Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

There is no compromise when it comes to body autonomy. You either have it or you don’t.

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

When do the post office & the dmv weigh in on the wuhan virus?

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

Spilling the end game before they can coat it in frankl luntz-approved dogwhistles.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

This country desperately needs a functioning Fourth Estate.

White supremacy is terrorism.

Ron DeSantis, the grand wizard, oops, governor of FL.

A lot of Dems talk about what the media tells them to talk about. Not helpful.

The arc of the moral universe doesn’t bend itself. it’s up to us.

Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.

It’s all just conspiracy shit beamed down from the mothership.

Don’t expect peaches from an apple tree.

He seems like a smart guy, but JFC, what a dick!

In after Baud. Damn.

The new republican ‘Pastor’ of the House is an odious authoritarian little creep.

Somebody needs to explain to DeSantis that nobody needs to do anything to make him look bad.

The line between political reporting and fan fiction continues to blur.

The words do not have to be perfect.

“The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.”

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Fish gotta swim

Fish gotta swim

by | 268 Comments

This post is in: 

This is awesome (h/t Mike Kay):

Republicans were very pleased with their technological sophistication as they introduced the Web site, America Speaking Out a ceremony at the Newseum. Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.), who created the program, said that to get software for the site, “I personally traveled to Washington state and discovered a Microsoft program that helped NASA map the moon.”

Using lunar software is appropriate, because the early responses to the Republicans’ request for ideas are pretty far out:

“End Child Labor Laws,” suggests one helpful participant. “We coddle children too much. They need to spend their youth in the factories.”

“How about if Congress actually do thier job and VET or Usurper in Chief, Obama is NOT a Natural Born Citizen in any way,” recommends another. “That fake so called birth certificate is useless.”

“A ‘teacher’ told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!” a third complains. “And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story.”

My favorite by far is the fish thing.

I just signed up for an account.

Update. More gold standardism than I would have expected. I don’t think these are all spoofs.

Update. In honor of the late, great blogs4brownback, I’m promoting this one.

Update. They seem to have deleted most of the ideas. Sad.

Update. It’s back up with all the ideas and responses intact.

Reader Interactions

268Comments

  1. 1.

    Steve

    But which are spoofs and which are the real thing? Offhand, I would say 1 and 3 are spoofs and 2 is real. But if I’m wrong about one of them it would be 3.

  3. 3.

    Zifnab

    I wonder if we can get a solid wave of “Repeal the 17th Amendment” comments going?

  4. 4.

    Calouste

    @Steve:

    I think you are correct. 1 and 3 are without spelling mistakes whereas 2 has two, besides some rather autrocious grammar.

  5. 5.

    Warren Terra

    I rather admired this comment by “Jake” at Crooked Timber monday, which I offer as a suitable (and Rand-Paul-relevant) template:

    Racial discrimination is not good for businesses. Any business that does not discriminate exhibit better profits than racist businesses. The removal of Jim Crow laws and the privatization of institutions would result in the end of racial discrimination through the free market. Read Chapter 7 in ‘Capitalism and Freedom’ by Milton Friedman. Change can and should happen on state and local levels without unconstitutional expansion of government power, as what happened with the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

    The great thing about the comment is that it’s not actually clear whether it’s a spoof or it actually came from a willfully ignorant Glibertarian – heaven knows, I’ve seen sincere comments from Glibertarians that, if taken seriously, would prove that racism could never have happened, because it’s so inefficient.

  9. 9.

    Jeff

    End the 40 hour work week– there’s 136 non-productive hours we could be working— who needs sleep anyway!

  12. 12.

    El Cid

    I think if Mr. Pointy Head Isaac Newton knew anything about what he was talking about he wouldn’t have invented gravity in the first place and we would all be able to fly everywhere.

  13. 13.

    Montysano

    No Democrat coins. Replace FDR on the dime with Reagan. Replace JFK on the 50 cent piece with Martin Luther King (Republican). Also replace Grant on the $50 bill with Reagan. Get rid of the Susan B Anthony and Sacagawea coins (deficit reduction).

    Spoof? Not a spoof? Impossible to know.

  14. 14.

    Urza

    Wait, how many people thought DougJ was responsible for half of those comments. But no, he just signed up so who among us was actually doing it?

    Laugh all you want, but there are plenty of right wingers who could be led with little effort to saying we should put kids to work in factories to build character and get them to turn down the loud music, also too, getting them off the lawn. These are the same people not more than 1 generation removed from being saved from that life in the factory or coal mine.

    Do any lessons of our nation ever stick? Or do we just recycle them all a generation or two later, possibly with the same actors playing the same parts.

  15. 15.

    dmsilev

    Someone should echo all the entries from that site and run a “spoof or real” vote on them. For instance, in the ‘Strengthening Families’ section of ‘American Values’:

    The Republican Party should propose a “Family Re-education Act” that would require all non-Christians to learn how to be good parents. If you don’t attend the class, your children will be taken away and fostered by a strong Christian conservative family.

    Or, in ‘Liberty and Freedom’:

    If we could only just arrest people first then ask questions and talk about ‘freedom’ later we’d be a much safer and more secure society. I say arrest everyone, check them out and then let the safe ones go. If they seem dangerous then lock them up or transport them to a place from which they cannot escape. Like the bottom of the sea.

    For ‘Ethics’,

    As a matter of ethics, we should ban sarah palin from ever being allowed to run for any public office, EVER! She’s a tax evader, a liar, a pillar of misinformation, a horrible mother, and a media grabbing, greedy, religious zealot, with ties to extremist groups such as Prayer Warriors. Her input into any political issue is only based on her self-serving agenda. Baggers, birthers and all other fanatics need to stop paying her to flap her ugly jaws. Then, maybe she’d go home to her poor feral children!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Sure, the last one is pretty obvious, but I do like the burst of honesty.

    dms

  16. 16.

    Ed Drone

    @ArchPundit:

    Ah, yes — “great tasting” vs. “less filling!” Or, to cite an older example of the art of advertising, “It’s a breath mint! It’s a candy mint!”

    So it’s a Bud Lite / Certs website. Now if only we could get the California Raisins involved!

    Ed

  17. 17.

    Madeline

    The Web site not only “has cutting-edge technology,” asserted Rep. Peter Roskam (Ill.), “but a winsome design that is easy for people to interact with.”

    Winsome design? Really?

