The National Tea Party Unity Convention is moving from July 15-17 to October for a number of bullshit reasons that obscure the real one — apparently, nobody wanted to come.
Leave it to CNN to dutifully transcribe the bullshit reasons without applying one bit of skepticism. Here’s a good one:
“The heat in Las Vegas in July is keeping many who would like to participate from attending. We have also received numerous emails from people who were forced to decide between family vacations and attending the convention,” adds Phillips.
Wait — You’re telling me that Vegas is hot in July and people take vacations in the Summer? Hoocoodanode!
(via)
maya
Well, actually, Halloween would be the appropriate time for baggers to trick or treat.
dmsilev
Yes, because canceling a convention two weeks prior is done *all the time*.
Wonder how much hard-earned teabagger cash went to paying off the penalty fees from the hotel(s)?
dms
Xecky Gilchrist
Well, at least this way when Sarah Palin blows off showing up, nobody will notice.
Rick Massimo
And no one would ever go to the convention as part of a family vacation. I mean, saving the country from tyranny is cool and all, but the Grand Canyon isn’t going to be there forever.
Joshua Norton
Moving it to October makes sense. That way their weird convention drag can double as Halloween costumes.
Bob L
They think October in the South West is going to be cooler?
Mike in NC
For the teabaggers, the old saying applies: “It’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity”
Redshirt
You’ve got it all wrong. In fact, turnout was too good, too many people responded, and as everyone knows, Vegas does not have a lot of extra Convention Hall space. Alas!
Thus, the rescheduling.
Zifnab
“If you like how we run our conventions, you’ll love how we run your government!”
~ Tea Party ’10
Although, this may finally answer the question, “What happens if the right wing planned a national a hissy fit and nobody showed?”
bkny
uh, i do believe the vegas convention centers have air conditioning… besides, it’s not like there would be time for gambling, er, sightseeing, what with the demands on time when you’re saving the republic from the socialistmooslimkenyan occupier in the WHITE house.
Ruckus
@Mike in NC:
“It’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity”
Another new rotating tag
I wonder how many teabaggers would argue that you’re wrong about that?
Spaghetti Lee
It will obviously be colder in October, an ingenious way to prove that Al Gore is fat.
KG
The July heat in Vegas is keeping people from attending? That’s the best they can do?
For fuck’s sake, I’m 32 years old, I live in Southern California and have been making regular pilgrimages to Vegas for… let’s see, carry the one… about 32 years. The place is packed in July. Everyone goes in July and they spend a lot of their time at the pool. The place is also packed at New Years, for Memorial Day, Labor Day, and well, just about any other holiday you can think of.
I at least hope the reporter was laughing his/her ass off as they were writing this story.
QuaintIrene
Do they think that moving to closer to Nov. will somehow influence the
elections?
Yup, that worked out well with the Repub. convention in Sept. 2008.
licensed to kill time
Gosh, the dedication and tenacity of teabaggers is awesome to behold. When the very nation is in peril from that Kenyan usurper, where are they gonna go? Disney World!
Violet
I found the conference website. As usual, these people’s words don’t even make sense. No wonder Sarah Palin is their patron saint:
Huh?
And:
They’re going to bolster Las Vegas’s esteem!
General Egali Tarian Stuck
Hot summers end, idiots are forever.
El Tiburon
I hope that Motel 6 on the edge of town can recover from losing such a gathering.
Xecky Gilchrist
@Violet: We too, are a result of the present situation the government has put us in as a residue of what the entire country is feeling.
Wow – feed your head with word salad!
I just can’t figure out why Stupid Anger isn’t a bigger draw. How can this convention be failing?
Violet
Breitbart was going to be a featured speaker and he wasn’t put off by the heat:
Is he going to cancel on them now that he won’t be able to go the hottest place in the world in the peak of the Summer?
QuaintIrene
“We won’t even take responsibility for our own creation. It’s always somebody else’s fault.”
ellaesther
As a former reporter, I will say that it was always my greatest joy when the people before me uttered such explicit nonsense that all I had to do to point it out as nonsense was to run it un-touched.
Like when some woman was talking in a loving tone about fascist, uber-racist Rabbi Meir Kahana and used the words “of blessed memory” — she just hung herself, with no help from me.
