Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

“What are Republicans afraid of?” Everything.

T R E 4 5 O N

A last alliance of elves and men. also pet photos.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

I’m sure you banged some questionable people yourself.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

Despite his magical powers, I don’t think Trump is thinking this through, to be honest.

Fuck the extremist election deniers. What’s money for if not for keeping them out of office?

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

An almost top 10,000 blog!

“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

Usually wrong but never in doubt

Republicans in disarray!

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Incompetence, fear, or corruption? why not all three?

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97Comments

  1. 1.

    David in NY

    I wish you success with your newest gadget. (As I recall, you actually liked your dandelion puller, or do I forget?) But in my eternal pessimism about gadgets, I think that, for rabbits, a fence (and it need not be much of one) is the only thing that works.

    Edit: “newest gadget” is the rabbit repeller not the composter, which will work if you don’t put too much in.

  2. 2.

    John Cole

    I’m putting up a privacy fence in a couple months so the dogs and cat can go outside (I really want Tunch to experience the outdoors), and I may just splurge and extend it around the garden area, making a garden fence excess. I am loathe to spend a couple hundred on fencing for the garden just to find it outdated a few months later. The sprinkler, however, is useful regardless.

  3. 3.

    D-Chance.

    Also, my Norpro Ceramic Compost Keeper showed up and it is the perfect size for a single person…

    OK, folks, if there are any strange disappearances in Cole’s neighborhood, we all know where to look first.

  5. 5.

    demimondian

    We used this kind of thing to combat raccoons. The only problem with is that our cats would occasionally get sprinkled until we added a timer…

  6. 6.

    gbear

    Maybe you can get a gig as a secret shopper until your interest in politics returns (& I’m not knocking that. Politics really sucks right now).

    My back yard is turning into a singles bar for Mourning Doves. I wish they’d take it home…

  8. 8.

    Keith G

    @John Cole: Buy a cat harness and a leash first.

    I did that once. My big lazy kitty got spooked climbed a fence I thought unclimbable.

    I found him walking beside a nearby road a week later as a was driving home. Talk about a tearful reunion.

  9. 9.

    Pig Tralin

    A half-dozen years ago, I remember reading a post some guy put up about how he built a motion-activated hose to spray kids who cut through his yard. In order to keep from getting in trouble, he kept referring to the kids as “rabbits”.

  11. 11.

    inkadu

    @Keith G: I used to have a wire grid fence. The cat couldn’t climb it, but it sure could climb the trees next to it. I didn’t find out until I brought a stray dog home for the night while waiting for the pound to open in the morning. Fortunately, the cat had the good sense to land back in the yard instead of jumping onto the strip of grass next to a busy highway on the other side of the fence.

    Glad you got your kitty back.

  12. 12.

    Morbo

    @Keith G:

    Buy a cat harness and a leash first.

    John Cole will get a chance to test his assertion that all the stories of Tunch planning to murder him are tongue in cheek.

  14. 14.

    inkadu

    Keep cats from using your garden as a litter box or prevent raccoons and herons from snacking in your fish pond.

    I’d have a fish pond just to watch the herons eat ’em.

  15. 15.

    Jennifer

    And, re: the bunny problem: my kitty is on a mission to wipe them out in our neighborhood – probably more effective than a sprinkler, though not as humane. One of them DID get a piece of her though…apparently it bit or scratched her on the lower lip…that one got away; I saw it go down. As I told her, “Eartha, sometimes the bunnies bite back.”

  16. 16.

    Mark S.

    How many times will John forget to turn the thing off before he goes to do some gardening?

  18. 18.

    southpaw

    Uh, John, the dogs are going to have a merry old time with that composter. Maybe invest in a rubber mat with some drainage to put it on?

  19. 19.

    QuaintIrene

    Sounds promising. And what also sounds good, your birthday menu a post or two back. With all the political posts today, I’m glad you’re doing something else than raising your blood pressure.
    But maybe you are enjoying yourself.

  20. 20.

    sukabi

    you’re in luck… according to the pic’s not only will it keep dogs, cats, kids and deer out of your garden, it will also banish the pope.

  21. 21.

    Kathi

    Oooh! I used to have a Scarecrow. It worked for deer and the stray cats in the neighborhood but the rabbits & groundhogs laughed at it.

  23. 23.

    Kirk Spencer

    You’re probably not going to like that composter. The handle has a tendency to come off. It’s not really a composter either; it’s a large tote meant to let you can take stuff to your compost pile once every few days instead of every single day. Unfortunately, since it’s ceramic it’s not an airtight seal, which tends to balance the carbon filter for odor control. There’ve been some comments about the ceramic chipping as well.

    Personally, I use a plastic ice cream bucket — one of the two gallon plastic buckets with a sealing lid — and take out my waste every evening. Yes, it’s not as pretty. On the other hand I don’t have odors or fruit flies.

