As I’ve mentioned before it seems that all of Jack Abramoff’s old scandal buddies are getting back into the game. Patrick Pizzella, Dick Armey, Matt Kibbe and others are running the Tea Bagger movement from their puppet master perches on K Street and the Avenues of power inside the DC beltway. JD Hayworth, Richard Pombo and others are running for office again.
Could Jack’s core cadre of grifters be far behind. Of course not.
The word has leaked out that Ralph Reed is getting ready to run for Congress in Georgia. Micheal Scherer at Time has more details.
Reed is a creation of Abramoff. Jack plucked the young plagiarist from Georgia decades ago and set him up in DC. The grifters have been working together ever since. Reed’s greed for payoffs became so intense that at one point Abramoff and fellow co-conspirator Micheal Scanlon were complaining about Ralph.
Jack told Mike:
And then there is that system of human trafficking, forced abortions and force prostitution in the Western Pacific that Ralph, Jack and the gang protected in exchange for cash. I hope the FSM gives these weasels what they deserve when their number comes up.
But things are what they are and so: yes, of course Reed will run for Congress. He’ll tell the rubes he is a “Christian” and the fools will support this grifter with an ice cream face. The only good thing one could say about Congressman Reed is that you could file an ethics complaint against him the moment he is sworn in.
Regardless of the drawbacks, I’m sure this is good news for John McCain.
Cheers
dengre
SIA
I knew I’d left one out of my list of politicians from Georgia the other night. Ralph Reed is one of the most notorious, slimy, evil little fellas out there. I’m holding out a hope that he’s played his last dirty card on the people here. Maybe even the Teabaggers can see through him now.
kdaug
My God. Even though it’s a “safe” seat, I can think of a half-dozen scandals that should permanently remove him from consideration.
I mean, c’mon – Indian casinos, child-labor and prostitution in the Marinaras Islands, let alone the Abramoff connections.
His election to any office would be proof positive that we are all doomed. It’d be like Tom Delay being anointed Pope.
You Don't Say
Do we know who Reed’s opponent will be? I am broke, but I’d scrounge up a few pennies to send his opponent’s way. There is probably no one I despise more than Ralph Reed.
tc125231
I can think of people I despise more than Ralph Reed –but I have to admit that there aren’t that many –not more than a few hundred.
Basically, he is a B Grade conscienceless grifter who would sell his sisters into white slavery for a nice set of wheels. The Grand Old Party is built on such putrid piles of dung. There are hundreds like him.
Kobie
I remember seeing him on the cover of Newsweek back when he was the religious right’s poster boy and something about him just looked … I dunno, scummy. Turns out my instincts were right.
asiangrrlMN
I had to Google Image him to see what he looked like. Now, I must poke my eyeballs out with my rusty pitchfork, dipped in hot lye.
Scummy, slimy, creepy, all of the above. He’s a shoe-in.
MikeJ
While the subject is of course he’s running, LGM points us to:
He certainly wouldn’t be the first goat blower in the senate.
Yutsano
I thought this assclown retreated under a rock after the massive fail that is the Christian Coalition fell apart. How in the hell did he even come close to reviving his reputation after being exposed for the grifter he is?
freelancer (itouch)
Mallet-Temple-(THUD)-Groan-WUT?-Advil
what the hell happened? Stuck’s braining technique is kind of a poor man’s Eternal sunshine memory erasing thing, but itt sems t werk okky. I coold use a drin.k
Yutsano
@freelancer (itouch): I think you need a second dosage. Here lemme help you.
Eljai
Christ, it’s like a horror movie where the monsters keep coming back to life. If there was anything to this karma thing, these creeps would be picking nits off each other in a prison cell somewhere.
freelancer (itouch)
@Yutsano:
Okay, got my bearings. Aww fuck. I’m in…Nebraska? Oh this is just disappointing all over the place. Why. The. Fuck. Am I wearing a shirt with a morbidly obese cat on it?! What have I been doing with what I call a life?! Hey, convenient that this mallet is here on my coffee table…
Yutsano
@freelancer (itouch): Put down the mallet and back away slowly. That’s it…nice and slow. And be more respectful of your Lord and Tunch please. The justice of the paw is swift and brutal.
asiangrrlMN
@freelancer (itouch): Ok. This made me snort out loud. I am wearing my OBEY sweatshirt as I type! The Tunchie, I tremble before him.
@Yutsano: No kidding. you will never hear me bad-mouth the Tunchinator (in part because I am besotted by him).
