

    It’s like you gave some Broadway wanker $6,000,000 and an unlimited supply of acid, and said, ‘here, make your statement,’ and you got Riverdance with whales, a pink bear and a blue canoe.

  178. 178.

    freelancer

    This is madness, like a Girl Talk mashup of white culture, iconoclastic and traditional, gone way beyond the WTF boundary.

    “Madness? THIS. IS. CANADA!“

  182. 182.

    RoonieRoo

    @mr. whipple: He’s being good now. It was at the beginning when they were yammering on so you couldn’t hear what Donald was saying that made me worry they were going to yammer through the whole thing. Considering past experience of watching the Olympics on NBC, I was sure we were in for non-stop yammering but Costas has surprised me and been reasonable this time.

  187. 187.

    Ruckus

    OK I’ll bring it on.
    Page one
    Name has 7 letters, first and last. It sounds nothing like this but people have for years gotten it wrong. Trying to correct them only makes it worse. So the pronunciation of my name sometimes comes out – Ass.Hole.
    Second page
    Once took a passport type photo in a hurry. Didn’t comb my hair, hadn’t trimmed my beard in a while and wasn’t in the mood to smile (see page one). The photo was for work ID and for a year I looked like Charles Manson, minus only the swastika carved on the forehead. If I remember it was not that great a year.

  188. 188.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    They got W. O. Mitchell now. Bet we won’t see any gopher killing, though. But now some Joni (OK, a cover) for Laura.

    Interesting prairie reverse moonwalking there.

  190. 190.

    Mnemosyne

    It’s just getting started here on the West Coast. Any idea how long I have to wait before the actual opening ceremony starts? It’s 8:00 now.

    Oh, and I’m loving that Andre Braugher is the voice of the Olympics this year. If anyone can pull off the silly faux-drama that they demand, it’s him.

  191. 191.

    RedKitten

    Husband made me LOL awhile ago, when during the dance bit, four of the dancers were lifted to the skies, and he said, “Oh FUCK! It’s the rapture!”

    I was delighted to see Ashley. When they just showed those 6 fiddlers at first, I was thinking, “No Ashley? No Natalie? What the fuck?” But we got our Ashley, and playing “Devil in the Kitchen” no less.

    That definitely made up for Brian and Nelly. Plus it was just cool to see all the body art.

    Don’t know what the hell is going on now with floating dude, but it’s a little too quiet after the fiddle segment.

    And yes, it’d be nice if Stephen Harper could muster more than a polite, slightly dyspeptic grin.

  193. 193.

    asiangrrlMN

    I am watching on DVR. I love my DVR. Watching the opening right now. Might I say that We Are the World Part Deux was…an interesting mix? I woulda nixed the first kid, Celine Dion, and the flashback of MJ, but other than that, it was not bad.

    Did I mention that I love my DVR? Oh, and Brian Williams can DIAF for blaming the luger (obliquely) for his own death.

  196. 196.

    Max

    @Mnemosyne: From what I can tell, we’ve still got like 45 minutes of this montage.

    C’mon West Coasters! Let’s rise up and take over this thread from the East Coast Elites!

    P.S. Yes, I know, it was tape-delayed on the West Coast because of ad dollars.

  197. 197.

    ukko

    If you google my meatspace name the first hits are for a guy they were chasing on America’s Most Wanted. I found out about it at a job interview where they asked me if I knew or was related to the guy.

    Thankfully they caught the dude so hopefully his google page rank will start to go down…

    Funny thing is how close I cam to bumping into him and never knew about it, we lived 10 miles away from each other and I remember getting calls from a bill collector when I was in high school. I assume they were really after him, that is when I started to use my middle initial on all financial stuff.

  198. 198.

    ericblair

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse: They got W. O. Mitchell now. Bet we won’t see any gopher killing, though. But now some Joni (OK, a cover) for Laura.

    It’s definitely acid trip time now, with romanticizing the prairies and some guy spinning around in the air. It would have been a lot better if they started plugging some gophers. You could make it a whole audience participation thing.

  199. 199.

    SiubhanDuinne

    Say . . . Where the hell is Diana Krall? She’s a BC native and an iconic Canadian entertainer. Why isn’t she part of this?

  203. 203.

    RedKitten

    @madmommy:

    Definite Acadiana vibe. Plenty of south Louisiana musicians would fit right in with this without missing a beat. South Louisiana is a long way to travel from Canada under such trying conditions as they experienced.