  25. 25.

    Josie

    If you want the fence to keep Tunch in, you need to add some like this:
    http://www.catfencein.com/ because a fence won’t work for a cat. I have an 8 foot wood fence and one of my kitties got scared and cleared it. I never saw him again. There are several companies who make these or you can do it yourself if you are handy. The cat fence needs to slant inward and be well supported.

  26. 26.

    geg6

    I’m sceptical that a little shower will deter any self respecting rabbits. I know it wouldn’t work with the rabbits around here. And the deer would laugh their asses off at it. And I live in not-the-backwoods-but-close SW PA. Where you live, Cole, I’ d imagine the wildlife is even more disdainful of such pitiful human technology. My John and I are firm believers in our sunken garden with a quadruple wire fence. Keeps everything but humans out.

    And yay! My electricity just came back on!

  29. 29.

    jl

    Maybe Cole can train Tunch to amble over to the rabbits, lie down on top of them and take a nap.

  31. 31.

    kommrade reproductive vigor

    Can’t you stake the dogs out in the yard every so often? That will keep everything from rabbits to deer out. Proper fencing can be a bitch because you’ll have to sink it deep enough to keep things from digging under.

    Oh well, I look forward to the post in which Cole tells us he got all fancied up to go out on the town only to get bwasted by the sprinkler.

  33. 33.

    jharp

    “I think my rabbit problem has just been solved: Motion-Activated Sprinkler.”

    Not a chance.

    You underestimate the bunny. They’ve been around a long, long, long, time. And you think a little rain shower is going to keep them away? Seriously?

  34. 34.

    The Dangerman

    Well, sure, that would be effective for rabbits…

    …after they are caught, skinned, and cooked. Based on available evidence, I’m thinking 2 or 3 at a time.

  35. 35.

    CaseyL

    @John Cole:

    I really want Tunch to experience the outdoors

    Omigawd, you mean he’s never been outside? Ever?

    He will go bonkers, esp if it’s windy. Even cats used to being outside go nuts then, because the wind brings so many scents and noises from far away. He’ll have sensory overload, get the Kitty Crazies, and try to run in all directions at once. Please make sure the yard is not only fenced, but fenced in a way that he can’t climb over.

    And if you have trees, or a way up onto the roof, be prepared to have to get him down from someplace.

    Oh, I would give good money to be there on Tunch’s First Day Out. You gotta film it, and then post the movie. Please please please.

    ETS: Wait a minute: Tunch *has* been outside, I remember now. He got out accidentally, and you were frantic. Did he enjoy his brief escape?

  37. 37.

    Chat Noir (iPhone)

    Tunch is so cool.

    Waiting for J. Buffett to come on stage in Clarkston, MI. Whatever.

  39. 39.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    I swear Tunch’s tail never fails to set me a giggling, it looks like he lost his original one and had to sign a new one out from stores that didn’t match. “No I need a white one” Stores assistant “sorry that’s all we got gov, take it or leave it” “but its Orange and I am white, it will look stupid” Stores assistant “well its that or nothing, so what’s it to be?” I see Tunch walking away from stores sighing dragging the tail behind him. “They are really going to piss themselves laughing at me at divisions” It cracks me up every time I see it.

  40. 40.

    Michael D.

    Good to see the compost-types here. We practically recycle and compost everything here. We haven’t put trash out here in nearly 2 months.

  41. 41.

    Perry Como

    You’d think this would be effective against wabbits:

    It looks like Tunch has consumed a number of rabbits. Whole.

  44. 44.

    demimondian

    Tunch would be very useful against rabbits — if they’d sit still long enough for you to drop him on them.

    Otherwise…yeah, no, not so much.

  46. 46.

    ondioline

    If that fucker Obama doesn’t grow some stones (one? a single stone?) he’s gonna be a one-termer, and we’re gonna get Prazdant Haley Barbour or Prazdant Jim DeMint.

    Jesus fuck, he’s the biggest spineless pussy of all-time.

    SORRY! VENTING!

  49. 49.

    ronathan richardson

    Make sure you check the customer images on that Amazon link, it is the internets at their best.

  50. 50.

    Tank Hueco

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    For some reason it always struck me as if there were an orange cat stuffed into him, like a Turducken, but they couldn’t fit the tail in.

  51. 51.

    ondioline

    More on-topic, that picture above is clever in how it is actually of a half-dozen cats but makes it look like only one giant Voltron cat.

    Neat!

  55. 55.

    Mnemosyne

    @slag:

    When our late kitty Natasha was annoyed with us, she would follow us from room to room so she could pointedly turn her back and ignore us. With ears tilted backwards, of course, so she could make sure we were properly chastened.

  64. 64.

    jnfr

    I have a rabbit in my back yard right now – my fenced back yard. It’s the first rabbit that’s gotten in, and we’ve lived here since 1998. I can’t seem to get it to leave. I am distressed.

