Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

You are so fucked. Still, I wish you the best of luck.

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

Also, are you sure you want people to rate your comments?

The unpunished coup was a training exercise.

We’re watching the self-immolation of the leading world power on a level unprecedented in human history.

President Musk and Trump are both poorly raised, coddled 8 year old boys.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

Museums are not America’s attic for its racist shit.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

How any woman could possibly vote for this smug smarmy piece of misogynistic crap is beyond understanding.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

Republicans want to make it harder to vote and easier for them to cheat.

Anyone who bans teaching American history has no right to shape America’s future.

These days, even the boring Republicans are nuts.

Republicans do not trust women.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

“Loving your country does not mean lying about its history.”

Stamping your little feets and demanding that they see how important you are? Not working anymore.

Is it irresponsible to speculate? It is irresponsible not to.

Come on, man.

Humiliatingly small and eclipsed by the derision of millions.

Technically true, but collectively nonsense

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

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Reader Interactions

76Comments

  4. 4.

    Yutsano

    @Redshirt: It’s a good friend of mine’s birthday as well. She gets acutely reminded of that little factoid often.

    And can I just say right now that being allergic to Mary Jane bites the big weiner?

  6. 6.

    J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford

    Hey Gillespie, Fonzie and Simon Cowell called, they want their jacket and t-shirt back.

  7. 7.

    Fergus Wooster

    Nice. . .

    @Redshirt: I was thrilled when I learned (later than most of my peers) about 4/20.

    As it’s my birthday, it meant I could play up some connection other than Der Fuehrer. This works out much better for me.

    @Yutsano: You have my deepest sympathy. Seriously. Yikes.

  8. 8.

    Redshirt

    Could we anticipate a future where neo-nazi’s and deadhead stoners come together on 4/20 to bond over tasty and special baked treats?

    Ah, America…..

  9. 9.

    Paul in KY

    A happy 4/20 to all fellow Juicers! Hope Tunch & the other kittehs get some nip today. Also.

  11. 11.

    eemom

    Jane Hamsher of all people is making this her new cause celebre.

    I do b’lieve she’s turned over a new leaf.

    Tea hee.

  12. 12.

    jl

    He sounds completely sober, and he didn’t call it hemp. Never seen a guy in a leather jacket pitch legalizing dope like that before.

    Not sure what to make of it.

    He also forgot a good reason. Legal dope will make home economics classes more popular in high school, especially the brownie baking lessons.

  15. 15.

    Mike Kay

    I’m waiting for his video on legalizing heroin. After all, as he said, “we all own our own bodies”.

  19. 19.

    dr. bloor

    Yes, I chose this as my 420 piece of the day just to piss John off.

    Punk. When I was your age, it wasn’t a day, it was a lifestyle.

  20. 20.

    Common Sense

    Also the anniversary of Columbine. Horrible day for me until I found out that my stepbrother, who went to high school in Littleton, did not attend Columbine.

    Bummer dude.

    OT but Rasmussen has the TX gubernatorial race as essentially a toss up. When Rasmussen says a GOP incumbent is vulnerable, you know they are in trouble:

    —-

    A new Rasmussen Reports telephone survey of likely Texas voters finds Perry with 48% support. His Democratic opponent, former Houston Mayor Bill White, picks up 44% of the vote, his best showing to date. Two percent (2%) prefer some other candidate in the race, and six percent (6%) remain undecided.

    A month ago, just after beating back Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison’s GOP Primary challenge, Perry led White 49% to 43%.

    Any incumbent who earns less than 50% support at this stage of a campaign is considered potentially vulnerable.

    Perry has hit 50% only once so far this year, in January just after White announced his candidacy.

    White is viewed very favorably by 21% of Texas voters and very unfavorably by 16%.

    For Perry, very favorables are 20% and very unfavorables 22%.

    Both candidates are well-known in the state, but at this point in a campaign, Rasmussen Reports considers the number of people with strong opinions more significant than the total favorable/unfavorable numbers.

  21. 21.

    norbizness

    It just looks like Anton Chigurh in his casual wear. Heads you smoke me out, tails you get the bolt-airgun.

  25. 25.