    Yep. And yet many of us managed to come back, and are still thriving.

  204. 204.

    melissa

    I’m sitting here in Saskatoon with no intention of watching the Olympics, and this thread pushes me to tune in. What do I find?
    Wow! W.O.Mitchell & Joni Mitchell. Saskatchewan finally gets some respect.

  206. 206.

    ellaesther

    I’m not watching, because I am (and I’m just guessing here) a bad person, but reading this play by play is kind of surrealistically fabulous.

    I especially like Red Kitten’s husband’s comment.

  207. 207.

    Don K

    Bummer that the Canadian feed is on CTV this time. Here in Detroit CBC is a local station (and a local tradition), so it’s on cable, but no CTV. And I refuse to watch NBC’s coverage. I suffered enough through those in the past.

  209. 209.

    madmommy

    Anyone know if the aerialists are with Circ du Soleil? I was really hoping they would do something, but so far the stunts, while cool, just seem weak sauce compared to their usual artistry.

  210. 210.

    Comrade Luke

    @Yutsano:


    Here’s the reasoning    .

    Basically, it’s because the west coast is 20% of the population, and “that’s the way it’s always been done”.

    You’d think NBC would be able to preempt Law & Order: Bumblefucks on one of their 78 cable channels for the other 20%, but noooo. We get to find everything out through the internet.

    And of course I could watch on CBC, except…it’s being carried on CTV and Comcast doesn’t carry it.

  211. 211.

    scav

    @RedKitten:

    Our tiny, elegant Governor General will rip out your beating heart and eat it in front of you.

    yoikes, I missed that up-thread. Everyone worries about the Aztecs but it’s really our friendly neighbors to the north. Is it served with gravy and fries?

  215. 215.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    They sure are getting a lot of WTF out of a few sheets and some lights. I don’t ever expect Olympics opening or closing ceremonies to be purely good or bad, but if they make me swear or laugh, that’s cool.

    Wow. Molson guy has packed on a few pounds.

  217. 217.

    freelancer

    INT. WHITE HOUSE. NIGHT.

    President Obama enters residence area. The first lady is already in the room.

    BARACK
    Hey, Meesh, What are you watching?

    MICHELLE
    I’m…not quite sure. It’s pretty trippy, and I’m not sure what the point of it is.

    BARACK
    Yeah, thank fucking Allah, I decided to send Biden. Could you imagine trying to sit in the stands, cameras on is without looking puzzled?

    MICHELLE
    No doubt. You’re cool babe, but when you get tickled, you got no poker face.

    BARACK
    (Laughs) Yeah, remember the look on Pence’s face? (beat) Anyways, let me be clear. How are you watching this?

    MICHELLE
    Oh, I’m high as fuck right now. You want some? Frank Davis stopped by, said it wasn’t any big thing.

    BARACK
    Oh I love Frank. (beat) [sighs] Well, they’re starting the [finger quotes] “slam poetry of Canada” segment, so yeah, let’s fire it up. Love you, Meesh.

    MICHELLE
    Love you too, Bo.

    Card – “FIVE MINUTES LATER…”

    BARACK
    What the fuck is Penn Jillette doing in a beret? [gut laughing]

  218. 218.

    asiangrrlMN

    Those ice sculptures with the arms slowly rising are creeping me the fuck out, but I’m liking the greetings by the First Nation, the Inuit, and the Mati Nation (I know I spelled that wrong. Sorry!) people (yes, I’m commenting way behind. Deal).

  219. 219.

    RoonieRoo

    Okay, that poetry dude was way cooler than I thought when they announced him. I really liked that part!

  221. 221.

    amorphous

    Do Canadians think of their Pacific Southwest citizens the same way we think of Pacific Northwest Americans? I.e., are Vancouverites (Vancouverans?) the DFHes of Canada, like our Seattle…ites(?) and Portlanders?

  222. 222.

    SiubhanDuinne

    This monologue bears an unsettling resemblance to “The Rant” in that Labatt’s (or was it Molson’s?) commercial a few years ago.

  223. 223.

    madmommy

    @RedKitten:

    It’s really a small world, isn’t it?

    Your Governor General surprised me. I foolishly assumed that the PM was the head of the government. But I found out differently this evening. Like so many Americans I am woefully ignorant about our neighbors to the north. Perhaps these games will help inform those who have misconceptions about what Canada is.

