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You are here: Home / Humorous / The Sarah Palin Network

The Sarah Palin Network

by John Cole|  April 11, 201010:57 am| 67 Comments

This post is in: Humorous

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Thanks to SIA, this SNL clip was just brutal (and awesome):

If John McCain had any honor, dignity, and shame, after watching that video he would grab her and take her with him to Dick Cheney’s undisclosed nation and hope the entire world would forget about them and the fact that he foisted her onto the national platform.

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67Comments

  1. 1.

    Skepticat

    April 11, 2010 at 10:59 am

    Sarah Palin herself does a devastating impression of a total twit, making Ms. Fey redundant. She has slipped totally into self-parody.

  2. 2.

    Violet

    April 11, 2010 at 11:01 am

    I loved the Teabagger Wheel of Fortune. Teabonics, bitches!

  3. 3.

    John Cole

    April 11, 2010 at 11:03 am

    I love that you can make your clouds “socialist” by putting a Fascist Hitler mustache on it. Sublime. it’s Jonah Goldberg’s world and we’re just living in it.

  4. 4.

    demo woman

    April 11, 2010 at 11:04 am

    Gotcha!

  5. 5.

    Comrade Jake

    April 11, 2010 at 11:05 am

    A part of me really is cringing over the thought of her upcoming reality teevee show, as it would seem to be the perfect vehicle for her “woe is me, just a regular mom, being attacked by liberals” penchant.

  6. 6.

    General Egali Tarian Stuck

    April 11, 2010 at 11:06 am

    LOL. “To Catch A Levi Johnston” priceless.

    This video is the proper way to start a Sunday morn.

  7. 7.

    Comrade Mary

    April 11, 2010 at 11:07 am

    I skipped SNL last night, but it looks as if I missed something good.

    Canucks and others who can’t get NBC, the YT version is here (for now).

  8. 8.

    El Cid

    April 11, 2010 at 11:07 am

    On this:

    If John McCain had any honor, dignity, and shame, after watching that video he would grab her and take her with him to Dick Cheney’s undisclosed nation and hope the entire world would forget about them and the fact that he foisted her onto the national platform.

    And if Jesus came back and were available for parties to turn water into wine, we’d all have some great parties.

  9. 9.

    debit

    April 11, 2010 at 11:08 am

    @John Cole: Funny. I couldn’t remember the name of the guy they were parodying, so I typed “happy little clouds” into google and got Bob Ross. Awesome.

  10. 10.

    abo gato

    April 11, 2010 at 11:09 am

    Well that was good, but it can’t hold a candle to Betty Bowers giving Sarah the “Worst Mother in America” award……watch and laugh:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77E4S87dWMU

  11. 11.

    cmorenc

    April 11, 2010 at 11:14 am

    Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth. It’s as if John McCain accidentally invented Sarah Palin as a perfect archetype so the democrats wouldn’t have to. Perfect in that she appeals irresistibly to a huge wingnut block within the GOP, while scaring the bejeesus out of a majority of the rest of the electorate. The more she keeps herself up front and center as a leading force within the GOP who must be pampered and catered to, the higher the percentage of swing voters will be turned off in the end from their temptation to blindly vote out incumbent democrats for the continuing uncertainty in an economy devastated by eight years of GOP greed and feckless stupidity that can’t be fixed in only twelve or eighteen months.

  12. 12.

    mrak

    April 11, 2010 at 11:16 am

    That’s not fair.

    It’s almost like they’re ridiculing Sarah Palin, just because she’s ridiculous.

  13. 13.

    cmorenc

    April 11, 2010 at 11:17 am

    John McCain has no shame. Being a maverick means never having to apologize or feel shame, including taking full advantage of your maverick reputation for years, regardless of whether it was deserved or not, and then shamelessly claiming you were never a maverick (even though you ghostwrote a book about yourself extolling same a few years back).

    Being mavericky means never having to say you’re sorry.

  14. 14.

    dmsilev

    April 11, 2010 at 11:19 am

    If John McCain had any honor, dignity, and shame, after watching that video he’d commit seppuku.

    Fixed.

    dms

  15. 15.

    Dave Ruddell

    April 11, 2010 at 11:19 am

    I wonder if NBC has some sort of contract with Tina Fey, such that, if Palin is the nominee in 2012, they have her locked up for SNL.

  16. 16.

    Uloborus

    April 11, 2010 at 11:19 am

    If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this blog and the articles it links to, it’s that McCain never HAD any honor, dignity, or shame.

  17. 17.

    Mike E

    April 11, 2010 at 11:21 am

    @abo gato: Alaskanence indeed!

  18. 18.

    Mike E

    April 11, 2010 at 11:24 am

    @dmsilev: Did you know McCain was a POW?! He’s unable to use a cellphone!

