Hi. My name is Tunch. I know my owner has 3 throws on the couches and the lazyboy, there are two pet beds and five pet pads scattered strategically for my use throughout the house, and there is even a ratty old green blanket on the spare bed in the guest bedroom, which is normally closed to keep me out. Which is why I found this unprotected portion of the guest bed the best place in the whole wide world to sleep.
I just give up. I wish I knew how he was getting into that room. If he has figured out “doorknobs” I am screwed.