Bex
Maybe what they’re saying about the heat is true. Most of the attendees would have been over eighty, overweight and overmedicated.
Sister Machine Gun of Quiet Harmony
@Mike in NC:
FTW!!!
Violet
Also, too:
Their intent is to gain the greatest momentum? Momentum is a goal?
Again, huh?
This really is just word salad with wingnut buzzwords sprinkled in randomly. Like:
American Flag! Patriots! Military! Nevermind the rest of the words.
licensed to kill time
@Violet:
That website is like a bingo ball cage full of haphazardly tossed together buzzwords set on top spin.
jrg
So, the same fuckers that don’t know it’s going to be hot in July in Las Vegas are going to stop “wasteful” government spending? That’s rich.
fucen tarmal
when life is too hot for tea, make lemonade.
seriously, don’t they think the beatified founding fathers were sweating balls in them get-ups they were wearing in philly? now i know asphalt wasn’t around then and philly ain’t vegas, but it aint like adams and jefferson were wearing madras shorts and flip-flops. the more practical point of how a “grass roots” org can settle on a message and then organize and distribute it amongst their non-digital networks, goes unconsidered. what a bunch of pussies, betsy ross was pulling pork throughout the continental congress and she never complained that her taintsweat was causing the kind of chafing that keeps a independent woman of the late 1700’s up sewing all night.
Bill Murray
@KG: I heard nobody goes to Vegas anymore because it’s too crowded
Violet
@licensed to kill time:
Yep. And they must have had some money at some point, because their speakers list included: Laura Ingraham, Lou Dobbs (headline speaker), and Andrew Breitbart. Would all those folks waive their speaking fees for the teabagging convention?
steve
I have had some limited involvement with convention planning. There is no way in hell you’d cancel a convention that is two weeks away unless it’s going to be a catastrophic, money-hemorraging, mortifyingly humiliating disaster. Just no way. The logistical and financial repercussions of canceling, moving, or rescheduling a convention are huge. Saying that it’s too hot and that people are taking family vacations is a bald-faced lie; CNN is either stunningly gullible or thinks that the lie is so obvious it doesn’t need to be pointed out.
fucen tarmal
@Violet:
not if they are good teabaggers…
mistermix
@Bex: I wouldn’t have made the comment about CNN’s credulous transcription if this had been a straight news story. But it was reported on the CNN political ticker blog, by someone who is an “Assistant Political Director”, so I was thinking that he could call bullshit on obvious bullshit.
gwangung
That puts you ten up on the teabaggers.
Zifnab
@jrg: These are the same yahoos that complained the subways in New York and the buses in D.C. weren’t fast enough or well maintained.
“The food is so horrible, and the portions are so small!”
They don’t want a government. They want tax cuts and circuses. I wish we could just give it to them and make them go away. It would be cheaper and easier than fending off the hordes of stupid every two years as they stampede the polls.
Joshua Norton
There is no way in hell you’d cancel a convention that is two weeks away
If you’ve signed contracts and gone past the cancellation date, there’s no way in hell you could cancel 6 months in advance. Someone is losing a butt-load of cash since conference rooms have to be booked, deposits paid in advance and guaranteed blocks of rooms have to be reserved ahead of time or you pay a penalty.
twiffer
that’s right. we couldn’t expect people to have a convention double as a family vacation. that would make it harder to slip off to a brothel.
Tom65
Obviously there wouldn’t be enough electricity to power the air conditioning AND the massive fleet of mobility scooters such a convention would bring.
Mark S.
No one could have predicted . . .
how hot Vegas is in July.
nitpicker
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Thomas Jefferson would have loved these guys.
General Egali Tarian Stuck
Sounds like there is not a dimes worth of difference between republicans and the tea party mindset. It’s full metal asshollery, all day, every day.
Classy, Senator Sessions. Impish Cracker in a suit.
beltane
Teabaggers have families who want to go on vacation with them? I call bullshit.
MikeBoyScout
They’re confused.
It is not the hot sun in Las Vegas in July that burns.
It’s the stupid that burns, and it burns teabaggers year round.
Martin
This theory of social anosognosia is starting to sound better and better.
RSR
Must be only the strong liberals attending the Netroots Nation in Las Vegas (July 22-25) who can handle the heat.