  225. 225.

    ericblair

    Yay Canada, we say zed instead of zee!

    Pro-tip: say zed in Florida and the hotel guy understands you: say it in New York State and they have no idea what you’re talking about. Montreal weather reports (at least used to) give you the whole weather forecast down the I-95 during the winter. That and the St Huberts in Florida with parking lots full of Quebec license plates.

  226. 226.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Molson’s “I am Canadian”, right? (Linked to above).

    I’m heartsick and ashamed about the luger’s death. Nice that they’re acknowledging it, but the bad design of the track that so many great lugers complained about for so long, and the probability that limited practice times for non-Canadians made this accident and possible others more likely to happen, is a disgrace.

  227. 227.

    John O

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    Indeed I am.

    There’s been a lot of “guess that breed,” but the only thing we know for sure is all 5 sibs looked quite a bit different, and momma had some spaniel small s in her.

    But it’s really true that if you’re a certain kind of people, they’re your children, then your pals. That man’s best friend thing is no shit.

  228. 228.

    Mike in NC

    Oh yes, they just mentioned Screech.

    Love Screech. Was introduced to it years ago in Halifax, Nova Scotia, one of the nicest cities on this planet. You can buy it now in NH. Love California and one day want to see Seattle and Vancouver. Aside from that, the Games are a frickin’ BORE!

  229. 229.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @madmommy: Actually you were right the first time. The PM is the head of government. The Queen (represented by the Governor General) is head of state.

  233. 233.

    RedKitten

    @Mike in NC:

    Love Screech. Was introduced to it years ago in Halifax, Nova Scotia, one of the nicest cities on this planet.

    Damn tooting. When were you in Halifax? I lived there for almost 10 years, and still miss it.

  234. 234.

    ericblair

    @madmommy: Your Governor General surprised me. I foolishly assumed that the PM was the head of the government.

    The PM is the Head of Government: the Queen is the Head of State, except that the Governor-General is pretty much the de facto Head of State. Remember: Head of State cuts ribbons on shopping centers; Head of Government actually runs the joint.

  235. 235.

    scav

    Just thought of it now, especially as we’ve now got multiple timelines of the Games going. This whole thing is like Glen Gould’s The Idea of North. How Meta.

  237. 237.

    Yutsano

    @RedKitten: You know, there are times when I regret being allergic to marijuana, especially being so close to some of the best stuff on the planet. Then I realize how draconian our drug laws are and my common sense takes over.

  239. 239.

    asiangrrlMN

    And now, Canada is in. Bryan Adams and Nelly Furtado? interesting. OK. Song blows. Fast-forward. Still sucks. Wow. Incredibly bad song.

    First Nations dancing! I like that.

    Ooooh, cute guy in white walking in fake snow.

    Ex-PERT-ly, Bob Costas? It’s EX-pert-ly.

  241. 241.

    madmommy

    @SiubhanDuinne: @ericblair:

    But the Governor General trumps the PM at times like these, when the Queen is unable to attend, right? Kind of surprised she is not there, or didn’t send a member of the royal family to represent. Though I thought I saw Princess Anne at one point, but she’s not up in the box with the PM and Governor General so maybe it wasn’t her. She’s all about the horsey events, so the Summer Games is more her speed.

  242. 242.

    RedKitten

    Yeah, enough with the dry speeches already. I want to find out who the final torch-bearer is so that I can go to bed, already. It’s 12:30, and SamKitten could wake up anytime between 5:30am and 7:30am.

  248. 248.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    No, that was a joke. Sorry!

    k.d. lang! OK, she may be one of the few people out there who could resurrect Hallelujah.

  249. 249.

    asiangrrlMN

    Ahem. Dear Bob Costas and Matt Lauer: It’s not a fucking sports event, so you don’t have to talk the whole fucking time. kthxbai.

    The visuals are amazing. I don’t need the audio to go with it. And, I can’t wait for kd lang. Love her!

  254. 254.

    SIA

    @John O: Now that is a handsome puppeh. And Dweezil – after F. Zappa Jr? Nice. BTW your blog looks interesting – have bookmarked it for future perusal.

  256. 256.

    moja31

    @mr. whipple: nah that’s the IOC president (whose french is excellent), this other guy is the head of the Canadian Olympic Committee or something. obviously he’s not french canadian.