    Lev

    Cruising? I thought I was the only person who had seen that movie. I can’t even imagine stars like Paul Sorvino or Al Pacino appearing in a movie like that today, although Sorvino’s “Ever have a man empty your pipe?” is a favorite quotable line to me.

  26. 26.

    Lee

    Actually isn’t this what John thinks (and I agree) Reason should be focusing on?

    Reason should be hammering the shit out of this issue yet they are turning out I <3 Tea Party articles.

  27. 27.

    DonkeyKong

    He’s looking a little more Michael Dukakis these days with the leather jacket fitting like a tank helmet.

  32. 32.

    Mike Kay

    @Lev: forget about the actors, I don’t think you can get that movie made today, period.

    Sad to see how uptight society is about sex.

  33. 33.

    Ripley

    4/21: National Dye Everything Black Day (including your hair). Can’t wait for the video.

  34. 34.

    James K. Polk, Esq.

    My only religious holiday, being agnostic, is today, and I don’t get it off from work…

    Stupid non-seperation of church and state.

  36. 36.

    Chyron HR

    Yes, I chose this as my 420 piece of the day just to piss John off.

    But it’s only 4:00 here.

  39. 39.

    Martin

    I learned how to pronounce Eyjafjallajökull today. Not sure if MJ would have made that easier or harder. Probably easier today, though tomorrow it would have been harder.

  41. 41.

    licensed to kill time

    @Martin:

    I heard an opera singer sing it on my teevee today. It was the first time I had a clue how to pronounce it.
    It’s kind of eye yaff ya’ll a yokel, that’s how I’m saying it !

  42. 42.

    Mark S.

    Chunky Bobo is running out of countries where priest sex abuse hasn’t occurred:

    The detention of an 83-year-old priest in Brazil for allegedly abusing boys as young as 12 has added to the scandals hitting the Roman Catholic Church in Latin America, even as Chile’s bishops asked pardon on Tuesday for past sexual abuse cases.

    I haven’t heard of any scandals in Antarctica or on the moon.

  49. 49.

    El Cid

    Georgia’s state legislature is holding VERY IMPORTANT hearings on Obamunist plans to inject all of us with tracking microchips.

    A witness testifying on this matter in front of our esteemed legislature clarified that someone had inserted this tracking chip in her hoo-ha.

    At the House hearing, state Rep. Ed Setzler (R-Kennesaw), who is shouldering the legislation in the House, spoke earnestly for better than a half hour on microchips as a literal invasion of privacy.
    …
    He was followed by a hefty woman who described herself as a resident of DeKalb County. “I’m also one of the people in Georgia who has a microchip,” the woman said. Slowly, she began to lead the assembled lawmakers down a path they didn’t want to take.
    …
    Microchips, the woman began, “infringe on issues that are fundamental to our very existence. Our rights to privacy, our rights to bodily integrity, the right to say no to foreign objects being put in our body.”
    …
    She spoke of the “right to work without being tortured by co-workers who are activating these microchips by using their cell phones and other electronic devices.”
    …
    She continued. “Microchips are like little beepers. Just imagine, if you will, having a beeper in your rectum or genital area, the most sensitive area of your body. And your beeper numbers displayed on billboards throughout the city. All done without your permission,” she said.
    …
    It was not funny, and no one laughed.
    …
    “Ma’am, did you say you have a microchip?” asked state Rep. Tom Weldon (R-Ringgold).
    …
    “Yes, I do. This microchip was put in my vaginal-rectum area,” she replied. Setzler, the sponsoring lawmaker, sat next to the witness – his head bowed.
    …
    “You’re saying this was involuntary?” Weldon continued.
    …
    The woman said she had been pushing a court case through the system for the last eight years to have the device removed.
    …
    Wendell Willard (R-Atlanta), chairman of the House Judiciary Committee, picked up the questioning.
    …
    “Who implanted this in you?” he asked.
    …
    “Researchers with the federal government,” she said.
    …
    “And who in the federal government implanted it?” Willard asked.
    …
    “The Department of Defense.”
    …
    “Thank you, ma’am.”
    …
    The woman was allowed to go about her business, and the House Judiciary Committee approved passage of SB 235.

  51. 51.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    This is your country.

    This is your country on conservatism.

    “Ma’am, did you say you have a microchip?” asked state Rep. Tom Weldon (R-Ringgold).