And of course we have time to attend since none of us actually work and we don’t have families (alternative lifestyles, wink, wink) with whom to vacation.
Comrade Colette Collaboratrice
Online Teabagger Poll! Should we:
1. Burn out?
2. Fade away?
3. Drool and flail?
Vote Now! Text “DUH” to 00000.
MikeJ
@fucen tarmal:
Sit down, John! Sit down, John!
For God’s sake, John, sit down!
Sit down, John! Sit down, John!
For God’s sake, John, sit down!
Someone oughta open up a window!
It’s ninety degrees! Have mercy, John, please
It’s hot as hell in Philadephia!
RSR
also, too: what did Dave Weigel know and when did he know it?
Kyle
@dmsilev:
But those are private companies. Teabaggers consider it patriotic to be ripped off hundreds of dollars for corporate profits, so long as not a penny goes directly to the government.
Brachiator
@Violet:
Yeah, it’s Newton’s Eighth law, regarding the Conservation of Gasbags in Motion.
Comrade Mary
So is this where we share our favourite lemonade recipes? I like this one.
John PM
@fucen tarmal: #28.
And let’s not forget the recurrent malaria outbreaks that the founding fathers had to deal with in Philadelphia. I guess that means the Teabagger convention also cannot be held during cold and flu season.
thingsbreak
Dave Weigel will probably have some good insights on this story over at WaPo.
Oh, right…
Bob
Will some news organization investigate, discover some numbers. Oh, like refunds issued by the hotels hosting the Tea convention. I’ve never attended any sort of convention but my understanding is that certain hotels work with convention organizers. My point, it would not be an impossible task to contact the few hotels working with the tea folk. See how many rooms were booked.
Svensker
@Comrade Colette Collaboratrice:
3. My my hey hey.
PurpleGirl
@MikeJ: That song was also my response to fucen’s comment. Will someone open up a window…
JenJen
@Mike in NC:
Damn you, Mike in NC!! Beat me to it. :-)
@MikeJ: Something tells me Show Tunes won’t appeal to this crowd. But? Loves it!!
trollhattan
@steve:
Is it wrong of me to envision some casino goombahs doing a Nancy Kerrigan on the teabag conference team, “encouraging” dem to re-book dere little event…or else? Free ‘n easy markets, bitchez.
mm
Speaking of Netroots Nation (which is the following week in Las Vegas) there has to be a parallel Republican gathering also in Las Vegas so that C-SPAN has to split coverage between the two conventions. (Just like last year in Pittsburgh and the previous year in Austin).
And that would be another example of the wonderful planning abilities of the teabaggers.
Mnemosyne
@MikeJ:
G makes me watch that damn movie every 4th of July, claiming it’s the greatest musical ever written about the signing of the Declaration of Independence. I try to point out that it’s the only musical about the signing of the Declaration of Independence for good reason, but it doesn’t make any difference.
handy
But it’s a dry heat!
Mike G
@Tom65:
Methinks the casino owners took one look at the obesity of teabagger trash and cancelled to avoid losing million of dollars on their buffets.
Calouste
The other possibility of course is that the organization didn’t actually book anything so they don’t have to pay any penalties to hotels and conventions centers. We’ll see in october if there actually is a convention and if attendees are getting their money back.
Mark S.
@thingsbreak: @Bob:
Oh for heaven’s sakes! That’s not what real reporters do.
/snark
PurpleGirl
@Bob: From my experience with science fiction and Star Trek conventions, the individuals who booked sleeping rooms are probably within the two week period when they can cancel a room without penalty. The convention space on the other hand… huge penalties and, I have to wonder, what premium is being demanded to rebook for October.
Martin
@Comrade Mary: That’s the recipe we use. The meyer lemon tree in the yard is currently putting out enough lemons for a half gallon per week, year round.
I usually stretch that out further by consuming it ¼ lemonade, ¾ fresh brewed iced tea. It’s pretty much what keeps me going.
Ash Can
But but but the Teabaggers were going to be the force that swept the GOP back into power in Congress in November! I know because Lou Dobbs and Rick Santelli said so!
Seriously, I agree that it had to be dire circumstances to make these useless boobs postpone the convention, and you can be sure they’re blowing a shit-ton of money by doing this. Good for them.