  18. 18.

    dmsilev

    Mwahahahahaha:

    Fire Michael Steele to save the GOP. I can get 80% GOP elected in Congress. Steele is way too devisive. This Nov 2010, we will lose big time with Steele heading the GOP. His comments are often hurtful, not helpful.

    Poor Michael Steele, can’t get any love.

    dms

  19. 19.

    Calouste

    @Warren Terra:

    Any business that does not discriminate exhibit better profits than racist businesses.

    That is a stupid statement even for libertarians. If most of the local market consists of racists, a restaurant or nightclub that discrimates will do far better than one that lets “those other people” in. Expensive restaurants or nightclubs in general run on the “quality” of the clientele as much as they do on the quality of the food or entertainment.

  20. 20.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    HOw long before we see signs in store windows “Ameros NOT accepted here!”

    Personally, I could see #3 being real. I suspect there’s some passage in Genesis that trumps all the nonsense about live birth and lungs and warm blood

  22. 22.

    jl

    @El Cid: That is a good lead in for a suggestion to reduce the deficit by eliminating funding for higher education and university research. Those wasteful boondoggles clearly reduce the standard of living, as demonstrated by that egghead Newton’s harmful invention of gravity. Some one should submit that one.

    I’ll try to open an account and submit it, if no one is brave and honest enough to speak truth to egghead power.

  25. 25.

    MikeJ

    @Madeline: You know that song Lovely from A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum ?

    Winsome,
    What I am is winsome,
    Radiant as in some
    Dream come true.

    All that springs to mind when I hear “winsome”.

  26. 26.

    Jim C.

    Man…that just made my day. I love the fact that oil spills are making dolphins faster and therefore making…faster “fish”.

  29. 29.

    Alex S.

    The child labor idea needs some more cultural resentment, like, “working in the factories makes them stop wearing sagging pants, or making rap music”

  30. 30.

    dmsilev

    Win:

    I think AZ should deport all persons whose names end in a vowel. This will solve the immegration problem, and Sherrif Arpaio and Mike Pence can rest easy.

    (Double win because it was posted by ‘Gary Larson’)

    dms

  31. 31.

    Citizen_X

    Hey, you winsome, you lose some.

    So, is this one spoof or real?

    English is are official langauge. Anybody who ain’t speak it the RIGHT way should kicked out.

    If spoof, the misspellings are teh awsome.

  33. 33.

    Martin

    Dougj – you must go in and spoof the gold standard people. China is the worlds largest gold producer. Clearly these people and gold proponents like Glenn Beck are agents of China to help move the US and other nations onto a gold standard which China will then manipulate for their own communist purposes.

    You need to offer up some other currency backing that the US controls. I’d blow the whole thing by going with frozen concentrated orange juice, but something more subtle should work. Offering up a depleted uranium-backed currency would be hilarious.

  34. 34.

    Keith

    I’m in favor of a federal death penalty for the practicing of witchcraft. I’m also in favor of throwing people in large bodies of water to determine innocence/guilt rather than leave such matters in the hands of activist judges and liberal juries.

  35. 35.

    cleek

    all of my ideas refuse to submit. they get flagged as “inappropriate” . even one as harmless as this:

    It would be nice if we could teach our children the right things. We should start by making Ayn Rands “The Fountainhead” require reading for all students. Because not only is she a great natural-born American writer, she wrote Atlas Hugged, which means she knows what it means to be an independent American producer and not a scab on American workers. Also.

    i screwed around with it a bit, but couldn’t find the key words that triggered the filter,

  37. 37.

    Penon

    Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.), who created the program, said that to get software for the site, “I personally traveled to Washington state and discovered a Microsoft program that helped NASA map the moon.”

    He traveled to the other side of the continent to discover a piece of software? That’s ironic, because I heard there’s this thing called the Internet where he could have found it from his office.

  39. 39.

    Citizen_X

    @Jim C.: That’s the second (at least) reference on that site to the idea that marine mammals = fish. Is this some Fundie meme that’s been going around that I haven’t heard of?

  42. 42.

    Martin

    @cleek: If they were smart, they’d flag ‘Also.’ – that’s a dead giveaway, IMO. Ayn Rand should be flagged as well, since that’s either going to be libertarian troublemakers or spoofs.

    But like I said, if they were smart, which they surely are not.

  43. 43.

    SpotWeld

    I’m just waiting for the request to replace the images on the $1, $5 and $10 bills with Reagan, Joseph McCarthy, and Jesus respectivly.

  46. 46.

    JGabriel

    Kevin McCarthy (via Dana Milbank):

    “I personally traveled to Washington state and discovered a Microsoft program …”

    It was lying amongst the rubble of Mount St. Helens. I, being the rugged individualist that I am, fought through the tribes of America, tamed its forests, hauled that software out of the volcanic rock and mountain gneiss, and and personally – PER. SON. AL. LY. – brought it back out of the wild for the denizens of DC, to improve their lives. The women of DC were grateful, and thanked me in the manner you’d expect them to thank a rugged mountain capitalist of the wild forest, because I’m not gay. Never, ever gay.

    .

  47. 47.

    jayjaybear

    They had to use NASA-esque software TO RUN A FUCKING BLOG?
    —
    Yowsers.

    Forget it, Jake. It’s Republicans.

    Wasn’t it Red State or Free Republic that was BEGGING for IT people to volunteer their time because they were making such a hash of their software and they couldn’t afford real programmers a couple of years ago?

  49. 49.

    Bella Q

    @Madeline:

    You *know* that this working definition of “winsome,” as it’s being used here, has to be something like “winning,” as the actual definition of the word is all wrong in this context. I mean, “engaging,” maybe, but the tone is all wrong.

  51. 51.

    cleek

    don’t forget to vote for the ‘good’ ones !

    aw crap. looks like it’s dead.

    A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now.
    —
    Please wait a moment and try again.

  52. 52.

    schrodinger's cat

    How about we go back to Roman Numerals because the decimal system is not biblical enough?

  54. 54.

    scav

    Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.), who created the program, said that to get software for the site, “I personally traveled to Washington state and discovered a Microsoft program that helped NASA map the moon.”

    mmm, yeah, mickeysoft must be one of those major players in GIS that I entirely missed hearing about. Still, ‘spose in a way we’re exploring lunitics and they could be mapped, so long as the correct info is gathered. Would be fun to interpolate a lunacy surface and find out where all those with the loosest attachments to reality have rolled to.

  58. 58.

    Michael D.