    We have lots of bushes and vines it keeps hiding in, but I’ve just planted out my veggies and I DO NOT WANT rabbit in my garden! The bindweed is bad enough.

    What to do, what to do?

  66. 66.

    You Don't Say

    I hope Tunch and Lily/Rosie are going to enjoy the outdoors at separate times. The dogs may view Tunch very differently once they’re all outside.

    And I agree with previous posts about indoor cats acting very strangely outside, jumping fences and the like.

  70. 70.

    jl

    The delusional John Cole said:

    “so the … cat can go outside (I really want Tunch to experience the outdoors)”

    I predict that Tunch will experience the outdoors by sitting on the stoop within close sniffing distance of the food bowl when he feels like it, and nothing more.

    Everyone please note the date and time of my outlandish and startling prediction. You all will be amazed and surprised.

  72. 72.

    Svensker

    @CaseyL:

    He will go bonkers, esp if it’s windy. Even cats used to being outside go nuts then,

    Had a beautiful old Siamese that I adopted when she was quite mature and she’d never been outside. She was so funny — she was convinced the grass could be dangerous so she tried to walk on her tippy toes. She finally got to like it but I could never get her to poo outside — she’d come scratch at the door and be frantic to get inside to her litter box. Wonderful kitty. She also craved canteloupe, would just go crazy for it. Ah, I miss her.

  73. 73.

    James in WA

    I use two of those things to keep the deer out of my garden — they really work well, John. The main drawback is that when it’s windy, the moving trees will activate the sprinklers every 8 seconds.

    I love hearing these things go off in the morning, knowing that I’ve just denied the deer another breakfast!

  76. 76.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    @You Don’t Say:

    Perxactly! My boxers will not bother my cats indoors, sniff the occasional butt, put up with the occasional licking, and sniffing. When they are outside it is a different matter. “Any cat who ventures into the back yard is fair game” is their rule of thumb. So if said cat is caught in the backyard when I let them out there after I get back from work, then they better have their sprint on. (which of course they do).

  80. 80.

    capmarine

    backside too big to be effective against any critters other than his sleeping enabler.

  81. 81.

    capmarine

    backside too big to be effective against any critters other than his sleeping enabler.

  83. 83.

    PeakVT

    You’d think this would be effective against wabbits.

    I think a JRT would be a better choice of anti-rabbit weapons.

  84. 84.

    Restrung

    (I searched BJ for “Rundgren” before I commented)

    I think I called TR an asshole in 1988, but not on a blog. And not to his face… pretty sure that was someone else. What a jerk. :)

    @Cat Lady– still awesome!

  85. 85.

    sputnikgayle

    Mr. Cole, a fence around the garden will not only keep bunnies and other varmints out but will also serve as another surface for climbing plants to attach to (cukes, pole beans, squash). It really would increase your harvest. The varmints may nibble on the vines that grow outside the fence but you will be able to push the vines and produce inside the fence as they grow and flower. Training the vines is one of those mindless, easy tasks that I do daily and I find it to be soothing.

    We started with chicken wire but now use field fencing and it has held up very well. We initially used cedar posts that we cut from our forest but switched to metal posts when we noticed ants just loved the cedar.

  91. 91.

    Yutsano

    @burnspbesq: As the ex of a very awesome defenceman who probably didn’t get into the NHL because of his sexual orientation, this makes me haz a very big happy. I have zero doubt he would have been the first out player in the NHL. Granted I’m biased, but the Avalanche don’t fly you down to skate because you’re a slouch on the ice. As you said though, one step at a time.

    Oh and thanks to your encouragement, I have an interview and test with the IRS on Thursday. And considering the paperwork they’re asking me to fill out, I’m wondering if this may just be a formality.

  93. 93.

    Sarcastro

    Fat indoor cat ain’t never gonna run down a rabbit. Well, unless its a fat indoor rabbit.

    I’ve only seen two cats in my life that were regularly successful at hunting adult rabbits and they were both nordic-type cats; a Maine Coon and a Norwegian Forrest Cat. Great hunters. Get one if you don’t want rabbits in your yard. Or mice. Or squirrels, rats, chipmunks, birds, snakes, large insects or small dogs.

  95. 95.

    John Cole

    @Tracey Robertson: That is a very generous offer, but I will buy it. First, I believe in paying for good products so that the producers keep making them and innovating, second, because I really am uncomfortable receiving something from a corporation. I accept books to review, but I think this would cross a boundary.

    But again, thank you for your offer! And I’ll post pics when I have it up and working.

  97. 97.

    asiangrrlMN

    TUNCHIE! Cole, you seem to post more pics of Tunch when I’m not around. Hmmmmm….

    @Mnemosyne: My Shadow does that to me when he is displeased that I am not sharing my noms with me. He will sit on my CPU, his back to me, his ears pointed at me, and then he will deliberately groom himself.

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