Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.

When do the post office & the dmv weigh in on the wuhan virus?

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Anyone who bans teaching American history has no right to shape America’s future.

You can’t love your country only when you win.

Come on, man.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

“What are Republicans afraid of?” Everything.

T R E 4 5 O N

A snarling mass of vitriolic jackals

The willow is too close to the house.

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Schmidt just says fuck it, opens a tea shop.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

Prediction: the GOP will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

The party of Reagan has become the party of Putin.

You are here: Home / Constitutional fee-fees

Constitutional fee-fees

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If there’s anyone out there who’s more sick of talking about Sarah Palin, then that person must be one of Andrew Sullivan’s interns. But when a possible major party presidential nominee says we need to “reload” to protect the fee-fees of a radio host who is hurt by the fact that some of her sponsors don’t like it when she uses racial epithets, it’s probably worth a post:

Also too, because I am really sick of this stuff, here’s a funny teatard tee-shirt from Wonkette:

And, in honor of Pam Geller and Howard Dean, here’s Fishbone doing “Party At Ground Zero”:

Update. Our very own JenJen asks a very good question:

Reader Interactions

79Comments

  1. 1.

    joe from Lowell

    Dr. Laura got in trouble for saying “nigger” over and over and over.

    “Don’t retreat, reload.” That’s Sarah Palin’s reaction to someone who gets in trouble for calling people niggers. “Reload.”

  2. 2.

    K. Grant

    My guess is that the ex-gov doesn’t even know who Dr. Laura is, just something else to be exercised about.

    A question – has the quitter ever said anything positive or constructive? Ever? What a miserable existence.

  4. 4.

    Mike Kay

    Palin demands David Letterman’s firing over a joke about her pregnant daughter, yet saying ni66er, Kike, Spic, Gook is funny!.

    Wht’s this country coming to when you can’t call anyone Ni66er anymore!?!

  6. 6.

    K. Grant

    Ugh, and can we please buy these right wing fanatics a US Constitution with the First Amendment highlighted. Have any of them read (I know, bit of a stretch for the quitter) the bloody thing? Have they not quite figured out what the thing actually says?

  7. 7.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    Sarah Orwell Palin: Quitting is winning!
    of course, in her own case, as a greedy, lazy, little fame-junkie, she was right

  10. 10.

    Little Boots

    The shackles of a national radio show seem almost as burdensome as the shackles of a governorship. Fight the Power, bitches!

  12. 12.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @K. Grant:

    A question – has the quitter ever said anything positive or constructive? Ever? What a miserable existence.

    It always struck me, when she was campaigning in ’08, that she was happiest when the crowd was booing and snarling and angry. “High school bitchy” may be her style, but deep-down, she’s much worse than that.

  14. 14.

    KG

    we could have some fun with the teabaggers on this. when they bitch about Dr Laura losing her job ask, “so what’s more important, free speech or the free market?” Then follow up with things like, “her sponsors voted with their money and said they wouldn’t sponsor her show any more, are you suggesting that they have to spend their money on her show?” Or, “I thought businesses and people had the right to spend their money how ever they wanted, why are you telling people who objected to Dr Laura using the n-word that they can’t spend their money how they want?”

  15. 15.

    Zuzu's Petals

    I wonder how much the Mad Sow would appreciate this delicious bit of irony. Laura S. in 2004:

    I am extremely disappointed in the choice of Sarah Palin as the Vice Presidential candidate of the Republican Party. …………I’m stunned – couldn’t the Republican Party find one competent female with adult children to run for Vice President with McCain? I realize his advisors probably didn’t want a “mature” woman, as the Democrats keep harping on his age. But really, what kind of role model is a woman whose fifth child was recently born with a serious issue, Down Syndrome, and then goes back to the job of Governor within days of the birth?

  16. 16.