    Second one under National Security:

    We need to train an army of Ninja Cats. Cats are natural born hunters and predators, and it is known that they indeed have 9 lives, many more than the typical human life (being one). They are also excellent at hiding themselves and would be ideal for sneaking into countries and assassinating communist leaders to lessen the ever growing threat of communism, finding key terrorist leaders and shattering the global terrorist network. In fact they could be potentially useful in the current Korean crisis. Loyal to their trainers, the cats could rain destruction and fear throughout the world, and if ever captured would never tell who they are serving. Finally, after they have solved the worlds problems, they could serve as border patrol and show unflinching resolve at keeping illegals where they belong, anywhere but here.

    Clearly, Tunch is a spoof on the site.

  60. 60.

    cleek

    “I personally traveled to Washington state and discovered a Microsoft program that helped NASA map the moon.”

    wow. what an intrepid explorer!

    i “discovered” the same thing using 0.25 seconds of Google time.

  63. 63.

    artem1s

    this one is priceless…

    Stop using outdated systems to compare competiveness. We may not be able to compete in math and science, but we are number one in football (not the foreign football, the real American one). And we are number one in basketball, hockey (Look at the Canadians), and even baseball (though our new immigration laws could hurt this).

  64. 64.

    Anoniminous

    @Citizen_X:

    Back when I was laboring in the SysAdmin mines I used a “language” all the time to make the network run faster.

    As to the other silliness …

    I’d think they were spoofs if I hadn’t visual evidence of their inability to think and spell. My conclusion is: the posts should be considered Serious™ until proven otherwise.

  66. 66.

    4jkb4ia

    Well, we know that dolphins aren’t kosher because they have fins, but they don’t have scales.

    I am openly cheering for Fognini because they made him play in the dark.(Against Monfils, who I would cheer for in any other circumstance)(Monfils saved two match points)

  67. 67.

    elisathon

    “A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now.

    Please wait a moment and try again.”

    It appears that even the frontpage overloaded, not just heliocentrism & gold.
    le sigh.

  68. 68.

    Paul in KY

    @Martin: I was wondering about ‘Fountainhead’. That could sound like you’re getting into the 2 wetsuits & a dildo territory if you’re a non-libitarian leaning Repub.

  69. 69.

    MarkJ

    @ Citizen_X

    That’s a spoof. Whoever wrote it went too far with the second sentence with the ain’t – should have used can’t. The first sentence would have been perfect – confusion between are and our is epidemic. Also, many seem to be confusing too and two.

  71. 71.

    b-psycho

    Check out what some idiot proposed about immigration: “Instead of repealing the 14th amendment, let’s just auto-revoke parent rights for illegals & create a class of immigrant orphan wards of the State!”

    Oh, those “limited government” Republicans…

  72. 72.

    Svensker

    @JGabriel:

    Washington STATE is in the Pacific Northwest, at the top of the Left Coast. There are volcanic mountains there.

    Washington DC is the U.S. capital and is in the middle of the Eastern Seaboard on the Right Coast. There are volcanic assholes there.

    The two have no connection except for the name.

  73. 73.

    Ed Marshall

    Hmmm

    In accordance with the Rock Valley College Acceptable Use Policy of Information Technology Systems, the Barracuda Firewall has filtered the link you are accessing because it contains filtered content. This particular content is categorized as Spam.

    URL: http://www.americaspeakingout.com

  75. 75.

    chris

    Oh, this is manna from heaven. Here’s my contribution:

    Everybody knows that lower taxes stimulate growth, which lowers the deficit… so why have taxes at all? Let’s put an end to this socialist nonsense once and for all!

    It’s my warm-up pitch.

  76. 76.

    Svensker

    Can’t believe no one has yet pointed out that the acronym for Americans Speaking Out is ASO, which brings to mind so many things.

  77. 77.

    sukabi

    @Face: maybe the NASA part is some kind of tracking software… after all, maybe all the Repubs want to start pressing charges against citizens for “complaining about their station in life” as Douchebag Bunning’s done.

  78. 78.

    Anoniminous

    @scav:

    Awe contrary.

    Rep. Kevin McCarthy is aware of all internet traditions as he is one up-to-the-minute hep cat. He’s the caterpillar’s boots and the cat’s pajamas. Bully for him!

    He merely didn’t want to have to wait for his IBM PC – with a 9,600 baud modem! – to download a Google search.

  79. 79.

    gnomedad

    @Mike G:

    Christian Right Lobbies To Overturn Second Law Of Thermodynamics

    Cute, but they actually like the Second Law because it “disproves” evolution.

  81. 81.

    sukabi

    @JGabriel: like Microsoft hasn’t figured out the whole retail / distribution thingy…

    this guy’s a genius, he managed to actually track down software by going to it’s origin… never mind that it was probably outsourced to India for coding / design / creation….

  82. 82.

    MikeJ

    It’s like the GOP spent all this money just to entertain DougJ. 715 points already.

  85. 85.

    Quicksand

    A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now.

    Really? How many is speaking out?

  86. 86.

    Bubblegum Tate

    Am I the only one who reads the thread title a la Omar from The Wire?

    EILEEN NATHAN: Bird committed more than one murder?
    OMAR: Fish gotta swim, know what I’m sayin’?

  88. 88.

    jibeaux

    I like:

    Schools should be required to teach both sides of every issue. Teach gravity with anti-gravity, geology and biology with young earth creationism, and oxygen with phlogiston. Most science teachers refuse to give equal weight to science and dogma. This is really making me mad.

    I created an account, and then it wouldn’t even let me log in. How do they KNOW? Is that the NASA technology?

  89. 89.

    Jerry 101

    @Zifnab:

    Repeal the 17th? Child’s play – they’re already itching to jump on that one.

    How about starting a movement to repeal the 3rd? What wingnut keyboard kommando wouldn’t want to quarter a few soldiers in his mcmansion?

    Or, maybe a movement to repeal the Establishment Clause or the Commerce Clause.

    Actually, I’ll bet that a clever enough person could get Rand Paul on record supporting the repeal of the commerce clause.

    You know what else would be fun? Starting a right-wing movement to repeal the 21st Amendment.

  90. 90.

    scav

    @Anoniminous: I’m both shocked and awed at his total awareness of the tuubz which may or may not be laughing. Froopy dude has totally misspelled Gopher though.

  91. 91.

    drew42

    My website was written in Apple BASIC. I had to swim to Tahiti, through shark-infested waters, to obtain it.