  19. 19.

    pika

    April 11, 2010 at 11:26 am

    Todd! is now my answer to anything my students ask me. Of course, they won’t understand my response because I’ll be speaking in the Charlie Brown adult voice. Go Sarah.

  20. 20.

    debit

    April 11, 2010 at 11:26 am

    @Mike E: Eh. If he could use a cellphone, he’d just use it to call up his wife and call her a cunt.

  21. 21.

    gbear

    April 11, 2010 at 11:28 am

    my favorite line was about the woman who’s so self-involved in her own career that she’s in her mid-30’s and not a grandmother yet.

  22. 22.

    fucen tarmal

    April 11, 2010 at 11:31 am

    when asked her thoughts on a sarah palin reality show, alanis morrisette said, “holy fuck, that’s what irony means?” ‘someone should have explained it better.”

    yakov smirnoff added, “what a country, in russia, reality always finds, you”

  23. 23.

    JenJen

    April 11, 2010 at 11:33 am

    The “Todd!” show looks AWESOME.

    Also, if anyone missed the show last night, be sure to go find the “Brownie Husband” ad. Hysterical!

  24. 24.

    Bob K

    April 11, 2010 at 11:34 am

    In other Sarah News check out this.

    Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney won the Southern Republican Leadership Conference 2012 presidential straw poll this evening. He beat Texas Rep. Ron Paul (R) by one vote, 439-438.

    The full field (with number of votes):

    Newt Gingrich 18% (321)
    Mike Huckabee 4%
    Gary Johnson 1%
    Sarah Palin 18% (330)
    Ron Paul 24% (438)
    Tim Pawlenty 3%
    Mike Pence 3%
    Mitt Romney 24% (439)
    Rick Santorum 2%

    Gingrich/Palin

    A has been ties with a never was.

  25. 25.

    S. cerevisiae

    April 11, 2010 at 11:38 am

    Oh my God that was fucking brilliant. Please let Palin be the face of the GOP. Please.

  26. 26.

    Chris

    April 11, 2010 at 11:40 am

    This definitely needs the “wingnut hypnotoad” tag. BTW I saw the real thing on “Life” last week. Big scary damn frog.

  27. 27.

    debit

    April 11, 2010 at 11:45 am

    @Bob K: Tim Pawlenty 3%. Let us savor.

  28. 28.

    Phoebe

    April 11, 2010 at 11:46 am

    The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. That was very good.

    And “Alaskanence” — I don’t know what that’s spoofing but I don’t want to know. I like it better as just a made up word that’s supposed to be evocative of… something. Like car names that chop up other words and splice them together, then add “us” to make it sound like a Roman senator maybe. Sweetly pathetic.

  29. 29.

    WereBear

    April 11, 2010 at 11:50 am

    @Uloborus: Word!

    If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this blog and the articles it links to, it’s that McCain never HAD any honor, dignity, or shame.

    I remember when I liked him for what he said; sensible stuff that cut across the grain of Repub thinking. Then I found out he never acted on any of it… and that was actually before they dirty-tricked him in North Carolina with the illegitimate baby thing.

    Imagine; one of the few selfless and humanitarian acts a person could do, (adopting an orphan,) subverted to ruin his ambitions and dreams.

    How… Republican.

  30. 30.

    J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford

    April 11, 2010 at 11:59 am

    You LIBTARDS are woefully misunderestimating Sarah Palin. Sarah is in touch with REAL AMERICANS and if she can successfully avoid ever having to be interviewed by anyone other than FOX NEWS she will probably be both PRESIDENT and VICE-PRESIDENT in 2012. How’s that hopey changey workin’ for ya now?

  31. 31.

    Quackosaur

    April 11, 2010 at 12:01 pm

    @Phoebe:

    I think it just follows the Californication play on words:

    Fornication + California = Californication
    Abstinence + Alaska = Alaskanence

  32. 32.

    gbear

    April 11, 2010 at 12:02 pm

    @debit:

    Tim Pawlenty 3%. Let us savor.

    Yes. I wonder when it’s finally going to dawn on him that nobody gives a flying fuck about anything he does or says? He won’t be able to crawl back to MN for consolation because everyone sees thru him here now too. Such a punk.

  33. 33.

    fucen tarmal

    April 11, 2010 at 12:03 pm

    @Phoebe:

    alaskanence is like virginya is for lovers of everything but.

  34. 34.

    JUST A NORMAL GUY (THE ORIGINAL)

    April 11, 2010 at 12:03 pm

    WELL THE M.S.M. LIB’S OUT IN ‘HOLLY-WIERD’ [LOL] DEFINATELY HAVE MISOVERESTEMATED HOW MUCH ABUSE THE PAILIN SUPPORTER’S CAN TAKE. WELL WE WO’NT ‘RE-TREAT’ FROM THIS LA-LA-LAND TRASH, BUT WE WELL ‘RE-LOAD’ OUR TEEVO SET’S SO WE DO’NT HAVE TO WATCH IT AGAIN.