  257. 257.

    ericblair

    @madmommy: But the Governor General trumps the PM at times like these, when the Queen is unable to attend, right? Kind of surprised she is not there, or didn’t send a member of the royal family to represent.

    Sort of: the Governor General has a lot of power in theory, but would cause a constitutional crisis if she actually exercised it. Since the devolution of power to Canada, the Governor General has royal prerogative for almost everything.

  258. 258.

    JK

    @asiangrrlMN:

    Brian Williams can DIAF for blaming the luger (obliquely) for his own death.

    I knew Brian Williams was a douchebag, but I didn’t fully realize the depths of his douchebaggery.

    Another famous Canadian – Sarah McLachlan

  262. 262.

    asiangrrlMN

    @JK: I am listening to her right now! Love love love her.

    To be fair to Williams, he probably didn’t write the piece, but still.

    @amorphous: Bwahahahahaha! That is the funny. Merci!

    Cannot wait for kd doing Hallelujah. Best cover of the song evah.

  265. 265.

    madmommy

    @ericblair:

    So confusing! Is there still a certain segment of the population that is agitating for sovereignty from the crown?

    KD Lang is an amazing talent, but that suit was just awful. Look into tailoring, it’s amazing what a few nips and tucks can do!

  267. 267.

    RedKitten

    k.d. and Ashley definitely made up for Brian and Nelly.

    YAYY! Romeo’s carrying the olympic flag! I’m so happy! I love that man. (And I’m so glad to see that he’s fully recovered from his broken back last winter.)

  268. 268.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Hmmph. Terry Fox’s mom is helping with the flag, which I guess means she won’t be lighting the cauldron. Bother. If it’s Gretzky, I’m OK with that, I guess.

    (Yay! Anne Murray! Oh — Romeo Dallaire, too!)

    EDIT: And Measha! Sucky song, but she can carry it.

  269. 269.

    Yutsano

    @Max: My coverage is so fucked up it’s not even funny. I tuned in a 7:30 expecting the spectacle and all I’ve seen is Brian Williams, Matt Lauer, and Bob Costas endlessly yapping. If it don’t show up by 9 I’m gonna say fuck it all.

    BTW, I’m gonna just admit it now: yes I would sleep with Bode Miller. You may mock me as you wish.

  273. 273.

    madmommy

    So, Fox’s mom is carrying the flag, which blows away earlier blog suppositions that she would carry in the torch. Still no sign of Gretzky or Celine, so either of them would still be a possibility. Please, FSM, if it comes down to those two, let it be the Great One!

  274. 274.

    ericblair

    @madmommy: So confusing! Is there still a certain segment of the population that is agitating for sovereignty from the crown?

    This has never really been an issue as far as mainstream politics has been concerned: maybe the NDP has agitated for it but nobody really minds the arrangement. There are the Bloc Quebecois separatists, but that’s a whole different ball of wax. As far as I remember, the Governor General hasn’t done anything particularly objectionable.

  279. 279.

    Max

    @Yutsano: Apollo was interviewed by Costas on the pregame show.

    I’m in Oakland and on the same time viewing as you. It’s supposed to really start by 9

  280. 280.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Dallaire is a class act all the way. I’m envious that you’ve met him, RedKitten.

  281. 281.

    Grumpy Code Monkey

    @asiangrrlMN:

    Ahem. Dear Bob Costas and Matt Lauer: It’s not a fucking sports event, so you don’t have to talk the whole fucking time. kthxbai.

    Sweetie, you’re in for a long night…

  283. 283.

    dmsilev

    @madmommy:

    So, Fox’s mom is carrying the flag, which blows away earlier blog suppositions that she would carry in the torch. Still no sign of Gretzky or Celine, so either of them would still be a possibility. Please, FSM, if it comes down to those two, let it be the Great One!

    I confess, I’ve never heard that as a nickname for Celine.

    (Sorry, couldn’t resist)

    -dms

  284. 284.

    Comrade Luke

    @amorphous: Yes, they do. And – it’s Seattleites.

    You know, it’s amazing that we have a reputation for being DFHs. Most of the DFH rep is due to the Capitol Hill area in Seattle, which is probably one of the bluest districts in the country. It’s small geographically though, and once you get outside the I-5 corridor (which is a HUGE chunk of the state) we’re cherry red.

    And all the techies around here are either Rs or glibertarians, at least the ones that came on board at the end of the tech boom in the late 90s.