  94. 94.

    Wyliecoat

    I think using the word “heliocentrism” sort of gives away the fact that you’re a trouble maker.

  95. 95.

    db

    This one is awesome:

    THE NAFTA SUPERHIGHWAY MUST BE STOPPED. PLEASE LISTEN TO DR. PAUL ON THIS TOPIC. OUR VERY FREEDOM IS AT STAKE.

  100. 100.

    clussman

    Whenever Republicans launch a new national website I lose hours of productivity. Working late tonight will be worth it though. That site is the gift that keeps on giving.

  103. 103.

    jibeaux

    Okay, I got in now. I hope you all saw this one.

    I want to build Brick Ovens to extract oil from the oil shale that infests this country. We would never have to buy overseas oil again.

    It’s under Energy.

  104. 104.

    4jkb4ia

    @cleek:

    I tried to register but it keeps telling me, “Must select a Representative”. At first I thought it was smart and knew from my zip code what district I was in, but substituting Akin’s district office didn’t help. I am sure it was not smart enough to catch “dougj” as a user ID.

  105. 105.

    MagicPanda

    Man, the americaspeakingout.com site is fun. I’ve wasted more time there than I have in a while.

    The site traffic seems to be smoother now for anyone who is interested in giving it a try.

  106. 106.

    jibeaux

    It did not like my suggestion to abolish social security, and that if and when you die then you could maybe stop working. Now you tell me why that’s not an awesome suggestion under “productivity”?!

  107. 107.

    Chyron HR

    The URL you are accessing has been blocked by the Barracuda Web Filter because it contains content belonging to the category of: Spam

    That was quick. But I’m hard pressed to disagree with their assessment of the GOP’s ideas.

  109. 109.

    cleek

    i keep getting the “A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now.” message.

    boo.

    and i have so many good ideas to share!

  110. 110.

    b-psycho

    Figured I’d put a halfway decent idea (cutting the military budget) up dressed in wingnutese first before I joined the spoofs. Here goes the goof…:

    I fear that going to a gold standard isn’t enough. Suppose some future liberal scientist decides to synthesize gold just to undermine the standard again? We should ban that pre-emptively.

  111. 111.

    jibeaux

    It does seem to have accepted:

    Real Americans pay for their own organ transplants, in cash, and without complaining. Why is it the nanny state government’s job to help you when it’s YOUR kid who was born with the heart defect?

    Cleek, tell me what you want to say. They might boot me soon.

  113. 113.

    Martin

    @Mr Furious: It’s both fascinating and boring to watch the video feed. I’m not a fan of reality TV, but being able to watch something like this is a lot like watching a space mission. After a while you really come to appreciate how technically challenging this activity is, and how unlikely it is that anyone could just swoop in and take it over.

  114. 114.

    Midnight Marauder

    @Wyliecoat:

    I think using the word “heliocentrism” sort of gives away the fact that you’re a trouble maker.

    Or the fact that you are a Real Fucking American Patriot.

    “FREEDOM! GET SOME!” — Thomas Jefferson

    That is just Science. Duh.

  115. 115.

    JGabriel

    @Svensker:

    The two [WA and DC] have no connection except for the name.

    And that Kevin McCarthy apparently discovered software in WA state and hauled it across the country from Redmond to DC, personally.

    Svensker, did you honestly think I don’t know the difference between WA and DC, or did you just have a brain fart?

    .

  117. 117.

    Zifnab

    @JGabriel:

    And that Kevin McCarthy apparently discovered software in WA state and hauled it across the country from Redmond to DC, personally.

    On the taxpayer’s dime, I guarantee it.

  118. 118.

    kommrade reproductive vigor

    And there will be loud screams of O NOES, HAXXORS!* in 5…4…3…

    Damn, I wish you people wouldn’t do this while I was at work.

    *I know it’s not hacking, you know it’s not hacking, but bitching about spoofs isn’t dramatic enough.

  119. 119.

    Mr Furious

    @Martin: There’s not much to watch—you can’t actually see anything inside the BOP.

    I just hope it works and doesn’t backfire. I shudder to think what will unfold if the leak gets worse—which by many estimates is up to 40% likely…Not great odds.

  120. 120.

    MattR

    @jibeaux: Too many BJers spoofing. We gotta coordinate so we don’t clog (both of) their tubes.

    @kommrade reproductive vigor: Having a crappy website that can’t handle the traffic so you blame it on hackers. Where have I heard that before? Just further proof that Joe Lieberman is a Republican.

    @Zifnab: What are the odds they payed all the proper licenses?

  121. 121.

    Tonal Crow

    Didn’t they do something like this about a year ago? And didn’t it attract the same sort of posts? And didn’t they terminate it after about 3 days? There’s something very Groundhog Day-ish about this effort.

  123. 123.

    JGabriel

    @sukabi:

    this guy’s a genius, he managed to actually track down software by going to it’s origin …

    Exactly! McCarthy is a rugged individualist capitalist explorer man of mountain, forest, and adventure who brought discovered and brought back software from the deep wild!

    If it weren’t for McCarthy and his conservative rag-tag team of rebels and explorers, the world would have never known of the vast reserves of software in the Pacific Northwest, or its uses!

    .

  124. 124.

    Rosalita

    Amazing they didn’t learn anything from their last web site experiment that went so well (gop.com); this commentariat sure had fun with it.

  125. 125.

    jibeaux

    @Tonal Crow:

    What I remember was something about what you thought the GOP’s priority should be, or strategery, or something. And “Buy Every American A Pair Of TruckNutz” was #1 for a while.

  126. 126.

    Jay C

    @jayjaybear:

    Actually, RedState’s problem with trying to find a designer willing to help redo their site was that it was all a big liberal plot. SRSLY.

    As Erick put it:

    “The bad news: our liberal “friends” – you know, the ones who believe so strongly in free speech and open debate – have done what they can to prevent us from making these improvements, so that our influence will be minimized just as we head into the 2008 presidential primary season.”

    Except as a source of continual scorn and mockery, it’s hard to imagine how much less influence RS could possibly have had, but that’s today’s conservative: never miss an opportunity for self-victimization.

  127. 127.

    trollhattan

    @Tonal Crow:

    I recall some RNC Website thingie with an animated M.C. Steele strolling across the screen, chatting at his peeps. That was yanked pretty quickly after a little too much fun was had at their expense.