    J.W. Hamner

    What I find most depressing about all this, is that I suspect that Palin’s conception of “1st Amend.rights” is probably believed by a large majority of Americans: the sacred right to say anything you want without any repercussions. You’ll see comments to the effect of “Hey 1st Amendment!” whenever anyone gets punished for saying something vile.

  17. 17.

    Albatrossity

    I guess the refudiator’s memory is as bad as her grammar. In 2008 Dr. Laura blasted her, and the McCain campaign, on the basis of the “family values” exhibited by the Wasilla Chillbillies.

    I’m stunned – couldn’t the Republican Party find one competent female with adult children to run for Vice President with McCain? I realize his advisors probably didn’t want a “mature” woman, as the Democrats keep harping on his age. But really, what kind of role model is a woman whose fifth child was recently born with a serious issue, Down Syndrome, and then goes back to the job of Governor within days of the birth?

  19. 19.

    Nick

    @J.W. Hamner:

    that I suspect that Palin’s conception of “1st Amend.rights” is probably believed by a large majority of Americans: the sacred right to say anything you want without any repercussions.

    unless, of course, you’re a Muslim, then every single Muslim must atone for your words.

  20. 20.

    IronyAbounds

    Caribou Barbie shits on the 1st Amendment rights of Muslims to practice their religion where they want, and tries to defend that by saying she is simply exercising her 1st Amendment right to protest, but gets her knickers in a wad because people are exercising their 1st Amendment rights to complain about Dr. Laura’s tirade about not being able to use Ni**er just like black comedians do. I know it’s a horrible horrible word, and should never ever be used, but if the C word (hint, not cancer) was invented for someone, it is the former Half-Term Governor of the State of Alaska.

  22. 22.

    b-psycho

    To think there’s people who take this empty headed yokel seriously. “Reload!”, in reference to racial slurs? Really?

    This is how we can tell it’s not a bot script sending these tweets. A bot would be more coherent.

  23. 23.

    KG

    @Nick: I think it’d be more than a few bullets. Biden would become another LBJ, having license to do much more than his predecessor could have done. They’d have to take out quite a few people to accomplish banana republicanism.

    ETA: I’m surprised the Wingularity hasn’t yet noticed that the line of succession for the presidency now goes like this: Black Guy (current); White Guy; Italian Woman; Asian guy.

  24. 24.

    asiangrrlMN

    Now I am considered spam. Just testing to see if I can post at all.

    @Alice Blue: I am the same way. She rouses something very nasty within me. I try to keep exposure to her minimal lest I get cancer or seriously consider taking out my rusty pitchfork.

  25. 25.

    Lolis

    No way this woman will ever be president. Keep on talking, or twittering, Sarah. The stupid becomes so apparent even conservatives will have to admit it … eventually.

  26. 26.

    Mike Kay

    @Albatrossity: you win.

    Yup. too funny. Dr. Laura caters to the wouldn’t-it-be-great-if-we-could-back-to-the-50s crowd preaches against women in the workfoce.

  27. 27.

    Nick

    @KG: I wasn’t even talking about Obama. I was thinking of the first redneck to take out a black family in Applachia and say “Sarah Palin said reload and I did”

  28. 28.

    Little Boots

    The teabaggers live in the now. Indeed they live in the never was. They are as impervious to reality as they are to the Bush years and the last 20 years. They have reached a kind of nirvana, knowing neither the past nor the future. They simply are. And Sarah Palin is their Bodhisattva. We must meet them on their own terms or not at all.

  29. 29.

    jl

    Shouldn’t the tea bag itself be in the snakes mouth? Or two of them?

    I didn’t know about the joke until some one explained the term. I was watching a clip with some friends of some GOP congressperson on a news talky show shaking two teabags on either side of his head, and they cracked up. I didn’t get it. That was back when teabaggers self identified as ‘teabaggers’.

    I may still be slow on the concept.

  30. 30.