    There’s actually some concern that we’re a borderline red state, but so far Seattle proper is keeping it blue.

  286. 286.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Red Kitten: I’ve also met General Dallaire, and I completely agree with you. He personifies goodness and decency. A very great human being.

  289. 289.

    amorphous

    This opening ceremony is embarrassingly bad. Very bland, very… dare I say, Canadian.

    @Comrade Luke: Same thing with Oregon, no? As a future Portland techie, lemme just say I only plan to become radically more liberal as I age and my child grows.

  290. 290.

    The Sheriff's A Ni-

    I’ll call my shot: Michael J. Fox.

    Just because you know the pop he’ll get simply for jogging across the floor.

  291. 291.

    Bad Horse's Filly

    Well I guess I have kd to look forward to. I hate tape delay! Wish I would have thought to DVR it like some smart people (asiangrrlMN I’m looking at you) and watched it tomorrow.

  292. 292.

    madmommy

    @ericblair:

    I knew I remembered hearing about certain members of the French speaking provinces agitating for a split, but it never seemed to come to anything. Is the situation in Canada similar to Australia-nominally a part of the Commonwealth but in fact all but autonomous?

    Who was the opera singer who did the Olympic Anthem? Amazing voice!!

  293. 293.

    Comrade Luke

    @asiangrrlMN: Yea, I couldn’t believe Williams alluded to lack of experience being the main cause of the accident. Hey, he’s a huge Rush Limbaugh fan, so I’m sure he’s all about the “personal responsibility” stuff.

    I don’t really blame them for having the posts there btw. The bigger issue is how someone would be able to leave the track at all. No amount of padding would have helped in that case.

    I don’t think they needed to show the video at all, but I think that level of decency would be too much to hope for from the media.

  295. 295.

    Yutsano

    @RedKitten: What a stunning picture of the three of you! I would highly suggest no one ever cross you, fire red hair usually comes with certain, umm, attributes.

  297. 297.

    Yutsano

    @madmommy: Canada from what I understand (and I’m sure I’ll get corrected on this) isn’t in the Commonwealth like Australia and New Zealand are, however they are considered part of the Dominion of Great Britain and therefore still subject to the English crown. It escapes me now if Australia has a Governor General, I’ll do teh Google and find out.

  298. 298.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Nancy Green? Now I feel old. I also want a Mars Bar.

    EDIT: … and Gretzky is passing to …? I’m sorry, this still looks like a huge pot party with all those spliffs.

    Cauldron FAIL. Oh, God …

  301. 301.

    mr. whipple

    This opening ceremony is embarrassingly bad. Very bland, very… dare I say, Canadian.

    I took it the opposite way. Its worst elements were waaaay too American.

    KD showed you don’t need pink gumibears, blue canoes, whales and fairies on strings.

    Just a stage, simple lights, good lyrics and a quantum shitload of talent. Everything else is just special effects bullshit.

    Good night, all.

  304. 304.

    Comrade Luke

    Oh Christ. The ceremony doesn’t even start until 9pm? I’m gonna go delete the last hour of my DVR then.

  305. 305.

    freelancer

    @rootless_e:

    Thank you for that, my friend. I’ve been skipping through it, and so far the highlight is in the 15th minute.

    Oh, his tears taste like manna, Johnny Walker Blue, and a beautiful, loving woman’s kiss combined.

    Fucking awesome. I hope Stewart and Colbert don’t ignore this.

  308. 308.

    John O

    LOL…just stopped working and tuned into the Olympics maybe 20 minutes ago.

    The torch came in and I was trying to pull up some great Canadiens in my head and laughed at myself when all I could come up with was Gretzky, who is indeed great.

    It’s fail! Life is good!

  316. 316.

    Dave Ruddell

    Fucking bullshit, they copped out and had a group lighting? And they can’t even get all the damn cauldrons up! The prelims were bad enough, but that? That was fail. That makes me embarassed to be a Canadian.

  320. 320.

    General Winfield Stuck

    Sorry to bring politics into an Olympics thread, but if you want to get a clue why our media is screwed up and wingnuts get special treatment and dems called shrill that have the temerity to call them on their bullshit, here is a video from Morning Joe this morning.

    Marc Theisan, a former Bush speechwriter gets to come on teevee and hawk a book that claims in it’s title that Barack Obama ‘is inviting the next terrorist attack” on American soil, and when Larry O’donnell pins his ears back with his lies, O’donnell gets slammed by Moron Mika and Redneck Joe.