OK. I think we need to get one BJ commenter from every red district that has an open election to run. A concerted campaign, if you will. BJs Sweep the Nation! We must do it for the good of our country.
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN: Okay I admit it: I can’t handle this tonight. Hopefully FH # 1 figured out the dinner sitch and you’re comfy in your “OBEY” thong. Heh. I kinda like the sound of that. And I’m crashing before I say something really stupid.
asiangrrlMN
@Yutsano: Aw, poor Yutsy. Get some real sleep, and I’ll talk to you later. Not wearing the thong right now, but if it turns you on to imagine it, go for it!
freelancer (itouch)
@Yutsano:
@asiangrrlMN:
(Rebooted) “Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Tunch R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn”
SiubhanDuinne
I happen to live in the 7th congressional district of Georgia, so I take very seriously and fearfully the thought that Ralph Reed might end up as “my” Representative. Believe me, I will not only give $$ to his opponent but will work long, hard, and actively to keep that sleazy lttle scumbag from “representing” me. And seriously, if that fails? I would move out of the district.
Ash Can
@SiubhanDuinne: If Reed does run, some detailed, well-researched, Dengre-style letters to the editor(s) of your local newspaper(s) may be in order.
Brick Oven Bill
Denial is a defense mechanism Dennis G. The mathematics are still there, and will continue to be, as they are eternal.
SiubhanDuinne
@Ash Can: Yes indeed, at a minimum. But I’m also talking about door to door work, phonebanking and volunteering at campaign HQ for his opponent. Even in the primary — and I hope the GOP primary attracts a large number of candidates — whilei wouldn’t work actively *for* a Republican I would certainly work actively *against* RR and would vote for just about anybody running against him. The 7th district is so solidly Republican, unfortunately, that pretty much the primary winner has the seat locked up. So the next few months are going to be much more critical than the fall campaign.
But of course I’ll write LTTE too, and your suggestion of drawing on Dengre’s superb research is a great idea.
Ash Can
@SiubhanDuinne: Good for you. You’d be doing yourself and your congressional-district neighbors a favor by getting Reed’s story as much exposure as possible. People need to know who, and what, they’re voting for.
SiubhanDuinne
Oh BTW, Dengre: “grifter with an ice cream face”? Perfect!
A Mom Anon
Around my house,he’s always known as Ralph FUCKING Reed. I loathe that little weasel. GA politics is smarmy enough without that nasty piece of work in the mix. The thing about running a Dem down here is the second one gets traction of any kind,the GOP starts dumping a metric shit ton of money on the district and that’s the end of the Dem. Dems won’t spend a dime here unless the seat is a safe bet,they will not fight or put feets on the ground outside of Atlanta and Athens. Hopefully there’s a GOP challenger or two willing to do the oppo work and take the little shit down.
flukebucket
Reed will win easily in Georgia. A vote against Reed would be a vote against Jesus.
It is just how the voters down here think and there is not a damn thing that can be done about it.
Paul in KY
Ralph Reed makes that religious huckster character in ‘There Will be Blood’ look like Diogenes.
SiubhanDuinne
@flukebucket: Not sure about that. He was considered a shoo-in for LG in 2006, had a commanding lead in the polls for much of the campaign and was viewed nationally as an emerging GOP wunderkind — but Casey Cagle ended up primarying his ass 56-44. With a halfway decent (i.e. no live boys/dead girls) GOP candidate, Reed shouldn’t make it through the summer.
The Grand Panjandrum
If elected he’ll be somebody’s bitch in a federal pen before the end of the decade. That federal gravy train is just too tempting for him to be able to suppress his criminality.
SiubhanDuinne
@The Grand Panjandrm: Not sre I can wait until 2020.
The Grand Panjandrum
@asiangrrlMN:
You’ll get no argument from me. Nothing like a good …
mistersnrub
Any one else watch Big Love? This season features a very thinly-disguised version of Mr. Reed (the character has the same last name). He is in cahoots with a powerful DC lobbyist, scheming to bilk Indian tribes and Mormons out of their $, all while acting holier than thou. Oh, and he also plants a fake bomb at the Mormon/Indian casino as part of his astroturf evangelical protest.
This guy is lower than dirt.
