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You are here: Home / In the wee small hours of the morning

In the wee small hours of the morning

by DougJ|  February 24, 20101:44 pm| 55 Comments

This post is in: General Stupidity, Good News For Conservatives, We Are All Mayans Now

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Breitbart’s off his meds (if he was ever on them):

Chez Pazienza woke up one morning earlier this month and found an email from Andrew Breitbart — Matt Drudge protege, founder of Breitbart.com and other right-wing news sites — waiting for him in his inbox. He was immediately suspicious of its authenticity; the email was riddled with typos, devoid of capitalization, and apparently mailed at 3:30 in the morning.

“I went and checked the email address to see if it was him, because my first thought was, ‘why the hell would he bother with me?’” he told me in a recent phone interview.

[….]

The 3:30 a.m. email bizarrely ended with a reference to the movie Footloose.

“It was weird, it caught me off guard,” Pazienza told me. “I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what Breitbart would want with me.”

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Reader Interactions

55Comments

  1. 1.

    Kryptik

    February 24, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    No surprise that comments end up taking Breitart’s side and saying he was forced into such tactics by those mean, bullying, evil anti-American liberals.

    I’d dismiss said comments if I wasn’t absolutely fucking sure that they weren’t indicative of what the common wisdom would be. Dammit, where’s my vodka, it’s time to drink the pain away.

  2. 2.

    The Populist

    February 24, 2010 at 1:53 pm

    I saw Bright Fart on Bill Maher awhile back. The man sat there like he didn’t want to be on the show and when he spoke it was the most arrogant, elitist tones I’ve ever heard.

    The guy is a complete a-hole. He thinks he is better than everybody and he’s just a friggin idiot.

  3. 3.

    Ash Can

    February 24, 2010 at 1:54 pm

    Maybe if there’s enough criticism of him in the blogosphere, Breitbart will spontaneously combust with righteous anger, and we won’t be bothered by his bullshit anymore.

  4. 4.

    R. McCormack

    February 24, 2010 at 1:55 pm

    Jump back!

  5. 5.

    daryljfontaine

    February 24, 2010 at 1:55 pm

    @The Populist: Sounds kind of like watching Fucker Carlson on Maher.

    @Ash Can: An apoplectic stroke would work just as well.

    D

  6. 6.

    Persia

    February 24, 2010 at 1:55 pm

    Everybody cut, everybody cut!

  7. 7.

    dmsilev

    February 24, 2010 at 1:56 pm

    I love this comment to that post:

    You beta males have had control of the conversation for too long.

    Isn’t the very definition of a beta male that they aren’t in control of whatever?

    -dms

  8. 8.

    freelancer

    February 24, 2010 at 1:56 pm

    Uhm, DougJ?

    Who is Chez Pazuzu?

    Never heard of the guy.

  9. 9.

    jenniebee

    February 24, 2010 at 1:57 pm

    I like it that Breitbart’s defense of O’Queef is that he might have made shit up, but that’s ok because that “fucks with liberal narratives” – once again, reality has a well known liberal bias.

  10. 10.

    freelancer

    February 24, 2010 at 2:00 pm

    @The Populist:

    @jenniebee:

    Breit Fart.

    O’Queefe.

    When did we start talking like Mark Levin?

    Step it up, people.

  11. 11.

    Bob L

    February 24, 2010 at 2:00 pm

    Kryptik @

    No surprise that comments end up taking Breitart’s side and saying he was forced into such tactics by those mean, bullying, evil anti-American liberals.

    The word “projection” come to mind.

    Fascinating that that the revelation of O’Keefe BS about Acorn is striking such a nerve. What happened to the “it was okay since he is a Republican” defense?

  12. 12.

    Kryptik

    February 24, 2010 at 2:00 pm

    @jenniebee:

    It kinda highlights the immaturity of it all, doesn’t it? It’s either ‘they did it first’ or ‘they hurt my feelings, so I want to hurt them back, even if they were right and I was wrong’. And yet somehow they get taken seriously while us folk are considered DFHs and wholly unserious.

    Really just no point in telling the truth these days, is there?

  13. 13.

