GOS highlights some top-notch investigative work from the Politico’s Mike Allen:
Newt Gingrich forecasts Obama loss
Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich gives President Barack Obama only a 20 percent chance of being reelected — and says he might be the one to give Obama the boot.
Even for Mike Allen, this can’t be newsworthy.
Zifnab
Smart money on Bob Dole?
toujoursdan
I give Newt a 20% chance of staying with his current wife.
IndieTarheel
Love the smell of wingnut whistling
past the graveyardDixie. Smells like…fear.Martin
20%? Seriously? If Michael Brown ran for mayor of New Orleans as the GOP nominee, I wouldn’t peg his chances as low as 20%.
How did we miss this character?
h/t to Sully. (Sue me, I’m home sick and bored)
Hunter Gathers
Well, I guess it’s between him and Bible Spice. Getting Mondaled in 2012, that is.
joe from Lowell
Well, he was right about the 1990s being an era of recessions and soup lines if the Clinton economic program passed.
licensed to kill time
Newt ‘The Boot’. Bwaaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Yeah, good luck with that, Newty patootie.
Lev
The next Republican nominee, ladies and gentlemen. I give him about a 20% chance.
Wouldn’t that campaign be hilarious, though? It would basically be the same if Romney got it. These two dudes have done so much bullshitting over the years that the Obama team would be able to design their whole campaign around well-parceled tidbits from a google dump. Remember when Newt supported Masscare and cap-and-trade? When Mitt did? Good times.
Midnight Marauder
Looks like you don’t know Mike Allen.
Persia
“Newt 20% more delusional than previously realized. Film at 11.”
mistersnrub
Item! Newt Gingrich says there is a 20% chance he eats a ham sandwich for lunch today. 90% chance he naps away the afternoon.
Alex
And you’ll get a pony, right Newt?
comrade scott's agenda of rage
Fixed. Especially if it’s parroting Repub talking points.
neill
hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahaha
Newt Gingrich: The Future of the Republican Party!!!1!!1
We’re doomed…DOOMED, I say.
Run…
MikeJ
@toujoursdan: When he picked up the current wife and converted to Catholicism, did he have his children, if any, retroactively made bastards?
JGabriel
Mike Allen:
I picture it something like this:
Newt raises his foot to Obama’s backside, but Obama turns, catches the boot, and lifts, planting Newt on his ass. The boot, which slips off his Newt’s foot while he falls backwards, rests in Obama’s hand.
“Hey, Newt,” the president says, “I’ve got your boot.”
He gives Newt a shit-eating grin. “Don’t worry I’ll treasure it and store it with my other favorite memento’s, like the Flash clip of Bunning saying health care would be my Waterloo. See ya later, adulterator.”
.
Cat Lady
Yeah, the country is desperate for a president whose name invokes both a small slimy lizard and a cartoon misanthrope who wages an actual war against Christmas, and who elevates hypocrisy, gluttony and false pride to an art form.
Fat, venal, beady eyed and delusional is no way to go through life, Newtie.
flukebucket
@Martin:
If that guy does not become a politician I can pretty much guarantee you he will become a policeman.
And I sure hope Newt runs for President. That will be great fun.
MikeJ
@MikeJ: On further thought, Retroactive Bastards is a pretty good band name.
JGabriel
@toujoursdan:
I give Newt a 20% chance of making it to the first primary, and a .02% chance of making it to the second.
.
Rommie
Ah, but will Rush and Co. squeal like pigs while carrying the water again, like they did with McCain – or declare that this is the last teabag and go Rogue with their choice candidate?
Or will Newt BE their choice candidate?
JGabriel
The Economist via Martin:
Jesus.
But wait! There’s a punchline:
.
balconesfault
Clearly, when Obama wins by an even greater margin than in 2008, Newt’s words will vindicate the inevitable claim of ACORN FRAUD.
fourlegsgood
Newt is always wrong, so I now up Obama’s odds of a second term to about 90%.
Thanks Newtie!!
JCT
Yesiree, just can’t wait for the Republicans to unite behind a serial-adulterer who has more “WTF” soundbites than the snowbilly grifter.
Good lord, why does anyone care what Newt Gingrich “thinks”?
JGabriel
@JCT: For the COMEDY!
.
Zifnab
@JGabriel: Wow. I really want to be surprised, and yet somehow I’m not.
Brian J
At the risk of inciting a little riot on this thread, I’ll say that this, and not anything written about Blumenthal, is an example of really shitty journalism.