@thingsbreak: I’m betting he’ll have a commentary up on this somewhere in the near future.
gwangung
@Calouste: Either way, clown shoes galore.
Brachiator
@Svensker:
Always better to burnout than fade away. Thus hath the word been put down, from Buddy Holly to Neil Young.
Also, a tea bagger, like rust, never sleeps.
kommrade reproductive vigor
This post and the comments are 110% win.
@Violet: Um. Yeah. I know a couple of schizophrenics and at least they have an excuse for writing that way.
Jesus breakdancing Christ.
Ash Can
@Calouste: You have a point. Maybe it was actually just a dozen or so nitwits agreeing to get together three mornings in a row at one of the corner tables at Denny’s, they were all sharing a couple of rooms at the Motel 6, and they were just talking out their asses about all the rest.
Bubblegum Tate
@Violet:
It sounds like a poor Japanese-to-English translation.
WereBear
@Mnemosyne: Our SO’s must have been separated at birth. Mr. WereBear lurves that movie.
Perhaps, it is somehow a Manly Musical?
Bob
@Mark S.: I know Mark, something, the Devil,? made me write that crap.
Help me Jebus!
scav
These are the times that try men’s souls. The summertime soldier and the sunshine patriot will in this crisis, shrink from the service of his country; but he that stands it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. —Thomas Paine
mmm, flunked another season. We’ve wandered into Goldilocks territory here: this season is too hot to be self-indulgently patriotic in, this time is too cold. . .
PurpleGirl
Also, the important number isn’t the number of rooms booked so far, but the number of rooms the conference hosts said they could fill. The hotel usually only gives that many rooms the preferential room rate, people registering late get to pay the regular room rate.
General Egali Tarian Stuck
@Martin:
Wish I had one in my front yard.
Lemon Tree Very Pretty
Martin
@General Egali Tarian Stuck: One of the first things we planted at the new house. I can’t imagine not having use for more lemons.
Allan
This story was a lot funnier last time, when they were called PUMAs.
General Egali Tarian Stuck
@Martin: Too cold here in the winter, especially at night. It rarely gets below 20 degrees, but gets close to it about every night. Too much elevation. I had some dwarf fruit trees growing in the spare bedroom, and nurtured them for about three years, and it took a fair amount of tweaking the soil over PH and such. I must have done something wrong cause they all died one spring.
Violet
@Allan:
Bwahahaha. I’d forgotten about the Great PUMA Convention of ’08.
trollhattan
Are there really more than a couple thousand baggers, total, creating all this media fluff? I don’t think so, not really. Out of curiosity I checked the local meetup.com site to see where the mighty teabag nation stands in a metro area of a couple million:
11 members
The local “tea” group that meets to drink tea has 45, while the libertarians have managed 141 (I presume they meet individually and fight over who does the minutes).
The chihuahua group has 555.
The skeptics reeled in 215, the pagans 297.
Drum circle is quite popular at 414 and urban backyard poultry a respectible 83.
The Barony of Thor’s Refuge has managed a whoppng 221 and the Magickal Green Witch Vegan Celtic Wiccan Shaman Awakenings counts 67 members who presumably can remember the name on command.
So the
nextfirst time some bagger tells me they’re the up-and-coming thing, I’m telling them the Magickal Green Witch Vegan Celtic Wiccan Shaman Awakenings is kicking their pasty, Social Security banking asses six to one.kay
Well, it’s 399 dollars. 125 dollars if you just go for a day.
Topics include:
Grassroots on the Ground
Combating Charges of Racism
How to Coordinate Patriot Groups With a Statewide Communications Network
Threat of EMP Attack on the Continental US. A Case Study of a Gov’t Which Has Failed to Prepare
OBAMA-NOMICS, Unconstitutional Theft of Taxpayer Wealth
How to Raise $50,000 in 90 Days for Your Tea Party Group
Fighting Obama Secrecy-How to Get Records the Government is Hiding
Precinct Organizing
Fair Tax
A Tea Partier’s Guide to Saul Alinsky’s “Rules for Radicals”
Youth Involvement-Attracting and Keeping Young Activists in the TPM
Community Organizing in Your Area
Women in the Tea Party Movement
How to do Voter Registration Drives and Where to Find OUR Voters
Harnessing the Power of Social Media to Save Our Nation. Ning, Facebook & Twitter to the Rescue
Winning Strategy Against the Left: Bring the Asian-Americans into the Tea Party Movement
Developing Media Platforms With a Capital Focus Approach While Building Your Brand
I would sign up for this one: Threat of EMP Attack on the Continental US. A Case Study of a Gov’t Which Has Failed to Prepare.