    The Populist

    February 24, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    @daryljfontaine:

    Worse…Bright Fart has ZERO sense of humor and when he’d argue with a panelist or Bill himself his tone was so condescending. Tucker is a fucker (hehe) but he fakes empathy and pretends to have a soul much better IMHO.

  14. 14.

    DougJ

    February 24, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    @freelancer:

    Yes, I agree.

  15. 15.

    trollhattan

    February 24, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    Breitbart is certifiable, which gives him a long and prosporous future with today’s right wing. This TBogg title is the funniest thing I’ve ever read regarding him.

    http://tbogg.firedoglake.com/2010/02/23/andrew-breitbart-to-kill-george-soros-in-his-sleep-in-three-weeks/

    There will be more humor to come.

  16. 16.

    Bubblegum Tate

    February 24, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    @Kryptik:

    Really just no point in telling the truth these days, is there?

    In the realm of politics, the truth is absolutely meaningless.

  17. 17.

    Mark S.

    February 24, 2010 at 2:03 pm

    i’m sure you and the rest of the town elders will vote that he and his friends can’t dance. but i promise you the futre won’t be stopped by john lithgow & co this time.

    Cause your friends don’t dance and if they don’t dance
    Well they’re no friends of mine

  18. 18.

    Neutron Flux

    February 24, 2010 at 2:10 pm

    @Mark S.: Safety Dance!

  19. 19.

    Zifnab

    February 24, 2010 at 2:10 pm

    @Bubblegum Tate:

    In the realm of politics, the truth is absolutely meaningless.

    Well, right until the check comes due.

    I really do wish “This war is only going to cost us a billion, maybe two, tops” had been meaningless rather than the prelude to a $700 billion clusterfuck.

  20. 20.

    licensed to kill time

    February 24, 2010 at 2:14 pm

    @dmsilev:

    I love this comment to that post:
    __
    You beta males have had control of the conversation for too long.
    __
    Isn’t the very definition of a beta male that they aren’t in control of whatever?

    Perhaps the commenter meant beta males as in Siamese Fighting Fish:

    On average, males are more aggressive…. Siamese fighting fish will even respond aggressively to their own reflections in a mirror..

  21. 21.

    asiangrrlMN

    February 24, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    Oh, the schadenfreude is mighty tasty this afternoon. I hope the heat gets ratcheted WAY up on the fake pimp/playah ACORN tapes so that Breitbart ends up spontaneously combusting. I will have my marshmallows (on the tines of my rusty pitchfork) ready to roast over his charred remains.

  22. 22.

    Nellcote

    February 24, 2010 at 2:17 pm

    Breitbart’s off his meds

    Steroids or crack?

  23. 23.

    bemused

    February 24, 2010 at 2:19 pm

    This looks like the usual righwingers’ throwing & kicking stuff when others fail to recognize their brilliance & kneel before their magnificence, just dialed up several notches. Breitbart is in full blown freaking out panic mode cuz his great bamboozle got busted. He’s gotta scream at the top of his lungs trying to get people to look over there, not here.

  24. 24.

    kommrade reproductive vigor

    February 24, 2010 at 2:21 pm

    “I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what Breitbart would want with me.”

    Let’s see. He’s and uber-uptight fReichtard and you’re a guy.

    Hmm.

  25. 25.

    Ash Can

    February 24, 2010 at 2:22 pm

    @Nellcote: Antabuse.

  26. 26.

    Napoleon

    February 24, 2010 at 2:23 pm

    @Nellcote:

    Meth

  27. 27.

    Hob

    February 24, 2010 at 2:24 pm

    “Beta males”… hmmmmm… is that you, BOB?

  28. 28.

    Scott

    February 24, 2010 at 2:24 pm

    Breitbart and O’Keefe are a perfect match for each other — howling racists with no self-control. O’Keefe can’t stop himself from pulling illegal shit, and Breitbart’s rage issues (probably made even worse by what sounds like a tendency to over-indulge in various legal and illegal substances) are eventually going to land him in serious trouble. His final meltdown is probably going to be fantastically amusing.

  29. 29.

    Alex S.

    February 24, 2010 at 2:27 pm

    The whole conservative message machine has got fewer than 50 clever people at the very top. They probably meet every week or so and run a very tight operation. The rest is just pure unfiltered lunacy (the whole talk radio, the blogs, the local activists).