But anyway, if Gingrich is the nominee, I’d say that, like Palin, he’s looking at a loss of at least 35 states. Unless things are so bad that it’s likely Obama will lose to anyone, at which point there will be several people besides Gingrich who could get the nomination trying to get it, he doesn’t have a prayer.
Violet
I can’t imagine women rallying behind Newt. The man has treated his wives terribly. That kind of behavior doesn’t win votes.
Bill Murray
@Cat Lady: I give Salamander Whiplash a 20% better chance than Newtie-pie
The Moar You Know
I’ve seen Newt Gingrich. That guy ain’t “running” for anything, not without supplemental oxygen, an AED, and an ambulance escort.
I bet the inside of his arteries looks like the bottom of a fry vat at McDonalds.
JGabriel
@Violet: I can’t imagine that Gingrich’s annulment(s?) plays well with Catholic women.
.
Michael
OT – At my polling place today, I was chatting amiably with the GOP poll worker, a nice lady who drove my kids’ school bus through elementary and middle schools. She knows I’m registered D, my wife registered R, and there’s a lot of good natured ribbing between us. In walks a voter (who’s an obvious teabagger on the younger side undoubtedly with a full on chubby about voting for Rand Paul) chortling about how he knows there’s “no Dems in ____________ County”. The glare from the bus driver/GOP election officer at him was epic. It pretty well stopped him in his tracks.
gwangung
@Michael: Hm. I surprised that he was even aware enough of his surroundings to be able to do that.
jibeaux
But how can we convince Bill Kristol to make this prediction?
Splitting Image
90% is probably a lowball for an Obama win in 2012, unless there is a double-dip recession. If that turns out to be the case, Obama will have his hands full trying to be re-elected, but Newt won’t be the guy to take him out.
Assuming Jon Huntsman is still in China, I would say Chuck Hagel is their best choice, but the teabaggers don’t really like either one. It’s so hard to put odds because anybody who looks sane enough and intelligent enough to actually run a decent campaign can’t win.
Overall, I might give Mike Huckabee the best chance of winning against Obama (i.e. actually winning the nomination and then winning the election), but I don’t think the G.O.P. will enjoy defending a guy who paroled a convicted rapist so that he could go out and kill someone. Or who paroled a convicted burglar so that he could go out and kill a few cops. The money boys also pretty much hate his guts.
JGabriel
@jibeaux:
By waiting?
.
strawmanmunny
@Michael:
Where in Kentucky, Michael.
Here in Lexington, they had only 81 out of 600 that had voted in my polling place.
Kentucky has some good idiot teabaggers. It’s embarrassing….but good for a laugh.
catclub
Mostly OT but hey:
Guns and ammo sales have been very high the last 18 months because the gun dealers claim that “Obama will take away your guns!”
and the rubes buy it! – and lots of guns!
Will these dealers work for Obama’s re-election since they know that if a GOP candidate is elected their candy store closes down?
Or are they also true believers that … any day now, the jackbooted government thugs are coming for their guns?
Napoleon
@Splitting Image:
Huckabee is the one person they have that I seriously worry about winning.
toujoursdan
I find it really hard to believe that Huckabee can win a general election. He’s far too evangelical to attract above the 33% percent wingnut crowd.
Even some of my younger evangelical friends think he’s too strange/extreme. That group is changing pretty fast too. They are far more concerned with the environment and far less concerned about gay people and abortion than Huckabee’s generation.
JGabriel
@Splitting Image:
Huckabee is earnning too much money at Fox, and enjoying himself too much there, to consider running for President again.
So is Palin, but her vanity might compel her anyway, as well as the speaking fees she could command later if she won.
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Eric U.
Newt running for prez would beat Giuliani for entertainment value
Cacti
I hope for a Newt/Palin GOP ticket.
If that doesn’t have Goldwater-esque landslide written all over it, what does?
The Moar You Know
@catclub: No shit. I have a hard time finding anything that I shoot on store shelves, or even mailorder, for that matter.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Not a chance. Gun stores are like bars. They don’t go out of business unless the owner dies without leaving it to anyone.