Although this is very tempting: Combating Charges of Racism
Catsy
@steve:
This.
I too have been involved with a number of cons over the years, and this is just not done. For those who recognize the names, try to imagine what kind of credibility (and penalties) it would cost, say, NorWesCon or Dragon*Con to pull this kind of stunt two weeks out.
For anyone who is even peripherally involved with convention planning or the hotel industry, this is a gigantic alarm that screams, “WE ARE UNRELIABLE, DON’T RISK YOUR MONEY ON US, WE FAIL AT LIFE.”
Just Some Fuckhead
@Violet:
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
General Egali Tarian Stuck
@kay:
Oh Kay, there is no way to prepare for Ego Maniacal Puppeteers. If they attack, just bend over and kiss your ass goodbye. The End.
kay
I’d have to go to this one first, I guess:
Bubblegum Tate
@kay:
Oooooh! Is it by stuffing envelopes? Amway? Pyramid scheme?
It’s the totally ‘Murrican version of community organizing, which is only done by SOSHULISTS!
kay
@General Egali Tarian Stuck:
I looked it up. It’s huge with them. They’re having a whole convention just on electromagnetic pulse attacks, with Mike Huckabee as the key-note speaker, in New York.
September. That’s like the prerequisite for the October Nevada class.
This is getting complicated.
Randy P
@Catsy: It can be done however. I was at a legitimately-moved convention a few years ago, held in San Francisco in October. They’d originally planned to have it in New Orleans, but then a little incident called “Katrina” happened.
This was a big convention, too, spread across several hotels. An amazing logistical feat.
bemused
@Violet:
They have to be writing down just exactly what is floating around in their heads which is pretty scary. I’m glad I’m not a mind reader. It would be hazardous to one’s mental heath to be around those folks for too long.
fbihop
On the bright side, Right Online is still going on in Las Vegas.
Ash Can
@Randy P: This non-convention must be the teabaggers’ Katrina, then.
bemused
Question on the lemonade…is it better to buy organic lemons vs supermarket lemons? I am wondering about possible pesticides & whatall in the rinds when making zest.
slightly_peeved
I’d say there are some big differences between Dragon*Con and this.
One of them is frequented entirely by socially inept basement-dwellers who like to escape the mundanity of their normal lives by playing at warriors and heroes.
The other is Dragon*Con.
General Egali Tarian Stuck
@kay: Doesn’t surprise me. They in part justified a stupid war based on the possibility Saddam would launch toy airplane attacks from boats near the east coast laden with poison this or that and wipe out the eastern seaboard. The only thing the wingnuts don’t fear are those things they have yet to think of.
Wile E. Quixote
@ellaesther:
Yeah, but didn’t you ever want to kick them while they were down?
Dee Loralei
@slightly_peeved: LOL you win 1 internet dude. Sounds a lot like John Rogers riff on LOTR and Atlas Shrugs, well done sir!
Jay in Oregon
@slightly_peeved:
I bow to the master. That was excellent.
Just Some Fuckhead
@bemused:
Pick yer poison. No one gets out alive.
Ken
@licensed to kill time: A line I rather like, from Greg Egan’s Teranesia: “They sounded like two badly-programmed AIs trying to convince each other they were human.”
Ahasuerus
@nitpicker: Informative post, thank you.
Andre
What if they had a revolution and nobody showed up?
slightly_peeved
@Dee Loralei:
That riff was kind of the model :). Thanks!
SiubhanDuinne
@JenJen, MikeJ: I’m another who loves show tunes.
::thinks for a minute::
*Some* show tunes.
SiubhanDuinne
@General Egali Tarian Stuck #77:
Now you’ve done it. I love that song, but it’s a natural earworm. I’m going to wake up at 3 ayem with Lemon Tree going round and round in my brain, and it’ll be All. Your. Fault.