  322. 322.

    Comrade Luke

    This is going to be two weeks of Up Close and Personals about Lindsey Vonn, Apolo Ohno and Tanith Belben, interrupted only to show the events in which the US medals.

    I fucking hate our media.

    ETA: Seeing the sweeping shots of Canada in HD is breathtaking though…

  326. 326.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Oh, God, they’re cabbing Gretzky to the external cauldron.

    facepaw. facepaw to the max.

  328. 328.

    ericblair

    @Yutsano: Canada from what I understand (and I’m sure I’ll get corrected on this) isn’t in the Commonwealth like Australia and New Zealand are, however they are considered part of the Dominion of Great Britain and therefore still subject to the English crown. It escapes me now if Australia has a Governor General, I’ll do teh Google and find out.

    As far as I understand it, Oz and NZ are in the same constitutional boat as Canada. Canada became a separate country in 1867, and that’s about all the Canadian history you’ll get out of me since the rest of it was a bunch of stuff about portage and the Hudson’s Bay Company and was really, really boring. Really.

  329. 329.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Comrade Mary: What’s your credit card number? You just made me spit shiraz all over my BlackBerry and I need to order a new one that isn’t as sticky.

  332. 332.

    Dave Ruddell

    At this point, I just have to hope it’s some sort of elaborate prank.

    Also, Canada is part of the Commonwealth. We were once called the Dominion of Canada, although that’s not been the case for some years now. Dominion was used instead of Kingdom, because it was thought to be a bit premature for such a new country.

  335. 335.

    John O

    Dr. Biden, I judge, knows when and how to shut her hubby up.

    Just not good enough!

    (I like Joe. He’s a Kinsleyesque gaffe machine to me.)

  338. 338.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    @madmommy: OMG, he’s standing through the roof window thingie (it’s late, eh?) so there’s no poisoning.

    And there was a waiter, then a bunch of DFHs running beside the very slow vehicle waving their own giant spliffs. Man, you can’t make up this shit.

    (Apologies for damaged Blackberries, as well.)

    EDIT: No, it’s a pickup truck! With a very tall embarrassed looking guy waving a torch that weighs 1.6 kilos and is 1 metre in length. In a pickup truck that is going very slowly and blowing its horn.

  340. 340.

    John O

    Kudos to Chevy for the product placement!

    It’s all fun to me. Cab, schmab. It’s fine. It’s austere, it’s simple, it’s not Bejing, it’s fine.

    But it sure is funny to hear Costas and Co. tell us how grand it all really is.

  343. 343.

    freelancer

    Wow, FUCK NBC.

    Blagojevich? Really?

    Why not just put disgraced Congressman Tom Delay on a reali-

    Fuck.

    We are doomed. We are giving Nero his own episode of MTV Cribs, why not just put George W. on the next season of History Channel’s “Ax Men”?

  344. 344.

    John O

    Did anyone else NOT hear the S. White interview?

    Way to cut to commercial, everyone. Take some time to get it together.

    LOL…no, really guys, someone has to have an ad ready.

  345. 345.

    Yutsano

    @ericblair: Yep they are. I just always heard Canada called the Dominion, maybe that’s the formal name.

    BTW, just gonna say as on Ogala Sioux descendant from the Canadian plains, I’m now enjoying the aboriginal greetings immensely.

  346. 346.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Gretzky looks like he wants the earth to swallow him up.

    And now we have a shot of the blue-lit flaming cockfight back in the stadium. Sometimes I really love my goofy country.

  348. 348.

    amorphous

    @Comrade Luke: You know it’s going to be 10000000 times worse than you think now that NBC sees how badly they overpaid. The winter olympics are generally unwatchable. On NBC, they’re horrible.

  349. 349.

    Comrade Luke

    O Canada is one of my favorite national anthems. I can’t believe they managed to fuck it up.

    WHO WAS THAT WOMAN?!

  354. 354.

    Dave Ruddell

    WHO WAS THAT WOMAN?!

    She sings the ‘official’ CTV Olympics song. Nobody had ever heard of her before. Nobody will remember her after.

  357. 357.

    rootless_e

    @freelancer: The best part is when he speaks of Kyle’s mom being the anchor of her family and how Kyle was like that for Mitch, while weeping. Jeez. Weird does not begin to cover it.

  358. 358.