  35. 35.

    aimai

    April 11, 2010 at 12:03 pm

    “Alaskanance” is a combination of “alaska” and ” abstinence” and I think they softened it a bit because the imaginary heroine is a plucky adult woman with three unexplained children. They could have been really cruel and made it directly about Bristol “the story of a plucky teenage highschooler who believes in staying abstinent until marriage as she tries to raise her little bastard child.”

    aimai

  36. 36.

    hal

    April 11, 2010 at 12:07 pm

    Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney won the Southern Republican Leadership Conference 2012 presidential straw poll this evening. He beat Texas Rep. Ron Paul® by one vote, 439-438.

    Great. 3 years of media speculation about the coming Mitt-pocalypse of 2012, when Romney wins in a landslide and immediately has Obama and his daughters shipped to Guantanamo, where Warden Sarah Palin will get to the bottom of his missing birth certificate.

  37. 37.

    YellowJournalism

    April 11, 2010 at 12:08 pm

    Not accurate enough. Sarah Palin’s hair is currently much worse than this.

  38. 38.

    Violet

    April 11, 2010 at 12:28 pm

    @YellowJournalism:
    Agreed. This is Campaign 2008 hair. Her current hair is very weird looking.

  39. 39.

    hal

    April 11, 2010 at 12:36 pm

    I liked the Tiger Woods sketch. “If Asians and Indians can compete with black people, it’s not a sport.”

  40. 40.

    WereBear

    April 11, 2010 at 12:45 pm

    The R primary brawls last time were pretty much a cage match, and now they have no obvious anointee. This round looks like it will be even more unstructured.

    Quite a change from previous years, when it was all a matter of whose turn it was.

  41. 41.

    canuckistani

    April 11, 2010 at 12:47 pm

    Sarah’s “Goodbye” was the icing on the cake for me.

  42. 42.

    robertdsc

    April 11, 2010 at 12:56 pm

    What a great clip. I think I starbursted, though I’m not sure if it’s from Tina Fey, Sarah Palin, or Tina Fey as Sarah Palin. I need some wingnut welfare to find out.

  43. 43.

    FlipYrWhig

    April 11, 2010 at 12:58 pm

    I want more jokes about Todd Palin. Thanks to Sarah’s sublime ridiculousness, I think Todd! has gotten away with not seeming as ridiculous as he is in his own right.

  44. 44.

    jcricket

    April 11, 2010 at 1:31 pm

    The sad thing is Palin would get 35-40% of the vote anyway. They could run a dead toad (pretty much did with McCain) and still get 40% of the vote. That’s how “polarized” this country is.

    I for one, don’t blame the Democrats or think there’s anything magical they can do to fix this in the short-term. I’m not a believe that “centrism” (i.e. you say measles is a deadly disease, I say good time for all, so let’s settle on “fun time for some”) is any kind of magical panacea. Hell, Obama’s a moderate-to-conservative Democrat and that hasn’t “unified the nation” or stopped the Republicans from calling him a grandma and baby-killing socialist.

    The only thing that will change this is Republicans moving so far to the right (nominating Palin would be a start) that they basically destroy themselves as a party. This doesn’t change attitudes overnight, but within a generation or two, it would restructure America so that the whole political center would move left.

    Democrats don’t have enough balls or smarts to make this happen without Republicans self-destructing, b/c Americans are dumb enough to still fall for the BS Palin spews or trickle-down-economics 30 years after it was proven a failure.

    So let’s PRAY for a nomination of people like Palin across America. It’s probably our only hope.

  45. 45.

    Shalimar

    April 11, 2010 at 1:32 pm

    Very funny, but not particularly realistic. The real Sarah Palin doesn’t speak in complete sentences and isn’t that coherent.

  46. 46.

    cathaireverywhere

    April 11, 2010 at 1:38 pm

    Palin’s current hair looks like a bad wig. You’d think she could afford better…..

    Tina Fey’s bit on Weekend Update was hilarious as well
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/04/11/tina-fey-bombshell-mcgee_n_533171.html

  47. 47.

    Martin

    April 11, 2010 at 1:45 pm

    If Tina Fey has any financial sense she’ll give the limit to Sarah’s PAC and campaign – just for the job security that comes from keeping her as a public official.

  48. 48.

    licensed to kill time

    April 11, 2010 at 1:50 pm

    Between this video and the Tunchawesomeness, my online day started with a big smile and a guffaw or two. Thank you! Now I can proceed to outrage and then depression by reading the Rest of The News.