    KG

    @Nick: Ah, sorry, was thinking a different way, when I read “one stray bullet”… holy shit… i just realized who Palin is… she’s Eric Cartman. I can see her running down the hallways yelling, “It’s ON! It’s ON! Race War! Race War! It’s on!”

  31. 31.

    Martin

    I’m a bit uncomfortable about the allusion of ‘taking off the shackles’ (borrowing a phrase from Malcolm X) being paired with Dr. Laura’s ability to more freely point out that blacks are too uppity.

  32. 32.

    asiangrrlMN

    FYWP. For some reason, it won’t let me post a link to Michael Berube’s site. He posted an entry on August 9th containing his version of the right’s Constitution. It was posted here earlier. Too bad FYWP is being such a problem.

    @jl: You are in the virtual doghouse, mister. It’s the couch for you tonight!

  33. 33.

    Anya

    @Alice Blue: I was about to say the same thing. I really abhor that dimwitted parasite. She is a cancer that will grow in this country until it destroys the political discourse beyond repair. I want her never to appear in my computer monitor but everyday, there she is saying another unbelievably abhorrent thing.

  34. 34.

    asiangrrlMN

    Maybe it’s just any link now that it considers me spam. Let’s see. Kiss Off, WP.

    Strange. That worked. Oh noez! WP is a tool of the GOP! They are oppressing my 1st Amendment Right to Post Liberal Links! (Caps for emphasis).

    Naptime.

  35. 35.

    jomo

    There is nothing she writes that doesn’t reference an evil, unAmerican other. Her entire political worldview consists of keeping half of America outside her clique.

  36. 36.

    Annie

    Ultimate irony. Palin can use the words “reload” in reference to a racial slur and reference the 1st Amend., while refudiating American Muslims for exercising their Constitutional rights.

    This is emblematic of conservatives — the Constitution only applies to individuals, groups and religions they like.

    The good news is that she sounds more insane with ever twit she twits. The bad news is that she is taking more and more Americans along with her insanity.

  37. 37.

    New Yorker

    @K. Grant:

    A question – has the quitter ever said anything positive or constructive? Ever? What a miserable existence.

    Better question: has any endorsement from Queen Sarah the Stupid done any good for the candidate receiving it? It seems her candidates keep going down in flames in GOP primaries, say nothing of general elections.

  38. 38.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    But really, what kind of role model is a woman whose fifth child was recently born with a serious issue, Down Syndrome, and then goes back to the job of Governor within days of the birth?

    I’d completely forgotten that. A key part of Physical Therapist Laura’s schtick was that you were either “your kids’ mom” or you had a job. She, of course, was exempt from her own rule ’cause she brought little Pugsley to work with her.

  40. 40.

    jl

    @asiangrrlMN: Aw, shucks. My fake internet wife doesn’t ‘understand’ me. I’ll have to start hanging out with the guys at the sports bar, drinking beer.

    Regarding your comments being tagged as spam: that has happened to me. Maybe the intertubes has decided that your email has something that looks spammy in it. That was the reason my comments got IDd as spam.

    Like, your email goes something like asiangrrlMN at s * s h * l * s t dot com, or something.

  41. 41.

    Mark S.

    @asiangrrlMN:

    I try to keep exposure to her minimal lest I get cancer or seriously consider taking out my rusty pitchfork.

    What, is the pitchfork only for special occasions these days?

  44. 44.

    newhavenguy

    The contemporary Right does have some, uh, interesting ideas about the Constitution. So “Effin’ R’d” that it is nearly impossible to mock. JenJen’s little jab…priceless.

    The shirt’s great; my pre-ordered one finally shipped. I used to like the Gadsen flag, dammit. Why should Tim McVeigh and the ‘baggers get to own it?

  46. 46.

    KG

    @Mark S.: the rusty pitchfork is for special occasions. it’s like the fine China on Christmas/Passover/Thanksgiving only with the ability to give you tetanus.