  30. 30.

    Tony J

    February 24, 2010 at 2:30 pm

    So… at some point in the next three weeks Breitbart is going to hold a dance in a warehouse, all the cool kids are going to come, and this will bring about the downfall of the ‘institutional left’?

    Does John Lithgow know that it’s on? Because it’s on. Eleventy.

  31. 31.

    asiangrrlMN

    February 24, 2010 at 2:32 pm

    @Tony J: Best laugh of the day thus far! Well done, sir!

  32. 32.

    The Populist

    February 24, 2010 at 2:33 pm

    @bemused:

    What do you expect from people who got zero attention in high school and either lived in the closet or couldn’t date the hot girl because they were the annoying little loner in the corner of the quad at lunch?

  33. 33.

    The Populist

    February 24, 2010 at 2:37 pm

    @Scott:

    I can assure you of this…if Breit Fart pulled the crap he did at the CPAC to Max B, I’d be using a lot of loaded words to get him to take a swing. Once he does I get to shout him down for 20 minutes and point out what a putz this guy is.

    I WELCOME a-holes like Breit Fart to get in my face (or a lot of the posters here for that matter) because he’d just lose. You can’t argue with smart people Andrew if they have all the facts. You think you win these things but the reality is you LOSE because your arguments aren’t even original OR well thought out.

  34. 34.

    kindness

    February 24, 2010 at 2:37 pm

    Bizarre early AM e-mails. Poorly spelled & grammatically incorrect. Raging anger & paranoia.

    Andrew sounds like he needs to put down the crack pipe.

  35. 35.

    Citizen_X

    February 24, 2010 at 2:40 pm

    Breitbart’s here to tell the world that the Angry Drunk demographic will not be denied!

  36. 36.

    Nellcote

    February 24, 2010 at 2:42 pm

    @Napoleon:

    Meth

    Yeah, that was the other choice. “Some say” his disturbing displays of roid-rage are intriguing however. also.

  37. 37.

    Ash Can

    February 24, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    You know, it occurs to me that maybe we’d better be careful here. If we pile on Breitbart here, he might get wind of it. Then John would end up getting a middle-of-the-night incoherent flame e-mail himself, which he’d undoubtedly copy and paste here for all of us to read and mock unmercifully and…well…um…

    HEY BRIGHTFART! Yeah, I’m talking to you, asshole! Hey, Big Loserwood, you’re a fucking amateur and your boy toy’s goin’ to the pen! Yeah, you heard me, O’Keefe’s going down, because he’s a pathetic bush-league wannabe just like you! Yeah, over here, dickwart!

  38. 38.

    bemused

    February 24, 2010 at 2:45 pm

    @The Populist:
    lol. I always wonder about their junior & senior high school years. They were probably the same people I remember who were obnoxious assholes then that no one could stand except the other obnoxious assholes. The type that fit in well with the Young Republicans.

  39. 39.

    The Populist

    February 24, 2010 at 2:46 pm

    @Ash Can:

    Yep Ash…that is my strategy. Breit Fart is nothing but a fucking moron pretending to be an intellectual. He thinks he has all the answers when in fact he’s just dumb. He’s another a-hole with zero concept of the damage he preaches with the claim they know what’s best for this country. In fact, the likes of Breit Fart have no idea what’s good for America. Scorched earth is all these idiots think about.

  40. 40.

    Molly

    February 24, 2010 at 2:47 pm

    Breitbart (and the Right), don’t dance, they bounce.

    “See I don’t dance, but I know how to bounce
    And um I wasn’t good with math, but I know how to count
    And um I knew of a bird, before I know the amount
    I don’t know a lot of shit, but I know how to bag up a ounce
    See I look good in a Ferrari, but look better in a Roadster
    I’m good with my hands, but even better with the toaster
    I’ve been bout stacking, was before I been rapping
    If the money right I go to Iraq, and bring back Bin Laden.”

  41. 41.

    The Populist

    February 24, 2010 at 2:57 pm

    @bemused:

    Good one. Did you catch the fight between Ryan Sorba and the gay republicans who booed him at the CPAC?