P.S. Hey to Charlie. *He* doesn’t give me earworms.
General Egali Tarian Stuck
@SiubhanDuinne:
And the Lemon Flower is Sweet. Charlie said hey back:)
Svensker
@bemused:
Pretty much what JSF said. Organic is always better, but… Whatever works for you.
SiubhanDuinne
@Kay #83:
I don’t think it’ll be all that interesting. The panellists agree that the best way to combat charges of racism is to yell “AmNotAmNotAmNot!” over and over again.
SiubhanDuinne
@Kay #83:
I don’t think it’ll be all that interesting. The panellists agree that the best way to combat charges of racism is to yell “AmNotAmNotAmNot!” over and over again.
Makes for some compelling TV, but you don’t need to spend an hour in a meeting room for that advice when you could be playing the slots.
Restrung
I’d like to endorse nitpicker’s post too. Fun stuff.
nitpicker.blogspot.com/2010/06/tea-partiers-v-thomas-jefferson.html
SiubhanDuinne
@Gen. ETS #107:
But the Fruit of the Poor Lemon
Is Impossible to Eat.
Now I feel like Harry Belafonte. Or Peter Paul and Mary. Or the Brothers Four (anybody around these parts remember the Brothers Four?)
Curse you, General Stuck.
Yes, and your little dog too!
(Wait, what am I saying? Come back, Charlie . . . )
Anne Laurie
@Calouste:
Hmm… I remember a rather major sf convention, some years ago, that almost had to be re-scheduled because it turned out the con committee hadn’t gotten around to signing the hotel contracts. So, a couple weeks before Date Zero, the hotel called them up and said, okay, now it’s gonna cost ya a healthy extra “premium” if you still want all those spaces, hahahaha. I wonder if the TBN committee ran into similar paperwork problems?
In any event, if we still had actual reporters working in this country, Following The Money would be a very, very interesting story. Maybe Dave Weigel has some free time on his hands?
fucen tarmal
@MikeJ:
see, a little musical theater in the real american curriculum could have helped the wingnuts out.
frosty
@slightly_peeved: Oh, man, I could see that one coming, starting as a distant smear of dust on the horizon, and I still LOL’d.
Nellcote
Sunshine Patriots is a very good alt. name for the teabaggers.
LD50
The teabaggers peaked last winter when they failed to block health care reform even after the hundreds of man hours they spent calling black congressmen ‘niggers’. They’re a spent force.
I think the bottom line is, it took a lot of astroturfing donations to keep them afloat as long as they were, and I suspect their big donors have just given up on them this year. Rightwing billionaires don’t like just throwing money away.
LD50
@Ruckus:
It’s not the heat, it’s the cupidity.
Yutsano
@kay:
ZOMG!! They’re coming after my wifey! Dear you have your in to
soak the rubesexpress your true inner teabagger and start making Bible Spice bucks!asiangrrlMN
@Yutsano: Holy shit! Yeah! I’m gonna be riiiiiiiich, bay-bee! Then I can cover you in truffle oil and lobster. Man. This is almost too good an opportunity. If they REALLY want Asian Americans, then a penitent Asian American bi female with tats should be right up their alley! And, I have enough bosom to give the male pundits starbursts out their assholes! Where do I sign up?
@SiubhanDuinne: Me, too. I’m more into newer musicals, though.
Batocchio
Umm, Netroots Nation is meeting in Vegas this year in late July… But the teabaggers don’t have the numbers, I guess…
Bulworth
@KG: Vegas is too crowded. Nobody goes there anymore.
Woodrowfan
In 2009 the AHA (American Historical Association) held it’s annual meeting in San Diego. When it became public that the owner of the main convention hotel had given a lot of money to the anti-gay Prop 8 campaign, some AHA members tried to pressure the AHA into moving the convention. The AHA refused, claiming it could cost up to $700,000 to break the contract with the hotel.
Now, that does not mean that it would have cost the Tea-tards that much money, but it does show that it can be very expensive to suddenly cancel an event like this.
BTW, the article mentions a couple other examples of conventions paying a penalty for canceling at the last minute.
hnn.us/roundup/entries/59214.html
flukebucket
@Restrung:
I second this. It made for some mighty interesting reading.