    Republicans seem to not attract any Grade A nerdpower. Wonder why…?

  129. 129.

    JGabriel

    @Zifnab:

    On the taxpayer’s dime, I guarantee it.

    Pshaw! If Keven McCarthy hadn’t discovered software, Al Gore never would have been able to invent the internet!

    .

  130. 130.

    brantl

    I suspect Jesus’ General did the one about heliotropism. It has to be his kind of spoof. Also he was smart enough to spell ‘heliotropism’ and still say the bible says that it isn’t so. Gotta be JG.

  131. 131.

    jibeaux

    I’m just immortalizing here, because who knows how much longer the fun will last. Not mine, btw.

    Rapists should be forced to provide proper compensation to the people they are stealing from – the fathers or husbands of the women they force themselves on. That money could then be spent by the heads of households on things that will help stimulate the economy.

  132. 132.

    MagicPanda

    I don’t think anyone is getting blocked (except for curse words). I think the website is just crashing a lot. Keep trying!

  134. 134.

    Tonal Crow

    @cleek: The problem is surely the word “hugged”. That’s verboten because it implies affection, friendship, empathy, or (gasp!) sexual attraction, all of which are, for obvious reasons, suspect in the Land of GOPdor.

  136. 136.

    jibeaux

    I fear that going to a gold standard isn’t enough. Suppose some future liberal scientist decides to synthesize gold just to undermine the standard again? We should ban that pre-emptively.

  137. 137.

    Midnight Marauder

    @jibeaux:

    I’m just immortalizing here, because who knows how much longer the fun will last. Not mine, btw.

    Rapists should be forced to provide proper compensation to the people they are stealing from – the fathers or husbands of the women they force themselves on. That money could then be spent by the heads of households on things that will help stimulate the economy.

    The line between spoof and reality has been forever shattered.

  138. 138.

    Ed Marshall

    The live feed of the oil leak shows mud blowing out instead of oil now. I don’t know if that is good or bad.

  139. 139.

    Xenos

    @MikeJ:

    There’s already a suggestion to repeal all the amendments.

    All the amendments? That is not crazy enough.

    How about just the ones which are prime numbers? Somebody put that up there, please, I don’t have time to get registered.

  140. 140.

    Ash Can

    “Let’s set up a state-of-the-art web site where the American people can come to us directly to tell us what we should think, what issues we should support, and what our agenda should be. What could possibly go wrong??“

  141. 141.

    Tonal Crow

    @chris: You’ve got to work on your (mis)spelling. For example, “nonsense” should be spelled “nonsence”.

  142. 142.

    MattR

    @Xenos: If somebody is taking requests, please try to post Abe Simpson’s suggestion.

    There are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three.

  143. 143.

    brendancalling

    I got three positive votes for this one:

    “i don’t understand why we have to have child labor laws. if every child over the age of 5 went to work (like they did in the OLD TIME TRADITIONAL AMERICA) we wouldn’t need to import stuff from China. MAKE THE CHILDREN PULL THEIR SHARE. “

  145. 145.

    scav

    @Xenos: seconded. Prime numbers are elitist numbers. ‘scuse me, elitist nummers. Who DO they think they are?!

  147. 147.

    MikeJ

    It’s nice to see all the goldbug spoofing, but now we need to start a turf war between the goldbugs the no one world currency people, since the gold standard leads inexorably to one world currency, then one world government, then the antichrist.

  149. 149.

    freelancer

    @Mike G:

    This one was for you:

    Holy God’s creation is perfect, and our representatives should be fighting for our values. Natural law does not inclued athiest isaac newtons “Laws” of thermodynamics. Socalled “Entropy” is a trick invented by the forces of darkness who are currently bringing this country to its knees. We need our leaders to fight for us, or else we will fight our leaders

    I made up for my lack of caps with the next one:

    Papers please for anyone online who uses an Umlaut on AND ENGLISH SPEAKING WEBSITE IN AN ENGLISH SPEAKING COUNTRY> This is AMREICA!!!

  151. 151.

    Bubblegum Tate

    OK, which one of you jokesters posted “Legalize Gay Marijuanna”[sic]? I almost snarfed my water.

  152. 152.

    jibeaux

    @Tonal Crow:

    That was also great. What I like about all this is that someone could say, “you remember when the Republicans made that website, and they were like all sincere about it, and then the liberals went to the website, and …” and you could be talking about half a dozen different things, easy.

  153. 153.

    Colonel Danite

    I don’t know when I had this much fun. I just hope I don’t get fired for spending the last 30 minutes on the site.

  154. 154.

    Crashman

    You all are doing God’s work here. Truly stupendous job; bravo. I am in awe.

  155. 155.

    Mark S.

    This one cracked me up:

    I was going to say that we should stop daylight savings time because every time it comes around I’m confused for MONTHS. But what we should REALLY do is just standardize all American Time, so there aren’t different zones. That way, I could call my brother in Louisiana in the early evening and not worry about him already being asleep because its two hours later there.

    My guess is 80% of these responses are spoofs. This thing will be shut down tomorrow.

  156. 156.

    MattR

    I thought this one was real for a second

    Here is my 5 step program for FINALLY securing our borders and protecting our children: 1 Cut funding to all secular organizations and poor people. 2 Take the savings realized over the first year to Las Vegas. 3 Find a roullette table and put the entire amount on the number 22. 4 Now take winnings to nearest bank and collect the money in crisp, $50 bills. they must be $50’s and they must be brand NEW. 5 Stitch the bills into a massive “net” and encircle our borders with it. This repelling attacks from near and afar.

  157. 157.

    Bubblegum Tate

    @Mark S.:

    This thing will be shut down tomorrow.

    Damn liberals–THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS!

  160. 160.

    b-psycho

    Apparently advocating anarchy in a faux-Palin tone is “inappropriate”, cuz they wouldn’t even let me put up this one:

    The reason government is so hard to keep track of is because it’s so big and spread out. We like majority rule & local solutions to stuff, why not just break it up & have locally run self-representation?

  161. 161.

    Souvik

    hit DougJ’s link from my work computer and got this message. I wonder what they did to get blacklisted :-)

    “This Page Cannot Be Displayed

    ——————————————————————————–

    Based on your corporate access policies, this web site ( http://www.americaspeakingout.com/browse/questions/tagged/heliocentrism ) has been blocked because it has been determined to be a security threat to your computer or the corporate network. This web site has been associated with malware/spyware. “

  164. 164.