    Ryan Sorba was up on the podium being all smarmy, quoting some lame arguments about why gays are “evil” (and I love how he tells us that sex is only for procreation — explain then why Conservative males love fucking mistresses?) and he gets booed by a lot of the audience (surprise surprise).

    The fucker then threatens one of the GOPride guys in a very Breit Fart way (real scary Ryan…real scary I bet you showed them!) and then makes a quip about some lesbians at Smith College being better protesters than the GOPride guys.

    Keep it classy GOP!

  42. 42.

    Tony J

    February 24, 2010 at 3:03 pm

    @asiangrrlMN:

    Lithgow wouldn’t let it go down like last time. Breitbart ain’t no Kevin Bacon, no matter how much he pays his stylist. And does he have a Penn brother willing to lay down a freestyle when the going gets tough? I think he does not.

    Served. That’s just how it it’d be.

  43. 43.

    Comrade Kevin

    February 24, 2010 at 3:04 pm

    Where did this Breitbart guy come from, anyway?

  44. 44.

    bemused

    February 24, 2010 at 3:11 pm

    @The Populist:
    That was a shocking. When a neanderthal jackass is too offensive for CPACers…..

  45. 45.

    carlos the dwarf

    February 24, 2010 at 3:13 pm

    @Comrade Kevin:

    He was Arianna’s partner-in-crime at HuffPo before his conversion mental breakdown

  46. 46.

    mclaren

    February 24, 2010 at 3:18 pm

    And nowwwwwwwwwww… Bill Bennett and Rush Limbaugh are savagely criticizing Glenn Beck for not being right-wing enough.

    Oooohhhh… Once you bite through the crunchy crazy outside of the Republican party, you get into the chewy nougaty center of real insanity.

  47. 47.

    Tony J

    February 24, 2010 at 3:22 pm

    @Comrade Kevin: Chicago, apparently, where he first started dancing. Thinks he’s 6 steps away from dating the waify cello-playing girl that Leroy knocked up, you know, the one from Fame? Sister of that guy who played Beastmaster and saved the world from lizard people with the help of Michael Ironside? That guy. Seems he’s also got a big mad-on for John Lithgow.

    Breitbart does have a blog called ‘Big Hollywood’, so YMMV on how well that explains it all

  48. 48.

    gwangung

    February 24, 2010 at 3:24 pm

    @Ash Can: Well, then we should spell his name right. Given his demonstrated skills, ya can’t count on him googling his way here if we don’t spell it right…

  49. 49.

    Ash Can

    February 24, 2010 at 3:34 pm

    @gwangung: That is, of course, assuming he can spell it correctly on teh Google himself.

  50. 50.

    asiangrrlMN

    February 24, 2010 at 3:54 pm

    @Tony J: Well, considering that we are down one Penn brother…too soon? (Keep going, man. You are on fire).

    @Ash Can: Not when he’s wearing his blue Snuggie and drinking a glass of…beer? Man. That man is frightening.

  51. 51.

    SGEW

    February 24, 2010 at 3:56 pm

    Surely everyone remembers this classic from Sadly, No! circa 2009, right?

  52. 52.

    The Populist

    February 24, 2010 at 4:43 pm

    @mclaren:

    Further proof these fucks:

    A) DO not like free market ideas (aka Rush and Bill are only on Becktard because he gets more attention and good ratings – now I HATE Beck folks…just saying for arguments sake).

    B) They are status quo defenders. Beck is a loon, no question, but a loon that threatens to change their party. When Rush sees change he challenges it because he wants to protect his riches and that of his buddies. They are greedy a-holes.

  53. 53.

    SpotWeld

    February 24, 2010 at 5:40 pm

    So.. when Breitbart sends folks to a critical blog post via a bunch of @ replies…

    … is that a “twantrum”

  54. 54.

    chrome agnomen

    February 24, 2010 at 7:59 pm

    hey, if dougj won’t be civilized enough to share michael gass’ scanned documents with us, what makes you all think he’ll share breitbart’s misspelled emails?

  55. 55.

    DougJ

    February 24, 2010 at 10:07 pm

    @chrome agnomen:

    That made me laugh.

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