  47. 47.

    asiangrrlMN

    @jl: Nope. I can post everything but that one link. Very strange. And, you are in the doghouse for (mock) supporting whites-only establishments in a thread below–unless you mean whites-only and ME. Then we’re still cool. And, the pitchfork is not for you–it’s for La Palina.

    @Mark S.: It’s breaking down from overuse, and I don’t have time to season another one properly. Again, it involves nudity, chanting, and it starts at midnight. If I tell you more, I have to fork you.

    @KG: Ha! Thanks for the laugh. Love it.

  48. 48.

    Mark S.

    @jomo:

    There is nothing she writes that doesn’t reference an evil, unAmerican other. Her entire political worldview consists of keeping half of America outside her clique.

    Exactly. Anyone who isn’t white, small-town, uneducated, and fundamentalist Christian is out of the clique. She might be the most depressing politician I’ve ever listened to. She’s the female Rush Limbaugh.

  50. 50.

    Hob

    @jl:

    your email goes something like asiangrrlMN at s * s h * l * s t dot com

    Is soc*al*st.com an email domain for very ironic people? Like quaker.mil or palin.gov?

  51. 51.

    asiangrrlMN

    @El Cid: Hi, FH#3. Not me. I love torches. I love fire. I need to start pairing them together, methinks.

    @Hob: Melikey! I want that email addy. I am for the people, of the people, and by the people.

  52. 52.

    Cris

    I would just like to say: Fishbone’s eponymous debut had six tracks, three of which fucking rule. And those three are enough for me.

  53. 53.

    jl

    @El Cid: Pitchforks are easy to find and easy to learn. I went out looking for a good torch for The Revolution, and all I found were lousy tiki torches you stick in the lawn.

    Where do the rabble get good torches these days?

    Please let me know or I will show up with just this lousy pitchfork.

  55. 55.

    jl

    @asiangrrlMN: My understanding is that the rules of good snark style prevent explicit mentions, exceptions and carve outs for specific individuals. I think there is something about it in the Constitution too.

    But now that I know you travel with a rusty pitchfork… I will figure out a work around in future comments.

  59. 59.

    Cris

    Speaking of Fishbone’s first album, it ends with the immortal line:

    LYING piece of sack of SHIT,
    slut trash can scummis dirt bag
    BIIIIITCH

    Which has nothing to do with this thread, of course.

  60. 60.

    Suffern ACE

    Pitchforks, torches and a rail. Don’t forget the rail. It is really hard to run them out of town without the rail.

  61. 61.

    El Cid

    @jl: I thought they were always those big perfectly conical lumpy clubs that people in lightning-lite villages always used along with giving the torches tasers.

  62. 62.

    CB

    these are not the actions, or words, of a presidential candidate nor of a serious thinker.

    these are the words and arguments of my drunk friends at 3 in the am.

    a joke of a people we are.

  63. 63.

    BobS

    I fully support Dr.Laura’s First Amendment right to shout “Nigger!” in a packed movie theater showing the latest Tyler Perry film.

  64. 64.

    joe from Lowell

    There are people on this thread – all women, I gather – who hate Palin more than they hate Bush. Or Cheney.

    I don’t get it. Yeah, she sucks, but a lot of people suck. When I think of someone who really ticks me off, I think of James Inhofe. That guy suuuuuuuuuuuucks.

    Sarah Palin? Maybe it’s not a guy thing.

  65. 65.

    Nick

    @joe from Lowell: Inhofe sucks, but at least no one pays attention to him. this woman is, for lack of better phrase, a media whore. She’s proud her doucheness and tells Americans to be proud too.

  66. 66.