    MagicPanda

    It looks to me like they may have (accidentally?) reverted their entire database, so your post is being rejected for a different reason (like your account may no longer exist) rather than any inappropriate words. At least that was what happened to me.

  166. 166.

    LD50

    “End Child Labor Laws,” suggests one helpful participant. “We coddle children too much. They need to spend their youth in the factories.”

    This is America: what factories??

  167. 167.

    freelancer

    Crap they deleted me. And I didn’t get to post my “Not Soft on crime diatribe”.

    I think I smelled drugs smoke coming from my neighbor’s garage. PLEASE sent the POLICE to his house to shoot his attack dogs in the middle of the night and scare his kids so they won’t enter into a life of crime. We need to take back the streets from these criminals who are ruining are society. When are Americans going to say Enough is Enough!

  168. 168.

    merl

    I’d say about 90% of the postings are spoof. I know that 100% of mine are.
    I have already won 3 freedom badges!!

  169. 169.

    JGabriel

    It looks like ALL of the responses are gone. I don’t see any responses there now, except for a couple of very recent, very banal, comments.

    Or possibly, the site database broke.

    .

  171. 171.

    Martin

    @Mr Furious: 40% chance that it won’t work. Only like a 5% chance it’ll make things worse.

    Still, worse is difficult to accept even at 5%.

  173. 173.

    Xenos

    I tried to register so I could post some of William Jennings Bryan’s ‘Cross of Gold’ speech in the Gold Standard section, but no dice. I was very curious to see if anyone would recognize it.

    Maybe I should have just updated it to Teatard-language – “Get a brain, morans bimetallists!”

  174. 174.

    dj spellchecka

    well, either the website is junk or my account “helen bedd’ got scrubbed already…probably for suggesting we raise the capital gains tax and the minimum wage…

    the website fail notice is funny, too: “A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now. Please wait a moment and try again.”

    here’s a suggestion i found under the topic of job creation
    [bonus! tagged with “first-principles”] : “We need to ensure that the Republicans never give us up, let us down, run around, or desert us.”

  176. 176.

    I have issues with Baltimore

    Looks like somebody hit the reset button. The categories are empty now, and it says my idea to “Repeal all prime-numbered amendments so brown people can’t vote to take away our guns” is inappropriate.

  178. 178.

    Martin

    @MikeJ:

    Yes! A thousand times yes! I gave my recommendation upthread. I’ll try and join in the fun later tonight.

  181. 181.

    maus

    I take it as a matter of pride that Republican politicians twitter 5x as much as their Dem opponents. While Twitter is these days a political necessity (considering how the media relies on it near-exclusively for their reporting) it’s still as unintellectual as the 10 second sound bite the media used to rely exclusively on.

  185. 185.

    licensed to kill time

    Looks like America’s not Speaking Out anymore. Why do they hate our freedoms?

  187. 187.

    daverave

    I have not laughed this hard for months… I gotta get out more of course. Anyhow.

  188. 188.

    Lisa K.

    Under healthcare, how about “make sure anybody in the emergency room shows his or her papers before receiving care”

  190. 190.

    I have issues with Baltimore

    @Mark S.: Then I guess trekking all the way across the country for some of that sweet, sweet NASA tang paid off for Herr McCarthy.

  191. 191.

    Mayken

    Y’all keep crashing the damn site! How about a little organization in your spoofery, eh? I haven’t laughed so hard in ages!

  193. 193.

    lexlurker

    Here’s a good one

    Lets be join canada and become another province. That way they can teach us how to manage our banks and budget.

    Not to mention the requirement to drill a relief well simultaneously with any offshore drilling.

  194. 194.

    EmmATX

    It’s definitely back up. I have already seen a bunch of the comments over there that y’all posted here. Keep it up!

  195. 195.

    Mayken

    This one is my current fave:

    My neighbor made a Republican website that can’t withstand more than two people posting at once, despite having “NASA technology”. Please arrest him, or at the very least, ridicule his stupid website.

    You guys rock so hard!

  197. 197.

    clussman

    The reset is okay, it lets more people get in on the fun and get their crazy ideas above the fold. Witness the current #1 from Job Creation:

    Sue Lowden was definitely on to something with her idea of bartering chickens for health care, but why not just make chickens official United States currency? Money doesn’t grow on trees, but there’s no reason it can’t grow in our CAFOs.

  198. 198.

    clussman

    Also, too:

    Let’s have every American male cut his hair like Trent Lott and get John Boehner’s artificial tan.

    Pay for more bandwidth so that real Americans can keep the good ideas coming without crashing this site.

  200. 200.

    licensed to kill time

    __

    I would like to see a river of fire built between the US and Mexico. I would also like level 12 mages to guard the border just in case.

    Mexico tag

  201. 201.

    daverave

    Thank God that the Rent-a-Boy website works better than this one.

    Please make it stop…

  202. 202.

    Zeke

    Can we please make it illegal to make fun of Sarah Palin? It’s just mean. Sure, she isn’t that smart. But she raised five kids, and only one got knocked up in high school. That used to count for something in AMREICA!

  203. 203.

    Snark Based Reality

    Abortions for some, tiny American flags for others!

    In the 20th Century as women’s roles in the work place increased so has the suffrage of women. It is time to end this vicious cycle and outlaw women’s suffrage forever.

    I think someone should investigate why Republicans aren’t posting on this website.

  204. 204.

    fucen tarmal

    ok, i am all in favor of banning rights for gays, because i believe what my pastor tells me, that it leads to beastiality. however, i think we need to make it clear, that some times, particularly in winter, it feels good to micturate in a horse, rather than expose one’s privates to the elements for the duration of the micturation. i think we should ban gay rights, but make it clear that micturating in horses is still ok, either because its cold out, or because its fun and the horse seems to like it . i micturated in a horse once, it saved me from frostbite, i don’t think we should take that right away from hard working americans.

    they have a state of the art word sensor that flags inappropriate, doesn’t know a lot of words yet, much like sarah palin.

  205. 205.

    Corpsicle

    Congratulations to all the brilliant lefties who have helped the Republican party by trolling their site.

    Instead of exposing the ignorance, racism, sexism, and various other unpleasant -isms of the current Republican party, your immature douchebaggery has enabled them to blame every stupid idea on us.

    I realize how entertaining it is to fuck with them, but keep in mind that you are helping the right, and fucking the left. But if that’s what you want, umm, congratulations, I guess.