    Yutsano

    Just out of curiosity, was anyone else reminded of the entrances of Beauxbatons and Durmstrang when the aboriginal tribes came in?

  359. 359.

    Comrade Luke

    @amorphous: Did you see them interviewing Vonn in the room surrounded by lit candles?

    Just do the interview in a heart-shaped hot tub and get it over with already.

  360. 360.

    madmommy

    OK so the indoor cauldron was a bit Fortress of Solitude-y. But still overall it was pretty good. Except for the whole misguided Nelly Furtado/Bryan Adams thing. KD Lang more than made up for it, and Celine Dion was nowhere near the place. That’s gotta be good for something, amirite?

    I’m ready for the games to start-short track skating, snowboard-cross, downhill, curling and even figure skating! w00t!

  361. 361.

    Comrade Luke

    Is the broadcast over for those of you NBC deemed important enough to provide live coverage for? If so, did it go over? I want to know so my DVR doesn’t cut it off.

  362. 362.

    asiangrrlMN

    You know, the only thing that would have made that better would have been real candles and Leonard Cohen singing with kd.

    @Comrade Luke: I add a half hour to either end. Works for me. Usually. It’s done now.

    Gee! I wonder who will light the cauldron?

  363. 363.

    freelancer

    Every time there is one of these mass murders or shootings, it is one of the first things I think about- what kind of shitty luck would you have to have to spend your entire life introducing yourself as “a different Ted Bundy” or “but not that Dylan Kliebold?”

    I’m sorry to have to inform any of the lurkers here named “Amy Bishop“, that this is a phenomenon that will now be affecting you.

  366. 366.

    freelancer

    @asiangrrlMN:

    Not to bring the house down, but yeah, me too. Evidently, her husband may or may not have been involved. I feel much worse for the families that were affected by this, than the Georgian luge-er.

    To clarify, it sucks no matter who you are to lose those you love, but no parent has to assume there’s a deadly risk inherent in sending your kid to college. So yes, publicity for the kid from georgia, but genuine sympathy for the victims of random and senseless violence.

    @amorphous:

    She was denied tenure. So she murdered 3 people.

    Fucking retard.

  368. 368.

    asiangrrlMN

    @freelancer: I read that no student was harmed. Thank goodness. What a sad sad state of affairs. Reading a bit more, she wasn’t a good prof, and she was very loosely-wrapped. So fucking sad.

    @2th&nayle: That’s very funny!

    Ooh ooh, second lighting of the cauldron!

    Joe Biden. I like him. And, yeah, I think he’s sexy for some reason. Go ahead and mock me.

  370. 370.

    gypsy howell

    Thank you, Canadian Olympics, for NOT having Celine be part of the opening ceremonies. You get points for that.

  371. 371.

    freelancer

    @asiangrrlMN:

    I agree, it’s still nonsense.

    And I’m kind of remorseful I’ve brought it up, because, other than that, I’m kind of on fire tonight (at least, that’s how I’m perceiving it. Maybe I’m just being wicked annoying and I don’t know it, like most of the time.)

  373. 373.

    Comrade Luke

    Man, watching the Georgians walk in was tough.

    And thanks for blowing off Croatia due to commercial. NBC hates me!

  376. 376.

    Nellcote

    The Project Runway judges should do the color commentary for the March of the Atheletes. I’d forgotten how awful the axis-of-blather is during the Olympics.

  381. 381.

    Mnemosyne

    I suddenly remembered, “Hey! I have Tivo!” and started taping the ceremonies instead so I can watch them at my leisure tomorrow. I do love the trainwreck that Bob Costas becomes as the night wears on, so I’m not sure how much fastforwarding I’ll do.

    Oh, and freelancer, that boarding school comment was definitely heavy sarcasm from Mr. Costas. Which is one reason I do love him as a commentator.

  386. 386.

    Yutsano

    @asiangrrlMN: Yeah but it’s cute and sarcastic when you do it. For Bobby boy there…not so much.

    I will say this for the Parade of Nations: It was much more interesting when Beijing hosted, because you had NO idea which country were coming up next. It was kinda fun that it was random, at least by our perspective.

  387. 387.

    freelancer

    @amorphous:

    Don’t think you got where I was going there…

    It’s entirely possible. Before I go any further, for posterity:

    freelancer +6

    @Mnemosyne:

    Yeah, you need to hit fast forward on your DVR, as I got over that real quick. Costas was hit and miss all night, and some of it was pretty damned funny. The rest was funny in a very meta, MST3K fashion.