    “Yes, I do. This microchip was put in my vaginal-rectum area,” she replied. Setzler, the sponsoring lawmaker, sat next to the witness – his head bowed.

    Edit: Ah. I see.

    It’s the microchips. It’s making us all post the same thing.

  52. 52.

    Mark S.

    @El Cid:

    I love how the penalty for implanting a microchip into someone against their will is a misdemeanor. We’re sending a message, but let’s not get too crazy about it.

  55. 55.

    peach flavored shampoo

    The woman was allowed to go about her business, and the House Judiciary Committee approved passage of SB 235.

    And that says all you’ll ever need to know about the Georgia state legislature.

  56. 56.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    It’s the “And your beeper numbers displayed on billboards throughout the city. All done without your permission” that makes it art.

  57. 57.

    Punchy

    I can see the headline now….

    “No One Hahas as Hoo-ha Hijinks Highjacks House Hearings”

  58. 58.

    Bill E Pilgrim

    Maybe this is more from that school district in PA. They’ve moved beyond Webcams. Photos to follow…..

  59. 59.

    R-Jud

    @Punchy:

    “No One Hahas as Hoo-ha Hijinks Highjacks House Hearings”

    Oh, come on. That was my last glass of wine and now it’s all over the desk.

  64. 64.

    El Cid

    @peach flavored shampoo: Well, there wasn’t exactly any constituency or set of lawmakers or powerful lobby in favor of allowing someone to forcibly implant a microchip in people without their permission, so, um, approved.

  67. 67.

    licensed to kill time

    I have a comment in moderation and I want to bitch about it.

    Bitch bitch bitch! There.

    Punchy, you won this thread, please pick up your internet at the door.

  68. 68.

    Comrade Dread

    @Bret: We’re trying to legalize it in California.

    If it passes, I’ll be real curious to see if Republicans and the Tea Party Brigades will join us in us Californian’s attempt to assert our state’s rights.

    Besides, I don’t think it’s an either/or choice. Most of the stoners I’ve known have also been known to keep up this Irishman when it comes to the drinkin’.

  70. 70.

    IndieTarheel

    @R-Jud: Yes, I hit reply to the wrong comment.
    __
    Although, as a fan of high comedy, I would most likely find the Merlot Spit-Take Bulletin quite engaging.

  72. 72.

    HumboldtBlue

    I’m waiting for his video on legalizing heroin. After all, as he said, “we all own our own bodies”.

    I know a well respected police chief who advocates for that position openly. It’s not just the uselessness of the so-called war on drugs, but allowing human beings access to their drug of choice cuts out all of the bullshit that is necessary to do it when the substance is deemed illegal.

    As has been pointed out a million time, the war on drugs will never end because too many people will lose money and jobs.

  74. 74.

    DFH no. 6

    Was at Coachella this weekend (one of the very few geezers there — how come more Boomers aren’t into all the great indie rock/whatever you want to call what the kids are listening to today, I wonder?).

    The crowd (over 140,000 tickets sold, dwarfing whatever actual numbers the lying teabag assholes have gotten) was totally mellow the whole time. Really, the friendliest, most tolerant, and most courteous concert crowd I’ve ever experienced in my many years attending such soirees.

    Most of the areas close to each stage were jam-packed, but everyone was cool, no matter how hot (around 90 in the afternoon) or pressed or jostled.

    Why the universal niceness? Maybe a coincindence, but it was also the most pot-infused concert I’ve ever attended, by far (and I saw Pink Floyd in a cloud of smoke out in the woods near Cleveland back in the early 70s). Coachella was pretty much constant toking up all around, for 10-12 hours each day.

    The kids are all right.

  75. 75.

    Wile E. Quixote

    @chrismealy:

    Same here, but I agree with DougJ when he says that he looks like something out of Cruising. Or perhaps a furtive closeted Republican hanging around a leather bar on Friday night hoping to get some action.

  76. 76.

    Wile E. Quixote

    @Mike Kay:

    I’m waiting for his video on legalizing heroin. After all, as he said, “we all own our own bodies”.

    Why not? I mean really, why not legalize smack? Quick survey:

    Would you start shooting smack if it became legal tomorrow? That is to say have you ever said to yourself “I’d really like to start shooting smack, but can’t because of the Man and his damn drug laws against it?”

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