  207. 207.

    Lisa K.

    @Corpsicle:

    Instead of exposing the ignorance, racism, sexism, and various other unpleasant -isms of the current Republican party, your immature douchebaggery has enabled them to blame every stupid idea on us

    LOL, hey, the stupidest idea was that website!

  210. 210.

    fucen tarmal

    @Corpsicle:

    yeah they can call us crude and vulgar. oh noes! by the time folks are done with it, nothing from that site will be taken seriously.

  212. 212.

    Corpsicle

    @fucen tarmal: I would prefer their site to be taken seriously. Republicans have become so completely retarded that their most sober and serious ideas expose their stupidity.

  213. 213.

    trollhattan

    Will these laughin’ tears ruin my keyboard as fast as the cryin’ ones? You guyzr killing me here.

  214. 214.

    clussman

    Damnit, @Colonel Danite beat me to the exact line I wanted to use. You can respond to most things with lines from either Stripes or Ghostbusters.

  216. 216.

    clussman

    @Corpsicle: there are plenty of other sites where their jackass ideas can be taken seriously and can’t be pinned on teh Liberal Spies. FFS let us have our fun with today’s installment of Republicans Meet Technology.

  217. 217.

    Midnight Marauder

    @Corpsicle:

    I would prefer their site to be taken seriously. Republicans have become so completely retarded that their most sober and serious ideas expose their stupidity.

    I think the argument could be made that the site is being treated with the seriousness it deserves.

    Instead of exposing the ignorance, racism, sexism, and various other unpleasant -isms of the current Republican party, your immature douchebaggery has enabled them to blame every stupid idea on us.

    Of course, no one ever said that the two sentiments are mutually exclusive.

  221. 221.

    Lisa K.

    @Corpsicle:

    I would prefer their site to be taken seriously. Republicans have become so completely retarded that their most sober and serious ideas expose their stupidity.

    Really, we knew that BEFORE they started soliciting serious policy ideas from the unwashed masses with access to IP blocking software…

  222. 222.

    Corpsicle

    @DougJ: “They would have said it was lefties doing it whether it was or not. No true conservative and all that.”

    True, but would anyone have believed them? As it is the comment section of the Washington Post article you linked to is full of Lefties laughing about how they ratfucked the site.

  225. 225.

    PurpleGirl

    @schrodinger’s cat: No, not because decimals aren’t biblical but because the numbers we use are ARABIC numbers, Muslim, developed by those dark people in the Middle East, not even ancient Greek.

    I read some of the categories and wanted to hit my head to make the pain go away.

  226. 226.

    Corpsicle

    I don’t have some sort of moral objection to screwing with them, but to be most effective ratfucking should be performed with discretion.

  227. 227.

    jl

    If ancient Hindu mathematicians invented the ancestors of the Arabic numerals, they are still bad. Hindus are Godless heathens too.

    No one has mentioned the corrupting influence of the alphabet, which is Phoenician, and the Bible says that they are bad. I will suggest, under education, that we go back to runes, which are Anglo Saxon and good.

  228. 228.

    Violet

    Their website it awful. It keeps crashing. Are Republicans really this stupid? They keep doing this kind of thing over and over.

  230. 230.

    Matthew Reid Krell

    Oh, dear:

    End the Department of Education. No federal power grants congress the authority to “legislate” education (See Constitution article 1, section 8). Education legislation is reserved to the States, or to the people. Note: Don’t refute using the “general welfare” or “necessary and proper” clauses. The enumerated powers are very specific and intentionally limiting.

    Ladies and gentlemen, Justice Thomas trolls the GOP site!

  232. 232.

    OC

    You have to read the American Values thread. It’s been hijacked to say the least. This is my favorite:

    We should require alternative theories to evoluation be taught in school. I like Norse Mythology and the Hopi story. Their is no more proof to these then to Darwins tale of molucules to man. Also, the Christians have a good theory, and snappy displays at the Creation Museum. I like to ride the dinosour (or Dragon, or Faith Lizard).

  235. 235.

    b-psycho

    It’s a dumb idea. Dumb ideas deserve ridicule.

    Besides, if people suggested good ideas it’s not like the GOP leadership would read it, say “hey, these are good ideas!” & then proceed to use them to inform legislation. If politics worked like that then legislators would be redundant.

  236. 236.

    maus

    @Violet: Duh hurrr it worked for Obama! (Not that anything in the Change.org site got implemented or carried any weight…)

    @b-psycho: Conservatism is ALL ABOUT new ideas and keeping up with both the times and the peoples’ voice, what are you talking about.

  237. 237.

    Violet

    @Lisa K.:
    Yeah, no kidding. I guess it shouldn’t come as a surprise that the party that thought the internet was a series of tubes still doesn’t understand how it works. But still….

  240. 240.

    CynDee

    OT, someone please help. (Red face.) This is embarrassing to ask, but it’s not in the lexicon and I don’t know what “Han shot first” means. I didn’t see all the Star Wars movies.

    Thank you.

  241. 241.

    Tiparillo

    All of them seem to be about going back to the gold standard….

    But my favorite was this error message:

    A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now.
    Please wait a moment and try again.

  242. 242.

    Violet

    @CynDee:
    It pertains to differences between the first Star Wars movie and the re-release. Google it – it comes right up.

  243. 243.

    DJM

    If a GOPer isn’t an asshole, he’s an idiot.
    I’m not saying that there isn’t a whole lot of overlap.

  244. 244.

    themann1086

    @CynDee: In the first movie (that is, Episode 4), Han is confronted by a bounty hunter threatening to take him in. Han (very clearly) shoots the bounty hunter; Lucas later tried to claim that Greedo shot first, but that’s just revisionist bull.

    ETA: And yeah, the “digitally remastered” version was edited so that Greedo shot first.

  245. 245.

    dmsilev

    @CynDee:

    OT, someone please help. (Red face.) This is embarrassing to ask, but it’s not in the lexicon and I don’t know what “Han shot first” means. I didn’t see all the Star Wars movies.

    In the original Star Wars movie (later retitled “Episode IV: A New Hope”), there was a scene near the beginning where Han Solo was talking in a bar with someone who wanted to collect a bounty on him. At the end of the scene, Han Solo shot Greedo (the bounty hunter) with Greedo never even drawing his own gun. Established Han as a bit of a bad-ass, and certainly cold-blooded.