  390. 390.

    amorphous

    @freelancer: 10-4 on the half duzz. Not that I’m concerned when OMG SOMEONE ON THE INTERNET CALLED ME RETARDED, but I assumed the logical, unwritten conclusion to my comment would have been: Amy Bishop must be fucking insane.

  393. 393.

    Katie5

    (carried from prev thread)
    I’ve been watching the Olympics on CTV all day. The reason CTV showed the raw feed of the horrific accident was that it was “breaking news” and they didn’t think before they showed it. Now it’s “out there” in all its horror.

    I wish so much that the Olympics was still on CBC. But at least CTV stole CBC’s venerable Olympics reporter, Brian Williams (the other Brian Williams).

    No Leonard Cohen. But I prefer K.D. Lang’s version.

  394. 394.

    freelancer

    @asiangrrlMN:

    You would be correct. That was not aimed at amorphous. If you’re on this site, and not named Brick Oven Bill, Church Lady, or Michael Gass, then you’re most likely better than most strangers out there in the ether.

    It is Mrs. Bishop who is monumentally stupid, callous, and cowardly for her irrational actions earlier yesterday. She deserves nothing less than imprisonment for the rest of her days. In her rejection, she rebelled in a violent way that violated the rights of innocent people to live, and as a cost, our culture will reject her crimes completely and dish out its appropriate measure of justice, FSM willing.

  395. 395.

    Andrea

    Our tiny, elegant Governor General will rip out your beating heart and eat it in front of you.

    Can she do that to Harper?

    I’m with Comrade Luke and Max on the left coast (too. also.), sulking about the hour and a half of BS on tape delay.

  398. 398.

    freelancer

    @asiangrrlMN:

    What can I say?

    My friends will find no greater rhetorical ally, and my enemies will find no larger scorn. For those in the middle, I’m seeking empathy and understanding until I hit my personal wall that requires judgement one way or the other. You may count yourself amongst friendlies, FWIW.

    Also, given the international spirit of the games, it was just the slighted bit unnerving to see Taiwan represented as “Chinese Taipei”. That was fucked up. But what’s a manufacturing base torn between two superpowers to do?

  400. 400.

    asiangrrlMN

    @Katie5: So, it’s nearing the end for those on the West Coast?

    @freelancer: They have to introduce themselves that way. They always have. Soon, they will be re-absorbed by China, and it’ll be really really really sucky. I really liked your first paragraph, by the way, and I consider you the same.

  401. 401.

    freelancer

    I’m watching the Chuck Christmas episode from Season 2. Absolutely love the references to Nathan “Ned” Ryerson as the (initial?) bad guy, taken from Groundhog Day, and Reggie ValJohnson reprising his role from Die Hard as LAPD Sgt. Al Powell, complete with twinkie fetish. FTW.

  402. 402.

    DougL (frmrly: Conservatively Liberal)

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    When I read this:

    You just made me spit shiraz all over my BlackBerry…

    at first glance it seemed to read:

    You just made me shit spiraz all over my BlackBerry…

    It was one of those ‘Wha…?’ for a few seconds there.

  403. 403.

    Yutsano

    @asiangrrlMN: Really, their only real option there is to go the Hong Kong route and absorb it again but more or less let it run itself. It caused enough economic shockwaves when the lease in Hong Kong ended, they figured out really fast that they needed to let them be as independent as possible or the rest of the world would make the PRC pay in the pocketbook.

  406. 406.

    Darkrose

    The tape delay annoys me–but on the other hand, I’m getting to watch it on TV instead of trying to get the stream at work. And yeah, I’m a sucker for this kind of shit, but I think it’s pretty cool.

    However, if they do ever have it at Tahoe again and it’s on tape delay, I’ll be seriously annoyed.

  407. 407.

    freelancer

    Anne Laurie?

    What is it that isn’t sinking in about the late night OT being launched at 4-5-6am US time being ineffective?

    Seriously. 11pm-1am Central Standard. It’s not that deficil.

    Just sayin’.

    /Costas

  408. 408.

    asiangrrlMN

    @Yutsano: It’s still enough to make me cry. My father has worked for an independent Taiwan all his life. Now, in that same lifetime, he will most likely see Taiwan being reabsorbed by China.

    @amorphous: No worries! It happens on the ‘net.

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