You need to expand your horizons and go to a gun show some time. Those people are the original True Believers. They are what made me decide to buy guns as an adult; I’m not going to be unarmed when those people snap and go on a fucking ethnic cleansing rampage.
someguy
Well, Newt always has been in favor of drug legalization. Good to see he’s practicing what he preaches.
comrade scott's agenda of rage
@The Moar You Know:
Everybody should read Joe Bageant’s “Deer Hunting with Jesus”. It’s an eye opener about guns and the gun culture. Joe’s a wild-eyed socialist who’s a big believer in gun ownership, at least the kind he grew up with.
But don’t get him started on the suburban/exurban wingnut “warriors” who make 80K + a year and buy the guns designed to kill people, not just go huntin’ with. Those are the people to be scared about. Of course at the first whiff of real shooting, said pussies will hop in their SUV and hightail it for the hills.
Michael
@strawmanmunny:
Oldham. Generally goes R+15 in presidential years.
Allan
In related news, Glenn Beck says we should buy more gold.
Oh wait, I’m confusing commercials with news stories again.
Remember November
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Even against like competitors, Newt fails.
Remember November
@The Moar You Know:
yes, sad that we have to arm ourselves against the rabid gun-crazies for our own defense.
strawmanmunny
@Michael:
Ouch. (not about Oldham Co, but the +15)
This whole state has gone Republican. It’s nauseating. Hell, even the Democrats running are just Republican-Lite(usually)
That said, it seems if Paul wins, the Democrats might have a chance to win the seat in November. But, Good Lord, there are people here in “liberal” Lexington that just HATE Obama. Guess we aren’t in the bottom 10 for education for nothing. lol
AngusTheGodOfMeat
God, I hope he tries it.
Michael
@strawmanmunny:
I’m under no illusion that Obama will do any better in KY than he did last time. I’m just happy I work in the People’s Republic of Louisville and that I’m hearing no Obama voter voices saying that they wished they’d voted for McCain/Palin instead.
strawmanmunny
@Michael:
Next to Louisville, I guess Lexington is the best place to be for an O-Bot in Kentucky. It was just depressing watching so many people I know fall for all that crap spewed at Obama. It’s a bit weird(don’t know if that is the right word) being in a place that a lot of people seem to be directly opposed to what I believe and especially when it comes from friends/people that you thought you knew.
Of course, I have heard several of the “get gov’t away from my medicare” type things said, so it just gets to a point I have to shake my head and laugh it off. There are times when I think let them have what they want and let’s see how they get along then.
Ash Can
Sounds like Newtie learned math from Karl Rove.
mistersnrub
Newt has as much of a chance as Fred Thompson of beating Obama. I absolutely hope that he runs – his humiliating defeat would rank highly on the schadenfreudemeter. Obama has already relegated McCain to the dustbin of history and unmasked him for everyone to see the pitiful old loser that he is…Newt is ripe for similar ignominy.
kommrade reproductive vigor
Shorter Newt: Hey! Look it me! I might run for president! Hey! Hey, pay attention to me!!
Here’s what’ll happen: Newt will continue to play cute with hints of his interest in possibly maybe giving Obama the boot and other tough guy fappery. The media can’t resist that shit. Then, when crunch time comes and he either has to get off his fat ass and campaign or StFu, he’ll say he can’t run [insert feeble excuse here] and anyone who might have voted for him should vote for [Repub he thinks most likely to win]. The transcriptionists will continue to trek to Newt’s door for his opinion on Republican X and how he’s doing against Obama.
If Republican X wins Newt gets major King Maker cred and will inflict another book on the public. Plus he’ll drop hints to the new Prez. that if it weren’t for him sending all of his voters to X he wouldn’t have won, so give him a cushy job.
Bob L
@fourlegsgood: Yes, if we could only get Bill Kystal to back up Newt prediction and Rassamon to produce a poll results for it.
JGabriel
@mistersnrub:
Honestly, McCain did that to himself.
.
Chuck
Newt should know about the boot — didn’t he effectively get it from his own party after he marched his party off the cliff the first time around?
CalD
The Politico: You keep linking, they’ll keep spewing.
Mike in NC
He did, and he remains an insufferable douchebag with no new ideas a decade and a half later.
tenkindsofgrumpy
@catclub: THis scenario gives me all kinds of trouble.If Obama is going to confiscate all your guns, why would you waste money going out to buy more guns and ammo? After all, he will get them all no matter how many you have. How can this scare story work if it makes no sense?
Comrade Luke
In that GOS article, they’re way off on DeMint becoming majority leader if the Republicans win back the Senate.
After reading that Rove article in Rolling Stone I expect McConnell to get that. I have no doubt that Rove would make sure of it.