    When the movies were released as “Special Editions” in the late nineties, George Lucas decided it wasn’t “hero-like” for Han to gun someone down in cold blood, so the scene was edited to have Greedo shoot first (and miss, at about a 2 foot range), and Han then returns fire. Many fans of the films object to this and prefer the original version, hence the motto “Han Shot First”.

    dms

  246. 246.

    I have issues with Baltimore

    I can’t login to my account anymore. It says it doesn’t exist, but it won’t let me re-register because it says my username is already in use. And I can still see my ideas, although the ideas about repealing the prime number amendments and somebody fixing my apartment’s plumbing so I can shower and get a job are gone. All that remains is my hatred of the Tampa Bay Rays.

  247. 247.

    gocart mozart

    Lets play Real or Spoof
    <blockquoteWe need to make the enviro-whackos trying to create a panic over the golf oil spill to shut the he!l up! OIL IS A NATURAL SUBSTANCE!!! You cook with it (vegatable oil), clean with it (lemon oil), put it on your skin (oil of olay), etcetera. GOD put it there for us to use, and anyone saying that a NATURAL SUBSTANCE is bad for NATURE either is severly misguided or diliberately lying to promote thier own SOCIALIST agenda. >

  248. 248.

    Kia

    The most troubling aspect of these posts is how many fall into the far-right wing equivalent of Poe’s Law. The parodies and trolls are indistinguishable from the more strident, honest suggestions.

  252. 252.

    EIGRP

    Here’s my favorite:

    No more tea parties with china tea cups, because China is a socialist country, and we should use American products like plastic.

    Yeah, let’s use more foreign oil!!

    Eric

  253. 253.

    gocart mozart

    This is my favorite

    “One time I saw a Mexican living in America on the television and his English was fine. I was thoroughly insulted and called an exorcist to remove the demons from my television. He never came. Sometimes, when the night is as still as a cat about to leap on its prey, I can hear the screams of the trapped heathen souls as they rattle away in their cathode ray prison. I bought some earplugs, but they were too big.”

  254. 254.

    asiangrrlMN

    I just registered and put in a random zip from MN. Guess whose district it turned out to be? Michele Bachmann’s. PERFECT! I’m orientalpearlMN, and I will be making a few suggestions in the life section. We shall see what happens.

    P.S. My favorite historical figure? The Antichrist!

  255. 255.

    asiangrrlMN

    Damn it. This was mine.

    People today have no idea what it takes to have a successful family. It’s hard work, and it has to be done consistently. Why, if you say two wetsuits and a toy of a certain nature, they just give you a blank stare. Talk to them about hiking the Appalachian Trail, taking a wide stance in the Minneapolis bathroom, or lifting a heavy load, and they have no idea as to what you are talking. This shall not stand. If we want our children to have an appropriate idea as to the values upon which this nation was built, we need to teach them the lessons of John Ensign, Mark Foley, Larry Craig, Mark Sanford, and many other heroic men who live the values they espouse.

    Except, I had dildo first. That was inappropriate. Then, I tried this. It accepted it, but did not post it. This is my latest.

    People today have no idea what it takes to have a successful family. It’s hard work, and it has to be done consistently. Why, if you say two wetsuits and a toy of a certain nature, they just give you a blank stare. Talk to them about hiking the Appalachian Trail, taking a wide stance in the Minneapolis bathroom, or lifting a heavy load, and they have no idea as to what you are talking. This shall not stand. If we want our children to have an appropriate idea as to the values upon which this nation was built, we need to teach them the lessons of John Ensign, Mark Foley, Larry Craig, Mark Sanford, and many other heroic men who live the values they espouse. Until then, we will have nothing other than hypocrites and liars in our midst.

    Nope. They won’t post it. Shit. I’ll try something blander.

    In ethics, I tried, “If you cannot walk the walk, at least you can talk the talk. Amirite?” They didn’t post that, either, damn it. I’m bored now.

  257. 257.

    EIGRP

    I have a couple to add but the site is too slow to post.

    Here they are:

    – create a litmus test that all politicians must take to prove they are Christian
    – President’s should be elected by how much red is on the map on election day. There is no way Obama could have beat McCain

    Eric

  258. 258.

    asiangrrlMN

    And, I will just say on this now dead thread that of the ones I read, I had a hard time distinguishing between real and spoofery on at least…two or three of the items!

  260. 260.

    matoko_chan

    and you guyz refuse to believe to believe in the negative correlation of IQ with conservatism.
    the whole site is a nature preserve for proud ignoramuses, and a field lab for selection for stupidity.
    quod erat demonstrandum.

  262. 262.

    Polar Bear Squares

    I’m laughing my arse off.

    If it swims in the sea, it’s a fish! Period!

    That goes for dolphins, seals, sea urchins, yo mama in a onesie.

    Traditional values!

  263. 263.

    bago

    I think any senator who helps destroy a bank or savings and loan should be expelled from the capital. 6 Total Votes

    For the grammar nerds!

  264. 264.

    Seanly

    The site looks like it was designed by the guy who used to leave his alien conspiracy theory tracts under the bridge.

  265. 265.

    ronathan richardson

    two best:

    “Sometimes I see a new food at the store, but I don’t know if I will like it, so I don’t buy it. I propose we establish “food libraries” where you can try new foods and if you like them, go to the store and stimulate the economy. Only legal U.S. citizens would be allowed in the food library.”

    “Cut taxes, cut spending, cut hair, cut the cheese, cut it out, cutlery and cuttlefish.”

  266. 266.

    daveNYC

    I would like to see a river of fire built between the US and Mexico. I would also like level 12 mages to guard the border just in case.

    Absolutely foolish, everyone knows that you’d be better off with a mixed team of Druids and Rangers.

  268. 268.

    matoko_chan

    @Lisa K.: yes.
    Think about it, 50 years of memetic fitness selection for creationists, anti-intellecutals, home-schoolers, nativists, racists, birthers, christofascists, right-to-life-warriors, homophobes, misogynists, patriarchists, neo-nazis, birchers, pre-trib fundamentalists, fake libertarians, neo-con revanchists, imperialists, soulless rapacious capitalists, and low-information voters that can be demagogued and scaremongered into voting against their economic interests.
    And America Speaking Out is the result.
    Selection for Stupid.
    Plus, they are techno-luddites, so they get pranked by mobies.
    Like when the Michael Steele site got hooked up with bondage toy links.

Comments are closed.