    Jay

    In re: what Palin would say if Dr. Laura had shouted the “R Word”: recall that she defended Rush Limbaugh following his use of it, and has been accused-indirectly by Levi Johnston’s sister-of calling Trig “My little r-tard baby” (I see the offending word used around here sometimes. Not to troll, because I read this blog every day and know the vast majority of folks mean no harm, but no less a blogging heavyweight than TNC said, bravely and publicly, that he’d knock it off. Y’all should try it.) After the Limbaugh business, I now believe Levi’s sister, and while I’m at it, let me just say that, as a young American with Cerebral Palsy, I hate it when Sarah The Snowbilly claims to speak for people like me, when it should be clear that she has a record of supporting policies that hurt those with serious handicaps. It’s bad enough that my “mild” case keeps me out of the military, but it’s even worse when this vile woman opens her mouth, supposedly on behalf of me and my family.

    Sermon over.

  67. 67.

    lawnorder

    Do you guys have to post this idiot’s tweets ?

    Seriously, is like forcing someone to listen to a retelling of an erotic dream with John Candy and Maggie Tatcher. Creepy disgusting demented and completely untethered from reality.

  68. 68.

    DougJ

    @joe from Lowell:

    I kind of hear where you’re coming from, but Nate Silver, who is smarter than me certainly, thinks she’s 1-in-3 to be the Republican nominee. So I think the fear is warranted.

    I don’t think it’s time to start Trigg-truthing but if people want to be freaked out by her, I’m not going to criticize.

  69. 69.

    Comrade Kevin

    @joe from Lowell:

    There are people on this thread – all women, I gather – who hate Palin more than they hate Bush. Or Cheney.

    Bush and Cheney are out of office, and have a limited ability to cause this country much more harm.

  70. 70.

    asiangrrlMN

    @joe from Lowell: Oh no. I am an equal opportunity loather, and the reason I hate her in particular is very different than the reason I despise W. and Cheney. However, they are not running around bleating shit like this (any more. Cheney, for awhile couldn’t shut his big yap), so I have no reason to display said loathing quite so vividly. If W. and/or Cheney were to start tweeting and going on FB saying shit like this, or in the case of Cheney, going on news shows again, I would be all over their shit, too. I will say that a part of the loathing I have for her is that she is a woman using feminism in a way that is disgusting.

    @Nick: Plus, everything she says is treated like the next coming from god. She gets deference paid to her that is totally unearned and way the fuck out of proportion to her actual worth.

  71. 71.

    Breezeblock

    It is amazing how the Chillbilly inserts herself in every possible issue, all to keep the $ rolling in.

    Her voice makes me plead for nails on a chalkboard instead.

  73. 73.

    JCT

    @joe from Lowell: It’s also because she was picked because she was supposed to be this uber-woman. Meant to attract mythical PUMAS and held up as this fucking role model for women. “Look, she’s hawt and has 5 kids and a career and shoots things!”. Who cares if she’s nasty and doesn’t have two functional synapses in her head- look at her legs! Every professional woman I know was aghast- hate on sight.

    The fact that she then quit her elected job, runs around grifting (and paying no attention to those kids- could you imagine what the coverage would be if she were a Dem? Bad mother stories 24/7) and is STILL a serious candidate is just symbolic of what is wrong with the US political scene.

    That’s why it’s a bit of a girl thing.

    Crap. Up goes my BP.

  77. 77.

    bcinaz

    I get it now. Wingers never have to accept responsibility for their actions: (Gun crimes, hate crimes, race baiting rants), because the Bill of Rights says so. Except when the Bill of Rights protects the rights of the people and circumstances (Women’s Reproductive Privacy, Birthright Citizenship, Terror Detainees, Muslims, Gays and Lesbians) they hate, then it’s time to get rid of some of those ‘minority rights’ amendments.

    It must be confusing to live so completely untethered.

  79. 79.

    lawnorder

    @joe from Lowell:
    Ya she grates on me, as she is everything I try not to be myself, as a woman: shallow, ignorant, self-entitled, mean, irresponsible.

    She used to drive me nuts, till it dawned on me why so many women love her. She is their end goal. They want to be her. Famous, rich, and with a bully pulpit through no effort of their own, just for being “real am’rican”.

    Hey, I’d like a gig like that too!

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