Are you really, really, really angry at President Obama?
If so, The Weekly Standard is here to help. The mag is selling an “Obama stress head” doll that lets you take out your rage at the President by squeezing his head in your hand.
As the mag puts it, the doll allows you to “crush those half-baked liberal ideas before they do any more damage.”
As Sargent notes, for $.99 more, you can get the collected works of Bill Kristol!
Punchy
But what do I purchase if I’m merely really, really angry at this summbitch?
Dr. Morpheus
Yet another attempt to shear the flock.
Hey, Eric Son of Eric perfected this, no?
I’m sure it will be a popular item amongst the Red State and LGF crowds.
Dr. Morpheus
Dammit! I thought I had Frist!
Face
Does it come with a fake noose and tree as well?
BruceFromOhio
Anything to make money off selling shit to rubes. That’s pretty much all the conservative movement has left going for it these days: raw, unprocessed capitalism, Ronco-style.
Senyordave
Please don’t insult 12 year olds! My niece is a 12 year old, believe me the Weekly Standard is well below the level of any reasonably mature 12 year old. My 7 year old nephew, that might be a comparison.
Mumphrey
Well, when you think about how crazy and violent some conservatives are today, I can only hope they buy these things up and pound the Obama stressheads into the ground, if it keeps them for reaching for their guns. Maybe this will let them get some of their anger out. Too bad the Weekly Standard gets to profit off of it, though…
jeffreyw
I bet professional clowns are pissed at the amateurs doing it for free.
peach flavored shampoo
$10 says the box it’s packaged in reads “Squeeze the Shady N#gger Toy”, made in Mobile, AL.
GregB
When you squeeze the head of the Bill Kristol stress doll your hands get covered with shit.
stevie314159
I’m saving up for the George W. Bush dildo, ’cause I miss getting f**ked.
fucen tarmal
we could sell the john boehner whole wheat toasters….they toast your whole wheat bread, bagels whatever, til they color match john boehner.
or the limited re-release of mao tse dongs now in designer tea rose, put the fuckin back in fucking commie pink-os
or how about a prank for all your friends, nothing says gotcha like michelle bachmann genuine imitation bat guano!. oh no, what a mess!
beltane
Some neighbors of mine used to have a Ronald Reagan dog toy for their golden retriever. They used to say, “Blue, go get the president” and Blue would fetch his little rubber Ronald Reagan. I guess these things are par for the course.
Leo Sigh
The Republicans really do get dumber. It’s no wonder they lost the White House.
What I love too is Obama’s been in office just over a year and these f**kwads think he should have already solved the mess left after EIGHT years of George Bush. How dumb do you have to be?
But, oh hey, I forgot – that’s right, the massive deficit, banking crisis and the fact that the world hates America had nothing to do with Bush. Right.
Martin
Wait, new tactic? I thought we were buying ammunition for our 2nd amendment test against not getting our way.
Cat Lady
@beltane:
Hunter Thompson had a dummy named Nixon in his house his Rottweiler tore the crotch out of every time he said “Nixon”. I only have cats or I’d do a Cheney version.
Chyron HR
Did they get Palin’s witch hunter friend to help them make their voodoo dolls?
MikeBoyScout
Will the Weekly Dullard be offering an easy bake oven for us to finish baking the half-baked ideas?
licensed to kill time
And $.99 is exactly what the collected works of Bill “Mr. Giggles” Kristol are worth.
Redshirt
This is starting to get to me. In the final days of the election of 2008, I had hopes sanity would return to the country. Alas.
I saw Rudy on my morning news show – why? – and guess what he was saying? Obama stinks.
And I marvel at the environment which – without comment – goes from 8 years of “it’s treason to criticize the President and Government” to BOOM! Overnight, “It’s treason to support the President and the Government”.
I quote:
Have they no shame? Why is this allowed to happen? I mean, it’s outrageous, yet business as usual.
General Egali Tarian Stuck
The progressive sellout model is half price.
General Egali Tarian Stuck
@General Egali Tarian Stuck: Okay, this comment was uncalled for. It was fun, but uncalled for. Free purple plastic Unicorns on the house as my penance.
fucen tarmal
@General Egali Tarian Stuck:
i want a stainless steel and granite colored plastic unicorn, for my kitchen.
robertdsc
Can we get a Tunch stress doll with optional Lecter mask?
General Egali Tarian Stuck
@fucen tarmal: Okay, but they cost eleventy hundred cents.
liberty60
@Senyordave:
When I actually was 12, in 1972, MAD Magazine had a satire of an ad about a punching bag that had Wm F Buckley’s face on one side, and Abbie Hoffman on the other, “for all political persuasions, Grandpa and Junior alike!” the ad chirpily proclaimed.
Even as a 12 year old, I saw the hilarity in that.
asiangrrlMN
@robertdsc: I would buy a hundred of those.
And, I must confess, I do have a three-pack of W., Ahhhhnold, and Hillary cat toys, but have only given two of them to the boys. This is the W. one. I believe he is currently under the couch. I have no clue what they did to the Terminator.
Joe Bauers
I usually just squeeze my boehner. It feels good, and it’s free!
Joseph Nobles
For .99 cents extra, you can crush Obama’s head with the collected works of Bill Kristol! This is while Bill Kristol is smiling.