BW Smith
@SiubhanDuinne: I live in this district as well. I never vote for republicans but I will vote against this smarmy, greedy SOB in the primary. I have watched his career closely since his days at UGA. He has always been a class A opportunist and criminal. I think republicans should recruit our Gwinnett DA. He has his drawbacks but at least he’s not this guy. I will happily join any of you at Ralph’s rallies and bring my “Why aren’t you in jail” signs.
raptusregaliter
@BW Smith:
I live in GA-6. The best vote I ever cast here was Casey Cagle for Lt. Guv just so I could ram it up Reed’s ass. This guy is an absolutely amoral sack of shit. He laughs at the Christian fundies behind their backs while simultaneously picking their pockets. He could easily win the seat; it’ll take a Repub with cash and name recognition to beat him.
raptusregaliter
Here’s a great cartoon from the local alternative weekly (Creative Loafing) that tells you all you need to know about Ralph:
http://atlanta.creativeloafing.com/gyrobase/Content?oid=oid%3A20871
flukebucket
@SiubhanDuinne:
‘ol Ralph will play the “not perfect, just forgiven” card and the rubes will love him for it. Maybe a tear or two. Perhaps a quivering lip.
I am already looking forward to it.
SenyorDave
I do think it will be pretty easy to put together some strong ads against Reed. He is not just an amoral sack of crap, he’s a DOCUMENTED amoral sack of crap.
Every ad against Reed should have Abramoff’s mug shot prominently displayed.
FPN
Ralph Reed’s scum enough to get a reference on “Big Love”. The “Fresh Face RON Reed” the swarmy/conservative/Religous nutbag was called. Awesome.
zoe kentucky in pittsburgh
Jeebus. Those are words I had never put together, Congressman Ralph Reed.
I just ralped my breakfast.
Georgians really can’t be that stupid, can they? Reed’s history isn’t exactly unknown, he’s one of the biggest charlatans around. I’d think a moderate dem with any kind of moxie and organization could take him out– the hard part would be what scandal to focus on first. There are some great emails where Reed spelled out exactly what he was doing, exposes himself as the greedy, twisted charlatan that he is. It’s not like Reed can redeem himself by having a come-to-Jesus moment, how much more Christian can you get as the former head of the Christian Coalition?
Reed leaves a slime trail wherever he goes. One would hope that this might be the year that most people might reject openly slick, slimy transparently corrupt politicians.
gene108
”
I thought this assclown retreated under a rock after the massive fail that is the Christian Coalition fell apart. How in the hell did he even come close to reviving his reputation after being exposed for the grifter he is?”
Ralph Reed is a Christian and Christians are forgiven of their sins or right-wing social conservatives will forgive him because he’s a self proclaimed Christian.
Just like they embraced George W. Bush because “W” said he’s a Christian. He didn’t do much that was particularly religious while in office, but it seems saying you are a Christian and want people to pray to Jesus in schools, at the courthouse and every where they can is quick way to get votes with some voters.
BW Smith
@zoe kentucky in pittsburgh: While there are some fundies in this district, there are a lot more fiscal conservatives. That’s why Linder and his stupid “fair tax” kept getting re-elected. He basically paid lip-service to the fundies when he had to. The most important thing to point out about Reed in this district is his fiscal irresponsibility. I seem to recall he was forced to resign from the Christian Coalition due to fiscal impropiety.
AJ
And, of course, he will win.
This is the same state that just replaced it’s Republican representative for fucking a lobbyist, with another Republican who fucks his mother-in-law!
Republican. Fambly. Valyoos.
Corner Stone
@raptusregaliter: Probably my all time non-movie quote:
Link to a different article about Reed.
Mike in NC
Get your bumper sticker now:
Sarah Palin + Ralph Reed = Rapture Ready in 2012!
celticdragonchick
@zoe kentucky in pittsburgh:
You will never go broke underestimating the mendacity and tribalism of fundamentalist voters in Georgia.
Trying to point out the sex slavery issue in Guam will likely be useless, since conservative Christians have been conditioned for 30 years to ignore anything for the ‘librul’ media.
Dr. Morpheus
@asiangrrlMN:
From asiangrrlMN’s lips…uh, wait a minute, let me rephrase that…
Susie Madrak
This is very exciting news, since it’s been a while since we’ve outed a closeted gay Republican hypocrite. I look forward to his “come to Jesus” moment!
asiangrrlMN
@Dr. Morpheus: Ha! I think you phrased it perfectly.
@The Grand Panjandrum: Didn’t think there would be much argument on that front.
@freelancer (itouch): Did you survive your encounter with the Tunchinator and his Paw of Doom?
lipreader
I don’t understand how one can look at Ralph Reed and not recoil from the sheer evil in his eyes. I think if you look close enough you can see Satan dancing around in there.
He’s got some secrets, you betcha!