    Balloon Juice is where I come back to for sanity in the world. It’s like a release valve on the pressure cooker of life.

  49. 49.

    matoko_chan

    April 11, 2010 at 1:53 pm

    I remember Tina Fey saying she hoped she didn’t have to come back an spoof Palin after the election …….i guess the battle has been joined.
    :)

  50. 50.

    ruemara

    April 11, 2010 at 1:58 pm

    Awesome bit of funny, but I must agree that the hair is all wrong. Madame Palin looks like she overdosed on Bumpits.

  51. 51.

    MAGOOS

    April 11, 2010 at 2:09 pm

    The more Palin’s idiocy and ambition is exposed for what it is, the more likely America will see through her. Well done, Tina.

  52. 52.

    TuiMel

    April 11, 2010 at 2:33 pm

    @Bob K:
    What? No Bobby Jindal?
    Maybe all his supporters were down on Bourbon Street.

  53. 53.

    Brachiator

    April 11, 2010 at 2:40 pm

    @MAGOOS:

    The more Palin’s idiocy and ambition is exposed for what it is, the more likely America will see through her. Well done, Tina.

    Palin’s popularity peaked a long time ago. Even many of her supporters realize that she is out of her depth as a national candidate.

    But she is a useful stalking horse and flames wingnut anger and bitterness.

    The main question is which GOP candidate will seriously try to mount a presidential campaign on the basis of Palin’s appeal to fear and stupidity.

  54. 54.

    trollhattan

    April 11, 2010 at 2:40 pm

    @JUST A NORMAL GUY (THE ORIGINAL):

    Sarah, is that you? Don’t ever change, babe!

  55. 55.

    Bubblegum Tate

    April 11, 2010 at 2:49 pm

    @General Egali Tarian Stuck:

    This video is the proper way to start a Sunday morn.

    Agreed. That was amazing–I’m having trouble picking my favorite part. “That one’s got a hidden message!” absolutely cracked me up, though, because I can seriously see Sarah Palin saying that about something so obvious.

  56. 56.

    Joshua Norton

    April 11, 2010 at 2:50 pm

    Sarah is the teabaggers Pied Piper. If she didn’t exist they’d have to invent one like her.

  57. 57.

    LD50

    April 11, 2010 at 2:53 pm

    @JUST A NORMAL GUY (THE ORIGINAL):

    I’m sad. This is the first post of yours I’ve seen that didn’t have the word ‘ABOTU’ in it.

  58. 58.

    Brachiator

    April 11, 2010 at 2:56 pm

    @Comrade Mary:

    Canucks and others who can’t get NBC, the YT version is here (for now).

    The YT version is gone now. Drat!

  59. 59.

    trollhattan

    April 11, 2010 at 2:56 pm

    @Bubblegum Tate:

    A complete win, from the leather jacket right through to the end. “Todd!”

    I’m a little concerned for Tina’s safety the next three years. Don’t touch the moose sausage, Tina.

  60. 60.

    Pasquinade

    April 11, 2010 at 2:59 pm

    Join the Twitter fun: #PalinCampaignSlogans

    http://twitter.com/#search?q=%23PalinCampaignSlogans

    @Catballou: Does this dress make me look smart?

    @TheRiverWanders: When is the talent portion of the President Pageant?

  61. 61.

    Svensker

    April 11, 2010 at 3:04 pm

    @Pasquinade:

    Does this dress make me look smart?

    Ha ha ha.

  62. 62.

    Bubblegum Tate

    April 11, 2010 at 3:04 pm

    @trollhattan:

    “Todd!”

    If that were a real show, I would probably watch it.

  63. 63.

    Pasquinade

    April 11, 2010 at 3:30 pm

    Tina Fey/SNL spawned hashtag:

    #SarahPalinNetwork

    http://twitter.com/#search?q=%23SarahPalinNetwork

    Add your own “show”.

  64. 64.

    Peter J

    April 11, 2010 at 3:35 pm

    Have you though of taking Tunch to an audition for ‘Fat Cat$’?

  65. 65.

    gogol's wife

    April 11, 2010 at 5:12 pm

    @licensed to kill time:

    Same here.

    I agree that they just can’t make Tina Fey as repulsive and nasty as the original. I kind of like this woman that Tina Fey is playing. She’s cute.

  66. 66.

    asiangrrlMN

    April 11, 2010 at 6:50 pm

    @gbear: Man, I’m lovin’ the big fail that is Ratface Pawlenty. Hope you like the taste of crow, Timmeh!

    Love Tina Fey, but yeah, she’s more cute and endearing than nasty and annoying as Palin.

  67. 67.

    Montana

    April 12, 2010 at 7:32 pm

    This was too funny because we all know they would try it if they could. Keep going Silver medalist winner Bailin, priceless.

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